Bits of Sunshine
by Terans-DinosaurCostume
Summary: What do you do when you wake up in a TV show? Purposely mess up the plot and make Stefan's life a living hell. Clarissa assumed she was dreaming, but she's not waking up, and between family drama with this girl who is apparently her twin and a pot smoking younger brother, Clarissa can't seem to stop bumping into Damon.
1. Chapter 1

Declaimer: Yeah, I don't own anything.

So, yeah. This is one of those OC-WAKES-UP-IN-FICTIONAL-WORLD types of things. This is a strictly Stelena and Damon/OC fanfic, no love triangles but a lot of vampire dickery and lots of pro-Damon-being-happy/pro-everyone being happy. For a few chapters, the plot is going to basically follow TVD's. And then it's going to explode into a million pieces because this OC is a toolbag.

Unlike a few other OC-FALLS-INTO-TVD I've come across, this OC isn't going to be Elena's shadow and follow her around/steal lines. She's going to go out of her way to make everyone's lives hell. And unlike other fics I've come across, her coming into the TVD world is going to be significant to plot and will eventually be explained. Woo.

* * *

_Where the hell am I?_

Confusion chased away the lingering sleep, my mind struggling to clear as I continued to groggily stare at the unfamiliar room, sitting up in the unfamiliar bed. This is super. Waking up in a stranger's house—never done _that_ before. I guess there's a first time for _everything_.

Maybe I went out and for some reason decided to get blithering drunk and threw my virginity at someone. That was _totally _possible. Because I _totally _drank.

Awkwardly, I shoved the Minnie Mouse sheets off myself and froze, staring down at myself, _at the pajamas I didn't own_, in a state of choking terror. My stomach flipped and twisted, panic flooding.

_Someone had dressed me_!

Someone—someone took me out of my _clothes _and put me in _pajamas_!

I swallowed the scream that was building in my throat, slamming my eyes shut. Calm down. _Calm down, calm down, calm down_. It was okay. I was _okay_. I needed to remain clam. Shakily, I peeled my eyes open, trying to control my breathing as my heart slammed against my ribcage painfully.

C'mon, Clare, friggin' calm down. It's fine. Totally, completely, one hundred percent _okay_. I needed to keep calm, had to keep calm… Otherwise… _otherwise _panicking and thinking irrationally might get me killed. Just… Creep out of the room, find a phone, call for help.

Okay. Yeah. Sounded logical. Sounded good.

Was I kidnapped?

What I had done last night?

I had been in my apartment. Right? Yeah. I had been in my apartment and… I was with my roommate. And she was making me watch some TV show.

_And then nothing_.

Blank.

I couldn't _remember_.

Oh God, oh God, oh God.

Had I been… Kidnapped? Chloroformed? _Drugged_?

I sucked in a shaky breath and glanced around the room quickly. It looked like a fairly average room (and not at all like some creepy kidnapper's dungeon of despair). Pale yellow walls with various posters of bands that I _liked_, and white Christmas lights that hung on the wall above the _Minnie Mouse_ themed bed, which was pushed into the corner of room. There was a white closet a few feet from the bed with a tall dresser next to it, and a pretty white vanity dresser up against the wall across from the bed and in between two doors.

Nausea crept up, horror twisting in my stomach painfully. This room was designed for _me_. It was everything I would have ever wanted, something my mother would never allowed because of how _childish _it was. I was _obsessed _with Minnie Mouse. And I was _in _Minnie Mouse pajamas!

No. No, no, no. This wasn't designed for me. That's _crazy_.

Someone's obsessed with me and kidnapped me!

Gah!

I glanced down at myself again, my heart skipping—were… _were my boobs bigger?_ They were definitely bigger! I was basically flat chested! How the hell would my boobs have grown this much overnight?

I grabbed my chest. Oh God, this was real. They felt real. What—what the _hell_…?

Unless it wasn't _overnight_!

Maybe I've been in a drug haze for—like… Months!

I was thinner, too! Like I'd always been tiny, but I was pretty sure I was a good five pounds smaller! Because I've been in a drug haze! Because I've been sold into a sex slave ring and they gave me boobs! And… put me in a nice room?

_Maybe I was abducted by aliens_.

A flicker of light snagged my attention, snapping me from my slowly panicking thoughts, and I jerked my head toward the vanity. I inched closer, holding my breath, as my reflection peered back at me.

I stared.

A girl I didn't know stared back at me.

I crept even closer, until I was directly in front of the mirror, staring at the reflection, my mind completely falling blank.

Who the hell was staring back at me?

That wasn't me.

I was still dark haired but my brown eyes were now a blue-gray color and I had a few freckles. I couldn't find an ounce of myself in the reflection. Was this… possible? No. _No_. This—it just… It wasn't possible. Like at all.

I lifted my hand, and the girl in the reflection copied.

I made faces and she made the same ones.

"BOO!"

This was some SciFi movie shit.

Like _FaceOff_.

I choked on my own air as my heartbeat spastically jolted, anxiety and panic crushing into me. How was this possible? Who was this girl and why was I looking through her eyes? _Where was I?!_

No, no, no, no.

This kind of stuff just doesn't happen!

It doesn't!

"Hey," a soft, almost timid, voice called quietly causing me to jump. I snapped my head toward the doorway and nearly shrieked in horror upon seeing that—that _girl_! That girl from that TV show! That vampire TV show! I gawked at her. "Bon's going to be here in, like… five minutes… Are you coming to school?"

What was her name? Elaine? I merely nodded, dumbstruck, eyeing her. Jesus help me. We looked terrifyingly similar. She offered an awkward smile and slid out of the room. I snapped my head back to the mirror. We had noticeable facial differences and my hair was a few shades darker but other than that we were obvious sister. Hell, we could even be _twins_.

I was dreaming, I realized with a hysterical giggle. I was _dreaming_! Like a rush, relief swept through me so powerfully I nearly fell over. Oh _God_. Okay. It was a dream. A crazy ass, trippy, dream. But this was what I get for being forced into a weekend of Vampire Diaries. Join my fandom, Clare! It'll be fun, my roommate promised. You'll like it, she said! Pffft.

Puppy does not want!

I was filled with regret the moment the show had started.

And now, when I woke up, I was going to kill her. I didn't care if that meant I'd rot away in jail. I freakin' thought I had been kidnapped. And then—I wasn't even sure where my train of thought had gone. This was all the result of a Vampire Diaries marathon, tumblr, zero sleep and a bag of pixie sticks. I was pretty sure the main chick didn't have a sister in the show.

WHICH MEANT I WAS A MARY-SUE!

_No!_

In my own friggin' dream!

What the hell?

Moodily, I slumped over to the closet and shifted through the clothes. Christ. Dream me had the same sense of style as real life me. Well, of course I did. Duh. It was _my _dream! I threw on a black, red polka-dotted, Minnie Mouse top, wiggled into faded skinny jeans, and slid into a pair of platform converse that had an old fashioned Minnie Mouse designed on them. I was pretty sure these were custom made. Fancy.

"_Clarissa_!" I heard someone shout and I rolled my eyes.

"Coming!" I snapped back, like, calm yourself! It takes a few friggin' minutes to get ready!

I was briefly disturbed that they knew my name, but remembered it was _my dream_, so. Yeah. Obviously they would! Irritated that I had to go to school in my own friggin' dream, I snatched a messenger bag with Minnie Mouse printed across the front of it and sauntered into the hall.

I bounced down the last step just as a flustered woman came skidding into view, halting at the door, and giving me an approving once over. I raised my eyebrows back at her.

"There's some coffee made if you want—not that I think you should have any. No you probably shouldn't—sorry, I'm late! Have a good first day, Clare!" She said quickly, rushing out the door and I frowned after her.

Who the hell was that?

S'whateva.

I sauntered into the kitchen just as a freakishly tall, messy haired, guy grunted a "don't start" at vampire girl. He rose a mega huge mug (it was obviously a bowl) to his mouth.

"Sup, little dude?" Because he was tall so I was mocking it. Get it? Oh man, I'm hilarious. He threw me a look and stalked past me. Rude. "Okay! Remember, _YOLO_!"

Hey, I was dreaming, and I _knew _I was dreaming. So I obviously was going to have fun with it. He turned to look at me like I was nuts and I smiled sweetly back at him.

"So… How are you feeling today, Clare?" Vampire girl asked hesitantly, leaning against the counter, holding the mega cup between her hands. Her dark eyes met mine awkwardly, like she was waiting for me to flip out or something.

Let's make this weirder and more awkward.

"Swiggity swag it's all in the bag," I stated dispassionately, looking at the girl seriously.

Surprise flickered across her face and she parted her lips, about to say something, when there was a knock at the door. Vampire girl put the mug down, leaning off the counter. "Must be Bonnie," she said with an awkward smile, like I was supposed to know who that was.

"Heeeeello!" A girl said in a cheerful singsong, inviting herself in rudely, and prancing into the kitchen, grinning at us widely. I immediately recognized her, she was the witch! She threw her arms out wide, as though to embrace us. "Elena! Clare! My two favorite twins!"

_Elena_, Miss Vampire Girl, laughed and it came off as sounding slightly relieved, all the tension rolling off her as she walked into Bonnie's arms. "We're the _only _twins you know, Bon," she reminded.

Bonnie waved the comment aside and turned her gaze toward me. "Get your butt over here, girl, and give me some love!"

Oh.

Well, _okay_. I tried to keep my face from crinkling up with displeasure as I awkwardly inched over to this fictional dream stranger. I stood there, politely letting her hug me and was annoyed at the sympathetic look she sent me. She glanced over toward Elena who nodded. What the heeeeell? Secret communication between the two of them about _me_? In my own friggin' dream? _So rude_.

Apparently I only had the ability to dream about rude fictional characters. Great.

"Care's gonna meet us at school," Bonnie said in a chipper voice as I followed the two out of the house. "She's actually already there. I think she said something about starting a new committee this year?"

Elena snorted. "That's so Caroline."

I eyed the freakin' blue Toyota Prius unhappily as Bonnie gushed to Elena how her Grams and Dad surprised her with this sometime over the summer. Woo frickin' hoo. Before hopping into the back, I snuck a glance at the license plate. Virginia? Why would I be dreaming of Virginia? What was even _in _Virginia worth dreaming about? I was pretty sure everything outside New York was a wasteland.

"Soooooo…" Bonnie began after a period of silence, in which I had spent staring at the passing town, taking in the unfamiliar buildings. I was hella creative, look at this whole world I'm imagining! "How have you been, Clare?" She was fishing.

But for what, I had no idea.

"Fine," I said with an indifferent shrug as Bonnie glanced at me from the rear view mirror.

"We're fine," Elena agreed quietly.

"Weeeell, I guess I'll tell you what I've been up to, then," Bonnie said happily. "I've been hanging out with Grams a lot this summer and she's been telling me I'm psychic." Spoiler warning, you're a witch. "Our ancestors were from Salem—witches and all that. I _know_, craaaaazy! But she went on and on and on and I'm like, put this woman in a home already!" Her tone was playful and amused, clearly stating she didn't actually feel that way.

"I dunno," I interrupted with a grin. "I think it's cool. I mean, imagine if you were?"

"Well… I _did _predict Obama," Bonnie allowed thoughtfully, nodding. "_And _I predicted Heath Ledger. And I _still _think Florida will break off and turn into little resort islands."

I found myself feeling more at ease, an amused grin twitching across my face. I liked this chick. "Sounds legit. Maybe you should write down your predictions in a book and see if they come true later on."

Bonnie made a humming noise of agreement. "That's not a bad idea at all," she said with a smile. All my ideas were pure brilliance. "What do you think, Elena? _Elena_!" My dream twin snapped her head around and Bonnie laughed. "Welcome back to _reality_!"

"Oh—I… I did it again, didn't I?" Elena groaned, sighing in frustration, and I wondered what her problem was. _Oh_. Right. Grieving teenager with dead parents. _Yikes_. "I'm sorry, guys, you were talking about…?"

"_Aboooout_," Bonnie sang. "Me being psychic now. Clare's _totally _on board with it."

"Yup. Gotta get with the times, Elena," I bobbed my head and Elena turned her head to give me a tiny, amused, look. I raised my eyebrows back at her and her expression became more relaxed. Her smile grew and she shook her head, turning back around.

"Riiiiight. Okay. Then predict something about me."

"I see—"

_THAWK_.

I jumped out of my skin as the two gasped, Bonnie slamming on her brakes and swerving to the side of the road.

"_CHRIST_!" I hissed, placing a hand over my pounding heart. Give me a friggin' heart attack! If this dream turned into a nightmare, I was _not _going to be happy!

"What _was _that!" Bonnie cried, turning around to look at me with wide eyes.

"You just hit a _bird_! Like a real friggin' bird!" I leaned forward, turning to look at my dream sister. She was white as a sheet, breathing hard. I felt a twinge of pity for her. "You… okay?"

Bonnie snapped her head toward the shaking girl, guilt and concern flashing across her now anxious face. "Oh my God, Elena! Are you okay? I'm—sorry—crap. Are you okay?" Worry stretched across Bonnie's voice.

"I-It's… It's okay," Elena managed after a moment, her voice shaking. "I'm—I'm fine, _really_. It's okay. I'm okay. It's fine."

I tapped my fingertips against the headrest, feeling antsy and awkward.

"It was—it was a bird, or something, it came out of nowhere," Bonnie continued anxiously and I was caught up with this bizarre need to comfort Elena. I just felt so bad for her, she was really shaken up. I placed a hand on her shoulder and she grabbed it, giving it a squeeze.

"It's f-fine—Bon, it's fine. I… I can't… I can't be freaked out b-by cars for the rest of my life," Elena whispered. That was a crap philosophy.

"Nobody is rushing you to get over _anything_, okay? That's bullcrap. There is no expiration date where you're supposed to be _suddenly _over something." I told her firmly and Elena turned, a sad little smile on her face. She needed a lot of hugs.

And a puppy.

"Clare's right," Bonnie said happily, turning to give me a wide smile before turning to Elena. "I predict this year is going to be kickass. I predict all the sadness, and anger," she glanced at me and I frowned, confused. "And dark times are over and you and Clare are going to be beyond happy."

"Cheers to that," I sat back. Only not, because I was going to wake up and they were going to be stuck in lots of horrible death and misery forever. Endless vampire dickery. It's canon. Inescapable canon.

It didn't take much longer to get to the school. I unhappily stared at the looming white and red building, _MYSTICA FALLS HIGH SCHOOL _printed in large white lettering. I almost rolled my eyes. _Mystic Falls _was such a supernatural name. Could they be any more obvious? Bonnie parked and I slid out of the car, awkwardly linking arms with Elena feeling a need to latch onto some kind of familiarity. She paused to look at me but didn't say anything as we followed Bonnie through the throngs of students scattered in front of the building. Which was kind of weird. Why the hell were these kids hanging outside the school?

"Here's to hoping we have a fantastic year," Elena muttered to me as Bonnie pushed open the doors and I was swamped with a horrible realization. Dream or not, I didn't know my class schedule! Or where any of my freakin' classes were! "I'm just glad you're in all my classes this year… I don't know if I could handle it if you weren't."

I offered an awkward smile, my nerves brimming. _Thank God_. I didn't know why it made me so stupidly anxious. I mean, this was a _dream_. I could strip down and run around naked if I wanted.

"Well, this sucks. Nobody has gotten hotter over the summer." Bonnie grumbled.

"Maybe there'll be some new students," I grinned, amused. "Like some sexy beast." Like some murderous vampires.

Bonnie rolled her eyes playfully. "Yeah _right_. Nobody wants to live here. It's snoozeville."

"You never know," Elena said with a small shrug. "Someone might decide to pick up their entire life and relocate. Maybe they like boring routine where everybody knows you and your business."

Ohh, just you wait. It'll be all hot vampire with smoldering eyes and instant true love. Bonnie laughed as we stopped at a locker. Which I guess it was hers, since she was playing with the combination. Either that or we were assholes and broke into other's people's lockers for the shits and giggles. Her laughter faded, a frown crossing her face, as she glanced over our shoulders. I turned my head, spotting a stereotypical blonde jock standing at his locker, staring at Elena like he was emotionally devastated. Or about to shoot everyone. I wasn't really sure. Elena waved and he turned away.

Wow. Rude.

Only rude people in this dream world.

"He hates me," Elena muttered, turning around and leaning against the lockers. I patted her on the shoulder as she crossed her arms, a guilty pout tilting across her face.

There, there, dream sister. I'm sure if you're cute in his face he'll be into you hardcore.

"That's not hate," Bonnie assured but I wasn't sure, 'cause it kind of looked like hate. Or anguish. Maybe hateful anguish. "That's 'you dumped me but I'm too cool to show it. But secretly I'm listening to Air Supply's Greatest Hits'."

Well that would explain his angst. Poor guy.

"Or Whitney Houston." He kind of looked like the type to sing that alone in his bedroom while crying. Elena shot me a look that I grinned at.

"Clare!"

I jumped as a perky blonde bounced into our space, throwing her arms around me. I flailed and we fell back into the lockers as she hugged me tightly. Oh my God, why? This wasn't super awkward or anything! She pulled back, worry flashing across her face.

"Do you… still need space?" The worry was quickly replaced by irritation and she swatted my arm. Ouch! Why?! "You ignored all my calls! I haven't heard from you all summer! Like, I get it, you're in a funk, but I freakin' missed you."

"Sorry?" I didn't know what to say. I must've been dream friends with her. Christ. She narrowed her blue eyes at me briefly before turning to Elena.

"So? Are you going to finally talk to me? How have you been?" She demanded and Elena rolled her eyes with a smile.

"Caroline, relax, I'm fine." Elena assured. Caroline raised her eyebrows, clearly not believing her, and her big blue eyes flickered in my direction. How the hell was I supposed to know? I offered a noncommittal shrug.

"_Really_?"

"Yes. Much better." Elena was the world's shittiest liar. Caroline glanced at me, again, and I gave the tiniest shake of my head. Sighing, Caroline pulled Elena into a hug.

"You can talk to me, I'm here for you," Caroline said softly.

"Awww, same here." Bonnie said, grabbing my arm and dragging me into the now four-way hug.

"Guys, we're fine! Seriously!" Elena insisted with a laugh as I wiggled out of the weird hug.

Caroline released Elena, grinning. "Okay, see you guys later?" I nodded, because I wasn't sure what else to do or say. She pinned me with a look. "When I text you, you better text me back." She narrowed her eyes at me and I raised my hands in defense, nodding. "Good."

She spun on her heels and pranced away.

Christ.

"I guess we should get to first period," Bonnie groaned. "Mr. Tanner first thing in the morning, I think I've been cursed."

"Maybe you could use your witch powers and turn him into a frog," I suggested causing the dark skinned girl to roll her eyes and swat my arm, a grin spreading across her face. Not even kidding, if I was a witch, it'd be the first spell I learned.

"Shut _up_," Bonnie snorted. A serious look followed her amusement, her gaze softening. "I'm glad you're becoming like your old self again… You too, Elena, I really missed you guys."

Okaaay?

"Can't be sad or angry forever," Elena shrugged a shoulder, glancing in my direction.

I hated how I felt like I was missing half the conversation, because I was totally out of the loop on what the hell they were going on about. I guess I've been pissed off and moody in dream land. Maybe I've been like stuck on my period for a while.

A ringing went off and I dug through my messenger bag, finding a pink flip phone. Huh. Okay. Putting it on silent, I opened a text message from Caroline: _r things going 2 go bak 2 how they were?_

"Hold up," Bonnie grabbed my arm, preventing me from walking into Elena, as I quickly texted a reply to Caroline, letting her know I was gonna be a little off but we were on track to being BFF again. "Who's _this_?"

"All I see is back," Elena commented on, amused, and I looked up, glancing at them and then into the office. Oh look. There's that vampire guy. Goodie.

"It's a hot back," Bonnie hummed just as my phone buzzed. I flipped it open.

Caroline's text: _good I missed u its not the same w/ bonnie_

I knew it was a dream, and I knew once I woke up none of this mattered, but I smiled anyway, feeling warmed. Having a dream best friend was kind of cool. I texted her back: _that's because nobody can have a better friendship than us. I'm sorry if I was distant. It'll change, ok?_

"Maybe Clare's the psychic," Elena joked lightly. "She _did _just call there being a new student." I spoiled it for everyone.

"Mmm, we can set up a fortune reading table in the hall and give people readings between classes," I deadpanned as I pocketed my cellphone.

"I'm sensing…" Bonnie began in a playful voice, raising one hand to her temple. "Seattle. And he plays the guitar." And he eats people.

Wait I think this is the _good _vampire.

He eats _bunnies_.

Classy as hell.

Elena snorted. "You're really going to run this whole psychic thing into the ground, huh?"

"Pretty much," Bonnie grinned, tilting her gaze to me. "What do you think, Clare?"

"I think you're dead right." I said cheerfully and she nudged my shoulder, grinning playfully.

"No, I mean about the hottie. What do you _think_?"

Pfft. "I've seen better backs."

Elena's grin slid off her face and she grabbed my arm. "We'll be right back," she muttered and I frowned at her, confused, turning to glance at Bonnie as Elena dragged me away.

Okaaay, apparently she was leading us to the boy's bathroom? "I support you and how you feel about your body," I assured the taller girl seriously as she ripped the door open and tugged us inside.

"_Jeremy_!" Elena didn't even seem to hear me as she launched herself at the tall guy from before. I awkwardly stood in the corner. It's not like I'd never been in a boy's bathroom before, sometimes when I had to pee mega bad and the ladies was packed, I'd sneak in.

But that's mostly because I'm an asshole. This was just weird.

"Are you _serious _right now?" She snapped at the kid. "It's the _first _day! The first day, Jer! And you're _stoned_!"

Oh God.

"No I'm not." The kid, Jeremy, denied moodily.

Cue the music. Here comes a 7th Heaven family drama moment.

"Where is it?" Elena demanded, trying to check his pockets. He slapped her hands away. "Is it on you?"

"Oh my God, stop, okay?" He stepped away from her. "You need to chill out!"

"Eleeena," I grabbed her arms before he could lunge at him. "It's okay! Everyone… You know, grieves differently! It's not so bad, he's only doing _pot_." Like he could be in here doing meth.

She shook me off and whirled around, staring at me with hurt anger. "That's just like you, Clare! Yeah, let's play the good twin, bad twin! I'm _not _the bad guy here! And you always take Jeremy's side!" She had no reason to be mad at me! Awkwardly, I shifted, guilt washing over me. I didn't even know why! I had nothing to be guilty over! "This is _not _okay!"

"He needs to sort himself out! Yelling at him and making him feel guilty isn't helping him! When he's ready to talk, he will!" It didn't matter if I didn't really get what was going on, but this was my dream, damn it. I was holding my ground. Elena threw her hands up.

"No! I gave him a summer pass but I am _done _watching him destroy himself! Is that what you're going to let him do? Destroy his future by wasting away smoking pot?" She tossed Jeremy a look as I was left to wonder how this all happened so quickly. "Just so you know, I will be here, to ruin your buzz _every time_. You got it? Clare might not think this is serious, but _I _do."

Without another word, she turned around and stomped out of the bathroom. Jeez. That was exhausting. When was I going to wake up? I glanced back to the upset Jeremy.

"Hey…" This was really awkward. We were siblings, right? "Uh, don't shut me out okay?" What else to say? "You're—uh… not the only one hurting." I didn't know what else to say to the kid. But I knew what grief could do, it wasn't something that ever really left you, and I kind of felt like I had to be somehow—you know, sisterly.

"You don't have to stick up for me, I'm not a kid anymore." Jeremy snapped after a really awkward moment of silence passed. Okaaaay.

"We're, you know… Family and shit," Right? "Sooo… I'm gonna go… I guess you really took the whole _YOLO _thing to heart."

I quickly made for the exit, hoping Elena wasn't too far away. I'd be screwed to awkwardly wander the halls of my dream, because like hell I knew where anything was!

I nearly crashed into some loser standing in front of the door.

"Whoops, sorry dude!" I apologized quickly while cursing him for standing directly in front of the door, scanning the hall for Elena's moody ass.

"It's—it's alright," the guy stammered as I easily side stepped him, spotting Elena and prancing after her.

"Look, Elena, I'm sorry, I just—" I began once I caught up with her.

"It's fine," she murmured, glancing over her shoulder before turning back to look at me. "I get it. Maybe this will help him snap out of it…"

Who?

Oh. Right.

That Jeremy kid.

"Did you _see _his face?" Bonnie asked excitedly as she fell into step with us. Who? See whose face? "Oh my God, he's totally hot!"

"Who?" I demanded unhappily. Why was I constantly left out of the loop?

"Yeah, I bumped into him," Elena said with a faint smile as Bonnie frowned at me.

"God, Clare, can you be any more oblivious? The new kid!"

The vampire. "Ew. You mean that weirdo hanging out in front of the bathroom door? Who even does that? I'll tell you who. Freaky people with issues. You should avoid him."

They decided to not take my amazing advice that would have saved their lives, and instead talked about the possibilities of where he was from (a coffin) and what he was like (a vampire) all the way to class.

This was literally the worst dream I have ever had. Could this teacher make history anymore boring…? I passed the time by drawing little doodles of Batman. Like, what kind of dream makes you listen to a teacher talk about history? For what felt like _forty minutes_? When I wake up, I'm immediately getting therapy. Something was clearly wrong with me.

At the end of class, Caroline snatched me up.

"Did you see the new student?" Caroline demanded gleefully, smirking. God, no, why? "He's so hot!"

Noooo.

"He's not my type."

Caroline rolled her eyes, snorting. "_You _don't have a type, you're like, friggin' asexual. You'll sooner start budding like a tree then go out with a guy." I would be a magnificent tree. "But, whatever! You're going to help me get him, right?" She batted her eyelashes at me and my lips twitched upward. I grinned at her.

Sure. Why the hell not?

"Yep. He won't stand a chance, Care," I promised happily, linking my arms with her. Surprise flashed before a wide smile burst across her face. She gave my arm a squeeze.

"_So _glad you're back," Caroline gushed. "This year is going to be amazing!"

By the time the school day was over with, I was about ready to fling myself out an open window. I'd already went through high school! What the _hell _was this?! Like I know they say dreams feel a lot slower when you're dreaming but this was _ridiculous_! Oh my God!

"Um," Elena tentatively hovered awkwardly next to me, dark eyes hesitant and I tilted away from glaring at the locker, looking for the witch.

"Where's Bonnie?"

"I… I'm gonna go visit Mom and Dad…" Elena's gaze lowered, guilt loud on her face, as she fidgeted. Okaaay. This was getting old fast.

"We're walking?" Is that what she was trying to tell me? I mean, no big deal. Whatever. Elena's dark eyes flashed up to meet mine. She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Yeah—this morning… it has me feeling a little _jumpy_…" Elena confessed awkwardly and I repressed a sigh.

"Okay. Let's get goin' then." I linked my arms through hers. Physical contact seemed to relax her and I wasn't really sure what the big deal was.

Everyone was really weird about the whole affectionate thing when it came to me.

Maybe dream me hated being touched.

It might've been a small town, but everything still felt like a billion miles away. I was starting to miss the city. It was calm and quiet here. I missed the constant noise and the smells and the people and the way the subway shook the ground under my feet.

I made do by skipping around Elena, playfully pulling her scarf off and wrapping it dramatically around my neck. Elena rolled her eyes, grinning.

"I'm… happy to see you in a good mood," she said softly. "It feels like it's been such a long time since I've even seen you smile." Spare me.

"Well, new school year, new beginnings!" I told her cheerfully as she led me through the creepy ass cemetery.

"Yeah. I guess so." Elena plopped down on the ground, leaning against a headstone. "I'm just gonna write in my journal for a sec."

I frowned at her as she made herself comfortable, opening a little book. Reeaally…? 'Cause writing angsty things in a cemetery was normal.

Whatever.

Maybe this represented something about myself. Dreams were weird like that.

I tossed her scarf back and slid my gaze toward the headstone across from us. _Grayson and Miranda Gilbert_. Must be my dead dream parents. Kind of cool that dream dad's name was Grayson. Sucks that dream mom's name was Miranda. I was now picturing my dream parents to be Dick Grayson and Miranda for Mass Effect. What an odd couple.

A black crew flew down on the gravestone and cawed angrily at me. Rude.

"This is just like in _The Crow_," I grinned, wiggling my fingers in mock greeting to the bird. I had never been so close to one before. This was kind of neat.

"This isn't creepy or anything," Elena mumbled with a sigh, twirling her pen between her fingers and I turned to give her a look. Says the girl writing sad poetry in a graveyard!

"Yup. Now a guy in face paint is gonna come out and kill us." I said teasingly and she threw me a look. "Hey! I'm just saying! Crows are the bringer of death."

"_Ravens _are the _messenger _of death, Clare," Elena corrected and I frowned back at her.

"Same thing." Like seriously. Don't even correct me, it's my dream.

Where was this fog coming from? I stepped away from the gravestone as she stood up, the thick white fog swirling around us. Was this normal for backwater middle of nowhere places to get sudden fog? Or were there some gothic kids somewhere in the graveyard with a fog machine?

"This just got super creepy!" I whispered, backing up. Elena nodded, moving closer to the bird, making a shooing motion with her hand. "Oh my God, don't get near it! Crows remember that kind of stuff! It'll come back to kill us!"

I was like eighty percent sure this dream was hurtling into a fucking nightmare!

"Shoo! Shoo!" Elena hissed and the bird flapped his wings, cawing angrily, as it flew away. She turned back to me. "It's okay. It's gone now."

I opened my mouth when an angry caw erupted. I jumped, anxiety crunching into me, as I whirled around. I screeched in surprise. The crow was _behind us_! My heart frantically sped up.

"I think we should go!" It didn't care if she didn't feel the same way, I was getting the hell out of here!

"Clare! Wait!" Elena called after me, the fog becoming thicker.

I was having a nightmare!

This was now a nightmare!

This was stupid! This dream was stupid! I wanted to wake up now!

"Care! Clare!" Elena's voice was getting further away and I just didn't care!

I sank to the ground, hugging my knees to my chest, squeezing my eyes shut tightly. I just wanted to wake up! I needed to wake up! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!

"Bad day?"

I snapped my head up at the sound of a slightly amused voice. Blinking rapidly, I peered up at a dark haired man who crouched down next to me, his striking blue eyes meeting mine. He was, by far, the most beautiful person I had ever seen.

And he looked oddly familiar.

Oh.

Wait.

Now I remembered.

It was the _Evil Vampire Brother_.

Great. Freakin' great.

"I'm dreaming and I can't wake up." I told him flatly causing his lips to twitch upward. "Are you going to kill me?"

Evil Vampire Brother furrowed his brow, blue eyes lit with mischief. "Mm? Now why would I do _that_?" He drawled in a puzzled tone. Bitch was toying with me. I saw enough episodes of Vampire Diaries to know that.

"Because we're in a creepy cemetery filled with fog." Maybe if I died in dream land, I'd wake up. "And we're surrounded by crows. That's a murder."

Evil Vampire Brother snorted, raising his eyebrows at me mockingly. Jerk. "You're just filled with positive thoughts, huh?" He gracefully rose to his feet, offering a hand.

I knew I probably shouldn't take it. I felt like somewhere, somehow, taking his hand was going to symbolize something. Dreams were mega weird like that. He tilted his head slightly and I decided, to hell with it, and reached up, taking it.

A jolt ran through me at the contact and I jerked my hand back, swaying slightly as I stood. What the _hell _was that? I frowned. Creepy. If he felt it, he didn't comment on it.

"So what are you doing in a cemetery?" I asked, brushing myself off.

"Stalking with the intent to kill," Evil Vampire Brother said pleasantly, a taunting smirk flickering across his lips. "_Obviously_. What else do people even _do _in cemeteries these days?"

_Oh my God_. Amusement sprang through me. "It's true. Tough business you're in," I said, playing along, with a solemn nod. "I heard it's really cut-throat."

"Mmhm. It's a dream job that people just _die _for," Evil Vampire Brother said, his voice dipping into a playful drawl. I tried to keep a straight face, but I ended up bursting into laughter. I felt like I haven't laughed all dream day. He squinted his blue eyes, his smirk growing. "You're fun, I _like _you."

"Thanks, you're not so bad yourself." I was pretty sure this was the point where he kills me.

"I'm Damon," he said instead of lunging at me and ripping my throat out. So he wanted to drag this out.

"I'm Clare—um, Clarissa," I said, totally awkward, offering a hand. Like what was I supposed to do? Be polite to the nice evil vampire, right?

Damon gently took my hand, his skin was warm and very real against mine, and brought it to his mouth. His blue gaze locked with mine as he kissed the back of my hand and I gaped back at him, warmth spreading across my cheeks.

Oh jeez.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Clarissa," Damon murmured lowly, his hot breath ghosting across the back of my hand. I merely stared back at him.

I bet he was imagining killing me. Yeah. He probably was. Just blood and guts everywhere.

I gently pulled my hand back, grinning in faint amusement. "You really got that whole McSteamy thing down pretty good," I commented on with a laugh. I flashed him a cheerful grin. If he wasn't gonna kill me, then I was leaving. "But I gotta jet. See you around, Damon." Only not, because I was waking up.

"Until the next time, Clarissa," he promised, and I was pretty sure that meant he was gonna stalk and kill me. What a sweetheart.

I turned away, hopefully finding the way Elena went before Damon decided it was dinner time. Sure, I'd like it if he'd just kill me so I'd wake up, but I really wasn't in the mood for it turning almost nightmare-y again.

"Clare!" Elena called, sounding relieved, as I stumbled down a steep hill. I nearly fell flat on my friggin' face! "Did you see which way he went?"

"Who?" I asked and she frowned, glancing around us. Damon?

"I… Never mind." She sighed. "Come on, let's go home."

* * *

"How was your first day?" The chick, who I had come to learn was our aunt Jenna, asked as she popped into the kitchen.

"It was fine," Elena said distractedly, flipping through a book that was on the island. She actually made us do our homework immediately when getting home.

It seriously sucked.

I had to do homework.

In my dream.

"I met a serial killer," I announced, picking up an apple from the fruit bowl. "We hit it off pretty decently, I don't think I'm on his list just yet."

Jenna and Elena stared at me and then at each other, both grinning.

"Good God, it's been far too long," Jenna said happily and I frowned at her as she leaned closer, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. "I'm glad you're feeling like your old self again, Clare."

What the shit?

I have been saying all this crap for the delicious shock value and they just accepted this as me being _normal_?

Well, _okay_, then.

I'd just have to up everything.

My phone buzzed as I took a bite out of the apple and I pulled it out. Caroline texted with: _meet me n bon at the grill_

The grill?

_Kay see you soon_, I texted back, turning to Elena. The plans have been made. "Care wants us to meet her and Bonnie at _the grill_."

Elena turned toward Jenna who was making her way to the fridge. "Is that okay, Jenna?"

Jenna nodded before pausing, spinning around to face us. "Waaaait. Don't be home late, it's a school night!" She made a face, amused, and Elena gave an approving nod.

"Perfect." Elena said with a grin, linking arms with me.

"Jenna levels up. She has reached _parental guardian_," I deadpanned. Great job. Give yourself a pat on the back.

"Ha. Ha." Jenna called after us as we reached the door.

Good Vampire Brother stood outside of the house, surprise flickering across his face. He lowered his hand, as if he had been about to knock, and I was pleased that I actually remembered this part of the episode.

"Oh!" Elena took a step backwards, surprised. Good Vampire Brother looked equally startled. "Hi!"

"Hi." He echoed, glancing between us, eyes slightly round.

"Who is _this_?" I wondered, sending a sly grin to Elena. She flushed prettily, an embarrassed smile tilting across her lips.

"Um, this is Stefan." She introduced, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear, turning to glance back at the vampire shyly. Aw. "Stefan, this is my twin sister Clarissa."

"You can call me Clare, everyone does," I grinned, pulling out my phone, remembering my devoted vow to Caroline. I texted: _Stefan stopped by should I invite him?_

"It's nice to meet you, Clare," Stefan said politely. Elena elbowed my arm in a sort of way that demanded _be polite_. I decided to pointedly ignore her and Stefan, choosing to look at my phone, and Stefan cleared his throat awkwardly. "I… uh… Just wanted to apologize for my disappearing act earlier."

Caroline text was immediate: _OMG YES but y is he there? ?_

"That's rude of you, Steffy," I said loudly. I could feel Elena's glare.

"Ignore my sister, she's an ass," Elena said pleasantly. Jerk. "It's fine. Really. No big deal. I get it, you don't like blood."

"Or he's a psycho murderer and the sight of your blood was too tempting," I suggested happily, texting Caroline back with: _dunno I think they ran into each other earlier and hes apologizing. Trying to make him sound like a dick to elena!_ "Because why else would a _nice guy _leave a hurt, bleeding, girl all alone?" I lifted my head, giving him a look, and his expression shifted toward uneasy.

Good.

"Clarissa!" Elena hissed and I smothered an amused grin.

"I'm truly sorry about that, how is your leg?" Stefan looked like a kicked puppy. "Is it better?"

"It's infected," I said gravely, with mock sadness. "We're going to have to cut it off. If only there had been someone there to rush her to the emergency room." Elena smacked my arm as my phone buzzed.

"It's _fine_! My leg is totally fine! Just a scratch." Elena assured as I read Caroline's text: _tell me everything when u get here_

"I'm… I'm glad." Stefan said awkwardly. "I, um… also wanted to return this to you." Stefan held up Elena's journal. She brightened as I clucked my tongue against the roof of my mouth.

"A jerk _and _a thief," I noted with a disapproving tone.

Stefan's eyes went wide. "No, no! I just stumbled across it!"

"Clare!" Elena hissed. "Stop being rude!" Never.

"So you read it," I eyed Stefan, who blanched.

"No!"

Elena put a hand on her forehead as if she couldn't believe I was doing this. Oh yeah, I was doing this. I was _that guy_.

"Then how did you know who it belongs to? How did you even know where we _lived_?" I turned to Elena who was staring daggering into me. "This guy is a creep! A stalker!"

"I just asked! This is a small town!" Stefan said quickly, looking ready to bolt.

"My name is on the journal," Elena snapped at me before turning to give Stefan an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry about Clare. If you read my journal, it's understandable—"

"No, I didn't. I wouldn't have," Stefan insisted quickly, his green eyes locked with Elena's. "I have a journal too, so I understand the need for privacy." _Uh huh_. I'm sure.

"Ohh, well, I see now!" I said the same time Elena swooned with a "You have a journal?"

"I… yeah," Stefan looked at me cautiously, and then to Elena, his gaze softening. "I like to write down everything before I forget, memories are important."

"You're not a creepy stalker at all, you're just gay." I nodded, flashing him a grin and Elena smacked me with her journal. Why was I always being _hit_? Whatever! "We're going to the grill to meet up with some friends, wanna come with?"

Elena's expression tilted toward surprise before she turned to look at Stefan with a hopeful smile. Stefan mirrored her surprise before getting caught up in Elena's gaze. Gross.

"Yeah, I'd like that." He smiled at her and Elena brightened.

Totally ignored over here. I was the one who suggested it, too! Where was my smiles?

"Great," Elena breathed. "Okay… I'm just gonna… put this down," she lifted the journal, sounding a little dazed, and motioned for Stefan to follow her inside. He stepped closer and paused.

I wondered what he'd do if I mentioned vampires needed to be invited inside.

I grinned at the thought.

"I'm—um. Fine." He took a step back, looking at me hesitantly. "I'm sorry if I've unintentionally offended you in any way, or given you the wrong impression about me." Aw, and he looked real earnest about it too. I smiled at him sweetly.

"If you trick, lie to, or hurt my sister in _any way_, they'll never find your body," I promised him pleasantly but Stefan merely grinned back at me, as though he were _amused_.

I wasn't freakin' kidding, I'd stake him in the face.

"That's admirable, being protective of your family." He said softly. "I like that." No, jerk, you're supposed to be frightened.

Elena returned with car keys. "Ready?" She looked between us.

"Shotgun," I skipped past Stefan, pulling out my phone to text everything to Caroline, especially the part where I told Elena I thought Stefan was gay. It was a real _LOL _moment for us.

For someone who was traumatized by cars, Elena sure had a large one. A freakin' SUV. Stefan was a real sport about letting me sit up front, but I called shotgun and I was pretty sure he was going to try to be on my good side. Which was going to be impossible. No amount of anguished vampire brooding with big sad eyes was going to make me like him.

"So are you fitting in at school?" Elena asked, kindly. "I can imagine it being really difficult, we've never had a new student and we've all known each other since Kindergarten."

I didn't know any of you fuckers.

"It's a… difficult transition, but I'm glad I'm here." Stefan said and oh boy, there goes Elena getting all doe eyed. "I'm feeling more and more accepted."

My phone buzzed and I glanced at the text from Caroline: _tyler cornered me n asked bout u_

Who the hell was Tyler and why was I supposed to care? I texted back: _what does he want_. That was neutral, right? Yeah.

Caroline's reply was immediate: _idk its weird did something happen between u 2 over the summer n u didn't tell me? ? Hes asking if ur seeing anybody_

I frowned. Shit. I texted back: _? ? ? no. super weird. Are we even friends_.

I mean, was that weird to ask? My phone buzzed with: _last time I checked no! !_

Huh. Did someone like the dream me? I hoped not. I wasn't in the mood for dream romance. Elena pulled into a parking spot and I threw the door open, eager to converse with Caroline and plot.

"See you losers in there!" I said happily, prancing into the building.

Jesus Christ. Was this the right place? I'm pretty sure I just walked into a freakin' bar. I spotted Bonnie sitting next to the anguished jock from earlier and offered a small wave that she happily returned. Skipping, I made a beeline for Caroline who was giving me an uncomfortable look, a dark haired boy standing in front of her with a pool cue in hand.

Twenty bucks says that's Tyler.

I bounced next to the blonde. "Whatcha drinking?" I asked, looking at the very alcoholic-ish looking drink. Caroline offered it to me.

"It's unsweetened raspberry ice tea." Caroline's gaze flicking to who I assumed Tyler was and then back to me. She tilted her head toward him and I took a sip of her drink, pretending that I wasn't picking up on her not-so subtle body language.

"So, Clare," Tyler said in a cheesy smooth voice, leaning against the cue, a cocky smirk on his face. I knew his type. I used to hang around his type. "Caroline tells me you're not seeing anyone."

"Being blind is no joking matter," I stared back at him flatly. I had little patience for this crap. Especially since I was _dreaming_.

"I'm gonna go say hi to Elena," Caroline chirped, snatching her drink out of my hand rudely and making her way toward Stefan, who was talking to Anguished Jock.

I've been abandoned.

"You know what I meant," Tyler tugged my attention back to him. He seemed to be trying to not appear annoyed. Good. "I'm not seeing anyone—well, nobody my mother would like me to be seen with, so I'm giving you the great opportunity to be seen with me at the Founder's party."

What the hell was that?

Didn't care.

"Nope."

"We just have to walk in together," like that was really going to make a difference.

"No." What wasn't he getting?

"You'd go by yourself?" He wondered with a scoff and I looked at him oddly. He didn't know, I could have plans to go with someone else!

"Hey you don't know, I might not even be here for the party. I might be somewhere else." Like awake. He frowned at me, opening his mouth, but I decided it was time to leave. He was a weirdo.

I made my way back to Caroline who shot me a curious look. I leaned closer to her.

"He won't take no for an answer, he wants us to be seen together at the Founder's party. He's trying to use me as arm candy," I gossiped in her ear. Caroline snorted, pulling back to raise her eyebrows. We turned, glancing at Tyler who threw us a dirty look back.

"What a loser." She giggled, rolling her eyes and motioning me to sit down. I sat between Stefan and Elena (I quickly told her what happened and she shot Tyler a dirty look). Bonnie sat on Stefan's other side and Caroline sat across from him.

"The food here is fantastic," Bonnie was saying to Stefan as I flipped through the menu curiously.

"I don't know why you even bother with the menu," Elena said with a grin. "We all know what you're going to get."

"Cheese fries," Bonnie and Caroline chorused and I threw the menu at Stefan. He caught it with an amused look while Elena gave me _the_ _look_. I ignored both of them. How did everyone know my favorite freakin' food?

"Are you guys having your usual?" A waitress asked, smiling, and Elena nodded smiling at her. Holy shit, how often did we freakin' eat here?

"Yeah. Stefan, what would you like?" She asked, turning to the vampire. Could he even eat?

"Oh. No, I'm fine. Thanks." He said with a smile.

"You know, you're basically a skeleton. You should eat more." I said to the vampire and Elena smacked my arm as the waitress laughed, walking away.

"Wow," Bonnie said with a laugh. "It looks like it's going to be another C-squared year if Clare's back to her old self again."

"C-squared?" Stefan asked, turning his attention to Bonnie. He was amused with me and that sucked! If I couldn't get Elena to not like him, it was up to me to scare him off.

"Mmhm. Clare and Care, the two C's who have no filter and just say whatever they want, whenever they want." She gave him a sympathetic look. "She might come off as insensitive but she means well."

"Nope, I just don't like you." I told him cheerfully as the waitress returned, placing drinks on the table. Pepsi! Hell yeah!

"She's been really snarky to him the entire time," Elena said to Bonnie, rolling her eyes.

"I'm confident that I can get you to change your mind." Stefan said, leaning closer to me. I liked it better when he was skittish and unnerved by me! What the hell happened? Where was this smug attitude coming from? I brought the straw to my mouth and blew the straw wrapper at him.

"You know…" Caroline said, looking toward Elena. "If your twin is so uncomfortable with Stefan, I think it might mean you should stay away from him." I sent her a grin.

"I think you two are up to something," Bonnie shook her head, smiling at Stefan. "Ignore them. Life is easier that way."

"Ouch Bonnie." I placed a hand over my chest. "You should trust my innocent judgment and Caroline's kindness by looking out for our dear Elena."

"Looking out for me?" Elena scoffed, rolling her eyes, and grinning. "Looking out for what? For making a new friend? I'm so sorry Stefan, you shouldn't have to witness their idiocy."

"It's no bother, I think it's endearing." Stefan grinned at me and then to Caroline and I could _feel _my dream best friend melt.

The waitress returned with the food and I squealed in delight as she placed the fries covered in melted cheese in front of me. Even if I was dreaming, would I still be able to taste this? I popped a cheese covered fry into my mouth and moaned happily. Oh. My. God. So delicious. Bonnie and Caroline burst into giggles as Elena put her face in her hands, clearly embarrassed.

"You have to try this," I said to Stefan, shoving the paper bowl into his personal bubble. "You have _not lived _until you've had some of this. Oh my God."

"Will you give me a chance at being your friend if I try one?" He asked with a faint grin, actually picking up a fry from my plate. Eat it, you vampire dick.

"Probably not, but oh my God, Steffy, I'm so serious. The world must know of this deliciousness. It's literally a cheesy orgasm exploding in your mouth." I told him seriously. The jerk had the audacity to nod his head and go along with it. No stop it, he's supposed to find me weird!

"I see. I guess I have no choice but to try it then…" He said with a sigh, popping it into his mouth.

"Clare, oh my God." Caroline laughed. "Why do you have to talk like that?"

"Yeah, you might scare off Stefan!" Bonnie agreed, grinning at me widely as Elena shook her head.

"I can't believe you're my twin sometimes."

"You're right, this _is _the best food I have ever tasted in all the years I've been alive." Stefan deadpanned with an approving nod.

"Oh my God, he's going with it." Bonnie snapped her fingers. "That means he's in. You're in, Stefan. Anyone who can put up with Clare is in. Welcome to the inner friendship circle." She spread her arms out, gesturing to all of us.

I pouted. No way. I didn't want Stefan in! Why was this so difficult? I guess his want to have True Love with Elena overrode everything else. I bit my lip, looking toward Caroline who was smiling faintly. At least she seemed happy with how things were going. Maybe it was because I was taking the attention away from Elena and Stefan's intense love stare.

Since I had offered the first fry, Stefan seemed to think we were now _sharing_, and snuck a few more. How freakin' dare he. This was going on The List Of Reasons Why Stefan Sucks. Fry stealer!

"So you were born in Mystic Falls?" Caroline asked, twirling her straw around in her glass, making conversation. At least now I knew what the town was called.

"Mmhm," Stefan nodded. "And moved when I was still young." Yeah I bet.

"Parents?" Bonnie asked.

"My… parents passed away." Stefan said, yeah like, I bet a hundred years ago. The table fell awkwardly quiet, Bonnie sending me and Elena looks. Oh, jeez.

"Just like Batman." I said cheerfully, being rude on purpose and Elena smacked my arm really freakin' hard. I threw her a look but Stefan laughed, instantly easing the stiff tension.

"Not really. I don't think the whole caped crusader look would be very flattering on me." Stefan flashed me a grin that I frowned at. Dude, no. Stop being cool. It was never going to happen, I was never going to like him. Especially once I wake up.

No wonder he was being kind of cool. He was a product of my own _mind_.

"Siblings?" Elena asked, changing the subject. Stefan's expression turned darkly amused.

"None that I talk to." He said shortly.

"Oh," I said lightly, glad to find a topic that bothered him. I would dive that family knife straight into his chest and twist it every chance I got. "How sad. Why don't you talk to your siblings? Family is the most important thing, Steffy. How can we feel comfortable being friends if you shun your own flesh and blood?"

"My brother and I don't see eye to eye." Stefan said after a moment. "It's… complicated. But, I'm, uh, currently living with my uncle."

"So Stefan," Caroline perked up, drawing his attention to her. She smiled at him warmly. "If you're new… then you don't know about the party tomorrow." She clasped her hands, resting her chin on them.

"It's a back to school thing at the falls," Bonnie explained pleasantly at Stefan's confused look. Stefan's gaze flickered toward Elena and I remembered this part! Stefan gets all YOU'RE MY ONE TRUE LOVE ELENA and Elena gets all blush-y and school girl-y. I remembered it so well because my roommate swooned while I desperately wished I didn't have Netflix. Good times.

"Are you guys going?" He asked lightly, tilting his head to glance at Bonnie and Caroline. Caroline smiled at him sweetly.

"Of course we are."

Stefan turned his head back to Elena, smiling at her and she smiled back. His gaze shifted in my direction and I gave him a flat stare. While I wanted him to get with Caroline, I also didn't want him messing with Elena's feelings. This was supposed to be a serious love-y moment between them, so what the fuck was he doing?

Unless… Unless he was liking Caroline more than before! I bet without me here, nobody got to have fun! It was all serious and he didn't get to see the playful side of Caroline! Why was I letting myself get so wrapped up in this? It was just a dream. A stupid dream.

"Would it be okay with you if I went?" Stefan asked teasingly, and I raised a fry, pointing it at him threateningly.

"I'm not your keeper, do what you like. If I see you, I'll probably throw something at you." I said, popping the fry into my mouth and Stefan grinned, his eyes returning to Elena.

Stefan, like the jerkoff he was, offered to pay for us. I happily accepted as Bonnie and Elena tried to talk him out of it. Caroline was on my side about this. Let the boy pay, god knows he's been hoarding all the money with his old as balls bank account. He also insisted he didn't need a ride home, because he was a vampire and could run at the speed of light.

Like the Flash.

"Why don't you like him?" Elena asked as we got back to our dream house. She followed me into my room and plopped down on the bed.

"I just don't want you getting caught up in stuff." I said, drifting toward the dresser to see what kind of pajamas I had. "Like, until you're happy with you, seeking a boyfriend isn't… you know, a good idea. It's just shifting the problem, and what happens if something happens? You're back to how you were before. Only worse."

Aha! Success! I pulled the drawer out, shifting through, looking for a pair that I wanted to wear.

"Who said anything about a boyfriend?" Elena asked, staring up at my ceiling. I glanced over at her. She was smiling. "And so what if I find him cute? I was getting a lot of mixed signals anyway. I think he might like you, instead."

Ew no! "Uh, no, he just wants my approval so he can make a move on you. I know how weird creepy stalkers work. If I hate him, he knows you'll be less likely to go for him."

"If he liked me and I liked him, I wouldn't care what you thought." Elena said as I pulled out Minnie Mouse pajama bottoms and tank top. Awesome.

"Uh huh, I'm sure. Now get out, I'm going to bed."

Elena grinned at me and slid off my bed. "Okay, okay, I'm leaving." She hovered in the doorway, her expression turning soft. "I'm just really glad you're back to being you, Clare. It's been… really difficult doing this without you, and I just… I'm glad. Okay?" Ugh, feels. I shouldn't even have feels. This is a dream.

Still, I walked over and pulled my dream twin into a hug. Elena hugged me back... After what felt like forever, she pulled away and smiled sadly.

"Night!" I said cheerfully, shoving her from the room and slamming the door. Glad that was over! Too many feels. I changed into the pajamas and frowned.

Now what?

I crawled into the unfamiliar bed. I _was _tired. Could I even sleep while dreaming? Maybe that's what would wake me up?


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Nope.

* * *

The next morning, when an unfamiliar alarm clock shrieked at me until I awoke and I found myself still in that god forsaken room, I was about to ragequit life. Was this for freakin' serious? I was still freakin' here? How. Was. This. EVEN. POSSIBLE? I rolled over and screamed angrily into the pillow. Damn it! Damn it! Damn everything!

No way!

There was no way in hell I was getting involved with any of their shitty vampire love-triangle bullshit! No. No. It wasn't happening! I had a _life_. A shitty horrible life filled with debt but it was still _mine _and this wasn't happening! I couldn't be stuck in this horrible place! I mean, it wasn't even possible!

I must be dead.

Or in a coma.

I marched across the room moodily and ripped open a door. It led to a bathroom. Convenient. Moodily, I snatched a yellow tooth brush and moodily began brushing my teeth. The other door opened and Elena stepped in, looking half awake.

"Mornin'," she murmured sleepily, picking up the other toothbrush. I ignored her angrily. She shouldn't even fucking exist. With a now cleaned mouth, I sauntered back into what was now apparently _my _room.

This royally sucked ass.

Maybe eventually if Bonnie got her witch groove on I could subtly see if there was a spell to send me back.

"Hey, um…" Elena crept into my room, and I turned. She was looking anxious. "Yesterday wasn't a fluke, right? You're back to being you? You seemed…" she took a deep breath. "Really angry just then, like how it was before… and I know you haven't forgiven me, but I really appreciated the way you were yesterday and I…"

"Elena," I snapped silencing her. "It's fine. We're cool. I just woke up on the wrong side of the bed." Forgiven her for _what_? What the hell was she talking about?

"…You only have one side to roll off of." She said in a tiny voice cracking my mood. My lips sprang upward into a grin.

"Get out, I'm gonna get dressed." I said, snatching a pillow off the bed and throwing it at her. She smiled back, looking relieved. My phone buzzed on the vanity dresser and I walked over to it as Elena left the room through the joint bathroom.

Carolina: _gonna b at ur house in 15 b ready_

I groaned. Whatever. Fifteen minutes was plenty of time. I threw on a cute white T-Shirt with Minnie Mouse's bow on it and faded blue jeans, brushed my hair and grabbed my messenger bag, skipping down the steps.

"I made waffles!" Jenna announced as I pranced into the kitchen, ruffling Jeremy's hair as I skipped past him. He grunted, swatting at my hand as he smoothed down his hair.

"Excellent," I snatched a waffle from the plate. "You are the bomb, Aunt Jenna." It was weird calling her that but she smiled at me brightly.

"Being the bomb is good, right?" She asked teasingly. "Thank God, I have finally ascended to being the bomb."

"Hey punk, you gonna eat some waffles?" I called to the moody teen. He reached his arm out and snatched the one I was holding, smirking. Rude!

"Thanks, Clare." He said sarcastically, slinging his backpack over his shoulder and leaving the kitchen just as Elena walked in. She opened her mouth but he grunted at her, so she closed it, raising her eyebrows.

"Waffles?" She asked, as I took another one. "Awesome."

"Yup. That's me. The awesome bomb." Jenna said with a grin. "How was the grill?"

"Good. Clare potentially scared off Stefan." Elena said, tilting her dark eyes in my direction. I bit into the waffle.

"Cute guy who swung by last night? I saw him." Jenna said with a mischievous grin. "If he likes you, he should work for it. Good job, Clare."

My phone buzzed in my pocket and I pulled it out. Caroline was outside waiting. "See you at school." I said cheerfully and Elena furrowed her brow. "I'm hitching a ride with Care." I explained as I pranced out of the kitchen.

"What did Elena say about Stefan?" Caroline asked as I slid into the passenger seat.

"Good morning," I greeted back, with an amused grin. "She wanted to know why I didn't like him. I gave her the speech. Like, she shouldn't date right now. She needs to be okay with herself before she gets a boyfriend." Sympathy rushed across Caroline's face.

"Well, that _is _true… You guys have had such a hard time…" she turned her head in my direction, biting on her lower lip. "Are you… okay? I know you guys haven't been talking to each other since the accident. Do you still blame her? I mean, it kind of was her fault—okay, that came out wrong, but you know what I mean. At least, I know where you were coming from. If I was at a party and asked my mom to come pick me up and then she got into a car crash, I'd blame myself too."

Huh.

Okay.

So that's what happened. Elena was at a party, asked her parents to pick her up, they died in a car crash, and I must have blamed her for that. I guess that's where all the anger they were talking about was coming from. Ugh, drama and it's only the second day of this stupid dream life that might not be a dream.

"Things are gonna go back to how they were, Care. I did a lot of… soul searching." I said, with a small shrug. "I'm sorry I didn't include you, but things are better now."

"So what did she say when you gave her the speech?" Caroline switched the topic, looking curious. I laughed.

"She said that there was no boyfriend, he was just cute. She also thought he liked me, which is just ridiculous."

Caroline nodded. "Yeah you were a real bitch to him, I don't think you're his type at all." She agreed and I grinned at her. Okay, I knew for a fact that we were going to be great friends. I liked how bluntly she talked to me. "But this might work to our benefit! If she thinks _you _like him, she'll back off!"

"But what if none of this works and they get together?" I asked and she slumped her shoulders.

"Then nothing, I guess. I mean, it wouldn't be the _worst _thing in the world." Caroline sighed, flipping her hair over her shoulder as she pulled into a parking space. "And if he doesn't want me, then he's a loser not worth my time."

I nodded. "So true."

I followed Caroline to her locker as we chatted about non-Stefan related things, and she filled me in on some of the stuff I missed during the summer, and the rumors circling the new school year about this person and that person and anything that could possibly have happened on the first day of school.

"Hey Caroline," Tyler greeted, leaning against the lockers next to hers. She gave him a look. "Clare," he turned to me, his fingers wrapping around my arm. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

I turned to look at Caroline and she rolled her eyes, giving me a tiny nod, and I turned back to Tyler who was dragging me further away from her. "What's up?"

"Look, I'll get you whatever you want if you just go with me. It'll be a two second thing. My mother just has to see us together."

Goddamn. "I said no. What makes you think I'm going to agree just because you're changing what you'd give me in exchange? I'm not an escort service." I said flatly, pulling my arm from him. He sighed, frustrated.

"Everyone is a whore in the end, I just have to name the right price." He frowned as I stared at him. Um, _what_? "Okay that came out wrong, but you get what I mean. You help me, I help you."

"Why me?" I asked, perplexed.

"Because my mother likes the Gilberts, thinks your family is, you know, good. Respectable. And I can't ask Elena, Matt's my best friend, so that's weird." Matt must be the Anguish Jock. "That leaves you."

Thanks. "There's one more Gilbert. You could ask Jeremy."

He glowered at me.

"Okay, fine. But you better hold up your end of the bargain. I don't know what I want yet, but when I do…" I trailed off and he smirked at me.

"Great. I'll get your number from Matt and text you later."

What a freak. But he said two seconds, and I might need an awesome favor in the future.

"What the hell was that?" Caroline asked as I walked back to her, shaking my head.

"Desperation. He wants to please his mommy." I said with a light shrug.

"Hey."

I jumped and turned around, finding Stefan behind me. He smiled, obviously amused.

"Sorry." I'm sure he wasn't.

"Oh! Hi, Stefan." Caroline beamed up at him.

"Yeah, hi, burger tits." I greeted flatly and Stefan blinked.

"Burger tits?" He repeated, staring at me as though he didn't know what to make of it. I hope it forever bothered him. He glanced at Caroline and then around at the students passing. "Where is Bonnie and Elena?"

"Doing their usual Dunkin Donuts run, probably." Caroline said and I felt a betrayed stab of shock. I wanted Dunkin Donuts, what the hell!

"Or doing a satanic ritual. It could go either way. You never know." Since Elena wasn't here with us, I fully expected him to bugger off and go bother some other people.

"Do you want to walk me to my first period class?" Caroline asked cheerfully, batting her eyelashes up at Stefan.

"Uh—sure." He smiled back at her, and she gave a little squeal of delight, grasping my arm so she was between us.

Caroline's class was in the complete opposite direction as mine! Puffing my cheeks out with a pout, I slumped with her. Caroline chatted to him about everything and anything under the sun and Stefan, surprisingly, listened and politely commented on everything when he was supposed to. What a great guy.

Only not.

Boo, he still sucks.

"Thanks for walking me to class, Stefan." Caroline said with a smile, holding her books to her chest. She turned and mouthed _sorry_ to me, but I doubted she was sorry at all.

"It was no problem, Caroline." Stefan said with a soft smile, and turned. "Shall we, Miss Gilbert?"

"I will stab you in the face with a stick," I told him as we began our way back to the other side of the school.

"Ouch," he grimaced. "Not a morning person?"

"Not a Stefan person." I told him with a matter-of-fact look, tilting my head to give him my sassiest expression.

"What can I do to get you to like me?" He asked and I already knew I never, ever, was going to like him.

Ever.

"You could strip down and run around naked." Maybe that would make me like him a little bit. I mean, that would be the funniest thing _ever_. He laughed warmly, green eyes dancing with amusement. He wouldn't be so amused if I punched him in the dick. "Listen, seriously, you don't have to get me to like you to date Elena. She's not someone who'd let someone else's feelings influence hers."

Stefan's smile slid off his face, eyes widening with surprise before he furrowed his eyebrows. "Wait, Clare, that's not what I'm doing, I honestly want to be your friend." He said quickly. "And I think your opinion and how you feel would greatly effect Elena—you two are close like that, and it's nice, but I—"

"Hey guys," Bonnie said warmly, walking over to us and I grinned at her, glad to have an excuse to get away from Stefan. Elena glanced at me, and then to Stefan.

"Did you get Dunkin Donuts without me?" I asked, feigning hurt and Bonnie threw me a strange look.

"You know today is when we do our weekly Dunkin run, Clare." She said as Elena gave a small wave to Stefan, before linking arms with me and pulling us further down the hall. "So you and Stefan were walking to class together, huh?" Bonnie rose her eyebrows at me. "I thought you didn't like him."

"I don't," I sighed. "But he walked Care to class and I just followed. But anyway. So Tyler cornered me, and basically talked me into going to the, um, Founder's with him. Just so his mom can see us together, or something."

"What the hell?" Elena made a face, looking annoyed. "Who does that dick think he is?"

"The King of Dickery," I shrugged. "I dunno, but it's whatever."

"I don't even know what Matt sees in him. He's such an ass." Bonnie agreed. "Let's hope the next step isn't him asking to get married." I laughed.

"Just walk down the aisle and be seen getting married with me," Elena said in a low pitched voice, mocking him. "It's what my mother wants."

I laughed even harder as we walked into history. Legit, couldn't wait for another day of boring, boring history. I took a seat in front of Elena and began doodling. Life could suck it, I didn't care. The teacher, Mr. Tanner, droned on and on about the fictional town and its importance and I just wished I could float away.

"Um, a lot?" I heard Bonnie say, pulling me back to the here and now. "I'm not sure. Like, a whole lot?"

I snorted. Way to go, Bonnie. Rebel against the man.

"Cute becomes dumb in an instant, Ms. Bennett." Mr. Tanner said sarcastically, annoyance dripping from his tone and I frowned at him. Whoa. Someone was on their man-period today. Seriously, talk about moody!

I turned around, shooting Bonnie a comforting smile and she gave a half-hearted one back.

"Mr. Donovan," Mr. Tanner drawled. "Would you like to take this opportunity to overcome your embedded jock stereotype?"

"It's okay, Mr. Tanner, I'm cool with it." Matt, the Anguish Jock, said cheerfully causing some chuckles.

Mr. Tanner gave a sarcastic little laugh. "Hmmm… Elena?" He tilted his head in our direction. "Surely you can enlighten us about one of the town's most significantly historical events?"

"We were overrun by vampires?" I perked up, speaking for Elena who, if I remember correctly, had no idea. I didn't really remember what Stefan said either, as I had been trying to hang myself with my blanket at that point. I threw the vampire thing in there as a clear jab to Stefan. Suck it.

Mr. Tanner tossed me a look. "Hilarious, Clarissa, but you two are fraternal twins, I _can _tell the difference between you and I don't appreciate your mockery. Now, _Elena_, answer the question."

"I'm sorry, I… I don't know." Elena said quietly behind me.

Mr. Tanner looked thoroughly annoyed. "I was willing to be lenient last year for obvious reasons, Gilberts. But the personal excuses ended with summer break."

Wow.

What a fucking tool.

Excuse us if we're upset our _parents _have died. Wow. Just freakin' wow.

"There were three hundred and forty-six casualties, unless you're counting local civilians." Stefan spoke up, a hint of annoyance laced in his tone. Yeah that wasn't fair. He was freakin' there for all that.

Mr. Tanner stared at him with a surprised, yet still annoyed, look. "That's correct." A half smile crept across his face. "Mister…?"

"Salvatore."

"Salvatore. Any relation to the original settlers here at Mystic Falls?" He was sounding giddy now. I bet Mr. Tanner got off on history related things.

Stefan hesitated. "Distant." He said shortly and I almost snorted. Yeah. _Okay_.

"Well, very good." Mr. Tanner turned, smugly saying: "Except, of course, there were no civilian casualties in this battle."

"Actually, there were, uh… twenty-seven, _sir_." Oh jeez. "Confederate soldiers, they fired on the church believing it to be housing weapons. They were wrong. It was a night of great loss." Oh Stefan, you say it like it happened yesterday.

Maybe it was yesterday.

Maybe he was a time travelling vampire.

"The founder's archives are, uh, stored in Civil Hall if you'd like to _brush up _on your facts. Mr. Tanner."

Shut. Down. Wow. Mr. Tanner is going to need some disinfectant for that burn. Like seriously.

The rest of class went on without Mr. Tanner picking on anyone demanding answers and when the bell rang, Elena and Bonnie were buzzing with the show down between teacher and student.

"I can't believe he did that!" Bonnie said excitedly, grinning widely. "Nobody has ever put Mr. Tanner in his place. That was _awesome_!"

"I know!"

"What happened?" Caroline asked, falling into step with us, looking curious. Elena and Bonnie launched into a dramatic retelling of the events that took place twenty minutes ago.

"So that vampire comment."

I nearly leap out of skin, turning around to give Stefan a glower. "Dude!" He gave an apologetic half smile.

"I could give Batman a run for his money, my disappearing and reappearing acts can't be compared." He said smoothly and I fought a smile. "But, ah… that vampire comment. You really think there were vampires?"

"Yeah, as much as I believe the toothfairy comes to take teeth and give cash in its place." I would prove that the toothfairy existed one of these days! I was secretly pleased he was bothered by it enough that he came to seek me out. He nodded, looking relieved. God could he be any more obvious? "Why? You got a secret, Steffy? An obsession for the blood suckers?" I decided, what the hell, let's make this as uncomfortable as possible for him.

"Are you harassing Stefan?" Caroline asked, hands on her hips. I smiled innocently. "Come walk us to our class, Stefan."

"Oh come on, Caroline, don't make him do that." Bonnie said with a shake of her head. "Run, Stefan. Be free."

School was boring as ever, and Caroline snatched me up so we could _get ready _for the big party. I texted Elena to let her know she had to pick us up as Caroline didn't want to have to worry about driving.

I'm pretty sure that meant there was going to be booze at the party.

I sat on her bed, grinning as she shifted through possible outfits.

"I just can't believe how you could be such a bitch to Stefan," she was saying, and turned her head to give me a grin. "I mean, I love it, but he's so hot."

"He has a broody look to him, I bet he's boring as hell, Care. You deserve someone better than him." I said, sprawling out on her bed. She pulled out a blouse and I shook my head. "Not cute enough."

She nodded, and put it back in her closet. "I don't care, he's hot! And I just don't want to lose to Elena." She sighed. "She always gets everything."

"Yeah but Stefan is just… so blah. You need a guy who'll crawl through your window just to say hello or give you cheesy mix tapes about his undying devotion. Stefan just comes off as stiff and filled with angst. He's an emotional whirlpool."

Caroline snorted and pulled out another top. I nodded and she threw it down on her bed as a possibility. "I doubt that's ever going to happen."

"I think it will. Have faith."

"I'm still going to try with Stefan." She said in a deciding sort of tone and I dropped it. I had a feeling there was no changing her mind.

"And I will help you the best I can." I vowed dramatically and she rolled her eyes, grinning. By the time she picked out her outfit, and encouraged me to borrow a cute top, Bonnie was texting us to come outside.

I wondered where Caroline's mom was and why the parents here were so cool with their kids going to parties or hanging out at an obvious bar. Weird. The sun was setting and I was glad Caroline had insisted I bring a grey hoodie with an adorable Minnie Mouse on the front. Apparently it was mine that I left at her house. Good. Cause if it wasn't mine, she wouldn't ever get it back anyway.

"You guys ready?" Bonnie asked as Caroline and I slid into the backseats.

"Yup. You think Stefan is going to show up?" Caroline wondered with a hopeful sigh and I grinned at her.

"He's a weirdo stalker, so of course."

"Oh shut up, Clare, he's not a weirdo stalker." Elena said with a grin, looking back at me.

"Oh, Telephone is playing! Turn it up, Lena!" Caroline suddenly said and Elena leaned forward blasting the song. Caroline and I swayed to the beat.

"Boy, the way you blowin' up my phone you won't make me leave no faster!" Caroline and I sang loudly to the lyrics as Bonnie chime in. "Put my coat on faster, leave my girls faster! I should of left my phone at home 'cause this is a disaster!" Elena sang with us, laughing. "Callin' me like a collector, sorry I cannot answer!"

We sang loudly to all the random songs on the radio, which got me kind of hyped up and excited for this party. In my old life, I had been too busy juggling school and jobs to have much time for friends, and before that I had been crazy about grades and preparing for my future. Having fun like this was _amazing_.

Bonnie parked and I excitedly got out of the car, linking arms with Caroline who was bouncing on her feet, giddily. Bonnie and Elena led us down a wooden path lined with a log fence. Teenagers were scattered everywhere in groups, or making out, and there was a large wooden gazebo thing, lights hanging from trees, and a fire that groups of teens sat and stood around. I'd never, ever been to a party before and I was overwhelmed with excitement.

"Come on, I'm gonna get a drink," Caroline said happily, grabbing my hand and pulling me away from Elena and Bonnie who waved goodbye with amused looks. "I know you don't drink, or has that changed?" She looked back at me and I laughed.

"Nope, still the same." I wasn't going to experiment getting drunk for the first time in public. If I got sick, it would royally blow.

"Great, you can make sure I don't make a fool out of myself." Caroline said happily, stopping by a large cooler with beers in it. My phone buzzed in my pocket and I pulled it out.

_I see you_ the text read. What the hell? Another text came in. _Turn around idiot_.

I turned, finding Tyler smirking behind me with a beer bottle in hand. I puffed out a relieved sigh, giving him a half amused, half annoyed look.

"Dude, you scared me to death. I thought a creepy stalker was going to kill me." I said and he rolled his eyes at me.

"You're such an idiot," he said which pleased me. Good. Be seen with someone you consider an idiot. The whole two seconds we're going to be seen together I was going to make it hell for him. He then did something surprising, he held his beer bottle out.

"Nah, I'm good." I said and he nodded his head.

"Right. Okay. Well." He was getting drunk-awkward on me. "Just wanted to let you know I have your number."

"Ew, go away Tyler," Caroline said, giving him a look and he growled.

"I was just leaving." He snapped back, turning and disappearing in the crowd.

"What did that loser want? Why does he keep popping up? Oh my God, does he _like _you?" I wondered if she was somehow drunk already. I laughed.

"Trust me, he doesn't like me."

"Oh, there's Stefan!" Caroline squealed, grabbing my hand. Noooo! "Hey!" She bounced in front of him, seemingly taking him by surprise. He looked down at her, and then to me. "You made it!"

"Hey Caroline. And yeah. I did," he said shortly in the kind of way that made me feel he didn't want to talk to us. "Hello, Clare. Not going to throw anything at me?"

I made a face at him.

"Let's get you a drink!" Caroline said playfully and Stefan hesitated. He glanced back to me and I glowered. Go. Away. He was ruining my cheerful party mood.

"Well, I…" He glanced back to Caroline, clearly feeling uncomfortable. Good.

"Oh, come on," Caroline grinned, grabbing his arm with her other hand and leading him toward the cooler.

Feeling moody, I pulled out my phone and decided to harass Tyler. _How do you make an unwanted person go away?_

I waited a few minutes, annoyed he was taking so long. Was he ignoring me? I was so used to Caroline's instant replies. My phone buzzed: _is this bout me?_

I snorted and replied: _No, it's about Stefan. I don't like him and I want him to fuck off_.

His reply was a little faster: _tell him to fuck off._

I rolled my eyes: _I did. I even told him I didn't like him. He won't leave_.

"I'm really… not a big drinker, actually," Stefan was saying, smiling politely at Caroline who pouted. "Um, but I can… have fun… you know, without drinking."

My phone buzzed: _hold on_. Hold on? That's not a reply I was looking for. You can't BRB someone in a text!

"Oh come on, Stefan! Loosen up a little!" Caroline giggled, opening another beer for herself. "Don't be like Clare, she never drinks either!" Stefan's gaze shifted in my direction.

"Why is that?" He asked and I frowned. None of his business!

Tyler appeared by my side, giving Stefan a look. "I think you need to fuck off, man. You're bothering these girls." I gaped at Tyler, stunned. Oh. My. God. He just got so much cooler!

A look of irritation flashed across Stefan's face and he turned his head in my direction, then back to Tyler. Caroline whined.

"Get lost Tyler, that isn't true!" She said with a pout. "Right Clare? We like Stefan!"

"What's your problem?" Stefan asked and Tyler scoffed.

"You are. So beat it."

"I see." Stefan's gaze flickered past us, and he turned to Caroline. "Excuse me." He brushed past me and I sighed with relief just as Caroline threw me a look and stomped away.

I turned to Tyler, grinning faintly. "Thanks, that was super cool." He shrugged a shoulder upward.

"You helped me, I helped you. We're even." He said and I nodded. That was fair. Tyler glanced at someone from over his shoulder. "So. Later."

"Not really," I shrugged, turning to follow after Caroline who was pouting some feet away. "C'mon Care, forget about him. I _told _you he was a bore."

"I bet he's just shy." Caroline said, looking over toward the fire. "And now he's with Elena."

"They're probably going to brood together about death." I said with a small smile, bumping my shoulder against hers. "Let's go dance."

"Okay." Caroline agreed with a small pout.

"Hey guys," Bonnie said warmly, coming up to us with a red plastic cup in hand. "Have you seen Elena?"

"She's with Stefan," Caroline said moodily. "They're probably kissing somewhere." I gagged, making Caroline smile a little.

"Gross. I don't understand what anyone can see in that guy." I said with a frown as we walked over to the log fence that overlooked the water. I spotted Elena on the bridge with Stefan and grimaced. Great.

"It looks so romantic," Caroline said wistfully and I shook my head.

"You really don't like the guy," Bonnie observed with a small, amused, grin.

"He hasn't given me a reason to like him. He has the tortured brood look going on. Other than that, I know nothing about him." Except, you know, the whole vampire thing.

"Hey," Matt, the Anguished Jock, said, coming to stand by us. "Have you guys seen Tyler?" He looked at me curiously suddenly. "And, uh… what's going on between you guys? He asked for your number. I hope you don't mind I gave it to him." I smiled at him faintly.

"Nah it's chill. He just needs my number so we can coordinate for the Founder's dance thing." I explained and he raised his eyebrows.

"You guys are going together? I thought he was… kind of with my sister."

"Your sister is with _everyone_." Caroline said distastefully and Matt shot her a look. "What? It's _true_!" I grinned, amused. Nice, Caroline.

"C'mon Matt," Bonnie sighed as Matt's gaze drifted toward Elena and Stefan being losers on the bridge. "Don't torture yourself."

"I'm not… I just… hope he's a good guy," Matt's expression twisted and Bonnie lightly grabbed his arm.

"Come on, let's go get another drink." She suggested cheerfully and I nodded, linking arms with Caroline who was looking at Stefan and Elena.

"Yeah, we can go dance finally," I agree as my phone buzzed. I pulled my phone out, seeing that same number. I should really add Tyler to my contacts.

_Yur borter cokblokcd me_, the text said and it was obvious that Tyler was a hell of a lot more drunk. I squinted at the screen, trying to decipher his message. I'm pretty sure he just said 'your brother cockblocked me'. Jesus Christ why was he telling me this? Way too much information. But at the same time it was kind of amusing.

I texted back: _he waffle-blocked me this morning. It's unforgivable_. I pocketed my phone as Caroline led me to the wooden gazebo where the music was louder. She nodded her head to the beat. I had no idea where Bonnie or Matt went to.

"Guys just suck," Caroline whined, with a pout. "It's not fair. I mean, aren't I gorgeous?"

"The fairest girl in all the land," I agreed as my phone buzzed again in my pocket. Tyler's drunk text: _waht yuuo'er a ddork smetimees clare its kinndda funny_. I had no idea what the text said. Something about being funny? How drunk was he?

_Cool we can be best friends_, I texted back, not really sure what to say. Carolina whined.

"Who are you texting? Listen to me!" She brightened suddenly, putting a beer bottle I didn't see her grab down. "Oh it's Stefan! Come with me, I don't want to be alone!"

"Okay," I agreed as she pranced out of the gazebo. I added Tyler as Asshole in my contacts.

"Have you been to the falls yet?" I heard Caroline ask as I approached the two, looking down at my phone as it vibrated. Sure, now Tyler replies like in two seconds. "Because they are _reaaally _cool at night. And I can show you. If you want."

I flipped open the phone, reading his drunken text: _wyh is steffen borthering yu agen he is scuh a dik_

"I think you've had too much to drink." Stefan said softly.

I'm pretty sure the text said something about Stefan being a dick and I grinned, texting: _I know. We can tell everyone he's a witch and the whole village will come after him with pitchforks and torches_.

"Well, of course I have." Caroline giggled and red flags went off, my head snapping up. Oh God, I needed to get her away from Stefan! She was possibly about to make a fool out of herself! I nudged her.

"Care, let's go back to the fire," I said but she shrugged my arm off.

"Caroline," Stefan interrupted stiffly. "You and me, it's never gonna happen. Sorry." I stared at him in disbelief. That was fucking harsh! He moved to brush past us and I grabbed his arm. He turned, giving me a look.

"You need to apologize with more sincerity than that. That was harsh, Stefan, and cold." I said angrily.

"Now you know how it feels." My mouth dropped in surprise. _Excuse me_? This guy was a fucking dick! Anger flashed.

"I made myself clear in the beginning that I don't like you," I snapped. "I'm not leading you on or acting friendly! If you're pissed at me, fine! But you don't take your anger out on my best fucking friend!"

"Clare—I _wasn't_. I'm being honest, too, and if you interpret that as being mean, then you should take a good look at yourself. You haven't exactly been kind." He said lowly, pulling me closer.

"Clare, don't, it's okay." Caroline said, grasping my arm. "It's okay. Really."

"I haven't given you a reason to dislike me," Stefan continued softly and I glared at him, still pissed that he rejected Caroline so bluntly.

"You haven't given me a reason to like you." I countered.

"Clare, what the hell?" Elena cried, marching over to me. "What's going on?" She glanced from me, to Caroline, and then to Stefan's hand on my arm. He immediately dropped it and I stepped away from him.

"He's a dick, Elena! I don't want you liking a dick!" I said angrily and she flushed.

"He's not a dick," Caroline said quickly, trying to pull me away. "It's fine. I'm drunk and he was being honest and I respect that. It's fine, Clare, I promise. You don't have to do this. I'm okay."

"I'm sorry, Caroline, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings." Stefan said quietly and Caroline nodded. His gaze turned to me and I put my hands on my hips. "Please don't be upset with me, Clare."

"It's Clarissa to you." I snapped, and the tiniest bit of guilt swarmed as hurt flickered across his face.

"Clare, come on…" Elena said softly when she turned her head, furrowing her brows. "God, you have to be kidding me. Clare," her gaze flickered to me. "It's Jeremy. He's drunkenly stumbling into the woods."

I turned to Stefan. "Be nice." I said, following after Elena who called out Jeremy's name. My phone buzzed in my pocket but I knew if I glanced at it I'd end up falling on my butt.

But then, there's the curiosity.

I flipped my phone open, reading the text from Tyler: _lol yuor relly funnny._ I snorted, grinning in amusement.

_Hell yeah I am_ I texted back, snapping my phone shut and looking up.

Elena wasn't anywhere in sight and I realized I was standing in the woods, alone.

Like really alone.

Like I didn't see Elena at _all_.

Wonderful.

Being alone in the woods during a party meant I was probably going to die. I walked further, feeling on edge. "You're walking in the woods," I said quietly to myself. "There's no one around and your phone is dead. Out of the corner your eye you spot him." I broke into a whisper: "_Shia LaBeouf_." I giggled to myself, feeling a little better and sang louder. "He's following you, about thirty feet back. He gets down on all fours and breaks into a sprint. He's gaining on you! Shia LaBeouf!"

"Claaaaary," a singsong voice drawled and I nearly tripped on a root, my heart thudding in my chest loudly. I whirled around. Damon was standing some feet away and he wiggled his fingers at me in greeting. Oh, god! Killer vampire and I'm alone in the woods!

"Why does everyone here have freaky Batman stealth abilities?" I said, surprised to see him. Was I going to die now? A beat later I realized what he called me. "Clary?" I questioned. That was a new one, nobody ever called me that before.

"Mmm. Clare is so… flat, and Clarissa is just so _proper_. But Clary… that's bubbl_y_, and bounc_y_. You're just so…Clar_y_." Damon said, clasping his hands behind his back, slowly coming closer. I found myself grinning.

"I like it. Thanks." I tilted my head. "So, crashing a teenaged drinking party out in the creepy woods, huh?"

"There's always a killer hiding at these things," Damon said with a smirk, rolling his piercing blue eyes playfully. I snorted. "You've seen Scream, right?" My lips flew into a larger grin.

"Somehow you running around in a black cloak and mask doesn't suit you. You're more the charming stranger who lures girls into the woods. Are you going to kill me today, D?"

He shook his head, stepping even closer so he was now in front of me. "Not today, but maybe soon. Who knows?" Damon said cheerfully. "For a teenaged drinking party you sure aren't playing the part of drunk lost girl in the woods. _You _are not drunk. Points off, Clary." He tsked and I flashed him an amused grin.

"Please, I'm way too much fun sober." I shifted a shoulder upward. "Plus I can convince drunk people to make terrible life choices. It's a hobby." His blue eyes seemed to twinkle with a mischievous glint. Even in the darkness of the woods, I could see it.

"Somebody help!" I heard Elena's voice, taking my attention away from Damon. I frowned, worried.

"That's my cue to…" I trailed off, turning back around, realizing I was alone. "Go." Stupid vampires and their ability to disappear. That's not creepy or anything! I hurried back to the party just as Elena and Jeremy, who was carrying someone, appeared. Holy freakin' shit! I felt worried and a little scared. What the hell _happened_?

"Vicki? Vicki! What the hell?" Matt cried, panicked, rushing over to Elena and Jeremy. I found Caroline who stared at me with wide eyes. "What happened to her? Somebody call an ambulance!"

I couldn't believe this was happening, and I vaguely remembered this from the show. It was a hell of a lot more terrifying to witness in real life.

She must've been the girl Tyler was kind of seeing because he rushed over as well.

"Everybody back up! Give her some space!" Tyler snapped, shoving away peering drunk teens. Bonnie hurried over to us, looking frightened and we huddled together.

"What do you think happened?" Caroline whispered, shivering. What was the excuse that was being used?

"Animal attack?" I whispered, having no idea what the appropriate response would be. Damon's definitely on the naughty list this year.

"It's her neck! Something bit her! She's losing a lot of blood!" Elena shouted, sounding close to tears. Yeah, a vampire somebody. Stupid vampire dickery.

Most of the party dispersed as soon as someone called the ambulance. Well, who wanted to stick around when the cops showed? Everybody was freakin' underage. Soon the area was filled with flashing police lights, an ambulance that put Vicki on a stretcher and animal control. I stood by Elena, comfortingly, not sure what else to do as Matt hopped into the ambulance.

"Hey," Bonnie said quietly, appearing. "We're gonna go to Mainline Coffee, to sober up." She said and Elena nodded slowly. Bonnie glanced at me. "Clare, Caroline is asking for you."

"Okay." I stood, giving Elena a glance. She nodded and I left to go over to my blonde friend who was hugging herself. "Hey Care." I greeted quietly and she looked up at me.

"This is so creepy," She said unhappily. "Total buzz kill. Plus my mom is totally going to know I was drinking at a party." I smiled at her faintly. "But… um, thanks for having my back, before."

"We're BFFs, of course I'm gonna have your back, Care."

"You guys ready?" Bonnie asked quietly and I frowned, looking for Elena. "She's going to use Matt's truck to bring Jeremy home." Bonnie explained, knowing what I was going to ask. I nodded, wondering if I should have gone with her. You know, for emotional support.

The car ride to the coffee shop was a silent one, a total opposite to how it was on the way to the party. It totally sucked. We had been so _happy _before. Way to ruin things, Damon, you vampire bitch. Bonnie parked in front of a little shop and I helped Caroline out of the car. She stumbled a few times, but I was certain we made it seem like she wasn't drunk.

Bonnie picked a spot away from other people, and I sat down beside Caroline who put her hands on either side of her head, groaning. Bonnie returned with drinks.

"Are you sober yet?" She asked after some time passed.

Caroline looked up. "No," she whispered, burying her face in her hands. I rubbed her back, comfortingly.

"Keep drinking, I gotta get you home," Bonnie said with a small, sympathetic, smile. She raised her mug to her lips. "I gotta get Clare home. I gotta get _me_ home."

Caroline dropped her hands. "Why didn't he go for me?" She blurted out, miserably. "The guys I want never want me."

"He's a tool, Care. He's not worth you being upset over him." I said quietly.

"Elena doesn't even try…" Caroline continued. "He just picks her. She's always the one that everyone always picks. For everything."

"That's not true. She's my twin, and I still pick hanging out with you and taking your side." I said, and Caroline leaned her head against my shoulder.

"But you're not a boy…"

"It's not a competition, Caroline," Bonnie assured quietly and Caroline sighed.

"Yes it is…" she said quietly, her head still on my shoulder.

We sat in silence for a bit until Bonnie announced she had to use the restroom. She stood up, briskly walking away and I started. Damon was sitting at the next table, a sarcastic grin fluttering across his face as he wiggled his fingers at me. Caroline lifted her head to stare, and then turned her head to stare at _me_ with a baffled look.

"We meet again, Clary. Funny how I keep bumping into you," Damon said with mock friendliness, his head tilted to the side. He squinted his piercing eyes at me. "Must be fate." More like his bloodlust to murder me.

"You know this guy? Why didn't you _tell _me? He's hot!" Caroline was still obviously drunk, and a little loud. I snorted.

"I did tell you. He's the serial killer." I said with a shrug and Damon threw a pout in my direction.

"Claaaary," he whined. "That's supposed to be _our_ little secret." He winked playfully at Caroline and I sighed, theatrically.

"Sorry, D, I just couldn't help but flaunt our relationship. It's special. I'm your favorite soon-to-be dead victim." I gestured to myself. "You can't resist this."

"Alright, you guys ready?" Bonnie asked, coming over to us and Caroline gave a soft groan.

"No, everyone gets attention from hot guys but me." She whined sadly as I helped her out of her seat. Bonnie grinned at me, amused. I glanced back to where Damon was sitting and gave him a tiny wave.

_See you soon_, he mouthed.

_Can't wait_, I mouthed back, turning to follow Bonnie out of the shop. Playing friends with asshole brother vampire was _fun_.

I was the first stop, and I waved goodbye to Bonnie and Caroline who was half asleep in the passenger's seat.

"Clarissa."

I nearly fell face first into the door and turned around, finding an awkward looking Stefan standing a few feet away. Damn these stupid vampires!

"Can we… talk, for a moment?" He asked, coming closer and I pulled my lower lip into my mouth, chewing on it. Ugh. Tortured vampire pouty stare making me feel like I needed to be less of an ass to him.

"Look, I'm sorry I was such a bitch. You can continue calling me Clare." I said with a sigh, watching as the tension faded away from his face. "I'm just protective and I don't get you. What do you _want _Stefan?"

He stared at me for a while. "I'm… not sure." He confessed after a moment and I rolled my eyes, turning the knob to the door.

"Well, I guess you can come in." Vampires and their angst tendencies, Christ it was exhausting. "You want to talk to Elena, yeah?"

"If that's alright with you…" Stefan said quietly and I gave him a look as he hesitantly entered the house.

"Elena!" I shouted. "Your boyfriend is here! Well, I'm going to bed. Don't do that gross sex stuff because, ew, I won't be able to sleep."

Stefan turned pink. "C-Clare, no, it's not like—I wouldn't—um…" He trailed off, his gaze flickering toward Elena who was giving me a weird look.

"Night, losers."

I pranced into my room and shut the door, pulling out my cellphone and scrolling through my contacts and frowned, remembering Caroline was drunk. I sent her a text instead: _have a lot to tell you. Hope you're okay!_

There was a soft knock at my door and I sighed. "What?" I called, moodily plopping down on the bed. The door creaked open and Jeremy stuck his head in, looking awkward. I sat up. "Hey, J."

"Hey Clare… Um, I was wondering… you wanna play some Left 4 Dead with me for a bit?" He asked awkwardly, running his fingers through his hair. "Like we used to?"

"Sounds like a blast." I grinned, bouncing off the bed. He gave a small hesitant smile and I followed him out of the room and down the hall.

Jeremy's room was kickass and I plopped down on the floor next to his fluffy gaming chair. We were silent for a while, just playing the game—which, by the way, I totally sucked at. But apparently that was fine, and I was a useful medic.

"It's just so difficult trying to talk to Elena or Aunt Jenna," Jeremy said as we reached the safe house. "They don't get it. They're so… willing to just move on and be happy, and it's like I just can't…"

"Nobody is rushing you," I said, following his character into the next area. "You don't have to feel like you're expected to wake up one morning and be fine with everything. It's only been four months."

"Don't get me wrong, I'm glad you're back to your old self again, C. But at least you never put up a front. At least you've been honest about your feelings. I mean, I never blamed Elena, but she just acts like we should pretend to be fine for everyone else's benefit and I think that's bullshit. Shit a witch. Be careful."

"I am, I am. I'm being careful—fuck. Sorry! Sorry!" I bit my lip, meshing the buttons quickly on the controller. "And I know what you mean. It's just her way of dealing, I guess. Which I think is kind of stupid. She's bottling everything up and thinking a cute guy who pays attention to her can get rid of the grief. It can't and it won't, she's just shifting the problem away and it's gonna come around and bite her in the ass if she doesn't deal with what's really wrong."

We fell into a silence for a while, the sounds of angry zombies, gun fire and the characters screaming 'RELOADING' blaring from the TV.

"What do you do to cope? To be happy?" Jeremy asked quietly and I almost hadn't heard him.

"I forgave. I forgave Elena. I forgave myself. I forgave… our parents, for leaving us. And I decided I wanted to be happy. I need to be happy. It still hurts and I think it will always hurt but if I drown in this, I'm just going to sink lower and lower and I just want to be happy again, you know? I deserve to be. It's what they would want." I knew what it was to grieve someone who meant the world, and so I could speak honestly to him. It just seemed to come out easily, naturally.

"But are you happy?"

"I miss them, but… I'm getting there. I still have you, and Elena and Aunt Jenna, you know? I still have them and you so it helps ease the pain. Don't block me out, you're my favorite little bro."

Jeremy snorted. "I'm your only brother."

"You don't know about my secret family."

It must've been around two thirty when we decided to call it quits and head to bed. Jeremy and I had joked around and laughed after the serious talk. I had a feeling he seriously needed it and I was glad he felt like he could come to me. It was a weird feeling.

I slammed into Stefan on my way back to my room and nearly shrieked in surprise. He looked equally startled, his arms shooting out to grasp my shoulders to keep me from falling over.

"Clare," he said in a whisper, surprised. "What are you doing?" I stared up at him in the darkness.

"What am _I _doing? What are _you _doing? I'm going to bed, do you have any idea what time it is?" I whispered back with a huff. How dare he ask me what I'm doing in my own house!

"Um, late?" He gave a small awkward smile. "I, um… listen, I'm sorry about before, with Caroline…"

"It's fine, Stefan." I whispered, dismissively. A real smile spread across his face and I grinned back sleepily. He really needed to leave before I started being nice to him. "Now get out before someone sees you and your reputation is forever ruined."

"Okay. Night, Clare." He said with a grin.

"Night Steffy, hope the bed bugs bite." I whispered back, turning and trotting back to my own room.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** Yup, still don't own anything, not even the OC.

To be honest guys, I didn't expect anyone to be interested in reading this story, so this is kind of flattering! This is, after all, something I'm writing for my dear friend Witherycode who is going through a seriously rough time. You guys might have... higher expectation, and the plot isn't going to stay very canon for much longer. I have a lot of plans for this story, like adding cheesy holidays in. Awkward vampire thanksgiving and overly romantic christmas. Good times are going to be had. Um. A lot is going to change. And when I say a lot, I MEAN A LOT. Clarissa is going to have a huge impact on a lot of things and there is two giant key elements this story is going to be based on: Humor and fluffy romance. YES. I SAID IT. FLUFFY ROMANCE. This is a very pro-everyone-has-a-disney-true-love-happiness kind of fic. Lots of happiness. And vampire dickery. So if you guys aren't really diggin' that and want basically the show just added with an OC, this is not the story for you.

big thank you to: **vikki. dillard**, **Guest**, **CacklingBlasphemy**,** kat7**, **Britt**, **Apatu** (no plans of abandoning it! I'll still be here writing even if everyone else abandons it ha!),** lee 1280** (they have the possibility to become friends if they'd stop being dicks to each other. damn it Clarissa, Tyler, get your stuff together and just hug.),** DGfleetfox** (SUPER FLATTERING but now I'm kind of worried that you'd hyped it up in your own mind and it's gonna fail expectations.), **ooo a jellybean** (my friend is simply obsessed with minnie mouse, she actually dresses like that.), **lucyinthesky**, **grapejuice101**

* * *

I was rudely woken by Elena pouncing on me. "Clare!" She gushed with a laugh and I moaned miserably, rolling over.

"Go. Away." I groaned, curling up as she ripped the covers off the bed. "Elena!" I peeled an eye open, giving her a pouty look.

"Get up, I want to tell you about last night!" She said with a giddy laugh and I groaned, burying my face back into the pillow.

"I don't want to hear the gross details." I muttered into the pillow and she scoffed.

"Shut up, it wasn't like that. We talked! All night! Isn't that amazing! I can't believe it!" She slid off my bed with a dreamy sigh and I sat up, staring down at her.

"I told you he was gay." I said with a grumble, dragging myself out of bed. Elena threw a pillow at me as she pounced back onto the bed, fully dressed and looking spectacular.

I, on the other hand, looked like I got electrocuted, my hair was sticking up in the back. I rubbed my sleepy eyes, not giving a damn if Elena was here while I changed into a black t-shirt with white lettering that said: _this is my zombie killing shirt_ and blood splatter, a pair of faded blue skinny jeans. I dug through the closet, looking through the shoes and grinned widely finding a pair of black high top converse shoes with rainbow colored hearts dotting it. I opened the jewelry box curiously, pleased at the different sorts of earrings I found. I decided to put in little Minnie Mouse ones. Gotta stay true to my spirit animal.

"We're riding with Bonnie today," Elena said cheerfully as I brushed the knots out of my hair. I didn't understand how they even got there in the first place. "Caroline is still a little sick from last night."

Speaking of which. I grabbed my phone off the vanity dresser. Four texts. Two from Caroline, one from Bonnie, and one from Asshole. I frowned. Asshole? Oh. Right. Tyler.

Caroline's: _what's going on? _and _btw totally over Stefan_

Bonnie: _hopefully care is over the whole stefan thing, so not looking forward to any kind of drama between her and elena_

Tyler: _awkward drunk texts I don't remember sending. We're not friends_.

I snorted, sending him a quick, _I know, we're lovers_ to Tyler just to piss him off, followed by texting Bonnie to let her know Caroline was over it and then texting Caroline the juicy gossip about stumbling into Stefan at two in the morning. I didn't know if Elena wanted me announcing that, but I felt it was best friend duties to deliver the news.

Caroline's text was immediate: _OMG DETS!_

I texted back that I didn't know yet, Elena hadn't explained, as my twin (so weird calling her that), pulled me from the room. "I swear, you and Caroline are like attached to the hip." She said with an amused grin. "Sometimes I feel like you two are the twins."

Jenna caught us in the hall, a large, almost giddy, grin on her face. Her hair was fluffed up and pretty, and she was wearing a flattering dress. I raised my eyebrows, Elena and I glancing at each other.

"Be honest," Jenna said, grinning and spreading her arms out as though presenting herself. "Do I look adult? As in respectfully parental?" I laughed.

"Totally," I nodded as Elena looked Jenna up and down with mock observation.

"Depends where you're going," Elena said cheerfully and Jenna sighed, looking suddenly anxious as she brushed hair from her face.

"Jeremy's parent-teacher conference." Jenna sighed, moving down the hall toward the mirror, Elena and I following. Elena shot me a look and I shrugged my shoulders. "Hair up or down?"

"I like it up, I think it makes you look sophisticated." I grinned and Elena bumped shoulders with me.

"More like sexy stewardess." Elena said with mock seriousness and Jenna frowned, dropping her hair. "Boozy housewife."

Jenna threw her an amused look and glanced at herself in the mirror again. I grinned.

"I think you'll look good no matter how you put your hair."

"Okay, I think I'm going to go with having it up." Jenna said, with a nod to herself in the mirror. "I'm diggin' the mood change, guys. First Clare's in a better mood, then you. I can only hope Jeremy gets aboard the good feeling train."

Hell yeah, I was the conductor of this party train!

"I do feel good," Elena said with a smile. "Which has been rare lately. So I've decided to go with it."

"Translation, Stefan stayed until two AM last night."

Elena smacked my arm as Jenna turned away from the mirror, giving us a look. "Two AM, huh? Well… I hope you kids were safe."

"He's gay, they were just talking." I said before Elena could open her mouth. Jenna laughed.

"What were _you _doing up at two anyway?" My twin demanded, placing her hands on her hips.

"I was playing Left 4 Dead with Jeremy." I said in a matter-of-fact tone, causing Elena to look surprised. A soft smile settled across her face.

"That's good…" she trailed off, glancing around. "Speaking of, where is he?"

"He left early," Jenna murmured distractedly, wiggling around in her dress, staring at herself in the mirror. "Something about getting to wood shop early, he has to check on his birdhouse."

Did this school even have a wood shop? Confusion flickered across Elena's face, answering my question and Jenna dropped her arms to her sides, sighing.

"There is no wood shop, is there?"

It struck me as odd that he would mention a birdhouse. He could have said _anything_. If this version of me was like the old version of me, then did that mean I had the same codes? And would I have shared that with Jeremy? I pulled my phone out, scrolling through the contacts.

_J, Jenna said you went to check on your birdhouse. You seeing a girl? _I texted Jeremy. I followed Elena down the steps.

My phone buzzed, and I flipped it open. Jeremy texted back with a single name: _Vicki_. Ohh.

The girl who was attacked in the woods.

The girl who was Matt's sister.

The girl that Tyler was kind of seeing.

I was guessing Jeremy was aware of that and I decided giving him a lecture was just going to piss him off. I mean, he was fifteen. He was being dumb, getting involved with a girl who was involved with someone else, but all I could really do was support him. He had to figure out what he wanted and how life worked.

_Hope she's doing better _I texted back as Elena grabbed my arm, pulling me out the door.

I slid into the back of Bonnie's car, next to Caroline.

"You guys are helping me with the fliers, right?" Caroline said in a cheerful voice, but I could tell she was brimming with excitement, her eyes flickering in Elena's direction. She obviously wanted to know about the Stefan thing. I on the other hand wondered what she was talking about. Fliers?

"Mmhm," Bonnie rolled her eyes at us from the rear view mirror. "We always help you, Care."

"Yup," Elena agreed with a grin. "We're your personal indentured servants."

"So. True." Bonnie nodded.

"What fliers?" I asked, annoyed that nobody elaborated. Caroline snapped her head in my direction.

"The festival for the comet, Clare, oh my gosh. Short attention span, much? I'm organizing this event, I can't believe you forgot!" She cried looking thoroughly distressed. Holy hell.

"Sorry! It must have slipped my mind, I've been… kind of…" I trailed off, looking for an excuse and guilt flooded Caroline's face. She placed a hand on my shoulder.

"It's okay, I forgot. As long as you're game, everything is totally fine." She said quickly and I grinned at her.

"Hell yeah I am, Care!" I said and she smiled, looking pleased, as my phone buzzed. I pulled it out, seeing a text from Tyler. Caroline peered over my shoulder and mouthed _Tyler? _I grinned, nodding.

_One night stands only, sorry_ he texted back, and I almost laughed out loud. He was actually playing along with it? Ha! Caroline furrowed her brow, giving me a puzzled look. So I showed her the text he sent me this morning and then the one I sent back. She snorted, slapping my shoulder and grinning at me.

"What are you guys talking about?" Elena asked, with forced indifference.

Another text came in, _no but seriously we didn't do anything like that right _and Caroline and I burst into laughter.

"Just send him a winky face!" She said through her giggles. "Oh my God, this is priceless!"

"Who?" Elena sounded honestly confused now. "Who are you texting?"

"Tyler!" Caroline laughed as I sent him a winky face back, laughing so hard my sides were starting to hurt. Elena whipped her head around.

"You have his _number_?" She asked, surprised. "I thought we were snubbing him!"

"Yeah what the hell? You have to fill us in like _yesterday_!" Bonnie agreed.

"Matt gave him my number so we could coordinate for the dance," I explained. "Which is just silly since we're gonna literally walk in together and that's it. And so last night at the party he just texts me out of the blue saying I see you and turn around. And then we just kind of… texted all night. Nothing big, he was really drunk."

"Nothing _big_?" Caroline scoffed. "If a boy, drunk or not, spends his time texting a girl that means something! Plus he came over when Stefan was hanging out with us and told him to eff off! He was jealous!" What! Oh my God, no!

"Oh my God!" Elena cried, her mouth falling open. "You and Tyler? _Really_?"

"No!" I denied laughing. "God no! He came over because I told him I didn't want Stefan bothering me—"

"Aw, how sweet!" Bonnie gushed. "That's much more romantic than him being _jealous_."

"No, actually, since I agreed to go to the dance with him, he said he'd owe me one. And so he was repaying his debt." I said quickly, shaking my head.

"But he's still texting you! And he texted you this morning. It _means _something." Caroline said firmly. I opened my mouth. "Shut up, Clare, let me have this. I need to live vigorously through you."

Three guesses who grabbed my arm and pulled me into the corner of the hall. Tyler. I nodded to Caroline, Elena and Bonnie to go on without me and Caroline gave me a look which clearly said she wanted to know exactly what was going to be said and done. She also wiggled her eyebrows and I rolled my eyes.

"You didn't answer my text," Tyler said lowly, glancing around us as if afraid someone would be listening in.

"What's the last thing you remember from last night?" I asked, wondering if I should play along to us totally doing the deed.

"I… remember telling that Stefan guy to fuck off, and then… I vaguely remember Vick being hurt." Tyler said slowly, narrowing his eyes in thought. I patted him lightly on the chest.

"Too bad, guess you won't know what we did in the woods, then," I teased, turning to leave when he grabbed my arm, pulling me back. I stared at him, shocked. He couldn't take a freakin' joke!

"I'm serious, Clare, I want to know what happened." He said lowly, irritation flashing across his face.

"Clare?" Stefan's voice trickled in and I groaned. "We're going to be late for class…" Tyler glared at Stefan and I turned, staring flatly as Stefan stared back at Tyler.

"You guys can hook up and have a lot of resentful angry sex," I said, pulling my arm from Tyler who scoffed. "Nothing happened, okay? I was just kidding."

"Whatever, this is dumb." Tyler muttered, walking away and purposely slamming his shoulder against Stefan's. Jeez. Talk about being moody. The man-period was contagious, apparently. Stefan didn't looked fazed in the slightest and smiled at me.

"May I walk with you to class?" He asked and I shrugged a shoulder. I didn't remember where the classroom was anyway, I had been planning on demanding Tyler walk me there, but this worked out better. "I'm, uh, you know… sorry for bumping into you last night like that. I just want you to know that nothing happened between me and your sister, it was just—"

"Talking. Yeah. I know. You're an honorable gentleman, I get it." I nodded, waving my hand dismissively. A slow smile crept across his face.

"Oh," he looked like he just remembered something, shifting his bag over and going through it. I watched him impatiently, we _really _needed to get to class. Stefan pulled out a small stack of what looked like—oh my god, were those comics? "Elena said your favorite Robin was Jason Todd, and these were laying around so…"

I brightened instantly as he offered me the comics, and smiled gleefully up at him. "Oh my God, oh my God, Steffy this is amazing!" I shrieked excitedly, bouncing up and down. He grinned widely back at me as I gently took them from him, warmth spreading through my chest. This was amazing!

"I'm glad you're so happy." He said as we continued to walk down the hall. I couldn't take my eyes off the cover of the top comic. I had read most of Jason's run online, but that was totally different than actually _holding _the comics. "You can keep them if you like."

I snapped my head upward, staring at Stefan with a sense of flattered awe. Was he serious? But why?

Oh.

The grin slipped off my face and I, with a last look at the comics, held them back out to him, feeling a crushing disappointment.

"Giving me these isn't going to make me like you, so here…" Because it was true. If anything, I was feeling kind of annoyed. That was a dirty trick, my friendship can't be bought! Stefan's grin dimmed and he shook his head, gently pushing my hand back.

"I know. Keep them anyway. At least I'll know they're going to a good home with someone who will appreciate them."

What even was he doing? He and Elena were basically a thing now, so why did he keep insisting I like him? Frowning, I walked into Mr. Tanner's class just as the bell rang. Elena rose her eyebrows, looking at me and then Stefan and I had a feeling she _asked _Stefan to let me borrow the comics. Ugh, double dislike for Stefan. I shook my head and plopped down in front of her. It was time to ignore Mr. Tanner and doodle.

About thirty minutes into his droning speech I caught: "It hasn't been over Mystic Falls in over one hundred and forty-five years." I tilted my head upward, looking at Mr. Tanner. "Now, the comet will be its brightest right after dusk during tomorrow's celebration."

I narrowed my eyes with thought. If it was 2009 now, and he said the last time the comet was overhead was like a hundred and forty-five years ago… That would be 1864. Was that when all that vampire shit went down? Why does everything revolve around that year and these vampires? This comet was going to play a part in vampire dickery, I just knew it. Goddamn it.

Pretty soon it was the end of the day. I'd explained the Tyler thing like three different times to Caroline, who was convinced there was something more going on. Elena had wanted to know why I still disliked Stefan when he went out of his way to get me those comics, which just really annoyed me. Stefan wasn't _genuine_, and it kind of bothered me to know that they talked about me. Something which I told Caroline and Bonnie about.

"That is a little weird." She agreed as we walked through the halls. "I mean maybe he really is gay. Who stays up all night talking?"

"I think it's romantic," Bonnie said on my other side, already knowing the story from Elena who had immediately texted her last night when Stefan left. "He wants to do more than just the physical. He wants to get to know Elena, get to know her soul."

"Or he's gay and not interested in her like that." I said with a laugh.

"Is that something your witch powers sense, Bonnie?" Caroline said with a teasing smile.

"No, it's what my romance novel senses tell me," Bonnie countered back playfully. "Trust me, I read a lot of them. Stefan is every girl's dream."

"Not mine." I disagreed with a frown.

"You're just a freak accident." Bonnie said as Caroline brightened.

"That's because the total hottie from last night is your type." Caroline said cheerfully. Damon would sooner rip my throat out then do the touchy feely romantic thing. I burst into laughter as Bonnie rose her eyebrows.

"What hottie?" She asked and Caroline grinned like a cat that ate a canary.

"There was this hottie at Mainline last night who apparently our dear Clarissa knows. And I'm talking like major hottie." Caroline said with a dramatic flair, like she was announcing the juiciest gossip that she's ever come across. Bonnie gave me an amused look and I shrugged a shoulder upward.

"Well no wonder you don't like Stefan, you've been hoarding a hot guy without telling us!"

What!

No!

"I did tell you," I insisted as she slapped my arm. "He's my serial killer BFF."

"Should I warn Aunt Jenna you're hanging out with serial killers?" Jeremy asked lightly, falling in step with us. I grinned widely at him and his lips tugged upward. "Killer shirt, C, should have told me the theme was zombies today. We could've matched."

"Hey Jeremy," Bonnie greeted politely and he nodded at her in that guy greeting that I could never understand.

"How's the birdhouse coming along?" I asked, changing the subject. Jeremy's expression turned soft.

"I think okay. I'm gonna head back over to check to see how it's doing and if it needs anything." He said and I inwardly grinned. Talking code was so awesome. I nodded.

"Okay. Text me if you need anything."

He smiled slightly, and took off down the opposite hall. Caroline groaned.

"I hate when you guys talk in code." She complained and I wasn't surprised that she knew. In fact, it made me feel kind of… happy.

"It's nice to see Jeremy looking less… emo-stoner-y." Bonnie said, looking after him, before turning her gaze to me. I smiled.

"Yeah."

We met up with Elena who was looking a little confused standing out in the courtyard.

"Hey, what's up?" I asked and she turned around, looking flustered.

"Oh, um, nothing I just thought…" she trailed off and smiled. "Don't worry about it." I frowned. I hated when she did that.

"Ready?" Bonnie asked with a grin and Elena nodded. "So did Clare tell you about her super-hot friend?" Elena looked at me, eyebrows raised and I shook my head. No. There was no friend. And he wasn't a super hottie! He was a savage vampire with a serious bloodlust! I hopped into the back seat of Bonnie's car with Caroline.

"Who? No. When was this? What friend?" Elena demanded, turning around in her seat to look at me and I raised my hands.

"We're not exactly friends," I defended with a frown. "I just keep bumping into him everywhere." Because he was a vampire who got off on stalking his pray before violently killing them.

"It's fate." Bonnie said in her mystic voice.

"Or he's stalking you." Caroline suggested and I grinned at her. Hell yeah, best friends think alike! "But he's really hot so it doesn't really matter." Or not.

"If I go missing, know that I've been murdered." I deadpanned.

"Is this the same guy you said was a serial killer?" Elena asked, amused. Wasn't sure what she was amused about. She should be concerned! And worried for her only twin sister!

"Yeah what's with that?" Bonnie asked, pulling into a spot in front of Mystic Grill.

"Inside joke," I said, hopping out of the car.

"Okay enough with the hot guy talk, it's time to get to business." Caroline turned, smiling at Elena. "Unless you've got some hot guy stories to tell?"

"I know Clare already told you about it, Caroline." Elena said with a playful eye roll. "We just talked. End of discussion."

"Boring." Caroline said with a huff.

"Gay." I agreed.

"Romantic." Bonnie sighed dreamily, pulling out a chair and sitting at the little round table in front of the building. I sat between her and Caroline, Elena across from me.

"Can I get you anything?" The waitress from the other night said with a smile. Caroline nodded.

"Yes, four waters please?" She said, pulling her bag onto her lap and bringing out a folder labeled _fliers_.

"Great, time to fold the fliers. Why didn't you do that before?" Elena asked while Caroline divided the papers up, giving each of us a small stack. Oh this was going to be fun.

"Because Elena," Caroline said with a huff. "I was a little busy planning a _festival_ and making sure everything will be here on time, making sure all the staff are reliable. It's just a _little bit_ time consuming."

Elena gave her a sarcastic smile as the waitress returned with the glasses, carefully setting them down in front of each of us.

"Oh stop it guys, this is going to be fun," Bonnie said cheerfully, picking up the first paper and folding it in half. "And I'm positive the festival is going to be amazing, as every event you're in charge of is." Caroline's lips tugged into a tiny, grateful, smile.

"It's kind of surreal," Elena murmured after a few moments of silence. "And kind of cool that we're getting to see this comet in our lifetime."

"Well," Bonnie leaned forward. "I was talking to Grams and she said the comet is a sign of impending doom."

I snapped my fingers. "I believe her." I said immediately. "Last time the comet was here was in 1860's and a lot of death happened! We should just leave until it's gone."

"You play creepy zombie video games but you're afraid of a rock flying out in space?" Elena laughed, shaking her head.

"That's what Grams said, Clare." Bonnie grinned, amused. "The last time it passed over Mystic Falls there was lots of death. So much blood and carnage. It created a bed of paranormal activity."

"Maybe Superman will come flying down from the comet. Maybe it'll be like that show you and Jer used to watch. Smallville?" Elena teased and I made a face at her. Yeah, real nice Elena.

"Yeah," Caroline said with a scoff. "And then you poured Grams another shot and she told you about the aliens." She said with a snarky look. Bonnie threw her an offended lone back but Caroline was already turned to Elena.

"I believe Grams," I told Bonnie and she smiled faintly.

"So then what?" Caroline said over me, looking intently at Elena who sighed, shaking her head and smiling at us.

"So then nothing."

"Because he's gay." I pointed out. Elena scrunched her nose up at me.

"Or because he's a respectable gentlemen." Bonnie countered.

"You're telling me you and Stefan _talked_ all night?" Caroline gave a disbelieving look in my direction and turned back around to stare at Elena, resting her chin in her palm. "There was no… sloppy first kiss? Or touchy feely of any kind?"

"Nope," Elena said, popping the p. "We didn't go there."

Caroline glanced at me and I shook my head. "I wouldn't know, I was playing loud zombie video games with J til two."

"Oh come on, Elena!" Caroline sat back, sounding offended. "We are your friends! Clare is your twin! Okaay? You are supposed to share the smut."

"I told you, Care, Stefan is boooring. He wouldn't know how to be smutty even if it would save his brooding life."

"He's not boring, Clare." Elena said with a faint smile. "It was amazing, we just talked. For hours."

"See, romantic." Bonnie nodded her head. "I told you, this guy is a keeper."

"Oh my God, just jump his bones already!" Caroline huffed, shaking her head. "It's easy. Boy likes girl. Girl likes boy. Sex!"

I burst into laughter as Elena shot us a flat look. "Profound."

"You should be the health teacher, Care." I said with a grin. "Teach everyone it's a-okay to give into our primal desires. Seriously, Elena, you need a night of wild passion."

Elena slammed the flier she was working on down, a look crossing her face as she turned, grabbing her bag. I lifted my eyebrows, exchanging a look with Caroline.

"Elena? Where are you going?" Bonnie asked, looking baffled. She glanced at Caroline and I but I shrugged, having no idea. I didn't think Elena was easily offended enough to leave after being teased.

"They're right." Elena said, standing, with a determined look. I blinked at her. What? "It is easy. If I sit here long enough I'll end up talking myself out of it instead of doing what I started the day saying I was going to do." She shrugged her shoulders and turned, walking away.

"Dear diary, I will get laid today and it will be amazing." I broke the silence after we stared after her in shock for a few seconds. Caroline snorted as Bonnie rolled her eyes with a grin.

"She does know you drove her here, right?" Caroline looked toward Bonnie. "I guess she's walking…"

"It's worth the walk." Bonnie said passionately. "The walk of a determined strong woman going to grasp the bull by the balls and take what is hers." Caroline and I burst into giggles just as Elena walked back over to us with an embarrassed smile.

"Bon, can you drive me home so I can get my car and drive to Stefan's?" She asked, cheeks pink and Caroline and I laughed harder. "Shut up."

"Sure. We might as well leave, most of the fliers are done. Clare and I can finish the rest at home, okay Care?"

"As long as you do them." Caroline said in a cheerful singsong. "Otherwise I'll kill you."

"Surrounded by murderous people." I sighed happily as my phone buzzed in my pocket. "My life is complete." I pulled my phone out, reading the text from Jeremy: _aunt jenna just gave me the "stoner talk"_

Oh jeez. _awkward, ask her where babies come from next time_ I texted back with a faint grin. I really liked Jeremy and I could totally seeing us having an awesome brother-sister thing happening. A few days here and I was already mega attached to everyone.

I texted Jeremy for the majority of the ride, him letting me know he was off to see Vicki and probably wouldn't be home til later. I let him know I'd save him something for dinner.

"Hey," Elena said as we waved goodbye to Bonnie and Caroline. I turned to her. "Do you want to come with me?"

"To watch you guys get kissy face?" I asked with a laugh, smiling and shaking my head. "Nah, you go ahead. It's a private thing. Just let me know if you need anything." I wiggled my eyebrows and she teasingly shoved me into the house.

"Shut up, that won't happen." Elena said with a laugh, grabbing her keys and dropping her bag down by the steps. "Are you sure you don't want to come?"

"Yeah I'm sure. You and Stefan might want to sit around and talk, and that's super boring." I held up the fliers. "Plus I have these to do."

She took a deep breath. "Okay. How do I look?"

"Flawlessly perfect." I grinned and she smiled back. "Now go on. Go do the moony eye thing with him."

I headed into the kitchen as Elena pranced out of the house, Jenna standing at the island making what looked like tacos. She smiled at me as I placed the flies on the table. "Hey. Where's Elena?"

With her vampire boyfriend. "She went to Stefan's and I'm stuck here, making fliers for Caroline." I said warmly. I hadn't really spent any one on one time with Jenna yet and I was kind of anxious about it. What if she figured out I had taken over this Clarissa's body via creepy dream? It was the first logical choice anyone would come to if I acted out of character.

"Ah." She nodded, trying to smother an amused grin. "Well, don't feel too bad. I tried to have a talk with Jeremy and he bailed on me half way through." She paused as I began folding the fliers. "You two have always been really close. And I know things have been strained between all of you, but… Do you think you could maybe talk to him?" I hesitated on what I should say.

On one hand, a typical seventeen year old reply would be _okay_ because I shouldn't be able to relate or understand what Jeremy is going through.

And on the other hand, if I was going to make a new life here I should support my new brother and bring certain aspects to life.

"I don't think that's what he needs right now." I said quietly. "He's fifteen and he feels like he has no control over his life. He doesn't know how to grieve properly and he's become dependent on outside sources to get him through the day. He's going to rebel if we demand him to stop. He needs stability and he needs to feel like he can open up and talk to someone who isn't making him feel guilty over something he feels he needs. He's a good kid, he's in a funk, and he'll get out of it."

Jenna rose her eyebrows at me, looking impressed. "You should think about going into psychology, become a therapist. That was deep." She laughed and I smiled awkwardly. That _had _been my major. "But he's seriously flunking school, and he needs to snap out of soon. He could seriously damage his future."

"He'll bounce back. J is a phoenix." I assured her.

"Phoenixes burst into flames and die before being reborn." Jenna frowned. "I saw Harry Potter. I know that." Point there.

"Why do we fall down? To get back up. He's going to be okay. None of us will let him crash, we're his safety net, but he's fifteen. He needs to learn how to walk without everyone holding his hand."

She sighed, leaning against the island. "I'm supposed to be the wise adult with good insight and you're supposed to be the teen who seeks advice."

"Okay." I grinned. "I need advice. There's this boy…"

"Oh something I'm good at!" Jenna stood up, giving me a serious nod. "Okay, continue."

"Well, we're not friends. The other night he asked Caroline if I'm _dating _anyone and then kind of demands I go to the Founder's dance with him because his mother wants us to been seen together. Like he even offered me money. I mean, I blew him off, because hell no. But then he corners me at school and he says he'll get me whatever I want if I go with him. Like it'd be a two second thing, show up together and then we're done. And so I think, well, what if I want a really awesome favor in the future, so I agree. And then at the party the other night he gets my number and I—well, I don't like Stefan. Long story. But anyway, I tell him that I don't like Stefan and I wish Stefan would go away so he shows up and tells Stefan to eff off and then says that we're even. Like that's his favor in return for me agreeing to go to the dance. But even though he's at this party and getting drunk, he still texts me all night and even this morning to let me know we're not friends. But he texts me anyway." I took a breath. "Also he's kind of dating Vicki. Matt's sister."

"He sounds like a dick." Jenna said with a shrug and I grinned.

"That's what I was thinking! But Care insists there's something more to it." I sighed, nearly finished with the fliers.

"Well… If he liked you, would it change anything?" Jenna asked and I frowned, shaking my head. "Then don't worry about it. It doesn't matter if he likes you or not, he's a dick and you don't need to get involved with that."

I sat back in the chair thoughtfully. "Thanks. That actually makes everything a lot better." I pulled my phone out, letting Caroline know I was finished with her precious fliers.

By the time I was finished with my homework, Elena came marching into the kitchen, throwing her bag down on the table. Jenna and I shared a glance. I was gonna take a wild guess that seeing Stefan wasn't a successful mission.

"Jenna made tacos," I said brightly and Jenna jumped up, bringing the plate to the table and placing it in the middle, smiling widely and presenting it dramatically.

"I made tacos!" Jenna repeated. "These are amazing tacos! Delicious tacos!"

Elena slammed her text book on the table. "Great." She muttered. "Can't wait to eat them."

"I finished our fliers so we won't be horrifically murdered tomorrow." I said cheerfully. Elena looked up at me suddenly.

"Damon says hello, by the way." Elena said in a clipped tone, and opened her notebook, starting her homework.

"Damon?" Jenna repeated and I inwardly grinned. What a dick, he totally would. I suddenly knew what happened when Elena left. She ran into Damon and Damon did his typical vampire dickery to sabotage the Stefan-Elena relationship.

"You met Damon?" I then turned to Jenna. "Damon is my serial killer BFF." Jenna sighed, shaking her head.

"Did you know he's Stefan's brother?" Elena scoffed. Yes.

"I can see who got the cool genes in the family." I said instead.

"Stefan didn't even _tell _me he had a brother living with him!" Elena raged, snatching a taco and eating it moodily.

"Well," I might not be pro-Stefan, but I couldn't help wanting to calm the situation. "He did say he doesn't get along with his brother… and you guys have only known each other for a few days, so…"

"We talked about so much last night! I told him about you and Jeremy! And he didn't bring up Damon once!" She sighed angrily, fingers rubbing her temple. "I don't want to talk about it now. I need to focus." I pulled my phone out. "Don't you dare text Caroline, I'll break your phone."

I placed my phone down on the table and put my hands in my lap. Pissed Elena was scary.

"So, I'm going to enjoy these tacos." Jenna said loudly, pulling the plate closer to her.

"Sounds like an excellent plan." I agreed and she slid the plate in my direction. "I promised J I'd save him some dinner, just FYI."

"Oh, really? And where did Jeremy _go_?" Jenna asked with a huff, looking at me with raised eyebrows.

"Birdhouse." I shrugged, picking up a taco.

"Fine, keep your secrets."

I managed to convince Jenna to not spite Jeremy and put the last five tacos in tupperware for him to eat later. Elena was done with her homework, but her mood hadn't improved at all so I suggested we make sundaes.

"He's apparently on the rebound and has raging family issues." Elena muttered, angrily squeezing the chocolate syrup into the bowl. "He got all weird on me, too. Like really cold and detached and had a stare down with Damon, who, by the way, was nothing but welcoming and friendly."

Ha!

"Yeah he's a pretty chill guy," I said with a nod, sitting cross legged on the chair, bowl of ice cream in front of me. He likes to murder on the weekends with a nice smile. Real standup vampire he is.

"Hey, just be glad it's an ex-girlfriend," Jenna said, picking up an apple. She grinned. "Wait til you date a guy with Mommy issues." Elena gave her a flat stare. "Or cheating issues." Or vampire issues. Oh wait, that's already happening for her. "Or amphetamine issues!"

"Maybe you should let us pick your boyfriends." I frowned at Jenna. "You have terrible luck."

"By all means…" Her grin slid off her face. "_Jeremy_!"

I brightened. "J!" I called, turning my head to see him. He was hovering moodily in the doorway, hood up. "C'mere, I saved you tacos. They're in the fridge." I turned to Jenna, giving her a look and she stilled, sighing, nodding back to me.

"Yeah," she said. "We saved you a few."

"This isn't a ruse to get me to listen to more stoner stories, is it?" He asked, coming into the kitchen and swiping the bowl of ice cream from me.

"Hey!"

"Nope." Jenna said, struggling to look cheerful. "Just tacos."

Elena looked between Jenna and I before rolling her eyes and sitting across from me. She gave me a _look_, which clearly stated I was going to explain why Jenna wasn't jumping down his throat. I grinned widely.

Jeremy sat down next to me, eating _my _ice cream and I swatted his arm.

"Dude." I said. "You gotta eat tacos before you get the ice cream."

"Dude." He said back. "I'm taller than you, I make the rules." That's not how it works!

"So Clare tells me you were working on your birdhouse this afternoon…" Jenna leaned against the back of the island, biting into the apple. I snorted.

"Work that birdhouse, J. Work it." I said and he slapped my arm.

"Okay what is that code for?" Elena asked, pointing her spoon at us. "I know it's one of your codes."

"Birdhouse." Jeremy and I chorused and Elena threw her hands up.

"Fine."

Jenna pulled the tacos out of the fridge for Jeremy, who then surrendered my ice cream after eating like half of it! Jerk!

"So I… uh, went to visit Vicki." Jeremy began awkwardly, causing Elena and Jenna's heads to snap in his direction, both looking surprised.

"How's she doin'?" I asked casually. He needed to feel like it was okay to talk about, like it wasn't weird or surprising. Jenna and Elena needed to chill out. "Did you see Matt?" Jeremy relaxed a bit.

"Yeah, he's with her. She's doing a lot better. She lost a lot of blood and they stitched up her neck, but she's doing good." He stood up. "Thanks for the tacos, Aunt Jenna." Jeremy flicked the side of my head and I whined, swiping at his arm and missing. He laughed at me.

"Oh, wait, Jeremy…" Jenna followed after him. "I gotta do the parental authority thing, okay? You gotta stop ditching class, or I'll… I dunno, I'll ground you."

Jeremy nodded slowly. "Okay."

Both Jenna and Elena seemed to wait until they heard his door close before they pounced on me.

"Wow, I haven't seen Jer act so… friendly and open in what feels like forever." Elena said with a wide smile.

"I'm definitely going to continue doing things your way," Jenna said. "I just hope he took me seriously and goes to class."

"I guess we'll just have to wait and see." Elena said cheerfully. "Thanks for dinner, Aunt Jenna. Clare, come on, I wanna talk to you." She grabbed my hand, pulling me out of the chair and up the steps.

The first round of conversation was about Stefan and how hurt she felt. Which led into Jeremy and how excited she was at the idea that he might be starting to return to his old self. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised when she told me that Jeremy and I were always really close and that she hoped we could all become like that. The conversation got a bit tearful when she said she didn't like the person she was before the accident and she was going to try her hardest to make it up to the both of us.

Extreme feels were extreme and I surprisingly handled it well.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** Nope, still don't own anything. Not even Clarissa.

Thank you: grapejuice101, ty, Apatu, Guest, ooo a jellybean, DGfleetfox, RosesMoon, Bronzelove, Zoey24, JackieOh for reviewing and your awesome, encouraging words! I really hope you guys continue to like the story. Starting now, it's going to become less and less canon.

* * *

There was no school today given that there was a festival for this comet. I guess since it was a small town they could get away with doing stuff like that, and this was literally once in a life time thing. I assumed that meant I could sleep forever.

"Get out of bed, Clare." Caroline demanded, ripping the pillow from under my head. I groaned unhappily. Why was this happening? Why was everyone here against sleeping? I was a cat. I needed at least fourteen hours of sleep a day. "It's eight thirty!" Oh dear God. "We have to get ready!"

For what?

The festival didn't even start until like the afternoon!

"If you get up now, I'll let you wear _the_ headband." She said in a singsong and I rolled over, peering up at her sleepily. In her hand was a black headband with a giant red white polka-dotted Minnie Mouse bow. My eyes grew wide. It was the greatest thing I had ever seen. She smirked. "That's what I thought."

She handed it to me and I squealed excitedly, letting her drag me out of bed. She already had an outfit picked out for me and I didn't even care. I put on the knee length white black polka-dotted dress that had a bow which was tied in the front and fluffy short sleeves. She even pulled out matching underwear and white polka-dotted socks that had frill around the edge. I was allowed to wear my Minnie Mouse shoes if I agreed to let her flatiron my hair and put lip-gloss on. Which, obviously, yeah I was gonna do.

"Bonnie and I will meet you," Elena said from the doorway and Caroline rolled her eyes in my direction and tossed a white sweater at me.

"Sure." Caroline said as I put the sweater on, slipping my phone into the pocket. "Let's go Clare, we have a lot of work to do."

There was a lot to do between nine and twelve. Like a lot. There was setting up venders, advising the face paint staff the best places to set up, where to have the balloons, making sure there were enough _empty _garbage cans. Elena and Bonnie showed up around eleven (much to Caroline's frustration) and were tasked to handing out the fliers. The square seemed to explode with activity around eleven thirty. Like there was people _everywhere_. People having picnics, children running around, people getting their face painted. I grinned at Caroline.

"Another flawless victory for you."

She smiled. "I _know_." Her gaze flickered over to where Bonnie and Elena were, slowly strolling and occasionally handing out fliers. She growled. "Hold on… stupid slackers." She muttered walking off.

I liked Caroline's pro-event attitude. She could probably run a business. My headband was gently pulled off my head and I whirled around to find Damon. I stared in surprise at him and he grinned wickedly at me.

"Weeeell, aren't you just _adorable_ today…?" He twirled my headband around in his hands. "I get the feeling you like Minnie Mouse." He said, his eyes much lighter in the sunlight. I wondered if Vampire Diaries' vampires had the ability to dazzle because his eyes, holy hell, I never seen anyone with eyes like his. They were so _pretty_.

"What gave you that impression?" I asked with mock confusion and he tapped the side of his head with my headband. He leaned closer, as though about to share a secret with me.

"I'm a telepath," he murmured quietly in my ear. "Shh, don't tell anyone."

"I'll keep your secret." I vowed, placing a hand over my heart. Damon leaned back, rolling on his heels and, to my delight, put my headband on his head. "So Elena tells me you're Stefan's brother. What a horribly small world."

His grin turned sarcastic. "Ah, Stefan. Great guy he is." Time to play with the vampire dickery. I shook my head.

"Nope," I disagreed cheerfully. "Your brother is a boring burger tits and I'd appreciate it if you told him to _leave me alone_. He's not getting the message when I say it." Damon's lips tugged into a frown.

"Hey, now, don't make fun of the burger tits, it runs in the family…" he trailed off with a sad sigh before smirking, slowly circling around me. It came off as threatening to me. "Don't worry, Clary, I'll set him straight. You know, I think you might be one of the only people who feel that way about him."

"They're swept up with his tortured brooding stare, and don't realize how boring he is." I said knowingly. "So here we are again, at another event. Is today the day you give into your murderous desires and go on a killing spree?"

He tapped the tip of my nose with his finger and slid closer to me. My heart jumped almost _excitedly_. Weird. "Maybe." He said in a singsong, his smirk stretching across his face. He tilted his head, looking over my shoulder. "Ah. Elena and your friends are looking. Should we do something wildly inappropriate?"

"Strip down at the count of three?" I suggested, bringing his gaze back to me. "We'll say it was drugs in the water. It'll be very convincing and believable."

"If only you weren't in that dress, I'd hate to see it get ruined." He said with a pout. "The plans are foiled. But next time." I grinned. See, this was fun! If Stefan did this shit I'd like him, maybe. "Are you staying for the comet tonight?" Why was he asking that? Confused, I nodded. "And you think that flimsy little sweater will keep you warm? Oh, Clary, you silly girl." He sighed like I was a child who didn't know any better and shrugged out of his leather jacket, draping it over my shoulders. What the hell was this?

Despite myself, my cheeks warmed. Oh goddamn it. Damon smirked and it came off as haughty and totally smug.

Jerk.

His leather jacket was heavy on my shoulders, and I felt two sizes smaller with how big it was.

His hand flitted down and he pulled my cellphone out of my pocket before I could even register what he was doing. "I'm giving you my number. When you're about to go home, call me, and we'll switch." He tossed the phone back to me and I clumsily caught it, dropping it into the leather jacket's pocket.

Switch?

My gaze flashed upward to my Minnie Mouse headband. I frowned. "Be careful, that's my favorite headband."

He threw me a theatrical look of hurt, gasping as though offended. "Don't you trust me?"

"I try, but I've been burned by so many that I don't know what it is to trust anymore!" I said just as dramatically, welling fake tears in my eyes. His expression became serious as he took my hands gently into his and it was like a shock of electricity jolted through me. My skin tingled. Maybe this is what it was like to touch a vampire? Weird and _shocking_.

"Let me be the light that guides you." He urged in a soft coo. Oh my God, this was too funny.

"No!" I pulled my hands from his as dramatically as I could. "You'll be like the comet, coming and going and I won't see you for another hundred something years!"

"It's my way of life, damn it!" He growled playfully, his blue eyes gleaming at me. "Trust me and I'll show you… a whole new world."

I stared at him.

He stared back.

"Shining, shimmering, splendid." He draped an arm over my shoulders, tugging me closer to him. He trailed his hand out across the sky in front of us, like he was showing me something fantastic that was in the horizon. I was trying really hard not to burst into laughter. "Tell me _princess_ when did you last let your heart decide?"

"Clare, are you going to introduce us to your friend?" Caroline asked almost suggestively and I turned, finding her, Bonnie and Elena standing just behind us. All _grinning _at me. Damon turned around with me, his arm dropping from my shoulders but he didn't move away.

"Hello, I'm Damon," he said with a polite little drawl. "Stefan's older brother. And hello _again_, Elena."

She smiled faintly. "Hey."

"You I remember from Mainline." Damon tilted his head toward Caroline. "It's lovely to meet you properly this time..."

"I'm Caroline," she said quickly, holding out her hand to shake. Damon gently pulled it into his, raising it to his lips. Oh Damon, you charming violent criminal, you. Caroline flashed me a grin. "I'm Clare's best friend. And this is Bonnie." Bonnie settled for a wave as she, too, sent me a grin.

What was that even about?

"You're looking really good in Clare's Minnie Mouse headband." Elena said with a laugh and Damon smiled politely. I wondered why he was acting like… Less Damon-y? I told everyone he was a serial killer and now he was making me look like a liar. Freakin' vampires.

"Thank you, that's very gracious of you to say so." He turned to me, blue eyes lit with an obvious mischief. "And now, lovely Clarissa, I must go. Things to do…" He trailed off and I cracked a grin, trying to shake the flutter that pulsed through me. Nobody says my name the way he does.

"People to kill. I get it. Don't get caught, because then I'll never get my headband back." I teased causing his lips to pull into a smirk. He grasped my hand, kissing the back of it and I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. He was showing off now. With a polite incline of his head to Bonnie, Elena and Caroline, and a wink to me, he sauntered off.

Still wearing my headband and looking ridiculous in it.

Ridiculously sexy.

How did he manage that?

Goddamn it.

"Oh. My. God!" Caroline gushed, rushing to me and jumping up and down. "He's so hot, how can you stand it? And he _kissed _my hand! Nobody does that anymore! And he gave you his jacket! Oh my God, he gave you _his jacket_!"

"Are you guys a thing?" Bonnie asked, with a wide grin and I snorted.

"We're not even friends." They were getting uncomfortably hyped up over nothing.

"How can you say that?" Caroline demanded. "He gave you his jacket!" Because he wants an excuse to kill me tonight.

"I guess hotness runs in the family." Bonnie sighed. "Do you think they have any more brothers?" Elena looked irritated by the idea of it. More secrets hidden from her! Curse you Stefan!

"And I saw him holding your hands before! Why didn't you tell me about him sooner?" Caroline continued. "Oh my God, he is _so _your type!" What made her say that?!

"This is like the fourth time bumping into him! And they all have lasted like five minutes! There is nothing to tell!" I cried, feeling overwhelmed. "Seriously!" I bet Damon did this on purpose! He knew they were watching! Goddamn it!

"Guys," Elena said with a small laugh, coming to stand next to me. "You know if something was going on, Clare would tell us. He was just being polite giving her his jacket. Friendly, even. Lay off her, she's gonna freak." I smiled gratefully at Elena and she wrapped an arm around my shoulders, grinning back.

"Fine." Caroline pouted as my phone buzzed. I slipped into Damon's jacket, the sleeves falling four inches past my fingertips and I pulled my phone out. Tyler: _all girls are psychos _Thanks? I quickly texted him back, asking him if he needed a hug. Cheers to sarcasm.

"I brought your camera," Elena was saying, pulling a blue digital Canon from her pocket, offering it and I brightened. "I know you used to be obsessed with documenting entire days and I thought maybe…"

"No, yeah, oh my God, Elena, thank you!" I gushed excitedly, taking it from her. Her smile widened. I didn't know if the other me was as crazy as I was, but I was going to record and take pictures of _everything _and _everyone_! I grabbed Caroline's hand. "C'mon Care, we gotta take pictures of your festival."

She laughed. "Start out with a video, Clare." Caroline said with an amused grin and I bounced, turning the camera on. "Let me know when it's recording!"

"Now," I said, hitting the tiny record button. Caroline pranced in front of the camera, flashing a smile.

"Today's fabulous festival is held in Mystic Fall's town square where tonight this small humble town will be witnessing a comet slowly move across the sky. A comet which hasn't been seen in over a hundred and forty-five years!" Caroline said, very reporter like, walking backwards as she gestured to various venders and people. I grinned widely. Where has Caroline been all my life? "Some say the comet is the sign of impending doom, others say it is a bringer of good fortune. Let's ask this fine gentleman what he thinks." Caroline turned to an amused looking Matt. "Sir? What do you think of the comet?" Matt grinned, looking at Caroline and then to the camera.

"I think the comet is the bringer of getting out of school for the day." He said cheerfully and Caroline's lips twitched.

"And there you have it, folks, straight from an upstanding citizen of Mystic Falls. I'm Caroline Forbes, signing out."

I ended the video and grinned widely at her. "That was the freakin' best." I said cheerfully. Oh my God, I wish I had someone like Caroline back in my old life. "Time to take pictures. Smile Matt!" Matt flashed a smile and posed, spreading his arms out as though presenting Caroline while she placed her hands on her hips, smiling at the camera.

Best.

Freakin'.

People.

Ever.

It seemed everyone was really cool with me going around taking pictures, Caroline posing in almost all of them. She stood in front of the venders, where most of the workers happily agreed to pose as well. I took pictures of various children showing off their face paint and even had various people leap in front of us, already striking poses. I was overwhelmed with glee. We eventually made our way into Mystic Grill, and took a few different shots of Jeremy who seemed really happy I was taking pictures again. I even got one with him and his lady friend Vicki.

"How's the picture taking going?" Bonnie asked as she and Elena sat down at a table with Caroline and I. We had decided to get some lunch. Meaning cheese fries.

"Really great." I said with a grin, shrugging out of the leather jacket to eat my cheese fries. "I think we've got some really good ones."

"Another album to add to the ever growing collection on Facebook." Elena said playfully and I felt a curiosity rise. Of course I'd have a Facebook. What teenager didn't? And this could give me a chance to see what kind of person this Clarissa was like. I mean we already had so much in common…

"Would you like me to take a picture of you guys?" Vicki asked, standing in front of our table and I beamed, handing her the camera. "Okay say cheese fries!"

"Cheese fries!" We chorused with a laugh, the flash going off. She handed me the camera back and I smiled at the picture. We looked like such happy friends. Too bad vampire dickery was going to destroy that soon. Sucks.

"So how did seeing Stefan go yesterday?" Caroline asked wiggling her eyebrows as Vicki left. Elena sighed and Bonnie rubbed her shoulder comfortingly. Caroline's smile slid off her face and she flickered her gaze to me briefly. "What? What happened?"

"Apparently he's on the rebound," Elena said stiffly, grabbing my drink and taking a sip. Rude.

"You don't know when they dated." Bonnie said softly. "I don't think he's on the rebound."

"Yeah, he definitely doesn't look like he is. I mean if he was, it would be all 'distract me' and not all 'let's talk all night about boring things'!" Caroline added with a nod.

"There's a lot more you guys have to discover about each other, it can be rushed or happen overnight." Bonnie agreed. Yeah, Elena, you just are the carbon copy of his ex, nothing to be freaked out about. Totally great relationship. You're human and he's an angst ridden vampire who is boring as hell.

Caroline elbowed me suddenly and nodded toward Elena. Whaaat? She rolled her eyes. "Clare agrees. Don't give up on Stefan before you even attempted a relationship."

"Or at least talk to him and explain to him where you're coming from and how you're feeling," I sighed, pitching in. "If him not telling you things bothers you so much, then give him the chance to be more open. If you shut him out, then you're just as guilty as he is. He didn't tell you something and now _you're_ not telling _him_ something."

"Wow Clare, when did you get so wise?" Elena asked raising her eyebrows. When I took a lot of college psych classes that's when. She sighed. "I don't know… You weren't there. You didn't _see _the way he acted. It was so different… And I thought… that…" She frowned, rubbing her forehead with her hand. "It's just the wrong time for both of us."

"Excuses." Bonnie said shaking her head.

"Definitely." Caroline nodded, resting her chin on her palm. "He really likes you though…"

"Guys it's _fine_." Elena smiled tightly. "I don't want to talk about boys, let's just have a good time."

"Well, you might not want to talk about them, but I do." Bonnie turned, so she was facing me. "Damon Salvatore, huh? I can't believe he walked off with your Minnie Mouse headband." Oh god, no.

"I can't believe he managed to look hot in them…" Caroline murmured with a dreamy sigh. "How did he pull that off?"

"His sex appeal is over nine thousand." I deadpanned, Caroline rolling her eyes at me. "Let's not talk about either of the Salvatore brothers."

"Sounds good to me." Elena agreed, raising _my _drink to toast the idea.

The four of us hung out for a while until the sun started to set and then Caroline dragged me to oversee the distribution of the candles. She made sure everyone knew where to go and had a few of the staff in different locations so everyone could get to the stands easily. I was glad I had Damon's jacket now that the sun had set and had gotten a lot chillier.

"Hey," Matt said warmly, strolling over to Caroline and I, candle in hand. I grinned at him, lighting his candle with mine. "Thanks, Clare."

"Sure. Picture?" I waved my camera with my other hand and he grinned. I ushered Caroline over and I stood between the two, raising the camera up. Caroline and Matt leaned closer, nearly cheek to cheek with me and I snapped the picture, the flash going off. "Thanks guys."

"Don't forget to tag me." Matt said as I turned my camera over to view the picture. Caroline and I were smiling while Matt had scrunched up his face and stuck his tongue out. I laughed. Excellent.

"_Boo_," a voice whispered in my ear and I spun around, finding Damon who was still wearing my headband. I grinning up at him. He leaned back, eyes squinting a little as he smirked at me. "You look good in leather."

"Hey Matt, come with me to find Bonnie and Elena," Caroline said quickly and I turned as she gave me a wink and snatched Matt's arm, pulling him away.

"You look good with a Minnie Mouse headband." I replied. Can this get anymore funnier? I mean, he was a freakin' asshole vampire who delights in killing people, and he was wearing that ridiculous headband. For what? Probably to gain my trust. Basically everyone was a red shirt except Elena.

"_I _look good in everything," Damon responded, snatching my camera from my hands. He turned it around in his hands with an amused look and slung an arm around my shoulders before I could even ask for my camera back. With a gentle tug, he pulled me flush against his side. My heart scattered inside my chest, warmth flooding my cheeks again and he held the camera out, smirking smugly. I bet the bastard could hear my heartbeat. "Smile, Clary." He instructed and I turned my head toward the camera, smiling brightly.

The flash went off and he dropped his arm from around my shoulders, stepping away and glancing down at the camera. I felt chillier now that he moved away and that made no sense. If he was dead, why was he so warm? "So what's the verdict? Do we make a cute pair or what?"

"Sexy as hell." Damon agreed teasingly, pulling my headband off and placing it back onto my head. Did that mean he wanted his jacket back? He lifted the camera and snapped a picture of me. I was certain the flash was going to cause me to go blind. "Awww, adorable."

I was so glad I knew he was Evil Vampire Brother, because I was picking up his taunting, sarcastic, tone. I wondered suddenly if I'd like Damon if I thought he was being genuine or if his flattery and gentleman-y act would irritate me. I knew the only reason I pushed through watching the episodes I did was because of how much of a real dick he was. It was amusing watching him carelessly just kill and mess around with Stefan's plans of True Love and happiness. Now that he was real, I wondered why he made me grin so much. I was like a hundred percent sure I was going to die. And for some reason, that thought didn't bother me so much. As long as I made a big splash and disrupted as much as I could, it would be fine.

"What are you thinking about?" Damon murmured and I looked up at him, his eyes pinning me to where I stood, his expression a mixture of curiosity and a sort of seriousness.

"Secrets." I told him honestly. Damon stepped closer, placing his hands on my shoulders, spinning me around. I stared up at the sky with a sort of awed wonder, the comet was _beautiful_.

"Mmm, seems there's trouble in paradise." Damon stepped back from me and I turned as he handed me my camera back. "Seems your sister and my brother are having a fight of sorts."

I turned my head to the direction he nodded in, seeing Elena walk away from Stefan, blowing her candle out. "Damage control." I sighed and Damon chuckled.

"I understand the feeling. Give Stefan my regards, and call me before you go home, okay? That's my favorite jacket." Damon flashed me a charming grin, somehow my hand already in his. I watched with faint amusement as he brushed his lips against the back of my hand, his eyes glowing mischievously. "Until later, Miss Gilbert."

"Later, D." I gave him a small wave goodbye and made my way over to where Caroline was. She was standing by a picnic table with Matt and freakin' Tyler who was perched on the table, Bonnie had left to go after Elena. I raised my camera and took a picture of them, gaining their attention as the flash went off.

"Hey." Matt said warmly as Tyler gave me that nod greeting. "So… who was that?"

"_That _was Damon, Stefan's brother." Caroline said with a pointed look at Tyler. He sneered back at her.

"I thought you didn't like Stefan?" Tyler said, annoyed. "Girls, you flip flap too easily." I wondered if he was aware of Jeremy's thing with Vicki. I wondered if she was going between them. 'Cause Tyler seemed to be anti-girls today.

"She doesn't like Stefan, but she sure likes his brother!" Caroline said in a singsong and Matt frowned, looking at me. I threw Caroline a look that she smirked at. Damn it.

"You don't like Stefan? Why?" Matt asked, sounding concerned.

"Maybe because the dick doesn't leave her alone when she asks him to?" Tyler offered with a hint of irritation. "I might not remember it, but he apparently bothered her again after I told him to fuck off. She was texting me about it for the majority of the night." Sure, act like we're pals _now_. Tyler was confusing me. Matt looked thoroughly annoyed by this tidbit of information.

"Oh no that was just a misunderstanding." Caroline said quickly with a nervous laugh and Matt narrowed his eyes.

"I just think he's a bore, and he's only trying to get on my good side so he can date Elena. I find that rude." I explained with a sigh.

"She hasn't even given him a chance, he's been nothing but nice." Caroline said over me and I pouted. Way to not have my back.

"Yeah but Clare doesn't dislike people without a valid reason, so…" Matt shrugged. Whoops! "To be honest I just gotta get to know him before I make any kinds of judgment on him." Matt was officially cool, that was a kind thing to say.

"I respect that. I doubt you'll have the same opinion as me. It's just one of those things. Maybe he's the opposite of a soulmate. He's my hatemate." I said cheerfully causing Tyler to snort.

"Only you come up with these bizarre things to say…" Matt said with a grin, shaking his head.

"Oh hi, Stefan!" Caroline said loudly and I turned, seeing the vampire approaching us, nodding a greeting to Matt. Why do boys _do _that? What the hell?

"I was just talking badly about you." I greeted, displeased when he looked amused. Why can't he be offended I was being such a bitch? "Don't worry, nobody shares my opinion."

"I do." Tyler announced but I ignored him. He was just a tool.

"Wanna watch the comet with us?" I invited, ready to freak him out with Damon talk. Stefan looked surprised I was inviting him to be a part of the group.

"Um, actually we're about to head into the grill," Caroline said apologetically, looking down at her phone. "Sorry, Stefan." Oh. Wow. He wasn't invited. Elena probably wanted to talk _about _him.

Stefan nodded. "Of course." His gaze tilted back to me. I flashed him a smile.

"Oh! Your brother wanted me to tell you he says hello." Inwardly I was cackling. "He's a really sweet guy, Stefan, you should try to patch things up with him. I mean, he defended you. That's true family." Suck it. Suck it, suck it, suck it. You suck Stefan I hope this bothers you.

And it did!

"It's true," Caroline suddenly gushed and I could have hugged her. She was just pouring salt into the wound and it was fantastic. "He even let her borrow his jacket!"

Stefan looked _pissed_ and Caroline exchanged a glance with me startled. Holy shit, Elena totally had a reason to be a little freaked.

Clenching his jaw, Stefan coldly said, "Excuse me." And walked off in the opposite direction. Jesus Christ.

"Wow." Matt whistled. "That's some serious bad blood between him and his brother, huh?"

"They must've dated the same girl." Tyler snipped. Yup. He definitely knows about Jeremy.

The grill was much warmer and I shrugged out of Damon's jacket. I was sitting between Bonnie and unfortunately Tyler. Elena had just brought drinks over (as it was seriously understaffed for all the people that was there tonight) and was standing behind me, pulling a chair up to sit between me and Bonnie. I saw Jeremy walking over and brightened.

"Hey J!" I called, Tyler scoffing next to me.

"Hey," Jeremy said sounding a bit rushed. "Has anyone seen Vicki?" I frowned. Was this the part where she gets turned into a vampire? I definitely remember her vamping out at one point.

"You're her stalker," Tyler bit out sarcastically. "You tell us." Anger slapped across me.

"Dude, back off." I snapped and he glared back at me.

"I can't find her." Jeremy continued, seemingly unaffected by the bullshit Tyler just said. Matt came closer, looking worried.

"Is she outside? She could be looking at the comet." I suggested with a frown.

"Or maybe she found somebody else to party with." Tyler smirked, throwing Jeremy a nasty look and anger flashed across Jeremy's face. "Sorry, pill pusher, I guess you've been replaced."

"That's uncalled for, stop being such a dick." I said only to be pointedly ignored.

"What's with the _pill pusher_?" Elena demanded and I groaned. Elena, for the love of god, don't even go there.

"Ask _him_." Tyler was just setting a fuse that would explode and I grabbed Elena's arm before she could move.

"You're going to take this asshole's word for it? He's just pissed that his maybe girlfriend is hanging out with J." I said quietly. I did _not _want a scene to happen. Tyler looked like he wanted to punch me in the face.

"Are you _dealing_?" Elena shrugged me off, looking outraged and Jeremy looked at her, offended.

"Elena—" I began and she shook her head.

"Stop defending him!" She snapped at me. "This is serious!"

I shoved Tyler off his stool and he flailed, nearly falling over. "Look at what you started! Stop spreading rumors you dick!" I demanded. "You're a real piece of work!"

"You're one to talk, Gilbert!" He snapped back at me. What the hell did that mean? He brushed himself off and sneered at Jeremy. "She's never gonna go for _you_."

"Guess what?" Jeremy snapped. "She already did. Over and over and over again!" WAY too much information for me!

"Okaaay, awkward!" Bonnie said, looking between the two of them. "How about we just… chill out."

"Shut up Bonnie!" Tyler snapped and she raised her hands, turning away from the scene.

"You slept with Vicki Donovan?" Caroline scoffed with a laugh, Matt turning to give her a _look_ and I had a feeling this was going to explode. "_I mean_, Vicki Donovan slept with _you_?" I tossed Caroline a look and she raised her eyebrows, only to remember that Matt who was staring at her, offended. She offered a weak, guilty, smile.

"No way!" Tyler said, disbelief in his voice and Elena put a hand over her forehead.

So much drama. I guess this was what high school was about. Drama and vampires. So glad I skipped the social part of it back at home.

"And I didn't even have to force her into it!" Jeremy tilted his chin upward and I rose my eyebrows. Um. Okay. Never gonna be alone with creepy possible rapist Tyler. I stood up, grabbing Damon's jacket, wanting distance. Tyler gritted his teeth, staring at Jeremy with a seething rage. Elena gave Bonnie an uncomfortable glance and Caroline scrunched her nose up. Yeah.

"Dude," I said, disapprovingly.

"What the hell is he talking about, Ty?" Matt demanded, stepping even closer and Tyler, sending Jeremy a _look_, straightened.

"Nothing, man, just ignore him. He's a punk." Real nice deflection there, toolbag.

"Right, so, you can call my brother a pill pusher but he can't call you a rapist?" I demanded.

"Oh fuck off, Gilbert, I'm not a fucking rapist!" Tyler snapped and I put my hands on my hips.

"Doesn't matter if you're not, that's how fucking rumors are, so don't spread that shit around or I'll tell everyone you are one!"

"You know what?" Matt said irritably. "How about _all _of you shut up and help me find my sister!" Guilt rushed upward and I nodded, Elena and Bonnie getting up from their seats.

"We'll check the back," Bonnie said, a worried look crossing her face, Caroline following after her.

"I'll check the square," Matt nodded.

"I'll come with you," Jeremy turned to follow him and Elena grabbed his arm.

"Oh no, no, no! _You _are coming with _me_." She said and I sighed. He so did not need this right now. I quickly followed after her.

"Elena," I hissed, coming to Jeremy's other side.

"No Clare!" Elena looked up at Jeremy. "You're _dealing_?"

"I can't believe this." I growled. "You're going to listen to Tyler? That guy is an ass, and Jeremy doesn't need you doing this to him right now, he's worried about his friend and he shouldn't have his own family take some dick's rumor-spreading bullshit seriously."

"Clare, just stop okay?" Elena snapped, dragging Jeremy to the corner of the grill. She turned to Jeremy while I glared at her, pissed off. "Obviously, the tough love speech isn't working!"

"Oh my _god_," Jeremy rolled his eyes. "I'm not dealing! Clare has been the _only one _who is willing to hear me out, there's no talking to _you _and Jenna, because between the two of you—"

"_Clare _enables you!" Elena snapped, cutting him off. Like _hell _I do!

"This is exactly what he's talking about! He's telling you that he can't talk to you and you—"

"How about we send you to a therapist? Where you'll be forced to deal with it, or to a rehab where you'll sit in a group—"

"Rehab?" I laughed sarcastically. "He smokes _pot _Elena, that's no big fucking deal, he's fifteen!"

"His life is falling apart! It is a big deal!"

"And he'll get back on his feet, but he can't do that when you're threatening him with bullshit therapy or rehab! He needs his fucking family to fucking support him!"

"Stop swearing at me, Clare! He doesn't even try to talk to me!"

"Well maybe it's because you're a judgmental bitch who gets dramatic and gives him shitty speeches!" I grabbed Jeremy's arm, pulling him away, fuming. I didn't give a shit if I hurt Elena's feelings. It was bullshit she even took the word of some asshole anyway.

"C, you _know_ I'm not dealing." Jeremy said quietly as we exited the grill and I pulled Damon's jacket on.

"If you were, you'd obviously be splitting the cash with me." I said, trying to lighten the mood and his lips twitched. "You know I'm always going to have your back, J. We're family, and family comes first…" I trailed off. "Even though I just totally chewed out my twin."

"Clare." Stefan slid in front of me and I tightened my hold on Jeremy's arm, who gave me a curious look. Stefan glanced at Jeremy and then to me. "Can we talk…?" He probably wanted to tell me what a deranged psychopath his brother was.

"I'm _really _not in the mood, Stefan." I said shortly.

"Is he bothering you?" Jeremy asked and I shook my head.

"No, it's fine." I muttered. "We'll talk some other time, Stefan." I tugged Jeremy's arm and Stefan stepped to the side, letting me pass.

We circled the square twice, and decided to head back to the grill. Or rather, I would since Jeremy didn't want to see Elena and I told him I'd text him if anybody found Vicki.

Caroline waved me over and I sat down, seeing Matt and Vicki across the grill.

"She took some drugs and Stefan found her wandering. She ripped open her stitches." Caroline informed me as I pulled a chair up next to her. Ripped open her stitches AKA Damon lunged for her throat. Damon Dickery in the works. "So much drama."

I pulled out my phone to let Jeremy know.

"So… what's going on?" Bonnie asked, looking over to me. "Elena was pretty upset and went home."

"She took Tyler's side and I exploded on her." I didn't want to tell them about the family drama. "I don't really want to discuss what was said, sorry. It's just J's going through a rough time and Jenna and Elena leap down his throat. He has nobody supporting him and it's only making him worse."

"Well _you're _supporting him." Caroline said, smiling softly and patting my shoulder. "And Elena should know better not to pick a fight with him if you're around."

Bonnie snorted. "Yeah, remember three summers ago?" She said with a grin and Caroline laughed. "It was priceless. I'm pretty sure Matt got it all on video."

"Maybe you should join the football team and to get you to tackle the opposing team we'll just tell you they've been talking smack about Jeremy." Caroline giggled and I flushed. I really wished I knew what they were talking about.

"Which fight was this?" Testing the waters.

"When you tackled Elena and you both broke your wrists," Bonnie clarified with a grin. Holy shit.

"I remember Elena being so pissed, she couldn't do the cheer routines with us for half the summer." Caroline and Bonnie laughed. Elena was a _cheerleader_? I hoped I wasn't!

Their laughter quieted and I soon realized why. Stefan. He hesitantly approached us, staring at us. "Hey."

"Hi," Caroline greeted cheerfully.

"Do you know where Elena is?" Stefan asked and I wanted to sink under the table and just die. Bonnie and Caroline exchanged glances and I glowered, folding my arms. I hated feeling guilty. Stefan stared at me, obviously picking up on my mood. Stupid vampires.

"Um," Bonnie smiled at him awkwardly. "I think she went home… sorry." Stefan nodded, giving me once last look before he turned. "I'm… gonna give you her number and her email," Bonnie said, Stefan turning back around curiously as Bonnie went through her bag. Email? Who the hell uses email anymore? "She's big on texting and you can tell her I said so." Bonnie wrote the information down, flashing him a smile.

Stefan smiled back. "Thank you." He gently took the paper from her.

Bonnie suddenly went stiff, eyes growing wide and she jerked back, an uneasy look passing crossing her face. Caroline and I glanced at each other. What the hell was this?

"You okay?" Stefan asked, concerned. Maybe Bonnie was getting her witch on?

"What happened to you…?" Bonnie whispered, staring at him in a horrified way. She flinched back and shook her head, glancing at us and then to Stefan. "That's so rude," she laughed awkwardly, standing. "I'm sorry, excuse me." Stefan frowned, watching as she walked away.

Kind of creepy, not gonna lie.

"Yeaaaah," Caroline smiled at Stefan. "She kind of wigs out. It's like her thing." Stefan just stared at us.

"I… understand." He said awkwardly. Yeah I bet he did. "Well, it was good seeing you, but I've gotta go."

"Bye," Caroline and I chorused. "That was awkward." Caroline said just as Bonnie came back, looking spooked.

"Hey Care, is it okay if I get a ride home?" She asked and Caroline nodded.

"Sure, no big deal." Caroline said with a grin, standing. "Especially since your ride ran off due to family draaaama." I snorted, swatting her arm.

"You should probably apologize first," Bonnie said as we headed out of the grill. "You know how Elena can be. She'll pout."

"I called her a judgmental bitch." I confessed and Caroline nodded, Bonnie snorting and rolling her eyes.

"That's pretty mild." Caroline said, sounding amused. "I'd say that's a level four out of ten levels. You two can get pretty nasty." Wow really? For twins we didn't appear to be that close at all, what the hell?

"So…" Bonnie said with a grin. "Did Damon give you his jacket so he has an excuse to see you again?" I gasped.

"I almost forgot! I'm supposed to give it back to him!" I pulled out my phone, scrolling through contacts. There was no Damon in my phone. "He put himself under _sexy_."

"Ah, well, at least he knows it." Bonnie said as we leaned against Caroline's car. I brought the phone to my ear, the two of them huddling closer to listen in.

"_Mmm, yes?_" Damon's voice said from the other end.

"Hey D," I greeted. God this wasn't awkward or anything. "I'm about to leave. Where are you?"

"_Where are _you_?_" He drawled.

"Back parking lot of the grill." I replied, figuring he'd vampire run over here.

"_What a coincidence_." Damon purred. "_See you in a second, Clary_." I snapped my phone shut, pocketing it.

"Oh my God!" Caroline squealed. "His voice is so hot!"

"Can you even _have _a hot voice?" I wondered with a frown.

"Duh!" Bonnie grinned. "And Damon Salvatore definitely has one!"

"Hello, ladies." Damon murmured softly and I jumped, nearly smacking into the car. With a huff, I turned around. Goddamn I knew he was coming and he still gets me!

"Hi," Caroline said with a small smile.

"Hello," Bonnie grinned.

The both of them turned to give me a pointed looks. Way to be subtle guys.

"Hey D," I greeted awkwardly, slipping my camera and phone into the sweater's pocket as I began to shrug off his jacket.

"Since I'm driving Bonnie home, your house, is like, totally out of the way," Caroline said suddenly and I froze, giving her a look. Oh don't you dare.

"It really is…" Bonnie agreed looking fake disappointed. "And Care's already low on gas."

"It wouldn't be any trouble if I drove you home, Clary." Damon said politely and I knew he was grinning wickedly inside. He was probably going to either make me his compelled bitch, or he was just going to kill me. I wasn't sure which was worse.

I stared at Caroline, shaking my head. She was sending me to my doom! Freakin' Christ! She merely smiled and gave me a quick hug. A hug of betrayal!

"Text me when you get home," Caroline said with a suggestive wiggle of her eyebrows as Bonnie hugged me as well.

"Same here. Bye Damon!" Bonnie said, walking around the car to get in the passenger side.

"Yes, bye Damon, it was good seeing you!" Caroline agreed, _WINKING _at me. Can you be _any _more obvious!

"Be safe!" Bonnie called from Caroline's open window and they both burst into giggles. They officially sucked as friends. Leaving me alone with a murderer! I watched Caroline drive off.

My fate was sealed.

"Shall we?" Damon asked and I turned, nearly jumping out of my skin as he was standing directly in front of me. "You scare _so _easily." He smirked, squinting those piercing blue eyes at me. He offered his arm and I felt compelled to slid mine through his.

Get it?

I felt _compelled_.

Because he can compel people.

Oh god, what if I _am _being compelled?!

"Your friends are interesting." He commented on as he lead me down the sidewalk. Probably to isolate me from peering eyes.

"They're never going to find my body." I deadpanned, kind of seriously. Damon snorted.

"I was thinking I'd string it up in the middle of the town." He said and I cracked a grin, despite myself. He tilted his head, staring down at me with those pretty eyes of his.

"Very festive of you." I agreed, trying to shove the smile down. Stop it, self. Stop enjoying time with your murderer!

"Well, I'm in a _very _good mood." He said lowly, dark amusement loudly ringing in his voice. Heaven help me. He stopped in front of a faded blue convertible car that looked like it could be from the 60's. I shouldn't have been surprised when he opened the door for me with a dramatic flair.

I wondered if he was really going to take me home. Other than the radio humming lowly, and the noise from the car, the ride was dead silent. I stared at him in a state of horror and fascination. I had an overwhelming urge, suddenly, to tell him _everything_. He was going to either make me his bitch or kill me, and I just needed someone to know this whole creepy dream thing. And Damon was dick enough to not freak out or give a damn. Exactly what I needed.

"Damon," I broke the silence, my quiet voice sounding loud in the heavy silence. He tilted his head indicating he heard me.

"Mmm? I'm not going to kill you if that's what you're wondering," Damon said pleasantly, sliding his gaze in my direction. He flashed me a wicked smile. "That would be _waaay _too cliché."

I stared back at him, sitting stiffly, my hands clasped in my lap. "Damon, I have to tell you something. It's a secret I haven't told anyone."

"Oh God," he gave me a sympathetic look. "Let me guess, you have weird creepy webbed feet, don't you?"

Amusement flickered to life in my chest and I snorted, trying to keep the smile off my face. "This is supposed to be serious, shh, stop." He playfully rolled his eyes.

"Okaaay, okay. Go on. Tell me. Do I have to pinky promise not to tell anyone?" He asked curiously, raising his hand and sticking his pinky out, wiggling it.

"I'm hijacking this body." I blurted out suddenly, unable to help myself, and he furrowed his brow, turning his head to look at me. I couldn't stop it. "I don't know how. I just woke up and I'm in this girl's body and we have the same name and interests but I'm not her and I'm this chick's twin and she's from this stupid fictional show with this stupid love triangle!" My shaky nerves were on fire with anxiety, my heart slamming against my ribcage.

"Clary, what the hell are you talking about?" Damon asked, sounding far more serious than I've ever heard him. I took a deep breath and burst into tears. Damon slammed on the brakes, and I was glad that I had put on a seatbelt. He turned so he was facing me completely. "Why are you—"

"I'm scared, Damon, I'm scared." I whispered, wiping my wet cheeks with the back of my hand. Damon stared at me with confused, piercing, blue eyes. "I'm not afraid of you killing me, because I know you will…"

"You're the one who came up with that serial killer crap," Damon said with a sigh, throwing a cheeky grin at me. "C'mon, Claryberry, I'm shit with the whole crying thing."

I shook my head. He had to understand! He needed to understand! I had to tell someone! "No, no, no. The TV show was called Vampire Diaries and was about this sad teenager named Elena and this vampire named Stefan who was so fucking lame and filled with angst and she looked exactly like his vampire girlfriend from the 1800s, _which _is so freakin' weird, and then his brother shows up to do vampire dickery things and now it's real and I've been purposely fucking with Stefan because _fuck this_!" I was half hysterical again with tears.

Damon leaned forward, grasping the sides of my face gently and forcing me to look at him. "Clary, I'm going to compel you. Do you know what that means?" I nodded, staring back at him wide eyed. Oh god, no. "Good. Now stop crying."

Immediately, I found myself having no reason to cry.

"You know I'm a vampire?" Damon asked squinting his eyes at me.

"Yes."

"How?" His voice was soft, urging me to answer.

"The TV show." I whispered.

"What else do you know?"

"Elena looks like Katherine. Bonnie is related to Emily the other witch or something I don't know, it was really confusing, I wasn't really watching! And there's a secret council dedicated to killing vampires like a hundred years later, like why is this town so obsessed? And you and Stefan love Elena."

Damon scoffed, rolling his eyes, his hands dropping from my face. "Yeah _okaaay_, I'm not into Stefan's human. Have you told anyone about me and Stefan being the big bad blood suckers?"

"No. Just you. And I wouldn't put Stefan in that category."

Damon narrowed his eyes, leaning even closer. "Why did you tell me?"

"Because you don't give a fuck. You won't freak out. And I feel comfortable around you." I did _not _want to say that to him, but it just came blurting out anyway. "I needed someone to know."

Damon sighed, sitting back in his seat. "You know I've killed a _loooot _of people, right?" I nodded. Damon chuckled, darkly, shaking his head and staring upward. "And you feel _comfortable _with me?"

"Evil brother vampire dickery," I whispered. "And you make me laugh." Oh goddamn it and did _not _want him to know that either. My cheeks flushed. Stupid Damon.

He turned his head so he was staring down at me, his expression blank. "I could kill you. Right now." A sarcastic smile crawled across his face, his eyes darkening. I shivered.

"I know. I knew once I told you I was going to die tonight." It was a no brainer.

"Then _why _did you tell me? Do you have a death wish?" His voice dipped into a threatening growl. Oh, god. My heart skipped a beat and dropped into my stomach. I stared at him with wide eyes.

"Because you're the only one I can tell. I don't _want_ you to kill me, but when I met you in the graveyard I knew you were going to."

He stared at me for a second and his mouth twitched upward.

"This whole time I thought it was amusing but we were both being serious…" He trailed off. "What makes you think I'm going to kill you?" His voice was curious.

"Because Vampire Dickery. Or just for the laughs, I dunno, it's just your thing. Just snap, dead." I frowned. "Why else would you be here? Why else would you bother, other than to drive Stefan up the wall with ha-ha Elena's twin likes me totally gonna lure her into a false sense of security and rip her throat out ha-ha."

Damon snorted. "You are _dead _right."

"Killer."

His lips slid into an amused grin. "Before you came here… what was your name?"

"Clarissa Lillian Everett. I was twenty. Maybe this is hell, I'm a teenager again in high school. And I'm stuck in shitty Vampire Diaries. No Elena I love you after meeting you like three days ago our love is the truest love. I can't Stefan, I can sense you're hiding secrets from me! Goddamn it Stefan, you suck." I scowled.

Damon stared at me, drumming his fingers against the steering wheel. "I have no idea how this could be even remotely possible, but... I think I believe you. Huh." He paused and looked at me with a slight curiosity. "This makes everything a lot more interesting…"

The strange pressure was lifted and I stared at him.

And then I blurted: "Also, Stefan and some dude living with you guys are going to try to put some shit in your drinks that makes you, like… pass out. Some kind of plant. Starts with a V."

Damon stared at me. "You're not compelled anymore, you idiot."

"Yeah, I know. But fuck Stefan."

A slow, dark, smile fluttered across Damon's face. "I think this is going to be fun, Claryberry."

I blinked at him, surprised. "So. You're just okay with this?" I knew he wasn't going to freak out, but I was sure horrible things would follow. Like death. Or being compelled.

"I have no idea how else you'd know what you know. There's not much I can do about it either, and killing you right now really wouldn't be much fun. It'll bother Stefan more if I just hover." Damon tilted his gaze back to me, curiously. "And with you _knowing_…" his grin turned wicked. "It just makes it all the more fun."

"If it's all the same, I'm going to continue to act like I don't know about vampires. Oh Damon's so nice! And then I'll wear a bunch of scarves. I can't take this off Stefan, I just feel so… compelled to wear them, tee-hee-hee!"

Damon grinned, eyes gleaming with amusement. "I'm going to take you home now." He said, shaking his head. "And I totally wasn't going to kill you. Well. Not anytime soon. Stefan is_ so_ pissed and worried, though. Did he give you the stay away from Damon talk yet?"

"Nope. I don't get why he's so insistent that we be friends. I feel an intense burning rage whenever he comes near me."

"Ah, yes. That will lessen a smidge after a hundred years. Don't worry." Damon said sarcastically.

"Yeah, because by then I'll be long dead."

"Hmm, how long do humans typically live for these days?"

"Ten to fifteen years assuming they get the proper grooming, eat the right kibble and have daily exercise." I deadpanned. "Remember, a happy human makes for a happy living situation."

Damon snorted, his arm shooting out to whack mine. Which kind of hurt. Jerk. "You're _so much _fun. Where have you _been_?"

"Not being born in an alternate reality." I replied. "You're old as balls, D."

"And yet I look so damn good." He said as though amazed by his own attractiveness.

"What kind of skin products do you use?" I asked with mock curiosity.

"The blood of the innocent."

I burst into laughter and Damon smirked at me. I calmed myself and grinned widely. This was shit, though, I should not be enjoying myself so much. Soon Damon's car came to a slow stop in front of the house and I realized I never gave him an address. Vampires are such stalkers. He flitted to my side of the car, opening the door, before I even noticed that he had moved.

"I already know you're a mass murdering vampire, you don't have to be gentleman-y, D." I said as he offered a hand, helping me out of the car. He shifted a shoulder upward.

"It's instilled into me, and I can't seem to break the habit." Damon said lightly. "Does it bother you?"

"Does it matter how I feel, Mr. Vampire?" I teased, batting my eyelashes the way I'd seen Caroline do.

"Hmm." He offered an arm. "Allow me to walk you to the door, Ms. Human." I slid my arm through his, amused.

He turned to me as we reached the door which I pushed open widely, dramatically gesturing. "Please, come inside, Damon."

"If you insist," Damon said politely, a wicked grin crossing his face. He clasped his hands behind his back, stepping inside the house.

"Clare?" Jenna called, coming out of the kitchen. "Is that you—oh… Hello." Jenna raised her eyebrows, looking at me curiously. "I'm Jenna."

"Damon," he said charmingly, smiling at her.

"Damon?" She repeated, now amused. "As in, Clare's serial killer BFF? Well. It's nice to meet you. I also think Elena said you were her… friend's brother." Damon pretended to look surprise.

"You mean Ste—"

"We don't use that name in this house," Jenna said quickly, pointedly looking at me and I smiled. Good. "I don't mean to be rude, but I have to get back to the work I was doing. It was nice meeting you Damon," Jenna held her hand out and, of course, Damon kissed the back of it.

"Likewise, Jenna." Damon murmured and Jenna shot me an impressed look before disappearing into the other room.

"I vividly imagine you tearing into necks when you act charming and kiss the back of everyone's hands." I told him cheerfully and Damon squished my cheeks between his hand, shaking my face gently and cooing at me as though I were a dog. I stared back at him. Nice. Real nice.

"So do I." He said pleasantly, releasing my face. "We have _so much _in common! Goodie."

I slid out of his jacket. "Thanks for letting me borrow this even though it was a ruse with dark intentions. I would have been cold as hell."

"Keep it," he said, pulling my hand into his and bringing it to his mouth, his blue eyes twinkling. "It'll be an excuse to see you again." His breath was warm against my skin, a wave of giddiness sweeping over me as he gently kiss the back of my hand. "I'll pine away like a flower seeking the sun on a cloudy day, waiting with bated breath until I see you again, Miss Clarissa."

My lips sprang upward, amusement brimming hotly.

"That's so violent, Damon, my God. There's just blood and limbs everywhere." I grinned cheekily at him and he straightened, his grin matching mine. Winking, he spun around walking out of the house and I shut the door. I then burst into maniacal laughter.

"Clare, keep the demons at bay!" Jenna shouted from the other room just as Jeremy poked his head out, looking at me from the top of the steps.

"C, you got a sec?" He asked quietly and I nodded.

"Always, J," I said, prancing up the steps and following him into his room. I threw myself onto his bed, sprawling out. "Whaaat's up?"

"The ceiling." He deadpanned, shutting the door and sitting in his gamer chair. "I need to talk to you about Vicki. I need advice."

"I don't know if you'll like what I might have to say," I said, resting my chin on my arm.

"At least you can hold a civil conversation and listen to what I have to say." He muttered, rolling his eyes and I threw a pillow at him.

"They'll come around, J. But I'll have your back til they do. Two against two is a fairer fight. And I'm like a mama bear." I sat up. "Okay, so about Vicki. I know she's kind of seeing Tyler."

"Yeah… she kind of on and off again, I don't really get it. I really want to be with her and I don't know what to do."

"Well, is she worth fighting for?" I asked and he hoped his mouth to reply. "I mean, I know your feelings are genuine, everything about you is. But does she bring you to a better point in your life? Do the good times outweigh the bad times? Has she ever hung out with you when drugs weren't involved? Are you happy? Being happy is very important. How often do you laugh together? What kinds of arguments do you get into? Does she ever place your wants or needs above her own? Is trying to be with her make things… worse?"

Jeremy groaned, putting his arms over his face. "Why does life have to be so complicated and difficult?"

"Because you're fifteen and must suffer."

"I don't even know what she _sees _in that douchebag. He treats her like shit, he doesn't care about her, he flirts with other girls!"

"Maybe she's in the same kind of position you're in. She has feelings for Tyler so she sticks with him even if he's no good for her."

"Vicki is good for me, nobody gives her a chance, they don't see the _real _her."

"I believe you, J. But if she's bouncing back and forth maybe you should give her some space to figure out what she wants. Otherwise it'll keep hurting you and confusing her." I stood up, drifting toward the door. Jeremy stood up as well.

"You're right, I didn't want to hear your advice," he grinned. "But it's something to think about, so…" he slung his arm around my shoulders, giving me a one armed hug. "And thanks for always having my back, C."

"We're a team."

I ran into Elena in the hall and she gave me an awkward, hesitant, look.

"Hey sorry I called you a judgmental bitch, you know how I can be." I said casually and she sighed, relaxing. Wow I guess I really was a rage monster. Nice how a simple 'my bad' fixes it though.

"I shouldn't have gone off on Jeremy like that… I just get so frustrated with all of it. I don't know how you do it, but I guess that's why you two are close…" She ran her fingers through her hair.

"Just gotta take a breather, we're all working on it. Things will get better, you know?"

She smiled faintly. "Yeah. So. Me and Stefan are together." She furrowed her brow. "At least I'm _pretty _sure we are. I also heard from Bonnie and Caroline that Damon drove you home. Twins think alike you know. We can plan a double wedding."

Oh dear god. Her serious expression melted into an amused one and I made a face at her. "So not funny, Lena! D and I are sort of friends."

"Just like how Stefan and I are sort of dating?"

"Nope. Night!" I pranced past her.

After getting changed into a pair of Tweety Bird pajamas, and tossing Damon's jacket, my phone and camera onto my bed, I began my search for a laptop. If I had two possibly nosy siblings, where would I hide it?

I lowered to the ground and dug under the bed, pulling out a shoe box and, yes! A laptop! Curiously I opened the shoebox, which held a leather bound journal and an empty bottle of anti-depressants. I took the journal and sat up on the bed, deciding to read it. At least it'd give me insight on this Clarissa.

Her first diary entry was a few weeks after the death of her parents, Elena had given it to her telling her writing helped. In the journal, the other Clarissa wrote about Jeremy and how he'd stopped drawing as she had stopped taking pictures, how she couldn't help but blame Elena and couldn't bear to look at her. It was some serious depressing shit.

I read every word.

And the last entry horrified me. It was a suicide note. I sat frozen. It was dated a day before the first day of school. Nausea struck me, bile and terror rising in my throat. This was… horrible. She took all her anti-depressants.

Didn't she know the damage she would have caused? How many lives would come to a standstill? Elena and Jeremy would have been beyond devastated, Caroline crushed. And they would all feel guilt and anger and hurt for a very long time. …And the events that followed during the show probably wouldn't have happened. Was this why I woke up in this body? To make sure Vampire Diaries stays on course? I didn't even realize I had been crying until I grabbed my phone, pressing it to my wet cheek.

"_Are you looking for a booty call_?" Damon picked up after the second ring and I realized, glancing at the clock, that it was three in the morning.

"Damon," my voice cracked. I didn't know why I called him, but he was the only one I could talk to and I desperately needed to talk to someone about this. I was getting hysterical.

"_Are you crying again? I'm not good with the crying thing. I mean, Stefan does it all the time, crying and singing depressing breakup songs. Should I go get him?_"

"She killed herself." I whispered.

"_Who?_ _Are you calling me because you need me to dispose of a body or…? You can't be vague here._"

"This Clarissa. She killed herself the night before I woke up in this body. I found her journal, and I just… I don't have anyone else I can talk to."

"_Well, that's unfortunate but I don't see how this should be upsetting. It's not like you knew her and nobody knows so it can't hurt anybody._"

…The was true. Huh. I rubbed my wet cheeks, sniffling, an idea springing. If her dying brought me here, then maybe… "D, you gotta snap my neck."

"_A double suicide._" Damon said sarcastically. "_Find yourself another vampire who will do your angst-y work for you._"

"No, I have a theory. If she died and I woke up in her body, then maybe killing me would send me back home. Or bring her back. I dunno."

Silence.

"Damon?"

I pulled my phone back seeing he disconnected. That bitch!

"I shouldn't be so surprised," Damon announced and I nearly shrieked, falling off my bed ungracefully. I sat up, staring at him with wide eyes. How the hell? My gaze flickered to the now open window. Damon smirked down at me. "This room is just so… _Clary_." He bounced onto my bed, leaning against his elbow and snatching up the journal, flipping through. "Morbid. Cute PJs by the way." He teased as I pulled myself back onto the bed. I sat across from him, cross legged.

"So?" I questioned. Was he going to help me test the theory? I couldn't imagine why else he'd show up.

"Your idea is insane, you know that right?" Damon squinted his eyes at me. "But whatever, I'm in. When do you want to do this?"

"Tomorrow. Or, I guess, later today." I said thoughtfully. "And not here. I feel like you'd totally just leave my body here to rot. Let's do it at your place."

"Is there anything you'd like to do before you die?" Damon purred suggestively, walking his fingertips across the bed toward me. I blinked at him. "We could have a sleepover, paint our nails, bond over bitching about Stefan." Amusement flared and I grinned at him.

Apparently Damon wasn't kidding, and I shifted through the bathroom, finding a set of nail polish: blue, pink, red and yellow. I painted my fingernails as Damon, no joke, painted his toenails. I wondered if he was doing this because he was certain I would just be dead tomorrow and not return home. He told me the story of Katherine, who he and Stefan both loved (but Damon loved her more, clearly), Stefan's betrayal, being murdered by their own father, turning into vampires and Stefan tricking him into becoming one. And then dickery Stefan decided to go on killing sprees. This was a lot of shit I hadn't known.

"He's a little bitch," I said after Damon was finished with his story. "You are completely justified, he acts like such a victim. That's lame as hell."

"Mmmhmm." Damon hummed, jutting his foot out. "Tell me I look pretty."

"Breathtaking." I promised, nodding. Inside, I was deeply amused. Damon clearly gave so little fucks about anything that he was up for doing everything.

"Your turn to share." He said with a impish grin. "Sharing is caring, Clary. Tell me _your _life story."

I shrugged a shoulder. I might as well, right? So I did. I told him things I never told anyone before. I told him about my mother and her cold detachment, which led to a lot of anger that I lived in, or numbed detachment. I told him I used to be a horrible person. And then, a few years ago, it all disappeared. Like _poof_, gone, and I was flooded with so many different emotions it was terrifying. I _felt_, and I felt everything. And who I was completely and totally changed.

"It was like a switch," I said, Damon painting my toenails, which was just so ridiculous that it felt normal. "And I got a taste of what real happiness was, and I needed it. It's all I want. I don't ever want to not feel again."

"I'm pretty sure you were going to grow up to be the serial killer." Damon said, rolling his eyes and smirking at me. "Finished. I've created a masterpiece." He bottled the nail polish.

Damon ended up telling me some of the crazy shenanigans he'd gotten himself into over the last hundred years (Damon turned out to be responsible for a lot of unsolved serial killings), and I told Damon other, less serious, aspects of my life. Like my love for the Batman universe. Damon was the first person I ever told that I actually didn't like _Batman_, who was dramatic and filled with angst. I confessed that I was actually a hardcore Joker fan. Not in the Harley Quinn kind of way but in the kind of way that he makes me laugh with his dickery.

"You're kind of like the Joker." I said after a moment, looking at him thoughtfully. He scoffed.

"Hardly. For one, I'm not crazy. For two, I would just kill Batman. And I wouldn't stick to one town. _Or _get caught. I'm better than the Joker." He said and I grinned.

"You have one thing in common. You can't spell slaughter without laughter."

Damon stared at me flatly and shoved me off the bed as I erupted into laughter.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** Still don't own anything, not even Clarissa.

Wow I'm pretty excited you guys like this story so much, and I hope you continue, despite the crazy turns it's going to take!

A huge thank you: Guest (1), Guest (2), CacklingBlasphemy, ty, Willowlux, Dancing under the velvet moon, Sayomi-hime, luvbooks22, Bronzelove, vikki. dillard, Chaos-and-Insanity, Apatu, ooo a jellybean, Alex Kavanagh, DGfleetfox, lee 1280, Peace and Love831, RosesMoon, Pewdspie, MelissaOnTrack111, iheartanime07. You guys are super encouraging!

and to answer ooo a jellybean, the canon plot line is going to change by a lot. Katherine and the originals are going to show up, because hell, they're fun, but it's kind of going to be different and a hell of a lot less... angsty. Hope you guys don't mind.

* * *

Pretty soon it was time for school and Damon decided to leave, telling me to text him when Elena left. I threw on a pretty black shirt with a red cherry blossom tree printed on the right side of it, a layered black skirt that fell just above my knees, a layer of lace under each frill, and trimming the edge of the skirt. If I was going to die, I should look damn good doing it.

"Clare?" Elena knocked on the door, which was locked. "You ready?"

"Gonna bail," I said, unlocking the door and cracking it. "I… um, need a day. A personal day… Just kind of overwhelmed. You know." Gotta go die.

Elena looked like she wanted to argue but instead nodded. "Okay. Well, I hope you feel better." She said and I smiled.

"Me too." I hoped I didn't end up dead-dead.

I quickly texted both Bonnie and Caroline that Damon had been the perfect gentleman and had drove me home and everything was chill. I also apologized for not texting them sooner. The moment Elena left, I texted Damon telling him the coast was clear. While I waited, Caroline demanded I tell her everything that was said and how he acted.

"Dressed for a funeral, hmm? I like it." Damon said casually, appearing in my bedroom and I nearly dropped my phone in surprise. He smirked, flitting to my side instantly. "Time to die!" He said cheerfully, and in one fluid movement I was being carried bridal style, his fingers tapping against the curve of my legs sending a jolt of heat through me. He then threw me out my own window. I screeched, my heart frantically bouncing in my chest and I shut my eyes.

I didn't go _splat_ like I thought I would, Damon somehow already on the ground level, easily catching me. He was smirking big time, all amused like the dick he was. My arms flew around his neck, clinging with a new sense of terror, my heart beating loudly. He walked me to his car, which had the top down, and carelessly dropped me into the passenger seat. My heart bounced around frantically as I took a few shaky, terrified, breaths, trying to calm myself. Holy shit.

"That was fun," Damon said pleasantly and I turned, staring at him with wide eyes.

"Yeah," I agreed, with a slow smile, the rush of adrenaline coursing through my body. "That kind of was…" Totally less expensive than going to six flags and riding a rollercoaster.

"Mmm, I'm going to take you to this diner I heard about. Apparently they make the _best _pancakes." Damon said, starting his car. "After all, I think I should wine and dine you before I kill you. It's only polite."

I gave him a tiny smile. Damon was extremely unpredictable. He was agreeing to kill me, because I asked him to, but sat with me all night to talk, paint nails and now was taking me out to eat? Maybe… just in case I wouldn't wake up home? Or maybe this fit into some other kind of diabolical plan I couldn't perceive.

Twenty minutes later, Damon and I were sitting in a large red booth. He'd taken me to a 50's themed diner, and I was staring down at the glossy menu, my thoughts a million miles away from here. It almost felt… surreal, being here. With Damon. After knowing what sort of vampire he was. Like this could've been a dream. A dream inside a dream and I just couldn't wake up. Maybe every time I went to bed in this dream world, I went further and further into some bizarre subconscious. Maybe I was in a coma and this is what coma patients experienced. Whether that was true or not, I decided to just enjoy Damon's company 'cause the worst he could do was kill me, and I already asked him to do that. After all, Damon's brand of sarcastic, dark, humor was right up my alley and he was fun to hang out with. I was starting to think Stefan and Elena took life way too seriously because, my God, all I do is laugh in Damon's company. And so, yeah, he kills people but… I guess I was still a little detached from reality given it just didn't seem to bother me. These people weren't _real _to me.

"…and that's when I started cross dressing." Damon's voice pulled me from my thoughts, his voice light and casual as if he were discussing the weather. "The 70's were a really crazy time for me. I think it was all the drugs."

I had no idea if he was just bullshitting or not, as I was learning Damon was pretty much open for trying out anything. He might've just said it to refocus my attention back to him, but either way I grinned.

"The first thing I'm going to do when I get back is drop out of school, quit my jobs, and just drive to the ocean." I decided, my fingers dancing rhythmically against the glossy menu as if playing a piano. Tapping my fingers was a habit I tended to do when nervous, or excited. Or bored. In this case, it was out of giddy excitement.

"That's the spirit! To hell with the institutionalized ideals that the man puts on you and all those responsibilities!" Damon agreed vigorously, raising the coke glass to toast my idea and I tapped mine against his. "Be your own, free, self. Do whatever you want! Go wild!"

"I'm just going to sit on sand by the waves and watch the sun come up." I said with mock seriousness.

"You don't strike me as the deep, poetic, type." Damon said, frowning at me.

"I'm a deep person with a lot of intense feels, Damon, you can't possibly understand with your fun carefree attitude of giving none of the fucks." I replied and amusement spilled across his face.

"When did you get here, Stefan?" He asked pretending to be surprised. I cracked a grin.

"But seriously, I'm probably just gonna boogie board. I haven't done that in years, and I miss it." I smiled at the thought, a look of interest passing across Damon's expression, his gaze flickering downward momentarily.

"That's something I've never done before." He mused and I brightened, leaning forward with a large grin. He stared back at me, clearly amused by my reaction.

"Oh you've got to try it! It's so much fun. What I do, is I go past the waves and wait for a fairly big one. After a while, you can figure that out—and you'll probably cut up your legs and hands from crashing roughly into the sand, but it's so worth it." Excitement rushed. "I think I'll try out surfing."

Damon began to hum a terribly familiar tune.

I stared at him. Why did I know—oh. I stilled my fingertips, looking at him, surprised.

"The Fur Elise," he noted, tilting his head a fraction to the right. "I play the piano as well."

An embarrassed smile flickered to life and I shrugged. "It's a habit, it was Mother's favorite and I had to play it so often, for so long that I just kind of… You know, do it without thinking." I said lamely. "Nobody has ever picked up on it though."

"I'm observant." Damon said dismissively and I grinned at him. Yeah I bet.

"As most predators are."

The friendly waiter named John had bounced back to us, smiling at me. "Have you two decided on what you'd like to eat?" He asked pleasantly, pulling out his little pad and pen. I clasped my hands, resting my chin on them and grinned at him brightly.

"Pancakes!"

"Short stack?" He asked and I nodded. He winked, and wrote the order down, turning to look at Damon. "And for you?"

Damon smiled sarcastically at him. "The same."

Waiter John took our menus and I turned to Damon as soon as he was out of ear shot. "You should've ordered what you're really hungry for." I said with a mock concerned frown. "When he comes back, change your order from pancakes to '_you_'."

Damon threw a sugar packet at me and I grinned.

"For the tip I'll write down _run_." He played along causing me to snort with laughter. "Years of neglect and emotional detachment have made you a twisted little human." Damon said in a matter-of-fact way and I shrugged.

"You like it." I said confidently and he flashed a mischievous smirk at me.

"You like it more." He said smugly. "I'm the one who is the monster here, you're supposed to be horrified and try to convince me out of killing the nice waiter who flirts with you."

I frowned at him. "First, you're not a monster. You're a vampire." I began and Damon gave me a strange look, furrowing his brow. "Me being upset about what you eat is on the same level as how hardcore vegans get. They preach to normal meat eating people, call the meat industry cruel and inhumane, and are real fuckin' tools to anyone who doesn't share their lifestyle. And second, I like the way you are, I'm not going to ask you to change or try to convince you—he flirts with me?" He rolled his eyes. When did John flirt with me?

"Let's see if you feel the same way after I kill him." Damon said and I looked at him, surprised. His grin turned darkly amused. "Yes, I'm going to kill him in front of you." I didn't do well with hospital shows like House or Grey's Anatomy, so I didn't think I'd stomach watching Damon eat someone's throat.

"The ultimate test. The results are back and it says: Clarissa's a terrible person. I failed the humanity course." I deadpanned and Damon groaned, his lips twitching upward.

"Stop being so fun to be around, or I might hesitate on killing you so soon." He complained, throwing another sugar packet at me.

So I threw one back.

And soon there were no sugar packets left.

Ha.

John returned with two large red plates and Damon turned to him. "You're going to quit," he said lowly, John staring back at him with an almost dazed look. "And wait for us at the entrance of the woods behind the diner."

John turned around and walked away just as my phone buzzed next to my plate. Why the hell was Tyler texting me? _Threw a football at stefans face_ I snorted. _Good _I texted back. I was surprised Caroline had stopped texting but then I figured Elena told her I needed a day off from humanity.

So I could die.

"Why are you eating them like that?" Damon asked, staring at me like I was the crazy one here, and not him for eating people food. I was ripping the pancake apart into tiny pieces, dipping them in syrup, and popping them into my mouth.

"Because I'm a savage." I answered, tossing a piece at his plate. It landed on top of the butter. Damon had made a miniature like… volcano thing, with the syrup and butter pouring out. I had no idea how he did it. "You sure like to play with your food."

"I'm an artist." He played along with dark grin, his blue eyes narrowing slightly. "I see the human body as a canvas."

"You really like to tear into your work."

"I'm expressing myself." He said with a huff, pointing his fork at me. "It's therapy."

"I imagine you screaming _I'm so happy _before lunging." I giggled and Damon snorted.

Another waiter came over with the bill, which Damon actually paid with cash. I had expected him to compel his way out of it, but whatever. I grabbed some napkins and when he shot me a curious look, I told him it was just in case he was a messy eater.

Damon shoved me out of the diner. So much for being a gentleman.

He also pocketed my cellphone so I couldn't text. There was a thrill I couldn't name that seemed to course through me and I skipped around Damon excitedly.

"You are _such _a child." Damon said snatching my arm, preventing me from skipping. "A child that finds murder exciting."

"I don't find murder exciting, D." I said with a shake of my head, looking up at him seriously. "I don't think I'm comprehending that he's going to _die_. It's more like holy shit vampire."

"Then you're about to have a terrifying wake up call." Damon's smile was dark and predatory. "Hello, John. You're not going to scream, you're going to stand here calmly. Okay?"

"Okay." John agreed and I shivered. I hated the fact that Damon could compel him to just stand there and die. It was creepy.

Damon smirked at me and then turned to John, grabbing him by the shoulders and tugging him closer. There was a sickening clenching sound. The sound of his teeth tearing into flesh made me cringe, but I couldn't look away even as John went limp in Damon's hold. Another minute passed and Damon let John slump to the ground. My heartbeat picked up and I stared at the lifeless body that belonged to John. Guilt flared and a sadness crept up, spiraling through me. Oh my _God_.

My back hit a tree, Damon pinning me, his hands tight on my arms, a cruel grin twisted across his bloodied mouth. My heart jerked and I sucked in a breath. I hadn't even seen him move. It was okay. I could handle this. I released a shaky breath, calming myself. He had just _killed _John and I… wasn't _afraid_. It was irrational, I realized, but I trusted Damon and I didn't know why. He was going to kill me, I always knew he was, but I just felt so _safe_ next to him, even with a John laying there and blood all over Damon's mouth. I _trusted _him. It was official, I had issues.

"See, this is why I brought napkins," I said trying to lighten the mood and confused irritation flashed across his face, a frown forming. "Or… do you still have an unquenchable bloodlust and—"

"What is wrong with you?" He interrupted, furrowing his brow, staring at me like he couldn't understand. His blue eyes flicked between mine. "Be afraid. Be disgusted. Try to run away screaming. I just killed him in front of you. He's dead, Clary. _Tell me what you're feeling_."

"I feel guilty. And I'm sad." I found myself saying, staring at him with wide eyes. "For the people who loved him. I'm sad for the grief they'll feel. I'm so sad that he's dead and I hate that you compelled him. That is the only thing that frightens me about you. But I know this is how you are, and I like being in your company anyway."

His fingers loosened, his expression becoming more confused. "Why?"

"I don't know." My voice cracked into a whisper. "You make me feel like I can say or do anything around you and it'll be okay. Nobody makes me laugh the way you do."

Damon stepped back and the need to blurt out things faded, bringing relief. He was staring at me with the strangest expression, his blue eyes sliding across my face as though he didn't know what to make of me. He snatched the napkins from my hand.

The walk back to the car was silent and I wondered if I ticked him off by, you know, not running away screaming. Or maybe he was uncomfortable with what he forced me to say. He still opened the car door for me though, which surprised me. We sat for a few minutes. He hadn't even turned on the car.

"I'll never compel you again, Claryberry," Damon turned, grinning, and holding out his pinky. "I _pinky promise_."

A large grin broke across my face and I laughed, linking my pinky with his. "Yeah, because I'll be dead." His grin shifted into a sarcastic one and he turned on the car. "Hey, I have a question… When you feed, do you have to stop right before they die, or can you drain them completely?"

"Anne Rice," Damon said happily. "Now I liked her. No, I don't have to stop. I can drink until the very last drop."

* * *

"Okay. Okay." I took a deep breath, trying to shove down the sudden nerves that had sprang up, tangling my insides with anxiety and doubt. We were in a large room, the parlor room or something, I hadn't been listening. "I'm ready."

Damon was standing in front of me, looking amused. "Are you _sure_?"

"Yes." Not really. The possibility of this being the end forever scared the shit out of me. His expression told me he knew how I really felt. "…it won't hurt, will it?"

"Probably not," he replied pleasantly with a casual shrug. I pulled my lip into my mouth, chewing on it. Damon soothingly cupped my face with his hands, sending a flutter through my chest, my skin heating where his skin met mine.

I couldn't help but think how much I liked the way his hands felt. A sense of calm settled and suddenly I was sure again.

"Are you compelling me?" I wondered and Damon gave me a strange look.

"No. I said I wouldn't." He hesitated. "Why?"

"Because everything feels better now." I replied with a frown, confused. Damon merely gave a tiny half smile.

"Hmm." His blue eyes gently drifted across my face and he chuckled sarcastically. "Since I'm never going to see you again, whether you die or go back to wherever, I… feel the same way, about what you said before in the woods. You make me feel like it's okay to be the way I am. You're fun and I like your company."

I stared at him, shocked, and—

Awareness slammed into me and I groaned, a sharp jolting pain shooting through the back of my neck, agony flaring angrily. What the hell?

"Well, fuck me," I heard Damon say sounding shocked, and _fascinated_. I forced my eyes open, hazily staring up at the high ceiling. I was on the floor.

"Everything hurts," I moaned miserably. "What happened?"

Damon was crouched down in front of me suddenly, his blue eyes as piercing as ever, surprise written across his face. "Clary? Is that… are you still you?"

"No Damon, I'm the fucking Easter Bunny." I snapped, my fingers curling against the carpet. I winced and decided not to move. His lips drew back into a large grin. "Why am I on the floor?"

"I snapped your neck." He told me gleefully, amusement dancing across his face. I stared back at him. Oh. My. God.

"…Really?" I asked, a grin spreading across my face. I giggled, despite the pain. "This is so fucking cool. How long was I dead?"

"A few minutes," Damon informed me, smirking. "I haven't even finished my drink."

"I have achieved immortality." I declared dramatically, giddy. "Shit, D, you snapped my _neck_. I think this is one of the coolest things that has ever happened."

"It'd make a great story to tell at a party to one up everyone else." Damon agreed. He sat on the floor next to me, drink in hand.

The giddiness was wearing down, exhaustion seeping across me, clouding my mind. "Fuck, I'm tired."

"Can you get up?" Damon asked, placing his glass on the floor and offering his hands. Fuck. I gave him a helpless look and he chuckled lowly. "This is probably going to hurt a lot." He let me know pleasantly, and pulled me up to my feet. The pain exploded hotly and I hissed, tears springing, my fingers gripping the front of his shirt. My knees buckled and his arm quickly came around me, keeping me standing.

"This sucks!" I sniffled, trying to keep still. Damon gently grasped my chin.

"I'm just going to test something out okay?" He tilted my head back and forth, up and down, and I slammed my mouth shut biting down on my lip to keep myself from crying out. The pain shattered across the back of my neck, tears falling.

"It's becoming less," I choked, Damon staring at me seriously. "The pain."

"You're healing yourself. You shouldn't be able to do that." He frowned. "You shouldn't be _alive_."

"I shouldn't be in Vampire Diaries." I countered with a faint smile. I hissed with pain as he lifted me suddenly, carrying me, once again, bridal style. I turned my head toward his chest. This sucked. But through the sharp jab of agony, I felt the strange flutter in my chest at Damon's hands on my skin. The hell.

"You are the strangest girl-creature I have ever met." Damon said dropping me. I screeched, bouncing on a bed, and hissed, grabbing the back of my neck. God damn!

"I'm not a creature!" I snapped as he flitted to the other side of the bed and plopped down next to me. He stretched out lazily like he totally just didn't snap my neck and then I came back to life, like this was just a normal thing. I realized suddenly that I was in a bedroom which seemed to have another room attached with a bathtub? "Where am I?"

"The place where I seclude myself." Damon said with a grin. "My bedroom. Usually I only bring in girls who I want to get freaky with, not the girls I snap the necks of." He leaned closer, lowering his voice as though to tell a secret. "You're _speeeecial_."

He wrapped his hand around my arm and my heart leap. With a tug, he pulled me down and I landed painfully on his chest, moaning miserably as pain shot through me. His hand slid over the back of my neck, massaging it and I sighed, eyes fluttering shut. I didn't want to move, and if he had a problem with my head on his chest he could just shove me off. But I liked his touch, and I liked hearing—his heart beat?

"D, I can hear your heart," I mumbled sluggishly, feeling much more tired now that I was laying comfortably. "How even?"

"Shut up and sleep."

I awoke to the sound of a TV. Blinking hazily, I stared across the room at the large flat screen on the wall, a frown forming. That's right. Damon snapped my neck. I woke up from being dead. And then he brought me up to his room. I realized suddenly that I was curled around him, my fingers clutching his shirt loosely, my head on his chest. My heart exploded, cheeks warming and I tilted my head upward, finding Damon smirking down at me. I glowered and his smirk widened.

"How long was I asleep for?" I wondered, curiously. I was feeling so much better.

"Four terribly long and boring hours." He said, shifting a shoulder upward. I blinked. He let me sleep on him for _four hours_? Why? "How's your neck?"

I frowned, pressing my palm flat against his stomach and pushing myself upward. Good God, his stomach wasn't at all squishy. Distracted by this fact, I poked it. It was so firm! Amusement sprang and I grinned. "You're like one of those people you see on the infomercials late at night!"

"Clarissa," Damon said snapping his fingers, drawing my eyes back to him. The way he said my name had an unnerving amount of power over me. He slid hand across the side of my neck, my body nearly sighing with a relief I didn't know I needed, and I found this to be strangely… intimate. I flashed him a bright smile.

"Feeling a lot better." It was true. My neck didn't hurt at _all_. Damon stared at me seriously, dropping his hand.

"You've got a hell of a bruise on your neck." He pointed out, tilting his head as though this were the most fascinating thing ever. "Looks really gross." I laughed.

"Maybe you shouldn't have snapped my neck so hard," I teased back, stretching my legs out in front of me. I suddenly wished I wasn't in a skirt.

"Mmm, it's a hard habit to break," he purred suggestively. "I'm used to doing things hard and fast." My phone buzzed loudly suddenly and I glanced around as Damon rolled his eyes, flinging it at me. I caught it. "That kept going off. So I texted back your friends and someone named Asshole that you were with your serial killer BFF, your neck was snapped, and you were sleeping it off in his bed."

I laughed so hard tears sprang to my eyes. Damon merely grinned at me.

"I'm going to take a shower," Damon said sliding off the bed and tossing a remote at me. "You can join me if you want."

"Hey I let you pop my death cherry," I said with a shake of my head. "You don't get to have both in one day you greedy jerk."

Damon snorted. "Whatever you say, Claryberry." He pulled his shirt off, tossing it in a hamper and I blinked.

Stunned.

Damon was _massively _attractive.

"Is it a vampire thing?" I asked, playing with the remote in my hands, as Damon sauntered across the room to a dresser, his jeans lowly hugging his hips, dark hair mussed. This should be illegal. His head tilted, but didn't look away from the drawer he was going through. "The extreme sexiness. Is that a vampire thing, or do vampires only make more vampires out of really attractive people?"

Damon lifted his head, looking amused. "What other vampires do you find _sexy_?" He asked, raising his eyebrows and I frowned, realizing that I only found _Damon _to be unbearably attractive. "Stefan?" I scrunched up my nose and he rolled his eyes with a grin, returning to digging through the drawer. "Unless you know any more vampires you're not telling me about..."

"Yeah, but, I've never found anyone attractive before." I reasoned and as he pulled out a black shirt.

"That's because nobody is me." He said, dropping the shirt at the end of the bed, and unbuckling his belt. "Now you've been ruined, no human will ever compare to the awesome bod that is mine."

I stared at him as a thought swept over me, a grin stretching across my face. Sliding off the bed, I crept toward him and Damon stopped fiddling with his belt, giving me a confused look. "Can I see them?" I asked quietly, staring at him curiously and he tilted his head. "Your fangs." He rolled his eyes.

"You have a seriously limited attention span." Damon said, creepy dark veins appearing under his eyes. He flashed me a fanged smirk and my heart bounced inside my chest. He dipped his head lower, cornering me against the bed post, blue eyes suddenly darker. "Do I impress you, Clarissa?" He murmured huskily, his head so close to mine that his warm breath drifted across my face. My heart stammered as heat spread across my cheeks. Damon tilted his head even more, his hot fingertips sliding across my skin, tangling in my hair and I forgot how to breathe.

Awareness hissed as pain exploded through me and I moaned angrily, eyes fluttering open. I was on the bed, head against the pillow, the remote next to me, the sound of a shower running in the background.

"Welcome back to the world of the living," I heard Damon chuckle darkly from inside the shower. That jerk. I can't believe he killed me again!

"Your real name is Amon but you're such a dick they put a d in front of it." I growled, moodily surfing through the channels.

"Couldn't help myself," he answered cheerfully. "It's so damn fun!"

I found Spongebob and being the easily amused person I was, I giggled and laughed at everything. It didn't matter if it hurt to laugh. And I was suddenly no longer angry at Damon. The power of amusement was strong.

"Are you sure you were twenty before you came here? Because you act like a child," Damon said, the shower turning off and I grinned to myself.

"Technically I'm only five days old," I said cheerfully.

"It explains so much," Damon said slinking back into the bigger part of the room, a white towel hugging his waist as he rubbed his wet messy dark hair with a smaller towel. "Don't look at my sacred virgin body, Clary!" He grinned wickedly and I pointedly looked back to the TV.

"Don't you get naked in my line of sight." I told him and Damon ripped the towel from him. "_DAMON_!" I angrily covered my eyes with my hands.

"That's right, scream my name!"

Despite myself, I dissolved into giggles.

"God Clary, don't be so shy, who cares if I'm naked? I killed you and you came back to life. There's nothing more intimate than that." He murmured and my heart fluttered.

"Not even amazing vampire sex?" I asked starting to feel tired again. "Is it true biting is like instant orgasm?"

"_What_? No. Usually it hurts like hell for humans, it's teeth puncturing flesh, Clary. You can look now, I'm dressed." I dropped my hands from my face. I was just so _tired_.

"Vampire smut lied to me…"

Damon was suddenly hovering next to the bed, looking down at me, his expression serious. "How's your neck feeling?"

"It feels like you snapped it twice." I said sleepily, grinning. "Probably gonna nap soon…"

"That seems to speed up your recovery," he said thoughtfully, his warm fingers sliding over the side of neck and it was like little sparks went bouncing through me. He was being so gentle now, and it was kind of weird. I closed my eyes, feeling exhausted.

The sound of my phone vibrating loudly next to my ear woke me, and groggily I flipped it open, bringing it to my ear. "Mmm?"

"_Clare? Where are you? Did you get my texts?_"

Elena.

"No, I've been sleeping. Sorry. What's goin' on?"

"_Sleeping? Where? You're not home!_"

Oh. Right. Neck snapping. More neck snapping. Naked. "I'm with Damon."

"…_You were with him all day_?"

"Mmhm."

"_She was with him _all _day_," I heard her tell someone in an amused voice. "_You are _so _explaining when you get home. Um, I just wanted to tell you that I have Bonnie over and Stefan is coming for dinner. I want them to bond_."

"Cool. I'll bring Damon. So him and Stefan can work on patching things up." So Damon and I can torture Stefan mentally.

"_That actually sounds like a great idea. I told Stefan to swing by at eight_."

"What time is it now?"

"_Seven_."

Shit I slept so much today.

"Okay. Bye Elena."

"_Bye_!"

I disconnected and sat up, stretching, and looking through the twenty texts. Most of them were from Elena, one was from Jeremy, two were from Tyler, and three were from Caroline. Elena's texts were mostly how are you, what are you doing, I'm having Bonnie and Stefan over for dinner followed by ones that were demanding to know where I was. Jeremy merely told me to fill him in on what I was doing so I texted back: _did things elena would disapprove of tell you later_, Caroline's first text was: _R U WITH DAMON? _Second: _u don't call any1 else serial killer bff omg what do u mean ur sleeping off a broken neck in his bed_ third one: _I know u aren't having sex!_ And Tylers: _I hate that dick _and _wtf are you talking about you're sleeping in whose bed wtf_

I laughed.

I texted Caroline back: _sorry that was damon he's an ass. Been with him all day, call you later ok_

Speaking of Damon… I realized I was alone. I hit his number in the recent calls and he picked up on the first ring.

"_Hello sleepy head_," he said casually. "_Excuse me, Stef, I've got to take this, it's Clary_."

"Where are you?" I asked, my voice thick with sleep. The door burst open and I nearly screamed. Damon grinned at me, shutting his door and flitting in front of me. "Jeez, D!" He snatched my chin sending a jolt through me and he tilted my head around. "I invited us to a dinner Elena is throwing to get Bonnie and Stefan to bond."

"Are you in any pain?" He asked seriously, leaning closer, forcing my head to the far left, his fingers ghosting over the nape of my neck. I shivered.

"No." I said honestly and he looked at me closely for a moment before letting go, his lips curving into an amused grin.

"What time is this dinner?" He snatched my phone from me just as it started to buzz. "Stay focused, what time is this dinner?"

"I am focused." I frowned, holding my hand out for my phone. "And she said Stefan is expected to show up at eight. So I figure we'd go there now. It'd be a fun surprise for Stefan to see you already invited in."

"I could kiss you." Damon smirked, looking thoroughly pleased and I grasped the front of his shirt, using him to pull myself up so I could stand on his bed. He gave me a confused look and I grinned.

"Okay." I said, sliding my hand over his mouth and leaning forward, pressing my lips to the back of my own hand. Damon stared at me, stunned. I plopped back down, bouncing a little, and I suddenly wondered what it'd be like to jump around on his bed. I bet it'd be so much fun.

"It's how Rogue kisses people." I explained with a shrug, my cheeks warming. "You said there was nothing more intimate, so that means if you can walk around naked, I can pretend-kiss you." Damon continued to stare at me with that surprised look. I frowned. "No? Okay, I won't do it again."

"No, yes," he snapped back into reality. "What I'm trying to say is that you _can_…" He trailed off, leaning down, his face coming closer to mine. He shot me a filthy grin. "…But we can kiss for real if you want. We can be _special _friends." His voice was low and suggestive, causing my cheeks to heat up. I pushed his face away and wiggled off the bed.

Which seemed ridiculously high up.

"I'm okay with you killing people, but I'm Disney so that's where I draw the line, buddy."

Damon turned around, staring at me. "You're _not _okay with me killing people and what the hell does that mean?" Understanding suddenly washed across his face as I frowned at him. Of course I was okay with him being a vampire! "The whole _true love_ thing?" He snorted. "You believe in that?"

"Don't _you_?" I tilted my head, grinning up at him. I prodding him in the chest with a finger and Damon's expression shifted quickly into one of faint surprise. "A hundred and something years is a long time to love someone. Through life, through death, and you've only loved one person. True love."

He grabbed my hand, pulling it down so I couldn't dig my finger into his chest anymore. "I'm not exactly Disney, Clary. The whole thing is more of a Greek tragedy than warm happy feelings with a sweet ending." He threw me a sarcastic smile that suddenly seemed a lot more bitter. I threaded my fingers through his and swung our hands.

"When you meet the someone who was meant for you," I sang softly, grinning at him. Damon raised his eyebrows at me. "Before two can become one, there's something you must do!"

"Yeah, getting naked." Damon frowned, looking completely confused, and I shook my head. Oh this was going to be so much fun.

"No, there is something sweeter everybody needs." I drawled out, smiling at him sweetly and I drew a breath. "I've been dreaming of a true love's kiss!" I sang happily. "And a prince I'm hoping comes with this! That's what brings _Ever after-ing _so haaaappy!"

"Clary." Damon tried to cut into my life alerting Disney song.

"That's the reason we need lips so much!" I continued over him, taking his other hand. He linked his fingers with mine and I beamed. "For lips are the only things that touch!"

Ha-ha, I was making a bloodthirsty mass murdering vampire hold my hands and listen to me sing Disney! Ha. Haaa. HAAAA!

"I think I need to explain sex to you." He said incredulously, still letting me swing our hands together.

"So to spend a life of endless bliss, just find who you love through true love's kiss!"

He stared at me like I'd lost my mind. "Are you okay? Maybe you should sit down… I still don't know how you've come back from the dead, still human, there could be side effects…"

I burst into laughter. "It's from a Disney movie, D. Enchanted. Has that come out yet? You should see it!" Relief passed across his face.

"So that whole true love junk was a joke?"

"Kind of." I said seriously, wiggling my hands from his. "Half serious, half not, you know? I'm not saying it has to be love, or true love, I just gotta deeply care about someone before I kiss them. And there's no point in a causal relationship for me. I thought I was asexual until I met you, but you're super pretty, and this whole attraction thing is new."

Damon's face immediately became cocky. "Nobody can resist me."

"Yeah," I agreed staring at him with wide eyes. "Apparently not, super weird. But anyway. If I'm going to be with someone, they'd totally have to be the Mickey Mouse to my Minnie Mouse." I paused and smiled coyly. "But since you killed me intimately, we can hold hands. Feel special."

"You know, the world doesn't work that way anymore." Damon said after a few seconds had passed in which he had just stared at me. Like I was crazy. "You're probably never going to be in any kind of relationship."

"If someone really wants to be with me, then they're going to be willing to respect me and take it slow." I said firmly. "And… honestly… I don't really want to deal with the drama of the whole emotionally attached thing."

"You don't have to get emotionally involved to have sex." Damon said slyly. "And since I'm the only one you're attracted to... Haven't you ever been curious as to what it's like…?"

"Once." I admitted. "But then I got a milkshake from McDonalds and I'm pretty sure that's what an orgasm feels like."

Damon's face exploded into amusement. "I'm sure." He agreed teasingly, shaking his head. "Let's get you a scarf for the bruises. You ready to go, little Miss Disney?"

* * *

"Whatever you do, don't let Bonnie touch you," I was telling Damon as he drove. I now had a pretty black silk scarf! I was sure it was Stefan's. He probably had a secret scarf room. "She's a witch and she'll know. I wonder if she'll know I died twice. Hm."

"Well, she didn't know the other Clarissa died and you invaded her dead body." Damon said with a casual shrug. True. "I'm constantly dead, so…" he trailed off and I realized he was pulling into a parking lot. I stared at the looming building with bright red lettering: _Price Rite_.

I guess it was a supermarket. Like a mix between PriceChopper and Shop Rite. Not clever at all, fictional town. You lose again. Somehow Damon was already on my side of the car, opening the door for me and I hopped out, giving him a questioning look.

"It would be horribly rude if we showed up to a dinner without bringing dessert." Damon said and I nodded. Sounds like a plan.

"Can I have my phone back?" I asked and he smiled, tapping my nose with his finger.

"Nope." He said cheerfully.

"Fine. Then can I at least pick out _your_ dessert?"

"I'm going to hell and you're just skipping after me." Damon shook his head, tilting his gaze upward to the sky.

"At least we'll be able to roast marshmallows together _and _you can go on unlimited killing sprees! Win-win for all eternity." I grinned up at him and Damon's blue eyes danced back at me with amusement, a grin twitching. He squished my cheeks with his hand, gently rocking my face back and forth. I wondered why he kept doing that.

"Shhh, here's your phone," he released my face and shoved my phone into my arms. Three texts! "You're going—"

I slammed into the side of the building falling backwards hard on my butt and Damon busted out into loud laughter which sent me off into a fit of giggles. Laughter was contagious that way for me. He swayed and stumbled over to me, laughing so hard that he didn't seem to be able to stand right.

"Clary, shit," he managed between breaths, grinning widely down at me. "I can't believe you actually—actually…" He stilled suddenly, eyes snapping to me. "Are you hurt?" My giggles faded and I frowned at him.

"Well, my palms hurt but only 'cause I used them to break my fall." I said with a shrug. "Nothing big. After breaking my neck, I can deal with—oh." I turned my hands over, staring down at my now red palm. It was just a lot of little tiny scraps. "Can you resist the temptation?" I asked with mock seriousness, looking back up at him.

"No." He deadpanned, his expression flickering. He flashed his fangs at me. "I vant to suck your blood." His terrible Dracula impersonation shattered any attempt at keeping a straight face, and I burst into laughter again.

Damon smirked and offered his hands which I took. He pulled me off the ground and I patted my skirt down, handing him back my phone. I obviously couldn't be trusted with it. He turned my hand so my palm was facing up and I opened my mouth to ask him what he was doing, only to close it. The little scraps were _closing up_. I froze, fear jerking through me. Oh. My. God. Why can't I just be in Vampire Diaries and not have some scary unexplainable shit happen to me?

"This is really creepy." My gaze flashed up to Damon, eyes wide, as he started back down at me seriously. "Why is this happening? Do you think… Do you think I came into this body so Vampire Diaries stayed on course? And now I can't get damaged so Elena stays happy and not be devastated and can be with Stef—"

"Clary, do me a favor, and forget about the damn show." Damon snapped, grabbing my shoulders and staring down me, a flash of irritation crossing his face. "That was fictional, this is reality, I'm not a damn actor reading lines to a scripted plot, and there is no way in _hell _you're here for _Stefan's _ensured happiness. You're here to wreak havoc. With me. Not being able to die is a fancy plus. Okay?"

"Damon?" I whispered, wide eyed and he tilted his head. "Wouldn't it be funny if you snapped my neck right now?" His serious expression twitched into amusement and he rolled his eyes, spinning me around and pushing me through the automatic doors.

"You are a sick, sick, little human." Damon murmured in my ear. "And I _like _it." Warmth spread through me and I just couldn't understand why Damon's words affected me this way.

"Do vampires go on frenzies when girls are on their periods, with all the blood and—"

Damon shoved me to the side and I bounced, flailing and falling into a pyramid of chicken noodle soup cans which all went crashing down, going _everywhere_. I landed on the floor pretty hard, my butt was so freakin' sore. Damon immediately burst into laughter again, and easily pulled me back to my feet.

We quickly walked away before anyone came to yell at us.

"This is a legit question. I mean, you can smell that stuff." I really wanted to know. "Doesn't it smell awful? Gross. So gross."

"Blood smells like blood." Damon said after he calmed down. I guess me falling down was the funniest thing in the entire world. I think he just liked seeing pain. Because he was sick. "And it depends. I can control myself. Stefan probably can't, he's probably going to avoid Elena. For the entire week."

"What a horrible boyfriend."

"The worst."

* * *

"And I'm telling _you _to trust me," I argued, hands on my hips as Damon stared down at me like I was crazy. "Ice cream cake is the way to go."

"We are _not _getting cake." He refused flatly. "This isn't a party, it's a relaxed social dinner!"

"Have some imagination, and take some risks! I've done this before, and I'll bet you anything that you'll find that my way will be amazing and everyone will be like yay thanks!"

"I will snap your neck." He threatened in a singsong kind of way.

"Oooh I'm so scared. It's not like you haven't done _that _before. Go ahead, veiny eyes," I spread my arms out. His lips twitched. "Do it. Right here. I bet you won't. No balls."

A taunting smirk flew across his lips and he drew closer. "You want to play this game, little human? Hm? You think I won't?" I jutted my chin upward, prodding his chest. He snatched my hand and jerked me against him. Tiny explosion went off inside me, my heart leaping. Why did that keep _happening_?

"And how will you explain it? Sorry Elena, I just snapped your sister's neck out of a vampire homicidal rage over cake. She is a body snatcher, BTW, and has to lay down for four and a half hours to heal." I pushed against his chest, grinning widely. "Admit it, Salvatore, you—" I screeched as he picked me up by my waist. "Damon!"

He carelessly dropped me into a cart that didn't belong to us and I whined, pain shooting through me. I threw some items out of the cart, which Damon snorted at, and I staggered to my feet. I swayed and grabbed onto the handle to the glass refrigerator that kept the cakes in. He was next to me instantly, slapping my hand.

I slapped his back.

He slapped mine harder.

I slapped his harder.

He whacked it and I hissed, tears springing as a sharp pain shot through my arm. I brought it quickly to my chest, massaging it with my other hand, giving him a hurt look. "I think you broke my wrist! It hurts like hell, Damon, you dick!" I didn't actually think that, but I wanted him to feel bad!

"It'll heal." He said indifferently. He pushed me back down and I screeched, flailing and landing hard on my butt. Again. I was going break my ass one of these days. Damon whistled, pushing the cart like this was just so totally normal, and grabbed an apple pie off the shelf.

I puffed my cheeks out, pouting. I didn't want apple pie!

* * *

"Hello, hello!" I called warmly, throwing open the door to my house dramatically. I was feeling really good, and I was pretty excited to ruin Stefan's night. Damon followed me in, closing the door behind us.

"We're in the kitchen!" Elena called and I led Damon into the next room over. Elena and Bonnie were at the island, two trays of take-out baked ziti and salad in front of them. They were putting the food into pretty bowls. Maybe to make it look like they cooked it?

"Hey Clare, hi Damon, it's nice to see you again," Bonnie greeted, sending me a not-so-subtle grin. "You're dressed up really cute today." She gave me a look that was an obvious _WAS IT A DATE _stare.

Nope, I'm dressed for my death that didn't happen. "Thanks."

"Mmm, yes, hi Damon!" Elena sounded way too cheerfully, a large grin stretched across her face. I frowned at her as Damon placed his nasty apple pie on the table.

"Hello Elena, Bonnie," Damon flashed them an oh so charming smile. "It's wonderful to see the both of you, thank you for inviting me."

"Of course," Elena smiled warmly. "I'm glad you came." She then sent me a pointed stare. "So I hear you and my dear lovely twin spent the day together. Did you guys have fun?" Elena was fishing, it was so obvious she wanted to know what I had done today.

"Mhm, Damon has a wicked sense of humor, he kills me." I said with a smile. Damon shot me an extremely amused look, eyes gleaming, before turning back to Bonnie and Elena. He grinned widely.

"I really murder her, it's hilarious." He agreed, cheerfully. Amusement brimmed loudly, rising upward. This was just so much _fun_.

"I just keep getting up for more." I grinned, trying to keep back the hysterical laughter and shrugging my shoulders.

"She's been dying all day."

"His idea of amusement should be criminal."

"It's neck snapping."

I burst into giggles, unable to keep it at bay anymore.

Bonnie and Elena stared at us and then at each other. I was trying calm myself down from my fit of laughter while Damon merely grinned at them pleasantly.

"Okay, you guys obviously have an inside joke." Elena said, putting her hands on her hips, a soft smile on her lips as she looked at Damon approvingly. The doorbell rang and I bounced.

"I'll get it!" I said, skipping into the main room, flinging the door open. Stefan stood outside, looking surprised and I, still in the left over amused mood, smiled brightly.

"Yo Stefmiester!" I greeted brightly, swatting him across the chest with the back of my hand. "Welcome to the paaar-taaay!" I was a little hyped up from the amusement that still lingered and the sheer horror he'd have once he realized Damon was here. Stefan looked like he wasn't sure if he should smile or be concerned.

"Hello Clare," he said politely, inclining his head a little in greeting. "May I come in?"

"Nope," I swung the door shut and pranced back into the kitchen. Elena huffed, shooting me one of her _looks_, and brushed past me to let StuffySteffy inside. I shrugged. "Telemarketer."

"Hate when that happens," Bonnie said with an amused tiny smile, picking up the plates. Damon twirled in front of her, and, careful to not brush his fingers against hers, gently took the plates from her.

"Allow me to help you with that, Bonnie." Damon said with a charming grin and she smiled at him.

"I hope you don't mind Clare is going to be joining us," I heard Elena say. Wow thanks. She was leading him back into the kitchen as Damon purposely popped into view causing Stefan to freeze. Elena didn't seem to notice. The vampire dickery begins. "She invited Damon along."

Hah. I spun back around to help Bonnie, who was bringing over the silverware. I grabbed the bowls the food was in.

"Hello Stef," Damon said pleasantly. "Hope you don't mind that Clary and I are crashing Elena's dinner party."

"Oh no, please, don't worry about it." Elena laughed, waving her hand dismissively. Stefan's face said otherwise. "You're not crashing anything. We're happy you're here, anyway."

"He means social casual dinner," I corrected and Damon shot me a look. "I mean if it were a party, one would expect _cake_."

"Cake is a lie, Clary." Damon threw back and my mouth flew into a surprised, amused, grin. Portal references!

Bonnie looked between us with her eyebrows raised. I quickly skipped over to the fridge, opening it. There was no reason for her to give me any kind of suggestive stares! Oh, Pepsi! I pulled the bottle out and set it on the counter. Hell, yes!

"What are you doing here, Damon?" Stefan asked, stiffly. I mean, jeez, can't he at least pretend to be friendly? I wondered where the cups were. I began opening cabinets. "Don't you have… something to do?"

"Third, to your right," Bonnie said quietly, coming to stand next to me, and I shot her a surprised look. She grinned. "You're looking for the glasses, right?"

"Clary invited me." Damon said pleasantly. "I took her out for breakfast this morning, and she's returning the favor. I thought it was very _sweet _of her."

"How'd you know I was looking for them?" I asked Bonnie, finding that she was totally right. "And how come you know and I don't?" Oh God, she knew my secret! "I mean, I _live _here."

"Is _that _what you guys did?" Elena said sounding curiously excited. "Wow, that's really nice of you. Where did you go?"

Bonnie laughed, slinging an arm over my shoulders. "Clare, you are the most unobservant, distracted, person I have ever met. You're totally ADD, I'm sure you still get lost in your own house."

What a great cover story. I reached for the glasses, but Damon beat me to it. I was taller in this body, but still considered short and that really sucked. I wondered why the glasses were so high up anyway. Since I was short, they should all be considerate. This family sucks!

"We went to the 50's diner twenty minutes from town." Damon said, easily grabbing five glasses. "Best pancakes ever." And John. Poor John.

"They spent the day together," Elena said with a wide smile and Stefan's gaze flickered to the scarf I was wearing. Ha. Ha. Ha. HA.

With the table set, I chose to sit next to Bonnie, Elena sitting at the head of the table, forcing Stefan and Damon to sit next to each other. I was told I had a limit of two glasses of Pepsi given it was so late and pie was for dessert. That bothered me. I lived off of sugar. I also wondered where the hell Jenna and Jeremy were at like eight o'clock at night. This was feeling ridiculously grown up. We should be eating McDonalds and bitching about school. I mean it looked like we were drinking wine from glasses and nobody was home so it's like this was Elena's adult house with adult friends! So boring!

"So I heard Tyler threw a football at you today," I said as I helped myself to the baked ziti, pointedly ignoring the salad. Bonnie and Elena looked up at me surprised.

"How'd you hear that?" Elena asked, furrowing her brow. "You weren't even at school."

"Ah, the Lockwood connection." Bonnie said with an amused grin. "He's been texting her." Damon seemed to brighten at that. I wondered if the Lockwood family was important.

"So did you get smacked in the face or what?" I wondered causing Bonnie to snort and Elena to throw me a furious look. "That would've been hilarious. If you got hit in the face, I would have loved to see that." Stefan decided to look amused to my attempts of being a bully.

"Actually," Elena said loudly. "Stefan caught it."

"Oh, how boring." Damon sighed, grinning. "Let me guess, he impressed a football couch, blah, blah, blah football."

"Aw that _is_ boring. Don't be cliché, Steffy." I agreed. "Elena a cheerleader, you a football player. Big time boring."

"_You're _a cheerleader?" Damon asked, tilting his head to look down the table at Elena who smiled tightly, clearly uncomfortable by the subject. "You don't look too happy about it."

"I used to really love it, but I…" She trailed off with a shrug.

"So quit." Damon and I said at the same time. Wow that was weird.

Bonnie laughed. "Speaking in stereo now. Nice."

"I can't just _quit_." Elena said with a faint smile, shaking her head. "It's been a huge part of my life. I just have to… get past this funk, and it'll be better."

"Not really." Damon said causing Stefan to shoot him a look. "If you're not happy about something, change it." Damon smiled sarcastically back at Stefan. "Stef could learn from that. He just sits there and watches the world passes him by."

"Well, I'm on a team now, so, no, I didn't watch the world pass me by." Stefan replied coolly.

"I don't know, I feel like… I can't just let my whole life stop or change just because I—we—" Elena's eyes flashed to me. "Lost our parents."

"We can relate." Damon said softly. "It feels like we've watched everyone we've ever cared about die."

I choked on my drink. Damon, oh my GOD! He's just so blunt!

"Damon," Stefan snapped coldly. "Let's not talk about that."

"Oooh, sorry." Damon grimaced as I smacked my chest, trying to get the soda down properly. Bonnie gave me a concerned look. "Didn't mean to bring up _her_."

"Oh my God," I burst out laughing.

"_Clarissa_!" Elena hissed. "I am so sorry about her, it's the soda. Bon, take the drink away."

"I'm sorry, that was just ridiculously Batman-y to say." I said calming myself, easily pulling my drink from Bonnie. "I'm sorry—really." I offered a small smile to Stefan. "I know what Katherine meant to you, I'm sorry you had to go through that, Stefan." Damon might as well be cackling and rubbing his hands evilly.

Stefan _stared _at me, stunned, and Elena, who was rising in her chair, slowly sat down, looking from Stefan, to me. "You know about Katherine?" She asked.

"I like Clary," Damon said flashing me a charming grin but I couldn't help but remember how his mouth looked like covered in blood. "I think we can really become good friends, so I told her some things about my past and she told me about hers."

"How did she die?" Bonnie asked softly. "If that's not insensitive to ask—God, it didn't happen recently did it? I'm being rude, I'm so sorry."

"No, no, it's alright." Damon said with a reassuring grin. "Feels like just yesterday. It was… a fire. A very tragic fire."

"What was she like?" Elena asked quietly, shifting her gaze toward an annoyed looking Stefan. "Is it okay if we talk about her, Stefan?"

"It's just as difficult to talk about it for Damon, too." I frowned, and tapped my fingers against the table as if playing Queen's _Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy_. It wasn't one I had played often so I needed to think about it. This dinner was making me feel anxious, too much tension, and I needed an outlet. "Stefan isn't the only one who lost her." Seriously. And Stefan is totally freakin' over her, Damon _still_ loves her.

"You both dated her." Elena realized and Stefan threw Damon a dark look, sitting back in his chair.

"Okay can I just say, this is kind of getting awkward," Bonnie cleared her throat. "I'm sorry. Can we talk about something…"

"Less couple-y alone time talk?" Damon suggested shooting Bonnie an understanding smile. She nodded, relaxing. "Say the word and your wish is my command." He tilted his gaze toward me with a little smirk and I stilled my fingers.

Damn it.

How did he _know_? I mean, Queen wasn't even something common you'd play on the piano anyway!

"Well…" Elena drew her eyes to her friend. "Bonnie, tell Stefan and Damon about your family." Bonnie gave her _the look _that I usually receive from Elena. Ha, good.

"That isn't much to tell." Bonnie said coolly. "Parents are divorced, and I live with my dad."

"Oh, come on," Damon encouraged with a grin. "Everyone has story to tell. We just brought up how Stefan and I dated the same girl who died in a fire, so what's _your _story? Doesn't even have to be a dark, tragic, one!"

Bonnie's smile grew. "Okay. Well, apparently, there's a long line of witches in my family."

"Your secret is completely safe with me," Damon said with a wink. "I know how small towns can get. Pitchforks, torches," he shivered. "Horrible." Bonnie grinned widely and I wondered if it was a good idea for her to be openly talking about it. Let's just tell everyone about the witch factor!

"Any chance you come from the Celtic Druids that migrated here in the 1800s?" Stefan asked, looking at her curiously.

"Why is this town obsessed with the 1800s?" I wondered out loud. Like Jesus Christ. Everything is that one freakin' year. Damon's mouth twitched and he lightly kicked my foot with his. I cracked an amused grin.

"My…" Bonnie looked at me oddly. "Family came from Salem."

"Ah, Salem." Damon murmured.

"That's actually really cool." Stefan said, finally sounding enthusiastic and Elena smiled, looking between the two.

Seriously, though, Stefan, he needs to pick up his game. Damon is doing circles around him in the charming department. And if a sadistic killer can play the part of charming, then it should be twice as easy for someone who is the _hero _of the story.

"Really?" Bonnie perked up a little. "Why?"

Stefan got into Professor Stefan mode. "Salem witches are heroic examples of individualism and non-conformity." What every teenager everywhere wants to hear, good job. Bonnie straightened, looking pleased.

"Yeah, they are." She agreed, smiling at him widely.

"Hey, Steffy, after high school, I think you should consider majoring in history." I mean, you know, if he wasn't a vampire. "You're excellent with your dates, you seem to have a real passion for it, and you can make anything sound like… you were there for it, personally. You know?"

Stefan's smile slid off his face while Damon grinned at me.

"You know, she's right," Bonnie agreed. "You really shut Mr. Tanner down twice now."

"Twice?" I asked and Elena laughed as Stefan grew more uncomfortable looking.

"Uh-oh. Am I going to receive a call about this, Stef?" Damon teased. "Talking back to adults? Shame."

"Mr. Tanner kept throwing out major historical events and Stefan knew all the dates for them! Mr. Tanner even got one wrong! It was _hilarious_!" Elena gushed, putting her hand on Stefan's arm.

Idly, I tapped my fingers against the table. The conversation was becoming boring and I had been sitting here for way too long. I wondered where Jeremy and Jenna were. It was getting late. What did Jenna even do? What was her job? It must be a good job if she could afford this house and three teenagers. And where was Jeremy? How did he get around town? Did he walk? Did he have a car?

Did I have a car? Elena had a car. An expensive looking car.

Was I allowed to _drive_?

Nobody ever let me drive in my old life. The easily distracted thing kind of set people off. Like the max times anyone ever let me drive them was once and then never again. I also had a little bit of road rage. Like this is my road, get lost. Plus I was short. Like really short. I wasn't as short here. I mean, I was short for my age, still, in this body, but still much taller than how I was.

I wondered what video games were coming out. Were there any really good ones this month? Maybe I should go to the mall and check it out. I bet that was something me and Jeremy could do. …Did this town have a mall? And if I could drive, would Jeremy think it was suspicious I suddenly didn't know where anything was? Or would that be okay 'cause if this was my normal life I'd still be lost without a GPS. It's the easily distracted thing, I can't pay attention for shit. I get lost for hours even with a GPS. I just can't seem to pay attention when it's talking to me!

But that's because I put it in a different language hoping I'd learn German. I just ended up getting more lost. And I know it has arrows but it never works out for me.

"Clarissa Sunny Gilbert!"

_Sunny_?

I blinked, looking at Elena who was staring at me, annoyed. I giggled. _Sunny_? My middle name here was _Sunny_? What a hippie name! This is _too _funny! Funny-SUNNY! HA! HA!

"Clarissa!" Elena repeated and I snapped my attention back. "Did you just zone out on me again?"

"No." I promised, grinning widely.

"What did I just say, then?" She demanded, raising her eyebrows. I smiled at her, sweetly.

"Nothing worth remembering, clearly." I wiggled out of the chair, stretching my arms out. "I'm bored! This has been so boring! Elena you throw boring social gatherings. It goes along with your boring boyfriend."

Stefan cracked a grin at me while Elena looked ready to crawl over the table and stab me. "Thanks, Clare." Stefan said with a laugh. "Next time I'll remember to juggle knives while we eat, to keep you entertained."

"Nope." I said dismissively and Bonnie patted my hand. "Only if they impaled you would I be entertained. It's my house, peasant. You've been a terrible guest, get out." Why was he _laughing_? This wasn't _funny_. I was serious!

"Don't mind her, she gets cranky when she sits in one place for too long." Bonnie said and Damon hummed.

"I find that isn't true at all," he said pleasantly with a shrug causing Elena and Bonnie to give him stunned looks. Stefan's was worried. Probably thought I was being compelled to sit still—oh GOD, _imagine_? I would die, mentally.

"Damon you could be a limbless mime and you would still be the most interesting man in the entire world." I piped cheerfully and Damon snorted. "Are we done with dinner? We should save this for J. Where is he? Let me get the tupperware."

"I think he said he was going to play pool at the grill," Elena sighed and I frowned. What fifteen year old goes to a bar like place to play pool at eight o'clock on a Friday night?

"What is wrong with this place," I huffed, opening drawers, looking for tupperware.

"It's in the cabinet next to the fridge, Clare." Bonnie called and I gave her a thumbs up for being awesome. Bonnie can be my real life GPS.

"No, no, Clare," Elena sighed, placing a hand on my shoulder. "I'll do it. I'm going to clean up real quick, and I'll put some aside for Jer. Just entertain Stefan in the living room, okay?"

"Okay." Hey if she wanted to do all the cleaning by herself, I wasn't going to be one to stand in her way. "Stefan! Come with me to a land of pure inebriation!"

"I think it's _imagination_." Stefan corrected with a soft smile and I skipped past him.

"Yeah it would be if you had any," I agreed, locking arms with a laughing Bonnie and pulling her into the next room over.

"God, Clare, you really don't give him any breaks." She said. "Just one after the other."

I bounced into the large chair, swinging my legs so they hung off the arm. "Because he's the hero Mystic Falls deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So we'll insult him. Because he can take it. Because he's not a hero. He's a silent guardian, a watchful protector. A dark knight."

"Where is that from…?" Bonnie asked, sitting in the other chair as Stefan decided to sit on the couch having the audacity to laugh. Not in my house.

"The Dark Knight." He said, nodding to me. "A good movie. So you hung out with Damon today?" Ah, here it is. I bet he's exploding with questions.

"Mm." I lifted a shoulder upward, making a noncommittal noise. Work for it, Stefan. Work for it. He scooted all the way to the end of the couch, resting his elbows on his knees and leaning closer.

"What did you two do?" He asked, looking all concerned and interested. I leaned closer, hanging off the arm of the chair.

"Unspeakable things." I whispered. He stared at me. I grinned and sat up properly, swinging my legs out in front of me.

"Elena said you were sleeping when she called." Bonnie said with a frown. "It's not like you to nap during the day, you're usually so…" Hyper? Bouncy? Awesome? Not cat like? "Energetic."

"I wasn't feeling good." I said dismissively with a wave of my hand. "It happens."

"Well." Mr. Stuffy Vampire corrected and I threw him a look.

"No, Stefan, I wasn't feeling good. I was feeling evil." I deadpanned and his mouth tilted upward. Stop being so amused. God, why is this so difficult? The more I want him to not like him, the more he tries to.

"I'm… actually gonna go see if Elena needs help," Bonnie said, standing, and leaving.

But why? Why was she leaving? She had no reason to go!

"Clare," Stefan said quietly tugging my attention away from Bonnie's retreating form back to me. "How come you weren't feeling well today? Did something happen?" Yeah I died twice.

God, Stefan, way to be awkward at me.

"I didn't sleep much last night." I said. Actually, I realized, I didn't sleep at all. "Your brother was super cool about letting me nap, though."

Stefan only continued to stare at me like I was some sick person dying in the hospital but in a lot of denial about it. "That's a really nice scarf you have there. You know, I've never seen you wear one before." Because you know me _so well_. "Is it new?"

I stared back at him. "I know your secret Stefan." I said with mock seriousness and he froze, eyes wide. "Yup. Today me and D talked about it. You've got a serious scarf fetish going on, I know about the secret scarf room that you have. This is your scarf."

Stefan stared at me incredulously, his green eyes wide, shock flickering across his face. He had no idea what to do with what I'd just told him. I grinned widely.

"It's true," he confessed slowly. "I do like scarves. Can I see yours?" He scooted even closer and I frowned.

"No."

Ah. The concern is back. "Why not?"

Because Damon snapped my neck a few times and now there's bruises. My lips cracked into a grin. "Because I don't want you to have my scarf."

"I thought you said it was mine?"

"Losers weepers, finders keepers, Steffy." I said in a singsong, squishing his cheeks with my hands.

I had hoped touching him would set off those weird sparks I felt with Damon, but nothing happened. What did that mean? If it wasn't because he was a vampire, then why did it keep happening? I squished and pulled his face around with both hands. I thought it was ridiculous that he was letting me play with his face. Stefan reminded me of one of those old dogs that just laid there and let their owner's child pull on their ears. I really was a dick to him, and he just took it. _Why_?

My grin faded and I looked at him, _really _looked at him. Like he was a real person and not some loser from a shitty show. I dropped my hands. "Why do you let me be so mean to you?" He grinned.

_Grinned_.

That bastard.

"You're not mean. Most of what you say is actually really funny." He said warmly and I scrunched my nose. "I know what I said the other night, I was frustrated and… well, it really wasn't fair and I—" I stuck a finger in his mouth. Stefan gave me a funny look and I leaned all the way into his personal space, lifting up his lip and poking at his teeth.

"What are you doing to my little brother?" Damon drawled, coming into the room.

"Cavity check," I actually wanted to see if there was hidden vampire teeth. Like how does that work? Stefan almost bit my fingers, shaking with laughter.

"Clary, I'm not sure you know what a cavity check is… A cavity check has nothing to do with teeth."

Sparked by a sudden idea, I jerked backwards in the chair, making my eyes go round with pretend terror. I flew a hand to my scarfed up neck.

"Clare?" Stefan asked quietly, alarmed, and I blinked, staring at him as if I hadn't realized he was there, and then flickered my gaze toward Damon who actually looked concerned, his brow furrowed. I dropped my hand.

"I…" Oh god, these guys were such suckers. I thought for sure Damon would know what I was up to. "Sorry. I'm going to see if my sister needs help…" I sat up quickly, Damon's gaze following me. Before I passed him I winked and shot him a grin.

Suck it, Stefan.

Bonnie grabbed my hand and pulled me into the kitchen. I guess we were excited about cleaning? Though all the cleaning was done. Like everything was in the dishwasher. Another reason why they acted like adults. I would've left the plates on the floor.

"Are you two dating?" Bonnie asked, her and Elena cornering me. I snorted.

"No. Far from it."

"I gave him the talk." Elena said seriously. I stared at her. What talk?

"The you better not do anything to hurt my sister talk." Bonnie clarified. Too late, he's killed me twice. I grinned in amusement. "They were both in here discussing you! Elena says—"

"He knows your total indifference to the whole dating scene," Elena was grinning excitedly. How was this exciting? "You told him so _much_! You've never even _looked _at a guy before, and now you're ditching school to talk to one all day?"

"We're friends." I'm the one who hung out with Damon, so why did it feel like I was the only one who was missing something?

"He wants to take it really slow with you," Elena continued with a wide grin. "He says he wants to be whatever you want him to be." Damon what the hell are you doing? My cheeks exploded with heat and they giggled. Nooo! I tried to fan my cheeks to cool them down. This was crazy!

"This is so romantic!" Bonnie gushed. No its vampire dickery and I didn't understand what angle he was coming from! "The one guy you're interested in is so accepting and willing to wait like three months before even holding hands with you! Do you know what this means?"

That he's crazy and wants to kill everyone?

"I totally approve of him." Elena agreed. "You guys have the same humor, it's like you're speaking another language when you're with him!"

"No?" What the hell was she talking about? "This is how friends joke around?"

"Yeah, special friends. It's different. This is different. I could feel the emotions going on, you guys feel something for each other and its strong." Bonnie stated seriously. Yeah, like deep rooted amusement about making Stefan's life hell and the whole inside joke where I know he's a vampire and he knows I'm a body snatcher that can't die! WHAT THE HELL, DAMON?

"I'm getting the pie." I said, wiggling away from them and snatching the pie off the island, pretending to put it on the table so I could turn my head toward Stefan and Damon. Stefan was tense and obviously hissing something, and Damon's gaze flickered to meet mine. _THE FUCK_ I mouthed to him and a wicked grin slid across his face.

That dick.

In the end, Stefan loudly stated that he and Damon needed to leave and Elena told them to go ahead and take the pie home. They wouldn't even eat the pie! They liked blood! How could she do this to me? I was going to eat the entire thing! Damon returned my phone to me and, with everyone watching, gently took my hand, bringing it to his lips.

"Goodnight, Clary." He murmured, his blue eyes dancing with wicked amusement. Elena and Bonnie squealed and my cheeks grew hot. Goddamn it.

"See you, D."

Stefan left giving Elena a kiss and me a worried look. And I got out of Elena cornering me to talk more lies about me and Damon's nonexistent love affair because she had to take Bonnie home. Ugh!

I quickly texted Caroline telling her I'd call her first thing in the morning. I texted _WHY _to Damon. As I was changing into pajamas, my phone went off and I picked it up.

"Damon, what the fuck?" I whined. "Do you know what they did to me?"

"_I heard it. Loved your little show for Stefan, by the way. That was priceless. He's about ready to stake me. I almost burst into laughter when you winked. You are by far my _favorite _human_." Damon said cheerfully from the other end and I huffed, bouncing down on the bed.

"Do you know how human teenage girls get, D? I don't want to pretend to be dating you."

"_Oh shush. You won't have to pretend anything. It'll just be me pretending to court you, woo you, whatever you. It's a cover story and it'll drive Stefan up the wall, as you put it. And Elena already had it set in her mind that's what was going on, I just went with it. Oh, Clare's never even noticed anyone before, you must be so special, you really make her light up, what are your intentions. What should I have said?_"

"That you only wanted to have neck snapping sex." I deadpanned, picking at the blanket as his laughter trickled in. "I'm tired, despite sleeping all day. So…"

"…_Mmm, trying to get rid of me already? Have pleasant dreams, Clary_."

Well that sounded threatening. I snapped my phone shut and plugged it in. I texted Jeremy to let him know of the leftovers and then snuggled up into bed.

* * *

I sat in front of the computer, cross legged, keyboard in lap. It was three AM and I was scrolling through a webpage. My roommate, while she could write amazing papers, couldn't research to save her life. I was a pro, if it existed, I could find it. I rubbed my eyes, feeling unusually tired.

"So that's what you look like."

I jumped, the keyboard tumbling off my lap and falling to the ground with a loud clatter. I turned around, staring wide eyed at Damon. How the hell did he get into my apartment?

And why was he real?

Damon grinned devilishly. "You're so tiny…. Well, _tinier_." I stood up, puffing my cheeks out with an irritated pout as he loomed in front of me. I only came halfway up his chest and he seemed outrageously pleased by that. "You look like you're ten."

"Thanks a whole lot, D, how are you in my apartment?" I demanded, tilting my head to stare up at him. He laughed, ruffling my hair, looking so damn amused.

"Oooh, listen to that New York accent. That's sexy." He grinned, snatching my glasses from my face. Oh. God. Damn. It. "Red glasses, huh? God you are so _cute_. Why are you so cute? I can't even terrorize you now. You must be… 4'10? 4'9? The other Clary is maybe 5'2. You must feel like a giant when you're her."

"I'm dreaming." I realized with a frown. "Why are you in my dreams?"

"Why are you dreaming about college things? I thought we'd be at the beach. That's where you like to go, isn't it?" He tilted his head, looking at me oddly. "Or something involving Batman. The dream is supposed to start off doing something you love doing. And then I was going to turn it into a nightmare."

"Oh." I waved a hand dismissively, unbothered by what he was saying. "I really love to research. And how can it be a nightmare if you're here?"

"Ugh, stop talking like that." He groaned, pushing my face away from him. "I can't decide which Clary I like more. Maybe the other one, since I can want to tap that and not feel like a pedophile."

I laughed, pulling his hand from my face. "You're like over a hundred. You're a creepy old man." I grinned up at him and Damon's blue eyes twinkled with amusement.

"But this… this is just so _you_. You actually look the way you act. Childlike." He rocked on his heels. "Still gonna kill you, though." His face became veiny, red and black mixed in his once super pretty blue eyes and he opened his mouth, fangs out and he lunged down for me, grabbing my shoulders.

I burst out laughing. This was just way overly dramatic and ridiculous.

Damon frowned, straightening, his face going back to normal.

"Clary you're supposed to be afraid." He said, like I had gotten my lines wrong in a play.

"I told you, I don't know why I'm not. It just doesn't work. You can startle me but…" I shrugged. "Plus it's my dream. I can do whatever I want."

"No you can't." He said, now wearing a dress. He looked down at himself and I grinned widely. "Huh, this has never happened to me before. Though, I supposed you can maintain some control… This _is _still your mind. And you're aware that this is a dream…" He whined suddenly. "Why aren't you afraid of me? You know I've killed you before. And I kill people! I'm an evil vampire."

An evil vampire dressed like Santa.

"Clary!"

I laughed. "You're like a sexy Freddy Krueger. Has the remake come out yet? I love that movie, they have the guy who did Rorschach play as him. I went in thinking I'd be terrified but I was rooting for him the entire time. Loudly."

"You are a sick little girl, you know that? Some serious issues." He huffed. "If you're not going to let me scare you, then I'm leaving." Damon said and I sighed, trotting back over to him.

"Okay Mr. Evil and Terrifying." I wrapped my arms around him, snuggling into his chest. "I wish I didn't have to wake up. All these credits, wasted. But at least now you know I'm one hundred percent telling you the truth about Vampire Diaries."

Damon growled at me and disappeared causing me to lose my balance and fall face first into the ground. Surprisingly it didn't hurt. But then, I guess it was because I was dreaming.


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, not even Clarissa.

Wow guys, thank you so much for the encouraging words! Big thank you: DELENAfan97, Moka-girl, MelissaIsLame (thank you for reviewing all the chapters, they really made my day!), nightwatchers2, BeccaSco, Cara, tvdspnislife, Chaos-and-Insanity, Ooo a jellybean (yes, he has, but I kind of see him being overly polite and not entering until invited anyway), Pewdspie, AshlynVarela, janeyjane, penny. bear. 37, DGfleetfox (:D thank you for the input, I made her less overly laugh-y at everything, lemme know if it's better!), Guest, Guest, Guest, CacklingBlasphemy, ty, BrittxAngelusx, Bronzelove, MelissaOnTrack111, iheartanime07, vikki. dillard, Peace and Love831

As requested, I wrote a small thing on Damon's POV at the end. I hope it's okay and as in character as possible. Gah.

* * *

"_Okay, A, what the hell fill me in! B, do you need a ride to the game later?_" Caroline's voice came through my phone which was resting lazily on my shoulder as I shifted through shirts in my closet. I was in a black tank top and sleeping shorts, searching for what to wear today._ "And before you get all ADD on me you already promised you'd come to support me._" Caroline said in a huffy sort of way. I grinned sheepishly, amused.

"Of course I'll be there. And okay, but you absolutely _cannot _tell _anyone _what I'm about to tell you." I said seriously, pulling out a really cute top to examine closer.

"_I keep all your secrets. Never told a soul. Comes with the best friend territory. I mean everyone else, yeah, I can blab their secrets but they're not us._" She said with a scoff._ "Now get on with it! Damon drove you home and you're suddenly gone all Friday? Plus I got a text from Bonnie saying you two are exclusive. Like, as if! Like you'd let _her _know before me, that's just whatever. I know how you work, Clare, you don't _get _into relationships, and while Damon is smoking hot he'd have to show up in a Mickey Mouse costume reciting Disney lines before you even considered the idea_!"

I would probably just have to kill myself if he ever did that, because nothing in life would ever be that funny ever again. I laughed.

"And he'll sweep me off my feet and I'll know he's the one when he makes me laugh!" I quoted Minnie Mouse with a roll of my eyes, grinning. "Jesus. Okay so I'm glad at least you're not hopping on this date train. It's like they don't even know me. Bonnie and Elena decided that we're, like, soulmates, and it isn't like that. You know me." I sighed, tossing a shirt I doubted I'd ever wear or ever wore out of my closet. "But, legit, I find him attractive." I say this knowing that Damon would choose this time to appear. Because it always happens that way.

"_O-M-G_! _Get out_!" Caroline gasped.

"I know! I saw him shirtless the other day, Care, I thought I was going to die. I really did."

"_Did you get pictures_?"

"I bet if I asked him to pose naked for you, he'd just show up in your room, I swear to God. I have never seen a more perfect body in my entire life. And it should be _illegal_, like holy shit. The first time I ever find a guy hot and it has to be a Sex God!"

"_This is a very proud moment for me. You've finally become a woman. What do you say? Kick those Disney shoes off and get plowed by the beast_?"

"And that's just it, Care! Worst temptation of my life! Damon's the type who can have uncomplicated, no strings attached, rock-your-world sex." I wondered why Damon hadn't popped up yet. Oh god, imagine if he wasn't here to hear any of this? That would be kind of disappointing. At least I could finally act like a real girl. "But I can't. Mickey Mouse—"

"_Ugh. I know. To your Minnie Mouse. Such a waste! Send him my way_._ If he wants sex, I'm so open. You let him know. No strings attached_."

I laughed. "I'll let him know. Then you can tell me what an idiot I am and all the great sex I'm missing and probably will never get to have. But. Anyway. Elena and Bonnie are on this crusade, so we're going to just go with it because they won't hear anything else."

"_They're like that. So you're coming? Do you need a ride?_"

I opened my mouth, turning, and frowned at Damon who was standing in front of me all veiny eyed, fangs out, looking like he just popped out of a cheesy horror film. Jeez, what took him so long? I gave him a questioning look and he threw me an annoyed one, rolling his eyes and mouthing _I'll take you_.

"Nope, got it covered. What time?"

"_Five. I've gotta get ready, but you are going to tell me everything that happened on Friday. Everything. Okay? Love you_."

"Love you too, Care." I snapped my phone shut and Damon gave me an offended look, like I deeply wronged him. "What?"

"You could have at least jumped." He said, putting his hands on his hips. Oh god. "I'm a scary vampire, stop making me feel like I need to go on killing sprees—which, by the way, I think would go underappreciated! You don't appreciate me! I just appeared in your room in my bloodlust Sunday's best and nothing! No react—"

I took a deep breath and released a bloodcurdling scream causing him to spring backwards, looking startled, his blue eyes widening, veins suddenly crawling across his skin. He hissed, fangs bared. I was pretty sure I just scared the fangs _out_ of him. Ha!

"What the _hell_—" he began, angrily, and I pressed my palm against his chest, easily shoving him into my closet and closing the white double doors just as the joint bathroom door tore open.

Elena came rushing into my room, soaked, holding a towel to her body, her dark eyes wide as she glanced around the room. "What happened?" She asked quickly, coming to stand by me, her hand on my arm as she looked around. "Are you okay? What happened? Clare? Are you okay?" She asked worriedly just as the bedroom door flew open causing Elena to jump. Jeremy came stumbling in.

"What happened?" He asked, headphones half on his ears. He looked at me and then to Elena. "Oh man, no wonder you screamed. Nobody wants to see you in a towel, Lena. Gross." Jeremy said, pulling his headphones back on and leaving, closing the door just as Damon snorted loudly.

Elena looked at the closet and then to me, her eyebrows raised. "What was that, Clare?" She gave me the _I know _look, but I wasn't hiding anything! "Do you have someone in your closet?" She yanked the doors open and Damon, leaning against my shirts, staggered to stand upright, flashing her a charming grin, wiggling his fingers.

"Hello, Elena. Don't worry, I won't tell Stefan I saw you…" he grimaced. "Indecently."

Elena tilted her head, puffing her lips out in an annoyed frown, hands on her hips. "Okay, what are you doing sneaking into my sister's room?" She asked, giving him her _explain yourself _sassy look. "It's eleven o'clock in the morning."

"Is it?" Damon asked furrowing his brow as if confused. "I've just come from Narnia… it was terrible. So much blood."

I nodded solemnly. "Bad time to go vacationing there," I agreed, highly amused. "Aslan has rabies."

"Out." Elena interrupted as Damon opened his mouth, sounding all grown up and strict. She pointed toward the bedroom door. "You and Clare can talk about _Narnia _later."

"Ooh, bossy. I know who wears the pants in _your _relationship..." Damon slinked past her, grinning, his blue eyes sliding to meet mine. "Tragically separated yet again, my dearest Clarissa," he cooed as Elena sighed and began pushing him from the room. I watched on with amusement. "Why must your sister torment us like—"

"_Good_bye, Damon," Elena said loudly, closing my bedroom door in his face. My phone immediately began to ring and, grinning, I flipped it open, bringing it to my ear. Elena turned around and gave me an _are you serious _expression. Looks like she was totally over mine and Damon's soulmate love!

"Damon, it's been _years_!" I cried into the phone. "_Years_!"

"_Decades_!" Damon agreed, sounding just as dramatic. "_I've been in a state of suspended agony, I long to see you, my Clarissa. Is that wicked sister of yours gone yet?_"

"No, she holds me prisoner still." I said with mock sadness, Elena swiping the phone from me. I grinned at her widely.

"Call back later, I have to talk to my sister now." She said, snapping the phone shut and tossing it onto my bed. Elena's expression tilted toward nervous and I lifted my eyebrows. "So I was thinking about what you and Damon were saying yesterday…"

We said a lot of things yesterday. A lot of terrible, horrible, things.

"I just don't_ want_ to put the uniform on," she continued, pacing back and forth, getting water all over the floor. Thanks. "Like it's just laid out on my bed and I… I know how have responsibilities and I can't just—"

"Lena," I cut in with a laugh, gently grasping her shoulders, stilling her. "It's _fine_. It's cheerleading, you weren't _married _to it, and if you don't stay true to who you are right now, you'll end up resenting it anyway. Cherish the memories and move on. It's all you can do."

Elena's unease shifted into a thoughtful expression and a smile slid across her face. "So, Damon sneaking into your room…"

I thought we were talking about cheerleading! I puffed my now warm cheeks out. "You can stand here and continue to get water all over my floor, but I'm leaving!"

Elena only laughed after me as I stalked out of the room. It was time to bother Jeremy. I hoped he wasn't doing any gross fifteen year old teenage boy stuff and burst into his room. He was at his computer, headphones on, messaging someone and I crept closer, completely unnoticed. I went in for the pounce and he swirled in his chair, easily shoving me to the side. I hit the ground with a painful wail.

"Predictable," he laughed, pulling down his headphones as he grinned at me. I glowered up at him. "So, you skipped school yesterday to do Elena-unapproved things, huh?"

I rolled onto my back, staring up at him. "Yup. Didn't get in trouble for it, though, since I was hanging out with my serial killer BFF. You know the double standers, you skip school to grieve and that's not okay. I skip school to hang out with a deranged psychopath of the opposite gender and that's totally acceptable." I sat up, looking at him with sudden curiosity. "But dude, what are _you _doing? Spending your Friday nights playing pool?"

Jeremy made a face, pulling his headphones completely off. "Vicki was working…" he muttered, looking strained and less cheerful suddenly. "She and _Tyler _are back together, apparently…"

Ouch. I patted the floor next to me.

"Wanna bitch about Tyler over some video games?"

That's how Damon found us some hours later, sitting in our pajamas on the floor, swearing at each other and playing Mario Kart for the Wii. Damon had burst into the room wearing a black Minnie Mouse fur hat with a giant red white polka dolled bow in the center and long paws attached which looked like Mickey Mouse gloves.

He stared down at us.

I stared back up at him a new sense of awe, the Minnie Mouse fur hat with paws something I never knew I desperately needed. It was love at first sight. Where Damon got it, I had no idea. I just knew it was going to be mine. I would die for that hat.

"Minnie Mouse is robbing us." Jeremy said after a moment, turning his attention back to the TV, completely accepting of this situation. "Take my sister, she's a valuable virgin."

I whipped my head around to give him a look. "Hey!"

"Perfect, I was short one of those for the demonic ritual I do in Mickey Mouse's name every Saturday." Damon said, as though extremely relieved. Ha-ha, really hilarious. Jeremy snorted.

"Your witty reply leads me to believe you are a decent individual that I would like to associate myself with." Jeremy said with a grin. Oh, yeah, sure. Damon's a _total_ decent individual. "Please, have a seat, despite breaking into my room."

"Scoot over, Clary." Damon demanded as he plopped down on the other side of me, snatching the Wii controller from my hands. Have fun being Princess Peach, jerk. "Prepare to be slaughtered."

I stared lovingly at the Minnie Mouse hat. "Can I touch—" I began, raising my hand. Damon slapped it down.

"Could've had the hat but you decided to ignore my calls, now it's mine." He said and I jutted my lower lip out into a pout. How could he deny me? This was beyond cruel! Damon's dickery knows no bounds! I didn't even have my phone _on _me!

"You must be C's serial killer best friend." Jeremy acknowledge, amused, as I pouted. Damon's blue eyes flickered in my direction, amusement breaking across his face.

"Why do you keep _telling_ people that?"

"Because it brings me deep, unimaginable, amusement." I said honestly. Sitting between my new brother and a vampire, both who shouldn't be real or playing Mario Kart together, I was struck with such a feeling of happiness that I blurted: "Can we tell Jeremy?"

"The you not being able to die part," Damon didn't even glance at me and I was stunned with how upfront he was being. "Or the I'm a murdering vampire part?"

I turned to look at him, but he was suddenly no longer sitting next to me. I stiffened, my eyes widening. OH GOD WHAT IF HE WAS PLANNING TO—

Awareness crushed into me as pain exploded, the back of my neck screaming. I hissed, tears forming as I found myself staring up at a very calm Jeremy. Dimly, I realized my head was in his lap. Goddamn it, Damon.

"Welcome back to the living, Clary." Damon greeted, grinning down at me pleasantly. He turned to Jeremy. "Okay, you can act however you normally would've. I compelled your brother. If he freaks, I'm erasing the bonding experience we all just shared." Damon needed a dictionary because I'm not sure he knew what bonding experiences entailed. It wasn't breaking necks.

"Clarissa, oh my _god_!" Jeremy choked out, tears suddenly pouring down his face as he held me protectively to him, cradling my head. Guilt swarmed, I hadn't wanted to freak him out! "Oh my God. Oh my God. You're okay," he sobbed as I bit down on my lower lip, the pain shattering across me.

"Jeremy—" I hissed, my fingers curling in his shirt as the hot pain flared. I didn't want to move! "Less movement!"

"Yeah, you'll want to keep her still." Damon advised happily. "Her neck is still half broken. I imagine it's horribly painful." Bitch.

"You killed my sister!" Jeremy cried, looking half hysterical. "How—I don't understand? You're _alive_, C, but I saw him—he broke your neck—how are you _alive_?"

"We just don't know." Damon said in a singsong.

"It's kind of cool, J." I grinned at him weakly, feeling suddenly tired. "I kind of wish Damon didn't have to show you like this, but I want you in on what's going on in my life. I'm kind of freaked out." More like a lot freaked out.

"I won't tell anyone." Jeremy promised quietly, calming himself down and soothingly brushing the hair from my face. "Jesus, Clare. How did you discover…?"

"Damon snapped my neck." I told him sleepily and Jeremy turned, looking at Damon with an unreadable expression.

"That's how we discovered each other. Me being a vampire," Damon lied brightly, pretending to remember fond memories. "And her being some kind of subhuman freak. Now I'm stuck with her." Like a real marriage.

Silence filled the space between us and my eyelids were growing heavy.

"So when you kept telling us he was a serial killer…" Jeremy trailed off, his voice quite. "You weren't kidding. And he's really a vampire?" He twitched. "Those animal attacks… You _attacked_ Vicki!" Jeremy suddenly exploded. Oh man, drama. "You could have killed her!"

"Mmhm. Not really sure which one _Vicki _is, there's been so many…" Damon's friendly tone had become a lot more dark, threatening. "I might not able to kill Clary, but if you tell anyone about me, or piss me off, I'll make you watch me torture her and we'll see what she can bounce back from and what she can't. And then I'll kill _you_."

"Blue canary." I assured Jeremy sleepily, hoping he knew that code. The only indication that Jeremy understood was the fact that he was starting to relax. Damon was a murdering little psycho, but that still didn't take away the trust I felt for him, and I wanted Jeremy to be aware.

"Elena doesn't know?" Jeremy asked after a moment, his voice level.

"Nope," Damon turned so he was facing us. "Stefan doesn't want her to _know_ about him."

"Stefan's a vampire too?" Jeremy sounded like he wasn't sure if he was okay with that and I smiled at him, lifting my hand to pat him on the cheek.

"Damon's Lestat and Stefan is Edward Cullen."

"Edward Cullen?" Damon asked causing Jeremy to snort, the tension inching away from him.

"Don't ever read Twilight. Sparkling vampires, it's horrifying."

"_Sparkling_?"

"You're taking this really well J."

"You just died but you're here, and I think I'm in shock. Why did you tell me? I feel like that's something you'd want to keep… Secret."

"Well," Damon sighed dramatically. "She needs you. And in order for you to be there for her, you have to know things, and I'm a dick, so I can't possibly be the one to hold her when she cries about being a freak of nature. Hey, the worst that happens is I either erase your memory or kill you. So it's not like I'm going out on a limb."

Beautifully said, Damon. Seriously.

"Can I see your fangs?" Jeremy said after a few seconds and I grinned. I said asked the same thing! We had so much in common!

"You Gilberts and your shit attention spans." Damon scoffed. "What part of mass murdering vampire aren't you getting? You should be dragging Clary out of here to get away from me."

"Hey, I get it. You're a vampire, that's your thing. I might not agree with what you do, and I don't like that you've been killing my sister and almost killed Vicki…"

"Vicki is his birdhouse." I let Damon know sleepily, closing my eyes. God, I was just so _tired_.

"But I need to be here for my sister, so I guess I'm just going to have to deal with it. I'm not going to tell anyone."

"He gets all veiny eyed and everything. It's pretty cool."

"She's going to pass out soon and heal herself." Damon explained lightly.

"Still wanna play Mario Kart?" I vaguely heard Jeremy ask.

I woke feeling groggy, slumped against… leather? Confusion spun as I became more and more aware of everything around me. I was in a car, outside, a soft breeze sliding across my warm skin, the sounds of talking humming in the distance. I blinked hazily, feeling kind of out of it, as I pushed myself upward into a sitting position, a leather jacket sliding down my body. I was in the back of Damon's car which had the top down.

"You are one scary dude," Jeremy, wearing a Minnie Mouse furry hat with the long paws attached, was saying with a laugh. Where'd he get the hat? I wanted it… He was leaning against the car, Damon was pumping gas. We were at a gas station. What the hell? Jeremy turned his head to grin at me, like nothing strange at all was going on. "Hey, C."

"Two hours, a new record." Damon said cheerfully and I stared at him, trying to remember how I got here. "Usually she's out for three to four."

"What happened?" I felt very lost and Damon nodded his head. Jeremy took the nozzle as Damon leaned forward, pulling a scarf from my neck. I stared at him, groggily confused.

"Well, you're still bruised up. How does your neck feel?" He tilted my head up and down, side to side. I sleepily swatted his hand away, feeling awkward. Like I totally didn't want those sparks to go off inside me with Jeremy standing right there.

"S'fine, D. What happened? I remember you came into J's room and…" my mouth twitched. Okay, that's right. He killed me. Again. "_Oh._ Right. I remember now..." Dick. I couldn't believe he was just totally fine with letting Jeremy in on this. Though I guess he would. The shock value of snapping my neck in front of him would've been too much fun to pass up. "Where are we?"

"7-11 gas station," Jeremy grinned. "I packed you clothes to change into, they're in your messenger bag. Caroline said for us to meet her in the parking lot at the school in fifteen minutes."

I nodded, feeling woozy. That's right, I was going to meet her at five. I glanced down at myself, my cheeks flushing with heat when I realized I was still in my pajamas. "Okay," I mumbled, snatching my bag's strap and attempting to stand up, swaying a little. "Ugh, can someone—" I cut myself off as Damon offered a hand.

I slid my hand into his, a part of me expected him to pull a dick move that ended in me somehow getting hurt. My heart bounced a little as he merely stood there, helping me out of the car. I realized, as my feet touched the warm blacktop, that I wasn't wearing any shoes. Oh goddamn it.

"Dude, I'm not wearing shoes! I'm not walking into a gross gas station bathroom like this! How the hell am I supposed to get changed without shoes?"

"Oh shit," Jeremy's expression suddenly became apologetic. "I think we forgot to pack them!" Oh my God, he was _kidding_, right?

"You are the biggest pain in the ass," Damon sighed theatrically, swinging my legs under his arm as he lifted me, carrying me _yet again_. This was a habit, him snapping me neck and carrying me everywhere. My heart jerked, bringing warmth to my cheeks. His hands against my skin were hot and I was feeling dizzy.

"I'm not a pain in the ass," I scoffed, hugging the bag to my chest, trying to focus on the way the bag felt against my fingers rather than the way Damon's fingers felt against my skin. "I'm the greatest thing that's ever happened to you."

"Mm," Damon rolled his eyes, pushing the door open to the 7-11 with his shoulder. "Now don't throw a hissy fit… I told Jeremy that I compelled you to be happy."

"What?"

"Well, he said it was strange, one day you went from being mentally gone, and the next you were suddenly yourself again, like nothing had ever happened. So I told him that I compelled your pain away." He shifted his shoulder upward and I gaped at him.

"Oh." That was actually… really nice for Damon to cover for me. My stare turned thoughtful. "_Why _are you the villain, again?"

He shot me an annoyed look. "I've snapped your neck _three_ times now, Clary." One time because I _asked _him to, and another time because I wanted Jeremy to know. Damon was just a big, murdering, softie.

"Does it bring you great joy to kill me?" I asked quietly, already knowing what he was going to say. He was going to walk right into my clever trap.

"Yes."

"That was a pop quiz, and you just failed." I told him, grinning widely. "If you can feel great joy, you're not a villain." Ha, sucker.

"Damn it, I wasn't prepared!" He growled playfully, a grin flickering across his face as he pushed the men's restroom door open. Huh.

"That's why it's a pop quiz, you should have been studying…" I trailed off, my nerves flaring to life as I realized he was taking me inside a stall. My gaze shifted upward. "…D?"

I mean, why were we even in the men's bathroom anyway…? My heart jumped as he closed the door to the stall. Um?

"Relax," he murmured rolling his eyes at me like I was getting dramatic. I eyed him, a sense of calm sweeping through me. Bastard was probably compelling me. "And don't _freak _out, this is completely and totally platonic."

Completely and totally—? I stiffened as I realized my back was now pressed against the side of the stall, my legs on either side of his hips. _Oh my God_. Immediately a strange heat flooded through me, my heart staggering and dropping into my stomach. Damon's hand was grasping my thigh gently, his skin hot against mine and I was finding it was becoming more and more difficult to _think_. He was just so _attractive_, I wanted to scream. He seemed to be completely oblivious to the horror he was inflicting on my _body_, my messenger bag set between us. He was going through it with the other hand, but all I seemed to be able to focus on was how his fingers felt. Why was this _happening _to me?

"Calm down," he shushed, pulling out a baggy black shirt with a sunglasses wearing cheetah on it. "I'm not going to do anything to you." His blue eyes met mine, trapping me, and swallowing me whole.

"I… I can totally deal with standing on the floor," I managed to say, unable to look at him anymore, my face on fire. I could _feel _his eyes on me.

"You'll probably be standing in pee." Damon said casually and I cringed, wilting, letting my face fall against his chest. I wailed.

"How do normal people stand this? This isn't fair!" I whined, miserably. "This is literally the worst, why are you so hot?"

"I ask myself the same question every morning when I look at myself in the mirror and realize, sadly, that I'm unable to tap my fine _Sex God _self." Damon purred, laughter rumbling in his chest and I tilted my head upward, a grin forming. I knew it. I knew he was around to hear my phone call to Caroline this morning.

"You're not killing my sister are you?" Jeremy's voice came in and I squeaked, pulling back, sitting up straight, my face in flames again. Oh god, Jeremy!

"_Maybe_." Damon's grin was wicked and I puffed my cheeks out.

"Help me, J." I deadpanned.

"Okay C, there's nothing I can do about it. I mean, wait, I think I have a pencil in my pocket—no, just a pen. Okay. Yeah. You're screwed." Jeremy's voice was casual, but I had a feeling he was uncomfortable. Welcome to the uncomfortable boat, Damon's not invited. "I'm gonna get snacks for the game, you want anything?"

"Pepsi. Sugar. Lots of sugar." I demanded immediately, god knows I'd need a drink to survive the rest of this day.

"Only because you died," Jeremy sighed and I suddenly wondered if I could use that to my advantage. Do this for me, I just had my neck snapped! "Should I get a straw for you, vampy, to stick in one of us? Or just knock someone out and drag them back to your car?"

Oh my _God_, Jeremy. I bit on my lower lip, highly amused. "Actually, I'm fine with redbull. And those sour gummy worms." Damon said pleasantly.

"I shouldn't be so surprised that you can eat non-blood things…" Jeremy murmured. "Pretend I'm doing a decent job at threatening you about doing anything with my sister."

I heard the restroom door _whoosh_ open and close.

"He doesn't trust me alone with you," Damon announced, amused. Well given the fact that I've been killed a few times… "Now lift your arms so I get this shirt on you."

"Damon…" I began, awkwardly lifting my arms. He slammed the shirt over my head and I huffed, slapping his hands away to pull it down properly. I gazed at him, seriously. "While I really, _really_, beyond anything I could ever expression, appreciate everything you've done—"

"—like kill you a few times?"

"You didn't have to tell Jeremy about yourself." I finished softly.

"But it's so much fun snapping your neck, I just couldn't resist," he grinned impishly, blue eyes glowing. "I _know_, completely impulsive, but it's all worked out in the end. You wanted him to know about you, now he knows about both of us. It'll be _fun_, and you and your fake brother can bond over it so you can… I don't know, feel more at home here or something." Ugh, Damon. Despite the fact that he only did it for the shock value, it was still really sweet of him anyway. And how messed up is my thinking? Damon's so sweet for killing me!

"It's not my secret for him and I to bond over." I pointed out. "I don't know much about him, not really, what if he… You know, tells someone?"

"He won't." Damon looked unconcerned. "Stop worrying about it. Now," he shifted. "Stand on my shoes so you don't have to touch the floor."

Clutching his shirt, I slowly shimmied down, my tiptoes touching the tops of his shoes. Damon had me gently pressed against the stall so I wouldn't fall and my body was hypersensitive to every inch of me that was against him, my fingers tight on arms in fear of falling over.

"You know," I realized suddenly, feeling like we were playing a ridiculous game of _the floor is lava_. "I could've changed into the clothes out in the car." Since I was just putting the new ones over my pajamas. I could have saved myself a lot of—whatever this was.

Damon stared down at me oddly, like I just said something crazy. "Mm, right, because little Miss Prude Disney who believes in true love is going to be alright with a bunch of strangers ogling you in your skimpy pajamas while you hop around trying to put clothes on." Damon scoffed, pulling the pants out of the messenger bag. "Now shut up and stick out your leg."

My heart jolted and I stared up at him, stunned for a moment. It's strange, he has no qualms about snapping my neck and killing me, but then acts like a total gentleman who cares about my way of life within hours of each other. It was like I knew two totally different Damon's.

Having Damon help dress me like I was a child was something I had no idea how I even let myself get into and hoped I'd never repeat the process. If I dwelled on why Damon did the things he did (jumping from maybe giving a tiny fuck to giving none of the fucks) I would give myself a migraine and so I decided to just continue on. He was a murderous vampire, so he could do whatever he wanted, I guess. No point in trying to figure it out. In the end, I lost my balance as I wiggled into my pants and flailed, clinging onto the now open stall door in hopes that my feet wouldn't touch the ground.

"Damon," I hissed, sliding. "Help me!"

"Long live Mufasa!" He merely said pleasantly, slowly prying my fingers from the top of the stall door. I gaped at him, wide eyed.

"You said—"

"I'm bored of playing nice," he grinned wickedly. "And I lie!"

My butt hit the gross bathroom floor and I made a noise of horror. "Oh God, I can feel the pee germs invading my soul!"

"Yup. You're damaged goods." Damon agreed, easily stepping over me. "Now you can never find true love." Despite what he was saying, he still offered his hands to help me up.

We found Jeremy in the candy section and Damon greeted him by popping in front of him with his fangs out causing Jeremy to drop everything he was holding, swearing loudly.

"See, Clary, that's how you're_ supposed _to react." Damon lectured, turning to give Jeremy a look, like I wasn't here. "Your sister is a freak of nature."

"Seriously, C. You've got a real life vamp in front of you being scary as hell." Jeremy said in a disapproving tone, lightly kicking the soda bottle that he'd dropped down the aisle. "It's probably all the Twilight crap that's jaded her. Can't appreciate the awesome vampire that is you."

"Whaaa? I don't like Twilight!" I hissed, offended, and Jeremy looked at me strangely. I blanched. Oh. My. God. _No_. "I don't like Twilight! Don't slander my character with lies, J!" I threw a box of jellybeans at him.

"Yeaaaaah, so, speaking of Twilight," Jeremy turned to Damon, totally ignoring me. Rude! "I noticed you neither burst into flames or sparkle in the sunlight."

Damon squinted his eyes at us, raising his left hand to show off his ring. "Magic ring and all that. Pretty useful." His lips curved into a smirk. "Otherwise _poof_, I'd be a pile of ash right now. But it's looking like I'm going to have to read this Twilight book to keep up with the _times_."

"Get really high and watch the movies instead." I suggested, grabbing a bag of Reese's cups. "You can pretend it's Stefan. Legit, no joke, best moment in film history, of all time, is when Edward eats the baby out of Bella's uterus and then the werewolf falls in love with it."

Jeremy and Damon stared at me as if I'd lost my freakin' mind.

"Clare…" Jeremy said slowly, furrowing his brow. "There's only been one movie so far… and that didn't happen? Are you… okay?" He was looking more and more concerned and I froze, staring at him with a startled look. Oh my God, I forgot it was 2009! He'll totally guess my secret now!

"She gets a little—uh, _strange_," Damon dismissed, looking way too amused at my horrified discomfort. Jeremy looked between us, obviously knowing Damon was totally covering for me! "After she woke up the first time—or was it the second time…?" He trailed off, as though couldn't remember and Jeremy stiffened, his hand on my arm, drawing me closer to him. Good, distract him from my screw up by talking about my deaths!

"How many times have you _killed _her?"

Damon acted like he didn't hear him. "She went on this whole rant about true love and sang me Disney songs."

"And suddenly I realize why you've killed her more than once." Jeremy deadpanned and I smacked his arm as Damon smiled darkly. "Also, um… I've got no money on me, so…"

I frowned at him, hugging the Pepsi bottle to my chest. "No it's been promised to me! Quick, Damon, kill all the witnesses, I'm gonna steal this! And then we'll burn down the gas station!"

"I'm not your pet." Damon smacked me on the head with his packet of sour gummy worms. Rude!

"If you do me a solid, I can pay you back later." Jeremy said and Damon rolled his eyes, snatching the Pepsi from me and turning on his heels. I puffed my cheeks out, offended, and followed after him.

He threw all our goodies onto the counter and flashed the girl cashier a charming smile, leaning against the counter in a flirty manner. "You're going to pay for me, okay, sweetie?"

The girl immediately smiled widely. "Hey, these are on me, okay?" She said happily and I made a face. God, I _hated _the compulsion thing. Damon's smile became more flirty.

"Thank you."

"So you just compelled her?" Jeremy asked as the cashier bagged our items. Yeah let's talk about this loudly! Damon's gaze lazily slid to him and then to me, his dark smirk stretching across his face.

"Mmhm, but Clary hates it."

"Hey, it's creepy as hell, I don't like the whole mind control thing." I defended myself with a huff, pulling my soda out of the bag as we existed the 7-11. "It's freaky."

"Am I going to have to pinky promise not to compel people around you?" Damon whined, pretending to look pouty.

"It's okay D, I accept your creepy weird ass qualities." I patted his arm. "We both know you'd be lying to me anyway, and nobody here digs the whole _change for me _thing. That's lame." Damon stared at me, furrowing his brow.

"There you go again, C, _enabling_." Jeremy teased and I smacked his arm with my soda.

"Shut up, Elena!" I hissed and Jeremy grinned widely at me. Like hell I was an enabler! I was far from it! Huffing, I turned to Damon and smiled brightly. "…But thank you for the Pepsi, I really appreciate it." Damon merely gave me that look again, like I said something really freakin' weird.

"Yes, thanks for adding to C's caffeine addiction," Jeremy agreed sarcastically. "Please try to resist snapping her neck once all the sugar hits her system and we can't keep her still."

"I could compel her to sit still…" Damon said in a threatening singsong as he helped me into the back of his car and I nearly fell on my face as I jerked around, gawking at him in horror. Damon's smile was wicked.

"I would _die_." I hissed. "You would be killing me, mentally!"

"Wow it's so good I'm not a vampire," Jeremy said, getting into the passenger seat. "I would be compelling everyone I met."

"Yeah me too…" I admitted. "…I would so be a total tool if I was a vampire. I would have a mountain of sugar and human slaves. Like it'd just be massive killing sprees and zero humanity. I'd walk into an orphanage and it'd be a buffet."

"Clare, Jesus Christ."

"See, Clary, you'd still be a sweetheart even as a vampire. The key is to go to a school. Those orphans won't have anyone who will miss them. Points off."

* * *

"You two," Caroline sounded pissed. She was staring at me and Damon, her hands on her hips, all sassed up in her cheerleading uniform. "What the _hell_? You talked Elena into _quitting_?"

"That's my cue to go," Jeremy said pleasantly, ruffling my hair. No, you traitorous bastard! You can't leave me here with an angry Caroline! "Catch up with you in a bit, C. Later, Damon."

There he goes, with that Minnie Mouse hat that should've been mine.

"Clare!" Caroline snapped my attention back to her and I smiled, guiltily. "Don't give me that look! I can't believe you! And you didn't even call to give me a heads up? I have to rearrange everyone's positions now! You know I had everything planned out precisely!"

"This is actually all _my _fault," Damon said with a purr. "Clary would've called if I hadn't been… occupying her time." I didn't realize I had to call her about this, though—wait, _what_? Damon slid closer to me, his tone suggestive and Caroline scoffed, looking him up and down.

"Don't flatter yourself, Salvatore, I know my best friend." Caroline said with a tilt of her head, her eyebrows raised. "The only thing you've got going is your sex appeal and that doesn't fly with her, so don't _even_. Now excuse me while I frantically rearrange the entire squad around. _Thanks_." She flipped her hair over her shoulder and marched away.

"Ouch." Damon frowned, turning to look down at me. "Is it true, Claryberry? Do you only like me for my personality?" I gently took his hands in mine.

"I'm sorry you had to find out this way, Damon." I told him sympathetically, giving his hands a reassuring squeeze. "One day you'll find the right woman who'll only want you for—"

"Clare!" Elena cut in with a happy laugh, coming over to us. I dropped Damon's hands. She smiled brightly at Damon, seeming to be in a really good mood. "Hello, again, Damon! I'm unsurprised to see you with my lovely twin."

Damon gave a tiny sarcastic smirk. "I can't seem to _stay away_." He slung an arm over my shoulders, tugging me against him. I pointedly ignored the flutter in my chest. "I see you're not in a little rah-rah outfit. Good for you!"

"D's actually thinking about trying out."

"I'd make a fantastic cheerleader." Damon agreed cheerfully, swaying his hips against mine. "Woo, go team, yeaaah!"

Elena burst out laughing. "_Wow_." She shook her head, grinning widely. "Can I borrow Clare for a second?"

"Aw, I can't be a part of the girl gossip?" Damon whined, his fingertips drumming against my shoulder. "It's about Stefan, isn't it? Go on, I won't tell him I was listening. I want to hear about my _charming_ little brother."

Elena took my hand. "Sorry, Damon. It'll only be a moment." She pulled me away from him and I found it annoying that I actually felt _chillier _again now that he wasn't next to me. She led me a few feet away, her smile widening and I was pretty sure Damon could still hear us. "Look!" She gushed, holding up her necklace. "Stefan just _gave _this to me! He said he had it for a while, and he's never wanted to give it to anyone before!"

Weird. "Lena, I'm totally the wrong person to talk to about this…" I began, uneasily, causing her smile to falter. "I mean that's kind of… _Intense_." Like I get it, Stefan, Elena's your true love, but Jesus Christ. "You haven't even known him for a week and he's giving you precious jewelry? And how do you know he's had it for a long time, he could've bought it from the dollar store and has like fifty of them and that's his _line _he gives new girlfriends. Maybe he just wants to get into your pants." Or maybe he was stuck on the whole _be together forever _intense track. Vampires, man.

Elena was frowning at me now, her hand on the necklace, twirling it in her fingers. "Can't you at least pretend to be happy for me?"

"I'm super excited a guy you met six days ago and only kind of started dating a few days ago gave you jewelry and it's totally not a super intense, creepy, possessive thing with ulterior motives attached." I faked smiled and she pursed her lips. "Oh come on, how am I supposed to react? It's intense! I'm just telling you how I feel about it honestly, if you want mindless support and gushing giggles, go find someone else, Lena!"

"For someone so _obsessed _with true love," she began irritated, slapping her hands against her thighs. "You sure have a super negative attitude about it." I scoffed. Yeah, okay.

"If you feel like it's true love than why does what I have to say have any impact? If you're happy, great, I'm happy for you. I'm just saying be careful. You don't even know him yet." Like he's a vampire and you look like the dead love of his life.

She narrowed her dark eyes and sighed. "Okay, well, I'm gonna go tell Bonnie." Elena turned and marched away. I wasn't sorry at all for telling her how I saw it.

"Acting like the concerned twin, I like it." Damon's voice in my ear made me jump and he chuckled. I turned to look at him. "It's so much easier to sabotage Stefan's happiness when I have _inside help_."

"Actually… I was speaking honestly," I admitted, shifting my shoulders upward into a tiny shrug. "That comes off as really weird and possessive. Like if I was her, I'd run. And while I'm totally up for making Stefan's life hell, I'm not gonna intentionally hurt Elena. I would've said the same thing if I didn't know anything about Vampire Diaries."

"Aw, you're not going to ruin my _fun_, are you?" Damon whined, offering his arm and shooting me a dark, taunting, smirk. "I planned on spreading doubt and lies." I slid my arm through his, smiling at him faintly.

"Don't worry, D, friends support each other even if there's vampire dickery involved, and I'm pro-Stefan-misery, so. If you told her Stefan was a crack snorting player, I'll have your back without being a backstabber to her, you know? If Stefan was a good boyfriend who was open with her like he should be, then what you say would have no impact. In the end, any damage to their relationship is Stefan's fault and I'm being a good pretend sister by showing her that."

Damon tilted his head, staring down at me. "I don't _do _the whole friendship thing," he said slowly, blue eyes gleaming darkly. "Don't confuse this little _alliance _for anything more than temporary amusement for me."

I snorted. Oh _please_. "We're friends, you dick. You might not see _me _as yours, which is okay, 'cause you're a vampire and shit, but there is literally nothing you can do to get out of this. You're my friend whether you want to be or not, so suck it." Seriously.

Damon's expression flittered briefly into surprise before his taunting grin flew across his lips and he dipped his head lower. "Are you _offering_?" He growled lowly in my ear, sending a shiver down my spine. "I'd be delighted to _suck it_."

"My dick is soft for you," I murmured back, well aware he was talking about sucking my blood. Damon pulled his head back, his light blue eyes dancing with amusement, his shoulders shaking with repressed laughter.

"Come to cheer me on, Clare?"

Surprised, I turned to find Tyler in a football jersey. His dark eyes slid in Damon's direction and he did that horribly annoying guy-greeting-nod thing.

"Of course, Tyler, you know my life revolves around only you." I deadpanned causing him to roll his eyes, a grin tugging on his face.

"Obviously." Tyler tilted his dark eyes back to Damon. "What's up, man? Got nothing better to do than to hang out at a high school football game, huh?" I couldn't tell if Tyler was just being a dick, or if he normally talked that way.

"Mm," Damon made a noncommittal noise. "Clary wanted me to come, it's impossible to deny her anything." My cheeks warmed and I puffed out a breath. Damon seriously knew how to sound so convincing and _charming_, holy crap. "Annnd, I've got to support my little bro, he just joined your team."

Irritation flashed across Tyler's face and he clenched his jaw. "You're Stefan's brother?"

"I am. Damon Salvatore," he slunk forward lazily, offering a hand, and I wondered what he was up to. Tyler looked like he didn't want anything to do with Damon and flashed him a condescending smirk.

"Tyler Lockwood."

"Oh? The same Tyler who threw a football at Stefan's face?" Damon asked, cheerfully, head tilted to the side and Tyler stared back at him, flatly. "Clary told me. You had her in hysterics. She's not very fond of Stefan…" What the _hell _was Damon up to? A pleased look shifted across Tyler's face.

"Hey, babe!" Vicki greeted, bouncing to his side. He blinked, surprised, as she pecked him on the cheek. "Hi Clare."

"Hey Vicki." I greeted politely, miffed on Jeremy's behalf. "This is Damon."

"Sup?" Vickie didn't even really seem to notice us anymore, her arms around Tyler's neck. I totally had a feeling they were going to get their freak on. Gross. I grabbed Damon's arm, pulling him away.

"Vicki?" Damon murmured curiously. "From the way your fake brother talked about her, I was under the assumption _they _were a thing."

"She's kind of bouncing back and forth between them." I shrugged. "In the show you turn her into a vampire and I think she dies."

"Consider it not happening, then." Damon scoffed. "Whatever fake me did, _I'm _not doing."

I wondered if that would be okay. I mean, that couldn't possibly have a giant negative impact on the entire plot right? I was fairly sure Vicki wasn't that important in the show. And could there even be a plot if this was real life now? I mean, there was no _Clarissa _in Vampire Diaries, so why was there one here? Remember when all I was worried about was bills and college? Now I was questioning my existence, my reality and what sort of negative impacts whatever I say and do could affect everything around me. Totally lame.

"Why do you refer to Vicki as Jeremy's birdhouse?"

I blinked, focusing my attention back to Damon. "It's code. If I tell you, you can't tell anyone else."

Damon rolled his eyes at me. "I'm the vault of all your dark secrets, Clary. And who would I tell? Stefan?"

"I can picture you waking him up with a cup of bunny blood and saying, brother listen, I got Clarissa to tell us what her codes mean! I finally done it! And then you two high fiving and leaving forever."

"You've found me out!" Damon gasped. "That's my true diabolical plan! The only reason I returned to Mystic Falls!"

A large grin spread across my face. "You win me over with humor every time. Okay, I'll tell you. It's what we refer to people who are very special, doesn't even have to be romantic. They build a little birdhouse in our soul."

"They Might be Giants," Damon squinted his blue eyes at me. "Clever." I grinned widely. He _knew _the reference. "And so when you said _blue canary_ after I broke your neck, your fake brother was less wary of me. Is that how you see me? The blue canary in the outlet who watches over you?" His voice fell into a growl, his fingers winding around my arm, pulling me closer. Suddenly Damon was in a bad mood. Okaaay.

"You're the only one who can ever know the real me, and that means something to me." I said quietly, seriously. "I only _see _you as you are, Damon. But I trust you. And that's what I was conveying to Jeremy."

"You shouldn't trust me." Damon snapped, his voice a hiss. "I don't _care _about you, don't mistake any of this for _humanity_, Clarissa." Oh jeez.

"I don't mistake this for anything but what it is." I said softly, very aware that I was suddenly treading on thin ice. Damon was obviously offended and I had a feeling his mood could turn very dangerous very fast if I wasn't careful with how I worded everything. Goddamn. He was about to throw a giant vampire tantrum.

"And what _is _this? _Enlighten_ me." He growled darkly, his blue eyes slits.

"It's vampire dickery." What else could it possibly be? I was careful to make him feel that I wasn't trying to humanize him, as that seemed to be a trigger. His fingers loosened on my now throbbing arm, and he blinked, clearly not expecting that.

Annoyance quickly followed the initial surprise. "Clary, go find Jeremy and don't leave his side for the rest of the game. Know that I'm compelling you and I hope it pisses you off."

I was suddenly standing alone and feeling an urgency to find Jeremy. My feet seemed to move all on their own and I scoffed. Stupid vampire dickery. Damon is such a freakin' baby. It didn't take long to find Jeremy, he was hanging around a few other guys who looked like the type to hang around outside of buildings and do drugs. Jeremy tilted his head in greeting.

"I can't leave your side for the rest of the game." I told him with a flat look and he lifted his eyebrows. "Damon compelled me."

He snorted. "What an ass."

* * *

So apparently this school's team was called _Timberwolves_. Obvious foreshadowing to werewolves, possibly? Like you can't have a supernatural town with vampires called Mystic Falls _and _have a football team with the word _wolves _in it. I felt like I was in a bad young adult book. Or, you know, in a shitty CW teen drama TV show. Ugh, could there even _be _foreshadowing if this was reality now? And Christ, I came from a pretty pro-football school, but not even my school had a giant bonfire lit right before the freakin' game. I guess maybe it was because it was a small town. It kind of seemed… intense. Overly intense.

"It's a full moon," Jeremy said lowly in my ear.

Apparently he had been compelled to not let me wear the freakin' Minnie Mouse hat and we weren't sure if that was done right before I found him, or if Damon had done that earlier. Dick. I was sitting up on the back of his druggie friend's truck, kicking my bare feet back and forth. Jeremy had hesitantly denied drinking with his pals as he was spending forced quality time with me. What a great brother.

"Half way through the game all the football players are going to wolf out and destroy the other team," he continued and I burst out laughing.

"…In the past we used to let other teams come into _our _town and roll right over us!" The history teacher and apparently football coach was screaming into the microphone and I scoffed.

Maybe they wouldn't get destroyed if they, I dunno, practiced football more than just the first few days of school and then have a game immediately the first Saturday? Maybe they practiced all summer. Still, this seemed over the top for the first game.

Also how were these fifteen year olds allowed to guzzle down booze in front of the school? Was the security so lax in this super small town that everyone just overlooked that? Kind of weird… But I guess this town only cared if you were guzzling down blood instead.

"And I'm gonna tell you right now, it has been a _long _time since I have seen a _kid _like _this _with hands like _these_." History Football Coach Tanner shrieked, causing the crowd to go nuts with cheering.

"Yeah I _bet _he knows how Stefan's hands are."

Jeremy snorted and elbowed me.

"Hey, Vick!" He perked up suddenly, said girl turning around and smiling at him softly. She gave a little wave and Jeremy, remembering I was forced to follow him, helped me down from the truck so we could go say hi.

"Hey guys." Vicki said warmly. "Noticed you don't have any shoes, Clare. Pretty cool."

I laughed awkwardly.

"What's up, Vick?" Jeremy asked, smiling at her tenderly and she shifted.

"Oh. Um, you know, just here to cheer on Matty…" _And Tyler_. She didn't even have to say it, but at least had the decency to look guilty. A look twisted across Jeremy's face.

"Cool, cool…"

"The hell you want, Gilbert?" Tyler's voice sliced between the three of us, Vicki springing around as he crept closer, dark eyes on Jeremy.

"Ty," Vicki said quickly, hands on his arm, apparently picking up on his dark mood. I wondered if it was national hissy fit day for dicks. "We were just talking, it's fine. Just leave him alone."

"I can talk to Vicki whenever I want, Tyler." Jeremy growled, stepping closer. Oh god, it's the full moon! They're all crazy! "She shouldn't have to feel like that's a crime. We're _friends_."

Vicki's gaze flickered to mine and I nodded, gently grasping Jeremy's arm. He shook me off and he and Tyler did the whole we're-macho-men stare off thing.

"Yeah? Well. _Maybe _you can have her when I'm finished." Tyler's voice was drenched with a cocky tone, his expression haughty and taunting. Shock hit me—did he just say that about his _girlfriend_?

Jeremy sprang forward, landing an impressive blow to Tyler's smug little face. I was too stunned to even process it, my mouth falling open.

"Shit!" Vicki bounced backwards, looking surprised and anxious as Tyler growled, bolting upward and flying at Jeremy. The two hit the ground hard and began fighting violently. I stared. "Guys, don't! Stop it, Ty! You're hurting him, you're hurting him!"

Tyler was _pinning _him to the ground, _slamming his fist into Jeremy's face_, and anger exploded inside me, waking me from my shock.

"Get off him you bastard!" I shouted, lunging at Tyler in a fit of anger. My body hit his, sending him off of Jeremy. He spun around furiously and I glared back at him.

Pain broke across my face before I realized that he had just _punched me_. In. The. Face.

"Son of a gum chewing funk monster!" I shrieked, tears springing to my eyes as I fell backwards into a pair of arms. I was seeing _stars_, a piercing, hot, pain throbbing across my cheek. Oh my God, I just got _punched _in the face!

"Holy shit, are you okay?" Vicki asked worriedly—and I realized she was the one holding me up. "Tyler, you fucking asshole!" My entire face hurt like freakin' hell! I can't believe he hit me!

I'd never been punched before!

Stefan was pulling Tyler and Jeremy apart, who, I guess decided to forsake me and start fighting again.

"Stop it!"

"You bastard!" Jeremy was shouting. "You hit my fucking sister!"

"She shouldn't have jumped in!" Tyler snapped back. That's not an apology dude!

"Because I'm going to stand here and let you beat my brother up!" I choked. Oh my God, I was _crying_! Shakily, I wiped my face and swore, my cheek stinging at the contact. Matt was grabbing Tyler by the arms, shoving him from us.

"Jesus, Ty, you hit Clare!" Matt sounded furious. Good! Everyone defend me! I just got punched!

"I didn't know it was _her_!"

"Jeremy! Clarissa!" Elena came marching up to us, looking _furious_. "What the hell? What the _hell_, Clare? Really? Are you serious right now?"

"I just got punched in the face!" I don't know why she was yelling at me!

"You can't be throwing yourself in between every situation Jer gets himself in!" She shouted back and I threw my hands up. Holy shit, why was she putting this on me?

"He wasn't in any situation! He was defending Vicki to her shitty girl-punching boyfriend!" I turned to give Vicki a half smile. "No offense."

"Oh my God, Clare!" Caroline was rushing over to me. She pulled me into a hug before pulling me back, staring at my face with a look of anxiety and fury. "Oh my God, I'll kill him! I can't believe he hit you! Are you _okay_—of course you're not," she turned to Vicki. "Piece of advice, dump that loser! Any guy who hits a girl is _trash_!"

"Is this what this is about?" Elena hissed furiously. "You're fighting because someone you like is dating someone you don't like?" She was glaring at Jeremy. "You need to pull yourself together, you know how Clare is! She's going to follow you into this _shit_, Jer!"

"Elena," Caroline stepped closer to her. "Calm down, okay? They both just got their asses kicked, so you're only putting salt in the wound!" Thanks, Caroline, great way to put it.

Stefan decided to invade my space, his green eyes gentle. "Are you alright?" He asked softly, acting all worried and crap. I cracked a grin only to wince. Jesus, ouch!

"Elena chewing me out is probably going to be a lot worse." I said shrugging my shoulders. "Maybe you can give her a compelling argument why she should drop it." Whoops! Do it, Stefan. Compel her against yelling at me. Jeremy, who came to stand next to me, appreciated the inside joke Stefan didn't realize he was a part of, and snorted.

But Stefan merely stared at me with concern, hovering near by as though preparing for Tyler to freak out and lunge at us again. I guess I was okay with him acting as a personal bodyguard.

"Clare," Caroline turned to me, big blue eyes wide and worried. "I've gotta get back, okay?"

"Yeah, it's okay. I'm fine." I assured her as we hugged.

Elena was glowering at us, looking stressed out. She put a hand on her hip, the other across her brow as though she couldn't believe we could do this to her. Today everyone was being really dramatic.

"I'm taking you both back home, I don't want to risk you fighting _everyone _over something stupid!" She said looking aggravated. "Go wait for me by the car! I just need a breather!"

She obviously needed alone time to bitch to Stefan about what horrible siblings we are. Jeremy rolled his eyes at me and I managed a half smile. Between the two of us, Jeremy was a hell of a lot more beaten up. His mouth was pretty bloody and I couldn't help but think about Damon. Elena was a dick because she sent us to her locked SUV so we had to lean against it and wait for her.

"It was kind of badass," I was saying to Jeremy. "You hit him pretty good. I'll cherish the memory forever."

"Yeah but I ended up getting the shit beat out of me." Jeremy laughed.

"Think on how Vicki is going to remember it, though. Tyler made a dick comment about her, you defended her, and he brutally hit you. You're coming out of this the good guy."

"Now what did you two get yourselves into without me?" Damon's light voice drawled in and I shrieked, jumping as I realized he was standing in front of us. He grinned wickedly. "There's something different about you two… Did you guys get haircuts?"

"I got punched in the face." I said with a shrug. Damon chuckled, looking thoroughly amused. I knew it! Pain made him laugh! He was officially a bigger dick.

"I compelled you to stay next to your brother, not stand in front of a fist aimed for him." Damon chastised with a shake of his head. "Getting matching bruises, sibling bonding at its fullest."

"It _was _aimed for her." Jeremy said with forced indifference. "C jumped into the fight I was in." Damon's blue eyes slid in my direction, his expression tilting toward serious. "It pissed off the guy I was fighting and he hit her."

"I'm protective." Over someone I've only known for like six days. Way to go me. Damon snatched the Minnie Mouse fur hat from Jeremy's head and shoved it on top of mine. Happiness bloomed and a large smile split across my face sending the piercing throbbing ache through my cheek. I hissed, wincing, tears forming. "Ouch! Don't make me smile!" I groaned, tenderly touching my obviously swollen cheek. "Ooow, this sucks!" But at least I have the hat! I'm a winner!

"Shit, Clare," Jeremy was hovering, looking guilty. "I should've known better. I'm sorry, okay?"

"It's not your fault, J. You were just doing what you thought was right and you weren't the jerkoff who hit me, this is his fault." I waved away his hand. "I'll always have your back."

"Get in the car," Elena snapped, marching up to us, sparing a glance toward Damon who smiled pleasantly at her. "I'm sorry Damon," she said tightly. "But Clare has to go."

"Bye-bye, Blue Canary!" I threw out just to spite Damon for compelling me. He stared at me as I, inwardly cackling, hopped into the SUV with Jeremy who shot me a look. I pulled my phone out, deciding to text Damon the song lyrics just to be an even bigger dick.

_I'm your only friend_, I sent to his phone.

"The both of you are idiots!" Elena began her rant as she pulled out of the parking lot. "Jer, you don't _ever _put your hands on someone, no matter what they do or say! You need to have some self-control!"

_I'm not your only friend_, I continued to text.

"You weren't even there." I said with a roll of my eyes. Jesus.

_But I'm a little glowing friend_. I wondered how pissed this was going to make Damon. I hoped he wasn't going to come into my room while I was sleeping and kill me. _But really I'm not actually your friend, but I am!_ The more I thought about it, the more this song was fitting for Damon. He really was the blue canary!

"I don't have to be there to know he was wrong, Clarissa! You have to stop throwing yourself into Jer's messes with no regard for anything else! He has to snap himself out of this! He's just going to drag you down with him! This destructive behavior ends _now_."

"It doesn't just work that way, Elena," I interrupted her softly, not looking up from my phone. _Blue canary in the outlet by the light switch who watches over you!_ Suck it, Damon. "We're family. That means I'm going to be there for him, during his darkest, and during his brightest, moments."

"This destructive behavior?" Jeremy echoed with a sarcastic laugh. "You're so full of it! I'm not dragging Clare down, she's been _helping _me get back onto my feet! It hasn't even been a full four months, I'm sorry I can't be your sweet innocent brother! I'm sorry I don't give a shit what other people think about me! You're still the same shallow bitch you were before their deaths, Elena, only now you think you have the right to lecture us when we do something _embarrassing_! All you ever care about is what other people think and how that reflects you!"

Wow, ouch. My phone buzzed. _Canary holocaust starts now. Their blood is on your hands_. Oh my god, Damon.

"That," Elena's voice shook, and broke into a whisper. "Is not true. This has nothing to do with anyone but you Jeremy. This isn't about you embarrassing me, do you even hear yourself talking right now? This has to do with you and what _you're _doing and all the wrong decisions you're making. You're failing your classes, skipping school, drinking and smoking and getting into fights…"

To be honest, this was getting awkward for me. It's like hanging out with a friend you just met and then having them and their sibling get into a huge, fiery, fight about really personally shit.

"How do you think I feel?" Jeremy exploded. "You both just shut me out! Clare was a living zombie and you lie to everyone for everyone else's benefit! You pretend it's okay but you won't ever talk about how you feel or talk to us! You act all sad but god forbid if anyone should see you! At least Clare and I have been honest about the way we feel! At least Clare came back and is helping me! You just pretend it's fine and now you have Stefan to make it _all _so much better for you but you don't even _know _him! At least _Damon_'s honest!"

"Jeremy!" I hissed and Elena slammed on the brakes, whipping her head around to look at us in the darkness, tears on her cheeks.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" She demanded quietly.

"Does it even matter? Just do whatever you want, Elena. It's not like you ever thought about anyone but yourself." Jeremy stated coolly.

"I'm sorry!" She shouted suddenly, tears falling. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry I killed them, I'm sorry I was selfish! I'm sorry! I know you blame me! I blame me too!" She broke into sobs and I felt instantly guilty.

"Stop," I whispered. "It's okay. Nobody here blames you. It's okay." I promised, soothingly. "Come on, Lena, it's okay. We've all got some issues and we gotta work them out. Maybe we'll take up that therapy idea? We could all go to therapy and talk to someone together… We need each other to become stronger—Jeremy's just been hurting alone for a long time…" What the hell was I supposed to say? What was I even supposed to do?

The rest of the car ride was dead silent and uncomfortably tense. I couldn't help but pat Elena on the arm in a comforting gesture as Jeremy slammed the car door. I followed him into the house and got the impression he needed some serious alone time. Well, mostly because he muttered a _goodnight _and slammed his bedroom door in my face. Awkward. So very awkward. I decided to finally turn that laptop the old Clarissa had to research _myself_, maybe get some insight about what kind of life she had and who the hell everybody else was that she associated with.

* * *

"A part of you _feels _for her, Damon," Stefan continued on and on, sounding _so sure_ and Damon wanted to roll his eyes. He was so _bored _of this conversation which seemed to be stuck on repeat. Unlike Stefan, he was _loyal _to Katherine, and not even her look like could sway him. "A part of you is still in there, no matter how small, I know it's _there_. You're not the monster you pretend to be. Whatever game you're playing, using Clare to hurt Elena, to get at me, it needs to stop."

Damon's fingers were wrapped around Stefan's throat before he even realized his own seething rage. It was almost a blinding, piercing, hot white anger that snapped viciously through him causing his fingers to tighten and slam Stefan into the building. All he could see was those wide blue-gray eyes peering up at him, the frantic worry that had fluttered across Clarissa's pretty face at the thought of being here only for Elena and Stefan's _happiness_. Damon felt so enraged _for _her. How _dare _Stefan think Clarissa revolved anywhere _near _his and his precious human Katherine look like's world? They couldn't _have _Clarissa! She wasn't for them!

"Try to stop me," Damon taunted, pulling his mouth into a cruel grin. "But Clarissa _likes _me, little brother. She _trusts _me. I can fill her head with _lies_, I can compel her to do _whatever_ I like. She's _my_ little pet now and there's nothing you can do about it." He wanted to hurt Stefan, with his words, with his hands. He wanted Stefan to _suffer_ mentally, wanted him to feel guilty. For everything. Forever.

Stefan shoved him off and Damon took a few springing steps backwards, his blue eyes glowing with dark mischief. "You won't hurt her." And how disgustingly _sure_ Stefan sounded. It sent a snap of anger through Damon. He could do _whatever _he wanted!

"It's _waaay _too late for that." Damon smirked at him, edging him on to snap, to fight back. He _wanted_ Stefan to attack him. "I wonder what Elena would think if she knew you were _idly _standing by while I have my fun with her sister?"

Fury ripped across Stefan's face and Damon was darkly pleased. "I'll rip you apart," Stefan growled heatedly. Damon's grin twisted upward into a wicked, taunting, smirk as he hit the ground, his younger brother's hands on his throat. "Leave her alone, Damon! She has nothing to do with us, and I won't let you punish an innocent girl for something that happened a hundred and forty-five years ago!"

"Salvatore!" A voice called angrily, Stefan freezing, his eyes widening. "What the _hell _are you doing? Get your ass in here!" Damon's grin stretched wider as he watched the dread flood his brother's face. Stefan dare even suggest he had any humanity…? He would show Stefan just how _human _he could be.

"Care for a preview of what's to come, brother?" Damon hissed darkly, easily breaking free from Stefan's grasp. His brother gave a startled cry as Damon bounced to his feet and lunged at the man, his fangs sinking into his neck.

As always, the most incredible sensation rocked him to the core, heightening every emotion, every sense. The human's blood hit his system like a shot of pure ecstasy, and for a blissful moment it was pure freedom from everything else. His longing for Katherine, his bitter rage toward Stefan. _None _of it mattered. Clarissa's grinning face managed to slide into his thoughts and Damon bit down rougher, enjoying the sickening crunch his teeth made against the man's flesh. For a wild moment, Damon wondered how _horrified _Stefan would be to see Clarissa's acceptance of all this. He could picture her shrugging her shoulders and offering a napkin. Burning amusement exploded within him, momentarily drowning out the rage, and Damon broke into laughter letting the human fall limply to the ground. He was glad Stefan mistook his laughter and Damon's amusement quickly turned sadistic, his tongue darting out to swipe the blood off his cheeks. It sizzled on his tongue.

"Are you willing to bet Clarissa's life on my supposed humanity, Stefan?" Damon taunted maliciously. "_I'm _willing to bet she'll _like _what I'm going to do to her. She's _sooo _taken with me, I'm her prince charming! I bet I won't even have to compel her, she'd willingly do whaaaatever I ask!"

Chuckling darkly, Damon left a frozen, angry, Stefan to rot with the corpse he left behind. He wasn't even surprised as he found himself slinking into Clarissa's room. Returning home would be _boring_, and he always seemed to be seeking Clarissa's company for reasons that never seemed to be very clear. Not that it mattered much, Damon wasn't one to deny himself anything. Clarissa's room was like walking into a closed off bubble that was separate from the rest of the world, her room so disgustingly _her _that Damon felt he was stepping inside her inner thoughts rather than her room. For the last fifteen minutes, Damon had been lounging on the bed next to her, the human's blood lazily rolling through him and Damon felt much like the cat who slaughtered an entire village of canaries. _Blue_ canaries. Clarissa was sitting cross legged next to him, her back against the headboard, blue-gray eyes sharp and focused on the computer in front of her. Her dark hair was pulled up into a half bun, loose black strands tumbling down her slender, bruised, neck. As his gaze slid over the ugly yellow-black bruises, an uncomfortable squeezing sensation crunched through him. He hated her bruises.

"You're an idiot," he murmured quietly, delighting in her startled reaction. Clarissa jerked, slamming her face against the laptop screen, and hissing in pain. She rubbed her forehead, turning her head to look at him.

It was nice to have someone look at him without judging, accusing, eyes and Clarissa's friendly acceptance helped soothe the biting anger that clung to him. She didn't even seemed bothered that he was lounging in the bed next to her. As always, Clarissa's eyes lightened upon seeing him, something that brought a stirring warmth which spread slowly through him. His gaze fell to the bruise on her cheek and the warmth faded instantly.

"He got you good, didn't he?" Damon wasn't in the mood to fight any urges and so reached out, gently sliding a finger under her chin, tilting her head so she was facing him fully. Touching her always brought a strange sense of calm to him, and he felt ridiculously smug watching her cheeks turn pink. But the bruise _bothered _him. "Jeremy's not even your real brother, Clary, you don't know him. You don't have to get punched to prove anything."

Clarissa released a puff of air, sighing. She almost looked resigned.

"This is my new home, and I keep hoping I'll wake up. But these strangers are my best friends and my family, and I…" Her shoulders lifted upward into a tiny shrug, and Damon wished she'd just get over hoping to leave here. She never was. She was here to stay. "I'm not trying to prove anything, D. I'm very human, and I don't do anything halfway. My anger was real and my want to protect him was real. It's really strange…"

"Like I said, you're an idiot," he gently slid his fingers across her swollen cheek, warmth sparking at the tips and making its way down his hand. He watched Clarissa relax and lean into his touch. It made his chest feel lighter. Being around her, having her react to him this way, was like breathing in sunlight on a chilly spring morning. "Who hit you?" He didn't want to think why he felt a sudden surge of protectiveness. Maybe because this was _his _human and if anyone was going to hurt her, it would be him.

"Why, D? You looking to go defend my honor?" She teased, amusement dancing across her pretty freckled face. The look shifted into a serious one quickly, her expression turning apologetic and Damon stared, baffled. "I'm sorry I offended you before. I wasn't trying to humanize you or anything. Jeremy can play the role of blue canary til I can feel secure about being here, kay?"

Clarissa was a master at making him feel baffled confusion, and Damon was startled at the familiar hiss that jolted through his chest, his stomach clenching—he was _jealous_. He was _jealous_ of Clarissa's affection for that fake brother of hers. And while he hadn't wanted to be her blue canary—he couldn't, it was out of the question—he did _not _want anybody else to be that for her either. His expression twisted, he needed a distraction. He easily snatched the laptop from her lap, bringing it closer to him.

"My nonexistent humanity is the theme of the day," he didn't know what it was about her that made him confess things, but it was already out of his mouth. He scoffed to himself, scrolling through her Facebook. "_Stefan _insisted under all the murderous tendencies and overall indifference to humans, I'm still clinging to some sort of humanity."

"Who did you kill?" Clarissa wondered, her voice free of any sort of condemning, or condoning, tones. Damon found himself turning to look at her, surprised.

"What makes you think I killed anyone?" He couldn't help it, there was a sort of curious fascination that sprang to life.

"Because Stefan basically dared you to? I dunno, that's such a Damon Dickery move. Like, I'll show you humanity as I'm ripping someone's throat out. Suck it."

A calming relief fell over him, a shimmer of fondness for the tiny human breaking through as his mouth curved into a lazy smirk. He rolled his eyes, happiness flooding. It was so stupidly easy to be around Clarissa. He flickered to her kitchen, searching for ice or an icepack. He was sick of seeing that damn bruise and he wanted the swelling to go down. It would figure, it really would, the hundred and sixty three years that Stefan had been _existing _and he _still _didn't know what made Damon tick. But Clarissa seemed to be able to grasp who he was _just _fine. So what did that say about his brother? He pushed the bitter resentment down and slid back into the bed next to Clarissa, a devilish grin flying across his face as she jumped.

"Shit, D! You need to wear a bell so I fucking know when you're coming and going!" As if he'd ever give up the opportunity to scare her. Damon shoved the icepack to her face and she cried out, slapping his hand away. He was delightfully amused by her.

"It'll help the swelling go down," he said cheerfully, slapping her hand back and gently reapplying the icepack. "Stop being a baby."

His fingers wrapped around her arm, the want to be closer to the little amusing human growing so hotly that he just couldn't resist. He easily pulled her down, uncaring as she groaned in pain, and slung his arm around Clarissa's shoulders. He was pleased that she complied, her head resting right under his chin as she curled to his side, holding the icepack to her cheek. It had been so _long _since he was simply _happy_. The feeling just wouldn't stop, it kept growing until he felt like he was bursting with glee. He didn't want to tear himself away from her side, the lightness inside of him, the sheer happiness, was so addictive. Damon knew this was going to become more problematic in the future but right now he just didn't care. He didn't understand the pull, or the bizarre relief he felt at being close, but he didn't want to understand it. He just wanted to blindly enjoy it.

"I'm sorry Elena looks like her." Clarissa's soft voice broke through Damon's thoughts and he stilled, taken aback. "It must be so awful. If I bumped into someone who looked like someone from my old life and they saw right through me, and didn't care about me, it would kill me…"

Sometimes he wished Clarissa didn't say half the shit she did, it made him fonder of her company. Clarissa could leap from talking about slaughtering orphans to being considerate about his feelings like a spring. More often or not, she left him in a state of perplexed confusion. He was still reeling, trying to figure out how to _be _in her company and why nothing she did or said had some kind of hidden ulterior motive.

His fingertips lightly ran over her bare shoulder, seeking a distracting comfort. "It's like being punched in the chest every time I see her," he confessed quietly. If anything, it was like someone had punched a hole in his chest to give his heart a painful squeeze. Seeing Elena was a terrible shock each time his eyes landed on her, he almost couldn't stand it. "But she's so obviously _not _Katherine that it only lasts for a second." The crackling hiss of missing her lasted for hours, though.

"If I loved someone the way you love Katherine, I wouldn't be able to get into a relationship with their twin." Clarissa said quietly, something Damon could agree with. "I don't know how Stefan does it. Do you think he's taking the love he felt for her and just moving it onto Elena? That's not really fair…"

"I honestly have no idea what he's doing, I just know it's earnest." Damon snorted. Despite his anger toward his brother, he couldn't deny Stefan's annoying abilities to be so _Stefan_. "Stefan is incapable of being anything but saintly." Damon was sure his brother could _easily _separate Katherine and Elena, and that was something that pissed him off.

"Until he's on human blood, then he's a psycho. You guys have no in between." Clarissa's voice sparked amusement and the anger simmered.

"Mmm, when you become a vampire it heightens _everything_, emotions especially. Happiness becomes euphoric bliss, sadness becomes crippling misery, anger becomes blinding rage," Damon explained lightly. He was becoming aware that he _liked _being able to talk to Clarissa about all of this. "A lot of vampires can't handle it so they switch their emotions off. When Stefan is a ripper douchebag, his emotions are switched off completely. And when he's a Bambi eating saint, he becomes a boring, self-loathing, bitch. He just can't go with the _flow_."

Clarissa fell silent, simply resting her head on his chest, and Damon slid his fingers through her hair. Maybe he could coax her into falling asleep while he was still here and give her horrible nightmares. He wanted to figure out what scared her so he could use it to his advantage, and, he figured, he needed to balance out being less of a dick around her somehow.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything, not even Clarissa.

wow guys I'm really happy you all are still enjoying my story! It really means a lot. To answer some frequently asked questions, no Clarissa has nothing to do with the moon-and-sun curse, I hope none of you will be too disappointed by that. But why she can't die/how she woke up in Vampire Diaries WILL be explained! It's what will make this a lot more AU. Clarissa has her own weird supernatural thing going on for her that is completely separate from Elena's. And while this is a fluff/humor story, it will have action. Just no angst. Because boo angst. I wish I could give you a timeline as to when I can update, all I can say it'll be at least weekly! I'll attempt to keep at a Damon POV, but I'm still really not sure if I'm capturing him well. Let me know how you guys feel about it!

I know some of you are kind of like "wtf" with the whole Disney thing, but Clarissa is an obsessive, impulsive, manic, hyperactive person who lives on a diet of only sugar. I'm not even kidding. Seriously guys, I've toned down her fictional self a hell of a lot. Like her Minnie Mouse obsession is way more extreme in real life. Like she spent the money for the cable bill on this giant Minnie Mouse plush doll. It's like two freakin feet tall. Worst roommate ever.

and so a huge thank you to: BrittxAngelusx, okgurl87, Peace and Love831, penny. bear. 37, Dancing under the velvet moon, eldalopez1226, CacklingBlasphemy, ty, Chaos-and-Insanity, MelissaIsLame, vikki. dillard, Ooh a jellybean, Tuggy08, DGfleetfox, Black Wolf Lady, Guest, Guest, janeyjane, Bree, flazzy cullen, LOVEYOURSTORY, hmpf, GabbyCB, Nigol, PLEASE UPDATE, Cara, Szintia. You guys are really amazing, thank you so much.

* * *

_Crap_. With a racing heart, I grabbed the sheets, pulling myself off of the floor, whining a little. I _never _had such a horrifying nightmare before that it literally had me falling out of bed. I took a breath, trying to calm my frantic heartbeat, as I slumped into the bathroom. Worst night _ever_. I might've played Left 4 Dead, but zombies scared the shit out of me. And being hunted by a pack of them in an abandoned building was freakin' terrifying. I frowned at the girl in the reflection. God I was still _so _not used to seeing this face. The bruise on my cheek was like I had gotten punched days ago instead of last night. Christ. I wondered if that would give me away. Like 'Clarissa, your bruise is less bruise-y. YOU'RE A BODY SNATCHER!' After brushing my teeth, I turned to leave when a flash of blue caught my eye and I stilled, turning my head. Plugged into the outlet was a little blue canary nightlight. _Huh_, I hadn't noticed that before. I'd always wanted one. It figures that it'd be here, _this _Clarissa seemed to have everything I ever wanted. Ha! Now it was mine!

In a better mood, I checked my phone on the vanity dresser and holy fuck, I had a massive amount of text messages and a voicemail. All from one night? Must've been one hell of a football game. Most of them were from Caroline, the others from Bonnie and _Matt_. Weird. They all pretty much said the same thing. Tyler was a dick, and the horror at Mr. Tanner being attacked and killed by an animal (in Caroline's case, the devastating news that the Homecoming dance had been canceled). Fuckin' Damon. He was a real animal alright. Like what do I even say to that? Sorry another victim has been taken, my friend was making a point to his brother and throwing a hissy fit.

I put my phone on speaker, to listen to the voicemail, as I rummaged through my closet for a nice outfit rich Clarissa so generously decided to leave behind for me.

"_Uh, hey, Clare, it's me. …Tyler._" Really. I would have had no idea that the one missed called from him would be him leaving me a voicemail. "_Soooo… I don't really remember punching you in the face, but apparently that's what happened. You shouldn't be jumping in between two guys fighting, you're an idiot_." …Thanks. "_But what I'm trying to say is… are we still going to the Founder's together? Text me._"

Best apology ever. _Not_. Though I had already sent him a friend request last night on Facebook. Nothing says 'thanks for decking me in the face I'm over it' like a friend request.

Deciding on a cute shirt with a hugging panda that said 'I wanna cuddle you so hard', and a frilly skirt, I pranced out of my room, nearly crashing into Jeremy. He caught my arm before I could fall over and die.

"Hey C." He greeted with a faint smile. He didn't say anything about the bruise so either this body always healed fast, or it was just because he was in _the know_.

I grinned. "How you feelin'?"

He shrugged a shoulder. "Pissed at Tyler. Pissed at Elena. The usual." He said as we made our way down the steps. "There's also no way in hell we're going to family therapy. That's lame."

"Talking about our shit could be helpful." I didn't think it would be helpful for me, actually. Just helpful for Elena and Jeremy. I feel like it'd become really obvious I didn't know shit past this previous Monday if I went. Jeremy rolled his eyes.

"It would be forty-five minutes of Elena time and _her _problems and _her _life and how we're just circling around it." He scoffed and I shrugged. Kind of true, though, I mean, she _is _the main character.

We entered the kitchen to find Stefan and Elena totally making out. Ew, gross! Jeremy decided to pull a dick move and abandon me, and I was left awkwardly standing there with them. Great. I stood there, waiting for Stefan's vampire senses to tingle but nope. Nothing. He must've been focusing really hard not to go ripper on her. That would literally be the worst thing ever to see. I would probably never be able to sleep again.

"I see you guys are tongue battling, very extreme sport." I decided to make this awkward for everybody. Elena and Stefan sprang apart, both looking incredibly embarrassed. _Good_.

"Clare! What are you doing in here? I—I mean…" Elena groaned, rubbing her forehead. She lowered her hand, furrowing her brow as she looked at me again. "Oh my God, Clare, how did you get those bruises?" She hurried to my side, pulling my chin up. Oh, goddamn it. "Did Tyler do this to you?" Totally. Let's throw him under the bus.

Super aware of Stefan's stare of Concerned Vampire Friend though and that was annoying. I already knew he knew who was the cause of the bruises. Jesus. I laughed awkwardly, pulling her hand away. "Chill, it's fine." Just died yesterday, no biggie.

"That guy has some serious issues." She muttered with a sigh.

"Morning, Steffy!" I decided to redirect the conversation and smiled pleasantly at him. He offered a faint smile in return. "Sooo, what's on the agenda today?"

"Well, Bonnie really needs some, um, girl time. She's really freaked out about what happened last night…" Elena trailed off and blanched. "Oh my God, Clare—it's Mr. Tanner—!"

"Yeah, I heard. I got a billion texts this morning from _everyone _talking about it. This is Damon's fault," I told her seriously, putting my hands on her shoulders, well aware of how stiff Stefan just got. Ha-ha! Elena looked at me, puzzled. "When he went to Narnia yesterday he didn't close the portal. Aslan came through. He's rabid. He's not going to stop killing."

Elena's expression became flat and she smacked my arm. "That isn't funny, Clare. Mr. Tanner just _died_." I held my hands up in defense. I thought it was _hilarious_. "Anyway, you'll have to shop for Caroline's present without me."

I stared at her, feeling lost. "Her present?"

Elena rolled her eyes. "_Yeah_, her birthday is this Friday. Remember, greatest day of the year?"

Oh. Shit. One, I didn't know where any stores were. Two, how was I getting there? Three, what the fuck was I supposed to buy her? I pulled my phone out.

"I guess I can ask Damon to come with me…" I wondered if he'd be okay with that. I mean, what else was I supposed to do? I felt a surge of panic flash through me.

"Um, actually," Stefan stepped closer and I turned my head toward him. He gave a half smile. "What if I went with you? I'll help pitch in for the gift…"

Nope.

Elena say no.

Be the suspicious, jealous, girlfriend and say nope.

She smiled happily.

Noooo, you're being a teenager wrong!

"That sounds like a great idea, Stefan!" She said brightly. "You two can _bond_."

I smiled at Stefan. "Sounds like fun." Sounds like I'm going to make you wish you never freakin' offered. In retrospect though, I totally needed someone to come with me. Or drive me. _Gah_.

I had wondered if I had a car and the answer was yes. It was a black hatchback Versa, so that was pretty cool. I was surprised to see the car was void of any dents or scratches or any kind of damage. Probably never drove it. It was a miracle I had a GPS with the location of the mall in it. I sent Damon a quick text, _gonna reveal my secret to steffy by getting us into a fatal car accident_. I mean, probably not, but wouldn't it be hilarious if I did? I set my phone down on the console between us. So this wasn't totally super awkward or anything.

"Ready?"

Stefan smiled.

Okay, then.

I began backing out of the driveway when my phone started ringing. "_Spooky scary skeletons! Send a shiver down your spine! Shrieking skulls will shock your soul, seal your doom tonight_."

I brightened, it was Damon! Special ringtone just for _him_. Clever, right?

"_Spooky scary skeletons! Speak with such a screech. You'll shake and shudder in surprise, when you hear these zombies shriek_." Stefan picked my phone up before I could grab it. Wow, rude! He glanced at the caller ID, which I had foolishly changed from Sexy to Damon. "_We're so sorry skeletons you're so misunderstood. You only want to socialize, but I don't think we should_."

"Don't worry, I got this. Just focus on driving." Stefan said warmly, bringing the phone to his ear. "Hello, Damon… Oh, I can't, she's driving." You bitch.

"Is he talking about my driving abilities?" I wondered and Stefan ignored me. "I bet he is. I drive _fine_, Damon!" I emphases my point, I swerved the car dangerously to the other side of the road, gaining Stefan's attention who instantly stiffened.

"Clare!" He stared at me with wide eyes. "I'm sorry, Damon, but we have to go."

"We're going shopping at the mall!" I said quickly but Stefan was snapping my phone shut, so I had no idea if Damon heard me or not. I hoped so. I hoped Damon knew I was going to drag Stefan into every store possible and make him wish he could die. "Aw, Steffy."

"How long have you been driving for?" Stefan asked and I had no idea. I had no idea how old _this _Clarissa was to gauge an appropriate guess. I figured I was anywhere between sixteen and eighteen.

"Don't be worried, Stefan." I assured him cheerfully, avoiding the question. "I can't kill us."

Stefan merely stared at me with those overly brooding green eyes and I puffed out a breath, tapping my fingers against the steering wheel. This was going to be a long mall trip filled with awkward silences, I could feel it.

"You should be more careful," he began softly. "Considering what happened with your parents…" Ah, he was worried about Elena's mental state if she knew I was driving recklessly. I hope he tells her. Clarissa drove on the other side of the road as a joke doing twenty miles per hour! Gasp, the unquenchable rebel thirst of it all! So extreme!

"I didn't realize I was supposed to be crippled with fear for the rest of my life and not joke around." I shot back enjoying the startled look on his face.

"That isn't what I meant," he said quickly. "I just mean… You should be safe. Cars are dangerous. I don't want you to get hurt."

"_In two hundred feet, turn left_," the GPS instructed and I scoffed. I'll never turn left, _never_! I promptly made the next right and Stefan continued to stare at me, his brow furrowed. "_Recalculating. Drive five hundred feet and turn right_."

"You're going the wrong way." He said slowly. Wow I had no idea.

"Getting lost is an adventure in itself, Steffy."

"Then what's the point of the GPS? Why aren't you following it?"

"Because she's a bitch to me."

Silence.

I tapped my fingers against the steering wheel.

Stefan snorted suddenly, amused. "You're trying to make me regret joining you." He realized, a grin on his face. I pretended to look offended.

"I didn't realize acting like myself was such a big issue. I'm glad to know my personality is so off putting." I deadpanned, grinning inwardly as he groaned. "Who should I pretend to be to appease you?"

"Nothing I say is going to be the right thing, is it?" He asked dryly. Oh boy.

"Why are you trying to say the _right _things instead of saying whatever you want to say?" I wondered. He tilted his head, surprised. "Be yourself. If we click, cool. If we don't, at least we're both showing each other who we really are." Only not, because Stefan can never know me. Never!

"I'm sorry about last night." Stefan said after another silence drifted past us. "I should have gotten to you and Jeremy sooner."

"It's not okay and it never will. Everything terrible that happens is directly your fault and you should feel terrible for the rest of your miserable life." C'mon, Stefan, get your angst out of my car.

He actually laughed instead of taking my brilliant life lesson to heart. "I'll keep that in mind. But, uh… I wanted to ask, how did you get those bruises on your neck? I didn't see Tyler do anything that would have caused those." Damn it, Stefan. "Is someone hurting you, Clare?"

I grinned. Just being killed almost daily, nothing to worry about! "Jeez, Steffy. You need to calm your burger tits, okay? This just got _way _too teen drama TV show for my taste. You've got something to say, just say it. You're skirting around it." I mean, come on. He's literally bursting to scream DAMON'S A BASTARD STAY AWAY! I can feel it.

"Fair enough." He allowed, seriously, regarding me. "I don't think you should trust Damon so easily."

"Why? Because he's a dangerous sociopath with a long history of violence?" I quipped, quoting Llama's with Hats. Stefan stared at me so shocked that I burst into laughter. I smacked his arm. "Jeez, dude, you take everything so seriously, I was kidding." Only I wasn't. "So speaking of siblings…" I glanced at him. "What's up with that necklace you gave Elena? You haven't even known her for a week and you're giving her jewelry you've had for a _long _time and never wanted to give anyone? That's fishy to me, buddy, and you've either got some ulterior motive going on or you're getting _way _too attached, way too quickly, and that's not okay."

I was extremely annoyed by the look of respect that shifted across Stefan's face. Like, I totally made it uncomfortable and called him out on being a creep, why was he staring at me like that?

"I only have Elena's best intentions in mind." Stefan said quietly which meant the necklace _does _have some kind of ulterior motive. I chewed on my lip, trying to remember if it had significance in the show. "And I admire you for speaking so honestly with me. I realize how it must seem. Your protectiveness toward your family… It's an amazing quality, Clare. I hope you never lose it."

"Yeah it would suck if I crashed the car and died, huh? I know what Elena would be screaming at my corpse. AAANNNDD I," I burst out singing. "_HOOOLY SHIT! _WILL ALWAYS LOOOOOOVE YOUUU! I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DID THIS TO ME GODDAMN IT HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME?"

Stefan sputtered but I'm pretty sure he was holding back laughter. I was hilarious, damn it. Too bad Damon wasn't here. He'd run with it. Something flickered, catching my attention, and I slammed on my brakes, startled, my heart leaping. But—Christ… I could have _sworn _I saw something in the road.

"What is it?" Stefan was back to sounding horribly concerned, his green eyes watching me. I groaned. This lack of sleep was messing with my head. I was never playing Left 4 Dead again.

"Sorry this serious talk is tweaking me out," I grumbled, rubbing my eyes with my hand. "I didn't sleep well last night and now I'm suffering from it." Like thinking I saw something in the middle of the road.

"Nightmares?" Stefan had a knowing tone of voice and I lowered my hands. Oh Damon, you goddamn bitch. Could he do that? I bet he could. I bet he could give me nightmares. I bet he _did_.

Gettin' real tired of these goddamn vampires.

"Why do you say it like that, Steffy?" I asked sending him a sly look. Nobody ever confronts the obvious shit that goes on. Stefan was being _way too_ obvious with his little _knowing _voice and I was just gonna call him out on his crap. "You standing over my bed watching me dream?"

"Wha—no!"

I decided it was a new goal to get Stefan to chill the hell out. I would break his brooding, uptight, spirit.

"I guess Elena likes you like this…" I mused. "Here I am thinking of ways to get you to stop being so… This." I gestured to his face. "Like live a little, joke around."

"What's wrong with…" he gestured to his face. "This?"

"You're like the sun, Steffy. It hurts to look at you."

I made Stefan carry around my tote bag like the vampire bitch he was. I mean, I needed to be free and unburdened. I'm a very hands on person when it comes to shopping, which means I have to pull everything off the shelves and roll around on it. That and I wanted everyone to think Stefan was pansy. Look at that loser holding a Minnie Mouse bag!

"So thanks for agreeing to pay for whatever I decide to get her." I said, ripping a shirt from the rack and holding it up to Stefan to examine. He frowned at me.

"I said I would pitch in, not pay for all of it."

"Hey… I drove us here."

Stefan drew his eyebrows together, looking at me in his concerned way. "I don't know if anyone has informed you, but you're a danger to yourself and everyone else. You should never drive again."

Twenty minutes into hanging out and I think he was getting the hang on how to appropriately respond to me. Either that or he was being dead serious. "That's right. I recklessly drove _us_ here. So if you want to get home unscathed, you best do as I say."

Stefan flicked an eyebrow upward, his mouth twitching. "I have your keys, Clare."

Like I couldn't get them back. I tossed the shirt to the side, uncaring as it fell to the ground. Stefan frowned. "I'm hungry. Feed me." What I really meant was, I need sugar. I needed a drink if I was going to _deal _with Stefan. I needed to be a lot of fun to make up for his non-fun attitude.

Elena was a fat bitch who apparently told Stefan I wasn't, at all, under any circumstance, allowed to have any kind of sugar intake. Freakin' thanks Elena, you're a great freakin' sister. I moodily picked at the fries Stefan had so kindly bought for me at the Wendy's in the food court. Like, how do you even enjoy fast food without soda? He was sitting on the other side of the table and we fell into a silence. He apparently didn't know how to handle the mood swing, which is _craaap_, 'cause vampires are apparently moody as fuck. What a tool. Any points he gained were immediately thrown to the ground and stepped on a billion times. I should've just asked Jeremy to come with me. Or Damon. Hell, I'd even take Tyler. At least Tyler could dish it back to me and keep the conversation flowing. Stefan just looked like he wasn't sure what to say, and he was trying annoyingly hard to get on my good side. But _why_? Why was it so important? Him and Elena were already a thing…

…Unless, he wanted to convince me Damon was the devil. It was already too late for that, I knew about Damon. I bet if Stefan just relaxed a little he'd be so much more fun. Like it doesn't have to be self-loathing angst vampire or out of control throat slasher, there could be an _in between_. I decided to take back what I thought earlier. I wasn't going to bother with Stefan. I didn't like him and he and Elena seemed blissful with how he was now. He _had _to be more fun around her, otherwise I wasn't sure what they saw in each other. I guess their true love wasn't picky. But he seemed like he was the type to hide everything from her and be a real… bore. How do you even have a relationship out of that? I guess for Elena it was easier to shift feeling miserable about not having parents to delighting in the idea of passionate true love in which a boy she just met who gives her special jewelry. It was just so _unrealistic_.

And boring.

So boring.

They must just make out the entire time. Or Stefan sits there and listens to her bitch about everyone and shit because _oooh Elena you look so much like Katherine_! And how did _that _work? Didn't it kill him to see the woman he loved walking around _not _being the woman he loved?

* * *

Damon was completely unconcerned by Clarissa's text, because there shouldn't be a flicker of anxiety brimming under the surface, there shouldn't be a pulse of panic at the thought. It shouldn't _matter _if something happened to her, if she got hurt. It shouldn't _matter _that she was spending time with _Stefan_. And he hadn't rushed off to find her at the mall because he was_ worried _she might actually be impulsive enough to do something that could accidentally put her in harm's way. He wasn't rushing to find her at the mall because he was _annoyed _that she was going to be with Stefan. Alone.

No.

Of course not.

He was there to mess with Stefan. He was there to rub it into his brother's face that Clarissa preferred his company.

He hadn't been _jealous_ to know she was spending time with Stefan. He hadn't been tangled up inside over it, over worrying whether or not Clarissa might come to find she actually enjoyed Stefan's company. Saintly Stefan. Special Stefan. Who was _everyone's _first choice, who _everyone _favored. No matter how fast he drove, he couldn't outdrive the scenarios that were forming in his head. He could picture himself finding her smiling at Stefan _in that way_, he could picture her telling him all her secrets, and Stefan would _win_. He would get _everything_, as he always did, and _still _act like the little self-loathing prick he was. Like _Stefan _was the one who was _so tortured_.

He found them in the food court and to Damon's pleasure neither of them were speaking. Stefan was sitting awkwardly and Clarissa seemed to be completely disinterested by the entire thing. She was staring off into the distance, eyes unfocused. Pleased, Damon sat down across from Clarissa, next to Stefan who narrowed his eyes.

"She does that," Damon said easily, smiling tauntingly at his now tense younger brother. "Just completely zones out. Short attention span. Seems you can't hold her interest, how _sad_."

"What are you doing here?" Stefan demanded as though it was the greatest offense in the world that Damon _dared _go to the mall the same time he was. As though Stefan expected a trail of limbs throughout the mall to be found. As though _Damon _was the one who couldn't control himself.

"Shopping. Found a cute little apron I'm thinking of getting. Says _kiss the cook_. Don't you just love to play with your food?" Damon's smile was feral, and he turned his head toward Clarissa who appeared completely unaware he was there. He needed to fix that immediately, he _hated _being ignored. "_Claaary_, don't be rude. Say hello to me."

She blinked, head tilting in his direction, her attention refocused. Blue-gray eyes swept over to him, and she instantly brightened, a sunny smile bursting across her face as she lit up. He felt smug, his mouth curving into a haughty smirk. He attempted to ignore the breath of relief that sighed through him at her reaction.

"Damon!" Clarissa gushed happily, the warmth of her glee spreading through his chest, causing his arrogance to swell. Reassured he was still the preferred Salvatore, he leaned back in the uncomfortable metal chair lazily. "Help me pick out a birthday present for Caroline!"

He wanted to laugh, he really did. She was snubbing Stefan's involvement, loudly, in front of him, as if Stefan wasn't there at all. As though it were just _them_. He couldn't help it, he turned to smirk in his brother's face. Stefan stared back coolly, a fake smile plastered across his face, a look of renewed determination flashing. Stefan wasn't going to win this, he didn't even stand a _chance_. Not with Clarissa _knowing _everything, not with Clarissa being so _wrapped _around his finger, not with Clarissa _openly _preferring him. Stefan would have to _loosen _up in order to get a foot in, and if he did that, then he would be risking losing _Elena_ who so preferred the brooding, prick of a bore. No matter what Stefan did, he would be _losing_ and Clarissa was going to help Damon shove his brother over the edge.

"I wouldn't want to deter you from your shopping," Stefan said, the challenge clear in his voice, green eyes narrowing a fraction with his fake friendly smile in place. Damon grinned sarcastically back at him, squinting his eyes, so wanting to strike him.

"We can do both," Clarissa said chirpily, easily pulling Damon's attention back to her. Her eyes were gleaming like sea glass, mischief flickering, and they drew him in. She was clearly onboard with Damon's plan without him ever having to say anything. "It'll be _fun_. Good old bonding. What do you say, D? Shop with me!"

"_Anything _for you, Clary." Damon purred, flashing an overly charming smile just to _piss _Stefan off more. Pleased, he watched as her cheeks flooded with red, a familiar _th-thump _of her heart leaving him feeling ecstatically smug.

"And it'll give you a chance to clear up some misconception Steffy seems to have," Clarissa continued cheerfully, a picture of innocence. Damon's eyes tilted back to Stefan who was staring at her. "He seems to believe I shouldn't trust you, D."

Oh, _Clary_.

Stefan had _no idea_ what he was walking into.

"Chasing off my friends, Stefan?" Damon asked, pretending to look wounded. He was sure he could feel Clarissa's amusement and it added to his. He turned back to her as Stefan flat out _glared _at him. "This is because of Katherine. My therapist says we're acting out, trying to hurt each other."

"D tells me Elena looks very similar to Katherine," Clarissa narrowed her eyes at Stefan who stiffened, his eyes widening with _surprise_. Damon had to suppress a wicked grin. "This isn't some sort of ploy to hurt Damon through Elena, is it?" He watched the exchange gleefully, delighted with the small human. This was _so _much more fun with inside help.

"No." Stefan said quietly, and Damon could feel the anger rolling off his brother in _waves_. "I would _never _hurt Elena."

"Strange…" Clarissa murmured, tilting her head to give him a distrustful stare. "A few days ago she came home feeling pretty _hurt _and angry by your behavior, and I was told Damon had been nothing but _kind_, while you acted like a real jerk. Few days later you're giving her a necklace. Hmm." Clarissa's fingers danced across the table as if playing the _Fur Elise_ and he knew she was enjoying this almost as much as he was.

He was viciously delighted to see the hurt flash across Stefan's face, he was _glad _when his brother turned his accusing green eyes to him. Damon _wanted _Stefan to hate him just as much as he hated Stefan. He knew Stefan was seeing Clarissa as a poor, defenseless, victim who was being feed lies and it thrilled him. That's right! He was the bad guy! The evil brother! It would make Stefan try (and fail) even harder to befriend the girl, to try to sway her away from Damon. He felt a flicker of fondness for Clarissa move through him slowly. She was loudly siding with him and it _lit him up_ inside.

"We… had a misunderstanding. We worked through it… Have you noticed the bruises on Clare's neck?" Stefan redirected the conversation, ripping the lightness from Damon. It made his chest clench oddly and he wondered why the _hell _she wasn't wearing a scarf. He stared darkly at his younger brother.

"Shit deflection, Stefan." Clarissa bounced upward, grinning. "I'm bored, let's go find something for Caroline. You don't have to come with us, Steffy, if you don't wanna. I get it, me and Damon are assholes. Some people just don't click."

Damon sprang to his feet, gliding to Clarissa's side. It was as though he had been itching to be closer this whole time, the relief humming through him as he draped an arm over her shoulders. Clarissa instantly leaned closer to him and Damon shot Stefan a dark, predatory, smirk. _Daring _his brother to leave them alone. Stefan stood, smiling.

"No, Clare, I don't mind. I appreciate you looking out for your sister." His younger brother said, his green eyes locking with Damon's. "I'll be more than happy to _prove _myself to you." And to prove how _evil _Damon was, he knew Stefan was adding silently.

"What kind of gift are we looking to get?" Damon turned Clarissa's attention back to him, delighting in her company.

"As a joke we could get her Fifty Shades of Grey," Clarissa murmured, a look of consideration, and amusement, twirling across her freckled face.

"Fifty Shades of Grey?" Stefan questioned and she snorted, rolling her dancing eyes at him.

"You need to get with the times, Steffy. It's the biggest thing happening, I'm surprised you haven't _heard _of it," Clarissa grinned and Damon immediately knew where this conversation was headed. She was talking about something that wasn't _around _yet and he wasn't sure how to _shut her up_. "This chick wrote a Twilight fanfic and changed all the names around and it's just the worst smut imaginable, like—"

Stefan was staring at her, puzzled, and understanding hit the small girl loudly, like a flickering flame her happiness went out with a single puff. It was disconcerting the way it made something inside him jolt, tripping him up. Anger towards Stefan, who always _ruined _everything, flared and he didn't miss the flash of sadness that flew across her face before she forced a laugh.

"Never mind, it's not important," Clarissa dismissed cheerfully, with a wave of her hand, ducking out from Damon's arm. "Uh—gotta pee, so…"

Damon watched her scurry toward the restrooms at the end of the food court, and then tilted his gaze back toward Stefan who didn't seem to have realized he'd upset Clarissa. Stefan was a fucking idiot and Damon didn't give a damn if it confused his little brother more, he punched Stefan's shoulder angrily. To upset Clarissa was a direct insult to _Damon_, somehow, and Stefan should have been polite and let Clarissa ramble. Waspishly, he thought about bringing it to Stefan's attention, to rub it in how _awful _Stefan was, how _Stefan _hurt Clarissa and not _Damon_. However, Clarissa, and her feelings, were Damon's secrets and so he refrained from speaking.

* * *

I hastily stumbled into the bathroom stall and promptly burst into tears. I missed home so bad right now my chest ached. I just wanted to _wake up_, I wanted a term paper and whether or not I had enough to pay the utilities be my only concern, not whether or not _Fifty fucking Shades of Grey _was a thing yet while I shopped for a pretend best friend with two freakin' _vampires_. The stall door ripped open and I nearly shrieked, jumping backwards as Damon appeared in front of me. He raised a finger to his lips, closing the stall door, and I released a shaky, tearful, laugh. Oh my God, Damon was _here_. In the women's bathroom. Because I was _crying_. He was a total blue canary and nothing he'll ever say could suggest otherwise.

"Stefan might be listening," Damon murmured lowly.

"Just need to cry for a sec." I whispered, shakily swiping my wet cheeks with the back of my hand. Damon rolled his eyes. "I know, I know. How do I look with my humanity puked all over myself?"

Damon pretended to look me over. "Not a good look on you, Claryberry." He said quietly, placing a hand on my shoulder as though delivering horrible news.

I couldn't even crack a smile and sighed, leaning against the wall of the stall, covering my eyes with the hand. "I'm just missing my old life. I should be working on a paper… instead I'm here, looking for a gift for someone who, you know, with _you _two…" I trailed off.

"You hate your old life." Damon said dismissively. "You were going to quit your jobs, forsake school. And your mother sounds like a real bitch." _True_.

"But it was _my _life." I said sadly.

"But this is _your _life. And now you can do whatever you want here, you can _live _instead of just existing. And we can have vampire dickery fun without worrying about you keeling over dead." Damon's voice was low, compelling almost, his warm fingers pulsing on my wrist, pulling my hand down. I stared up at him, my heart feeling lighter. He smirked.

"Good pep talk, D." I offered a tiny, sad, smile. "How do I look? Does it look like I've been crying?" I rubbed my cheeks. "I don't want Stefan to know."

"Who cares what he thinks?"

"I don't want him to know anything real about me." I said honestly, Damon's expression flickering. "He's not worthy enough to see me in distress. Plus I'm pretty good at these. I called them quickies."

"_Quickies_?" Damon was _amused_. "Quickies in the bathroom?"

I pointedly ignored the impish grin on his face. "Yup. I'd force myself into hysterical tears real quick in the bathroom at one of mother's events or family reunions—like a real quick three minute thing, get rid of the evidence and walk back out with a smile."

"You're pathetic." Damon told me and I laughed.

"No, I'm clever. And extremely emotional. It's easy to run on happy as long as you have a quick cry and get all the bitter resentment and years of repressed rage and disappointment out of your system." I flashed him a smile and he rolled his eyes like he couldn't believe he associated with me. "How do I look, D?"

"_Stefan_ won't be able to tell the difference." He assured me quietly. I nodded, sliding past him. He trailed after me as I made my way to the sinks.

I stared at the girl who was supposed to be me in the mirror. Well, at least my cheeks weren't nearly as blotchy looking as I feared they would be. I hastily splashed some cool water on my face and flashed myself a winning smile. I was _okay_. Stefan had so much angst there was no room for me to feel bad for myself. With a start, I realized that Damon was staring at me seriously, and I turned around to look at him curiously. For a moment he looked like he wanted to say something but instead flashed me a cocky grin.

"Ready to make Stef's life hell?" Damon's blue eyes were bright as he offered his arm, and I found myself grinning back at him.

"I have so many _plans_, D." I confessed feeling suddenly giddy, sliding my arm through his, nearly clinging to him. The closeness eased the previous hurt away and I was feeling a lot better. "I'm so glad you came, it was getting so boring, and only you can help make this day one Stefan will forever regret."

"Lead on, Claryberry." Damon smirked mischievously.

* * *

"But Stef," I widened my eyes, looking up at him as though crestfallen. "You _promised_ you'd help me find a present for Caroline."

Stefan's expression was pinched. "I… don't think it's appropriate."

We were standing outside of Victoria's Secret. Damon was standing on Stefan's other side, amusement bright in his blue eyes. If pouting didn't sway Stefan, then there was one more thing that _had _to work.

"I don't mind just _us _going in there, trying on bras, _bonding_," Damon purred suggestively, sliding toward me, his fingers dancing over my wrist. I forced myself to flinch suddenly as my heart bounced to his touch, my hand shooting out to grip Stefan's hand tightly. I threw him a panicked look, pretending to be frightened.

Damon stiffened and concerned shock splattered across Stefan's face. _Hell _yeah. Stefan's belief that he needed to _protect _me from Damon obviously would make my pretend fear _so much more _believable, forcing him to follow me everywhere. Ha. I furrowed my brow, as though confused, and hastily pulled my hand back.

"Wow that was weird." I laughed.

It's a good thing that I know everything that I know, otherwise I would've been really freakin' confused in the food court. Damon and Stefan were nowhere near subtle as they might think they are, and I'm fairly sure I'd become some kind of pawn in their eternal rivalry. It was pretty insulting to know they were _both _kind of using me to get at the other. Vampires were rude. And now both Stefan and Damon were glaring at each other. This was getting really annoying.

"Okay, everybody into Victoria's Secret." I grabbed their arms, pleased when they both let me drag them into the store. Got me some vampire bitches. I'm pimpin' hardcore. "Did you know Victoria was actually Victor? That's the secret."

Silence.

Wow rough crowd.

Stefan uncomfortably hovered next to me and now Damon was acting moody and silent. What the hell? These freakin' vampires. I swear to God. They were more emotional than a fourteen year old PMS-ing brat in a fight with a friend over a boy. Somehow I've upset Damon again. He was _fine _until I pretended to be frightened of him. But I thought he _wanted _me to be frightened? I'm so confused!

"What do you think of this?" I asked, picking up a lacey red pair of underwear. No reaction from Damon, so yeah, he was pissed off at me. _Again_. Stefan shifted uncomfortably, averting his eyes. "Can you picture Caroline in it?" Come on, Damon. Help me freakin' out here.

Stefan's green eyes widened, his face twitching between horror and embarrassment. "I… think whatever you get her, she'll like."

"But do you think she'll look _good _in it?" I pressed with an innocent frown. "We'll put this in the maybe pile." Stefan went stiff, almost statue like, as I laid the underwear over his arm and still no damn reaction from Damon. This was hilarious! C'mon, Damon, work with me here!

"Clare…" Stefan looked at me, helplessly. I ignored him and turned to Damon.

"Choose a color, D!" I suggested brightly and he flashed me a sarcastic smile.

"I think it's time for me to go," he said indifferently and I frowned. Whaaat? _No_. "You kids have fun." Oh my God, Damon, _no_!

"Noooo!" I whined, throwing myself at him. Damon easily side stepped me and I shrieked, crashing into a mannequin and hurtling to the ground pretty hard. Ouch, fucking Damon! Stefan was next to me instantly, but I ignored him and stared up at Damon, who stared down at me with his head tilted, like he didn't know what to _make _of me. "Don't leave me here with Stefan, Damon! He's so boring, I'll _die_!"

Stefan, pulling me to my feet easily, shot me a baffled look, and I figured, if Damon had always shared Katherine with _Stefan_, maybe even had to hide that he was even _with _her… Maybe that's what set him in the bad mood? Maybe I had accidentally triggered a shitty memory? Had he thought I was _choosing _Stefan over him? Jeez, he should know I was only _his _friend here. He was my blue canary! He was staring at me like I was saying crazy things again, but his blue eyes were lighting and I felt ridiculously giddy about that. I playfully took his hands into mine, swinging them.

"Quando sono sola sogno all'orizzonte e mancan le parole," truthfully, I had no idea what I was actually singing. But I always thought the song was very pretty. And I wanted to be dramatic at him. Damon and Stefan stared at me in surprise. "Si lo so che non c'è luce in una stanza quando manca il sole, se non ci sei tu con me, con me. Su le finestre mostra a tutti il mio cuore che hai accesso, chiudi dentro me la luce che hai incontrato per strada…"

Amusement danced across Damon's overly handsome face, his lips pulling into a grin. "Quando sei lontana sogno all'orizzonte e mancan le paaarole," he sang charmingly back at me, pronouncing everything with a flawless precision. My heart tripped inside my chest. Oh my God, Damon was _singing_! His grin slid into a haughty smirk. "E io si lo so che sei con me, _con me_, tu mia luna tu sei qui con me… Mio sole tu sei qui con me, con me, _con me_, _con me_!"

"Time to Say Goodbye," Stefan murmured, green eyes on me as though he couldn't believe I actually knew the song. Thanks, dick. "I didn't realize you listened to Opera, Clare."

I dropped Damon's hands and shrugged. "There's a lot about me that you will never know." I told him with a cheerful smile. "But maybe I'll tell you the story of how it came to be if you try those red panties on and pose."

Stefan _grinned _at me. "No. I'm leaving now that I know you tricked me into coming in here."

"_You_ are the one who set yourself up for it. You're so hardcore Anti-Damon for _no _explainable reason, it wasn't my fault you left yourself open to be exploited." Really. This was his own fault. Damon chuckled.

"Let him wait for us outside," he said, his tone suggestive as he crept closer to me. Glad to know he was all forgiving. It only took me slamming into the ground and singing Italian at him. Damon wasn't high maintenance or anything. He leaned closer, his arm winding around my waist and everything inside of me pulsed frantically. "Come into the dressing room with me, Clarissa, I'll show you which bras I think should be tried on…"

Damon, you little shit! My heartbeat quickened, my face on _fire_, and I found myself thinking about how he looked without a shirt on. Another wave of heat hit me and I squeaked. Oh my God, this wasn't happening to me! I never found anybody attractive and now I'm completely, embarrassingly, undone by fucking _Damon_! Ugh!

"Get your attractiveness out of my face, D!" I hissed at the smug bastard who was smirking widely at me. Stefan stepped between us as though he needed to protect my Disney virtues from his big bad seductive brother.

"Damon…"

"It can't be helped if _Clary _wants the D…" Damon grinned wickedly. Just, _fuck_, oh my God. "_My _D."

I slammed a pair of underwear into his chest. "Go try it on! The both of you. Try on panties and dance for my amusement!"

Stefan's eyebrows rose. "I'm not doing that." He said, amused. "I'm not stripping to _please _you, Clare." Oh my God, that was _it_. Stefan had given me a wonderful idea. A grin flew across my face and I turned to Damon.

"Damon, you're disgustingly attractive." I decided and he flashed me a filthy smirk. "You're going to be Caroline's birthday present."

He actually looked surprised. "You're propositioning me to your _friends_?"

"Have a sense of adventure, D. A bunch of teenage girls fawning over your body isn't exactly a bad thing. All I want is for you to be a stripper. I'll throw a slumber party at my house, and you can waltz in and just… I dunno, strip. Happy birthday Caroline!" It was a brilliant idea. Damon's look of surprised turned into a stunned one, like he couldn't _believe _I'd suggest that. Of course I would.

"No." Stefan immediately shook his head. "I don't think it's a good idea."

"Too bad, you're my strippers." It wasn't up for debate. "It'll be the _Salvatore package_."

Stefan stared at me, furrowing his brow, like he was concerned about my wellbeing and it seemed to snap Damon out of his gawking. His mouth flickered into smirk. "_Anything _for you, Clarissa," he purred and I angrily ignored the jolt that went through me. Damon turned his darkly amused grin to Stefan. "You don't have to come, Stefan. I bet _Elena _will get a kick out of it all the same, even without you there."

I dug through the tote bag, looking for the phone. "Hey, at least you guys will be even." I threw out as I found my phone and Damon grinned devilishly at me.

"That's true. I saw _her _without her clothes on, so it's only fair she see me without _mine_…"

We're such assholes. I hit my fake twin's number, putting the phone on speaker.

"No you didn't." Stefan growled, his expression darkening.

"Damon was in my room when Elena came out of the shower." I mean, we weren't lying. We just weren't telling him Elena had a towel on!

"It was reeeaaaally awkward."

"_Hello_?" Elena's voice came through the speakers, and Stefan got this funny look on his face. Like he forgot we were even standing here. Their love is the truest love of all time!

"Hey Elena!" I greeted pleasantly.

"Hiiii Elena," Damon drawled.

"_Damon?_" Elena sounded confused. "_Clare, I thought you were going to the mall with Stefan…_"

"I was, but then Stefan got rabid and beat me up and took my lunch money. He's just killing everyone, Elena, it's horrible. There's just… so much blood. He was… oh God, he was eating kittens! It's so horrible. He's fighting a giant bear now."

The Salvatore brothers stared at me, their expressions nearly identical. Like what I say is _such _a shocker!

"_Please tell me you didn't have sugar…_" That bitch!

"That's nonsense," Damon scoffed, mischief lighting his now amused face. "That's not a giant bear. It's Aslan. Stefan is seeking revenge, Aslan killed that football coach." I grinned widely. Holy shit, I said the same thing this morning! Stefan looked startled and narrowed his eyes.

"Damon!" Stefan snapped.

"_That joke is horrible and you two should stop telling it!_" Elena's tone matched Stefan, their true love having them work as one. Damon gave me a curious look and I beamed back at him. "_I'm so sorry you're alone with them, Stefan._"

"It's fine, Elena. I enjoy Clare's company." Stefan was so obviously lying.

"No he doesn't. He longs to die."

"Anyway, Elenaaa," Damon said pleasantly. "To the point of this call… Clary wants me to strip for Caroline's birthday."

Elena choked. "_Oh. My. God._"

"I was thinking we'd have a small thing at our house and Damon could pop in, dance around her, make her feel like a Goddess…"

"…And we were wondering," Damon picked up right after me. "If you would be opposed to _Stefan _joining me."

"It'd be the Salvatore Package."

"He wouldn't be _completely _naked. If you want, he'd just take off his shirt and prance around."

"Nobody would even touch him, except for you."

"_Hold on,_" Elena was laughing really hard.

"Don't I have a say in this?" Stefan asked, frowning. "I never agreed to any of this."

"You said you'd pitch in with the gift." I reminded him. "I want Damon to strip, and in order for you to pitch in… Well… Off the clothes go."

"How did this happen?" Stefan wondered, obviously retracing every step in his life that evidently led him back to this exact moment. Where did it all go _wrong _for you, Stefan?

"You decided to hang out with me." I shrugged. "And now you've become a stripper. I dunno. You just keep making terrible life choices." Stefan shot me an amused look. One day he was going to give up and just be properly annoyed by me.

"_Can I speak to Stefan for a moment_?" Elena asked and I shrugged, handing Stefan my phone. He took it and, with a _warning _look to Damon, moved out of Victoria's Secret to talk to the light of his life.

"Let's ditch him." I said turning to Damon with a grin.

"My thoughts exactly." Damon's grin matched mine.

So wrapped up in the phone call with his true love, Stefan didn't seem to notice us strolling out of Victoria's Secret. Ha! Suck it, Stefan. We made it a good distance away and ducked into Macy's. Even when Stefan figures out where we've gone, he'd still have to find us and Macy's is like a trap of death. I've gotten lost for two hours once in there.

"Mmm, maybe I should get _you _a necklace to one up Stefan," Damon murmured, his head tilted toward the jewelry case. I snorted.

"Stefan gives Elena material things, while _we _share intimate moments like having quickies in the bathroom." The words were already out of my mouth, but oh well. _Damon _knew what I meant. The woman behind the jewelry counter gave me a strange look. Whoops!

"You know," Damon's tone was mischievous. "We don't have to have quickies _just _in the bathroom. They can be where ever you want. If you wanted, even right here, right now." I grinned at him widely, but I wasn't sure if he was saying that to add to the shock value for everyone who may be listening in, or if he meant I was allowed to cry on him whenever.

Mad confusing. And it's not like I could go on Yahoo Answers and be like what the fuck does this mean? Is my vampire friend being serious or enjoying the innuendos everyone else thinks he's implying? The world may never know. Whaaatever. I snatched his sleeve to his leather jacket, pulling him further into the store.

"So I'm really sorry if I offended you before, I thought you wanted me to pretend to be afraid of you." I said as I snatched a hat off a stand. It was an overly bright red one that I could picture myself wearing at a beach. I turned around and placed it on his head. "But Jesus, way to let me crash to the floor. Dick move."

Damon's gaze held a curious look as he pulled a hot pink feathery scarf out and draped it over his shoulders. "How did you know I was pissed?"

He was _kidding_, right? "D, you got super… Not you. I was throwing _underwear _at Steffy. And then you were gonna ditch me, and leave me there to rot with him. Worse thing ever."

Despite the scarf and the hat, Damon looked very serious suddenly, like he was on the verge of saying something.

"Clare?"

Damon and I turned, finding an annoyed looking Tyler.

"So are we cool or not?" He demanded, like I was inconveniencing him. He nodded toward Damon. "Hey, man."

"Yeah, didn't you notice the friend request?" I wondered. I sent it last night. Tyler narrowed his dark eyes at me.

"Who said I wanted to be friends?"

"Who said you had a choice?" Damon asked cheerfully. True that, Damon. "Girls get whatever they want. It's easier to just accept and roll with it." A look of consideration flickered across Tyler's face. "Who knows? You _could _end up getting lucky if you appease her long enough." I smacked Damon's arm. Like _hell_! Tyler had the decency to actually looked startled.

"So what's up? What are you doing here?" I asked, loudly.

"…Trying to figure out what the hell to buy Vick. She's really pissed at me."

"Jewelry always works." Damon offered. "No matter what you do, it's forgiven at the sight of something sparkly and expensive."

"Why don't I get a gift?" I frowned. "I'm the one who got punched."

Tyler hesitated. His dark eyes slid across my face, and was that _guilt _I see? He sighed. "What do you want…?"

Wow, really? I stepped closer to him, balled my hand up into a fist, and swung at his face—and _holy fucking shit_, ouch! Pain exploded across my knuckles and I drew my throbbing hand back, tears springing. Tyler and Damon immediately burst into _fucking _laughter! Those goddamn fucks!

"Holy mother fucking shit, fuck!" I cried, hissing, springing further away. "God fucking damn it that fucking hurts like a son of a bitch! What the _fuck_, Tyler?!"

"You hit _me_, why are you mad?" Tyler asked laughing as Damon, now hat and scarf-less, gently pulled my hand into his _while _still laughing at me.

"You hit me first!" I cried as Damon smoothed my hand out on his palm, running his fingers gently over my throbbing knuckles. "I wanted to be _even_!"

"You're doing it all wrong," Damon said with a wide grin. He gently balled my hand. "This is how you make a fist."

Tyler straightened, and tilted his chin upward, pointing to his face. "Go on, Clare, hit me." He smirked, looking all smug and amused. I huffed.

"No, I already hurt myself. Go buy your shitty gift for Vicki." I waved him away with my other hand and his smirk grew.

"Fine. Oh, uh…" he paused, suddenly looking _awkward_. "Did you… get your dress, yet?"

"No. But I have time, right? When is this dance?"

"The twenty-fourth. Just let me know what color you're going with." He nodded to Damon in a goodbye way, I guess, and walked off toward the jewelry. Weird. Why did it always get weird and awkward with Tyler? Well, I guess that wasn't true. Last time it ended in me getting punched in the face.

"He's dating the girl your fake brother is madly in love with, he punched you in the face, and he's taking you to a dance?" Damon murmured, his voice holding a slight edge to it. I shifted a shoulder upward, looking up at him.

"His mother wants us to be seen together." I said as Damon continued to soothingly run his thumb over my knuckles. "It's to the Founder's Park Dance… thing. I dunno." Something flickered across his face.

"They still have that? _I _attended the very first one." He looked mildly amused. "But a bunch of obnoxious individuals who are most likely wealthy and stuck up throwing an _event_? Oh Clary, you need me to come with you. Who else will join you for a quickie in the bathroom?"

I looked at him curiously. "I'm sure I could get Care to take you…" I said thoughtfully. "Does the Lockwoods and this party have something to do with a Damon Dickery scheme of yours, D?" He had brightened when he learned I was texting a Lockwood, he was overly friendly with Tyler… I narrowed my eyes thoughtfully. And he seemed eager to go to the dance. Surprise sprang across his face. "Don't give me that look. I notice the things you say and do. 'Cause I'm your _buddy_." I poked his chest. "If you don't wanna tell me, then fiiiiine. Let's go look at the furniture."

I started to skip away but Damon kept my hand in his. I tilted to look back at him and he rose my hand to his mouth, planting a small kiss on my throbbing knuckles. Oh hell, there goes my heart, tumbling around in my chest. I puffed my warm cheeks out and he smirked.

The furniture was on the lower level way in the back and as we wandered around I realized we were completely, and totally, alone. Like there wasn't _anybody _around, not even the people who worked there. Why did that always happen? It's like Macy's furniture section was a ghost town.

"Finally _alone_!" Damon exclaimed suddenly with a wicked grin. The next thing I knew I was tossed onto the Barbie Princess fake bed set and Damon was hovering over me with a playful grin. He slapped a hand over my mouth. "Let's do it right here, Clary! Let's just go wild and make out!" Amusement bubbled, and I burst into laughter against his palm.

"Aheeem."

Stefan totally would decide to find us at this very hard-to-explain moment. I tilted my head. He was looking vastly amused, his eyebrows raised. I had expected Damon to spring away from me. But he didn't. He merely pulled me back to my feet and into his chest, cuddling me to him. My cheeks warmed.

"Go away, Stef. Can't you see we're in the middle of the throes of passion?" Damon said theatrically, nuzzling against the top of my head leaving me slightly perplexed as to what had caused his sudden affectionate mood.

Even though I knew he didn't mean any of this, a delighted joy sprinted through me, my heart racing gleefully. I… really liked the way his arms felt around me, easily bringing me comfortably against him, making me feel _stupidly _safe and secure. He was so warm and it felt like my entire body was melting into him, buzzing with a happiness I couldn't place. I curled my fingers in the front of his shirt, struck with an irrational want to stay like this.

"We're going to meet Elena at the Ruby Tuesdays—"

I gasped excitedly, bouncing out of Damon's embrace. "Oh my God, I love Ruby Tuesdays!" I screeched excitedly, prancing to Stefan and grinning widely. He grinned back at me and I smacked him in the face with my tote bag.

"C-Clare!" He cried, raising a hand to his cheek in shock. Pansy, it didn't hurt! I flung myself back at Damon, bouncing on my heels and he grinned back down at me.

"When I die, I'm going to go Hogwarts on a deserted island with a Ruby Tuesdays surrounded by my favorite fictional characters for all eternity!" I told him gleefully and he nodded, as though it were the greatest thing I'd ever said.

"Why did you _hit _me?"

"Because Ruby Tuesdays, Stefan!" I gushed, feeling almost sugar drunk with giddiness. Combined with Damon's affection and the idea of going to Ruby Tuesdays, I was just so fucking _happy_. "It's the ritual! Ruby Tuesdays slap! Let's take one car. I'll drive!"

"You don't have to." Stefan said quickly. "I could drive. Or Damon could drive."

Only ever takes one time in the car with me to say that!

"Let Clary drive." Damon slid an arm around my shoulders, tugging me closer. "Don't be such a baby, Stef."

"Five minutes." Stefan said with a grin. "Five minutes is how long it'll take for you to regret that."

"Steffy is just a pansy. He cannot handle all that is Clarissa Lill—"

"Sunny." Damon cut in and I blanched. Oh god _damn it_, I forgot my new name! Damon tugged me closer so I was tucked into his side. "And you are so very _sunny_!"

* * *

"Shut the _fuck _up!" I snapped as the GPS recalculated for the hundredth time, the shit for brains computer voice grating my nerves. Damon was in the passenger seat, staring at me incredulously, Stefan in the back. "I can't fucking stand this shitty ass GPS! This is fucking bullshit!"

"She has road rage," Stefan sighed and I wanted to stab him.

"Stefan, for fucks sake, shut your stupid whore mouth or I'll fucking kill us."

"Clary," Damon cooed gently. "Calm down. You're going to flip the car. And as much as I am up for doing crazy things, I don't think you'll be happy with a totaled car… Think how boring it'll be to sit through Elena's lectures?"

"Damon, I want you to throw the fucking GPS out of the fucking window!" I exploded as the GPS recalculated again. I tossed him a look and he stared back at me as if stunned, a strange look on his face. What the fuck? "Do it!"

He blinked and to my surprise, he rolled his window down, ripped the GPS from the windshield and threw it out the window. Oh. My. God. My anger sizzled, falling away, as I stared at him in open shock. Oh my God, he actually did it.

"Damon!" Stefan hissed. "Why would you _do _that?"

"Because, _Steffy_, Clarissa _asked _me to! Why the hell else would I have done it?" Damon snapped back, sounding annoyed suddenly. "Clarissa, you need to calm the fuck down! You're all over the road! And now you don't have a damn GPS!"

I slowly pressed my foot down on the gas, accelerating. What's the _worst _that can really happen? A lot of horrible pain? It's not like I can _kill _us.

"Clare, slow down." Stefan demanded in a way that just pissed me off a little bit more. I drove faster.

"You're going to get yourself _killed_." Damon hissed angrily. We both know I couldn't. What was Damon freaking out over?

"Challenge accepted."

"Challenge—?" Damon began with a growl and I swerved angrily into the next lane, nearly hitting the oncoming car. Damon's hand shot out and grabbed the steering wheel, jerking the car back over to our lane. He was suddenly in my space, his fingers snatching my chin tightly and forcing me to look at him, his blue eyes locking with mine, mere slits. "_Stop driving_," he hissed furiously and I found myself slamming on the brakes without really understanding _why_.

I blinked, realizing he was no longer in the car. Oh _G_—the door flew open and I found myself being yanked out of the vehicle, my back slamming into the side of the car as he trapped me with his body, looking so furious that my heart dropped into my stomach.

Stefan was suddenly on my other side, reaching for my arm. "_Don't_, Damon," he was saying lowly, his voice a warning. With a growl, Damon shoved Stefan backwards and whipped back around, pinning his blue eyes to me. I swallowed.

"It's okay, nothing would have happened." It's not like I can _die_. Was he forgetting that?

"Are you fucking _insane_? What the _hell_ is up with that little power trip you just pulled?" He demanded dangerously. He was so _angry_. "Why the fuck would you put yourself in danger like that? You will _never _get behind the wheel of a car ever again, Clarissa. You will _never _want to drive any car, ever again, for as long as you live."

I blinked, feeling dazed for a moment. I couldn't understand why, but an overwhelming urge to ask Damon to take over driving struck me… I furrowed my eyebrows, looking up at him.

"Damon!" Stefan snapped. "Stop it! She's a _human being_! Not something you can just _bend _to your will!"

Did Damon just fucking compel me?

"Oh _shut up_!" He snarled, turning away from me. "Just shut up, Stefan! I'm doing you a _favor_, I'm keeping Clarissa from stupidly getting herself killed—how would Elena react if she lost _another _family member?"

"Don't pretend this has anything to do with me or Elena!" Stefan snapped back. "Step away from Clare, Damon."

It was like a crackling hiss snapping through the air, a dark fury was rolling off Damon and I wondered how Stefan could possibly ignore it. He was basically _begging _Damon to do something dangerously impulsive. Gently, I slid my fingers over Damon's hand, snapping his attention immediately toward me even if he stayed in a lock down with Stefan. I could _feel _his attention shift over, it was so _tangible_.

"Are you guys _roleplaying_?" I asked in an attempt to defuse the ticking explosion that would be Damon. I mean _come on_, what else was I supposed to say? If I hadn't known the whole vampire thing, I would be really lost. "Hey I'm not judging. If that's what you do, spontaneously start roleplaying in the middle of the road, whatever."

They were both dead silent, like they had forgotten I had been standing here and now had no idea what to do. Damon's fingers twitched and I waited for him to pull his hand back. But he didn't. Instead, he drew my hand into his, warming me.

"So, I'm real sorry about that, guys…" I continued, realizing nobody was going to speak. "I get a little crazy when driving. It's the same thing that happens when I hold a nerf gun. It's why nobody ever lets me drive, but… I dunno, I think I'm done with driving. So…" Damon's thumb ghosted over the back of my hand.

"Get in the car, Clarissa." His voice was quiet, but it didn't feel like he was about to snap my neck and go on a killing spree.

Stefan suddenly began to laugh, startling me. "Did you tell me to shut my whore mouth or you'll kill us?" Stefan apparently thought this was the funniest fucking thing in the entire world. Holy hell. "Nobody has ever talked to me like that."

"Get used to it, burger tits." Stefan obviously was out of the loop because this was all pretty much typical things to say. I skipped around the side of the car and jumped into the passenger seat.

And we were back to silence.

Oh man, this is how the day started.

I smacked the knob on the radio, turning it on.

"—_OWLS WILL GET YOU WHILE YOU SLUMBER!_" came blaring out of the speakers and I brightened. "_IN THE NIGHT THEY'LL COME FOR YOU AND TEAR YOUR CRAZY LEGS IN TWO! BECAUSE YOU'RE THE KING OF THE BEAVERS!_"

Damon stared at my radio like he couldn't believe what was playing. His blue eyes shifted in my direction and I grinned widely at him. This was a good song! He ejected the disk and threw it out the open window.

"Hey!"

"How they hell do you go from singing Andrea Bocelli to listening to _that_?" Damon demanded, pulling the car back onto the main road and driving.

"It's like I'm _two _people." I faked a gasp. "Nooo, but seriously, I'm full of surprises. I'm balls to the wall complex, D. I've got many awesome layers. I'm an onion. And I make everyone around me cry." A thought suddenly occurred as Damon shot me a _look_. "But you guys are into Opera, right? There's this one song I heard a long time ago, and I could never figure out where it was from and what it was called… Here, wait, lemme hum it. Maybe you guys know it."

I hummed the only part I could remember, swaying my hands about to the tune.

"Je ris de ma voir si belle en ce miroir," Stefan sang along softly to my humming and I brightened excitedly, turning around to grin widely at him. "Est-ce toi, Maaarguerite, est-ce toi? Reponds-moi, reponds-mooooi… Reponds, reponds, reponds vite."

"Oh my God, that's it! That's it! I can't believe that's it! After all this _time_!" I gushed. "You guys are amazing!"

"The Jewel Song in Faust," Stefan said with a faint smile. I glowed. This was _fate_!

"_Really_? Faust is the whole reason I want to learn German. I even had the GPS set on German for a while—oh, it's gone now…" I remembered I asked Damon to throw it away. Aw. "Anyway. That's funny. The song I had been dying to know was from the Opera of one of my favorite books."

"You've read Faust?" Damon sounded intrigued. "That's one of my favorites, as well." Ugh, my heart freakin' skipped a beat. "Hard to imagine you sitting there and reading it, though."

I huffed. "If you prefer it, I shall stay, With you, and I shall not depart. Upon condition that I may, Amuse you with some samples of my art." I quoted happily. "I fell in love with Mephisto, he's one of my all-time favorite characters. Faust actually helped shape my earlier outlook on love. Don't bend your virtues for a charming stranger who claims he loves you because he's sold his soul to the devil, will knock you up, and bring only misery and death."

"By the pangs of despised love! By the elements of hell! I wish I knew something worse to curse by it as well!" Damon quoted with a wicked grin. He appeared to be completely over being mad at me. "I'm so _un_surprised he's your favorite."

"We might have a copy of it back at the boarding house." Stefan murmured. "You're welcomed to borrow it."

"I wanna learn German first. When I reread it, I wanna read it how it was _meant _to be read." I said with a shake of my head. "But thanks."

* * *

"What took you so long?" Elena wondered, standing up from the bench she was sitting on outside of Ruby Tuesdays.

I was back to being super excited. Stefan smiled at her fondly, swooping down to kiss the side of her head and I took Damon's hand, giving it a comforting squeeze. I don't care what anyone says, that has to be super painful to watch.

"Your sister has been banned from ever driving again," Damon said pleasantly and I shot him a look. Dude, what? No. Don't be like that. She'll chew me out. He laced his fingers with mine. "She told Stefan, and I quote, shut your whore mouth or I'll kill us, end quote."

Elena fixed her angry dark eyes on me. "_Clarissa_."

"Damon threw the GPS out the window." I dragged Damon under Elena's soul-devouring bus with me. Burn, you bastard.

"Only because I'm unable to deny you, Clarissa." Damon said solemnly. "I am smitten." I snorted. _Riiiight_.

"Whatever, I want noms." And soda. Mostly soda.

"It's been… an interesting day." Stefan commented on lightly, opening the door for us. I skipped through, cheerfully surprised when Damon continued to hold my hand. I figured he needed the little emotional support it brought seeing Stefan get all romantic with a chick who looks like Katherine. Double ouch.

"Did you guys get to know each other better?" Elena asked hopefully as the hostess greeted us with a smile.

"Welcome to Ruby Tuesdays. Four?" She asked kindly and I grinned.

"Booth, please?"

"I don't think I would be able to get know Clare even if I had an eternity to do so," Stefan said warmly as the hostess lead us into the restaurant. Har-har Stefan, you toolbag. "She's… balls to the wall complex."

What the hell, Stefan? I shot him a look but he just _grinned _at me! Elena laughed. The hostess led us to a booth in the corner, far away from everyone else. Damon slid into the booth next to me, Stefan and Elena across from us.

"Well it sounds like you guys are getting along well now."

"Nope." I disagreed and Stefan leaned across the table, fixing me with a grin.

"Yes. Clare is just _pretending _to dislike me." Stefan said easily, suddenly self-assured and almost, dare I say it, _cocky_. "You, Clare Gilbert, _enjoy _my company." What the hell was he talking about?

"How sad that you need to lie to yourself, Salvatore." I scoffed. "There is nothing about you that I like. I prefer to not be in your company at all."

"And yet, you demand that I strip." Stefan continued and I nearly dropped the menu to the ground. Elena rose her eyebrows.

What just _happened_?

Who was this _Stefan_ that's come out?

And why the hell was Damon being so quiet? I felt annoyed. Stefan needed to stop being overly mushy around Elena, it was obviously difficult for Damon to handle. I mean, he might as well be here with Katherine! And now he was suggesting—what the hell is he even _suggesting_?

"Perhaps, Stefan, it is _you _who is so desperate for my attention that you've deluded yourself and created a fantasy in which I'm taken with you." I tilted my chin upward and smiled at him coolly. "I'm very aware you Salvatore brothers enjoy a good love triangle, but Elena and I don't play such games. Whatever you're doing, leave me out of it."

"Clarissa," Elena looked shocked. "Apologize! You know that's not what Stefan was doing!" Oh like _hell _I was going to apologize! Why the hell does she always take everyone else's side but mine? I've done nothing but be a supportive sister! Christ!

"I didn't mean to offend you, Clare," Stefan said quietly, looking hurt and apologetic. Shove it up your uptight vampire butt, Stefan! "I was only teasing."

"I'm not going to apologize to your boyfriend, Elena. Respect my feelings instead of jumping down my throat. I don't like him, and I don't like what he's done to Damon, and until _Damon _forgives him, I will feel nothing but cold indifference for you, Stefan, because you don't even deserve my hate for everything you've done." I turned to Damon who was staring at me. "Let's go. I don't want to eat with them."

"You only know his side of the story." Stefan said lowly as Damon helped me out of the booth. "It's _complicated_."

"I don't care about your side of the story." I shrugged.

"Clare!" Elena looked at me, torn, like she was ready to cry. And I thought it was really dramatic. So what if I didn't like Stefan? It wasn't the end of the world. "Stay. We can talk about this!"

"Thank you for inviting us out, Elena." Damon murmured softly, his fingers on my shoulders.

The very moment we stepped foot out of the restaurant I found myself being shoved up against the building, Damon's body so dangerously close to mine a strange electric heat coiled around me like a snake. His hand was over my mouth suddenly, and, with a flutter, I realized he had his mouth pressed to the back of his hand. He was, in a sense, _kissing _me. He pulled back, tense like he was ready to bolt, a strange, conflicted, look in his blue eyes. My heartbeat quickened and veins crawled over his face. Holy hell, he was going to vamp out.

"_Car_," he demanded in a low, almost strangled, voice and I had a feeling I might have crossed the line defending him.

"I couldn't help it, D." I said after a few minutes of silence. His fingers were tight around the wheel. "She looks like Katherine, and it made me so _angry _that he was all over her in front of you. That's disrespectful. That's rude. That's hurtful. I'm protective."

The car slowed to a stop and I glanced out the window. I had no idea where we were.

"I… can't be what you want me to be, Clarissa." Damon's tight voice turned my attention back to him. He looked almost… fragile, in a way, his blue eyes hesitant, his eyebrows drawn together.

"You already are." I didn't understand why that was so hard for him to understand? "There's nothing about you I want you to change. Even when you pull a dick move and compel me. I'm not even asking you to be my friend back, I get it. It's not your thing. It's kay." I grinned at him, trying to ease the tension. "I'm not going to apologize for defending you though. If—"

I stilled at the look of he gave me. It was so _intense_, almost devouring, and it sucked all the air out of my lungs. He leaned closer, taking my face in his warm hands, his fingers sparking a hazy warmth. My heart jerked and twitched around in my chest.

"Just this _once_." Damon said quietly, his voice curling around me, his fingers stroking my skin. It was almost as though he were clutching onto me. "You are my tiny, _tiny_, exception, Clarissa Lillian Everett. Do _not _make me regret this." My heart skipped a few beats, hit my stomach and flew back up. A large grin burst across my face before I could stop it and he rolled his eyes, pulling back. _Blue canary_.

"You could try to regret this, but it'll be the best years of your vampire existence." I told him confidently. "I'm amazing. We're going to party like it's 1864! Start an angry mob with pitchforks and torches, then we'll burn down a church!"

"I'm going to start killing you now, and I don't know when I'll stop."

"Aw. Too soon?"

* * *

Damon's violent reaction to Clare's reckless driving had confirmed a theory that had wormed its way into Stefan's mind. He had been watching the two and the way they spoke, looked, and acted around one another incredibly closely. Stefan was certain Clare was aware of what they really were, and he was also certain that Damon was in a lot of denial on what was happening. The happier Clare was, the more playful Damon became, and they swirled around each other brightly.

Stefan decided to continue to play ignorance and push the both of them to react and grow closer. He could deal with Clare's dislike as long as it meant it made Damon more fond of her. Stefan was much more subtle than they were. A flicker of hope filled him. Clarissa Gilbert was going to bring Damon back from the edge and for the first time in the last one hundred and forty-five years, Stefan believed he was going to be able to call Damon his brother once more.

* * *

Couldn't help but throw in a small thing on Stefan's end, to show that he's been purposely trying to see what kind of reactions he can pull out of them. Clarissa and Damon aren't as smooth as they imagine themselves to be, and Clarissa's kind of obvious about being in "the know". Stefan's not dumb. He's totally shipping them. Goes home and writes in his journal about his OTP. 'they held hands today LOL'

Thanks for reading!


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, not even Clarissa!

Gah, so sorry guys! I really tried to get it out to you all on Sunday (especially since a few of you were having bad days) but I ran into some real life troubles. I'm still really excited and thrilled that you guys like this story so much! I hope I continue to make you guys happy.

guys I've finally gotten my roommate up to the part where Damon's bitten and Stefan strikes a deal with Klaus. Witherychode, our Clare, thinks this show is a comedy and hasn't stopped laughing. literally this is what she's been saying: "Have another blood bag, mate! Oh no, Santa Claus, I can't. Two is my limit. Another one? Well... okay. I'm going to drink you under the table. Hey let's go kill a bunch of people! LOL BFF vampire dickery" I tried to explain to her that this is all very upsetting and sad, and that her love interest (Damon) is dying but...

A giant freakin' thank you: Peace and Love831 (we'll be sure to have Damon to give Clare some jewelry with vervain in it once he gets over being a dick and acknowledges it's all for the best), XxxBrEnDaxxX, MelissaIsLame (HAHAHA! OH MAN! I actually wrote that out, Stefan chickening out and Clare stepping up. The chapter panned out a lot differently and I liked this version better ;D), bee, mkittycat1 (I've been living with my roommate for like... two and a half years, she's nuts, this is how she talks ha!), Britt, ADORATIO, Tuggy08, Apatu, vikki. dillard, Black Wolf Lady, iheartanime07, tvdspnislife, CacklingBlasphemy, RosesMoon, flazzy cullen, Cara, DGfleetfox (I love your idea, and I know exactly how to work that into the story :D), janeyjane, ty, MelissaOnTrack111, Guest, oriely, 1llu510n, karmen238, Egyptian Kiss, Szintia, really bad day (I'm so sorry I hope the exam went alright!), Poodle (same to you, so sorry I couldn't get this out sunday!), majorette, Juliedoo, Alma

* * *

It was Friday, making this eleven days since I woke up in Vampire Diaries. It was also my new best friend's seventeenth birthday which she considered to be a filler year. Which was just ridiculous. Being seventeen was the greatest! Life was falling into a comfortable groove and I was starting to accept that this was reality now. Whatever. Nothing between Damon and I changed after he told me I was his _tiny _exception (translation: I was the greatest thing to ever happen to him and we were besties). Stefan had cornered me in the kitchen later that day to let me know we _would _become friends and he would do whatever it was necessary to prove himself. Really dramatic. Vampires were really, really dramatic. I guess when you live forever every day has to be crazy like that, I dunno. I was kind of surprised. I mean I had been outright bitchy to him and it didn't even seem to matter. Elena had smacked me in the face with a pillow later on because apparently Stefan couldn't take a joke and asked her if Damon really saw her naked.

Christ.

In the meanwhile, I had found out Jenna was still in college (meaning the Gilberts had to be loaded/Elena's parents had amazing life insurance), I found out my birthday (I was seventeen) and that I was also a Junior. These things were very difficult to figure out, and took a lot of subtle detective skills. Pfft. No I'm kidding. It was like a three minute thing on Facebook.

"What's with all the blue canaries?" Jenna asked as she hurriedly tied her hair up into a ponytail, grabbing a folder off the counter. I looked up from my toast, half wondering if Damon had finally made good on his Canary Holocaust text. I imagined there were just a slew of dead birds out in the yard.

"I don't know." Elena said distractedly, texting. "They're in almost every outlet." Her eyes shifted in my direction and I rose my eyebrows. Waaaait, what?

"There's blue canary nightlights everywhere?" How the hell did I miss that? I glanced around, realizing there were three in the kitchen. What the hell, Damon?

"Must be Jer, then." Elena shrugged, glancing down at her phone again and grinning excitedly. "Bon's here, grab the bows!" I scooped up the bows and wrapping paper, following after my pretend twin.

"Tell Caroline I said happy birthday!" Jenna called after us.

We were going to school early to do that obnoxious WRAPPING PAPER ALL OVER THE LOCKER L-O-L BIRTHDAY thing. To be honest, I was actually kind of excited about it. I pranced into the back of the car and Bonnie shot me a wide grin that I returned.

"So I managed to convince Care to just have a small little thing at your house," Bonnie said excitedly. Yeees.

"Stefan's still game, right?" I asked, because God help him if he wasn't. Elena nodded with a grin, her brown eyes gleaming with amusement.

"Yep! He was really worried I might not be okay with it, but this is way too funny to pass up."

"_Funny_?" Bonnie scoffed. "They're smoking _hot_, Elena. This isn't going to be funny, it's going to be _sexy_."

I pulled my phone out, sending Caroline a quick text: _HAPPY BIRTHDAY BITCH_. I had also texted Tyler and Matt letting them know they had to shower Caroline with attention and wish her a happy birthday or else. Matt texted back with an _lol k _and Tyler basically told me to go fuck myself. That friendship was coming along nicely. My phone buzzed and I flipped it open, seeing a text from Damon: _Excited for later?_ Hell. Freakin'. Yeah.

"_Well_," Elena began with a small laugh. "Maybe… But I think it's going to end up being really funny, instead. Stefan is going to be so _cute_."

I texted Damn back: _you're a winner_.

"I don't think cute is the right word…" Bonnie trailed off.

"Yeah, seriously. More like painful awkwardness." I imagined he'd look a lot like Edward Cullen when he and Bella have a kiss scene. Face all scrunched up and constipated. Just waiting to vamp out and kill everyone.

Caroline texted with a: _better have gotten me something good as a present whore_

Oh, just you wait, Caroline. Just. You. Wait.

"I don't think it's going to be like that either." Bonnie said in her mystic voice. "I'm the one with the accurate predictions. It's gonna be so sexy that no other guy will ever measure up and Caroline and I will hate you two for having the Salvatore brothers."

Damon was pretty quick at replies just like Caroline. I wondered if it was because he was a vampire and had vampire speed, or if it was because he was bored and lived only to text me back. His text: _THE WINNER ALWAYS MURDERS THE PARTY! _Oh, Damon.

"I'm not dating him," I reminded distractedly.

"You're going to wish you were once his clothes come off." Bonnie said in a singsong and my cheeks burst into flames. Stupid Damon and his stupid perfect body. "Ha! I knew it! Look at your face!" Haaar, haaar, hilarious.

* * *

"Hold these," I shoved the bows and ribbons into Matt's arms as Elena and Bonnie pulled out a huge piece of sparkling pink wrapping paper. It was overly bright and shiny, perfect for Caroline. I tore off a piece of tape and smacked it down on the edges of the wrapping paper. Perfect.

Elena pulled a few bows from Matt's arms and handed them to me as Bonnie started taping the bright yellow ribbons to the wrapping paper. I bounced on my heels, getting giddy.

"I don't know how you roped me into this." Matt frowned as I put a bow in his hair. I decided not only was Matt kind but he was super cool. I mean, he was letting me put a giant pink bow in his hair!

"It's for Caroline's _birthday_," I stressed. "That makes her queen. When it's _your _birthday, you can be queen too."

"I better be." Matt grinned. "I expect a tiara and glitter and for you four to be throwing rose petals down as I walk." Oh my God, why did Elena leave Matt for _Stefan_? Matt was fun!

"You know better than to say that to Clare," Elena laughed and Matt's smile turned fond. I suddenly realized why he was letting himself be our bitch. _Elena feels _were powerful.

"Mmhm, she'll take that seriously." Bonnie said and I realized all I had to do in life was get everyone to fall in love with Elena, and then they'd bend over backwards doing whatever I wanted in hopes to appease her through me. "She'll follow you around all day."

The perks of being the sister to the main character was awesome.

"Dude, you are so whipped." Tyler said with a shake of his head as he approached us, giving Matt a look. I grinned at Tyler and he gave me that dumb guy-nod thing. Ugh, lame!

"You say whipped, I say living the high life of being surrounded by chicks." Matt countered playfully, Bonnie smacking his arm. I pulled the tape off the bottom of a blue bow and stuck it on Tyler's chest. He shot me a look.

"I'm not wearing this." He refused flatly.

"It's a two second thing, Ty," Matt laughed.

"Yeah, and you _owe _Clare," Elena agreed cheerfully. "You punched her in the face."

Hmm, I never thought about it that way. And judging by the awkward look on Tyler's face he either felt guilty about it or was wishing he could have punched me harder. Like Stefan, I possibly have another unwilling minion to do my dark bidding. Caroline came prancing to us, squealing, wearing a sparkly tiara with purple fluff trimming the edges and _17 _in big flashy letters. She threw her arms around me and we squealed together.

"Happy birthday, Care!" I gushed as Elena and Bonnie pulled Caroline into a large hug.

"Uh—hey," Matt said awkwardly. "Happy birthday." He elbowed Tyler who rolled his eyes.

"Whatever. Happy birthday. I'm out of here." Tyler grunted, sticking the bow to Caroline's locker and walking off. Aw.

"Okay, come eat lunch with us!" I called after him. "Birthday lunch!" Bitch better do it. I shoved the camera into Matt's hands and he grinned.

"Everybody say, _'_Caroline's Queen'!"

We hugged Caroline who was bouncing with glee. "Caroline's Queen!" We chorused, Matt snapping the picture.

He handed me the camera back and I shoved him over toward Caroline. They shot each other an awkward look for a moment before Caroline struck a pose and Matt pretended to bow to her like the queen she so obviously was. I grinned widely, taking the picture, and then a few more of Elena, Bonnie and Caroline. Matt promised to stop by at lunch to say hi, and then made moony eyes at Elena before walking away. Aw, poor smitten Matt.

* * *

"You better have one of _the _most amazing gifts," Caroline was saying, arms linked with mine, as we made our way to the cafeteria. "Do you know how many people I had to cancel on? It was going to be an epic party!"

I grinned at her. "It will be _worth _it. True me, Care. You will be thanking me for an eternity."

Caroline narrowed her baby blues at me. "It's either going to be the greatest thing, or I'm not speaking to you for, like, a day! I'm serious Clarissa Gilbert!" Ha!

I was completely unfazed by her threat, because even if Stefan messed it up, Damon strutting around like the king of all things sexy would make up for it. My thoughts tilted back to how he looked without a shirt on, how goddamn attractive his stupid body was, and my cheeks instantly warmed. …Oh hell, was this a good idea for _my _state of being? I probably wouldn't survive his strip. I was probably going to just _die_.

"There will be no _checking out _on my birthday, Clare!" Caroline's voice snapped me out of my Damon-centric thoughts and I grinned sheepishly at her as we reached our usual table. "You have to remain completely focused on me! I'm the Birthday Queen!"

"Okaay, okay!" I grinned, plopping down between her and Bonnie. Elena and Stefan were on the other side of the table. I pulled out my bag, just as Matt came over, sitting between Stefan and Caroline. Yeees, excellent.

"What are you doing here?" Caroline rose her eyebrows as I dug through my bag for the birthday lunch.

"It's your, uh, birthday?" Matt offered with a quick glance to Elena who was smiling back at him faintly. Caroline looked between the two.

"Uh huh."

I threw a stack of lunchables down on the table and spread my arms out widely, as though to embrace them. "I sold myself for these." Actually I promised Jeremy I'd help him with a paper if he supplied me with them. Same thing, though.

"Dear God, it begins." Bonnie shook her head, pretending to sound concerned. Pfft.

"Where did you get those?" Elena asked with a frown. "You're not allowed to have them."

I ripped open the first lunchable. Try and stop me, Elena. Seriously.

"Wow this takes me back." Matt said with a grin. "Lunchables? Really?"

"Just let her have what she wants," Caroline said as I began making the first pizza. What the hell is up with the lack of red stick? Now everyone gets pizza with my germs in it. "It's my birthday." Hell yeah, Caroline!

"How can you stand to eat that?" Tyler demanded as he plopped down between Bonnie and Elena, giving me a disgusted look. I knew he'd come. Bitch. "That crap is garbage."

"Hey, don't knock it til you try it. I'm never allowed to eat this." I pulled the first pizza out, grinning excitedly. "Now, I will eat all the lunchables."

"I've never had a lunchable before." Stefan said with a curious glance and I raised my eyebrows. He's lived a pitiful existence.

"That's kind of sad." Matt said good-naturedly, with a small laugh. "Not gonna lie."

"You're not missing much." Elena shook her head. Yes he was. Stefan is like that one kid with a deprived childhood. …And bloodlust.

"It's… a masterpiece." I whispered at the finished pizza. I placed it on the lunchable wrapper and slid it toward Stefan. "Eat up, I slaved for hours over a hot stove."

"Aw, don't make him eat that," Bonnie said, smiling sympathetically at Stefan who eyed the pizza with a large frown. "It might not agree with his stomach." If he can eat sad, defenseless, animals he can eat a lunchable.

"Don't pansy out, Salvatore." Tyler smirked. "Eat it. Clare _made _that for you, you'd be a real dick to not be grateful."

"Clare, I think you should make Tyler one too." Stefan said coolly and ooh, damn, okay. Macho men being macho. Over freakin' lunchables. You guys are so cool. _Not_.

"I have no idea why you guys are acting like it's the end of the world, it's only a friggin' lunchable." Caroline scoffed. "Make me one, Clare. _I _actually like them."

"Heeeell yeaaah."

My phone buzzed in my pocket and I set my pizza making skills down to flip my phone open. Damon: _pick a color_

Hmmm. _Black. It looks great with everything_, I texted back, setting my phone on the table and continuing to work on two pizzas. One for Tyler and one for Caroline.

"So what's the plan for your birthday, Caroline?" Matt asked curiously as my phone buzzed again. "Doing anything special?"

Damon: _pleeaaase, I'm the one that makes everything look great, not the other way around. I especially look great without anything on. ;)_

"Yeah, what's goin' on with that?" Tyler asked as I grinned down at the text, amused. Damon is such a little bastard. "I heard that party you were throwing got canceled."

I decided, fuck it, let's text Damon something crazy. _I'd drag my near dead body through a mile of glass just to see your left nipple_.

"Ugh! See! See!" Caroline threw her hands up. "I told you people were going to talk! I look like an ass!"

"It'll be _worth _it!" Elena laughed, she and Bonnie grinning at each other, as Stefan nibbled on the pizza I made for him. Bitch better eat it.

"Seriously, Care." Bonnie agreed and Caroline narrowed her eyes at us, suspiciously.

"Second pizza is finished! Who wants it?"

"Here," Tyler growled. "I'll try it."

Good boy.

Eat your damn pizza.

"Gonna make me one too, Clare?" Matt asked with a grin and I nodded just as my phone buzzed.

"Yup," I promised distractedly as I flipped open my phone, surprised to see I had a picture text from Damon. I opened it and nearly choked on my own spit. He _sent me a picture of his nipple_!

He ACTUALLY sent me a picture of his nipple! DAMON sent me a picture of his—I choked, flailing, making a strangled, giddy, shrieking noise. Oh my GOD, DAMON! Bonnie snatched the phone from my hand as I hacked on laughter, sinking so my head rested against the table. Oh my God.

"Why do you have a picture of… is this Damon's…? _Clare_?! What the hell?" Bonnie cried as my phone buzzed. "He says, you'll have to beg for the rest of me you filthy little—oh my god!"

"You're _sexting_?!" Caroline shrieked as my cheeks burst with heat. She ripped the phone away from Bonnie and I struggled to remember how to breathe as my throat clogged with laughter. I'm just going to die!

"No way!" Elena cried, looking floored as Stefan sent me such a bewildered look that it threw me into hysterical laughter. "_You_? Sexting? Oh my God! Oh my God!" A grin flew across her face.

"He's sent another text!" Caroline gushed. "He says… I'm laying glass out my kinky minx, pay up. …What?"

I was laughing so hard I couldn't see. "I'm—so done—I'm so fucking done!" I shrieked, tears of mirth forming as I slid down my seat, clutching my stomach. "I'm like eight hundred percent done with life! Oh my fucking God!" I couldn't stop laughing. "I told him—oh my God—I told him I'd drag… I'd drag…" I broke off, shrieking. "My dead body!"

"Whaaat?"

"Give me the phone," Matt snatched it from Caroline. "She said, I'd drag my near dead body through a mile of glass just to see your left nipple." I fell off my chair, cackling. "I hate to say this Clare, but I don't think you know how to sext."

"Clare, you are literally the only one who finds any of this funny." Bonnie let me know.

Vampire—nipple! Vampire—Damon—nipple! They couldn't _comprehend _the amount of hilarious this was! I grasped the end of the table, pulling myself up, but one look at Stefan's gawking face threw me back into a fit of laughter. I couldn't imagine what he was thinking! Oh no, Damon's seducing poor Clarissa with pictures of his _nipples_!

"This is Clare _without _any sugar in her system." Elena said after a few seconds went by in which I was just clinging to the table laughing. Stefan merely stared at me with an odd look on his face. I was calming down.

"I think you guys depriving her is just _cruel_." Matt shook his head. "Such a free spirit." Suddenly I was pretty sure I loved Matt.

"You mean wild unpredictable party monster." Bonnie snorted.

…But hey, weren't we missing an extra party goer?

"Where'd Tyler go?" At least he ate his pizza. …Or threw it away. He better not have!

"Left while you were rolling on the floor laughing," Caroline shrugged. "He's not bound to Elena and so can run away in horror." Matt threw her an annoyed look. But it was true. So very true.

* * *

English was boring as _ever_. Screw Beowulf. It was like two periods before the end of the day and I was getting really antsy. There was only one thing I could do to make the time more bearable. Harass Stefan. I tore a piece of paper out of my notebook and doodled a stick figure with a censor bar over where the privates would be and then drew an arrow next to it with the word _U_. I tossed the note onto his desk, which was across from mine. Stefan tilted his head down, looking at the piece of paper, and then raised his eyebrows, looking at me. I flashed him a grin.

To my surprise he scribbled something down and tossed it back at me. I smoothed out the paper to read: _yes because that doesn't make me feel less anxious about later_. Aw, you little loser.

I wrote back: _THAT'S NOT ANXIETY IT'S THE URGE TO KILL_ and then drew the stick figure holding a shovel with three dead stick figures laying around it. I folded the note and tossed it back to his desk.

Stefan shot me a look, and I was again surprised by the amusement on his face rather than annoyance. Or horror. Preferably horror. Where was my horror? He tossed the note back at me the _U _was crossed out and next to it said _DAMON_, the dead figures now had money in their hands and Stefan had written: _Damon is used to stripping, although I presume you already know such as he's very open and _honest _with you about everything_.

Oh.

My.

God.

Stefan, is this your attempts at vampire dickery? I quickly wrote down: _don't be slut shaming your brother, Steffy, he had to support your addiction somehow_.

Stefan flicked an eyebrow upward, his green eyes dancing. No, Stefan. You're supposed to be upset.

His reply: _You have to be kitten me, he told you about my cat video addiction? I confess, it's true. Please don't tell Elena, it's a conversation we haven't had yet_.

You have to be _kitten_ me? Oh, Stefan, you are so very, very, lame.

I'm sad to admit I laughed.

A tiny laugh.

Mostly because I pictured Stefan being vamped out, veiny eyed, and scrolling through youtube videos with blood all over his mouth going "yes, this is the one. Hits the spot so good. Look at the kittens! Yeeeees. Yeeeees."

* * *

Finally. School was _over_. I stuffed the useless books into my locker cheerfully and slammed the locker shut. Bouncing on my heels as I turned around I nearly ran smack into Tyler. Who was looking pissy. Why is he always so _pissed _off? …Maybe he was doing steroids. It would explain why he accidentally decked me in the face. No self-control and all rage monster.

"We need to talk." He said shortly, grabbing my wrist and pulling me further down the hall.

"Okay? What's up?" Translation: what did I do _now_? I wiggled my wrist from his hand, following after him.

Is it just me or is everyone really dramatic here? Maybe it's because originally they're all made for a dramatic teen TV show, and so it's just… programmed into their souls. Tyler pushed me into the corner of the hall, fixing his dark eyes on me like I had personally ruined his day. We are off to a beautiful start, can't wait to see what he wants to yell at me about!

"What the hell is going on?" He demanded. I stared back at him, lost. "I don't trust those Salvatore brothers. There's something… up with them, and I think you should stay away. I just… I just don't get it. What _happened_?"

I blinked in surprised. Damn he was fucking perceptive. "What are you talking about?" But I wasn't getting what had him all worked up.

"Is this some kind of self-destructive behavior?" He was giving me some freakin' sass, hands on his hips, like I was slicing my skin and running around Stefan giggling, tempting the beast. "I mean, that guy is a lot older than you. And he kind of comes off as a possessive dick. He starts coming around you and suddenly you have bruises on your neck? You think I don't notice? Are you asking him to hurt you?"

_Really_ perceptive. I half wondered if Stefan compelled him to corner me, but then at the same time that _was _the most logical thing to come to. I mean, it _was _true. Tyler was a real Sherlock Holmes!

I shrugged my shoulders, dismissively. I wasn't really up to having a serious, dramatic, conversation. It was Caroline's birthday, I wanted to make some vampires strip!

"Hey don't worry about it, I'm okay. I mean, not to be a bitch, but it's not _really _your business." Seriously. Tyler didn't even _like _me, where was this awkward concern coming from?

"You _made _it my business!" He snapped and glanced around us, backing me up further against the wall. He suddenly looked a lot more serious. "You made it my business, Clare," he continued quietly. "When I found you trying to jump off Wickery Bridge. You begged me not to say anything, and I haven't, but shit, if something happened and you ended up, you know, killing yourself, I'd feel… Like shit about it, okay?"

I stared back at him, stunned. Suddenly it seemed very clear as to why Tyler was hovering, why even though we appeared to have nothing in common or even get along he kept _showing _up. He felt _responsible_. A small smile crept across my face. That was actually kind of sweet.

"Thanks, Tyler." I said honestly. "It means a lot, really. You gonna beat up Stefan for me?"

"Not for _you_. I punched you in the face, you made me eat a pizza lunchable. We're _even_. Get someone else to beat up guys for you." Tyler scoffed, looking more at ease suddenly and back to his indifferent I-Don't-Care attitude that I knew was a total lie. Tyler was a good guy.

"We don't have to go to that dance together, you could take Vicki." I said lightly and Tyler groaned.

"My mother actually wants us to go together, so..."

Oh.

And now it's awkward again.

Let's make it more awkward! I threw my arms around Tyler's neck and he instantly went stiff.

"What the hell are you doing, Gilbert?" He snapped. "Get off me!" He likes it! He can't deny it! A hug from me is a sacred gift! "I'm serious!"

Laughing, I bounced back and pranced away from the furious rage monster. "Byeee Tyler!"

* * *

"Like, what the hell, who cares?" Caroline was saying with a flourish wave of her hand, sprawled out next to me on my bed. I nodded, despite the fact that I hadn't been listening for a good half of what she was going on about. "If that's what she wants to do, fine, but she doesn't have to wear it and be in my face at the same time!"

"Care, you can't _ban _people from wearing certain outfits." Bonnie said with a shake of her head as she came to sit in between me and Elena.

After birthday dinner (and cake that I was only allowed to have one piece of, like boo, everyone I know sucks give me the whole damn thing), we migrated to my room given my bed could comfortably fit all four of us. It was much later now and we were in PJs. Cute PJs.

"Whatever." Caroline huffed, looking annoyed. "So where is this amazing gift? I cancelled a _party _and the chance to make out with some cute guys for a slumber party? What are we, ten?"

"Yes." I confessed sadly and Caroline scoffed, shoving me off the bed. I hit the ground with a laugh just as there was a knock on the bedroom door. I sat up. "Oh I wonder who _that _can be," I said with a grin as I bounced to my feet. I threw open the bedroom door, uncaring as it loudly hit the wall.

Damon was leaning against the doorframe, his blue eyes smoldering, a smirk stretched across his face. He was dressed in a black button up while Stefan's (who was looking awkward) was white. Like they were doing the bad brother, good brother, thing. Losers.

"What the _hell_?" Caroline sounded annoyed, coming up to stand behind me. "Um. No. No boyfriends allowed, it's _my _birthday!"

"I know," I grinned at her, tugging Stefan and Damon into the room by the front of their shirts. I kicked my bedroom door shut. "Happy birthday, Caroline! Unwrap your presents!"

Bonnie and Elena were grinning widely as Caroline's mouth fell open with surprise, her blue eyes growing wide. "My…?"

"The Salvatore Package," I said happily, prancing away from her to grab my camera. Like hell I wasn't going to record the shit out of this! "Only the best for you!"

"Mmm, let us _worship_ you, Caroline," Damon purred, his voice low, suggestive. Caroline gaped at him in a state of dazed surprise.

Oh Damon.

You're too good at being sexy.

"Happy birthday, Caroline," Stefan murmured with a tiny smile.

Her blue eyes slid over to us. "Are you guys _serious_?" She asked as Bonnie set her MP3 player down on the bed, plugging it into portable speakers. House music pulsed out and I wasn't sure if I was about to cackle or get up and dance.

"Happy birthday!" Elena squealed, grinning widely.

"Come on, strip!" Bonnie demanded with a laugh. "Taaake it all off!"

Caroline looked delighted, turning around to face Damon whose grin turned filthy. He caught her hands. "Sorry, beautiful, we can touch _you_, but you can't touch _us_." He backed her toward the bed, gently pushing her down. Caroline plopped down next to me. "Come on, Stef, let's give the birthday girl what she _desires_."

Stefan, like a wounded animal, looked at Elena (who was grinning) and then hesitantly at Damon. I hit record on the camera as Stefan, sighing, slowly began unbuttoning his white button up. Damon shot him a smirk, and, hips swaying to the pulsing beating, tore his own button up open causing Bonnie, Caroline and _Elena _to squeal. I couldn't, for the life of me, keep my gaze from slowly sliding down his stupidly perfect bare torso. His jeans were so low I could see the top of his pelvic bone. Fuck my life.

"Oh my God!" Caroline giggled.

"Take it off!" Bonnie gushed.

Damon smirked, his blue eyes sliding to meet mine briefly, before his gaze locked with Stefan. Stefan narrowed his eyes, a challenging smirk sliding across his face. That's right, turn this into your eternal feud. Who can strip the best? Impress Elena! Go! Stefan moved to the music, pulling his shirt off completely, the buttons flying as he tossed his shirt at us. Elena was shrieking.

Just _oh my God_.

"Hell yeah, Stefan!" Caroline squealed. "Look at that hotness! Take more off!"

"Your wish is our command, Caroline," Stefan grinned as Damon threw aside his shirt and I was trying really hard to look at his face and not objectify that stupidly attractive body. Fuck vampires.

As if he could hear my fucking thoughts, Damon winked at me and my heart jumped as his began unbuckling his belt.

Oh.

Dear.

God.

Elena, Bonnie and Caroline were just screeching as Stefan and Damon continued to sway and dance. Damon slid his belt off slowly and tossed it, earning another ground of giggles and squeals. Both brothers slowly rocked out of their pants and I was just so freakin' done with my life because Damon in a pair of black briefs made every single thought leave my head. I don't even remember dropping the camera. I drank him in, shamelessly, unable to help myself. I didn't care, Damon turned me into a cliché, pitiful, hormonal mess that I never understood or even thought was _real_. He was stupidly _beautiful_, flawless, and I was overcome with a bizarre desire to throw myself at him. I have become a monster. A teenaged, hormonal, creature. God help me, I am the true creature of the night. A creature of darkness. A boy craving demon.

My breath hitched as I realized his blue eyes were locked on my face, a terrible, knowing, smirk twinkling across his face. "Help me get dressed, Clary?" His voice was playful and my cheeks warmed.

Oh you little bastard.

Caroline playfully shoved me. "Help him!" She laughed as I, dazed, stood up. I guess the stripping was done. Well—unless they got naked, there wasn't much else they could do… And I wouldn't survive a naked Damon in my room.

"If you want we can go get ice cream and you can lick it off his body!" Bonnie added and I nearly tripped on my own two feet, my face exploding into heat as a vivid image of—of… oh God, licking sugar off his stupidly disgustingly hot body, fuck my life!

"I think you've killed her, Bon!" Elena burst into giggles. "The idea of sugar and Damon is too much for her to handle!"

"Guys!" I hissed. I mean Jesus Christ, he was standing right there! And he didn't need any more reasons to be cocky! I turned around only to realize Damon was lazily leaning into my space, his pants were on but he was shirtless and his gaze was mischievous.

"We probably shouldn't have ripped the shirts off," Stefan was saying somewhere behind me and I wondered how I could forget he was even there. All I could see was Damon. My heart hummed in my chest.

"Oh, um, maybe Jer has some you can borrow…" Elena said as Damon trapped me in his blue gaze. Oh hell. "Let's go… find you a shirt…"

"What did you think of our little show?" Damon's voice was low and God help me if I could think correctly. I blinked, dazed. "Was it… Good enough? Have I _pleased _you?" My stomach flipped.

"Stop doing that," I whined, annoyed that he was taking advantage of my poor fragile state of being. I swatted his bare chest and sprang backwards as a jolt went through me. "This should be illegal!" Oh God, I didn't mean to say that out loud! Damon _laughed_. My gaze dropped, trailing down his chest slowly. Oh my God. Why was he so _hot_? How was this possible?

"Say the word, little Clarissa, and you can _have _me." Damon teased, clearly enjoying this horrible, horrible, moment. A flash went off and I blinked, turning toward a smirking Caroline who was holding up my camera.

I realized it was only us three in the room. "Where did everyone go?" I wondered, stepping away from Damon, trying to regain some damn dignity.

"Stefan and Elena are making out in the hallway, Bonnie went to go get chocolate syrup to pour on Damon for you." Caroline shrugged and I choked. These are the worst friends _ever_! "Thanks for the strip show. It was amazing."

Damon tilted his head and smiled charmingly at her. "Of course. The Salvatore brothers aim to please. Mm, Clary also informs me you have no date for the Founder's Park Dance? I would be delighted to escort you there, if you'd have me." Damon's voice was smooth and rich, filled to the brim with charm. His blue eyes gleaming with his usual mischievousness.

Him standing there, shirtless, smiling all charmingly with his stupid face and his stupid blue eyes—honest to God, if he asked me to forsake everything and go on a killing spree with him, I would probably find myself agreeing before I even realized what I was agreeing to. Damon knew how to work it, and he knew how to abuse his attractiveness.

What the _hell _is wrong with me?

Oh, that's right. Hormones.

Which were making me really dumb. And weird. And overly, stupidly, girly.

"_Clare_!" Caroline's voice cut through my thoughts and I realized I had been blankly staring at Damon's chest. I puffed my now hot cheeks out, shot the _extremely smug _vampire an annoyed look, and turned to Caroline. She was smirking too. Fuck everybody. "I asked if that would be _okay _with you."

I grinned. "Hell yeah it'll be okay. Damon coming will spice everything up." And he was cooking some crazy scheme, one that I hoped he'd let me in on. "It'll be a _blast_."

Caroline looked a little surprised and then pleased. She smiled. "Great! We'll exchange numbers."

I frown at the odd little twinge inside my chest. _This _was new. I… I didn't _want _Caroline to have his number. I liked being the only one to interact with Damon. …And I didn't want anyone else to be in on his vampire dickery. Which was just ridiculous. I was being ridiculous. There was also a tiny spasm of guilt that rode up with the twinge. I wasn't… handing Caroline over for Damon to turn into his compelled bitch, was I…?

"Walk me to the door, Clary," Damon's voice was in my ear pulling me from my thoughts. He was hovering next to me and tilted his gaze toward Caroline. "Until I see you again, Blondie. Happy birthday." He winked at her and she smiled back.

"If you don't return in five minutes, I'm gonna assume you're getting your freak on in the middle of the living room." Caroline said with a sweet smile and I had a terrible feeling I knew what the rest of the night was going to consist of. Damon talk. Nooooo.

"You won't have to assume," Damon purred, his fingers drifting over my shoulder and he guided me from the room. "We'll be _loud_."

He pushed me from the room before I had a chance to say anything, Caroline's laughter following me out. Sure enough, Stefan was eating Elena's face in the corner of the hall. Gross!

* * *

"Don't you want a shirt?" Clarissa murmured, her thoughtful gray-blue eyes peering up at him. Like _hell _Damon was going to cover up, he was enjoying how the tiny human sputtered and trip over herself. And as much as it amused him, it also boosted his ego, leaving him feeling comfortably smug and satisfied.

Damon's lips curved into a wolfish grin and he squinted his eyes at her. "Worried about all the women who won't be able to resist my _Sex God _appearance, Claryberry?" His teasing caused her mouth to tug upward into a grin, amusement dancing across her previously serious face.

"Your heathen Gods have made you powerful through sex appeal." She deadpanned, and Damon's teasing grin flitted into a haughty smirk.

"With all that screaming, I thought you guys were being horribly murdered," Pretend Brother's voice cut between them, immediately stealing Clarissa's attention which Damon found a bit irritating. He easily caught the shirt that was tossed to him, Clarissa's lips springing into a wide grin.

"Oh God, imagine? Way to not come to our rescue." Clarissa was clearly amused and Damon had no doubt she was imagining the strip show going very differently and being very violent. He snorted. Happy birthday, everybody dies!

"Are you kidding? You die and I get your rooms." Pretend Brother scoffed earning an affectionate grin from Clarissa. "I have plans for them. Large plans."

"Hmm, maybe something can be arranged," Damon knew that Pretend Brother didn't like him, he could see it written across his body language and the way his eyes would narrow.

It amused him that because _he _was labeled the blue canary, Clarissa's pretend brother attempted to act friendly. He obviously got the lingering threat under Damon's tease. Speaking of the whole blue canary thing, he couldn't help but notice Clarissa's entire house was literally filled with nightlights. Briefly he wondered if she was making a bold statement ("you're the blue canary whether you want to be or not!") but he figured Clarissa was just obsessive given her tendency to always have some sort of Minnie Mouse on her.

Damon grinned, and tilted his head toward the staircase. "Steeeef! Stop eating your girlfriend and let's _goooo_!" He enjoyed tormenting Stefan, he truly did. He especially liked to embarrass him in front of others. Amused, Damon turned his head back to Clarissa.

"Night, D. Thanks for stripping." She grinned widely at him and he hesitated, his thoughts flickering back toward when Caroline had suggested they swamp numbers. A _look _had passed across her face and, with a quick glance back toward the stairway, he gently pulled her outside with him.

For a moment darkness crept around them until the porch light flickered on. She hugged herself, shivering. He figured it was probably chilly out, especially with her just in a tank top and tiny sleeping shorts. Damon moved closer to her almost unthinkingly, wrapping her pretend brother's shirt around her arms. It was big enough that it almost acted as a blanket and she offered a faint amused grin. Damon's gaze slowly drifted across her face.

"You had this look on your face when Caroline and I decided to swamp numbers," it just suddenly came blurting out and Damon felt a spasm of startled surprise rush through him. Clarissa mirrored his expression and they stood frozen, staring at each other with surprised looks.

He had _no reason _to explain himself to her! He shouldn't feel the urge to! He could do whatever he wanted—besides, it was _Clarissa_'s idea to begin with! Damon squinted his blue eyes and hastily threw a haughty smirk across his face. He leaned closer, immediately acting flirty to defuse what he had just done.

"…Don't worry Claryberry, you are the only light that leads me through this terrible darkness."

Her laughter rang like a relieved sigh through him, though it hadn't been the response he wanted (he kind of wanted to see her face turn red, her heart skip, and for her to sputter). He relaxed, feeling more at ease.

"Oh Damon," she grinned, almost affectionately, eyes dancing with amusement. "I'm just one of the many candles that lights your path." She gently patted his arm as though to reassure him and Damon found he could only stare at her. "S'fine," she shifted her shoulders upward into a tiny shrug. "I got a little… pouty, but whatever, I know you need to be at that party," her gaze tilted into a knowing look. "And this way you'll be there to rock out with us, so it all works out in the end."

Light poured between them as the door opened, again stealing Clarissa's attention away from him. She turned to look at Stefan, but Damon opted to watching her instead. After all, between the two, he'd much rather look at Clarissa than Stefan.

"You should go inside, Clare, you'll catch a cold." Saintly Concerned Stefan in the works. Miffed irritation slid across her gaze, though Damon couldn't blame her. Stefan was suffocating.

"The heat from Damon's love keeps me toasty warm," she stated coolly and turned, her blue-gray eyes suddenly playful. "Among other things…" mischief danced across her gaze and Damon could not look away, pulled into those damned eyes of hers. Her soft fingertips drummed across his chest, his skin tingling hotly where hers touched. A hiss of hunger sliced through him as Clarissa's fingers slid down his torso in a _very _suggestive fashion. "Sext you later, honeybunny."

With a _wink_, Clarissa sauntered back into her house and Damon's gaze tilted downward, watching the way her hips swayed as she walked. With slight surprise, Damon realized he was _checking her out_. When the hell did this happen? …Did she just say _sext_? Damon blinked, yet again left in a baffled (and now slightly turned on) state. His gaze turned to Stefan who was _staring _at him with those annoying judgmental—wait was that fucking _amusement_? Damon narrowed his eyes into slits, darkly staring back at his brother, _daring _him to say something.

"_Mother fucking shithead_!" Damon heard Clarissa swear from inside her house, his lips springing into a cocky smirk. "_Ugh! Ugh! Damn it! …Oooh, is that ice cream?_"

Idiot.

And Damon thought that _fondly_.

As fondly as he could, anyway.

Stefan tilted his head toward the car. "Mind if I join you?"

"Ooh brotherly bonding?" Damon asked with sarcastic glee, rolling his eyes and turning toward his car. "This night just keeps getting better and better!"

Stefan sat awkwardly stiff in the passenger seat and silence crept around them for a bit. Damon was well aware Stefan was just _dying _to say something, he was basically screaming it from his awkward side glances he kept throwing in Damon's direction and the way he'd clench his jaw. Stefan was always so _easy _to read.

"Nothing like two shirtless brothers enjoying each other's company," Damon deadpanned sarcastically. "Just FYI—that's _for your information_—I don't support…" what had Clarissa said it was called? "Defan. So if that's your sick intent, cast it from your thoughts, Stefan. _Honestly_."

Stefan's bewildered look was enough to ease Damon out of his snarky mood. "What?"

"Ask Clary," Damon said dismissively, a secretive smirk sliding across his face. "Now what is it that you're _dying _to say, little brother?" What would come out of Stefan's mouth? Stay away from Clarissa? Stay away from Clarissa _and _her little friends? What are his _intentions_—like he'd ever have to answer to _Stefan_ about that!

"We could make it a career; the Salvatore Brothers," Stefan said lightly and Damon turned to look at his brother fully. "Show up at teenage girls birthday parties, dance around for a bit…"

What the _hell _was Stefan up to? What the hell was this?

"Oh? We're not going to talk about Clary, then?" Damon narrowed his eyes, suspicious. He didn't like it when his brother tried to act sneaky. Stefan raised his eyebrows with faux innocents.

"Clare? Well, if you want to talk about her, we can," Stefan said with mocking indifference, and Damon growled. Fucking damn it, Stefan. "I noticed she's becoming more friendly with that kid who punched her…" Was Stefan trying to annoy him? Evoke a reaction? It wasn't happening. "…Though I shouldn't be surprised, she seems to be drawn to those who like to _hurt_ her."

A flash of hot white anger pierced through him. Damon slammed on his brakes furiously causing Stefan to smack his face on the dashboard. The younger Salvatore hissed in pain, angrily lifting his head, green eyes flashing. He was _glad_, he wanted to hurt Stefan more for _stupidly _implying anything. It _pissed _Damon off, for reasons he refused to acknowledge, to be confronted with the fact that he _had _hurt her. He didn't _really_ hurt her though—he just killed her. It was different. And she _asked _him to! He never put his hands on her in any other kind of harmful way!

"I thought I saw a deer," Damon sneered as they locked in a glare. He threw his younger brother a feral grin. "Should've worn your seatbelt, safety means _so much_ to me!"

"She deserves better and you know it." Stefan said coolly.

Damon wanted to tackle Stefan out of the car and beat him senselessly on the side of the road. He wanted to snap at him, tell him how _misinformed _he was. Clarissa _needed _him! Clarissa _relied _on him! He kept her secrets, he knew the _real _Clarissa, not the one everyone thought she was! But he couldn't say any of that to Stefan. Clarissa didn't want _Stefan _to know, and Damon would keep it in. He settled for punching his brother in the face as hard as he could. Stefan nearly swore, his nose cracking. _Good_.

"You're an idiot." Damon decided he wasn't going to play into whatever stupid game Stefan was trying to pull him into. "Don't get any fucking blood on my seats."

"You just punched me!" Stefan sounded shocked, green eyes wide, fangs out. Damon shifted a shoulder upward and decided to reply in a very Clarissa manner.

"Suck it, Steffy."

Unbeknownst to Damon, Stefan's mouth was curving into a grin, green eyes lit with relieved happiness.

* * *

I call bullshit on the entire system. Bullshit for everybody. Apparently we (meaning, Elena, Jeremy and I) had a card with allowance spending money on it, but _I _wasn't allowed to have access to it. Elena gave the card to Caroline to hold onto while we went to the mall to shop for dresses and that was just unfair. Like, okay, so I could be a little impulsive sometimes but that didn't mean I couldn't be trusted! Elena needed to chill out, like she was smothering me and Stefan was starting to follow after her. Like what the fuck was that about last night? Get inside before you get a cold? Does it look like I need Stefan and Elena to play Mom and Dad? No. Goddamn.

"Can we talk about Damon _now_?" Caroline asked with a pointed look and I made a pathetic noise, sinking in the passenger seat, my cheeks warm.

I had outright refused to talk about anything Salvatore related last night claiming the night should be focused on Caroline. I was actually a little surprised how disappointed it made the other three girls.

"He looked like he wanted to _eat _you." Caroline decided to forsake me and talk about it. Yeah I bet Damon did want to, and not in the way Caroline was hoping. "And I've never seen you get that way with a guy before! The sexual tension between you two was like O-M-G!"

"Sexual tension?" Is _that _what this was? Dear God, I finally know what the hell is wrong with me! "How do I get rid of it?"

"By screwing him senselessly every chance you get." Caroline said wisely and I moaned miserably.

"I'm serious, Care! I feel like I'm going to _die_!" I whined. "That's totally not happening. Not. Ever."

"You don't even _want _a relationship!" Caroline said with a frown, pulling into the mall parking lot. "Like no joke, just go with it. I get that stuff means a lot to you, but what are the chances you're going to be attracted to someone again—_and _have him be hotter than Damon Salvatore? That guys practically oozes sex and he _wants _you!"

I swung her car door shut a lot harder than I probably should've and linked arms with her. "No way, he sold his soul to the devil," I shook my head. Damon was going to bring a path of destruction and death with him, just like in Faust, and there was no way in hell I was going to set myself up for any more pain in life. "I won't be able to separate sex and the feels, Care. And Damon is a total heartbreaker." And a vampire who (despite being a blue canary at times) wanted nothing to do with his humanity.

I could play friends, but it couldn't go past there otherwise I might as well get a stopwatch to start the countdown to misery and all that junk. …That, and, all I had left were my virtues. That was the only thing I really owned here. Everything else was just kind of borrowed. I slid my phone out, deciding to bitch at Damon, as this was all his fault.

"Ugh. You suck." Caroline huffed, pulling me into Deb. "If he makes a move on me, don't hate me if I jump at the chance."

I bit back a _be careful_. "Just don't let him hurt you," I settled with, feeling awkwardly torn between wanting to protect Caroline from possible vampire dickery, and being friends with Damon and supporting vampire dickery. What the shit. I sent Damon a text whining about shopping for dresses. I decided not to talk about the doomed sexual tension.

Suck it, Damon.

"Puh-leaze, I'm not looking for anything _serious_," Caroline said cheerfully, gravitating toward sparkly looking dresses. "And if you're not going to go after him, then he's up for grabs."

Caroline ended up not liking any of the dresses in Deb, while I found the perfect dress. She had tried to convince me to check all the stores first but upon seeing it on me, she agreed it was the one. The dress was simple, sophisticated yet had a swing of style that matched my personality. It was black, with spaghetti straps. The black dress fell a few inches above my knees, and had a second layer of lace that started from the waist and dipped down to my knees in the front, wrapping around and hanging just above my ankles in back. It was classy and cute. It would be sending the appropriate message to Tyler's mother too. Like I'm a respectable young lady, but I clearly have no interest in her son but I'm deeply flattered to be seen with him.

Manners were important and despite my total disregard to live remotely like how I did in my past life, it made no sense to burn all the bridges. The Lockwoods might be important later on and I should have a decent relationship. Just in case. Ugh, I'm so brainwashed. Caroline was a real pal, she let me get a bottle of Pepsi.

Probably so I wouldn't complain about getting bored.

My phone buzzed and I flipped it open to see a text from Damon: _wearing black for everything is a real New Yorker thing_

Well duh.

_Can't help it. Plus I look hella good in black_, I texted back.

"That one looks good," I said, nodding to the pretty knee length yellow dress that Caroline kept returning to. She held it to herself with her eyebrows raised. "It'll compliment you nicely, and it'll bring out your sunny personality." I paused and grinned. "And your boobs."

She rolled her eyes and grinned. "Lemme try it on real quick." She placed her _maybe _dresses up against the rack and moved toward the dressing rooms.

A sharp tug turned my attention away from the dressing room and I whirled around. Damon was rolling a strand of my hair between two fingers, grinning teasingly at me. I didn't even realize I wanted to see him until he was _here_ and a rush of excitement flooded me.

"Ouch. Dick." I pulled my hair back, unable to keep the smile from exploding across my face. "What's up, D?"

"I'm _bored_." He whined, doing a fabulous job of looking pouty.

"So you decided to come to the mall to tag along with two teenagers shopping for dresses?" Sound reasoning. Damon rolled his eyes and snatched the Pepsi bottle from my hands. "Hey!"

"I can make any experience fun, Claryberry." He said, unscrewing the top and bringing it to his lips. He was drinking _my _Pepsi! And he was taking large gulps!

"HA! We're indirectly kissing now!" That's right! Be repelled! Spit my drink out! Return my Pepsi!

Damon's blue eyes locked with mine and he tilted the bottle upward, slowly drinking. My cheeks instantly became warm, my heart hammering in my chest. No you stupid bastard, you're doing it all freakin' wrong!

"Stop it!" I hissed, smacking his arm. "Stop stealing kisses! Those aren't for you!" His blue eyes gleamed wickedly and he was suddenly inches from me. I sucked in a breath at the sudden closeness, his body warm against mine, as he pressed the Pepsi bottle to my lips.

"Kiss me back, Clary," Damon commanded lowly, a roguish smirk flitting across his stupidly handsome face. My heart twitched. Welcome to sexual tension with Damon 101. This was my life now. "Don't be _rude_. Take me in your mouth."

God.

Help.

Me.

Cheeks burning, I stared at him with wide eyes. Damon's gaze was so consuming, so blue, I almost felt dizzy. His smirk stretched wider. What a bitch.

I smacked the bottle from his hand and it went flying, hitting the ground with a bounce and pouring out. I grinned, prodding his chest with a finger, trying to shake the nerves that he had jolted through me.

"Ha-ha," I purposely stepped into the soda. "Kissing my feet as you should be, you lowly peasant!"

"Now you'll never get any of my kisses," Damon said as though I had deeply wounded him. "If that's how you're going to treat them! They were special and _all _for you. But never again! You teasing harlot!" Drama queen!

"Let's hide from Caroline!" I grabbed his hand before he could deny me, and I was delighted when he let me pull him. "We'll be the phantoms of the dress section!" The sugar from the Pepsi (that I didn't get to fully enjoy) was hitting me and I was bouncing a little bit more than usual, feeling suddenly ecstatic. I felt like I could do or say _anything _around Damon!

"_Clare_?" I heard Caroline call, sounding unsure and I gasped dramatically, yanking Damon forward.

"Hide!" I whispered, shoving him backwards into a rack of dresses. He made a noise, rolled his eyes at me, and ducked down, hiding out of view.

"Were you talking to someone?" Caroline questioned with a curious glance around us as she approached me wearing the pretty yellow dress.

"Just the Angel of the Dress Department," I answered solemnly and she narrowed her blue eyes at me.

"I think you've had enough sugar," she said and I felt a stab of betrayal! But why! I was hardly hyper! "How does this dress look? Does it say, I'm open for no strings attached sex but without coming off as too obvious or desperate?" I grinned guilty at her.

Damon popped up from behind the dresses suddenly and Caroline shrieked, flailing backwards in surprise. "Flattering child you shall knooooow me, see why in shadow I hiiiiide!" He was no Michael Crawford, but he was a damn good Phantom. His voice was soft, dark, and terribly seductive.

"Angeeel of the Dress Department, guuuide and guardiaaaan! Grant to me your gloooooooory! Angel of the Dress Department, hide no longer! Come to me, strange Angel!" I sang back giddily and Damon slid in front of me, grabbing my hands and twirling me around. He dipped me lowly to the ground and I burst into a fit of laughter.

"Why didn't you tell me Damon was here?" Caroline demanded, putting her hands on her hips, her cheeks pink. I hit the ground, given that Damon carelessly dropped me. He stepped over me as I moaned in pain. My poor butt. I was always landing so hard on it. Damon is such a _dick_.

"My deepest, sincerest, apologizes, Caroline," Damon cooed, grasping her hands. "I just showed up two minutes ago."

Caroline didn't swoon like I thought she would. I probably would've swooned. Instead she quirked a single eyebrow, pulled her hands from his, and gave him a sassy look. "Uh huh. You think I'm going to buy that? Lose the charm, pretty boy. I'm on to you." Go Caroline! She's so much stronger than I am. I am pathetic when it comes to Damon. _Pathetic._

"Oooh, shut doooown," I called from the floor with a large grin. "Will Damon recover from that? The world may never know."

"What gave me away?" Damon asked, standing up straight, looking amused. "Am I simply too _devilishly sexy _to be a prince charming?"

"I'm not telling you my secrets." Caroline scoffed, smirking. "Now how do I look?" Damon stepped back and looked her up and down as I stumbled to my feet.

"I don't like it." Damon said after a moment. "Yellow is not for you."

"Yellow _is _for Care," I disagreed. "I think she looks fab."

"Pick something else." Damon ignored me and Caroline snorted.

"Um, one, I'm the one with the vagina, so _I'll _be making the decisions. And two, I'm the one inviting _you_, so you have no say what I wear to the dance. You can only approve of it and be thankful I'm taking you." Caroline said in a matter-of-fact way and I grinned. Hell yeah. The woman power is fierce with her.

I froze the moment Damon's smile turned sarcastic. He tilted his head, blue eyes flashing, his expression condescending. "You're not going to wear that dress, or any yellow dress."

Caroline stared at him and then suddenly brightened. "On second thought, I'm not really feeling this color. Be right back!" She flashed us a smile and turned on her heels.

Guilt hit me hotly, and I swallowed. Was this the start of it? Damon's blue eyes were on me suddenly. "Well…?" He drawled lowly. I stared back at him, the guilt rising as a little cruel smile flickered to life across his face. "Are you going to _yell _at me, Clarissa? I know how _protective _you are of these people who love that body you've stolen…" his voice was chilling and I hadn't realized he was backing me into a corner until my back hit a wall. His voice was dark and soft, but he could have been yelling with the way they slapped across me.

I wasn't sure why he was suddenly like this, and his words hurt more than I could ever anticipate. Because, I realized dimly, he knew where to hit. But I was an Everett, damn it. I could handle this. I just had to figure out what was causing this mood swing. Was he daring me to… challenge him? But why?

"And what would you do if I decided to… _play _with Caroline?" Damon continued with his terrible smile and his terrible, dark, voice. "I _so love _to feed off the girls I fuck. It'd be an easy little compulsion to keep her in line." My heart stammered loudly in my chest. "Will you ask me to _forsake _who I am then, Clarissa? Now that it's someone you actually give a damn about, would you demand that I change myself? Hmm?"

"Why," I whispered, shaking with conflicting emotions, hardly hearing myself over my pounding heart. "Are you even bothering to ask when you know damn well how I feel? Why are you trying to prove to me you don't care? That you have no humanity? I already know and you already know how I feel about compelling people. Why are you asking me, why does it matter? You'll do what you do, I know even if I asked I couldn't change your mind."

He tilted his head, confusion stirring across his previously cruel expression. "There's that _look_, you keep wearing that look."

"Guilt, I feel guilt, it's always guilt." My voice cracked as the tears came. They stung, spilling and burning down my cheeks. Damon jerked back from me. "They've been so nice to me, and I would pick you anyway. I'm a terrible friend." I was feeling terrible. It was _true_, if it came down to it, I would pick Damon. Some shitty friend I was.

"Don't get all Stefan on me, Clary," Damon said quickly, his expression twisting oddly. "Angst ridden, self-loathing, guilty is his thing, not yours! You're doing it all wrong, you should get mad at _me_, not get guilty over something you can't control!"

"Then don't be an asshole at me while I'm in between sugar intakes you dick!" I sniffled back, frustrated, waving my hands over my face trying to cool down my cheeks and stop my crying. "Look at me, I'm Damon, I like to force girls to throw their Pepsi on the floor and then threaten to abuse their friends! Ha-ha!"

Damon gaped, his blue eyes widening almost comically. "You _threw _the drink!"

"You made it sexual!"

"You made it sexual first!"

"I'm an innocent twen—seventeen year old all about true love, you're a murderous hundred year old vampire who is pure evilness!"

"Careful Clary, don't slip up and reveal you're a body snatcher!"

"Careful Damon, you're wearing your humanity!"

Damon gasped as if I had struck him. "You _bitch_."

"Okay," Caroline's voice cut between us. I turned, finding her in a blue dress. "How about—oh my God, Clare, what's wrong?" She easily came between Damon and I, pulling me into a hug. "Why are you crying?"

"I… was just…" I floundered, feeling awkward. "You know… thinking about… how things were before—it's okay, it was a two second thing, I'm okay…" I glanced at Damon but he merely lifted a shoulder upward.

Caroline pulled back, her expression sympathetic. "I'll get you another soda, okay? You're doing really great." I brightened at the prospect of more sugar. She stepped back. "Well? How does this one look?" Her expression became demanding and she glanced between us. Damon sighed as if physically pained.

"Forget what I said before. Wear whatever you want."

Surprise snapped through me as an odd look crossed Caroline's face. She looked down at the dress she was wearing. "Hmm… Hold on, I need to see something." She murmured, turning back around.

I tried to bite back the grin as Damon rolled his eyes. "Do _not _get used to that. I'm still going to do it to everyone else."

Yeah, but I can't feel guilty about those people, because they aren't my friends who trust and love me. A large smile slid across my face and Damon's lips twitched. He was fighting the grin!

"So about you suddenly becoming dickish for no reason, what's up with that." Like I was gonna let that _go_. Damon groaned.

"Vampire Dickery reasons, Clary." He said indifferently. "I should just give up trying to scare you, you're a freak with too many whiney issues that makes you respond stupidly."

"Damon, you need to accept my friendship feels for you, man." I told him seriously, tapping my chest. "Yous in here deep man. Yous in here deep." He shot me an odd look that caused me to burst into laughter. Oh Damon. I really think the one who should be running is him, not me. Between us, I think I'll scare him off first.


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything! Not even Clarissa!

GAH! Guys! I am SO sorry! Things happened, funeral, death, ect. I'm actually supposed to be running out there door right now, but I REALLY wanted to get this out for you all! I made it bit longer to make up for not having a chapter out last week, and maybe I'll be able to update in the next few days ;D  
Literally zero time to do much else, so THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL THE REVIEWS! YOU GUYS ARE AMAAAZING! I hope you still like my story!

* * *

It's a warm Saturday, the year 1864. Those passing outside the Lockwood estate can hear the sweet melody of music trickling through the open doors. It's a wonderful evening, filled with hope and possibility in which the party goers can forget the outside world and the ongoing war. Scoffing, Damon bit back a sneer. He downed his entire glass as he watched _Stefan _put his stupid hands all over Katherine, stumbling around the dance floor like a complete fool. Between the two of them, Damon was the much better dancer. He wasn't sure how Stefan managed to convince Katherine into allowing him to escort her. He probably whined and nagged her all day.

"Aw, pouting doesn't suit you, D."

Damon jumped and turned around, finding—_Clarissa_? She was grinning up at him, her black hair in bouncy ringlets, donned in a silvery dress. He blinked, half wondering if he had too much to drink.

"Miss Clarissa?" He murmured, a little awestruck by her appearance. He furrowed his brows. "Goodness, what are you doing here?"

Amusement danced across her face and she snorted. "_Miss _Clarissa? Holy hell, why are you talking like that? Jeez, D. Never mind me, what are _you _doing here?"

"It's the Founder's party," Damon explained lightly, his gaze sliding back toward Katherine laughing in Stefan's arms. His mood darkened. "It's a nightmare."

"Yeah seriously, look at how you're _dressed_." Clarissa teased turning his attention back to her. Damon frowned and she laughed. "Aw, I'm kidding. You're sexy as hell, I promise. I like how you have your hair. You're sophisticated! So I'm guessing this is why I'm dressed weirdly, huh? I'm surprised you have me wearing anything at all." He stared at her in shock and she grinned widely. "This is where you do your little smirk and say some sarcastic, dirty, remark."

"I would never be so crass to speak in such a way in front of a lady," Damon hurriedly insisted, glancing around for another glass. He just wanted to sulk and Clarissa was her usual _bothersome _self. "I am in no mood for your queer behavior, Miss Clarissa. I mean no disrespect, but perhaps you should find whoever escorted you here? I am sure he is dying to have a dance with you."

"Pfft, you're the one who wants me here." Clarissa said dismissively, her arm sliding through his. He shifted, making it appear that he offered his arm rather than her grabbing it. "Dance with me, Damon," and he found that when she spoke his name in such a way, he could not refuse her, though he very much wanted to. Of course he couldn't _actually _deny her, Clarissa came from an upstanding family and Damon was taught to be courteous. "You really don't know how to go about this love triangle business. Let's make Katherine _jealous_!"

"She has nothing to be jealous of, I am hers entirely, both body and soul." Damon said automatically with a frown, uncomfortably turning his gaze toward Katherine. He didn't want to offend her by dancing with another.

"Don't be so desperate, she'll play into that. But if she sees you with another woman, mmm, that'll really throw her. It'll make her crave your attention! Trust me, I went to high school, I know how these things work." Clarissa's eyes were glowing with mischief and Damon let her pull him into the center of the dance floor.

Sighing, having no choice but to oblige Clarissa's demanding whims, Damon inclined his head in a small bow which seemed to amuse her even more. He bit back a growl, lightly sliding his hand over her back, taking her hand in his other.

"Okay what the hell kind of dance is this?" Clarissa asked with a laugh, hopping with him and Damon couldn't hold back the eye roll.

"It is called _the polka_." He muttered as they passed an oblivious Katherine and Stefan. Anger churned hotly inside his stomach and he felt physically sick.

"Oh _Damon_, that's _hilarious_!" Clarissa suddenly said loudly, eyes on the couple. Damon snapped his head toward her, his lips pursing to keep from telling her to shut her mouth. "_HA_!" She turned her grinning face back to him. "Now we loudly spread rumors."

"I will have no part in your scandalous ways," Damon said quietly. "I need not gossip!"

"What's that you say? Stefan is a _homosexual_?" Clarissa's eyes widened innocently and Damon repeatedly told himself not to find her idiocy amusing. "Stefan likes giant meaty guys to take him behind the barn? Oh, Damon, I never knew! Stefan is a _witch_? He practices witchcraft? Burn the witch! Burn the nonbeliever! Stefan is an atheist homosexual witch!"

"_Miss Clarissa_," Damon glanced around them. "You've had your laugh, now please. Let us just finish this dance!" They were swirling around Stefan and Katherine now, both who had noticed them. Damon instantly felt guilty as Katherine's beautiful lips fell into a frown.

"Hey Steffy," Clarissa called to his younger brother. "You're a loser! Katherine, you've picked the loserly brother, look at him!" Despite himself, Damon was slightly warmed by her declaration. "How can you look at anyone other than Damon? He's amazing!"

It wounded him deeply to see the both of them promptly _ignore _him. Clarissa's gray-blue eyes flashed.

"I'm gonna say something to them," she growled and Damon, surprised, tightened his hold on her. She turned her angry eyes to him, her protectiveness shocking him. "They don't get to do this to you, Damon, you don't deserve this! I'm gonna beat the shit out of Stefan and then I'm gonna give Katherine a piece of my mind! You're amazing, there should be only you in her heart and room for nothing else. And Stefan is a real fucking prick to do this to his _own _brother! You need to _wake up_ and realize Katherine isn't worth one _ounce _of the love you give her!"

"Clary…" Damon's lips curved into a smirk, fondness for her suddenly filling him. "You look stupid in this dress."

"It's _your _dream," she said with a shrug of her shoulders, a mischievous smile on her pretty face. "Let's fuck shit up, D."

His grin widened and he twirled her dramatically away. With a gentle tug on her hand, Damon had her spinning back into his chest, the 1860's styled gown flaring out and turning into a knee length black dress. She laughed delightedly, smiling at him brightly and Damon decidedly stopped giving a damn that Stefan was making a fool of himself in front of Katherine, that he had a status to uphold, or even what his _father _thought of him. All that mattered was the fact that Clarissa was _here_ and they could do whatever they wanted!

* * *

Eighteen days in, and I wondered if this was going to outline the rest of my life here. Was I going to keep on counting, or was I just eventually going to see it as _another new day _instead of _another new Vampire Diaries _day? It was the Founder's party tonight and I had been a busy little bastard over the last few days.

On Tuesday I had managed to get Jeremy to ask Vicki to go to the party with him after she realized Tyler was taking _me_. That ensured Vicki-Tyler-Jeremy fun. I know. Dick move. I was torn between wanting Jeremy to just kick Vicki to the curve (love triangles are so 1864) and giving him an edge to one up Tyler. I mean maybe Vicki will see what a catch my broski is and finally, I dunno, stop bouncing between them… I'm also a sucker for stirring up drama. Bad, rotten, Clarissa! Bad!

On Wednesday, I convinced Bonnie and Matt to go to the party together as _friends_ since Bonnie didn't want to go alone and Matt still had the hardcore Elena feels. I know, I'm a real _bitch_ this week. Yesterday I 'let slip' to Caroline that Stefan had a really bad drinking problem (WITH BLOOD) and had serious issues with addiction that made him a real freakin' asshole. Stefan has to be the one to tell Elena, I assured her was the reason I had yet to say anything. But I knew she was going to tell at least _Bonnie_, who would tell Elena. Best friend duties, and all that. I also found out that Damon could control animals. Hence the crow. Which seemed to be following me around lately. Kind of cool, not gonna lie. Damon got a mountain lion to attack a hunter (and I announced that Damon and I had been right about Aslan this entire time, but nobody found it funny like I did).

"I just can't believe you're going with that asshole," Jeremy said, leafing through one of the comics while sitting on my bed. We were having a designated brother-sister bonding time. I glanced at his reflection in the mirror. I was sitting in front of the vanity dresser, blow drying my damp hair.

"Hey, this leaves you open to dance the night away with Vicki. You should be thanking me."

"Yeah but that doesn't mean I want you to be in his company," Jeremy made a face. "You're my _sister_. And he's a dick. That _hit _you." He groaned. "Oh God, tell me you're not attracted to assholes who hurt you. First Damon and now Tyler…"

"Ew, J. I'm not attracted to _Tyler_." Double gross. Now that my hair was fluffy and dry, I plugged in the straightener. "And Damon's… you know. Damon. We're just pals, though. So not crossing that bridge."

The joint bathroom door suddenly flung open and I tilted my head to see a furious Elena marching in, Bonnie awkwardly hovering in the doorway. Elena put her hands on her hips.

"Who did what now?" I asked, turning back to the mirror, brushing my hair, as something to do while I waited for her to yell at one of us.

"Where is it?" She demanded, looking at Jeremy. "Mrs. Lockwood just _called_, Jer. She's freaking out! She thinks she misplaced the pocket watch!"

"You mean the pocket watch that now belongs to _Jeremy_?" I asked, somehow coming across a knot. What the hell, I just washed my hair, why is it knotted? "I thought we had this argument _yesterday_." It was a screaming match, actually.

"Mom promised Mrs. Lockwood that she could have it on loan, Clare." Elena snapped, her narrowed brown eyes flashing in my direction. "This doesn't involve _you_ so maybe _you_ should keep _your nose_ out of _other people's business_!" Wow, ouch. I turned away from the mirror to frown at her.

"Yeah _mom _promised. Stop trying to act like you're the boss, it's really annoying." Jeremy scoffed, tossing the comic to the side. So much for keeping it in mint condition! "It belongs to me and I don't _want _it on loan."

"What the hell do you mean I should keep my nose out of other people's business?" I demanded with a frown, completely offended. "This is a family matter." Meaning it was _my _business too! "Why are you acting like this? It's just a pocket watch, call her back and let her know there's been a slight change. It's no big _deal_."

"I know you're stirring up trouble!" Elena exploded suddenly. Oh. I glanced at Bonnie who was pointedly looking elsewhere. Good, Caroline, you spilled the beans! "You always have, and now it's gotten worse since you've been hanging out with _Damon_! I know what you told Caroline! I don't know what he and his brother have going on but I'm not getting in the middle of it and neither should you! Telling Care that Stefan has a _drinking _problem is really low!"

Jeremy broke out laughing and fell off my bed. "When Stefan drinks he makes a bloody mess!" I threw the hairbrush at him, my mouth twitching.

"Shut _up_!" I tried to keep my face serious as Elena shot us looks of outrage.

"You told _Jeremy_?" Elena looked like I slapped her. "Clarissa, it's _not _funny!"

"Looks like everyone but you knows more about your boyfriend, Lena," Jeremy joked. "Too busy making out, huh?"

"Too busy taking our parents stuff to sell on ebay to fund your pot addiction?" Elena threw back angrily. Oooh, snap.

Jeremy shot up, looking furious. "You know what? Maybe that's why Stefan doesn't tell you anything! Because he's not the perfect being you imagine him to be and he doesn't want to be judged!" He stormed out of the room, slamming the door so hard that a picture fell off my wall.

Elena made a noise, threw her hands up, gave me a _look_, and stormed past Bonnie who looked like she was feeling extremely awkward. I shrugged my shoulders at her and she gave a tight smile before following after Elena and closing the door. Having siblings was hard. All we ever seemed to do was fight.

"I gotta feeling," I sang to myself, picking up the straightener. "That tonight's gonna be a good night. That tonight's gonna be a good night. That tonight's gonna be a GOOOOOD, GOOOD NIIIIGHT! OOOOOOH!"

"SHUT UP, CLARISSA!" Elena shouted from the bathroom and I burst into silent laughter, grabbing my phone as it buzzed.

Caroline: _bon said she told lena n drama is goin on so yur welcme we both no u wnted me 2 blab! Not sure what ur up 2 but b careful, remebr hos b4 bros! still keep me in the loop, i will have ur bak in w/e it is yur doin. ;)_

I grinned, how quickly this circulates! Christ, girl drama was a lot more fun than I could have ever imagined. Aw, Caroline. She could seriously be my best friend. Like, yeah, she _was _already, but _y'know_. I quickly texted her back: _you know how I roll. Plus if Stefan was just honest with her about things, none of this would be an issue. Just looking out for her in my own way!_ That was true, _too_. Kind of.

I tilted my gaze back toward the mirror, staring at my new self as I straightened my now frizzy hair.

Caroline: _ok. but is this all u or is damon putting thoughts in2 ur head?_

After spending a few hours in the mall with Damon, Caroline had altered her thoughts on him a smidge. While she was still all for me having awesome mind blowing sex with the 'total hottie', she told me to be careful and not let him manipulate me. Given the whole beef between the brothers, Caroline was tilting toward Stefan's side since he was such a _sweetheart_ and Damon was so very obviously the _bad boy_. More like sadistic murdering vampire, but same thing really. 'Boys like that don't do sweet true love romance,' she warned, but I assured her that wasn't what I was looking for. And I wouldn't purposely _hurt _Elena because I was friends with Damon.

A flicker of doubt swelled in my chest but I shrugged it off, because this wasn't Damon's influence. Not _really_. Even if I hadn't become friends with him, I would be doing the same thing. If Vampire Diaries was going to become my life, then I was going to give everyone hell. It appeared this Clarissa was the same way anyway, so it's not like I was acting_ out of character_. And yet… Did Elena _deserve _me putting doubt in her head and messing around in her relationship? …If she was _secure _and felt like she knew Stefan, then it wouldn't matter.

So again, this was all Stefan's fault and not mine!

I texted Caroline back: _prolly all me_

I decided to let Damon know what was going on as well, and that Stefan was probably going to get an earful about his drinking problem from Elena. He clearly thought it was just as hilarious as I found it.

Now in the dress, with my hair up in an elegant looking bun, I searched the closet for heels. How the hell did this Clarissa not have _heels_? She had freakin' everything else! Whatever. Looked like I was going to have to go borrow some from Elena. She was standing in front of her mirror, putting earrings in, and Bonnie was absent. Elena's dark eyes caught mine from the mirror and I smiled cheerfully.

"Just talk to Stefan about it, okay?" Good thing about Elena was that no matter how explosive our fights could get, she was always up for talking about it and getting over them pretty quickly. "I know you guys have only been dating for three weeks, and if he's got some serious problems he's obviously gonna wait a bit before bringing it up, but the fact that you got so worked up over it means you're not feeling secure. So…"

She sighed and turned around. "I _don't _really know anything about him…" She admitted. "He's so… mysterious. He's hiding something from me, and he won't let me in…"

Ugh. "Well," I shrugged. "It _has _only been three weeks, so…"

"But I don't know _anything _about him, Clare! Nothing! Not even what his favorite color is! Jeremy was right, you two seem to know more about him even if it's not even true stuff…" Her shoulders sagged. "I'm sorry I snapped at you like that."

"S'whateva, where's Bon?" Now that she was officially done being pissy, I sauntered into her room. Elena gave my dress an appraising nod, despite having seeing it on me a few days ago.

"Went home to get ready," Elena said, narrowing her eyes a little. "What are you up to?"

I raised my eyebrows innocently as I went to her shoe stash. "What are you talking about?"

"You're up to something. Matt's coming, Jeremy's taking _Vicki_, you had Caroline tell Bonnie Stefan has a drinking problem…" Elena trailed off, hands on her hips as she regarded me. "You're scheming. Is _Damon _in on this? I know Caroline is in on it!"

"_Nooothing _is going on, I just thought Bon could have some company, and J's got a foot in, so…" I shifted through her heels, searching for a pair that would complement my dress. Besides, every party needs some drama going on! Aha! I picked up a pretty pair of lacey heels.

"What are you doing with those?" Elena sounded curious now as I slipped into them. Cool, they fit. It was going to be a hellish night if they didn't.

…I mean I guess I could've worn regular shoes with the dress if Elena's heels had been too big. I'd always wanted to do that.

"You don't mind me borrowing these, right? Apparently I don't own any." I said with a dismissive shrug and Elena stared at me with wide eyes, looking dumbfounded.

"Clare… You're walking."

I faked a surprised gasp. "Oh God, it's a miracle! I thought I was paralyzed from the waist down!"

The doorbell rang and I sauntered into the hall, Elena following after me like she couldn't believe what she was seeing.

"But how? You can't wear heels!" She exclaimed, hovering next to me as I descended the steps, like as if she needed to catch me. I scoffed. Of course I could! I was expected to!

"Don't be absurd, Elena," I chastised dismissively. "I'm a…" _Everett_. "Lady. I can even dance in them too! My feminine powers knows no bounds!" To prove my point, I twirled around, shaking my hips.

"But…" Elena blinked at me. "The last time you were in heels, you tripped and fell down the steps… When did you…?"

Christ.

"This summer I did a lot of practicing in my room while sulking and being miserable," I deadpanned, reaching the door before Elena who was still staring at me with her brows furrowed. "It was a form of self-harm."

Tyler was standing on the other side with his phone out, looking impatient and mildly bored. His dark eyes flickered up to meet mine and he slowly raised his eyebrows. "Uh, Clare, you, um, look…" he trailed off, clearly awkward.

"I know, I'm sexy as hell." I rolled my eyes with a grin, opening the door wider. "Come on in, I'll be ready in a sec."

I hurried back to my room, grabbing my phone and little black purse. Jeremy came trotting out of his room, looking adorable in his suit and I grinned at him. "Catch you on the flipside, little bro." I said as he stared down at my feet. "Yup, I wear heels now! I'm all grown up!"

He and Tyler got into a fighting stare down and I grabbed Tyler's arm, pulling him out of the house. I raised my eyebrows at the sleek looking vintage car waiting for us on the street. If I took I guess, I'd say it was from the 70's. Jeez. I had no idea what was up with this place and vintage cars. Like with Damon I _guess _I could understand…

Tyler totally didn't open the car door for me.

Points off.

All the respectable young men open doors for the respectable young ladies!

…Was he implying he didn't think I was _respectable_?

Jerk.

"So your brother's taking _my_ girlfriend to the party that's hosted at _my _house." Tyler broke the silence, annoyance drenched in his voice and I smiled sweetly.

"Maybe she'll save you a dance," I said with a shrug. "If you have the balls to _dance _with her in the presence of your _mother_."

Did I mention I was a bitch this week?

'Cause I am. I couldn't help the jab.

Tyler tilted his head in my direction, a smirk crawling across his face. "Okay, I see what you're doing. And I accept your challenge." Good freakin' luck. I knew what kind of pressures were on Tyler and how much power his parent's held over him.

I mean mine weren't even here, and I was still doing their bidding.

Lame.

"Hey man, I'm only gonna say this once 'cause, one none of my business, and two because J's my bro. But you can't let them dictate who you like or how you wanna live, 'cause your happiness has to come first and all that lame shit. And if you live for them, you're not _living_." I mean, seriously. I should know.

Tyler glanced at me. "_Thanks_," he intoned sarcastically. "I'm really glad we've got this close girl-bond where we can talk about all this touching stuff."

"Puuuh-leaze, I'm charging you." I grinned. "I'm your therapist. Pay up, Lockwood."

He scoffed. "No way. All I ever seem to be doing is _owing _you. We should spend as little time together as possible."

"It's too late, I gave you expensive advice." I said solemnly. "If you don't pay me back it's gonna get ugly." He flatly ignored me. Okaaay, he asked for it. "I guess I have to give you more advice. SHHHEEEE DON'T CAAAAAAARE ABOUT YOUR CAR! SHE DON'T CAAAAAAAARE ABOUT YOUR MONEY! And that's real good 'cause you've goooot too much to speeeeeend! But if you didn't that wouldn't mean nothin'!"

"What the hell…?" Tyler looked at me like I'd lost my mind and I grinned widely.

"She likes you for yooou! Not because you look like Tyson Beckford with the charm of Robert Redford ooooozing out your ears! But what she seeeeeees! Are your faults and indecisions! Your insecure conditions! And the tears upon the pillow that you sheeeed!"

Understanding flashed across his face and he furrowed his eyebrows. "Are you _serious _right now? Are you _singing _to me? That's not advice!"

"SHEEE DON'T CARE I CAN FLY HER, TO PLAAACES SHE'S NEVER BEEEEEN!" I continued loudly. "SHE LIKES ME FOR MEEEEEEEEEE! SHE'S THE ONE FOR MEEEEEE! WHO CARES IF MOTHER DOESN'T APPROVE AND SHE'S INTO DRUUUUGS? MY ARMS BELONG AROUND HEEEER!"

Tyler promptly turned on his radio and blasted it, drowning out my beautiful singing.

* * *

I have reached a whole new low of pathetic. Tyler (now being the perfect gentleman under his mother's eyes) had offered his arm for me to take and we were standing, arm in arm, in a line up to his big stupid house. But all I could think about was _Damon_. And how much fun this would be with _Damon_. Standing next to Tyler made me miss him.

Like I said, a whole new low.

I'm really, really, pathetic.

I was suddenly feeling a whole lot moodier. Like, why was I even doing this? It was just going to be a smack in the face—I was only going to think about my mother's parties. I figured it was why I had set up all this potential drama around me. I needed distractions.

We reached the prissy, well-mannered, looking woman at the door who unquestionably could have gotten along with Mother. She smiled at me and I schooled my face into a sweet expression, smiling charmingly back at her when I wanted to scream and run in the opposite direction.

"You look beautiful, Clarissa," Mrs. Lockwood said warmly, leaning closer and pressing her bony cheek against mine in the annoying one-armed-hug-fake-kiss-on-the-cheek thing. Focus on not cringing!

"Thank you, Mrs. Lockwood, you've thrown another stunning party." I hoped to God she was like my mother and these little events were a common thing. She straightened, looking pleased. Jackpot.

"Oh, you." She touched my shoulder affectionately, her eyes pointedly turning to her son. Nice. That's not obvious. Never gonna happen. "You two enjoy yourselves. Go on."

Tyler led me away. "Sucking up to my _mother_?" He looked at me with his eyebrows raised and I stared back flatly.

"You said she wanted us to be seen together, so I played it up." Which I was a pro at. I should get an award. I spotted an awkward looking Bonnie and Matt. "Oh look, our friends." Thank freakin' God. I tugged Tyler's arm, pulling him to the couple.

"_Our_?" Tyler scoffed, but he let me pull him anyway and didn't try to escape like I knew he wanted to. Haha. He's stuck on gentleman duty, which I'd abuse until he snaps.

"Hey!" I greeted happily, both Bonnie and Matt smiled warmly at us, looking a little relieved.

"Thank God you're here," Bonnie said with a laugh. "Being surrounded by uptight adults is really boring."

"Yeah, especially when they have nothing better to do than tell us what a cute couple we are." Matt nodded. How horrible.

"How wonderful it is that we're able to look past the struggles of being an _interracial _couple."

"We are strong and _brave_."

"Good for us."

Wow. "You guys are an inspiration to _millions_," I grinned widely, amused. "Great job guys."

"Oh my God, are you in _heels_?" Bonnie suddenly exclaimed, taking a step back to examine my outfit. Holy shit, what is the big deal? She looked impressed. "And you haven't fallen flat on your face, yet?"

I puffed my cheeks out. "Har har. Like I told Lena, I can dance in 'em too." I mean, really. I know that I could be a bit of a clumsy idiot, but not being able to walk in heels? I guess without mother's influence over life, _this _Clarissa didn't have to endure the hours of etiquette classes. Lucky.

"Really?" Tyler looked unimpressed. "Go ahead, dance."

"Yeah, Clare," Matt encouraged with a wide grin. "Dance! This party could have things spiced up a little!"

I glanced uneasily over my shoulder, as if worried my mother would be staring at me in a disapproving way. But she wasn't here. And even if she was… hell, who cares right? New life. No rules!

"Music sucks…" I trailed off and shrugged my shoulders. "Back up and brace yourselves. I'm pure awesome." I could dance to this classical stuff! Bonnie, Tyler and Matt took a few steps away from me, their expressions varying between interested and expecting me to fall flat on my ass. "Gimmie something… swing-y."

Tyler pulled out his iPhone. "Like what?" I brightened. Oh this will be so much easier now.

"Obvs! The Combinations' _Whatcha Gonna Do_!" I gushed, ignoring the odd looks the three of them set me.

Tyler shook his head and typed away on the iPhone. Almost instantly, the familiar music began crinkling through his speakers, the drums and trumpet causing my head to sway along with the beat. I tapped my ankles together, getting into the groove. Moving the beat, I swung my body, spinning and twisting to the music, grinning widely at the surprise that flickered across Tyler and Bonnie's faces while Matt flashed me the thumbs up.

"When did you learn to dance like _that_?" Matt asked, trying to copy my movement. I laughed happily, and grabbed his hands, pulling him closer as I moved us around Tyler and Bonnie.

"What's it called? I've never seen anything like it before!" Bonnie attempted to copy, swaying her hips, twirling her feet like how I was doing with mine.

"Is that the _Northern Soul_?" Damon's amused voice caught me off guard. I spun around, nearly tripping, but he caught my wrists (causing my entire everything to leap with glee), easily pulling me upright. His blue eyes scooped me in and I felt myself almost relaxing, feeling better now that he was here. "This was big in the sixties," he said, turning his gaze toward Bonnie.

"Clearly it's something that needs to be brought back!" Matt stopped dancing, just when it looked like he was finally getting the groove for it. Tyler pocketed his cellphone, and I already missed the music. Aw. "That dance is _awesome_."

Look at me, I'm such a trendsetter.

But no seriously, look at _Damon_, showing up in all black, with his dark hair elegantly disheveled pulling off that bad boy look flawlessly. You know the look—like he may or may not have just rolled out of bed and just thrown something on. How the hell did he do it? I roll out of bed and spend fifteen minutes trying to brush all the knots out.

I could never be a sexy vampire.

I would end up just looking like a crazy bag lady.

"Ugh, I just had to endure my mom's stare down with bringing an _older _guy to—oh. My. God." Caroline came into view and stopped short, her eyebrows raising to her hairline, her eyes on my feet. What the hell? Seriously?

"Yup, she's in heels," Bonnie said with a nod and I was about ready to fling myself from the roof. Was it seriously such a big deal? "She can dance in them too. And I mean _dance_." Caroline stared at me and I shrugged.

"Okaaay, spill. When did _this _happen?" Caroline demanded, her expression turning sassy. She was clearly miffed she wasn't a part of the high heel saga.

"It was over the summer, I was really hating life and decided to try to kill myself via high heels." I deadpanned, Tyler twitched visibly and shot me a dark look as Caroline, Matt, Bonnie blanched while Damon, bless him, _laughed_.

"So. Not. Funny." Caroline hissed, smacking Damon's arm. "So _not _funny, Clare." I raised my hands in surrender but she still smacked my arm really freakin' hard. Jesus.

"Hey guys."

I turned at the sound of Vicki's voice who was holding Jeremy's arm and pointedly smiling widely at all of us but Tyler. Jeremy threw a smirk in Tyler's direction and I dubbed this _The Beginning_. God only knew where it would go from here, but hopefully it'd be delicious drama.

"Hey…" Caroline greeted back a little coolly.

"Hi J," I smiled happily.

"Man, this party is so lame," Vicki continued, looking around. "Come on, let's go get a drink." She tugged Jeremy's arm and I frowned, watching as she pulled the smitten Jeremy away who had barely even glanced at any of us, so caught up with Vicki.

I suddenly realized I made an awful mistake.

Vicki was going to _use _Jeremy to get at Tyler, and while I was all for the drama, I didn't want Jeremy and his feelings to be the catalyst.

"Wow so this just got a lot more weird," Bonnie said pleasantly.

"Totally. Nobody but Elena and Stefan are here with the person they _want _to be here with," Caroline said cheerfully snapping my head back to her. I glanced at Tyler and Matt. Tyler was sneering and Matt was just looking awkward.

"Nice, Caroline." Bonnie groaned and Caroline just shrugged, an innocent look plastered across her face.

"Aw, that's not true, Blondie," Damon purred at her, a charming smile across his face. "I'm _glad _to be here with _you_." Caroline scoffed.

"Uh-huh. That's why you're dressed to match _Clare_ and haven't taken your eyes off her since we got here, right? I know when I'm being used." Caroline flipped her hair over her shoulder and grabbed Matt's arm. Shock jolted through me, and despite myself, my cheeks warmed. But Damon _always _wears black, we weren't _matching_! "Let's go dance. Hope you don't mind, Bon, but it's not like he wants to be here with you anyway."

Matt shrugged at Bonnie awkwardly and let Caroline pull him away and Bonnie threw Caroline an offended look. My frown grew. This wasn't exactly panning out as I had hoped.

"Kitty has got some claws," Damon was clearly amused. "And as if I dressed to match _anyone_, I'm too much of a stud to be tied down." He winked at me and, admittedly, I felt a smidge better.

"She's just pissed she can't hold your attention." Bonnie rolled her eyes. "I'm sure Matt will do a fine job of helping Caroline feel like the queen bee—at least, until he sees Elena." Bonnie's gaze turned slightly accusing and I raised my hands innocently.

"Hey I don't get why you're looking at me like that. I thought it'd be nice if you came with someone." I insisted and Bonnie quirked a very sassy eyebrow at me. My intentions were so obvious! How could this _be_?

Tyler, who had been staring off at something, turned to me suddenly. "Yeah I'm not doing this whole—whatever this is. Later." He didn't even glance at Damon or Bonnie, and stalked off in the direction Vicki and Jeremy had gone. Probably to be dramatic.

"I'm no longer shipping Jicki." It's official. That ship had sailed and now I was sinking it. Jeremy deserved someone better, anyway, and I had been too caught up in thinking about his affection for her to see the truth. Vicki was no good!

"I don't know what that means," Bonnie furrowed her brow at me. "I'm gonna go find Elena and say hi, make sure she and Stefan aren't… _fighting _over rumors…" Bonnie's expression looked exhausted and annoyed suddenly. "And then I'll make sure Caroline isn't throwing a hissy fit on Matt. Glad I'm here, just cleaning up after everybody!"

"You don't _have _to," Damon said cheerfully. "People crave drama. Five minutes into the party and they're already acting out—so you'll just be adding wood to their flames. It's _fine_."

Bonnie pointed a very threatening finger in our direction. "You two," she said in her no nonsense voice, like she was our nanny. "You better be good."

I watched her stride off with a determined look on her face and I wondered why Damon and I were being pinned for this. I mean, all I did was have people invite other people—which they agreed to on their own free will. I was completely, one hundred percent, innocent.

Damon turned to me, a cheeky smirk on his face. He offered an arm. "Will you allow me to be your escort for the rest of the evening, Miss Everett?" His voice lowered at my original surname, his blue eyes glowing mischievously at me and a smile broke across my face. Happily, I slid an arm through his.

"That would be positively delightful, Mr. Salvatore, thank you."

* * *

I've suffered through more boring parties. Really. I have. But maybe it was because I was with _Damon _that made me feel like things needed to be turned up a little bit. Damon lived for vampire dickery and I was tired of living for what my mother approved of. She wasn't even friggin' here. Why was I so stuck on this?

"Clarissa, that is _mahogany_!" Damon's voice was dripping with sarcasm, his mouth tugged into a grin. Slowly, I slid the glass over the wooden table. "Ruined. All ruined."

"You know what they say," I murmured, sliding the glass to the edge of the table. "If you don't like something, throw it on the floor."

Damon was suddenly holding the glass, wagging his finger at me like I was a misbehaving child. "I've never heard that before, so it must not be true."

"That's because you don't hang out with bored teenagers looking to piss off their parents at expensive restaurants." I huffed back, tilting my gaze around the stuffy room. Speaking of pissing off parents… "Where's Stefan?"

"Being furious at me," Damon said lazily. "Elena has decided to not be upset with Stefan as _I'm _just trying to stir trouble and she won't let me come between them—and Stefan's putting all this on me." How the hell did he know all that? Damon smirked and pointed to his ears. It's like he has front row seats to their drama 24/7!

"So you're saying everything horrible I do, is your fault?" Oh my God, this party suddenly got a hell of a lot better. Damon paused, his expression tilting toward curious.

"It would seem that way, yes," he answered almost cautiously, his blue eyes squinting. "What are you planning?"

"What are _you _planning?" I countered, taking his arm and leading him out of the room, searching for Elena and Stefan.

"I'll tell you if you tell me," Damon sang.

"Nope. If you wanted me to know, you would've told me already." I puffed out a breath. "Instead I'm just going to blindly follow you. Like this is a religion. Damonism." Damonism? "Christ, you're the Devil."

He flashed me a dark smile. "And Stefan is the angel."

"No, I play the role of the angel. I'm tragic and beautiful." I threw Damon a look—like _really_. Why would Stefan be the angel? He's not even pretty. "Stefan is just this whiney drug addict." He rolled his eyes at me.

"You can't play the role of the angel," he said with a shake of his head. "You _threw_ yourself from grace, stole a body, and have been dancing with the Devil in the pale moonlight." Damon's lips curved into a smirk, which, hell, he gets points for quoting Batman. "You play the role of my minion." All those points have been thrown into the garbage. I smiled sweetly at him.

I was going to strap him down and force feed him those words. And then make him choke on them. Damon might make me feel dizzy and I might be stuck in perma-sexual tension, but there was no way in hell I was _his _minion. If anything, he was mine.

He just didn't realize that yet.

* * *

Damon would be lying if Clarissa's appearance hadn't taken him off guard, just a little. He hadn't believed her when she said she'd be wearing black. He was expecting her to be dressed in a red dress with white polka-dots. _That _was Clarissa's style. Her simple black dress was flattering to her form, her dark hair pulled into a tight bun with a few curled strands falling almost elegantly down. She had an air of sophisticated indifference surrounding her that could only be achieved through years of practice. In short, everything about this Clarissa who showed up to the Founder's party screamed social elite, something that Damon found he couldn't stand. Blondie hadn't been exaggerating, the moment they stepped in line and he spotted Clarissa, he hadn't been able to look anywhere else. Irritation coiled through his stomach tightly, he had to resist whisking her away from that damnable Lockwood. Clarissa would _never _have to pretend to be anything with him.

And now she was smiling sweetly up at him in that sort of way that suggested she had a devious plan cooking up. She clearly did not like the idea of being his minion, and Damon couldn't wait to see what trouble she'd stir up. This party was getting so _boring_.

"…and Stefan Salvatore…?" Elena's incredulous, almost _suspicious_, voice led Damon into another part of the manor where his brother was uncomfortably shifting his weight between feet, standing next to his Katherine look alike who was staring up at what appeared to be the original guest registry.

The Lockwoods were clearly a bunch of hoarders.

"Mmhm, the _original _Salvatore brothers," Damon drawled pleasantly, tilting his brother's and _Elena_'s attention to him, both looking equally unhappy to see him. His heart jerked as his gaze landed on Elena's devastatingly familiar face, those wary brown eyes striking him so hard that he almost recoiled. For a moment, it was Katherine looking at him with uneasy antipathy. Clarissa's fingers drummed softly against his arm, and the feeling eased away. He pulled his lips into a sarcastic grin, shifting closer to her. "Our ancestors. Tragic story, actually."

"And to pass on the tradition of misery and anguish, the Salvatore's are required to have two sons and name them Stefan and Damon." Clarissa added cheerfully. "The Damon before this one was actually a cross dresser in the 70's. It's all really fascinating stuff."

Damon slid his blue eyes down to his tiny human, amused, while Elena's expression became more curious. "Crazy times the 70's," he said with casual indifference.

"I'd love to hear about your family's history," Elena smiled warmly at Stefan, her gaze hopeful, tone cheerful. There was a slight edge to it—she _clearly _was tired of Stefan's aversion to anything personal and Damon grinned wider.

"Trust me, it's boring," Stefan shot down dismissively, narrowing his eyes slightly and smiling tightly at Damon. As if to _warn _him.

"Love, betrayal, _murder_!" Clarissa gasped dramatically, obviously picking up on the uneasy tension between her pretend sister and his brother. "Hardly boring!" She might as well have said 'look Elena, Damon and I aren't dating and I know everything!'

"Now…" Stefan began, his gaze shifting toward Elena. He looked almost pleadingly. "Now isn't the right time for that." Elena gave a short, highly disappointed, nod and Damon was certain he knew exactly what Clarissa was thinking.

How do they make this even more dramatic?

If he could somehow get Elena alone, he could get her to like him again (or at the very least be on friendly terms with him), and give her what Stefan wouldn't—a talk about their _mysterious _past. Surely Clarissa would come to the same conclusion.

_THAWK_.

Stefan hissed and bounced up and down. Damon blinked, and turned to Clarissa, who had just kicked Stefan in the shin. That wasn't at all what he had been thinking—amusing, yes. But good God, not at all what he had been thinking. Her expression was blank.

"Clarissa!" Elena snapped, turning to look worriedly at Stefan. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry about her, are you okay? Clare, what is wrong with you? Why would you do that?" Elena threw her sister a look and Clarissa blinked.

"Damon, what the shit?" Clarissa frowned, turning her blue-gray eyes up to Damon causing his eyebrows to slowly rise. What the hell was she up to? Damon stared back down at her, curiously. She turned, her expression immediately guilty and apologetic as she looked at Stefan. "I don't know what happened. I'm sorry Stefan, I don't know what… came over me." Damon nearly grinned, understanding where she was going with this. "I know this sounds crazy, but I couldn't help myself! Honest!"

Stefan glowered at Damon who flashed him a taunting little smirk right back. Clarissa could stake Stefan in the stomach, right now, and it would _still _be Damon's fault. She was incorruptible in Stefan's eyes. Dumbass.

"She must be bored," Damon shifted his shoulder upward into a shrug. "It happens. She has a short attention span."

"I _know_, Damon, I've lived with her for seventeen _years_." Elena frowned, narrowing her annoyed brown eyes. "But being _bored _doesn't mean you're allowed to kick people!"

"It's fine," Stefan assured quickly, leaping to poor Clarissa's rescue. His green eyes flickered to Clarissa and he smiled faintly, irritating Damon suddenly. Stefan clearly believed the only reason Clarissa disliked him was because of _Damon_. "It's okay."

"Not it isn't." Elena sighed. "Clare, why don't you go find Caroline or Bonnie, maybe dance a little to get your… excess energy out. Stefan? Do you mind? She can take this time to _apologize_, too."

"I don't want to dance with him." Clarissa said with a frown, clearly miffed.

"Well I think you should." Elena crossed her arms, easily sliding into the role of _parent_. Damon's gaze slid toward the small human as her fingers tightened on his sleeve. "And maybe explain to him why you've been spreading rumors about him having a _drinking _problem, and why you feel the need to act out around him. You've been really immature, Clare, and you need to take the time to get to know him. I need to talk to Damon, anyway."

Damon found himself openly frowning at Elena alongside Clarissa. Good God, this human could be bossy. Elena was fixing him with an expectant look, her eyebrows slightly raised. None of this was going the way Damon had hoped it would. And now Stefan was going to _dance _with Clarissa? But… He didn't _want _Stefan to dance with Clarissa. Stefan wouldn't know how to keep up with her. Clarissa would be _miserable_. And bored. And Stefan had Elena, there was no need for him to just… stumble around trying to _impress _Clarissa—which, he wouldn't. It wasn't happening, they weren't dancing together. Ever.

"Stefan," Elena turned her pretty brown eyes to Damon's brother and Damon knew Stefan wouldn't refuse her, even if it meant leaving her alone with his big bad brother.

"Uh—sure." Stefan smiled faintly at Clarissa. "Would you care to dance, Miss Gilbert?" Damon's irritation was growing, his mood twisting into a darker one. _Miss Gilbert_. Damn would be damned if he had to watch Stefan fumble around, dancing with someone who wasn't _for him_ a second fucking time.

"Oh yes, Stefan is an expert at dancing," Damon murmured dryly. "He can do the waltz, the jitterbug, the moonwalk—take your pick."

"Clearly I didn't catch the memo today that stated I were to be passed around at everyone's _convenience_," Clarissa's voice was casual and Damon realized, with surprise, that he had _insulted _her. "Go on, _Mother _Elena, have your adorable little sit down with Damon to discuss how I'm misbehaving. I'm glad to know that everybody here sees me only as means to be used. With Tyler, it's to look good for his mother, with Stefan it's to keep me away from his evil brother. Damon and I can't _possibly _have a real friendship, he must be using me too! Poor Clarissa!" She flashed Stefan a sweet little smile and easily slipped from Damon's side, snatching Stefan's hand. Damon's eyes narrowed at the contact. "Come along, Stefan, I'm sure Caroline would love to dance with you. I _apologize_, but you can't handle me on the dance floor. In fact, you can't handle me at all. I'm far too good for the likes of you."

Elena clearly looked hurt as Stefan, as if dazed, let the small human drag him away. "Clare," she called, slumping her shoulders. "Can we not do this now? Please."

Damon watched as Clarissa pranced past him, Stefan in _hand_, without a single glance in his direction. The _hell_? She was pissed at him? Damon's mood was turning black, and he found himself feeling irritated and unreasonably unhappy. Like hell he needed Clarissa, she was just a silly little human girl who was overemotional and—

Did she just… smack his ass?

Damon turned, completely baffled, and Clarissa threw a smirk at him from over her shoulder. She just smacked _his ass_! "Try not to get into any love triangles while I'm gone, D, I'll be _soooo _pissed." She teased and his mouth fell open. Clarissa, what the _hell_? "I know Elena feels are powerful, but resist them! You must!"

Stefan's green eyes met Damon's, his expression stunned confusion, and all Damon could do was offer a slight, bewildered, shrug of his shoulders as though to say _it's Clarissa_. The two brothers were in a mutual state of being thoroughly stunned by her words.

Almost as though unnerved, Damon's blue eyes slid back toward Elena, shoving down the familiar leap of longing that stirred in his chest. This was _Elena_, not his Katherine, and being alone with her, having her attention completely on him, left a terrible hallow feeling inside his chest. He suddenly wished Clarissa was beside him.

"It would seem that I owe you an apology," Damon smiled at her pleasantly, despite his uneasy. Elena had Katherine's face, but they were so very different. She folded her arms. "My brother and I have a _lifetime _of issues, which I'm sure he'll share with you eventually. I can promise I haven't purposely pulled Clary into anything, she's just… very protective."

Elena raised her eyebrows. "She only knows your side of the story, which I'm sure is very biased."

"And you know neither sides, so perhaps you shouldn't be so quick to look down at her for the way she's reacted?" Damon suggested flatly causing surprise to flicker across her face, her pretty mouth parting in surprise. Damon cursed himself for wanting to appease her—this wasn't _Katherine_, and he almost hated Elena for looking like her.

"I just… I just don't want her pulled into yours and Stefan's problems, we've been through so much the past few months and she's finally better…" Elena's beautiful brown eyes became pleading and Damon bit back a sigh, angry at how easily he was becoming undone.

"She's not." Damon said shortly, pointedly not elaborating on whether he meant she wasn't _finally better _or if he wasn't _pulling _her into his and Stefan's _problems_. Elena nodded, regardless, and chewed on her lower lip.

"Do you… Do you know why Stefan isn't… telling me anything?" She looked hesitant and Damon was itching to slip out of the room and find Clarissa. This was supposed to be a talkabout _Clarissa_ and how he was a terrible influence, yet it always came back to _Stefan_. Because _Stefan _was always the most important thing, apparently. Clarissa deserved a better pretend sister.

"My response would obviously be _biased_," Damon tossed back casually. "But since you asked, I would say it would be because he's afraid of you getting to know him. I can talk to him if you want." He smiled at her sarcastically.

Fifteen minutes. _Fifteen _minutes, that's how long Stefan's human Katherine look alike dragged it out for. The conversation had flipped between Stefan and Clarissa, and Damon was about ready to pull his own hair out. He'd gotten used to being with Clarissa, where everything was easy and fun. Looking at Katherine's look alike who acted so much like Stefan was driving him nuts. How could Stefan _like _her? She was _nothing _like Katherine! Though, of course Stefan would like her. He clearly never cared about Katherine in the first place. It _would _be easy for him to move on to someone who looked exactly like her, without the whole complicated vampire package and different (annoying) personality. They could be uptight and judgmental _together_. What a lovely pair.

He sauntered outside, under the twinkling lights and dancing couples, searching for his human. He was bored, he was annoyed, and Clarissa so very easily made everything _better_. His blue eyes swept the area—Elena was dancing with Stefan in the corner (Damon ignored the jab—that _wasn't_ Katherine), Blondie, Witchy, and some boy (who was staring longingly at Elena) were not-so-subtly drinking Champagne at one of the tables, Pretend Brother and that Lockwood kid were in an argument with their love interest standing awkwardly between them. Damon smirked, amused, only for surprise to pulse through him. Where the _hell _was Clarissa, she set up all this up and was now missing it? She would've fluttered between them by now, probably getting herself punched again. Damon tilted his head, searching for the loud human girl. Where could she have possibly disappeared to?

Clarissa was obviously having a _quickie _in the bathroom and Damon repressed a sigh. Hadn't he told her to include him in that sort of stuff? She was only going to get dramatic if she didn't have him snap her out of it. Damon strolled back toward the Lockwood manor.

He found her in the second floor bathroom.

Clarissa was a hysterical mess of bitterness and tears, her cheeks blotchy, eyes red. He was slightly amused to find she had broken the bathroom mirror. Probably with her heels, given there was no sign of injury or blood.

"She never loved me." Clarissa raved, half hysterical. "I was never first. I never mattered. She shouldn't have had me. My whole life I've been doing nothing but trying to gain her attention, even if it was negative. I would have done _anything_, and even now I'm still so pathetically desperate—but I'll never get it now. I'll never get it now…"

As he suspected. She was past the _dramatic _point. They were headed into _Stefan-angst _territory.

"You weren't going to get it no matter what you did," Damon assured her dismissively and she tilted those sad, sad gray-blue eyes to him looking all so very pathetic and gloomy. "Move on. Actively seek _my _attention." He was trying to get her to grin, and it bothered him that he wasn't succeeding. "See? You've got it. And you didn't have to try. Amazing job, Clary! I'm fulfilling my canary duties."

She burst into loud tears and Damon sprang backwards. _Damn it_. Why was she always_ crying_ around him? He didn't know what to do! Clarissa might've had her moments, but he never seen her this… _weepy_. This was years of angry bitter resentment—and sure, Damon could _relate_, but that didn't mean he knew how to fix it! He usually just went on drinking-fucking-killing binges! And he doubted suggesting that would really fly with the tiny human… He felt an awkward tug of panic, he needed her to stop crying. _Now_.

"Do something! Do something!" She blurted out, her eyes widening. "I'm freaking out! I can't be like this! It's _easy _to be sad, and I have to… I have to… why didn't she just _love _me? I hate her! I hate this face, it's not mine! She _wins_! She always _wins_! She can't make me sad, but she still is, even over here! She wins! I'm forever trapped in this stupid—!"

Damon flitted in front of her, grabbing her wet face in his hands. Clarissa, teary eyed, snot running down her face, stared back at him pathetically. With a sickening _CRUNCH_, she fell limply in his arms and Damon took a breath as his heart skipped the moment hers stopped. At least she wasn't spiraling into hysteria anymore. He wasn't sure what else to do. Damon shifted her, curling an arm around her waist and pulling her closer. His gaze trailed over her blotchy red face, to the freckles that dotted across her nose, to the dark eyelashes with droplets of tears clinging to them. Gently, he ran his thumb over her damp cheek.

"Idiot," Damon told the dead Clarissa softly, sliding down the wall and pulling her into his lap. Her head lolled against his chest. "You really have a way with me. I just can't seem to stop killing you. You should be flattered, Clary. Killing is usually a one-time thing with me. This might mean we're going _steady_."

_Th-thump… thump_. Her heartbeat flickered weakly, her chest rising as air suddenly hit her lungs. Clarissa's face crinkled with pain, her eyes fluttering open to stare up at him in a hazy confusion. A faint grin stole across his face. Damon always seemed to be swept into giddy relief whenever Clarissa stirred back to life.

"Hey snotty," he greeted softly, cooing. "Sorry I killed you. I don't really know how to do the whole _crying _thing."

"Dick," she breathed, wincing. "But thanks. You're a real pal." He wondered how she managed to pull off sounding sincere _and _sarcastic at the same time. His grin twitched wider.

"Asshole serial killer BFF," he reminder her merrily. "Absolutely _any_thing for you, Claryberry." Pleasantly, he rubbed his sleeve over her face and she whined. "Shh, hold still, you have snot _everywhere_."

"Damon," she choked out. "Later. Fucking—hurts."

Ah.

Right.

Broken neck and all that. Damon supposed he hadn't thought this through, and he didn't have time for her to pass out for a few hours. That would be a little hard to explain. He brought his wrist to his mouth, his fangs sliding out, and bit into his own flesh. Clarissa stared at him in pained, exhausted, confusion.

"Is this a pain pact? I hurt, so you hurt?" Her voice was sounding groggy, slurring a little. He rolled his eyes.

"Suck it, Clary." He threw back, bringing his wrist to her mouth. "I mean that literally. It's magical healing blood. I reaaaally can't have you passing out on me."

"S'kinda intimate, D…" she mumbled.

"_Everything _we do is intimate," Damon shushed her. "Now drink."

Her tiny fingers slid over his wrist and warmth spilled through him where her skin met his. Clarissa's mouth brushed over his skin, her soft tongue running over his self-inflicted wound. He bit back a groan as she drank from him. This shouldn't be turning him on as much as it was, and now he knew what her mouth on his skin felt like. _Damn it_.

"Seriously the weirdest fucking thing…" she muttered against his wrist, her breath drafting across his wet skin making it tingle. "But suddenly everything is so much… better. Why have I been napping through this broken neck stuff when you've been hoarding magical vampire blood?"

"Because I clearly enjoy you suffering." Damon's voice came out a little bit more huskier than he intended but Clarissa didn't seem to notice.

Her fingers were latched onto his hand and Damon felt an odd sense of wonderment. He'd never been so _needed _before and he _liked _it. He liked being needed. He liked being needed by _Clarissa_. She was quiet and Damon rested his chin on top of her head, his fingers drawing soothing circles on her bare shoulder. He happily listened as her heart danced to his touch, and was certain she was over her crying spat. Clarissa seemed to be content with playing with his hand, bending his fingers and tracing over the lines in his palm. He's done so much damage with his hands, he's _killed _her with them, and she could make them seem so ordinary. She could make all this seem so very ordinary and Damon wasn't sure how that made him feel.

"There was an… older boy who used to work with the catering staff that my mother used for events and her reunions." Clarissa began softly.

Damon wasn't sure if he liked listening to her stories because he knew he was the only one who was going to know them, or if because he genuinely wanted to know about her previous life. It might've been a little bit of both.

"I met him when I was seven, his name was Michael, and he was the only thing that made those parties… Bearable. I walked in on him and some off the cooks getting high as hell in the men's bathroom—which is where I'd go to cry, because men are in and out of bathrooms and won't deal with a crying child in a stall, unlike women…"

Damon snorted. God_damn _it Clarissa. It was hilariously pathetic.

"Having quickies in the men's bathroom at the age seven, for shame, Clary." Damon grinned wolfishly down at the small human and she peered up at him with her glassy, red-rimmed, gray-blue eyes. A smile cracked across her face and Damon felt immensely proud of himself.

"My first thought was to blackmail him," she continued softly, returning to playing with his hand and Damon's eyebrows slowly rose. "But… People who are blackmailed usually backstab you and I was desperate. So I struck a deal with him. If he'd snuck me a little tiny paper cup of Pepsi, I'd pay him fifty bucks."

Damon stared down at her. He hadn't expected her story to go in this direction, but he never expected half the shit that comes out of her mouth.

"See here I thought this was going to be a touching story about this boy who became your only salvation to those events, but he was your _sugar _dealer?" Damon wondered, almost incredulously.

Clarissa was grinning widely at him. "Look man, I just needed a little to tie me over." _This _was one of the reasons why Clarissa was his tiny exception. She was fucking nuts.

"You have a fucking problem." Damon snorted, pleased as her mood continued to rise. "I will personally see to it you never become a vampire. If sugar has such a hold on you, God help us on what blood would do." Secretly, Damon couldn't help but wonder how much more _fun _things would become if she were a vampire...

"Stefan and I could ripper into the night." She teased and Damon was startled by the mental image. _Never_. "But anyway… I hadn't seen Michael since I was twelve when I pulled a prank and it was blamed on the entire company, whom Mother fired."

"You single-handedly ruined his life, Clary." Damon told her gravely. "Alright, let's get back to that party. Where are your heels?"

"I don't know," Clarissa admitted with a shrug of her shoulders. "I went a little… cray-cray." _Cray-cray_? Damon decided not to say anything. It was either a _Clarissa _expression or something that could potentially reduce her to tears with the whole 'I don't belong here' thing.

Damon rose to his feet, debating whether or not he should lower Clarissa to the ground. He wasn't sure he could trust her to not step on the scattered glass. "Sit on the toilet and don't _move_," he instructed, helping her to the ground. Clarissa frowned at him and Damon rolled his eyes, pushing her down. "Stay. Or slice your foot open with two vampires lurking around. Oh, found one!" Damon flitted across the bathroom and picked up the heel. "Was smashing the mirror necessary?"

"I got emotional." Clarissa shrugged her shoulders as Damon threw her heel at her. She gave a cry of surprise and clumsily caught it as Damon found her second heel in the sink. Perfect place for it, really. He tossed the second heel at her and she threw him a look, standing and wiggling into her heels—which, honestly, Damon was highly impressed someone like Clarissa could wear. "I never asked, but what do you do after you snap my neck? Do you just awkwardly sit around for a few minutes waiting for me to rise from the dead?"

"I pick your nose," Damon replied with a slight incline of his shoulder, shrugging with mock indifference. Clarissa's face tilted toward surprise, and she blinked at him. "Mmhm. The entire time you're lying there dead, I pick your nose and make you eat your boogies. And then I have a good laugh. Like ha-ha you're dead you can't stop me."

Amusement flooded her still blotchy face, eyes lighting as a large grin sprinted across her pink mouth. "No you _don't_!"

"I do." He deadpanned, feeling like he could live off her amusement. He _wanted _to make her laugh and he felt the surprise of this realization stir in his chest. "I'm the evilest vampire you will ever meet."

Those eyes of hers were brimming with such gleeful amusement that Damon found himself grinning widely at her. He flitted in front of her, gently taking her chin in his fingers and imitating the sound of a neck snapping as he lightly jerked her face. Clarissa was laughing as he threw her into his chest, stroking her hair. "Shhh, you're dead…" he said cheerfully, making a dive for her nose with his fingers. She shrieked and slapped his hand away.

"Damon!" She cried with laughter.

"Stay dead, Clary! Don't come back! Go into the light…" He urged, swatting her hand away. She shrieked again and wiggled in his hold but he wrapped his arm around her, keeping her pinned to his chest. "You don't want this horrible, undead, life! Fight it! Fight it! Don't come back to life!"

"Damon!" She begged with laughter. "No, stop!" She bit his finger, as if that would keep him from pretending to try to pick her nose! He gasped dramatically.

"You bit me! Oh God, I've been _infected_! You've cursed me with this horrible existence! I—cannot—resist!" He dipped her lowly to the ground suddenly and her eyes widened as she screeched in surprise, her arms hurriedly wrapping around his neck, clearly afraid he'd drop her. Damon's mouth jerked upward into a smirk. He flatly ignored the jolt that flashed through him as her fingers curled at the base of his neck, her fingertips sparking against his skin. "I must feed, Clary… I MUST FEED!"

"No!" She shrieked with laughter, tears of mirth forming.

Her glee was so tangible that he brightened, her laughter bouncing through him. With a grin, he lowered his head and growled, pretending to bite her. She was laughing so hard that it mostly sounded like shrieks. It was remarkable, he's made girls scream before. In terror. _In pleasure_. But never out of laughter. It was sort of… empowering, the feeling.

"Damon! Damon! Stop, no, you're hurting meee! Damoooon, nooooo!"

The door flew open and Clarissa, tears of laughter streaming down her face, tilted her head as Damon lifted his. Stefan was standing awkwardly in the doorway, green eyes wide, his expression shifting from angrily concerned to downright confused. His gaze flickered to the shattered mirror, back to them. Damon couldn't imagine what it must've looked like.

"It's exactly what it looks like," Clarissa said after a tense moment. "It was a really violent quickie."

Damon nearly dropped her as he burst into laughter.

* * *

"Where the hell have you been?" Caroline huffed as I approached what I assumed was now _our table_. Bonnie and Matt smiled in greeting while Tyler was moodily slumped in his seat, texting away on his phone and ignoring everybody.

For some reason I was reminded of prom and suddenly wished there was cake.

"Elena and I got into a fight." I shrugged my shoulders, sitting down in between Caroline and Bonnie. I assumed Damon was getting a lecture from Stefan, given Stefan had calmly told me to go find my friends as he needed a _word _with Damon. Ha.

"Well you missed the fight between Tyler and Jeremy." Caroline continued, bringing the glass of what I assumed was alcohol to her lips. I frowned, and turned around in my seat, searching for my fake brother.

"Hey, here's a great idea, why don't you keep your nose out of my business?" Tyler snapped waspishly. "You too, Clare. Thanks for stirring up petty drama! I'm thrilled that it's backfired onto you!" And yet he wasn't getting up and walking away dramatically.

Probably couldn't.

He didn't have any other friends!

Ha!

Caroline threw him a dirty look while I merely grinned.

"You're a real friggin' dick, Tyler." Caroline snapped back. "You only invited Clare here to impress your _mommy _so that makes you three times worse than anything she's done!" Aw, coming to my defense! Tyler pretended to be looking for something in his coat and then slid his middle finger out of his pocket, giving her a flat look. Pfffft.

"Okay, everybody cool down," Matt said raising his eyebrows. "I'm sure Clare didn't set this up to start drama, she just wants everybody to have a good time." Nope, I'm just a giant bitch. "And Tyler isn't _using _Clare. Right, Ty?"

"Jeez," I waved my hand dismissively. How about we don't pretend? "He totally is, and I totally had Jeremy invite Vicki to start shit. I'm a bitch, and it's my bad." Matt and Tyler looked at me with surprise, Caroline smirked approvingly while Bonnie snorted.

"Oh, Clare…" Bonnie said with a faint smile, shaking her head. "This is why we love you." What was that supposed to mean?

"God I am so _hungry_!" Vicki's voice tugged my attention away and she threw a paper plate down on the table, grinning almost drunkenly. Jeremy was acting equally as loopy and stumbled, falling into the chair between Bonnie's and Matt's and pulled Vicki down onto his lap. Tyler threw them an outraged look. "Quit it, Jer!" Vicki said with a laugh, smacking his chest. "Awww, Ty, don't be maaaad."

"Are you two _high_?" Caroline asked with a frown. "Seriously? You're, like, at a _party_."

"It's, like, none of your business!" Jeremy tossed back with a cocky smirk, pulling Vicki back into his lap. Weird. Totally didn't wanna watch this. I leaned forward and dragged the paper plate to me, picking at the fruit. Mm, delicious strawberries!

"Hey Vick, why don't we go dance?" Tyler suggested suddenly and for a moment Vicki looked like she was going to swoon, until her eyes flickered in my direction and she scowled, snatching the plate back. Rude.

"Get lost, Tyler, she's with _me_," Jeremy said loudly.

"Why don't you go dance with your _date_?" Vicki added with a scoff. Okaaay getting more awkward. "Because clearly _your girlfriend_ isn't good enough, you had to go and take little miss perfect over there with the perfect house and the perfect life!" Oh jeeeez.

Caroline gasped. "It's true, Clare has the most perfect life of _all_!" She agreed with a nod. "Clearly the better choice over a high school dropout junkie going nowhere in life, most likely to die early from an overdose."

"Don't talk about my sister like that, Care." Matt said the same time Jeremy growled "Don't talk about Vick like that!" I inched the plate back to me slowly. Hello, drama!

"I didn't fucking dropout!" Vicki snapped as she stood up, swaying a bit. And boy, was she loud. "Don't be such a fucking bitch, acting like you're _better _than me!"

Caroline looked down at her. "I don't have to _act_."

"Enough!" Bonnie slammed her hands down on the table. "This is getting out of control and it's petty and stupid."

"C'mon, babe, let's dance," Tyler urged, standing as well. "I was wrong to take Clare, it won't happen again." Not like I'm sitting right here or anything. Thanks.

"You're embarrassed by me." Vicki said quietly, looking hurt. "No matter what I do I won't be good enough for you."

"That's not true," Tyler assured, pulling her closer. "I'm an ass, Vick, I make shitty decisions, I let my parents dictate what I do—but I can, and will, change." Dude, he's stealing what I said to him! And he didn't even pay me! Never gonna therapy his ass again!

But seriously. They really needed to do this somewhere else. It was like watching one of those shitty reality TV shows, only it was upsetting Jeremy so I was really torn about how to feel.

"You'll _always _be my first choice," Jeremy stated passionately. Oh God, here it comes. My phone buzzed in my purse. "You are perfect the way you are. I have never been ashamed, and I never will be ashamed, of being in your company!"

I opened the phone, finding a text from Damon: _seriously, I could just fly over, snap her neck, and return to Stefan before anybody noticed anything. Say the word._ I smiled faintly. This was horrible—I shouldn't be grinning, because I had a feeling Damon was being completely serious.

_What are you and Steffy even still talking about? _I texted back instead.

"HA! You're both just—just _using _me to one up the other!" Vicki was loudly saying. "All you care about is out doing the other! This isn't even about me!"

_Miss me? _Damon texted back almost instantly and my smile grew.

_Desperately_, I texted back, slightly amused and secretly half serious. Whoops!

_Don't fret, we shall be reunited soon and it will be Earth shattering_, Damon texted back and immediately I got another text.

From Stefan. _Stop texting Damon I'm trying to talk to him_.

I am so done with these vampires, oh my God.

Damon sent another text: _TELL HIM WE'RE SEXTING!_ _STEFAN CAN'T STOP OUR SEXY LOVE_

Done.

So done.

Whatever. I texted Stefan: _Stop trying to make this a threeway Steffy!_ _Take your Defan feels elsewhere! _And then I texted Damon: _GOD YES DAMON SEXT ME HARDER!_ Because, really, fuck it. Damon started this.

"Hey," Caroline prodded my arm. "Quit texting and come to the ladies with me." I looked over to her, and then realized we were alone at the table. "Vicki threw a hissy fit so Matt's taking her home, Jeremy followed, Bonnie went to go find Elena and Tyler—well… He stormed off. You missed another fight."

I dropped my buzzing phone back into my purse and stood, grinning. "Whoops."

Apparently Caroline just wanted to reapply her makeup, which was fine. I sat on the counter, swaying my feet, continuing to text Damon and Stefan. Somehow the three of us had entered into a conversation, which I'm not really sure how that even happened, but it worked. I'd send the same text to both of them, and they'd respond the same way.

Stefan: _How can you say that about George Lucas? Unimaginative? Are you kidding? The man is a genius. He only created STAR WARS_.

Damon: _His morals are shit, and extreme. There is no balance. There is only light and darkness._

Yeah no joke, this was what the conversation had become. Vampires seriously had no lives. BECAUSE THEY'RE DEAD, GET IT? Har, haaar. I'm hilarious.

I texted: _Emotions=Dark Side, No Emotions=Light Side. To be "good" you basically have to be a religious figure to the force (god), and to love means your emotions run you, you let fear (chaos, passion) turn you into something corrupt._

I lowered my phone, looking over to Caroline curiously as she reapplied her lip gloss. "I'm so done with going after men who are clearly interested in other girls," she said, smacking her lips together. "I've decided I'm done with the chasing. Boys have to chase _me _now."

I grinned widely. "That's probably the best thing I've heard all week, Care. You're a sexy powerhouse of awesome, let the boys flock."

Stefan: _You're romanticizing villains_.

Damon: _You're idolizing pretentious douchebags who sit on a high horse. Prequels aside._

I texted: _Look at the Jedi code: __There is no emotion, there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no passion, there is serenity. There is no death, there is the Force. Compare it to the Sith code: Peace is a lie, there is only passion. Through passion, I gain strength. Through strength, I gain power. Through power, I gain victory. Through victory, my chains are broken. The Force shall free me. Not romanticizing anything._

"I think you should really try to talk Jeremy out of doing drugs and hanging around Vicki." Caroline said softly and I glanced at her, surprised. "And I'm not saying that because I care what he does, I'm saying it because I'm _worried _about you. I know how close you guys are, and, well… If he hurts, you hurt."

I shrugged a shoulder. "I don't really like Vicki anymore, either, now that I see what's going on… But he really cares about her. That has to mean something. And drugs aside… he's gotta figure this out himself. I'm not going to tell him what to do." Even if I didn't think he was making the best decisions. I knew how important it was to have the freedom to figure things out.

Caroline raised her eyebrows. "You don't have to be _bossy_, you can just… voice your feelings."

"I'm not going to express my disapproval to sway what he does, that's not fair, Care… and it could backfire. He could rebel, to spite me." She snorted.

"Jeremy spiting you—I would _pay _to see that. I really would." Caroline turned back to the mirror. "And what's going on with you Elena? You were fighting? I haven't seen her at _all _tonight."

I shifted uncomfortably, glancing down on the ongoing fight about Star Wars on my phone. The Salvatore brothers seemed content with arguing, despite the fact that I stopped texting. "She's parenting me." I said at last, realizing Caroline was the best person to talk to. Best friend thing, and all. "I'm a _misbehaving _child in her eyes. She and Stefan are _both _trying to parent me."

"She feels responsible," Caroline said thoughtfully, shifting around her dress in the mirror. "She feels like she has to take care of you and Jeremy. She thinks that, like, nobody thinks she's allowed to be a sad teenager. She has to be the adult, despite Jenna stepping in, you know? It's dumb. She'll get over it." Her blue eyes slid over to me. "She's freaked. Along comes Damon and suddenly you're full-swing trouble maker again."

I frowned. "Damon has little influence over that. I was doing that shit before he showed up."

"Yeah but Damon is sexy danger guy, Clare. And you two have this intense thing going on. She just wants to protect you." Caroline's smile turned suggestive. Sexy danger guy? "I think it'll be good for you, as long as you don't, you know, have feelings for him." She wiggled her eyebrows and I laughed, sliding off the counter.

"It's not like that with me and D, I mean—yeah. There's that stupid sexual tension crap, but—pretty sure it's one sided, anyway." I jutted my lip out into a pout. "Let's not talk about it, 'cause I'm not gonna let the sexual feels rule my life."

"Fiiiine." Caroline huffed, linking her arm with mine. "Let's go find Elena and Bonnie."

I flipped open my phone, nodding, and scrolling through the texts.

Damon: _I can do whatever I want, I'm a Sith_.

What the shit.

Stefan: _Your evil will not be tolerated._

Are they… Roleplaying?

Damon: _That's unfortunate, for I am evil and will veto your claim!_

Stefan: _Well I'll veto that veto for I am President Jedi!_

Damon: _I'll veto your veto because the system is wicked by nature and easily corruptible_!

Oh, yeah, sure. Evilest vampire, my ass. Here to make Stefan suffer for all eternity, riiiight.

Stefan: _I'll re-veto it because I'm an up and young coming optimistic Jedi with the will to remove the corruption!_

I'm pretty sure they were getting along, whether they wanted to admit it or not. I just can't with these vampires. I closed my phone and slipped it into my purse, I just had no words for either of them. What do I even say to that?

"_There _you are," Damon suddenly appeared on my left side and I jumped, nearly tripping. He gave me an odd look. "You're ignoring my texts." His gaze tilted toward Caroline. "I need to borrow Clary…"

"Mmhm." Caroline's smile was dirty. God please don't let her say anything gross. "When you're done ravishing each other senselessly, come find me." She patted my shoulder and sauntered away, leaving me to stare after her. Why, Caroline, _why_.

I tilted my gaze up to Damon, his blue eyes fixed on my face, his expression serious. "Would you like me to ravish you first, Clarissa?" He murmured softly and my cheeks heated, my heart tripping inside my chest as my stomach flipped pleasantly. His blue eyes trapped me where I stood and my heartbeat sped up. Oh _God_.

With the way he said my name, combined with _what _he said and that stupid attractive face of his—it made me feel almost… dizzy. Damon smirked. Har har, Damon, you're frickin' hilarious.

"You can do _whatever _you'd like to me..." He snatched my wrist, my heart jerked, and his smirk grew as he planted my hand against his chest. He slowly dragged my hand around in a circle over where his nipple was. "Mmm, Clary, touch my sacred virgin body. Touch it _harder_! YES, CLARY! THERE IT IS!"

I ripped my hand away, my cheeks burning, my heart bouncing in my chest. "Goddamn it, Damon!" I wasn't sure why I was upset—maybe because I was suddenly flooded with thoughts of his _stupidly attractive _body. He was _teasing _me! Teasing this horrid boy craving demon that lived inside of me! That bitch!

"You started it," he shrugged, offering his arm which I smacked away. He rolled his eyes and pulled my arm into his, dragging me down the hall. I puffed my cheeks out, trying to cool them.

"It didn't start anything!"

"You did. You smacked my ass and then told me to sext you. This is all your fault." Damon said casually causing me to sputter. "I can't be blamed for reacting to your advances!"

"How else was I supposed to convey to you everything was okay?" I asked, wiggling my arm in his so it sat more comfortably. "I'm pretty sure you were ten seconds away from ripping someone's throat out." A strange look crossed his face and he turned to stare down at me fully.

"You knew that I was..." he trailed off awkwardly, as if he wasn't sure what to say.

"I know that you shouldn't have to be alone while being with Elena, I know that it must hurt really bad to see someone you love not being that person, and looking at you the way she does while being all over your brother." Fuck it, I was gonna be honest with him. "I also know that you're quick to get…" How do I put this? "You know… Neck-snappy when you're feeling… Y'know. Kind of rejected... Plus it was just so obvious. Literally could feel the dark mood. Rolling off you. In angry waves."

Okay this just got really awkward for me and I suddenly wished I hadn't said anything because Damon was staring at me blankly. My cheeks instantly became warm and I puffed out a breath, prodding him in the chest. He didn't move. Merely stared at me.

"It's 'cause we're buddies. It's the same reason you knew _where _I was and came to find me…" I trailed off with a frown. "And then you killed me. Because you're _that guy_. A terrible friend—you're a dick!" I realized suddenly. "Always killing me! Killing your only friend!" No reaction. "I'm just kidding, I know you kill me lovingly."

Damon squished my face between his hand, silencing me, his expression almost… _gentle_. The way he could _look _at me sometimes made me feel weak in the knees, like if his stare became anymore piercing I'd crumble to the ground under the weight of it. I wondered if it was a vampire thing.

"I won't. I won't kill you ever again, Clarissa." He said so softly I almost couldn't hear him over my fluttering heart. I pulled his hand from my face, an amused grin sliding across my face, trying to shake the dizziness from me.

"Just like how you won't compel me ever again?" I teased with a playful eye roll. "We both know you will." A faint smile tilted across his face, his fingers twitching and closing over mine effectively erasing every thought from my head.

"It shouldn't surprise me that you can read me when you're the only one who actually gives a damn about me," Damon muttered, running his thumb over my knuckles. A blanket of warmth crept over me, my heart skipping. He gently led me up stairs. "What a stupid pair we make, huh? I know the real you, and you see the real me. Fitting."

For the life of me, I couldn't concentrate on his words. I was feeling ridiculously giddy, almost loopy. I could only focus on the way his skin felt on mine, and how warm it made me. I didn't know why, but I absolutely _loved _Damon's hands. He's killed me with them, and yet on me they made me feel the most safe. Like nothing could happen to me, like everything would always be okay. Something must be terribly wrong with me—like I've got some missing screws up in my head or something. This couldn't be normal. Sexual tension is the biggest bitch in the whole wide world. I realized Damon was leading me back into that room where all the shit on loan was. His hand slid from mine and I blinked.

"Make sure nobody is coming." He said quietly and I raised my eyebrows as he sauntered into the dark room and bounced backwards. "Shit!"

"Ouch," I heard Jeremy groan. I crept into the room, peering down at my obviously drunk (or high) brother leaning against the table, sitting on the floor, looking miserable. "I'm glad to know I can be walked over like I'm an old deflated and discarded Macy's Day parade float." Deep.

"The fuck are you doing here?" Damon snapped as I smiled faintly down at Jeremy, amused.

"I don't even know anymore," Jeremy frowned, his eyes widening. "I'm _turning into a FLOAT_!" He was high as hell. Damon yanked him upward by the arms.

"You're not turning into a float," Damon assured him flatly, shoving Jeremy into me. I nearly fell over as Jeremy swayed and grinned widely at me, pulling me into a hug. Oh God.

"My favorite sister!"

"Tell him to go stand watch by the door," Damon commanded, flitting toward the a table and pulling a small wooden box out.

"You guys are up to something," Jeremy accused with a loopy grin, swaying in the doorway as I slid over to Damon curiously as he pulled apart the box.

"Damon, that is _mahogany_!" I teased and he rolled his eyes, grinning, as he pulled out a gaudy looking jewel-crystal thing. Which looked ridiculously familiar, and I wasn't sure _why_. I frowned, staring at it.

"Do you recognize it?" Damon asked quietly, his blue eyes on my face and I nodded slowly, furrowing my brow, trying to remember _why_.

"Bonnie had it…" I said slowly. "I thought my roommate was watching a scary movie, 'cause of the possession and shit but… Bonnie had it and then she wasn't Bonnie anymore—which, by the way really convenient that Katherine had a friend who Elena—"

"Clary, focus," Damon cut in swiftly. "What happened? Witchy got ahold of the necklace, and then what? She became Emily?"

"And then the necklace went _boom_." I shrugged. "That's all I remember. Like fireworks. I think. Or was that the bar of soap?" I couldn't remember. "There was this really important bar of soap…" Damon snatched my chin, forcing me to look up at him.

"Stay focused," he murmured as my heart bounced. I _was _focused! "Do you know _why _this is important? What I need it for?"

"No…" I said after a moment, my gaze dropping back to it. "No, I don't… I wasn't really watching. Something about a deal? I dunno. I just know it got blown up by magical powers." I glanced up at him, grinning. "Gonna include me in what it does?"

"She's ignoring aaaall my texts," Jeremy whined miserably, shuffling over to us and leaning against me. "She blames me for the tension between her and Tyler…" I patted his arm. "She's always my first choice, she's the only one… He can't even properly be with her 'cause his father won't approve of how she is…"

"This is disgustingly familiar," Damon frowned, looking at Jeremy oddly and I nearly laughed. "Piece of advice, love triangles only lead to death and ruin." He paused. "And then a few lifetimes of being pissed off. Like _really _pissed off."

"Are you two dating?" Jeremy demanded suddenly, narrowing his eyes. "My sister only deserves the best. You have to stop hurting her…" Jeremy hugged me tightly. "I'm sorry I'm not there for you, I'm sorry I let Damon and Tyler hurt you. I'm sorry I let you be sad. I'm the worst brother." Now I was feeling ridiculously sad. Oh goddamn it. This was overly emotional. Jeremy was suddenly yanked from me.

"I have _never _hurt Clarissa out of anger," Damon growled lowly at Jeremy, leaving me feeling nervous. I reached forward, taking Jeremy's hand and was faintly surprised when Damon let me pull Jeremy back to me. "Do _not _compare me to that Lockwood bastard. If you're sorry about being a shithead, then do her a favor and stop doing drugs. You're being an idiot. When you love someone, they shouldn't make you change who you are to be with them. If that girl is choosing _Tyler Lockwood _over you, then do yourself a favor and walk away now."

Jeremy stared at Damon seriously and slowly turned to me. "C, I'm… I'm really hungry." My lips twitched. "Man I am _so _hungry. We should get something to eat." He wandered out of the room and I tilted my head back to Damon, amused.

"You were listening in on my private conversation with Caroline."

"You guys are loud," Damon said dismissively and I grinned, shaking my head, turning to follow Jeremy. Damon's fingers curled around my wrist, and I looked back at him. "For the record, it isn't one sided." His blue eyes locked on mine and my heart stuttered in my chest. Damon shoved me out of the room and I nearly fell flat on my face. Goddamn it! I hate vampires! "We should take Jeremy home before he starts trouble. God knows I've heard enough lectures from Elena to last the rest of the month."

"Doesn't make a difference to me," I huffed, easily catching up to my high little bro. "Everything I do, and now everything Jeremy does, is _your _fault. You said so. Remember when you kicked Stefan in the shin?" Damon stared at me, almost as though he were bewildered. "And remember when you knocked the paintings off the wall?"

"…Wha—?"

I pulled an old looking painting of a sailboat off the wall causing Jeremy to burst into shrieks of laughter. Damon blinked at me, staring at the painting on the ground.

"Holy shit, Damon, calm down, man! What are you _doing_?!" I cried, kicking the painting down the hallway. Jeremy was doubling over, laughing. "You are _out of control_!"

Damon slid his gaze from the painting towards me, his head tilting slightly as he regarded me. A feral smirk crawled across his face, his blue eyes glowing mischievously. He flashed his fangs. "_Run_."

I kicked off my heels and snatched Jeremy's hand. "Run, Jeremy, run!" I grinned, dragging him down the hall with me.

"Quick, in here!" Jeremy said, pulling me into a room and slamming the door shut. "He'll never find us here!" He stumbled in the dark and I heard something crash to the floor.

"Damn it, Damon just keeps breaking things!" I said with a fake gasp of surprise. "He's so destructive!"

"I know, right?" Jeremy agreed dramatically. "He's a terrible influence on you, C! Just terrible."

The lights flicked on causing Jeremy and I to scream and hug each other. Damon stood by the door, fangs out, smirking at us evilly.

"HOW DID HE GET IN HERE?!" Jeremy cried and shoved me to the side, throwing his arms out widely. "TAAAAKE ME INSTEAD! RUUUUN, CLARE, RUUUUUN!"

"Nobody is getting out alive!" Damon cackled. "I shall have an army of newborn vampires that will sparkle in the sunlight!" He lunged at Jeremy who screamed like a girl.

"NO! ANYTHING BUT SPARKLING SKIN!" Jeremy shouted dramatically as Damon pretended to bite him. "Noooo! STAKE ME, CLARE, STAAAAAAAKE MEEEEEEE!"

I was laughing so hard that I couldn't even stand up right. I leaned against the door, clutching my stomach—and found myself falling backwards and into a body. I tilted my head up to find Bonnie looking down at me.

"Okay, this is like seven minutes in heaven gone wrong," Caroline scoffed as Bonnie helped me upright. Damon and Jeremy looked up and I realized they could be mistaken for being caught doing something _intimate_. I burst into gulls of laughter. "Like you're ravishing the _wrong _Gilbert!"

"DEREMY!" I choked out, my stomach burning from laughing so hard. "JAMON!"

"Clary don't you _dare _ship that!" Damon hissed but I was too far gone with laughing to properly reply. "Way to go Jeremy, see what your drugs have done? Your sister now has homoerotic thoughts about us! I hope you're happy where your shitty life decisions have led you!" Jeremy lost it and joined me in the laughter.

"I don't even want to know," Bonnie said, shaking her head.

"What is going on?" Elena's voice trickled in and I paused in my laughter, sliding down the wall, to look at her, and an anxious Stefan, come stumbling into the room. Elena looked from me, to Jeremy, then to Damon. "Are you guys… high?"

"I don't even know anymore," Damon deadpanned. "I think I'm turning into float."

Jeremy and I were on the floor laughing, neither one of us could calm down long enough to explain why we were laughing so hard and Elena let us know she thought we should sober up at home. Damon had assured her nobody was on drugs, but when the painting came up he let her know he was covering for me and I was a raging pothead, surprise! Jerk. Caroline said she'd catch a ride home with Bonnie and Elena, and gave me a tight hug goodbye, letting me know how rough it must be to have the hots for a gay man. Damon pointedly ignored her comment.

"Can we stop for McDonalds?" Jeremy asked from the backseat in a whine. "I'm really starving. God, I want those nuggets so baaaaaad."

"Nope." Damon said but I was kind of feeling nuggets now, too. I patted my empty stomach and Damon groaned. "Fuck. Fine. But we're eating inside. I hate you two."

"…Did he say hate or ate? Because I'm not sure if I'm up for being chow." Jeremy said, leaning forward. "I would taste awful. I'd taste like drugs. Then you'd be doing drugs. And Clare will be _so disappointed_."

"If you don't shut up, I'm going to see if you can wake up from a broken neck too." Damon threatened cheerfully and I frowned.

"Dick." Jeremy muttered, plopping back.

Have you ever been to McDonalds dressed in classy party clothes? Well, me either. I left my heels somewhere in the car and happily skipped around the mostly empty McDonalds with Jeremy who had his tie around his head. Not really sure why.

"And truth be told I miiiiiiiisss you," I sang along to the song playing quietly over the speakers. "And truth be told I'm _LYING_!" Suck it, old life! Jeremy grinned, linking arms with me, and spinning us around.

"WHEN YOU SEEEE MY FACE, HOPE IT GIVES YOU HEEEEEEEEEELL! HOPE IT GIVES YOU HEEEEEEEEELL!" He sang with me. "When you walk my waaaay, hope it gives you heeeeell! Hope it gives you heeeeeeell! When you find a man that's worth a damn and treats you well, then he's a foooool, you're just as well! Hope it gives you hell!"

"Nooow you'll never see," we sang loudly together. "What you've done to me! You can take back your memories, they're no good to me! And here's all your lies, you can look me in the eyes with the sad, sad look that you wear so well! Wheen you see my face, hope it gives you heeeeell!"

Damon looked unimpressed by our beautiful singing and shoved a large cup into my hands. My eyes went wide, a large, giddy, grin flew across my face and I looked up at him. Was he serious?

"She's not allowed…" Jeremy began, I threw him a crushed look, and then he shrugged. "Screw it. Have soda, Clare! Have all the soda you want! Who cares if it's nine o'clock at night?"

"Right on, little man." Damon grinned, tossing him a large cup as well. I flew to the fountain drinks. "Screw the rules!"

"No take backs," I declared, shoving the cup under the coke and pressing the button. It was all for me.

Thirty minutes later, and we were casually still hanging out in a booth. I had made Jeremy and Damon share one side so I could stretch my legs across the length of mine, my back against the wall. Jeremy had left to use the _little boy's room_, and I was staring distractedly at the nuggets.

"I keep expecting to wake up," I murmured quietly, dipping one of the nuggets. I wasn't really hungry anymore, I just liked making messes. "I keep counting the days of being in this place, rather than just…" I looked up at Damon, smiling faintly. "But I'm really free, huh? I can do whatever I want…"

"Next time Mrs. Lockwood throws a stupid party, show up in a red Minnie Mouse like dress. You know, red, with white polka-dots." Damon grinned at me. "It'll be obnoxious and loud. Hell, I'll dress to match you. We'll see how long it takes for someone to ask us to leave."

I snorted. "Maybe I should." The smile tilted from my face. "It's crazy, but the only thing I really _miss_… is the city. It's so dark and quiet here."

"Then let's go." Damon shrugged a shoulder upward and I blinked, confused. Let's go? "It's only a… five to six hour drive. We can leave right now. Be back before you have school on Monday."

"…Really?" I stared at him, trying to comprehend what he was _saying _to me. He merely stared back at me and my heart leap excitedly, a smile flying across my face. "Are you serious, D? You'd take me to the city?"

A faint grin slid across his handsome face. "I'm impulsive as hell, Claryberry, and it'll ruin Stefan's entire weekend." I didn't even _care _if he was using this as a way to get at his brother, I beamed at him. His grin twitched wider. "It's really no big deal."

"It's _everything_!" I gushed, sitting up straight and bouncing a little in the booth. "Really? You'd really take me, Damon? Really?"

"Mmhm."

An excited strangled noise came out of my throat. "You're the fucking best, Damon." He merely smirked at me.


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, not even Clarissa.

So a REALLY REALLY big thank you to every who reviewed last chapter and this chapter: vikki. dillard, Ooo a jellybean, CalmDisposition, flazzy cullen, RosesMoon, DGfleetfox, MelissaIsLame, Chaos-and-Insanity, CacklingBlasphemy, Cara, 1llu510n, Guest, eloise, ty, Guest, Courtney, karmen238, XxxBrEnDaxxX, Elex Black, xXxElizabeth MikaelsonxXx, Szinia, Guest, Bee, FalconHQ, bridgetzombie, Guesty, MadelineT, ADORATIO, Britt, Randomreader, xXbriannaXx, MrsMusicAddict, Lorelai Sofia Petrova, Tuggy08, Vanessa, RealHuntress18, Bookworm543, rachellaurenm, Angi Marie, jolisa, ILittleLamb, AlexHide, omg, lacy, SomebodyWhoCares. You guys really motivate me!

Last week I was in a huge hurry, so I didn't really get to explain the whole dream thing in the beginning of chapter 9. Damon's been stuck in this dark place in his mind but having Clarissa show up in his dream/nightmare is his subconscious realizing things are kind of shifting for him. Clarissa represented the happiness that Damon has been avoiding. Hovering in the back of his mind which he found bothersome but now things are changing for him. lol I dunno.

If anyone is curious as to how Clarissa dresses, I made a polyvore: noticemewithery . polyvore. There's a link in my profile, too.

* * *

It took me an all of five minutes to bounce out of that dumb dress and wiggle into a pair of flare jeans and throw on a baggy shirt with a mustache and sunglasses on it. I had, for a split second, thought about getting cute and wearing a skirt. But given I was going to spend the weekend with Damon, wearing a skirt was probably a terrible idea. I always ended up sprawled ungracefully on the ground after being shoved, or landing myself in an odd (and sometimes kind of intimate) positions with him. I told a half asleep Jeremy that I was leaving and texted Jenna to let her know I was spending the weekend with a friend. Mostly so I had all my bases covered and she couldn't ground me. Or call the cops. And then I figured, hell, Caroline was my BFF so I texted her too, letting her know I was spending the weekend in the city with Damon.

"That was fast," Damon mused as I threw myself into the passenger seat. I beamed at him.

"I'm excited. And on sugar. Shit, should we wait a few hours? You'll be trapped in the car with me and I've had soda!" I realized, my eyes widening and Damon scoffed, starting the car.

"We're leaving now. Before you change your mind." Damon stated and I wondered how the hell he could ever think I'd change my mind. "You also didn't drink that much soda—and if this is you hyper, I think I can handle it just fine. I actually _like _you all bouncy and Clare-y. Hence your nickname." I smiled at him happily. Aw, Damon's such a little friggin' charmer.

"I'm conditioned to drink a little—just enough to hit the craving, you know?" I bounced excitedly in the seat. "Mother would be _mortified _if I acted so..." I waved my hand about airily. "Undignified. _Ladies _should be seen, not heard, Damon! Ha!" His blue eyes slid in my direction.

"We're going to kill that part of you this weekend." Damon said pleasantly. "You're not Clarissa Everett, you're not Clarissa Gilbert. You're just Clary. You can do whatever the _hell_ you want." My heart bounced with my glee, and he tilted his head to throw me a smirk. "And you can feed into your _cravings_ as long as you have no objects to me feeding into _mine_."

I snorted, wiggling around in the seat and grinning at him. "Mmm, Damon, don't flatter me into thinking _I_ have any say in what you do," I teased happily and he glanced at me again.

"I'm a respectable host, Claryberry," Damon huffed as though deeply offended. "Of _course _you have a say, it's _your _weekend."

"Our weekend," I grinned causing surprise to flicker across his expression. "It's _our _weekend." I repeated, firmly. "Free from Stefan. Free from being a pretend Gilbert. Free from what everybody wants us to be, what they expect us to be! You can do whatever the hell _you _want, D!"

Damon grinned at me, which lit me up inside with how his blue eyes glowed almost excitedly at me in the darkness. "You are the _best _person to go on a road trip with." He announced and obviously! Of course I am!

"Duh, it's _me_." I smiled brightly. "I'm the friggin' best thing in the entire world. And so are _you_! Nobody has ever said fuck it and spontaneously decided to drive a few hours to the city just because _I _miss it. I mean, yeah, it'll give your brother hell and…" I trailed off as the text alert on my phone chimed happily. I pulled it out.

Caroline: _what city_

I bounced, texting: _NYC! ! ! ! yyyeeEAAAHHH GANGSTA LYF 5-EVR_

"It's Care," I said happily, feeling his stare. His curious stare! "I told her gangster life five-ever."

"Five-ever?" Damon repeated, sounding slightly inquisitive. That was the great thing about Damon! He didn't care if I talked like a spastic person, and he had no problem adding the words I spewed out to his vocabulary. Like a true pal.

"Well, you're already doing _forever _and I felt like I needed to one up you." I shrugged as my phone burst into jingling.

Caroline: _omfg you had soda its like 10pm!_

Caroline: _wait r u srs?_

Caroline: _hes taking u 2 nyc?_

Caroline: _4 the weekend?_

Caroline: _beter come bak a woman LOL no but srsly will cover 4 u if need it! MAKE ME PROUD_

I texted her back quickly: _you can tell elena but if jenna asks im wit u and we'll see ;)))))))_

* * *

"So you'll be okay driving the whole way to the city?" I asked. It was about forty minutes in, and the sugar high was winding down but the excitement of being in the city again had me pretty giddy still.

"Mmhm, I'll be fine," Damon assured lazily. "If I get tired we can always switch." He paused and grinned mockingly at me as I stared back at him flatly. "Oh. That's right. You can't drive. Ever. You've been _compelled_!" Ha. Ha. Hilarious.

"Jokes on you, I don't even _want _to drive." I huffed as he took the next exit.

"That's the compulsion talking, sweetcheeks." Damon told me pleasantly. _Sweetcheeks_? Damon's such a little jerk.

"Hey if you fall asleep at the wheel and crash the car, _that'll _be _your _fault." I shrugged my shoulders. "And then you'll mourn your car and never forgive yourself."

"It'll indirectly be your fault and I'll blame you." Damon shot back. "And no amount of couples therapy will ever fix the damage."

"Our marriage will be in ruins," I agreed solemnly. "Better get some energy drinks. Or blood. Bloody energy drinks. Too bad vampires aren't mainstream. It bet they'd have some crazy energy drinks marketed to you suckers."

"People can't even handle their own kind who have a different sexuality than them, what makes you think they'd be okay with the undead walking around?" Damon looked thoughtful and I was struck with how horribly true that was. "Though mixing redbull and blood isn't something I've done before…" He pulled into a brightly lit gas station and was opening my door before I realized he'd moved. Damon offered his hand, smirking at me. "Time to load up on road trip snacks. We'll be in the car for five hours. Or six. …Maybe seven…" he trailed off as I hopped out of the car, his gaze sliding down. "Are you wearing _bellbottoms_?"

"They're called flare jeans now, D." Did he say we'd be in the car for _seven hours_? I frowned and he frowned back at me. "Seven hours?"

"When did _those _come back into style?"

"The last forty minutes was hell," I whined as I followed him into the gas station, flatly ignoring his mocking question. "I don't know if I could survive seven hours. Or six hours. Or even five." Oh God, my max was two hours! And that was with frequent stops! Damon rolled his eyes at me and tapped the tip of my nose with a finger.

"I'm confident in my ability to keep you entertained." Damon pulled my camera out of God knows where and flashed a picture. I blinked, momentarily blinded. "I figured you'd want to document every damn second of this little trip." I brightened excitedly. I hadn't even _thought _to take it!

"Oh my God!" I gushed happily, taking it from him. "When did you… Wait, when did you get this?"

He shrugged, swiping a small red shopping basket up and shoving it into my arms. "While you were falling on your ass trying to get out of your dress." I stared at him in open shock. Damon smirked.

He needed a bell. Like one of those giant ones attached to a choker. Like what Neko cosplayers wear. My heart tripped in my chest as the mental image of him wearing a black collar with a leash attached and no shirt on came to mind. I choked, my cheeks heating, and Damon stared at me with his stupidly attractive face and his pretty blue eyes. He tilted his head, and my imagination took off. Strawberries were involved and I squeaked, spinning around quickly. Why?!

"What the hell was that?" He easily caught up to me and I fanned my cheeks, giving him a moody look. His lips twitched into a knowing smirk that made me feel dizzy. "Fantasizing about me?" Damon's voice dipped into a purr, his smirk stretching across his handsome face as he leaned closer to me. I sucked a breath in. "God, you want me sooooo bad. What were we _doing_? Come on, you have to share. It involved me, so I have the right to know." He spoke in a soft, captivating, voice that made me want to tell him everything, those blue eyes of his gleaming wickedly.

This goddamn vampire bitch. Stupid Damon.

I angrily threw random candy into the basket. "You were a kitty eating strawberries." I blurted out. Damon's smug look fell into confusion.

"_What_?"

"_Yuuup_. With the clip on ears, and the collar with the bell and a leather leash…" I trailed off, suddenly amused by it. I grinned as he stared back at me, baffled. "I think you'd take the role of sub pretty well."

Damon blinked at me. "You're not turning this around on me." He refused flatly. "There is no way in hell I'd ever be the submissive one."

"You said I could do _whatever _I wanted to you." I reminded him pleasantly and his eyes widened. "I'd make you my little kitty bitch and if you behaved you'd be allowed to have a strawberry. Which I'd feed to you. Maybe."

Damon opened and closed his mouth a few times, like he didn't know what to say. Ha! "_You'd _be the kitty. I'm the dominate one—and _especially _since you're the little blush-y virgin!" I threw more sugary snacks into the basket.

"Mmhm, whatever you want to believe, D." This was so much fun!

"It's a _fact_, Clarissa. All I have to do is _this,_" he lightly slid his fingers over my cheek and my heart stuttered inside my chest. "And you react like _that_." That meant he could hear my heart, didn't it? Damon smirked, as though he'd _won_. "You'd be wearing the kitty outfit and I'd be leading you around on the leash." He bent his head, his mouth nearly brushing against my cheek and I desperately tried to keep still, to focus, as a pulse of excitement bounced through me. "You'd willingly listen to my _every _command." His breath was warm against my skin and I ignored the dizziness that tumbled through me.

There was no way he was winning this.

"But Damon," I lightly pressed my fingers against his chest, and he let me push him back. I flashed him a sweet smile. "You want me _more_. And you'll do _anything _to get me to give up my Disney true love virtues to have wild vampire sex with you."

A look of surprise flickered across his expression so quickly I nearly missed it. He looped an arm around my waist and pulled me flush against him, my knees nearly giving out as my body jolted. A strange, almost electric, heat flooded me and I struggled with breathing as my heart scattered in my chest. Damon's blue eyes spilled across me, sweeping me up, making it so there was only _him_ and nothing else. Damon was truly _beautiful_, with his jet black hair and his shocking blue eyes—I never wanted to look at anybody else, ever again. I gazed up at him, breathlessly, dizzier, my heart humming loudly against my ribcage, so aware of every inch of me that was pressed against him. His warm thumb slowly caressed the inside of my wrist sending a shiver of heat up my arm from where his skin met mine. I realized, in a daze, that he was stroking where my pulse fluttered erratically.

"Maybe you're right," his voice was low, soft, curling around me so that he was the only thing that existed. "Maybe I would play submissive if _you _wanted me to be." I had only said it to throw him for a loop, I had only said it to be playful. And now I could only stare up at him. "But I will _never _do anything to make you give up _anything_, Clarissa. Never you." How was it that Damon words could render me completely useless? My stomach was ablaze of nerves and fluttering. "If your… Disney shit is important to you, than it's important to me, I guess. I don't know. But I wouldn't trick you into anything, force you to compromise anything, you… I…" A conflicted, almost _confused_, look flickered, his blue eyes drinking me in.

"I know." I breathed. "You're my blue canary. You're the only one I've ever trusted so completely." I didn't care if he didn't like it when I talked like that, I didn't care if he wanted to pretend he was the king of vampire dickery. There was nobody like Damon, nobody who made me feel like he did. He didn't get angry, or annoyed or try to deflect with a sarcastic joke. Instead, his expression tilted and he looked… almost...

"_Fiiiighting evil by moonlight_," my phone burst out ringing, breaking the odd daze I'd been in. I pulled back from Damon, suddenly remembering where we were. I felt disoriented. Shit. "_Winning love by daylight! Never running from a real fight! She's the one named Sailor Moon!_"

"Stefan," I mumbled in surprise, pulling out my ringing phone. Damon furrowed his brow. "It's his ringtone. The fuck is he doing calling me at almost 11pm?"

"_She will never turn her back on a friend, she is always there to defend!_"

Damon pulled the phone from me, flipping it open and bringing it to his ear. The whatever between us that just occurred was long gone, and his lips were flitted into a feral smirk. "Steeefan," he greeted almost maliciously. "Calling my Claryberry so _laaate_. What would _Elena _think?" His blue eyes were gleaming with wicked mischief. "Mm. No. You can't. Because she hates you." He rolled his eyes, and grinned at me. "Of course she's safe, she's with _me_. Mmhm." He gasped, as though offended. "Why, Stef, we've _run _off together! We're in _love _and getting eloped! Wish me luck, little brother! We're jumping _straight _to the baby making process!" He snapped my phone shut, _pocketing it_, and grinned at me widely. "Stefan is throwing the biggest tantrum."

I grinned back at him. "Should've told him that we were playing hide and seek." I picked up the basket I didn't remember dropping. "If I was a vampire, I'd play hide and seek like that. With your vamp speed and ability to hear and see shit—oh God, and all the time in the world. It would be _so much fun_."

"Why does _Stefan _get his own special ringtone?" Damon demanded suddenly, plucking up cookies from the shelf and looking at them.

"Everybody gets their own ringtone, it's so I know who is calling and can either ignore or search for my phone." It was genius, really. "Stefan gets the one about being a sailor scout because it fits who he is. He fights his evil nature to go ripper during the night, while he woos Elena during the day." Damon was looking at me curiously, tossing the cookies into the basket to my delight. He pulled his phone out.

"_So be prepared for the coup of the century,_" my phone rang from inside his pocket, slightly muffled. "_Be prepared for the murkiest scam! Meticulous planning, tenacity spanning, decades of denial, is simply while I'll be the king undisputed, respected and saluted_—" Damon ended the call and looked at me with his eyebrows raised.

"Lion King? _Really_?" He frowned, obviously not pleased.

"Last week it was Spooky Skeletons. Now it's Be Prepared. I thought it was clever, since you've got your Damon Dickery scheme going on." I shrugged, unapologetic. He could deal with it. _I _thought it was awesome and that's all that mattered. Damon was staring at me like he was suddenly unsure why he hung around me. Pfft.

After dumping a butt load of sugary drinks into the basket and paying (just kidding, Damon compelled the cashier), we threw everything into the car and Damon was looking indecisive over whether or not he should get his blood fix here or somewhere else. He was leaning against his car and I was bouncing on my heels.

"Well… this looks like a pretty…" I trailed off, trying to figure out how to word this, as I took another glorious sip from my now open Pepsi bottle. I delighted in the rush as the sugar swam through me, and nearly sighed in lazy happiness. "You know, not often visited gas station. You could go after the cashier, nobody would find him for a while. And I'm not gonna lie. You're my vamp BFF, which means I'm totally up for burying a body, but it'd be a serious mood killer." Actually I'd probably burst into tears if I had to bury a body. Damon was smirking, clearly amused.

"I don't _kill _everyone I feed from. C-F-E, Clary. Compel, feed, erase. I can go on my merry way happily, and they can go on not being dead." He said cheerfully and curiosity spilled through me.

"Oooh, and is that what you meant by feeding into your craving?" Amusement suddenly burst across me and I grinned at him. "Like, what? When we get to the city, you gonna grab someone and cart them around with us? Like, excuse me everybody, I just need a quick drink, don't mind me!"

Damon's face broke into amused happiness, a smile stretching across his face. "Yeah, something like that." Damon's life was so _outrageous_ and a wonderful idea popped into mind.

"I have just the place for you, and I bet you no compulsion will be needed." I grinned widely, giddy as shit. "Have you ever visited the vampire subculture in New York? People who take on the vampire lifestyle have these _bars_…"

"Oh Clary," Damon's grin turned predatory. "You _have _to show me." He leaned closer and I beamed up at him. "Grab me a redbull, I'm going to try out your blood and energy drink idea."

"Should I get napkins?" I asked, crawling into the car and digging through the drink bag.

"Ha-ha," he muttered dryly. "I'm not always a messy eater, Clary. I actually can be very dignified." I'm _sure_. Cause chowing down on someone's neck was _dignified_. I pulled out the redbull and bounced after him. "Would it upset you if I asked you to lure him out here?" He looked at me curiously and I puffed out a breath. Seriously?

"As long as I'm not leading him to his violent death, I guess I could." I said after a moment, taking another swing of the soda. The sugar crackled through me and I was feeling more _everything_. "Hold this. Don't _take _any. I need it. I need all of it." Damon rolled his eyes as I pranced into the gas station. Oh my God, was I really doing this?

I mean, I guess I already had a one way ticket to hell to begin with. But shit. I never thought I'd ever land myself here.

…Hello horrible new life.

"Hiii," I smiled sweetly up at the scrawny looking red headed guy. "Um, do you guys have a bathroom here?" He nodded.

"Yeah, here, I'll give you the key." He said kindly and I was totally feeling guilty. Oh shit, man. But Damon said he wouldn't kill him, so… I grinned sheepishly.

"Could you, uh… walk me there? The dark kind of gives me the jitters…" I smiled hopefully and he faltered.

"Well… I… I shouldn't leave the register… a customer might come or…" he shifted, looking like he very much wanted to agree to help me. Aw. This guy was so nice.

"It'll take two seconds, I swear," I lied, jutting my lower lip out. "My…" what should I say Damon was? "Brother is in the car, and he's being a real jerk and won't walk me there. I'm really freaked, so, pleaaaase? Please?"

"Okay," he agreed with a faint smile. "Sure." I am _so _sorry.

"Thanks!" I'm such a terrible person. Especially as the guilt was becoming less and less. Yup. Going to hell. Straight to hell. Maybe not. Maybe I won't mind going to hell. Ugh.

I followed him out of the gas station. "So you guys going somewhere?" The guy, bless him, attempted to make friendly conversation as he led me around the back of the gas station.

"Uh-huh."

"Well, I hope you guys get there alright," he said warmly, pulling the key out to unlock a black door which undoubtedly led to a horrible bathroom. Damon appeared so suddenly I nearly shrieked, bouncing backwards as he threw the redbull and Pepsi at me (which I fumbled and was lucky to fucking catch both of them, asshole). "Shit!" The guy swore, and laughed. "You nearly scared me to death." _Ugh_.

"You're not going to be afraid, and you won't try to run." There goes Damon, being a fucking vampire creep and compelling his victim. His blue eyes flickered to me. "Are you staying to watch?" His fangs glinted in the bad lighting and for a breath of a moment, Damon looked terrifying.

"Staying to watch?" The guy frowned. "I'm not gay…"

"What? No. I'm going to drink your _blood_." Damon growled. "I'm not _gay _either. Do I come off as gay?" His expression tilted toward questioning and he squinted his blue eyes.

"Well…" the guy shrugged a shoulder, not even reacting the whole drinking blood part. Fucking compulsion. "You could be. You're very pretty."

"Right?" I agreed with a nod. "It could really go either way with him."

"It's the way you present yourself, you know how to look good without even trying." The gas station cashier added and I smiled happily. Damon looked a little flattered.

"Be polite, Damon. The man just complimented you twice. Say thank you." I encouraged and Damon threw me a look over his shoulder. A look that said I better shut up. I wasn't going to.

"Manners are important." The cashier said. "I feel like nobody has them anymore."

"Hey, man, I'm really sorry I tricked you to be vampire dinner." I said honestly and he smiled at me.

"It's okay. I knew it was too good to be true, pretty girls like you don't acknowledge guys like me." He said and he might as well just pour more friggin' salt into the wound. "I admit I'm a little hurt. I'm not going to die, am I?"

"You will if you don't _shut up_." Damon groaned. "Now hold still." He dipped his head lower and I winced for the cashier guy whose expression remained completely blank. Like he didn't even _realize _it was hurting him. Or maybe he did, and Damon had just compelled him. Did I mention how much I hate compulsion?

And God, this was awkward, just standing here in silence while Damon drank from some guy. Which could be taken in a vampire or gay way. Pfft.

"When I was little I had these picture books my mother given me on how to have proper etiquette for while attending dinners," I said, rocking on my heels. "Like which foods to eat, which utensils to use, where to sit and who to sit by—that sort of stuff. Like it even told me what to say and how to bring it up, properly, if the person next to you has food in their teeth. Horrible books. But maybe they make some for vampires. Like when they're feeding. Do you think there's like a class of vampires who are the equivalent of stuffy rich people?" I was rambling. "Okay JR vampire, this is how you properly feed on this person we just kidnapped amongst very important vampire company."

Damon snorted, and lifted his head to look at me. "Fuck, Clary, shut the hell up, I'm trying to _eat_. Goddamn it."

"I'm just sayin'." I shrugged. "It could be important."

He was clearly amused even if he was trying to act pissy at me. "Throw me the redbull." I sighed and threw it at him, which he caught easily. He opened the can, bit into the poor cashier guy, and then brought the can to his mouth, tilting it back. I looked at him, curiously, as he lowered the can, licking his lips and smirking. "That…" he breathed, his blue eyes so very bright. "Was a kick. It's like getting punched in the mouth in a really, really, good way. I _liked _that. Too bad I said I wouldn't kill you…" he pouted.

Oh my GOD, he was actually _pouting_, his lower lip was puffed out and it was fucking adorable! He played with the cashier's collar, hiking it up as though he were… hiding the bite mark? Why was I finding this just so freakin' precious?

"You're not going to remember any of this. You will _especially _forget Clary, she never walked into the gas station." Damon grinned widely, wiggling his fingers at the guy and I frowned. Why couldn't he remember meee? "Bye-bye!" Damon took another long swing from the redbull and then crushed the now empty can, tossing it to the side as he flitted to me. "Ready, my Claryberry?" Damon asked happily, slinging his arm over my shoulders and leading me back to the car.

I beamed at him. "Do you think I should've taken a picture with the three of us? Memories are _important_."

Damon was grinning wickedly. "Speaking of documenting horrific deeds, I've got a terrible story to tell you about Stefan."

* * *

Truth be told, evil Stefan scared me shitless. Like, _really _scared me. Damon's told me, in horrific detail, about Stefan's days as a ripper and how he'd literally rip someone's head off because he was so freakin' addicted to the blood. I've even had nightmares about Stefan going ripper and chasing me—though, I strongly suspected Damon had a hand in those dreams. I was slumped in the seat, ankles crossed up on the dashboard, the cookies open between us.

"That is some Criminal Minds psycho shit right there," I said with a frown. "He kept a _list _of his victims names? God, Stefan is seriously fucked in the head. I bet he got off on it and wanted to relive their deaths. Ugh, that is so fucking…"

"Mmhm," Damon snatched the cookie from my hand. Rude.

"How do you even know that, though?" Damon seemed to know an awful a lot about Stefan's activities throughout the years.

"I was around." Damon dismissed and I raised my eyebrows. Uh _huh_, I'm sure he freakin' was.

"You were keeping tabs on your little bro." I grinned, opening another redbull and passing it to him. Damon was glowering at me. "Don't get veiny eyes at me, vampy. You might want to inflict as much bodily harm to him as possible, which I totally get, and you might be pissed to hell, but at the end of the day, he's still your brother. And you're still his. You can't hide it from me. I see it. I see _everything_." I held the cookie out in front of me. "I can see into the infinite void of ultimate wisdom." Damon grabbed my hand and squeezed so hard that the cookie broke apart and I frowned. "Ouch, what the hell?"

"And that's how the cookie crumbles." He deadpanned, staring at me flatly. Damon's a real side splitting comedian. Freakin' hilarious.

* * *

An hour and forty-five minutes in and I was still doing okay. I guess Damon hadn't been kidding about being able to keep me entertained. Or had compelled me at some point in time. Either way, I was working on my second Pepsi and bag of peanut butter M&Ms.

"If you had to choose," Damon was saying, extremely amused, and I wasn't sure if this was him _hyper _or not. He had a few redbulls. "Who would you pick?"

"Shit, D…" I chewed on my lower lip. "I guess… I guess Caroline. I'd pick Caroline." Damon actually looked surprised.

"But she's your favorite." Damon raised his eyebrows. "Aside from _Pretend Brother_ of course. You are one cold chick."

"I'm not _cold_, I was thinking at a logical angle!" I defended myself and Damon laughed.

"You and logic." As if it were an impossible pair!

"Fine I'll explain. Bonnie is a witch, and while right now she's useless as shit, you might need her in the future to do witchy things. You wouldn't be able to kill Elena, I mean, because of the Katherine factor—but say, God knows why, you can. Stefan would probably go ripper and it wouldn't be good." I winced at the idea of it. He'd probably go after me first. "Caroline, as much as I adore her, is useless. She has no real purpose. There wouldn't be much of a backlash."

"Awww," he patted the top of my head. "You could be a little killer." Nope.

"And you're playing the game wrong, it isn't which out of these three would you kill. It's marry, fuck _and _kill. That's why there's three of them." I pointed out, swatting his hand away. "And now it's my turn."

"I would fuck and then kill. There would be no marriage." Damon huffed and I huffed back. We weren't gonna play this game, then!

* * *

"No, then I left her on the roof." Damon shrugged and I snorted, nearly choking on the sour gummy worm.

"Hey, you know I'll always have your back, even if I disagree with you. But we're buddies, so I can tell you plainly, _total _dick move. You don't use the feels to trick people, D." I said, wagging the gummy worm at him. He knocked it from my hand rudely. "I'll write her an apology letter. Sorry I'm a toolbag XOXO Damon, PS. Roof sex?"

"Make sure to sprinkle a lot of glitter onto the letter so she really knows I mean it." Damon deadpanned and I grinned widely.

"I was planning on writing it on Disney stationary. Nothing says apologetic murderous vampire like purple paper and Minnie Mouse."

"Mmhm, we can pick up pink gel pens."

A wider grin slid across my face. This was one of the reasons why I liked Damon so much. He gave none of the fucks, he was one of the only people who'd joke around like this with me. I settled back in the seat, looking at him in the darkness. He was just so _pretty_, nobody compared to him. Everything was so much better with him, even the bad. How could anyone have him and want anything else? Or anyone else?

"I just can't imagine it..." I murmured and his blue eyes found mine. "And I know KP is a sensitive topic…"

"We're calling Katherine KP now?" He looked faintly amused which I ignored because I was in the middle of a speech and nicknames were my thing.

"I just can't comprehend it, D. I really can't. And it's mindboggling 'cause I don't even have the romantic feels for you, but if I did, how could there be anything else? 'Cause as it is now, I don't even like sharing your attention." There was something about Damon that made me feel completely at ease with telling him anything. That and the sugar made me feel like I could do _anything _as it was. Dangerous combination, but I couldn't stop talking. "Legit, I was totally jealous when Care and you switched numbers. I _never _get jealous. But you're _myyy_ vampire and I don't wanna _shaaaare_ or have you do vampire dickery with anyone else…" I trailed off with a whine, feeling almost awkward at admitting so much. I jutting my lip out into a pout to make things less serious, and a large grin split across Damon's face, his blue eyes gleaming.

"You were _jealous_?" He asked delightedly, as if that was the greatest thing ever. I frowned at him. Did he seriously ignore my amazing speech to just focus on that? "I wasn't really sure what you were—then I thought you were just feeling _guilty_, but jealous?" And noooow he looked smug.

What the hell did he have to look so smug for? I threw gummies at him causing that smug little grin to grow and I'm sad to say he was even more attractive when he was being an ass. Goddamn it.

"The _point_ I'm trying to make is I don't know how KP could have you and want anything else."

Damon's grin turned sarcastic. "Mm. Well. That's _KP _for you… She was entitled and she could have _whatever _she wanted. And she wanted both of us. So… There you go. You know the story in depth, Clary." He sighed. "That's how the real world works, it's not at all like your Disney and true love or any of what you believe. It's horrible and painful and bitter." I frowned.

"I don't need true love to know that you'll always come first." I huffed, wiggling in the seat to get more comfortable. His blue eyes were on me. "If you want I can wear shirts that say Damon's Number One. Man too bad I wasn't there, I would've helped you out, D."

Damon's amusement was back full swing. "You, in the 1860s? That would have been horrifying…"

I made a face. "No it wouldn't have. I know how to be ladylike!"

"Katherine and you…" he trailed off, looking suddenly thoughtful. His blue eyes flickered back to me. "You two would've _really _gotten along. Oh, _God_. She was fun, and her philosophy in life—no rules. You would've clicked. And plotted. And done horrible, rebellious, things and Stefan and I would probably just be _dead_."

There was no way in hell I would've liked Katherine. Not with how she continuously hurt Damon.

"Great D, it would've just been a clusterfuck of love 'cause I'm sure she'd compel me to join in and then it'd be vampire four ways forever." I deadpanned and Damon choked, the car suddenly jerking violently to the right. I screeched, flailing into the window. "Shit, D, I was _kidding_! I was making a joke! I know that the whole sharing thing gave you hell, it was in bad taste!"

He flung me a look. "I wouldn't let her have you, I wouldn't ever let her ruin you." I was shocked by how chilling his voice became, how protective. He groaned. "Not—not that I could have done much but anything she wanted. It was impossible to say no to those brown eyes... And you wouldn't… have liked me. At all. I was respectable and sweet and gentlemanly. I wanted to get married and have a lot of kids. And then I saw Katherine and it was so _instant_ and passionate and I didn't care, I was willing to die for her. And then I _did_." He laughed humorlessly. "Only to see that Stefan had too." I grabbed his hand and he stared back at me, expressionlessly. I just wanted to take it all away, make it better, and I wasn't sure how.

"I'd like you always, no matter who you are or how you act or what you do. Because you're _Damon _and I dunno, it's just _you_." I told him. "To hell with love. Look at what it does? My mother, your Katherine, they did it all wrong. We're gonna be happy, because you and I… we're the greatest two people _ever_, and we're gonna live it up. No rules but our own, and the whole world can burn and watch us."

Damon's lips twitched upward and he intertwined our fingers. My heart bounced. His grin flickered into a smirk. We sat in silence for a few minutes, his thumb soothingly running over the back of my hand.

"I had promised Stefan on his tenth birthday I'd take him to the saloon. A bar, really. Things were a lot different back then, and to Stefan turning the first double digits was a _big _thing." Damon laughed softly, looking like he was a million miles away. "He got… _really _drunk after two shots, and I let him know he was a man now. He was so _thrilled_, it was so dumb, but it made me happy too. We didn't get moments like that much anymore, since Father was becoming more demanding that Stefan be a better man than I and I was leaving for University soon… I was afraid I'd come back to a clone of Father and I just wanted him to remember the good times between us. Anyway, we got home and Stefan couldn't walk straight worth for shit. He ended up knocking over a very expensive vase. He was so frightened, he burst into tears and I… Well, I always took the blame for him. Rather Father be furious with me, than him, see Stefan as the saintly child between us…"

Only Damon seemed to possess the ability to keep me still, my attention completely his, even when on sugar and trapped in a small car. There was something about how he spoke, lost in memories, his voice soft, a faint smile on his face that had me completely enthralled. That and the three weeks I've known him, this was the second time he's told me about his life in the 1800s. First time he's told me anything about his _human _life that didn't include Katherine. I mean he's told me about his Father but mostly to compare him to my mother.

* * *

It was 4AM, we were in Jersey, and I had to friggin' pee so bad I was about ready to burst. I was bouncing up and down, whining, Damon clearly taking his sweet freakin' ass time. Like he wanted to freakin' _stroll _to the rest stop.

"Damon," I tugged at his hand, trying to pull him faster toward the building. "Every time I move I feel an ocean of pee sloshing through me!"

"We should have stopped sooner," he smirked darkly at me, obviously delighting in my misery.

"I've been begging you for an hour!" I stressed and Damon's blue eyes glowed wickedly at me. He easily threw me against him with a slight flick of his wrist and I gasped as he curled his arms around me.

"I so love it when I have you begging," he growled lowly and I was like eighty percent sure I was about to pee myself. I whined in misery, shoving against his chest and running toward the building.

You know when you go pee and it's like such a fucking relief you get tears in your eyes? Yeah, it was that kind of pee.

"Are you _moaning_?"

I screamed and nearly fell off the toilet. Damon's laughter echoed throughout the empty restroom and it was terrifying. It was like one of those evil chuckles right before the killer strikes. God FUCKING damn it, Damon.

"Why are you in here?!" I cried, my cheeks hot. For the love of God, he better not come into the stall. Or peek over.

"Because to leave your side, even for a single moment, would be agony." He deadpanned but I totally knew he was smirking. I hate vampires. HATE them.

"You suck!" I huffed and he laughed that evil laugh.

"I do." He agreed pleasantly.

I kicked open the stall and strolled out, Damon was leaning against the sinks, grinning at me. "My business is done!" I announced, throwing my hands up, quoting Invader Zim and Damon _stared_. Clearly questioning why we hung out. "Because Damon," I said, prancing over to the sink and bumping my hip against his, forcing him to scoot over so I could wash my hands. "You want this human virgin ass so bad you'll put up with my spastic behavior! That's why!"

"I didn't say anything!"

"You did," I said seriously. "I could feel the regret of knowing me, the questioning. I can feel it because we are one, Damon. Spiritually. We are _one_."

"I'm leaving you here." Damon huffed and I gasped, but found myself alone in the bathroom.

"Nooooo!" I wailed, pretending to be crestfallen. "You said five-ever!"

Damon appeared to the left of me suddenly, grinning widely. "I did, didn't I? Five-ever is such a _looong _time." I beamed at him.

"Damon! You've returned!" I gushed happily, flinging my arms around his neck in a fit of hyper, gleeful, excitement.

I felt the surprise spring through him—so maybe throwing my arms around him was a bad idea, whoops! I began to pull away but his arms quickly flew around me and my heart bounced giddily as he lifted me off the ground in a spinning hug. A beaming grin burst across my face as my feet touched the ground. Damon tilted his head, his gaze was tender despite the smirk on his face and my smile grew.

"Sorry, you just make me so happy that I couldn't help myself," I blurted and his blue eyes brightened.

"The Clarissa who has to contain herself or resist urges is _dead _now, Clary," Damon murmured. "Whatever you want to say or do, you can. That's how it…" he fell silent as I buried my face into his chest, sliding my arms under his leather jacket to cling to him. He was so warm and comfortable and his words were just so fucking kind. "…Are you going to cry?"

"I don't know." I sniffled into his chest, my voice muffled.

"How can you cry when we're inches from the city? C'mon, Claryberry…" he cooed and I lifted my head to grin at him excitedly. Oh my God, he was right! He smirked back at me. "We _could _just stay here, hugging…"

"No!" I bounced back. "We have to go! I need to fill my lungs with polluted air!"

* * *

Eighteen (now nineteen, actually) days I'd been living in a body not my own, _nineteen _days I've been living with people I'm just getting to know, in a world that should've been fictional, in a small, quiet, town in bumfuck nowhere Virginia. The New York City skyline broke out across the horizon in the gray morning light. It was nearly 6AM, the sun had yet risen, but the twinkling city lights and the familiar haze set my world alight with a happiness I never thought I could possibly feel. The longing to be _home _settled over my chest with a buzzing glee and for the first time in nineteen days, tears of pure, relieved, happiness prickled. I tilted my eyes toward Damon, his blue ones meeting mine, and a wide smile spilled across my face. A rush of overwhelming, admiring, affectionate rose up for him.

"Damon Salvatore, you are, by far, the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, in my previous life and my new one." I told him adoringly and his blue eyes brightened, gleaming at me almost like _gems_. "When I'm totally ready for it, you can have my virginity." I vowed and shock splattered across his face, his eyes growing wide as his mouth unhinged slightly.

He drifted into the other lane as he openly gawked at me, the car behind us blaring their horn angrily causing him to snap from his stunned look and he jerked the car back. I grinned at him as he refused to look in my direction.

Ha _ha_.

One of my favorite things was shocking Damon. It was usually a difficult feat as he normally went for shock value too, and could one up me or run with it. But occasionally I'd throw something out that would render him completely taken aback. And it was the best freakin' thing in the entire world.

"Fucking right I get dibs on your virginity." He scoffed after a moment, a smirk flickering across his face. "I don't care if you decide to fork it over when you're an eighty year old brittle hag, I will be there, taking it. And then I will laugh for all eternity. I will have won over Disney's true love."

I burst into giggles.

* * *

Just because I've lived in New York my whole life, didn't mean I'd ever set foot in a hotel there. What would have been the point? And I had been to some truly spectacular hotels before. But there's nothing like the grand flare of New York. There's a reason why it was the greatest place on Earth. The New York Palace easily fell onto the top five most fabulous hotels I'd been to. I totally wasn't just saying that because I was completely in love with being home again and biased when it comes to the city, I swear. This place was a _palace_.

The glossy marble floor stretched out before us, leading to a set of spiraling, elegant, staircases that branched off in opposite directions. Glossy, green, marble columns separated the floors in pairs and a large, twinkling, glass chandelier hung magnificently overhead.

Honestly, it was like a switch being flicked as soon as I stepped foot into the lobby, the shockingly familiar sophistication and luxury assaulting my senses. I was Clarissa Everett, my mother's well-mannered daughter with her reputation and status to uphold.

"Clarissa," Damon growled lowly in my ear, his hot breath pelting against my skin, pulling me back from the façade that seemed to easily slip into place. "I _hate _that. Stop it or I'll snap your neck."

I released a puff of air and leaned closer to him. I wasn't Clarissa Everett, I was _just _Clarissa who had nobody to impress and a vampire ready to tear up the city with me. I grinned up at Damon.

"I won't kill you ever again," I quoted playfully and Damon smirked.

"We both knew I was lying." He dismissed. "Got caught up in the moment. Happens. Just like when I pinky promised never to compel you again." He gently grasped my chin, tilting my head so I was looking up at him fully. "Smack yourself in the face," he cooed sweetly and I smiled happily.

I slapped myself. Really hard. Right across the freakin' face. I gave startled cry of pain, loud enough to cause the few people in the lobby to look in our direction. I rubbed my stinging cheek in confusion. Why the _hell _would I have done that? Damon was grinning that little wickedly mischievous grin and I immediately realized I'd been compelled.

"You bitch."

His blue eyes locked with mine. "Every time you try to act like how your mother wanted you to behave, you're going to smack yourself in the face."

I stared at him in horror. "_Oh my God_," I squeaked. "Why? Damon!"

"I'm conditioning you." He threw me closer to him, his arm dangling off my shoulder, and leading me to the front desk. I had a feeling I was going to be smacking myself a lot. "It'll hurt me more than it'll hurt you." No it won't!

The pretty dark haired woman at the front desk smiled at us pleasantly as Damon sauntered us up to her. "Good morning," she said with the right amount of enthusiasm, something I was sure was well practiced, as _the help _were expected to behave a certain way. "Are you checking in, sir?"

I straightened and my hand came into contact with my face so hard I hissed in pain. The woman looked startled.

"Mmhm, we are," Damon said cheerfully, completely ignoring me as I glowered at him. This wasn't _fair_! The woman's brown eyes flickered from me to him, her calm friendliness back in place. She most likely assumed I had some issues and bringing attention to it would be _rude_. Thanks, Damon.

"Wonderful," she said warmly, typing away at her computer. "I hear it's going to be a beautiful weekend, perfect weather. May I have the name your room was booked under?"

Damon's entire demeanor became flirty as he leaned against the desk, signs that he was about to get his compulsion groove on. Goddamn. "This was all a very on the whim and romantic last minute decision."

Her smile didn't falter as she typed away. "Those are the best types of vacations," she said agreeably. "Though unfortunately, I don't think there's any free rooms…" I raised my eyebrows.

"Now, don't be absurd—" I smacked myself across the face and gave a cry of pain. This was getting old, _fast_! It wasn't my fault that I knew if we threw around status or drop an important name a room would magically be open!

"Who has most expensive room booked?" Damon asked cheerfully as I whined in misery. The woman blinked, looking a little dazed for a moment.

"That would be…" she typed away. "A Mr. E. Mikaelson."

"And how long is the room booked for?" Damon asked with an encouraging smile.

"The tower triplex suite is booked indefinitely, sir."

"Aw, D, I don't wanna take a room from someone named _Michael_-son." I frowned.

"If it's indefinite, than he's hoarding the room and he'll never know," Damon said with a half shrug. "The chances of him coming to use the room the same weekend as us is slim to none." I continued to frown and he groaned. "Pain in the ass…" he smiled at the woman. "_Second _most expensive room?"

"Why can't we just get a regular room?"

"Because we deserve the best." Damon said, like I was a child and he was teaching me the way the world worked.

"But we're killing Clarissa Everett," I reminded him causing him to squint his eyes at me. "And even if we got the _least _expensive room, we'd still be smothered in luxury so…"

"The Superior Room with the King bed is three hundred and thirty dollars a night," the woman offered helpfully. That was cheap, right? "And it has a stunning view of the city."

"Is there a room booked for this weekend?" Damon asked with a sigh, like this was a real drag. He was getting a room for friggin' free.

She typed away. "Mr. Harrison is due to check in tonight and will be staying until Monday." Damon tilted his gaze toward me.

"Are you sure you want _this _room?" He asked and I smiled at him merrily. "Fine. Correction, _we _will be checking into that room now."

She smiled. "My mistake, Mr…"

"Burgertit." Damon deadpanned and I choked on a laugh.

"How will you be paying for your room, Mr. Burgertit? Card or cash?"

"Card." I said sweetly and Damon shot me a look.

"No, we will not be." He said over me and I frowned.

"You can't expect her to pay, do you?" I asked. "She's a part of the help, she doesn't make a lot of money, D…" He stared at me flatly.

"Stop making that face at me." Damon squished my cheeks with a hand. What face? "Stop it." His attention shifted away from me for a moment, a wicked grin sliding across his face. He looked back at me and I, face squished, stared back in confusion. "Stay."

What am I, a dog? Like if he doesn't say that I'll wander off? Damon strolled away and I watched him intercept a rushed looking balding man in a freshly pressed suit. The man's gaze turned toward me and then to the woman at the desk. He nodded, and followed Damon back to the desk. I raised my eyebrows as Damon winked at me.

"Stuffy rich people who you _hate _will pay for us," Damon said happily and I found myself grinning at him. It was wrong, this was all wrong, and I didn't _care_.

* * *

Giddily, I pranced down the overly beautifully decorated hallway, skipping around Damon as we made our way to the hotel room. Damon seemed completely unfazed. Good. The creature was becoming accustomed to my ways. I was bouncing by the time we got to the room and Damon flung the door open dramatically, gesturing for me to enter first. The room was elegant in its simplicity: a king size bed, a few posh white chairs, a flat screen TV, a marble bathroom. I usually stayed in rooms that looked like small apartments, so this was just _awesome_. The door fell shut behind me and Damon spun me around dramatically.

"Oh _Clarissa_," he said lowly, blue eyes dancing with amusement. "We're alone. In a hotel room." Damon's voice was becoming more and more suggestive, his smirk turning flirty. "There's only _one _thing we can do now." A wide grin split across my face. Hell yeah!

"Jump on the bed!" I gushed excitedly. The one thing I always wanted to do and was never allowed.

"My thoughts exactly!" Damon agreed brightly, easily picking me up by the waist and flinging me. I crashed ungracefully onto the bouncy mattress with a shriek which quickly turned into laughter as he bounced up onto the bed and nearly fell off. He yanked me upward and I swayed, falling into him. "Jump!"

Pulling my hands into his, we bounced around on the mattress and I brimming with glee. This was _every bit _as magical and fun as I always thought it would be! Damon kicked the large decorative pillows off the bed, uncaring when they knocked things off the nightstands. I was giggling uncontrollably.

"Why," jump "are" jump "you" jump "_sooo _much fun?" Damon shoved me backwards and I screeched in surprise, quickly latching onto him. He easily pried my hand off his sleeve and I fell backwards, bouncing and rolling off the bed with a pained cry.

"Because," I laughed, sprawled out on the floor, grinning crookedly up at him, despite the pain. "_Beeeecaaaaause _it's me. And you. And combined we're _awesome_. So awesome that the higher powers in life decided to drag me from my world and stick me here just so we could fuck with Stefan."

Damon gracefully stepped off the bed and peeled me off the floor with one fluid motion that left me feeling a little dizzy. The orange glow of the morning's sun was spilling into the room and my heart bounced as I gazed up at Damon. The light heightened everything stunning about him, lighting his clear blue eyes and creating an illusion of a halo around his dark hair with how the light brushed across him. I couldn't help but think how _intimate _this all was suddenly, with his arms wrapped around me, my fingers curled in the front of his shirt.

"Clarissa…" he murmured softly, as though if he spoke any louder it would shatter the quiet morning. The way he said my name sent a flutter through me, made me feel so _alive_. Everything about Damon was soft now. Carefully, like handling something delicate, he moved his hands up to my shoulders and gently turned me so I was facing the window.

The sky was on fire with deep red and purple, the orange sun beaming out between glistening skyscrapers. The city that never sleeps was bursting with renewed life. I pressed my fingers against the chilly glass, basking in the warm light that was filling the room. Right now, it didn't matter, none of it mattered. It didn't matter I had someone else's face, or that I was living someone else's life, or anything my mother had done and hadn't done. All that mattered was that I was watching the sun rise and bask _my _city in an unearthly glow.

"I'm going to be happy." I said firmly, remembering Damon who was a few inches away from me. I was suddenly aware of the weight of his gaze. "You're going to be happy too. No matter what. That's what we deserve and that's what we'll get."

His fingers loosely slid over my wrist and I let him pull me away from the window. He was being so gentle and soft—I just didn't understand why Damon was painted to be the _bad guy_. There was just so much of him, so many different angles. He was like a crab, with the pincers out, ready to hurt everyone, ready to be defensive. But he's been _so hurt_, he's been half ruined by someone who should have just _loved _him. And even through it all, Damon still seemed to seek attention. And affection. And nobody seemed to understand him. Like how nobody understood me.

…Or maybe I was just sleep deprived. I groaned, pulling my hand from his and rubbing my face. The Founder's felt like days ago when it was just a few hours ago, and even though I didn't _feel _tired, my body probably was. My mind obviously had turned off.

"We should sleep," Damon seemed to read my thoughts. "Just for a few hours and then you can take us wherever you want to go."

I dropped my hands from my face and nodded, kicking off my shoes. "Probably for the best. I think the lack of sleep is making me all… screwy in the head."

Damon had, regrettably, closed the heavy posh curtains over the vast window. It'd make it easier to nap, but I still missed the sun despite knowing he was right. The king sized bed both felt way too big and way too small all at once. This was stupid and ridiculous and I wanted to _scream_.

I've slept _on _Damon before, so I wasn't sure why laying in the same bed with him was suddenly… exhilarating. I was suddenly so aware of the warmth that rolled off him in gentle waves, every intake of breath, and the strange electric snap that hissed through me with him being so close, yet not close _enough_. What the hell was wrong with me? Why was this suddenly an issue? I mean, given, I had always fallen asleep on him after having my neck broken, or when he was stroking my hair, forcing me to lay on his chest. Not that he had been really _forcing _me, but…

His fingertips brushed against mine and my heart jumped. Warmth flooded me, his touch causing my stomach to flip pleasantly. Nerves fluttered and I struggled to keep my breathing even. Oh my God. He's touched me before, this should be a no big deal, so why was I flipping out more than usual? My heart hummed loudly in my chest and I was stricken with a startling thought: I wanted him _closer_. Sucking in a breath, I tilted my head and his blue eyes captured mine in the darkness.

My heart skipped a few beats and fell into my stomach, beating nervously.

"You can hear my heartbeat," I whispered, shakily, my head feeling hazy as the warmth clouded over my thoughts. I was certain that he could, but I _needed _it confirmed. Damon's fingers ghosted over my palm causing my heartbeat to quicken and a jolt of excited pleasure to spear through me.

"_Yes_," he breathed, his fingers sliding between mine, his palm flat against mine.

I bit on my lower lip, a soft noise humming in my throat, as heat spread everywhere his skin touched mine. I curled my pulsing fingers through his and my mind swirled. I was _holding his hand_, something we've _done _before, and yet it was probably the most intimate thing I'd ever done. His blue eyes devoured me, caressing every inch of my face with an intensity I've never seen before. My breath hitched.

"This is stupidly intimate…" Damon's voice was thick sending my heart into a tumbling, dizzy, sputter. I nodded, unable to think, to find words. "Why is such a small, thoughtless, thing so _intimate_?"

"Because it's you." I blurted, my cheeks soaked with heat. "I've never—felt this… _attraction_, I told you… so every time you… you should know, you hear it. You make everything light up and explode inside me. It's only _you_, Damon. So for you, having a hundred something years of attraction to anyone… the little things wouldn't really stand out. I understand now why people like being sexual. This is insane." I was nervous, I was babbling, I was trying to make sense of this—whatever this _was_. Sexual tension, right? _Right_?

Damon was suddenly hovering over me, his knees on either side of my legs, a hand planted next to my face and everything inside me erupted brightly, loudly. He trailed his hot fingertips over my cheek and I was melting. My eyes fluttered shut and I made a soft, needing, noise as pleasure, and joy, pulsed to his touch. The electric heat made it so _painful _to not be touched and I wished I could ask him to touch every inch of me.

Peeling my eyes open, I hesitantly, curiously, pressed my fingertips against his jaw, his skin sending jolts down my fingers. My heart stammered nervously and I couldn't help myself, I couldn't _stop_. I moved my fingers up his face, slowly, delighting in the way his skin felt against mine. Damon made a noise and, with an excited flutter, I watched as he nuzzled into my hand, his eyes sliding shut. As if I had the same effect on _him_ as he did to me.

"_My God_," he groaned, his half-lidded blue eyes locking with mine, glowing and intense. "No, Clarissa, _no_, it's never been anything like this. The things you're doing to me… the things I'm doing to _you _just by touching your skin… The way your heart reacts to me…" His blue eyes were much darker, drinking me in and I felt like I was going to lose myself in his gaze.

"Sexual tension," I forced out, feeling completely undone as his fingers moved, trailing down my throat, stroking the skin. "I don't really see you as someone who sits around and lets it build. You want someone, you take that someone, end of story. I think this has been building since day one and now it's just… just this."

"…Yes." He agreed quietly, because that was the only thing that made sense! "That must be it. Are you hungry? If we don't leave this hotel room I'm not sure what the fuck I'm going to do." He was suddenly across the room and I released a puff of air, the chilly air striking against my body. I shivered, sitting up, feeling a little dazed.

So much for sleeping.

I stumbled out of the bed. So maybe I was feeling a little bit more than just _kind of _dazed. I wiggled into my converse, trying to snap myself out of it.

"I know this great place," I said as Damon opened the door for me. I grinned at him faintly, almost nervously, stepping out into the bright hallway. "You're not gonna get awkward or weird on me, are you?"

"Nope," he said, though he was a few inches away from me than he'd normally be. "There's no reason to. We're both aware that we should be tearing that room apart while having wild crazy sex." Damon's mouth flickered upward into a teasing smirk. "But _you _just have to be difficult."

"The best things in life are worth waiting for." I quoted and he rolled his eyes, amusement springing across his face.

"Mmhm. I'm sorry to burst your bubble, beautiful, but sex with _you _certainly won't be the _best _sex." He was seriously misinformed. I smiled at him, sweetly, and Damon eyed me almost _warily_. I pressed the button for the elevator.

"It will be, because it'll be _me_. And I am, by far, the _greatest _thing in the world." I told him sweetly as the elevator chimed, the doors whooshing open. Damon _scowled _at me.

Scowling meant he agreed!

Grudgingly agreed!

I am the best thing in his sad, sad, vampire existence!

My lips curved into the smirk he often tossed at me and threw it at him, prancing into the elevator. Damon followed me in and the doors whooshed shut.

And suddenly I wasn't feeling confident anymore because we were alone and his eyes were suddenly heavy on me. And I suddenly couldn't breathe. And suddenly he was so very close. My gaze seemed to be pulled in his direction, Damon's blue eyes were the only thing I could see for a moment. And God, he was pinning me down with that _look_. I didn't even know what that look meant.

"You're not." Damon blurted out, his voice low, his gaze cutting into me. I couldn't remember what we had been talking about. I'm not?

…I'm not the best?

Well. I had been _kidding_.

My back hit the elevator wall before I realized he had been backing me up into it. His fingers were tight on my arms, gripping me, like he was clinging and my cheeks quickly grew hot. What was he doing? I couldn't _think_. And all I could see was those beautiful, _beautiful_, blue eyes.

"You're not here to ensure the plot stays on course, so that Elena can be happy, or even to fuck with Stefan. You're not here for _any _of them. And, God, as much as I thrive in your company, you are _not _here for me." Damon rushed out quickly and dizziness stole my breath away. "None of us can have you like that, you weren't dragged here for anyone but you. You'll _never _have to _be _for anyone else ever again."

I had never wanted to kiss anyone before, and suddenly all I wanted to do was kiss Damon. Out of affection. Out of gratitude. Out of happiness and adoring admiration—out of friendship. Something sweet. Something chaste. He let me pull him down and I lifted onto my tip toes, brushing my lips against his cheek as sweetly and tenderly as I could.

There was nobody like Damon. _Nobody_.

"You and I," I murmured, pulling back, smiling at him happily. "We were meant to be friends, D. I _am _here for you. We're sleep deprived and stupid and weirdly intimate and now we're gonna go do mischievous vampire dickery things because fuck everybody."

His expression immediately became gleefully wicked, blue eyes glinting. Damon was back to being dickery Damon, like he hadn't just gotten sweet and emotional for a moment, like we didn't have crazy stupid sexual tension issues, like he totally wasn't running off zero sleep and four redbulls. He smirked down at me and the elevator doors dinged, whooshing open. I slid my hand into his and pranced into the lobby with the intent to do maximum damage.

* * *

I hope you guys aren't disappointed, I know everyone is pretty excited for them to get into some crazy shenanigans but they were in the car for 7+ hours and I couldn't resist some fluff and some bonding.

I just wanna answer some stuff real quick! :D

**Q: Will the originals be in this fic?**  
Yes! I LOVE the originals! And Katherine.

**Q: Will you be following the series?**  
Kind of! Obviously I'm going to follow most of season 1 as best as I can (you guys can already see how well that's working out lol) Clarissa is very... Well, Clarissa. She's not going to stand by and let things progress normally. I'm pretty sure I'm going to loosely follow season 2 as well. Maybe have some aspects of season 3 in there, but honestly guys I haven't seen much of season 4 and what I've been hearing about it... No. Just, no. Clarissa also is going to have her own weird supernatural thing happening. Like how she got in this body/why she can't die is going to be explained and have it's own plot going on.

**Q: Elena is a real bitch.**  
Okay so that's not really a question, but I thought I'd address it anyway. Am I making Elena too bitchy or is it just an overall feeling in general? I'll try to make her more likable, I know she comes off as parenting and a real drag. And I don't think that'll change much, especially with how she is and what kind of person Clarissa is. Gah.

**Q: Pairings!**  
Obviously Darissa. (Clarissa and Damon)  
And I swear it won't be Jicki! I don't know who Jeremy will end up with.  
If you guys want to see someone together, lemme know! Otherwise I'll just see where the writing goes and how things will change given Clarissa is there.

Darissa theme song: No Tomorrow by Orson. I think it pretty much sums up how they are when they're together lol

Thanks for reading! :D


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything, not even Clarissa!

BIG THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO REVIEWED!: Madam Salvatore, xxxRKOEnigmaxxx/Courtney, RealHuntress18, CallistoAngel, grapejuice101, princessabbie10, vikki. dillard, iheartanime07, xXxElizabeth MikaelsonxXx, Vanessa, penny. bear. 37, Lorelai Sofia Petrova, melissawtf, SomebodyWhoCares, karmen238, Chaos-and-Insanity, ADORATIO, MrsMusicAddict, Moka-girl, bridgetzombie, DrAnime203, nav, Vampire I No Drama, CacklingBlasphemy, ty, AnneTesla, Sakae Doragon, Guest, CalmDisposition, Britt, Jasmine, Cara, Charlotte, 1llu510n, Blue (THANK YOU FOR REVIEWING EACH CHAPTER!

Since I've been asked to have this out before the weekend, here ya go! I know, it's pretty short (compared to the length of other chapters) but there's apparently a huge storm coming my way starting tonight and lasting until Saturday or Sunday. And I have shitty internet so I also wanted to get this out to you guys today just in case I lose internet soon. Which... I probably will. Like light rain usually has the internet out. Gaah.

* * *

Damon was hardly surprised when Clarissa tilted over and promptly fell asleep on the table. He didn't like it when she slept, it reminded him too much of her being dead. Clarissa was a lively human, she fluttered about like a little hummingbird, chirping and singing, never keeping still. But asleep, she barely moved. Though he figured her body needed the rest as she never seemed to stop bouncing around. And it was so _boring_. He almost missed her when she was sleeping, as stupid as that was.

Maybe it _had _been irresponsible of him to have whisked her off to New York so late at night, but he needed to find out where the vervain was and in order to do that he needed Stefan to feel like Damon was a danger to Clarissa. Somewhere in the last few weeks, Stefan had become almost… _friendlier _with him. This would rip the cushioned comfort Stefan had settled into right out from under him. He might even ask Clarissa to play it up as well, see how far they could push Stefan into 'taking matters' into his own hands.

He had seen his opportunity and had taken it, suggesting leaving for New York had been an impulsive whim and a means to achieve his goal. He knew Clarissa didn't see much past _the now_, which he took full advantage of. She wasn't going to be prepared for the backlash of her easy agreement to take off with him, he knew how Stefan and his human Katherine look alike were going to react. But Damon couldn't find it in himself to _care_. Another part of himself, a selfish part, wanted to spend every possible moment he could with her, even if in the end it would end up being harmful to the both of them. He didn't have much time left with his little human, especially now that he had Emily's Talisman. Katherine would be free soon, and Damon didn't plan for them to stick around.

It was a quick seven hours, relatively speaking, though being in Clarissa's company was easy boarding on addictive. The very moment the city's skyline came into view, Clarissa had trailed off midsentence, almost as though she'd forgotten she was talking.

He watched her come to _life_, everything about her was _alive _and glowing. She was like the sun bursting through; bright, colorful and warm. Clarissa tilted her head in his direction and all of her brightness was aimed directly at him. He took in every inch of her face, from the freckles splattered across her nose, to the way her blue-gray eyes were lit, to the curve of her pink lips. Her smile was sweet and dazzling, spread across her pretty face like a tiny piece of sunshine, just for him, and him alone. Clarissa spoke his name adoringly, as though she were caressing each letter with her mouth and he wanted to be the only one who could bring her this happiness. The way she brought _him _that sort of happiness.

In that very moment, something _shifted _inside of him, something that Damon would not be able to stop. It shocked him thoroughly how that one look, with the way she said his name, could scatter his insides so easily. Damon was almost _nervous_, and couldn't help but stare at her in a state of astonishment. He knew that if she continued to look at him like _that_, and say his name, _in that way_, he would not be able to refuse her a damn thing. He wouldn't want to.

If Clarissa never told him her secrets, he wondered how things would've gone. He didn't doubt they'd eventually reach this point, he would've hovered to put Stefan on edge, and the mischievous twinkle in her playful blue-gray eyes would've kept Damon coming back to her. Clarissa's smile always seemed to suggest that she knew an inside joke everybody was supposed to be in on, but weren't. And Damon was _in _on that inside joke, which made everything _so much more fun_. Her slight resemblance to Katherine wasn't nearly as unnerving as the resemblance she held of a woman he'd turn into a vampire a few years ago. They even had the same exact eye color. But life lately seemed to be getting stranger and stranger as it was. She was never meant to be anything more than an excuse to get closer to Elena, to have Stefan in a fit of anxious, wary, anger.

And then he found himself becoming her damned blue canary.

And now, watching her sleep on large king sized bed, he realized she'd become his birdhouse.

He was royally _fucked_.

* * *

Damon and I decided to strip down and ride the giraffe out of the Central Park Zoo as we freed all the animals and took over the city. No, I'm just kidding. Wouldn't that have been epic? Instead I was sprawled out on the bed in the hotel room. It was 11AM and I'd just woken up after apparently passing out before even ordering breakfast. I'm so cool. _Not_.

"—_COMPLETELY IRRESPONSIBLE, CHILDISH, AND IMMATURE, CLARISSA!_" That's Elena, on speaker phone, screaming at me. The phone was laying innocently next to my head as I stared up at the ceiling in complete boredom. "_DO YOU KNOW HOW WORRIED I HAVE BEEN?_" But I told everybody where I was. "_DRIVING TO NEW YORK CITY? ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW? THAT KIND OF IMPULSIVE BEHAVIOR HAS TO STOP! YOU'VE ONLY KNOWN THIS GUY FOR, WHAT, LESS THAN A MONTH? AND NOW YOU'RE ALONE WITH HIM IN A CITY YOU'VE NEVER BEEN IN BEFORE! AND HE DROVE ALL NIGHT AFTER STAYING UP ALL DAY—WHAT IF HE FELL ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL AND YOU CRASHED AND DIED?_"

"It's okay, he had seventeen redbulls," I assured her breezily.

"_You're hilarious. Are you trying to punish me? Is this your way of acting out? I know we have our… issues, but we can work through them as a family! Just come home. I don't want you alone with him, Clare, okay? Stefan has told me that he can be very… charismatic, very charming, that he can talk you into things you don't want to do…_" Yeah it's called being freakin' compelled. Trust me, I _know_. "_And he's a bad influence on you. Stefan says he's also really impulsive and he's… he's got some other issues Stefan won't tell me about. I can get you a train ticket back home, or a bus ticket…_"

The door burst open and I lazily tilted my head, seeing a smirking Damon in the doorway. "I've brought the uncut cocaine!" He announced loudly. "It's alright, Clary, a _little bit _of cocaine is okay!"

"_Damon_," Elena hissed. "_If you do anything to my sister_—"

"Gotta go, Lena! My pimp is here!" I said cheerfully, snapping my phone shut. Damon dropped a plate down on the bed and I eyed the blueberry muffin happily.

"Blueberry muffin for you, sexy maid for me." Damon said, plopping down next to me as I peeled the wrapper off the bottom of the muffin. "And then I had a wonderful conversation with Stefan. I let him know I planned to corrupt you terribly."

Pfft. "Good luck with that." I said, pulling apart the muffin and popping a piece into my mouth. Have you ever eaten while laying down? It was kind of difficult. "I change for _no one_. I'm incorruptible. I'm—" I smacked myself in the face and choked on the muffin.

Damon laughed darkly at me as I rolled over, attempting to sit up so the muffin would friggin go down properly. He whacked me on the back and I tumbled face first out of the bed. Which hurt. _A lot_.

"Why do I hang _out _with you?" I groaned miserably, grabbing the sheets in an attempt to pull myself up, my face throbbing. At least I was no longer choking. Thanks, Damon. Seriously. Greatest friend award goes to him.

"Because without me you'd rot in bored misery." Damon smirked cockily at me, slinking off the bed lazily. I swiped the muffin off the plate and threw it at him. Which he easily caught. Damn it. "Clarissa, don't play with your food." He chastised lightly in a mocking way.

I puffed out a breath. "Y'know it's a damn good thing that I've got like zero interest in ever dating someone 'cause I'd probably end up with someone abusive." He stared at me blankly and I stared back.

"Mm." Damon turned away, tossing my phone at me which I fumbled to catch. He tilted his gaze back to me, and I realized I somehow offended him. God, vampires were such little drama queens. "Where do you want to go?"

"Out." I said immediately. "I just need to relish in walking around aimlessly for a bit."

Bursting out of the hotel and into the warm city air was like downing an entire bag of pixie sticks, I was _alive_. I was free. I was everything! I twirled around happily, skipping. While we'd been out earlier this morning, I'd been far too brain dead to really appreciate that I was _here_. Really _here_. Damon lazily followed after me, having no trouble keeping up with me with his slow I-Own-Everything stride.

"Maybe we can find my old apartment, break in, and burn it to the ground," I suggested cheerfully as I bounced past the gate that separated the front of the hotel from the sidewalk, easily sprinting away from one of the stuffy rich guys who was walking through at the same time.

I stilled, a flash of recognition spilling through me and I turned, my gaze following after the man. Was that—? The hair color was the same, and so was his build. But it _couldn't _be…

"_Michael_?" I blurted out, my fingers curling around the hem of his sleeve, stopping him, hope swelling like a balloon in my chest.

He turned, and for one, shining, moment I swore it was him. His face was similar, but it was so obviously _not _Michael. Disappointment twinged loudly as the well-dressed stranger stared back at me. I released a puff of air. He seemed relatively surprised, staring down at me with sharp brown eyes.

"_This _is Michael?" Damon's voice snapped me from my daze and I blushed hotly. "We're talking about the same guy who'd sneak you soda?" I was still gripping his sleeve and hastily let go before he decided to bill me for stretching out the material.

"No," I sighed, smiling apologetically at the classy looking rich guy. "Whoops, sorry. I didn't mean to grab you like that, you just look pretty similar to somebody that I used to know." And now I was going to have that song stuck in my head. Damn.

Suits, as I was now calling him, recovered fairly quickly, his expression impassive. He inclined his head a fraction to the left, his cool brown eyes sweeping across my face. "No harm done," he had a remarkably polite cultured voice. "You look extraordinarily like someone I was once acquainted with as well."

A faint grin slid across my face. "You're just trying to make me feel better."

"Perhaps," he allowed with a small tilt to his lips. "Is it working?"

"Nope. Still really weird and awkward." Well, this was getting boring fast. "Later, Suits!" I spun on my heels, taking Damon's hand and pulling him onto the sidewalk. Damon's blue eyes had narrowed a little.

"You're not upset." He said after a few moments of silence had passed. How could I be _upset_? "I assumed you'd be a little teary given it wasn't Michael."

"Pfft! I'm in the city! I'm with _you_! Who caaaares?" I waved off dismissively, swinging our linked hands happily. "But God, did you see his suit? How could I have ever thought that was Michael? Michael hardly wore his uniform correctly…" I trailed off thoughtfully. "He wouldn't have recognized me, anyway. I don't even know if there's a Clarissa Everett in this world. Better not be. There can only be _one_."

Amusement sprang across Damon's face. "_That _would be hilarious."

No. It really, really, wouldn't be.

* * *

"So, wait," I asked as Damon handed me the warm pretzel. "There are no _rules_? You can just compel whoever you want and get away with it? I feel like being a vampire is the same as using cheat codes in The Sims. Don't you have like… vampire police or like…"

"The equivalent of the Volturi?" Damon offered lightly and I started to nod only to stare at him in shock. His casual indifference turned mocking.

"You read _Twilight_?" Oh my _God_.

"Mmhm. All four books." Damon said like it wasn't any big _deal_. "They were awful, I'm offended that you like them."

"I don't like them!" I denied, my cheeks quickly growing warm. "It was a phase! I was bored! It'd just came out and I was looking for a new book to read, and it was _okay_, and I was like thirteen! It would've been fine if she just ended with the first book but then a second one came out and I had to finish the series…"

Damon looked more amused and I puffed a breath out. Just. Goddamn it. "Jacob's part in the last book wasn't so bad… The wolves were pretty interesting."

I brightened. "I _know_, I loved that—I…" Oh. Damon's smirking made me realize he'd been playing me and I huffed. "Well, I wouldn't be surprised _you _were able to sit through Twilight. The love triangles should've made you feel right at home."

Damon threw me a flat look that I smiled cheerfully at.

"You're like a vampire Jacob. All angst and misery. And then you see KP's descendant, who happens to look exactly like KP, but whatever, and you're like hot damn, gotta tap that and fall in magical true love." Which… "I thought you said vampires can't reproduce?"

"They _can't_." Damon murmured, clearly annoyed. His fault. He challenged me and now I was whooping his ass. _Emotionally_. "She clearly must've… had a child before becoming a vampire." He really didn't look pleased about that. He looked a little sick, actually, and I leaned closer to him, feeling guilty now. "It's the only thing I can think of that would explain _Elena _and this body you're in." I nearly tripped. "But Katherine wasn't a _Gilbert_."

I resembled Elena. Which meant I resembled _Katherine_. Did that seriously not click for me the entire time I was here?

"Oh…" I shifted awkwardly. "I'm… Sorry I look like KP."

"I don't see her when I look at you." Damon said quietly. "The resemblance is only slight, and you… look like someone else, kind of. Like a weird hybrid child between her and this woman I met a few years ago."

I ripped a piece of the pretzel off and popped it into my mouth. It was time to get Damon out of this mood I'd accidentally shoved him into.

"Can't you eat like a normal person?" Damon asked drily. "And just bite into it? Why do you have to always eat things by tearing them into little pieces?"

"Because when I was little I was impatient and ripped my front teeth out, bottom and top, and couldn't chew properly." I said dismissively. "Or maybe this has been training for when I come here and get turned into a vampire and do terrible things. Like ripping people into pieces."

"You are never becoming a vampire." Damon said flatly.

"All for the best, I guess. You've never seen me after like a week without sugar. I would just kill everyone if I was a vampire. All the time. Just endless blood everywhere, all for me. I'd probably sugarcoat it too. Just dump ungodly amounts of sugar packets into giant vats of blood…"

Damon stared at me.

I smiled cheerfully back.

"You _idiot_," he said, a faint grin tilting across his handsome face. I _win_.

* * *

"When is Stefan's birthday?" I asked curiously after finding Damon in the back of the store. He was staring at a spinning globe with flashing lights in faint interest and tilted his gaze toward me.

"November fifth," Damon said almost automatically and I grinned in amusement. What a good, caring, brother, remembering a birthday after a hundred and forty-something years of hate. He narrowed his eyes. "_Why_?"

"Because," I held up the box I'd been holding which Damon snatched from my hands. "It's an Edward Cullen dildo. It _sparkles _in the sunlight."

A wide grin flew across Damon's face. "Just what Stef _always _wanted."

* * *

Damon appeared in front of me suddenly with a mischievous grin. "Look, Clary," he cooed, pulling out a fluffy, white, _unicorn_ stuffed animal. I sprang backwards, smacking it from his hand in a fit of anger.

"GET THAT SHIT OUT OF MY FACE!" I exploded. I didn't _care _if we were surrounded by children, I would swear all I wanted. He had talked me into going to FAO Schwarz and now it was just pure regret! Forever ruined! Amused surprise danced across his face.

"You don't like _unicorns_?" He asked, too gleefully. "What the _hell _is wrong with you? You're the sweet innocent virgin who is obsessed with true love, unicorns are _your symbol_!"

"Like hell! Shut up about the damned asshole creatures, D! Shut up! Ugh! That song! It'll be stuck in my head and I'll want to _die_!" I snapped, frustrated. "They're assholes! All of them! Fucking impale me in the face!"

"Song? Do you mean the…" Damon's smirk was becoming more and more feral. "Alwaaaays…"

My eyes widened. There was no fucking way Damon knew about Robot Unicorn Attack! "Damon," I hissed in a warning.

The unicorn was back in his hand and he slammed it into my face so hard I nearly fell over. I screeched, flailing. "I wanna beeee with you! And make beeeelieve with you! And live in HAAAARMONY! HAAAARMONY! OOOOH LOVEEE!"

"_Noooo_!" I cried, crumbling to the ground. He threw the stuffed animal at me and I wailed as it bounced off my tortured body. "It burns us!"

"I've defeated the wicked witch!" Damon announced causing three children to spring at me out of nowhere. Oh God! "That's right, Munchkins, you are free!"

* * *

It was like almost four in the afternoon and Jeremy was _just _getting up. Livin' the high life. Radical.

Jeremy: _lenas pissed i 'let' you run off to ny, which i said it was beyond my control, that i just felt COMPELLED to be okay with it. damon is one smooth talker. winkwink. stef looked pissed_.

"Jeremy's completely putting the blame on you," I announced, amused, as Damon idly picked through a rack of shirts. He had to get a new outfit, gotta keep up the stud look for the stud lifestyle. So he says. "He told Stefan he just felt… _compelled _to be okay with me running off to the city with you."

"Excellent." Well, Damon looked thoroughly pleased. He probably had some other Damon Dickery scheme brewing that he wasn't telling me about.

I texted back: _Con. putting all the blame on D, he's got something planned. play this up as much as possible._

Jeremy: _sweet rather lena be pissed at him then me_

"What do you think about this?" Damon drew my attention away from my phone and I raised my eyebrows at the dark polo with a crewneck. He held it against himself, blue eyes flickering up curiously to meet mine, as though seeking _approval_.

"_Ralph Lauren_?" I scoffed, wrinkling my nose. "I guess if you were a—" I smacked myself across the face and hissed. Damon squinted his eyes at me.

"Why did you… ah, right," a grin twitched across his face. The bastard _forgot _he compelled me? "What's wrong with Ralph Lauren? I think I'd look nice in this. We're in the _city_, Clary." What the hell did that mean?

"You're a Diesel kind of guy, D." I said, careful not to be snobbish Everett. I really didn't want to smack myself again. Damon's eyebrows rose. "I've been hanging out with you for _three weeks_, I think I'd notice your favorite brand. What kind of friend would I be if I didn't?"

"A normal person." Damon deadpanned and I scoffed, waving his comment aside dismissively. I caught the eye of one of the help and he trotted over to us with a flirty smile. While he was dressed in all black, like the others, he had a sort of _zing _to his look. He was perfect for us.

"How may I assist you?" He asked, his hazel gaze shifting in Damon's direction. He tsked. "Oh, dear. Ralph Lauren? If I may?" He tilted his head toward me and I nodded. "This is all wrong for you, it just _clashes_." he fluttered closer to Damon, peeling the shirt away like it was the most repulsive article of clothing in the world. He looked Damon up and down critically, one arm tucked around his torso, the other perched at the elbow against it, his fingers tapping against his chin thoughtfully. "I would suggest Burberry."

"Diesel, actually." I said pleasantly. "I need a Loslo Jacket, 'TOS' Slub V-Neck tee, and for the jeans…" I trailed off thoughtfully. "Larkee Relaxed Fit in denim."

"Oh, yes, I can see it." The help said with a clap of his hands. "What color tee?"

"Black." I said immediately and the help stood back to examine Damon who merely stared back at us, his expression giving nothing away about how he felt. He was probably thinking about ripping our limbs off and beating us to death with them.

"Mm, I'm not sure. I'll come back with black _and _dark gray."

"Don't you need my pants size?" Damon asked and the help winked.

"Honey, I'm very good at my job. I know what sizes you are." The help said in a very sassy, flirty, manner, sauntering off in another direction. I decided I liked him. Damon's gaze cut into me and I looked back at him curiously.

"You seem to be in your element here." Damon remarked. "It's been about… a hundred and… ah… forty-nine? Maybe a hundred and fifty years since I allowed anyone to pick out my clothes."

"I'm not _really _picking them out. It's your style. You would've ended up choosing them." I shrugged a shoulder. "And what can I say? This was my _life_. No matter how many times I slap myself, I'm always going to have aspects of being an Everett. Knowing brands was _important _to mother. So I could correctly select the right _friends _that way."

"And now you're hanging out with _me_." Damon pointed out. "I bet your mother would be so _proud_."

"She would've been actually." I agreed casually. "You have an expensive taste in clothing _and _lifestyle. Not to mention the very aristocrat look about you despite your whole I'm-Rebelling-Against-Daddy appearance."

"My _what_?" Damon narrowed his blue eyes at me. I continued on, ignoring him.

"_And_ you can charm the clothes off anyone. Not to mention your name holds weight. Salvatore? It just _sounds _good. Mother would have been pleased." A smirk slanted across my lips. HA! "Jokes on _her_, you're a murdering creature of darkness who encourages _all _my bad behavior."

I laughed evilly to myself. More wins. All for me. Damon gave me an odd look just as the help sauntered back over, clothes folded neatly over one arm. He held up two shirts in one hand, sliding in front of Damon.

"This is the black," the help said pleasantly, holding up the black shirt in front of Damon. "Which, I confess, looks a lot better than I thought. But," he put the shirt over his arm and held up the dark gray. "_This _looks much better, don't you agree? It's not as dark, which causes his hair to look _so much darker _which, in turn, causes those blue eyes of his to stand out more."

It was _true_. Oh my God. His blue eyes _did _stand out more. "I think you should try both of them on…" I said halfheartedly. "I mean, while the gray certainly brings out… your eyes… I don't know how it'll look _on _you. Black is always…"

Damon rolled his eyes and shrugged out of his black dress jacket, flinging it at me. Rude! I caught it clumsily, nearly dropping the bag I was holding that held the Edward Cullen dildo for Stefan. It wasn't until he started working on the buttons on his black button up did I realize his intentions.

"There's dressing rooms…" the help said in the sort of way that suggested he kind of wanted Damon to just strip down too.

"Mm, this will only take a second. I really don't feel like playing dress up for you two." Damon murmured and really, he didn't have to compel anyone, because I doubted anyone could say no to him when he's showing off that amount of skin, talking in _that _low voice, with _those _blue eyes.

I pulled my phone out and quickly took a picture. I mean, I kind of remember Caroline asking for a picture once, so… I quickly sent it to her with: _DAMONS GETTING NUDE AT THE STORE_

Her reply was immediate: _WOO HOO! ! ! ! THROW MONEY! ! ! !_

But when he pulled his dress shirt off completely, tossing it carelessly onto the rack of shirts, I forgot I was even holding a phone. How Damon managed to look like a freakin' Sex God, I'd never know. I didn't believe him when he said it wasn't a vampire thing. It _had _to be. The help stared, open mouthed, at Damon who took the gray shirt from him.

"Oh honey," the help breathed next to me, hand on my arm. "Tell me what team he plays for."

"Damon doesn't play for any teams, we play for him." I managed to say as Damon pulled the shirt over his delicious stupidly overly attractive chest. Damon, who obviously heard us, smirked and the help next to me choked on a gasp. Yeeeah, me too.

"Well?" Damon purred, blue eyes gleaming. "How do I look?"

"I think you should try on more clothes." The help said. "Take that off."

"Maybe you should just walk around naked." I suggested playfully with a grin. Now that he wasn't shirtless, I was pretty much back to normal and okay. The help, not so much. He was still gawking at Damon like Damon was the second coming of Jesus. "But yeah, he was right. Dark gray is the way to go. You're looking _killer_, D."

"Mhm." Damon was such an arrogant little sucker. He pulled the shirt over his head and tossed it at the help who sputtered, catching it easily. "Ring it up. I'll take everything. _And _the black shirt, since Clary likes it so much." Damon winked at me, like I should be _so _flattered he's not going to pay for a shirt I want him to wear.

There was no way he was going to turn me into that Damon craving hormonal mess. Not with him being so _cocky _about it. I tore my gaze away from his bare chest. It was beyond being an Everett, damn it, I was _Clarissa_, and I bowed to no man. Especially not Sex God vampires. _Or _got weak kneed! I wasn't going to do any of that. Nope.

"Is there a store policy that says he can't walk around shirtless?" I drawled with well-practiced indifference, despite my fluttering heart. The help was staring at Damon.

"I… I supposed not." The help said after a moment. "Given he's going to change into… I'll ring this up—if someone… gives you two a problem…" He trailed off, blinked, and simply walked off toward the registers.

God is that how I looked when Damon got me flustered? I buried my face into my hands, groaning.

"Don't worry Claryberry, when _you _get that way, it's _much _more adorable." Damon's low, taunting, voice slid around me like velvet, coaxing me into lifting my head. I shouldn't have been surprised to see him inches away from me, his blue eyes fixed on mine, a haughty smirk stretched across his stupid face. My stomach lurched.

Like three minutes after swearing Damon wouldn't have any affect, I'm a mess. Stupid. Freakin'. Vampires. Quickly self, defuse the situation with _humor_!

"Damon, I want you to strip down and change right in front of everybody." I grinned at him and Damon tilted his head, as though considering me.

"What is it with you and wanting me to strip all the time?" He wondered, taking the dress jacket from my hands and tossing it aside carelessly. It fell to the ground with a soft _thawmp_. I straightened, tilting my chin upward in a defiant way.

"Oh _Damon_," I sighed, looking up at him through my eyelashes. More things I'd seen Caroline do when she was flirty. "Steffy told me all about your days as a stripper. I know you had to support his addiction."

"Those were dark times, Clary." Damon threw back, pretending to be taken aback. He then frowned. "Wait. When did you and Stefan talk about me _stripping_?"

"School." I shrugged. "I spend about six hours in his company every day there." Damon actually looked pretty annoyed by that. "Don't worry, most of it is spent making him regret his decision to attempt to talk to me. Are we just leaving your jacket and button up on the floor?"

His irritation fell into amusement, a cat like grin flickering across his face. "Claaaary, you're the one who said if you don't like something, throw it on the floor." Oh hell yeah! I beamed at him. "Do you want me to get you anything while we're here?"

For a moment I was surprised he'd offer—but then I remembered he wasn't paying anyway. "Mm, nah. I feel bad enough about making the help pay, or getting the help fired when you compel him to let us have it all for free."

Damon scoffed. "He won't be paying for us. That nice man who is paying for our room gave us his card. _He's _paying for our weekend."

I brightened. "This changes everything! But nooo, I don't want anything. Not _here_."

Was it wrong that I didn't _care_? Was it wrong that I was almost… _glad_? If Damon was going to take advantage of people, I'd rather it be the overly privileged. It also felt like I was giving a giant middle finger to my previous life and everybody I hated who was a part of it. Fuck you guys, seriously. Now we're going to spend your money.

Fuck it. I didn't care if that made me a bad person.

"You haven't been slapping yourself." Damon noted as we made our way to the registers. A lot of people were tripping over themselves to get a look at him. Not even kidding. It made me _grin_. "And you were behaving pretty… Everett-y."

"I was behaving Clarissa-y," I corrected matter-of-factly. "Loophole. This is me. I can't slap myself for _choosing _to behave like myself."

"Why do you call them 'the help'?" Damon deadpanned and I snorted. Seriously?

"Because _those _people—" I smacked myself across the face and swore loudly. Damon smirked, looking satisfied. What the _hell_? I thought I found the friggin' loophole!

"_That's _your mother talking." Damon said cheerfully and I grumbled, rubbing my cheek. He was right, it was. But shit. This slapping crap had gotten old the third time it happened, it needed to end. Now.

"Can you stop making me hit myself?" I snapped. "You're worse than I am. All you see is lesser creatures to feed off of!"

"But I'm _happy _to be this way." Damon tapped my nose and I glowered at him. I almost didn't care he was shirtless with how annoyed I felt. _Almost_. "And you don't _want _to be what your mother was trying to make you: a snobbish rich brat who thinks she is better than everyone just because she comes from _money_."

I snatched his hand, ignoring the jolt that went through me at the contact, and slammed it against my chest. Damon blinked, _surprised_, and I smirked. "You got boob action without any shirt on, now take away the compulsion."

Damon was completely still, like a statue, his expression blank as he stared at me. First thing that flickered across his face was a look of sheer, incredulous, bewilderment. Which clashed as amusement sprang. He squinted his blue eyes, which were fixed on my chest, his face a spasm between emotions. His fingertips twitched and he... Squeaked? Why was Damon _squeaking_?

I realized he was trying to keep back _laughter_. His expression softened incredibly, blue eyes dancing with pure amusement. He tilted his head away, shoulders shaking. Within seconds, he was openly laughing. But it wasn't like any other laugh I ever heard from him. It wasn't mocking, taunting, or that 'I'm an evil vampire who just did vampire dickery related things' laugh, or the 'this is extremely amusing we have an inside joke you're not a part of ha-ha Stefan'. Not even the 'Clary just said something ridiculous and now I'm cackling at her' one.

His laughter just seemed so _warm_, and _happy_ and just honestly _amused_. He wasn't Damon the vampire, he was Damon, my _friend_ and he looked much younger suddenly, almost sweeter. I liked this laugh. I wanted him to laugh like this _more_.

"Clarissa…" he shook his head, a tiny smile on his face. "To think that I could be swayed like that, for _shame_." I shoved his hand from my chest. Like a switch, he was back to teasing self with overtones of flirtation in his voice.

"You'll bend to my will soon enough." But my threatening tone fell dramatically flat because with the way he was grinning at me, like a lazy predator faintly amused by a mouse, and the fact that he was _shirtless_ I was having trouble focusing.

Damon's smirk grew. His now darker blue eyes brushed over me.

Goddamn.

My gaze was sliding down his chest. His stupidly perfect chest.

_God. Damn_.

"Cash or card?" The help asked, breaking me from my… well, _ogling_. I released a breath as Damon tilted his consuming gaze away and I curiously glanced at the register. _923 _stared back at me and I couldn't help but think how decently priced that was.

"This is my card," Damon purred, sliding the silver credit card across the counter. "If you have no objections, I'm going to get changed here. To save myself the hassle." The help _stared_. Like he wasn't sure if Damon was kidding or not (but totally hoping he wasn't). "Hold this."

He pressed his phone, wallet (what did he need that for?) and the crystal-jewel thingy he'd taken from the Lockwood's into my hands like he was entrusting me with the Ring of power. I guess this shit was really important. Something caught my eye and I tilted my head toward his arm. Was that… a tattoo? I figured I'd ask him about it later.

"I'll keep it secret, I'll keep it safe." I vowed dramatically, dropping them carelessly into my bag.

"I'd follow you all the way to Mordor." The help said, dumbstruck, as Damon, giving none of the fucks, slid out of his shoes (we needed to buy him a nice pair of converse to go with the new outfit) and, teasingly slow, unbuckled his belt.

It was Caroline's birthday all over again.

"You can _have _my sword, if you know what I mean…"

And I was glad we were keeping this Lord of the Rings themed.

I decided, what the hell, why not? I pulled my phone back out and took a picture of Damon wiggling out of the dress pants. I sent one to Caroline and one to _Stefan _to provoke him with: _you weren't kidding about him being used to stripping WE'RE GETTING FREE STUFF_.

Suck it, Stefan.

The help sucked a breath in. "Oh…"

Damon, all smirks and smugness, stood, in a pair of boxers. In the middle of freakin' Bloomingdales. At this point, I was way to freakin' amused to be a mess. I was actually kind of proud. Like, this is Damon, we hang out, he does outrageous things like strip and use strangers' credit cards to pay for things.

I whipped out my camera and hit the record button. "Say hi Damon!"

Damon grinned at the camera, blue eyes glinting with mischief. "_Clary_! First you demand I strip, and now you're further objectifying my _body_!"

My phone exploded with text alerts, undoubtedly from Caroline. Or STEFAN. Or both. HA!

"What can I say, D?" I tilted the camera downward slowly. "Mmm, giiirl, look at that body!"

"The things I must _endure_ being in your company!" Damon cried and I grinned widely at him.

"Tough business you're in, babe! Now give papa a little dance." I glanced at the help as Damon shot me a look. "Hey, guy! What's your name?"

"Nate." He answered, without really looking away from Damon. I couldn't blame him.

"Nate, dance with Damon!"

Both Nate and Damon looked at me with various expressions of surprise.

"I… Well…" Nate blinked and glanced back at Damon who looked like he was about to be a sourpuss and tell me to eff off. That wasn't happening!

"Damon, _dance _with Nate." I urged. "It'll be _fantastic_."

"You…" he began and blinked, his expression flickering into a different one. He suddenly grinned at Nate, and held out a hand. "Let's _dance_."

"Oh my God." Nate squeaked. "Are you _serious_?"

"It's how we roll, Nate." I grinned widely. Hell yeah, murderous vampire dancing around in his boxers in the middle of Bloomingdales. This was the new normal!

And it was to my glee that Damon waltzed Nate around the cash registers.

We were gathering a crowd.

Most of whom had their phones out. Clearly recording.

I ended the video when Damon spun Nate around and _dipped _him. That I took a picture for. I mean, _come on_, it would've been criminal if I didn't. The small group around us broke into an applause, Nate looked awestruck, and Damon only looked more haughty and smug. Honest to God, I bet he could sustain himself off attention if he was ever in a position where he couldn't drink blood.

Nate, grinning widely, came over to me. "You _have _to tag me in that video and picture, my friends will never believe me!"

While Nate and I exchanged numbers, and facebooks, Damon got dressed. It was unsurprising that he looked disastrously attractive while pulling off the I-Don't-Care look. Like these clothes so happened to be laying around and he just threw them on and it was just an accident that he looked devastatingly beautiful. Son of a bitch.

"We're keeping your pants?" I asked as he stuffed them into the Bloomingdales' bag along with the black tee.

"Clarissa…" he purred, his smile _filthy_. "I don't want any _strangers _to get into my pants."

"Yes you do." I said immediately. "You live for wild dirty sex."

"I'm down for that." Nate blurted and Damon slung an arm over his shoulders.

"Nate, you are _stunningly _beautiful, but I'm sad to say…"

"Straight?" Nate guessed with a faint smile.

"Terribly." Damon nodded. "It really limits my options and is _so _against my personality. If I could, I would have wild sex with _everybody_." He sighed, as if really crushed. "But if I'm ever looking to experiment… You'll be my first call." Damon winked and I swear I could _see_ Nate falling in love.

I could feel it.

It was just so _bam_.

I mean, it's _Damon_.

"Bye Nate!" I said cheerfully with a wave, as Damon sauntered to me. Nate smiled giddily.

"Bye Clare, it was _wonderful _to meet you…" Nate said, his hazel gaze tilting toward my vampire buddy. "Bye Damon…"

"We'll see each other again." Damon smiled his little flirty smile, wiggling his fingers.

That either meant Damon was totally gonna bring me to the city more often.

Or it meant Damon was going to feed on, and possibly kill, Nate before we left.

I returned Damon his phone, wallet and his witchy thing while I checked my texts.

Caroline: _OMFG CLARE THAT IS THE FUNNIEST (HOTTEST) THING_

Caroline: _I NO THAT ELENA IS SUPER UPSET BOUT U GOING 2 THE CITY BU PERF 4 ECHOTHER DAMON IS THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN HANDLE U BC HES CRAZY 2_

Caroline: _im saving these pictures_

Caroline: _U BETER FUKING DO HIM_

Oh, Caroline.

"I took a picture of you stripping and sent it to Stefan." I said as we exited the building. "I told him you were stripping for clothes." I could feel his eyes on me as I opened Stefan's text: _What do you mean, you're getting free stuff? Can I call you? Are you okay?_ "And his reply is filled with boring worry. Like you're stripping and he's asking me if I'm okay… Oh, he's probably worried about my ovaries and if they exploded. How nice."

I stuffed my phone back into my pocket, ignoring Stefan's text. It wasn't worthy to respond to.

"Mmm, Stef often likes to ruin a good time with a bad case of seriousness. Forget him, let's not talk to him or about him for the rest of the weekend." Damon said lightly. "And I have to say, Clary, I'm surprised. I didn't think I'd like this outfit as much as I do." He smirked. "I especially like this jacket. Could be a new favorite."

I brightened, smiling at him happily as warmth spread across my chest. "We're _friends_, D. I know what you like. I got this. Oh!" I gently took his hand, pulling his arm closer. "Before, I think I saw a tattoo on your arm?"

Damon nodded and pushed up his jacket's sleeve, tilting his arm so his forearm faced upward. I leaned closer, tracing my fingers over the black letters of what I was pretty sure was Latin. The touch of his skin sent little warm tingles up my hand which seeped through me like an electric wildfire. I was so close that his warmth enveloped around me.

"Hic et nunc," Damon murmured softly. "Latin for _here and now_."

"Fits." I said after a moment. "That's so you."

"I got it after…" he faltered and I looked up at him. Damon had a haunted look to him, his gaze distant. I wondered if anyone else knew him like this. I wondered so many things. I crept closer, we were nearly touching now, and gently brushed my fingers over his arm soothingly. His blue eyes slid to meet mine.

"You don't have to talk about it. You're allowed to have things you can't or don't wanna tell me, it's kay, D. I get it." I smiled at him gently. Damon tucked a piece of my hair behind my ear, his fingers falling down to stroke my cheek. My heart fluttered.

"I got it after my humanity switched back on," he said softly. "It _sucked_. It was misery. There was so much anger and hurt and _guilt_… so much _guilt_. I've done so much damage. I never wanted to return to New York, but now I'm _here_, with _you_. And we're so happy and all I do is laugh, but the last time I was here… I just…"

"I know," I cut in quietly. "Damon, trust me when I say, you _deserve _to be happy. You are the furthest thing from a bad guy. You're a dick, and you're mischievous, and you have good reasons to be pissed at Stefan, but you haven't done anything to him that I would ever consider _evil_. You've looked out for him, I think you will always care about him even if you don't want to. You've… been hurt beyond anything anyone should be and you still _care_. And you want to be cared about in return. You deserve to be, more than anyone else I've ever met. You know how to play the role of bad guy, you did it when you were human too and would take the heat for Stefan. I know how it is. You weren't good enough for your father, and then you weren't good enough to be just KP's. You became a vampire and then Stefan went postal. And then suddenly you were _bad _in everyone's eyes. But you're _not_. You are _perfect _the way you are. You've nearly been ruined, like I have, and just because you're not what society says is _good _doesn't mean you aren't."

He was still and let me gently take his hands into mine. His blue eyes sought mine, a quiet, fragile, vulnerability skirting across his face. "How can you say that to me? I hurt you. I shove you to the ground, I make you hit yourself, I kill you. Oh God, Clarissa, I _kill _you." I smacked his face with his own hand. Damon blinked rapidly, looking taken aback.

"Stop getting Stefan on me, D." I shushed. "You're… I guess, an anti-hero. You're willing to do what nobody else is to get done what you have to get done. You're willing to be the bad guy, you're willing to be a source of blame for Stefan so Stefan can be less of a tool. But you're also kind. And sweet. And considerate. And you're playful and funny and _I _won't abandon you and _I_ won't let anybody else hurt you. You're my friend and I will _always _be on your side, and I will always trust you and I will always care about you. You can always just be _Damon _around me. Even if you want to tear someone's throat out. So. Yeah. This is my speech. My Damon-Is-A-Great-Guy speech."

Damon stared at me with his pretty blue eyes. A mixture of expressions flickered across his face: surprise, fondness, _embarrassment_. He groaned and dropped his head against my shoulder. I cheerfully patted the top of his head.

"There, there. I won't tell anyone that you're actually a cuddle craving demon with a sad origin story. It'll be our secret." I promised happily. He didn't say anything, merely buried his face into the crook of my neck causing a flutter of nerves to bounce through me. "How about we go put this stuff back into the room, and…"

"Caaaan't." Damon puffed out in a whine, his breath hot on my skin. _Gah_. "I'm… kind of veiny eyed and vamped up." …_WHAT_?

"My speech was supposed to be cheerful!" I frowned, not sure if I should feel offended. "You're not supposed to get vampy on me!"

"I can't help it!" He whined childishly. "Heightened emotions and all that shit, I want to bite you!" My heart skipped. "_Stop doing that! _You're not helping! I can taste your pulse."

What?! What did that even mean—what—I just… I huffed and tried to stay still.

Caaalm down heart.

Nothing to be bouncy over.

It's just Damon leaning on me like dead weight.

Wanting to bite me.

Nothing to be excited over.

Pffft.

"So you want to bite me because you're…" I trailed off. "Emotional." He growled. "Okay. You're… feeling heightened. By my inspiring speech that should have been a cheerful one."

"Five minutes. No talking."

He was kidding right?

"…Wait, are you pissed?" I didn't think he was, but then again, maybe when he said he was vamped out it was because he was _angry_?

"I will sink my fangs into your pretty little neck." He threatened.

"Damon that's _dirty_."

"I swear to Christ."

"Swear to me." I said in my best Batman voice.

"I can't remember why I ever felt guilty about killing you."

"Aw we both know that isn't true. You don't even pick my nose. You cuddle me and cry. Claaary nooooo, my one true friend, I'm terrible and filled with horrible things, noooo!"

"This is probably why your mother didn't love you." Damon hissed and suddenly I didn't want to poke fun at him anymore, a snap of hurt ricocheting through me.

Damon knew where to strike to hurt and I almost hated myself for letting it get to me. It was just so _true_. It wasn't what he said, or the fact that he said it. It was just the fact that he was so dead on. I wondered if I'd ever reach a place in life where it wouldn't matter, where she didn't matter, but… Damon was alive for so long, and none of his hurts healed any.

"I hate when you're quiet." Damon muttered. But he _just _said. "I don't want you to stop talking, I just—need you to stop. For a few minutes. You make my control slip because you make me stupid and happy."

I leaned my head against his, a tiny smile flaring to life across my face. "I wanna take you to a vampire bar, D. You can pick someone to cart around as a snack. And then I wanna get a tattoo. Clarissa Everett would never get a tattoo, _never_, and I'm fairly sure neither would Clarissa Gilbert. But I want to mark this body as mine."

"_Claaaary_," Damon's lips were curving into a smirk, which I could feel against my skin. Damn it. "That is so _impulsive_. I love it."

"You're not going to try to talk me out of it?" I don't know why I was surprised. This was _Damon_. He lifted his head, a smirk playing across his handsome face, blue eyes gleaming.

"_Never_." Damon said lowly, pulling my hands into his and bringing them to his mouth. "Whatever you want, Clary, you can _have_."

"Oh please." I pulled my hands from his, amused. "Don't think I don't know what you're up to. I'll come back with a tattoo, Elena will freak out and Stefan will be like SHE'S BEEN COMPELLED! And you'll prance off cackling."

"Maybe that's a _little _true..." Damon admitted, his smirk growing. He offered his arm, which I took, and led us down the sidewalk. Presumably back to the hotel. "But I can't help it if you're so impulsive that it fits into what I already have _scheming_. I need to find the vervain in the boarding house, Clary, and in order to do that Stefan must believe he needs to protect you from compulsion. Or, I don't know… Try to poison me. Once I know where the vervain is, I can possibly get a shoe in with the council, see what they're up to and what they _know_."

"See this is what I was saying. Playing the bad guy to get shit done. I dunno if I'd wanna just throw the blame all on you and have everyone be pissed at you." Though it would make dealing with the consequences of Elena's rage _so much easier_. "Vervain is the magical plant thing, right? The one that guy has that lives with you?"

"Zach." Damon nodded. "Do you remember where he hid the vervain?"

I narrowed my eyes thoughtfully. "You guys were in a room…"

"That really narrows it down, Clary, thanks." Damon deadpanned.

"And Zach was like why you heeeeree, and you were like to spend time with you we're family L-O-L, and then he's like just get the fuck out so you strangled him and Stefan was like what you guys doing? Family bonding, woo! And then Zach is like crying on the floor, or something, I dunno, and he's like gotta tell you a secret. Which is like are you serious? Damon could totally hear you fuckers. But whatever, so then I think he… like… Hit something maybe that opened a wall? I dunno. It was like in a basement. Thing. He has a little garden."

Damon clearly looked unimpressed. "If I took you on a guide around the boarding house, do you think you'd remember which room it was?"

"Possibly." I really had no idea, the episode was an already vague memory as it was. "Buy me sugar."

"_Anything _for you." Damon's grin was dark.

* * *

We dropped the bags off at the hotel room and were currently putzing around a corner market.

"So, if I got 'property of Damon' on my ass, would you get a Minnie Mouse tramp stamp?" I wondered airily. To be honest, I'd been thinking on what kind of tattoo to get, and had a few ideas brimming. Most of which revolved around Minnie Mouse. And then _that _just kind of popped into my head.

Damon's head snapped in my direction, a large grin flying across his face. "Do _not _tempt me, Clary. I would gladly have Disney bullshit on me if it meant you'd walk around with my _name _on you."

It was _almost _worth it. The idea of Damon, acting like the big bad vampire, having a Minnie Mouse tattoo on his lower back for all eternity was probably the funniest thing that would ever happen in my entire life. He'd have no choice but to remember me _forever_. Pfft. I swung open one of the glass doors to the refrigerated drinks, feeling the craving for chocolate milk. Or strawberry milk.

Strawberry milk won the quick internal debate and I picked it up only to pause, my gaze tilting upward to the carton of whole milk that had, in bold black letters, written on it: _Celebrate life, whatever your style!_

I grinned. "Hey look, D!" I called, pulling the gallon of milk out. "This is for you. The milk says to celebrate life, whatever your style, so it's condoning your horrific deeds! Go on, Damon, you have the milk's permission to go on killing sprees!" The milk was out of my hands and hitting the floor before I even saw Damon move. He glowered at me as the milk broke open, pouring out everywhere. "Just like the people you killed, the milk lays dead in its own fluids."

Damon looked like he was either ready to vamp out and lunge at me or laugh. Like he wasn't sure which reaction was appropriate. "Why do I tell you anything?"

"Aw, don't feel bad, D. Only real friends take terrible memories and continuously mock them." I assured him happily, prancing toward the sugary drinks. "I make fun of you for not having humanity and you make fun of the fact that I was unloved as a child, ripping open deep emotional wounds that will cause me to need a lot of therapy while simultaneously snapping my neck."

"You make me sound like such an asshole." Damon stepped over the milk as I threw open the door, tossing a few bottles of Pepsi into the basket.

"It's called _Damon Dickery_, pumpkin." Hell, why not? Let's get some Mountain Dew, too!

"When did you become obsessed with Minnie Mouse?" Damon asked, watching as I threw drink after drink into the cart. I realized we wouldn't be able to bring all these with us… Unless we got a suitcase. We could cart around a suitcase, right?

Hey, if Damon was going to cart around a person, I should cart around a suitcase filled with soda!

"Ah… Two years ago? I met these two really hilarious girls during my first semester at college. They introduced me to video games, like Kingdom Hearts, which introduced me to Disney…" I said absentmindedly.

Damon scoffed. "I should have known, it would explain why you're so into it. You're just going through what every child goes through, the Minnie Mouse phase will pass." This wasn't a phase, it was my LIFE! Damon pulled me away from the sodas. "There's a drink you can try that would be like drinking all these at once."

"Is it unicorn blood?" I asked sarcastically. I would've known about a drink like that. He couldn't fool me.

"What kinds of energy drinks have you tried?" Damon ignored my question and I snorted.

"Monster. Once. And only a little bit. Do you really think anyone is going to let me have energy drinks, D?" I mean, _really_. I was already what people considered _inappropriately _hyper, with Pepsi I became a few steps up to _inconsiderate _and _WTF_-worthy. An energy drink? I couldn't imagine the level of awesome. But I was also a little worried. I'd been _behaving _myself, Damon hadn't _really _seen me spastic on sugar. "I'm fine with just Pepsi."

Damon leaned closer to me. "Clarissa," he purred lowly, his blue eyes bright, his smirk predatory. My heart bounced. "We are going to _indulge_."

Suddenly that's all I wanted to do. I wanted to emerge myself _completely _in feeling, I wanted to let it take over. And the worst Damon could possibly do is snap my neck if he felt I was too much.

"Take me to this legendary drink." I whispered causing his smirk to widen. He whirled me around, his hands on my shoulders, and guided me to _the Energy Drinks _refrigerated section.

The familiar pretty colors and shiny cans filled my line of sight. So when Damon pulled out the only one I considered to be ugly, a blue boring looking can with the word _HYPE _written in silver, I was a little disappointed. Damon merely smirked, opening the can with a satisfying _hiiiisk_, squinting those damn blue eyes at me like he knew how I was going to react.

I almost hoped I'd hate it just to surprise him.

I brought it to my lips, a bundle of excited nerves brimming as I tilted it back. A berry, almost cotton candy like, flavor slid into my mouth. A second later the familiar crackle of sugar was seeping through every inch of me and it was fucking _glorious_. I moaned happily. This was _the _best drink I had ever had in my entire life.

"Oh my God, Damon," I gushed, a giddy smile spreading across my face as the sugar continued to spill through me. I bounced on my heels, my grin growing. "You have _no_…" I realized suddenly. "_I _have no idea, actually! I have no idea what it must be like to drink blood, but _God_, can I imagine…" I took another very long sip, relishing in the way it coasted through me, before squealing and bouncing up and down.

"I think it's safe to assume you like it." Damon said calmly like, holy shit, how can anyone be calm? This was Earth shattering!

"I'm addicted, it's a crisis!" I said prancing around as I dumped all the soda out of the basket. "My friends think I've gone crazy! My judgment's getting kind of haaazy! My sleaze is gonna be affected if I keep it up like a love sick crack head!" I began shoveling Hype energy drinks into the basket. "What you got, Hype, is hard to find! I think about it all the time! I'm all strung out, my heart is fried! I just can't get you off my mind! Because your sugar, your sugar, your sugar is my drug!"

Damon didn't even seemed fazed! Didn't care! That meant he _accepted _me! I jumped up and down excitedly.

"You have to clean this all up!" One of the employees at the corner market suddenly came into view as I sprang around Damon, twirling and bouncing, knocking things off the shelves with the basket. "HEY! You damn kids! I'm talking to you!"

"We're not going to clean this up." Damon said pleasantly, steering me by the shoulders away from the employee. "We're leaving now. How about you count every item in the store, hmm?"

"I don't care what people say! The rush is worth the price I pay! I get so high when you're in me, BUT CRAAAAAAAAAAASH AND CRAVE YOU WHEN YOU LEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAVEEEEEEEE!" I belted, singing beautifully, really! "Beeeeeeecause your sugar, your sugar, your sugaaaaaaar IS MMMMMYYY DRUG!" I swung the basket full of Hype energy drinks into a passing business man and burst into laughter as he tumbled into the street, the cans flying everywhere. "I AM FREE!"

Damon spun me around and I beamed at him. "Where to now, beautiful? Vampire bar?"

"No," I gushed. "Not yet." I was so alive! "I want to play the piano! I want to burn down the city! LET'S GET NAKED, RUN THROUGH THE STREETS! Free all the animals!" I threw my arms around him, giddily rubbing my face against his chest, feeling suddenly affectionate. "I don't care what we do as long as you're here. Oh!" I drew back, bouncing on my heels, smiling at him brightly. "Let's go to the music store!" I was just so _happy_!

Because we were in the city!

And Damon was here!

And Damon was with me!

And I felt so alive!

And free!

And I was _everything_!

"God, I want to get so impulsive around you." Damon grinned, drawing me closer as his arms slid around my waist and I tilted my lips into the flirty smile he often used. I slithered my arms around his neck, my fingers sinking into his silky dark hair. His blue eyes locked onto mine as I leaned closer to him.

"You're a vampire, I can't die, and we're both impulsive with _nobody _to bring us down from whatever batshit crazy plan we cook up. Do you know what this means, Damon?" I playfully tugged on his ear as my fingertips danced across his skin and it was like little delicious explosions going off inside me at the contact. His blue eyes were a few shades darker, clawing at me.

* * *

Right now, Damon didn't care. By God, he didn't _care_. Clarissa was leaning into him, eyes bright and dancing, a flirty smile on her pretty face. She squealed suddenly, pulling him closer and rubbing her cheek against his affectionately. A grin flew across his face. He couldn't stop this feeling even if he wanted to. Clarissa had exploded into a bouncier version of herself and Damon _really _liked it. Her glee was so tangible it was inside of him, becoming his.

"You're just the greatest thing in the whole wide world, D!" She gushed in a chirping, delighted, voice, bouncing back from him. Her words spiraled through him, lighting everything up. He felt ridiculously smug. _Of course _he was the greatest thing!

Clarissa was his little human, his little hummingbird, and she had built herself a damn birdhouse right inside of him. There was no going back from this. Later, he knew, it would be an issue, when they left New York and he had to face the reality of the situation: Clarissa was mortal and he would be leaving her anyway once he freed Katherine.

But Damon wasn't going to worry about that now.

Oh no, Damon was going to focus only on Clarissa, their skyrocketing glee, and soak in every second of her company as she bouncily led him around New York. She deserved that much and so did _he_.

"You should get a hummingbird tattoo," Damon said, contemplating whether or not he should reach for her hand. While part of him wanted to, another part didn't. He liked her fluttering about around him, he didn't want to restrict her movements. And yet, he wanted to put his hands on her even more so than usual. He figured it had to do with her bright happiness. He _wanted_ it.

Clarissa fluttered back to him, wiggling both arms around his and clinging to him. "I was thinking MINNIE MOUSE!" She grinned widely. "A really simple design, like, the outline of her face with her bow being colored in. And then whoever becomes my one true love, can get _Mickey Mouse_! Isn't that just precious?"

"Sounds _dumb_." He said dismissively, irritated by the idea. "You're a hummingbird, not a Minnie Mouse. Your _one true love _is sugar, you don't _need _some stupid human boy to complete you. Hummingbirds are _free_, and like the hummingbird who goes from flower to flower for nectar, you fly around looking for soda." He was a fucking genius. Maybe he should sell advice. Tattoo advice.

Clarissa looked like she was considering his words for a breath of a nanosecond before snatching his hand and bounding down the sidewalk, instantly distracted. Grinning, he tugged Clarissa back to him and swept her up by the waist, spinning her dramatically around the sidewalk.

"I'm FLYING!" Clarissa shrieked, flapping her arms. _Christ_. "DREAMS DO COME TRUE!"

If asked, Damon would assure you that he had purposely flung Clarissa into a passing stranger (causing the two to topple to the ground, Clarissa cawing like a crow the entire time) and that he hadn't accidentally lost his grip.

* * *

I LOVED everyone's input in the reviews, even when you tell me what kind of day you're having! Just in case anyone has forgotten, what Clarissa (and now Damon) refer to as a someone being a "birdhouse", is just someone who holds importance in your soul. I KNOW CHEESEY AS HELL. Right now for Damon, he's not considering it in a romantic way.

**DO YOU GUYS WANT DAMON TO GET A TATTOO**? (Minnie Mouse tramp stamp? ;D)

I'm up totally up for pairing Jeremy with Anna. ...OR KOL! haha.

And now, I shall answer more questions.

**Q: WHY THE F DOESN'T CLARISSA HAVE VERVAIN YET?**  
This you guys have been asking me since... I think, chapter 3? I'M SORRY! 1) Damon doesn't know where the vervain is! 2) Stefan only had enough to give to Elena! 3) Even if Stefan attempted to give Clarissa jewelry with vervain in it, can anyone see her accepting it? She'd use that against Stefan. Like "Elena, your boyfriend is trying to give me jewelry! WHAT A PLAYER!" 4) When Damon gets the vervain, he's probably going to hold off giving some to Clarissa... Just because he likes to have the ability to compel her. I know. Vampire dickery.

**Q: Why hasn't Damon told Clarissa that Katherine is alive?**  
Despite Damon and Clarissa becoming buddy-buddy, Damon is still a secretive little vampire. That, and, at this point he hasn't even known Clarissa for a month and he's waited a 145 years to free Katherine. He might trust Clarissa, but he's not going to trust her with this. I think a part of him is afraid to tell her, too, doesn't want her to put any distance between them.

**Q: ALARIC**  
YES. Of COURSE! Alaric is Damon's BEST FRIEND! Damon-Clarissa-Alaric adventures WILL happen. Poor Alaric. He has no idea what's in store for him. If you guys ever want to see any kind of vampire dickery/have any kinds of mischief they can get into, lemme know! I'll make it happen ;D

**Q: Stefan/Clarissa friendship!**  
Eep! It'll happen. Without Damon having the feels for Elena, Stefan and Damon will patch things up eventually. Clarissa is the kind of friend who will hate, no questions asked, the people her friends hate. So Stefan-Damon feeling brotherly, Clarissa will accept her friendship feels for Stefan. But she's still going to make his life hell, because Clarissa is a dick. Ripper!Stefan and Clarissa friendship, on the other hand... Hmmm, well, we'll have to see!

**Q: Clarissa/Originals friendship!**  
I FORESEE CLARISSA BEING KILLED OFTEN!

**Q: Kol/Clarissa?**  
There will never be, at any point, any kind of love triangles. Not even one-sided feelings. Clarissa is a one Damon kind of gal.

**Q: DARISSA SOON.**  
Clarissa and Damon are both in complicated situations when it comes to romance! I KNOW, GUYS. I know. Damon will resist any kind of romantic feelings that may stir because, despite his flirty nature, I believe him to be extremely loyal. Emotionally loyal, anyway. Until he realizes Katherine isn't in the tomb, he's not going to get into a relationship with Clarissa. I CAN promise that they're going to come to the Katherine Being Alive discovery a lot (A HELL OF A LOT) sooner than in the show. But that doesn't mean they're not going to lose control and ravish each other every now and then in the meantime! ;D DGfleetfox gave me a great idea to help Damon's progression in his Clarissa feels. Thanks, lovely!

**Q: NO ANGST!**  
A few of you have had concerns about Clarissa and her tears/Clarissa hurting Damon. This is, first and foremost, a FLUFFY PRO-HAPPINESS fanfiction! Clarissa is not, at any point, going to become depressed. She's had some few breakdowns (it's hard waking up in a new body) and she's got her mommy issues, but she's a strong girl. Clarissa and Damon aren't going to get into petty fights for the sake of angst/plot. I PROMISE!

I REALLY wanted to get them to the pretend vampire bar, but with the storm upon me and my internet already flickering in and on (GDI SHITTY INTERNET) I want you guys to have something! THANKS FOR READING! :D


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, especially not Clarissa.

Guys I'm overwhelmed with how much everyone likes this story and all the wonderful reviews you've left me! Thank you SO much: JackieOh, ddluzelle, XxBriannaxX, AshlynVarela, Lissa, Shannyrox101 (I'm sorry, I don't know anything about Vampire Knight, but I totally mentioned it in there for ya!), Riplynne, Jasmine, Peace and Love831 (hey don't worry about it! as long as you still enjoy the fic thats all that matters :D), SomebodyWhoCares, Vampire I No Drama, vikki .dillard, janessa, Moka-girl, Kittywithfangs, Vanessa/nessafly1, Guest, CalmDisposition, MrsMusicAddict, 1llu510n, RealHuntress18 (OMG Darissaric, that's perfect!), DGfleetfox, Chanaenae17, MelissaIsLame (I LOVE your reviews! Shh no apologies! The energy drink idea is brilliant!), princessabbie10, Guest (2), Elizabeth Kimball, Sakae Doragon, Lana Scott, Cara, CallistoAngel, V, CacklingBlasphemy, Blue, ty, Kitsunekit75, Lucilla Tinwetari, karmen238, Sunblaze99, Cherokeefox20, Shelly C, padfootfaerie123, Chaos-and-Insanity, Courtney, GabbyCB, The Dark Lady55. You guys seriously motivate me!

If you guys have exams going on (Courtney and GabbyCB), good luck! Don't be too stressed out, here's another chapter for ya! I'm pretty sure this is the longest one I've written, hope you guys don't mind the length!

* * *

As the sun crept away, so did most of the sprinting glee that had me bouncing all over the place, as if the two were connected. I was still buzzing, but I could actually _focus_. …Not that I focused much as it was, but that wasn't the point. I had somehow managed to get myself a bunch of glitter bracelets. Yeah, you know, the colorful transparent tubes with the glitter inside of them that was really popular at the age eight? I was _so _cool. I had three on each wrist. I'm not sure if I stole them, had someone buy them for me, or if Damon got them. That part is a little hazy, I just remember seeing them and putting them on.

Whoops!

Now they're mine forever.

Like I would be buried in these.

And when I shook my wrist, the glitter swirled around and it was just _so freakin PRETTY_!

"Are you sure you know where you're going?" Damon could be the poster boy of impatient boredom. His tone was edged with irritation, his blue eyes idly drifting over the blur of faces and bodies that passed us by.

"Of course I do."

Where I was leading him had a lesser density of people, and soon there would only be us. The sun was nearly gone, and I delighted in the city's glow, feeling a whole new sense of liveliness filling me. Damon looked like he didn't share in my delight at _all_, he was cagily gazing around us.

"It's literally _underground_," I said cheerfully, wanting to hype him back up. "And the location changes. It's kind of neat, keeps _outsiders _from accidentally finding the place, you know? There's a few different types of vampire havens in the city—you've got the average tourist attractions, then there's the ones who are less known, but still open to the general public and for the rebellious teen getting back at their parents or going through the _vampire _phase. And then there's places like _The Red Spider_, for those who have adapted the vampire lifestyle. Most of them refer to themselves as psychic vampires, and don't necessarily have to feed on blood, but the psychic energy of humans."

Damon's blue gaze was lit with a mischievous glee, all his previous impatient boredom had fled his handsome face, a wicked grin curving slowly on his sinful mouth. "If this bar changes locations…" he began lowly and I pointed upward, to the single red light bulb hanging off a weathered building.

"I've been following them for three blocks now." His gaze slid from the light to me, and my smile became teasing. "_Really_, D, did you think that I was going to take you to _any _old pretend vampire bar? I have to one up the last experience you had in the city."

"How do you know so much about this?" Damon's blue eyes were becoming intense, his curiosity burning brightly. "I think you might have a bit of a vampire fetish, Clarissa." Despite his light, playful, tone his hooded gaze was damn near devouring.

I laughed, in an attempt to break the intensity of his gaze, but it came off breathy and my cheeks quickly grew warm. It's like I was stuck in some crazy romance novel version of a shitty vampire TV show with how stupidly undone he could make me with a single glance. But then the idea of Damon being on the cover of a steamy erotica, all buffed out with long flowing hair had me laughing harder. He tilted his head, the intensity shifting into more curiosity and I felt like I could breathe normally again.

"You forget, I _was _a terribly bored college student, and doing things to spite mother by spending rent money to hang out in _all the wrong _sorts of places was a passing hobby of mine." I grinned faintly. "I met a vampyre, spelled with a _y_. Her name was Adrian, a natural redhead but she dyed her hair funky colors so often that hardly anyone knew that. She was _wild._ She introduced me to this place and educated me about her subculture lifestyle."

Damon's grin became impish. "I knew a wild redheaded vampire too who taught me _a lot _about the upside of the vampire lifestyle." Dear God. "I was such a boring vampire, Clary."

"I was boring too…" I murmured with a shrug. "Now we're not boring. Now we're going into a fake vampire bar for the single purpose of choosing you a walking snack." I paused in my thoughts. Well, that had nothing to do with not being boring, it just meant I was a bigger asshole than I realized.

Oh. Freakin'. Well.

A smile caught my lips, my gaze flickering upward to the red bulb with the signature black spider outline spread across the front of it in dripping paint. My eyes slid back to Damon, my smile growing rapidly into a mischievous one. I took his hand, my heart leaping with excitement as his grin matched mine, and I quickly pulled him into the darkened, narrow, alleyway. Damon slid closer to me as I led him down a set of uneven cement steps, a rusted red door waiting almost ominously at the bottom. I lightly knocked.

A good five seconds passed before the door creaked open and a ghostly white face peered out at us with a look of slight irritated detachment. He was a willowy twenty-something year old, his brown hair in thick dreadlocks, neon green and bright red hair pieces pulled up in an unusual bun on the side of his head. He was donned in all black with dangerous looking leather spiked knee-high boots. His clear gray eyes flickered between us and his irritation grew. I knew how we looked to him: outsiders with expensive clothing who either knocked on the door for the shits and giggles or were seeking a thrill.

I could hear the Darkwave music pouring out from behind him.

"Yes?" He stared dispassionately, a single, perfect, pierced black eyebrow flicking upward.

"Invite us inside." I commanded in a soft, suggestive, voice. I smiled at him charmingly. I had no doubt that Damon wouldn't need the invite, but it was a vampire bar so I had to play it up anyway.

Willowy, as I was calling him, looked unimpressed. "What's the password?" He shot back, his tone drenched in sarcastic ire.

"There is no password," I said pleasantly, easing into amused confidence. A little Everett spice mixed in was always the best way to go when it came to these kinds of matters. "Now invite us inside."

His gaze assessed me for a hard minute. "I've never seen you two before." Willowy stated coolly.

"We're passing through." I murmured vaguely. "I was told _The Red Spider_ would be… accommodating."

Willowy didn't even blink, his expression impassive. But no longer irritated. I took this as a good sign. "You don't have a vial." He noted. Progress.

"That isn't my way." I shifted a shoulder upward, and nodded my head toward Damon. "I'm bound to this vampire." It was lame, but they had their own codes and this was how they operated.

With a curt nod, Willowy turned his flat stare toward Damon. "Please, come inside…" he murmured, slinking away, into the darkness of the bar. For the dramatic effect, no doubt.

"_Clarissa_," Damon's voice was hot in my ear, his arms winding around my stomach and torso slowly, pulling me against his chest, holding me snugly. My heart stammered and tripped inside my chest as I melted into him. God this was just so _comfortable_. His cheek was against mine as he rested his chin on my shoulder. "You can be very… _sexy,_ did you know that?" _Oh God_. His voice was a silky purr, and I could feel his smirk. Damon chuckled darkly. "Lead us inside, my little hummingbird."

Damon thought I was _sexy_, and I didn't think I'd ever come back from the reeling shock that jolted through me. He must've known my brain momentarily shut off because he stepped back from me and lightly pushed me through the doorway.

The bar was made up in colors of dark red with overtones of deep purple and black. The overall design was Gothic Victorian, worn deep red drapes hanging elegantly from the musty brick walls, pooling to the dark floor. Oil lamps hung about, flickering, a large gothic candle chandelier hung lowly in the center. _London After Midnight _was drawling out of the hidden speakers, the singer's hypnotic voice weaving through the compelling beat that I couldn't help but sway to. Damon crept closer, my back nearly touching his chest as I led him through the darkened bar. He lazily draped his arms over my shoulders and locked his knuckles with mine, drawing my hand into his, intertwining our fingers.

My heart bounced, a hazy warmth rolling over me.

We stood out badly amongst the sea of bodies, all who were dressed in the typical _gothic _fashion. Dyed hair, piercings, red, green, purple and black the only interchanging colors. There were top hats, corsets, frilly tutu skirts, lace, leather, heeled boots, and the usual Gothic Victorian dresses.

"Some of these fangs look _real_," Damon's breath slid over my neck and I shivered. I tilted my head toward him, my cheek brushing against his sending my heart into a flutter. Damon's blue eyes glowed a bright electric blue in the bar's odd lighting and I'd never seen him look so decidedly _supernatural_.

"Mmm. A lot of them get their canines filed." I murmured.

"And the necklaces with vials of blood in them?" Damon asked, his gaze following after a pixie like girl that glided past us, her contact-red eyes roaming across Damon.

"It symbolizes a few things—firstly, that you take part in the biting, whether you are the bitten or the biter, second that you're tested and _clean_. It's very important here." I explained lazily. "Sometimes the human will wear their blood, sometimes the vampire wears their favored human's blood. Depends on the wearer." I paused, feeling suddenly playful. "See anyone you want?"

"_Pick_." His voice was hungry in my ear, rough and commanding. A quiver of excitement tore through me. He wanted _me _to pick? I couldn't deny the feeling that rose from that. I felt kind of… _touched_.

I told myself the reason I didn't feel guilty about choosing someone to be his meal was because he wouldn't be killing them, and they'd probably willingly offer their veins. I totally hadn't twisted this into something sick in which I was feeling giddy that my vampire buddy wanted me to pick out his meal.

Nope.

No way.

Not at all.

Christ, I needed so much therapy.

"Lemme scope out the area first." I said after a moment or three passed us, and Damon slid around me, his arm curling around my neck as he pulled me closer to his side. He ran his thumb over my knuckles. I peered up at him, grinning. "Any preferences? Gender?"

"Surprise me." His smile was dark and predatory and it made my heart bounce to the beat of the alluring music. Damon's gaze slid toward the bar and then back to me. "Let's get a drink."

I let him pull me up to the black sleek bar which was styled like a large coffin. Wiggling up onto the stool, I smiled warmly at the bartender who was a lanky, tall, olive skinned girl with an assortment of colorful tattoos running up her arms, pointed studs in her plump lips and a buzz cut. Her smoky eyes gleamed warmly back at me.

"What can I get you two?" The bartender asked in the husky Brooklyn accent, her voice easily heard over the drawling music. "Vampire or not, still gotta be at the universal drinking age." She winked at me and I smiled wider.

"Completely human, and completely underage." I said with a small shrug. "Tell me what sort of sugary drinks you supply." She looked amused, ready to reply, but Damon scoffed, cutting her off.

"You're drinking with me." Damon said, leaning against the bar, facing me. My head was nearly level with his despite the fact that the stool was pretty high up. I snorted.

"No I'm not. Get me sugar wasted, we'll be at the same level of irresponsible. I'm not getting drunk for the first time out and about when I don't even _know _how I'll react to alcohol." It wasn't a debate or anything up for discussion. It just _wasn't happening_. And nothing Damon could say would change that.

"That's boring." Damon frowned at me. "You've never been drunk before? Oh come _on_, Clary, don't be boring. Drink with me!" His voice was more of a whine than anything.

"I'm the least boring person you'll ever meet," I assured him with a dismissive wave of my hand. "I don't _need _booze to be the life of any party, D. And I don't want to be compromised or not in control of my actions."

He rolled his pretty blue eyes, but his annoyance didn't seem that real to me. "You let your whims and impulsive nature control your actions." He pointed out. "Tattoos are _forever_, Clarissa."

"Everything is forever." I argued with a playful, secretive, smile. "And I'm not controlled by my impulsive nature if I embrace it and accept every consequence that goes along with it." Damon merely gazed at me.

The bartender leaned against the bar, almost in a flirty way, her smile wide. "Dynamite philosophy, babe, I think it'll take you far."

I laughed. "No, I think I'm headed into heaps of trouble," like Elena murdering me slowly with a blunt spoon. "But at least I'll have fun all the way down."

Damon grinned suddenly, his gaze lit as he slapped the bar. "I'll have a glass of your best alcohol and my lovely little Clary will have Pepsi. Coke. What_ever_." He slunk closer to me, his grin becoming more feral. "We have cause to celebrate."

The bartender's eyes twinkled. "Is that so?" She asked, pouring liquid into a thick blood red glass and sliding it in Damon's direction. "I'm guessing you're either getting or got a tattoo?" Her smile turned sultry. "Your first time, babe?"

Goddamn it. My cheeks warmed, despite myself, and I smiled sheepishly. "Getting a tattoo, and mm, yeah. First time." She slid over the second glass in my direction and I caught it easily. It was chilled to the touch and I slid it back and forth between my hands.

"The first time always hurts the worst," the bartender continued with a playful smile that made me really like her. "But a good kind of pain. Makes you come back for more." It would explain the excessive amount of tattoos. While I doubted I'd look good with sleeves, she rocked the image flawlessly. "How's your pain tolerance?"

My gaze slid in Damon's direction and he smirked tauntingly back at me. "_High_."

Given that I usually found myself shoved onto the floor, or being pushed off things, or having my neck snapped. I think it was safe to say my pain tolerance was above average. Way above average. Damon squished my face between his fingers, cooing at me.

"Don't look at me in that way, Claryberry. You know you like it." He drawled in a low purr and I swatted his hand away, my heartbeat quickening. There he goes again, with that devouring look. I should just sign myself up for a heart transplant now.

"Hurts so good, Damon." I deadpanned. "Kill me _harder_." His gaze gleamed wickedly and I knew whatever was about to come out of his mouth would be dirty and make me dizzy.

The bartender laughed a rich, throaty, laugh, turning my attention away from Damon to look at her. "Alright, what's your story?" She asked, plopping her chin in her palm, her smoky eyes glowing with amusement as she watched us. "I've been bartending at _The Red Spider _for three and a half years now, because the stories I hear are by far the best ones than at a regular bar. I live for this kind of stuff, so spill. You two are… Lovers?"

"He wishes." I smiled in amusement, dancing my fingers across the sleek bar. "And so do I. We're stuck in this friends-with-smoldering-erotica-book-worthy-sexual -tension loop. It's the most cliché thing in the entire world. He's the typical _sexy danger guy_," I quoted Caroline happily. "And I'm into the whole Disney True Love thing. We're at an impasse."

"We're not an impasse, you're just going to drag this out." Damon's set his now mostly empty glass down. "But I can wait. I'm patient. I have _all eternity _to wait for you to give up the goods. And you already said you would." He tilted his gaze toward the bartender. "She's all for being her own person and doing whatever whim will bring her happiness, _except _this one. The greatest pleasure of them all. Dirty, filthy, sex."

"I was half asleep and awestruck with happiness when I said that—and it was _mostly _a joke." I dismissed. "We'd just come from this party, and it was terribly boring, ten o'clock at night, and Damon says, 'let's just go to New York'. Seven and a half hours in the car later, here we are, and I was just _in the moment_."

"How long have you two known each other?" The bartender asked, amusement sparkling across her face. "Your chemistry is off the charts."

"Less than a month," Damon shrugged, sliding his empty glass toward her as I rose mine to my lips. The fizzling pop of the caffeinated drink spilled through me and I sighed happily.

"It has been one hell of a month." I said, delighting as the sugar brightened everything. "We mostly came to the city to kill my past self. Well—that and to drive his brother and my sister into a frantic worry..." I trailed off and she raised her eyebrows at me. "Have you ever crossed a point in your life where… You died and were reborn into a new body? And although you don't want anything to do with your old life, you still have trouble letting go? It's what this is for me. Goodbye past self, hello new, _free_, me. It's why I want to get a tattoo. This is my body, now."

The bartender's smile softened. "I do know how that is." She said, sliding Damon his now full glass back. "I went from being a Benjamin to an Olivia."

Damon and I raised our glasses to toast her and her smoky eyes gleamed happily back. We tapped glasses with the bottle of brandy she held up.

"Cheers to life altering changes that reveal our _true_ selves." Damon said with an impish grin and I laughed.

"Cheers to that, D!" I grinned at Olivia. "I'm Clarissa, by the way. Call me Clare, all my friends do. And this is Damon." Damon wiggled his fingers at her in a flirty manner.

"Nice to meet you guys." Olivia said warmly as I devoured more the soda. "Tell me about your worried siblings."

"Stefan is my younger brother, Elena is Clary's fraternal twin sister. Elena and Stefan are _dating _and are dramatically in love." Damon said with a scoff.

"They're both… very parenting and smothering and overly worried and everything is always a dramatic, angst-ridden, thing." I paused, a grin creeping across my face. "And get this, Elena could be Stefan and Damon's ex-girlfriend's double. She looks nearly _identical_. How's that for weird?"

"Love triangles." Olivia said with a shake of her head. "Sounds like a bad CW show." I burst into giggles and Damon sighed.

"It would've been called _Vampire Diaries_." I agreed, grinning widely at Damon. He flicked my arm painfully, pointedly refusing to look in my direction. Jerk.

"I would have pegged you to be the vampire," Olivia said after a moment, looking at me thoughtfully and I blinked in surprise. _Me_? Her smile was flirty and playful. "You've got this ethereal pull to you, babe." How _flattering_.

Damon clanked his glass onto the bar after downing the entire thing and slid it back over to Olivia. "You're barking up the wrong tree." He murmured. "_My _Clary is completely asexual." His blue eyes flashed in my direction, a smirk growing across his face. "Or should I say… she's strictly _Damon_sexual."

You little bastard.

Way to make me sound like a Damon-worshipping nut.

"I could be her _One True Love_." Olivia winked at me. "Love trumps sexual desire any day."

Aw. That was sweet. But God knew I was never going to be able to love anyone if Damon could completely fry my brain just by looking at me. I whined and drooped my head against the bar, inching my glass over to her with the tips of my fingers. "Hit me again, I want to drink until Damon isn't attractive anymore."

"I'll always be attractive." Damon assured me, sliding closer. We were nearly touching, his warmth teasing my skin. "It's _inescapable_."

"When I was sugar wasted before you weren't attractive." I countered, resting my cheek on the sleek surface of the bar, staring at him. Damon smiled darkly.

"Claaaary," he drawled. "When you were _sugar wasted _you couldn't keep your hands _off _me." Lies. All lies. Damon leaned closer, his dark smile curling into a savage one. In a squeaky high pitched voice he cried: "Oh Damon, you're the _greatest_ thing ever! Oh Damon, I just _adore_ you! Oh Damon, take me now you big stud!" _No way_. I didn't remember saying any of that!

I lifted myself off the bar. This goddamn vampire, he wasn't going to win this! I lowered my eyelids slightly, tugging my lips into the taunting smirk he usually wore, and leaned closer to him. Damon's gaze locked onto my face. "Clarissa, tsk, tsk," I purred back lowly, sliding my fingertips over his mouth, stroking his lips. "Shhh, don't speak. Remain scattered-brained, my little human, it amuses me. I arrogantly believe I can lure you into bed by giving you a smoldering vampire look. Mmm."

Damon's blue eyes were darkening by a few shades, his eyes scraping across my face slowly. His fingers curled around mine, keeping them pressed against his mouth, and gently nipped the tips. At the pinch of pain, my body gave a shudder of excited pleasure, my cheeks warming. _Gah_, damn it.

"Aww, D. I'm going to look at you like you're the only thing that exists while showering you with an endless stream of sweet words. I'm going to make it absolutely clear that I reciprocate your attraction strongly but, whoops, we can't do anything about it! Tee-hee." Damon continued to mock in a whiney voice, but his gaze stayed locked with mine. He kept my pulsing fingers in his. "About three things I'm absolutely positive: First, Damon is a vampire. Second, there's a part of him, and I knew how dominate that part was, that thirsts to continuously kill me. And third, I'm unconditionally and irrevocably sexually attracted to him."

He was pulling me in with those eyes of his, and I couldn't think. Olivia's throaty laugh sliced between us and I, realizing how close we were, sat back, pulling my hand from Damon's to grab the glass. A beat later, I realized _he just freakin' quoted TWILIGHT_. I'm SO freakin' done. I can't even with vampires. I can't even. I tipped the glass back, the cool fizzling soda hardly a distraction against Damon's weighted stare. My heart jerked and I realized I needed more sugar in my system.

"You weren't kiddin' about the sexual tension and smoldering looks, huh?" Olivia said, clearly amused by the whole thing. "Why don't the both of you compromise? You want true love, and he just wants you. _Date_. Maybe you'll get both."

I stared at Olivia in a state of surprise. _Date_? Damon and I? _In a relationship_?

I burst into peals of laughter.

"Clary, you _wound _me." Damon teased, placing a hand over his chest. "The idea of going into an exclusive relationship with me is that _laughable_?"

"We just—we're not _like _that," I said between breaths of laughter, shaking my head and grinning widely at Olivia. "It's purely sexual. There are no romantic feels, of any kind. I mean, we've got the whole buddy-buddy thing going, but…" My gaze softened on Damon. "And he's already had his true love. She was entitled and selfish and he deserved so much more, but she was _Damon's_. Nobody can replace that."

Something flashed across Damon's face quickly and I tilted my head—was that…? It was a similar look from when he was telling me about when his humanity turned back on. Guilt? Was that _guilt _I just glimpsed? But that didn't make any sense. What did he have to feel guilty about? Did something about me talking about Katherine make Damon feel… _guilty_?

I knew Damon still had the feels for Katherine. Hardcore. It was on his face when he talked about her, and it flickered in his gaze whenever Elena was around. I guess it was possible to love someone so strongly after such a long time, especially if she was his true love and shit… But there was this _nagging _feeling suddenly. _Something _was up.

"Have you decided what kind of tattoo you're going to get?" Olivia cut into my thoughts, as though sensing the need for a subject change and I shrugged.

"Nope. Still considering all the possibilities." I said with a faint smile. "Any suggestions for me?"

Olivia hummed softly. "Based on everything you've told me…" she trailed off, smoky eyes thoughtful. "I would suggest a hummingbird."

"_Really_?" I asked, surprised and Damon straightened. That was two people now, one who just met me! What the hell was up with this hummingbird thing?

"Why a hummingbird?" Damon murmured, narrowing his blue eyes a little. Olivia's grin turned a little smug.

"I'm inked up, I know a little bit about the symbols and significance of tattoos." Olivia said with her sultry grin. "Hummingbirds have the ability to fly backwards, symbolizing to look back on our past, but never dwell on it, that we should move forward. Something I think is going to be important for you, Clare. You don't have to kill your past. And then the whole reborn thing? Hummingbirds are a symbol of resurrection, they lower their heartbeats during the cold nights, seemingly dying, and come back to life again at sunrise."

Oh my _God_.

I gaped at Olivia, trying to think of something to _say_.

Damon's face burst wide open into a grin. "See? I _told _you, Clary! You're a hummingbird!" Because _I come back to life_. This was kind of eerie. "You're either getting a hummingbird, or my name. It's your choice." Pfft!

Olivia leaned closer, her smoky gaze sliding from me to Damon. "Hummingbirds are also the creatures that opens the heart." She said lightly, fixing Damon with a look and I raised my eyebrows. Hummingbirds were keyblades. I could totally be Sora. "They help heal the hurt that cause hearts to close. It's probably why we're all so drawn to you, babe," she winked playfully at me and my lips sprang upward. God, she kept flatteringme! "That and I've heard the wings of a hummingbird move in the pattern of an infinity symbol."

"I am forever." It was official. I'd been talked into it—I wanted a hummingbird tattoo.

We stayed to chat a little longer with Olivia, and ended up exchanging numbers after I took some pictures of the three of us together. I even gave her the orange glitter bracelet since orange apparently was her favorite color. A token of friendship. I needed to make more friends, _city _friends, branch out a little. And I _really _liked her.

"Let's dance, Clary." Damon demanded with a grin after giving Olivia the rich guy's card (that she raised her eyebrows to but didn't say anything). I brightened and picked up the glass and downed the rest of the soda with a content sigh.

Grabbing Damon's hand, I slid off the stool and pranced toward the middle of the room, in the midst of all the swaying bodies and chatting groups. Damon tossed me from him and with a lazy tug of his hand had me spinning right back into him, causing me to laugh, my hands splayed out on the front of his chest. I grinned widely as he twirled me about easily, my feet barely touching the ground—at least, that's how it felt. I shouldn't have been so surprised that he was an excellent dancer. We were doing a mixture of dances, all of which had no business being in a vampire bar, danced to this kind of music. It was a more of upbeat, swingy kind of dance.

And it was gaining us a lot of curious stares. Undoubtedly Damon's mastermind plan. Or his pathological need to stand out, especially since he was the only _real _vampire in this bar.

"Have you _picked _yet, Clarissa?" Damon asked, drawing me closer and swaying us about. "I thought maybe you would've picked the bartender, and I'm glad you _didn't_. If I have to endure another second of her eye-fucking you I'm going to snap her neck. It's _really _annoying."

Aw, I liked her. Poor Damon. He couldn't handle I was getting the attention and he wasn't. Haha. I win this round. I get _all_ the ladies.

My mouth flitted into a smirk, and I tugged on the front of his shirt. Damon allowed me to pull him closer, the sugar, the music, _him_, coursing through me like another heartbeat. Urging me to let loose. Not give a damn. "She can't help it, people crave what they can't have. My complete and total sexual indifference and aversion to dating is the ultimate challenge. People want to be able to change me, make me want them. It never works out." I wound my arms around his neck. "Plus it's _me_. People haven't _lived _'til they've met me."

Damon's irritation fell away to amusement, and he slid his hands down my sides, resting on my hips. _Christ_. "I know what you mean," he murmured, a smirk growing. "When people meet me, it's _heart stopping_."

"You take their breath away, D."

"Mind if I cut in?" A soft, composed, feminine voice murmured besides us, stealing my attention away from Damon.

A pretty, extremely pale, girl stood to our right, looking maybe a year or two older than my current age. She had chin length black hair that framed her heart shaped face and contact-purple eyes that were calmly fixed on us. She wore a knee length red and black long sleeved dress, with a lot of lace and frills and heavy looking three inch platform strapped boots. I untangled my arms from Damon, taking a step back, half surprised when his hands didn't budge from my hips.

"Be careful," I grinned at her, patting Damon's chest. "He _bites_."

"Duly noted." She murmured in a low voice, offering her hand to _me_. My lips parted in surprise—she wanted to dance with _me_? I tilted my head to look at Damon who was eyeing the girl. His blue eyes flickered to meet mine and he stepped back, his hands sliding from my hips.

"Don't have _too _much fun without me," he said with a suggestive grin, slinking away and I turned back to the girl, smiling at her cheerfully, accepting her hand.

See? I'm just rolling in the ladies tonight. Damon was two for two. He was seriously off his stud game. Or maybe vampires, pretend or not, just had a thing for _me_. A Clarissa fetish. That was probably it. The girl led me, by hand, away from the center, toward the edges of where everyone was dancing, where it was more dark and felt suddenly a lot more _private_.

"You and I need to talk," the girl, who I was calling Lady Darkness, or LD for short, murmured, swaying her body to the music.

I really had expected her to start waltzing with me, I wasn't sure why. So with a shrug, I copied her movement. I was amused. We skipped over names and dove straight into the dramatic 'we need to talk' stage. At the last drawling of whatever Darkwave band was blaring, the music switched to something a hell of a lot more _electric _and I recognized _Angelspit _almost immediately.

"Rumors have been circulating about you and your… vampire." She said after a beat, gracefully swirling around me. She didn't believe Damon was a vampire, if the way she said the word was any indication. My amusement grew. "Outsiders unaccompanied by another have never walked into the sanctuary before. We've had others from different havens—even out of state, but they clearly _belonged_."

Translation: You don't fit in, get out.

"My vampire doesn't really get caught up in fads or trends." I said easily. "And he has terribly expensive taste in clothing."

"Do no mistake me, we would never turn away one of our own, but the circumstances are… suspicious." LD said smoothly and I was becoming bored of this. "I would like to know who told you about _The Red Spider_…"

She murmured on and on, but I couldn't help but think how _cliqued _and high school-y all this was. Never mattered who you were or what you believed in, at the end people who were different from you were looked down at. I caught the last half of whatever she had been saying.

"…hasn't appeared to have marked you, from where I can see."

"It's a spiritual bond, not physical." I said dismissively, the text alert on my phone chiming. I pulled it out, finding a text from Damon: _Pick someone and lets go. I'm bored and hungry_. My lips twitched upward and I texted back: _the girl I'm dancing with. She doesn't believe you're a vampire. AND she's super pretty._

"I could change that." LD said lowly, purple eyes bright, as she glided closer to me and I was more confused than ever. Wasn't she just going on about how she wanted us to G-T-F-O? And now she's suggesting I let her bite me?

Was this a test?

Warm fingers slid across my mouth and it took me a moment to realize it was _Damon_ who was suddenly behind me. A jolt rushed through me as he pulled me flush against his chest, his other hand slowly trailing across the front of my stomach, keeping me pinned to him. My body reacted instantly, a tug of startling _want _warming in the pit of my stomach, goosebumps forming across my arms. The _fuck_.

"Clarissa is _new _to the vampire world," he murmured, his breath hot on my skin. "She's a virgin in every aspect of the word," his hand moved, leaving a scorching trail after it, as he tangled his fingers in my hair. My heart hummed with the music, my cheeks hot. With a sharp tug, he tilted my head, forcing me to expose my neck. Holy God, Damon. "She's never had anyone… pierce her flesh with their fangs." Why was he making this sound so… _dirty_? My breath hitched, _excitement _rushing through me. "And so we're looking for someone to come join us."

LD was looking a little flustered and so very human suddenly (Damon had that effect, I knew), her eyes trailing across my neck, and then moving toward Damon. "I have never received such… a generous offer." Oh good, she was keeping up her vampire persona. Wouldn't it be hilarious if she turned to be a vampire pretending to be a vampire? "I… must take a moment to think this over. Please, excuse me…"

Damon spun me around, his blue eyes trailing LD who glided away from us. "If anyone is going to bite you, it's going to be _me_." His gaze flickered down, pinning me, and I could totally tell by his crabby tone that he needed some noms in him.

I, too, get pretty crabby when hungry or craving sugar.

Amused, I poked his chest. "A vampire offering another vampire their human is the highest compliment _ever_, D. Boarding on a romantic gesture." Damon smacked my hand away from him. _See_? Crabby.

"I don't care." He half growled. "Maybe I should just bite _you_, since you're _bound _to me anyway. Why shouldn't I mark you as mine?" His dark blue gaze ripped all the air out of my lungs and my heart completely stopped. He was _serious_ about biting me, I realized.

The idea of Damon pulling me close and sinking his teeth into my neck had my cheeks burning almost feverishly as that strange electric heat pulsed through me. Oh _God_, why was I _glamorizing _the idea of being bitten? The thought of his mouth on my neck, _drinking _from me, made my knees weak and Damon jerked me against him, his arm curling around my waist, keeping me pinned to his warm body. I choked on a gasp at the contact, a blazing igniting inside me. His blue eyes devoured me, brushing across my face with a burning intensity that threw me into a hazy blanket of warmth.

"You want me to," he murmured lowly, his voice like velvet against my skin, slithering over every inch of me. Damon tilted his head, his searing fingertips grazing over my neck, setting a fiery trail as they stroked over where my pulse beat frantically. An excited hunger coiled through me tightly and I could scarcely think, hardly breathe. "Say the word, and I'll do it."

"No," I struggled, pressing my palms flat against his chest. I could feel his heart beating through his shirt. "I am not a snack. You bite me and I'll bite you back." I was fighting through the hazy heat that settled over my thoughts like a thick fog, desperately trying to snap myself out of this.

The dark chuckle that emitted from his throat, rumbling in his chest against my palms, had my fingers curling in his shirt as I relied on him to keep me standing. Dear fucking Christ, I was not going to survive Damon. I was so hyperaware of every inch of me that was pressed into him, and his hand moving up my waist was sending jolts of hot pleasure throughout my entire body. His fingers ghosted, achingly slow, up my throat until his thumb was brushing over my lower lip.

_God help me_.

"You say that as if that would _deter _me," Damon's dark blue eyes were a vast pool of hunger, his low, coaxing, voice the only thing I could hear. "But I have fantasized about your mouth doing a thousand different things to me, and God, Clarissa, biting is definitely one of them." I was on the verge of hyperventilating, my mind spinning.

"Damon," I breathed, not sure if I was trying to push him away or pull him closer. My fingers shook. "Not here." I realized I wasn't telling him _no _exactly. "You're hungry, and I've picked out your meal and after you're satisfied and full, if you still want to bite me… I don't—I don't know."

His fingers fell from my face and wound around my wrist, gently caressing where my pulse met skin. Strangely enough, I found myself calming down at the soothing strokes of his fingertips. "If I let go of you, are you going to fall to the ground?"

My cheeks heated and the coil of needy desire that had burnt tightly around me was unraveling quickly. God_damn _it, he knew. _He knew _the effect he had on me, and right now that _sucked_. I was mostly annoyed with myself. Why did this keep _happening_? It's like I had forgotten where we were, and I wondered how I could have heard him so clearly when he spoke so quietly with the music blaring?

"It's fine D, my ass always takes a beating when I'm with you." I threw back, flashing him a sweet smile as I wiggled out of his hold. His gaze burned into me just as LD glided back to us.

"It's a bit… unorthodox. Leaving the sanctuary, with new comers." She said softly, despite holding a black leather and velvet handbag with an image of bats surrounded by a cameo of satin ribbons and lace. She also was now wearing a short black top hat with red silk around the band, a veil of lace made to look like spider-webs hanging from the edges of the hat.

She was obviously leaving with us. And I noticed she'd taken to calling us _new comers_ and not outsiders. Chaaa-ching.

"Clary wants you to join us," Damon said with a wave of his hand, easily pulling the pretend vampire closer and swaying around her. "She's impossible to deny. You may try, but we all know you're leaving with us, and you're going to have the _time _of your life."

"I'm gonna go say goodbye to 'Liv." I grinned, bouncing through the throngs of pretend vampires toward the bar.

Olivia was in the middle of serving up a few drinks to a pair of girls with bright pink mohawks. Though I didn't have to wait long, Olivia had noticed me and was smiling warmly, moving closer.

"Hey, babe, what can I get ya?" She asked and I grinned wider.

"A hug, I'm gonna jet." I held my arms out and Olivia's smile grew. She curled around the side of the coffin bar and scooped me up into her long, tattooed, arms. She must've been at least five inches taller than Damon, because I got a face full of boobs.

"Keep me in the loop of any developments with your sexy danger guy." She said, squeezing me and I laughed.

"Of course. And don't worry, I'll visit!" I promised, because I had a feeling this would be the first of _many _city weekends. Maybe we could bring Elena and Stefan here and reveal his big secret! Ha! "Hey, and no joke, if you change your mind about seeing your parents again, give me a call if you want the support. I'd come to Queens with you and TP their house if they react bad."

Olivia released me from the hug, swooped down and planted a wet kiss on my cheek. "Thanks, babe, that means a lot. I'd definitely give you a call if the thought crosses my mind."

I beamed at her. "Later, 'Liv!"

"Buh-bye, babe!"

I skipped back toward the exit, where Damon and LD would be, and nearly jumped out of my skin as Damon materialized in front of me.

And he was furious.

His expression betrayed nothing, but his blue eyes were slits and his fingers curled around my wrist with an ironclad grip. The dark anger that rolled off him in dangerous waves had me scrambling to figure out what had happened in the two freakin' seconds I'd been gone. I quickly followed him (or I'd be dragged) out of the bar and up the cement steps. It was dark out, the alleyway lit by a single red light bulb that flickered, casting an eerie, sinister, red glow over us. LD was standing, like a ghostly figure, by the wall, her purple eyes glowing in the light, fixed on us.

Damon spun around, his fingers pressed tightly into my skin. "I don't want you talking to her ever again." He growled and I stared at him in offended surprise. "Do not _test _me right now, Clarissa," he hissed my name. "I can compel you. In fact, I may just do that. I can make you never want to talk to her, I can make you forget she even fucking existed!"

I pressed against his chest but he didn't move. "You haven't eaten since breakfast this morning, so go eat. I get it, you're crabby. I get the same way." I tried to keep my voice level, tried to keep the anger from my voice. Because the last thing I wanted to do was to be pissy at Damon when he was having a vampire spat. I'd probably wake up on the ground with a broken neck.

"Shut up," he snapped. "This has nothing to do with being _hungry_. This is fucking stupid, you know that? You're okay with _her _putting _her mouth_ on you, with being all over you, but not me? She can _kiss_ you, and I can't? What the _fuck_?"

Understanding flickered to life, draining away the building anger. He wasn't quick to anger because he was hungry, and this was beyond him being _jealous_. Damon was insecure. Coming second to everyone who should have loved him the most: his father, Katherine, _Stefan_—I _understood _what this was, and why he was reacting this way.

"What does it matter what she does? What anyone does? It'll never be more than a passing moment of friendliness to me. While all you have to do is look at me, and suddenly my world is revolving around you." It was overly cheesy and stupid, but sometimes people, _Damon especially_, just needed that kind of talk. To feel special. And God knew it was fucking true. "I get it, D. I really, really, do. And I'm telling you, no matter what, nobody is gonna replace you. You're the _only one _who will _ever _know all my secrets, who I really am." I tossed him a grin. "'Sides, nobody kills me intimately like you do."

Like a switch, all his rage was gone and Damon was full swing cocky and arrogant again. "Fucking right. I popped your death cherry, and you know what they say, once you _pop _the fun just doesn't stop!" He winked playfully at me and I grinned, relief whooshing through me.

I glanced at LD who was merely standing there, watching. "Did you compel LD?" I asked as Damon led me toward the still girl.

"LD?" He questioned. "Does everyone have to have nicknames?"

"Lady Darkness, and yes. Yes they do."

"My name is Noah." LD said in her low voice, looking disinterested. I grinned faintly, I dug the name.

"I'm Clare." I introduced myself warmly. "And I'm sure you already know this is Damon. You hungry? I know this great place close by. I mean, first D's gonna eat… He's getting kind of cranky."

"Clary," Damon groaned. "Shut up. I'm not getting _cranky_."

"I apologize, I meant emotional." I smiled pleasantly. "Kind of like a jealous thirteen year old girl—" Damon shoved me hard enough that I went flailing to the ground. I moaned in pain, rubbing my now sore butt. "I can't help it if everybody wants me, D! I'm like meth to you vampires. And you know what they say about meth. Not even once."

"I'm going to kill you." Damon announced, throwing me a look. He couldn't hide the amusement in his gaze, though. He turned back to Noah, flashing her a charming smile. "Clary thinks I won't have to compel you, and I'm _very _curious to see if she's right."

"Compel me?" Noah asked, raising her eyebrows.

"Mind-control. Vampire shit." I said from the ground causing Noah to sigh.

"I am starting to believe that you two are mistaken about what we _are_." She said quietly, slight disappointment flickering across her pale face.

"Clary explained loosely how you… human vampires are." Damon tilted his head, squinting down at her. "It's interesting."

"Excuse me," Noah said coolly, her eyes narrowing, obviously offended. "I'm going back to the bar. This has been a mistake." Damon's grin was feral as he stepped aside in a show of faux gentlemanly acceptance.

I stumbled to my feet, brushing my pants off, as Noah merely stood there. A moment passed.

She blinked.

Confusion flickered across her face, red mouth parting in surprise. "I don't…"

"Hey at least he didn't compel you to smack yourself in the face." I chimed cheerfully. "He's a bit of a dick." And as if we'd rehearsed this, Damon flashed her a fanged grin.

Noah's eyes widened, her mouth falling open, as total shock flooded her face. "You're…"

"The undead kind of vampire." Damon said cheerfully.

Noah groaned, her shoulders slumping as she buried her face in her hands. "You must think we're all a bunch of _fools_." She muttered into her palms, voice muffled.

"No!" I assured her quickly. "Coming to _The Red Spider_ was a total highlight that D's been excited for since like… 11PM last night! Really! You guys have your own lifestyle, and I totally get it. Doesn't make it any less just 'cause you're a _different _kind of vampire!"

"Mmhm," Damon agreed cheerfully. "No judgment."

She lifted her head, looking at us with wide purple eyes. "I…" She swallowed. "Why did you choose… to reveal yourself to _me_?"

"'Cause you're pretty and looked like you could use some reckless fun out in the city with us." I said happily causing pink to quickly dust Noah's pale cheeks. Totally wasn't gonna tell her it was because I was a brat who wanted to shove a real vampire in her face. Nope.

"There… Must be some kind of catch." Noah continued in her soft voice, and while her expression was still awestruck, her gaze was thoughtful.

"We figured you wouldn't have any objections to being a walking snack." I said with a slight shrug. Her eyes widened again. "Totally not gonna die or anything. No bad side effects. I mean, D can go out and compel someone and then have them forget but… wouldn't it be more fun this way? As long as you dig it, of course."

"And if I don't… dig it?" Noah asked carefully, her gaze flickering back to Damon.

"Then we part ways and you forget this ever happened, that you ever met us." Damon promised, though I think he might compel her to agree and make her forget anyway. She released a long sigh.

"But if I agree, can I keep my memories? You can compel me to never tell anyone, I don't mind that, but…"

"Deal." Damon agreed lazily, veins crawling across his face. He plucked up her wrist, shoving back her long red velvet sleeve, and brought it to his mouth. She gasped, her face twisting with pain, but she didn't move.

Fifteen minutes later Damon and I were seated comfortably in a booth across from a still very stunned looking Noah. Damon's mood had improved by tenfold so I was totally right in thinking being hungry had made him crabby and influenced his mood swings. Hell yeah.

"You can eat?" Noah asked quietly. The menu was open in front of her, but she hardly looked at it. Damon smirked, clearly enjoying her wide eyed attention.

"Damon can do eeevveeraaaay-thaaang." I said, flipping through the glossy menu. "He's like The Sims on cheat codes. Actually, he's like Loki playing The Sims. He puts people in pools and then deletes the ladders." Noah nodded, grim understanding flickering across her face.

"I suppose I shouldn't have assumed otherwise." She said, eyes falling down to the menu finally. I was having trouble deciding between mashed potatoes and cheese fries. "You're just so… Well, _domesticated _around Clare…"

"Domesticated?" I repeated. _Damon_? _Domesticated_? "Maybe if he'd wear the collar and kitty ears…" I trailed off thoughtfully, a grin sliding across my face. Damon scoffed and yanked a lock of my hair. "Ouch! No, but seriously… He kills me all the time. Damon is far from domesticated."

Noah's eyes snapped up to meet mine, her mouth opening when a high pitched whistling sound went off followed by a muffled: "_Kirk to transporter room, report_." She blushed. "That's my… text alert…" she murmured, opening her gothic bag and digging through, pulling out a pretty pink flip phone, which had a tiny bell attached to it with a metal charm of a chibi figure and an engraved metal plate that read: _Vampire Knight_. I grinned widely.

"Dude, that is so awesome. I didn't even think of having special ringtones for texts!" Now I wanted it. "Where'd you get that?"

"No." Damon frowned. "I can barely tolerate the jingle you have now. I'm not going to sit here and listen to that crap go off every two seconds. I'll end up breaking your phone."

He's just jealous nobody texts him. Because he's a loser. A really old loser.

"It's my friend, she wants to know what I'm doing…" Noah murmured, chewing on her lower lip adorably. "What should I tell her?"

"That you met a vampire and his human and you're chillin' with them at a diner." I said with a shrug and she blushed again.

"Oh, um… She doesn't… She doesn't know about my lifestyle…" she admitted with an embarrassed half smile.

"Mmm, she's the Elena in your life." Damon said knowingly and I snorted.

"Elena is my sister, and she's dating _his _brother. She doesn't know about vampires either." I explained loosely with a dismissive wave of my hand. "Take a picture of Damon and send it. It'll explain for itself without lying."

Noah perked up to that idea. Well, her version of perked up. A small smile twinkled across her pretty face. "Smile, Clare."

I smiled brightly at her phone, delighted. The fake shutter clicked loudly. Our waitress, Candi, with a heart dotting the I, chose that moment to return, smiling at us warmly.

"Y'all decided?" She asked in her cheerful Southern twang.

"You guys know what you want?" I asked, and to Noah's nod, I grinned at Candi. "I'll have a plate of mashed potatoes with gravy, and another plate of cheese fries. A large plate. With a _lot _of melted cheese on it. And a Coke."

"Mmm delish!" Candi wrote it down with a bubbly smile. "Some bacon on that?"

"Yes." Damon grinned charmingly at her. "Upgrade them to waffle fries, as well."

"Done." Candi winked and turned her friendly gaze toward Noah. "And for you, cutie?"

"A strawberry shake for me." Noah said with a tiny, embarrassed, smile.

"Oh! Oh! Me too! I want one too!" I bounced in the seat, daring either one of them to deny me this! Damon merely snatched the menu from me and handed it to an amused Candi. Hell yeah! I get a milkshake!

"I'll be back with your drink." Candi said with a wink, sashaying away. Damon's gaze followed after her.

"When she comes back, you should tell her you're craving some _candy_." I quipped, drumming my finger against the table, so excited about the milkshake I didn't even care if Damon wanted to be gluttonous.

"I waaaant caaaaandy," Damon sang with a feral grin. I tapped my hands to the beat of the song. "Go to see her when the sun goes down, ain't no taster girl in town. You're the girl, what the waiter ordered. So sweet, you maaake my mouth water." Damon continued, playfully changing the words and I grinned at him. Noah regarded Damon with her lilac contact eyes and his grin turned flirty. "Don't pout, Gothy," he purred. "We're merely teasing. I only want to feed from _you_."

Her expression didn't change—or maybe there was a flicker of relief in her gaze, I wasn't sure. I was caught up in the odd feeling twisted in my chest, because Noah was reminding me that I _shouldn't _be so nonchalant or playful about the whole Damon-Using-People-For-Food thing. I mean, her _lifestyle _was vampires, she was clearly obsessed, and even _she _looked unnerved by it. So what the hell did that say about _me_?

"_And if the sun comes up will it tear the skin right off our bones?_" Her phone's ringtone went off, drawing my attention to it."_And then as razor sharp white teeth rip out our necks I saw you there—" _

"I apologize," she murmured, cheeks pink. "It's my friend." I swiped the phone from her hands before she could ignore the call, amused by the song.

"_Someone get me to the doctor, someone get me to a church! Where they can pump this venom gaping hole and you must keep your soul like a secret in your throat!_"

I flipped the phone open. "Hiiiiya! This is Clare, who is this?"

A high pitched squeal met my ears and Noah looked horrified.

"_Clare? The mega hot chick in the pic Noah sent me? HOMIGAWD! I'm Jenny!_" The girl on the other end practically screamed into the phone. Mega hot? Sweet. "_How did you guys meet!? How long have you two known each other?!_"

"Maybe for like a half an hour, we were at a bar. Noah asked me to dance, we hit it off, and now we're chillin'." I gushed cheerfully, hyped up by the Jenny's enthusiastic response. Damon rested his chin on my shoulder, as if bored, playing with a lock of hair and I was suddenly distracted.

"_My Noey initiated? About time! She's so shy, y'know? You be good to her, okay, don't you hurt her!_" Jenny threatened warmly and Noah, who could easily hear Jenny, held her hand out for her phone, murmuring a quiet apology.

"I can guarantee anything I do, _Noey _will enjoy," I purred into the phone, winking at Noah who turned scarlet, pulling the phone from my hand hastily. Ha! This was so much fun! No wonder Damon does it all the time!

"Call you later, Jenny," Noah breathed into the phone. "Bye!" She nearly threw it into her bag just as Candi returned with my soda.

Delicious soda.

"Why can't you have ringtones like that?" Damon wondered after a beat passed between us, still leaning against me. "That vampire one would be much more fitting than Lion King." He tiled his gaze toward Noah. "She gave me a _Lion King _ringtone."

"Maybe if you weren't cooking up devious schemes, baring your ambitions at me, I wouldn't." I said lightly, stirring my drink with a large red straw. "You ever think about that? Huh?"

"Are you gay?" Noah suddenly blurted, her eyes wide as she stared at me.

"Ecstatic!" I agreed brightly with a nod. "I was born that way."

"She means, are you into chicks." Damon clearly knew I had been teasing, so I don't even get why he had to ruin my fun.

"Girls, boys, it doesn't really matter." I said shrugging the shoulder Damon wasn't using for a headrest. "I'm disinterested in both."

"I see, I apologize for just… just blurting that out." Noah shifted, as if uncomfortable, and I laughed.

"Don't worry about it," I said breezily as my phone's text alert chimed.

Jeremy: _you still alive_

Jeremy! I brightened, happy to get a text from my new brother.

I texted back: _went to a pretend vampire bar, hanging out with a pretend vampire! Hows the lena situation_

Jeremy: _im not even gonna ask. and shitty. maybe you should pick up one of hers or stefans calls._

Me: _maybe later. Gonna get a tat._

Jeremy: _are you serious_

Me: _Yup_

Jeremy: _whose idea, sorry but I gotta ask_

Me: _mine. Completely mine. Getting a hummingbird, cuz they represent looking back at the past but moving on._

Jeremy: _elena is going to flip but i think if its something youre 100% sure about then maybe it's a good idea. Send pix when you get it_

I drummed my thumbs over the keypad thoughtfully. Jeremy's acceptance made me feel… warm inside, happy, and I realized I had been anxious about his reply. I _wanted _him to approve. I released a puff of air.

Me: _why don't you sketch me a hummingbird. It'll be a Jeremy Gilbert original tat._

I chewed on my lower lip, waiting for his reply. I realized if I wanted to brand this new body as my own, I wanted it to be from the design of my new family. It would tie everything in perfectly.

Jeremy: _idk c… i haven't drawn in months…_

Ugh.

Me: _super simple design. Like the basic outline of a hummingbird. Pleaaase_.

Jeremy: _OK. give me like an hour._

Me: _thanks J it means everything_

When I pocketed my phone, I realized a plate of mashed potatoes were in front of me and Damon was picking at the cheese fries, his blue eyes sliding to meet mine. I burst into giddy laughter.

"J's gonna draw me the hummingbird," I blurted out excitedly and Damon flicked a fry at me.

"If you hate it, you'll be stuck wearing it five-ever, Clary."

I didn't care.

* * *

Mashed potatoes, cheese fries, and a strawberry milkshake was the worst possible combination I could ever think of. Never do it. It was a three out of ten experience. I, of course, had juggled between all three of them at once, trying to eat fast before the food hit my stomach and made me full.

Now I wanted to die.

"You deserve this." Damon let me know happily, lifting his mouth from Noah's wrist. They were both hovering as I leaned miserably against a building, and I was eighty-five percent sure I was about to barf everything back up.

"Fuck. Off." Fucking damn it, Damon. Nausea swarmed painfully and I was feeling woozy, clammy, and pale. Noise made it so much _worse_, I just wanted to curl up and die.

"We have to get her to throw up." Noah said quietly. "It is the only way."

"No," I groaned. "I don't wanna throw up." My stomach lurched at the thought.

"Then you're going to be stuck feeling like this and we'll have soda and get tattoos without you." Damon sighed, and I moaned in pain.

"Hate you." So much. _So much_.

"I wonder what color you'll puke. I hope it's bubblegum pink." Damon continued, ignoring my nauseated cry. "What do you think, Gothy? Shall we place bets on colors?"

These fucking assholes, I swear.

"No, I won't enter a bet with a vampire." Noah refused softly. "I fear what I may lose if you win."

"Maybe it'll be like confetti." Damon continued, amused. "It'll be like a _parade_, Clary!"

"A parade of death and misery." I groaned, resting my forehead against the brick wall. I wanted to _die_, holy shit.

"Welcome to the Black Parade." Noah deadpanned and I burst out laughing so hard that I doubled over and puked. Oh GOD, why?!

"That was the most unattractive thing I've seen in twenty years." Damon broke the silence, his tone cheerful. Dick. "I fucking said it would be pink. Everyone loses, I win."

"I never agreed to your bet," Noah said as Damon dropped her wrist. Her purple eyes flickered to me. "But I did say throwing up would make you feel better, didn't I?" She smiled faintly. "I win _more_." Damon threw her a look and then turned his gaze to me, Noah's smile growing.

I straightened, suddenly feeling a thousand times better. I patted my stomach. "Now I need food."

"Of course you'd want to eat," Damon squinted his eyes at me. "You're fucked up. That's gross." Pfft!

"My stomach is empty now, I just threw up everything! I need delicious noms to sustain me!" I mean, _really_. "Bring me to the Burger King."

"There's a McDonalds a block from here." Noah offered and I stomped my feet as childishly as I could.

"I am the King of Burgers, I shall have it my way!"

"This is what I have to deal with." Damon said, turning to look at Noah as though exasperated. "All day. Every day."

I bounced between my vampire and my new gothic friend, linking my arms with theirs. "You love every damn second of it, so don't even." Like why you gotta front, D? "He hasn't had this much fun in like… a century. I swear."

"Mmm, and without me, you'd be rotting away." Damon dismissed with a lazy smirk. "You've never had _any _kind of fun 'til you met me. I set you _free_, hummingbird."

"I'd follow you into the desert after being parched, if you asked me to, my blue canary." I agreed, just to one up him and poke a hole in his nonchalance. We both knew I was tons of fun before him. So much fun that Vampire Diaries decided I needed to shake up their world and drag me here. His blue eyes gleamed at me.

"Blue canary?" Noah's gentle voice curled at the edges of my attention and I turned my head back to her.

"Mmhm! D's my blue canary! He's a dickish canary, though." He was probably the worst blue canary ever. I mean, he kills me. That's the opposite of what he's supposed to do.

"What does it mean…?"

"Maybe one day I'll tell you." I grinned at her.

"I can't believe I'm getting you Burger King." Damon muttered, shaking his head.

"Oh boo frickin' hoo, D." I huffed. "I'm only gonna have a burger, I won't get myself sick. Plus it's not like you're _actually _spending any money, so just stuff it."

"He's not? The credit card you used…" Noah began.

"Not mine." Damon said with a shrug. "Compulsion. It's useful."

"Don't worry, Noah! He's a rich business guy. We're not taking advantage of anyone." I assured but at her uneasy expression, and the fact that she was chewing on her lower lip, caused my smile to falter and confusion to rise.

"You're… still taking advantage of him. You don't know his life story. Using his card—he might need that money, despite being well off. Or perhaps it'll cause him to be in trouble with a significant other, or his work…" Noah said softly, a bit anxiously, like she was a little worried that Damon would snap her neck for bringing up her opinion on this. "It's… it's _wrong_."

Wrong?

_Those people _were wrong. Those people and their cold smiles, they were wrong. And dead inside. I'd existed, not lived, for almost eighteen years, feeling _nothing_. How could Noah say that to me? How could Noah _feel _that way, with the way she was dressed, with what she believed in—what she believed she _was_? How could she look at them, and see a reason to believe we shouldn't use their money? What was he going to use it for? Handmade chocolates from France? On a mistress he was probably with at the hotel?

Damon's fingers slid down my hand, threading with mine, and all the bitter hurt that had been brewing quickly fled. I smiled at Noah. She didn't _know_. And that was okay. I was glad she saw the world that way.

"You're right, Noah," I laughed warmly, uncaring if I was lying to her face. "I guess I didn't think about things that way. Wow, kind of makes me feel like an ass."

She wanted to believe I was being honest, and so she did. She visibly relaxed, smiling back at me, and I realized that somewhere along the way I had reached a place where I was unable to come back from. I would have felt isolated, if not for Damon's hand linked with mine, reminding me that we were on some sort of island that nobody else wanted to follow us to.

Nobody _human_, anyway.

Maybe I could make some vampire friends, instead.

I turned toward Damon, his blue eyes knowing, a smirk playing across his face. I grinned back at him. I wasn't going to feel bad if he compelled Noah. I just wanted to have _fun_.

* * *

"You look ridiculous." Damon snatched the cardboard Burger King crown from on top of my head and placed it on his own. He flashed me a smirk. "Doesn't it just look _good _on me?"

I flashed a picture as Noah wandered over, looking awkward and completely out of her element in her gothic attire, standing next to us in the brightly lit Burger King. Damon swooped her closer, his arm sliding over her shoulders, as he plopped the crown down on top of her top hat. I grinned widely and took another picture.

"Cheer up, Gothy!" Damon purred as her cheeks flooded with pink. My phone jingled and I brightened excitedly. Jeremy!

I opened the picture text and was immediately in love with the picture staring back at me. It was just so _perfect_ in its simplistic design that it spoke in volumes to me. I doubted my grin could become any wider and I texted my unending devotion and praise to Jeremy's perfect hummingbird. That kid needed to start drawing again ASAP!

"I got the hummingbird," I said happily, presenting my phone to Noah and Damon with a gleeful bounce. "We can commence with tattooing after I stuff my face with a burger!"

Things were going blissfully well, Noah was opening up more and becoming more friendly. She even shared my fries. Which was good. Girl needed more food in her. I was a bundle of bouncing excitement as we threw the trash away (I decided to refill my drink so I had sugar on the way to the tattoo shop), when Noah and a bulky looking guy nearly collided as we were leaving. It was my fault, really, I threw the door open and shoved her from the building.

"Watch where the fuck you're going you freak!"

Noah stared at him impassively, seemingly unfazed by his waspish words, but I sure as _hell _wasn't going to let that go. Noah might never get to know the real me, or become anything more than a sort of friend (with lots of compelling to ignore all the bad stuff about us) but she was with _me_.

And _nobody _insults the people I fuck with.

Damon's arm curled around my waist, hauling me back before I could even lunge at the guy so I settled with throwing my drink at him. Which hit the ground in front of him. He sprang backwards and sneered.

"You're a bunch of fucking dykes!"

"Hell fucking yeah we are, you dickweed!" I agreed loudly. "You gotta problem with shit that's none of your business?"

"Clare," Noah said softly, gliding to my side, her hand on my arm. "It's fine. Drop it. It's because I'm dressed differently. It happens. People are _idiots_ and he is not worth your anger." This chick needed a higher self-esteem, this was _not _okay! And he was _not _getting away with it!

"Fucking yeah I have a fucking problem with you little shits! You're obnoxious and out of fuckin' control! You should apologize for throwing a _drink _at me! Un-fuckin'-called for!"

I laughed mockingly at him. "I'll destroy you." This _little _petty man, he thinks he can just insult _me _and get away with it? Didn't he _know _who he was attempting to demean?

"Yeah? With what? You hidin' a vibrator you'll hit me with in your purse? Or you gonna have the shmuck behind you do all your work for you?"

"Apologize. And _walk away_," Damon advised in an annoyingly pleasant voice. I didn't _want _him compelled away! I wanted to smack him across the face! I wanted to _ruin _him completely, financially!

"I'm sorry," the man said suddenly, looking ashamed. A vicious satisfaction swept through me. And suddenly I didn't care that he'd been compelled to say it. "I didn't mean any disrespect."

"You shouldn't have, Damon." Noah said quietly, anger clipped at her tones as she turned to fix Damon with a look. "You can't control people like that, he's got the right to think and feel _however _he wants. Just because you don't _agree_—"

"He has the right to think and feel however he wants, but that doesn't mean he has the _right _to be hurtful!" I exploded, frowning at Noah in shock. "What the hell is wrong with you? You're going to stand there and let him talk down to you? _He's _dressed differently and do you feel the need to try to take him down a few pegs? To humiliate him? To make a comment about his sexuality without knowing it and then degrading him for it? You need to stop being meek! You are _Noah_, and nobody is allowed to talk down to you! You are not _less _than him because of what you are or who you are! You are entitled! You are equal to his stupid ass, never forget that! You are _important_!" My attention flickered over toward my Burger King cup. Oh God! "And now my drink is gone." I felt a pout coming on.

Look at all that sugary liquid.

Wasted.

All over the street.

Which should've been in my mouth.

Damon's arms slid away from me and I bounced away from them, to grieve my dead drink. I crouched down next to the cup, the top broken open, soda trickling down the sidewalk. It was like a scene out of a horror movie.

You know, if my soda was a person.

"What you said… it's very kind…" Noah began softly and I blinked at her, frowning. "And nobody has ever said anything like that to me, or stuck up for me…"

"She's over it now." Damon said indifferently. "There's no point in trying to revive the conversation."

"Ugh, are we still talking about that guy? That happened like three days ago." I frowned. Can we focus on the fact that I don't have a drink now? This was seriously upsetting. I needed the extra boost of caffeine for when I text Elena a picture of me getting a tattoo. 'Cause she, for sure, was going to rip all the energy from me.

Like a _vampire_.

"Either way," Noah continued, her gaze fixed on Damon. "As much as I appreciate it, don't compel someone on my behalf again."

"_You _do not tell me what I can and cannot do." Damon murmured darkly, taking a threatening step closer to the gothic girl. "That wasn't for _you_. I wasn't holding onto Clarissa because I felt a surge of affectionate. She's stupidly protective and she comes from a place where she's not used to people speaking down to her or the people she associates with. She wouldn't have stopped until he apologized and was out of her face. Would you rather I have just killed him?"

_Boring_.

I pulled out my phone, texting Stefan a vague: _ im so upset i cant stop crying_. Followed by: _there was a man and things got really hectic and im really confused and it just happened all so fast. Its everywhere. All over the street._

I then turned my phone off, grinning.

No less than thirty seconds later, Damon's phone burst into angry shrills and I immediately burst into giggles. Bouncing to my feet, I grabbed Noah's hand and skipped down the sidewalk, away from Damon.

"Why are we running?" Noah asked as I ducked into a mini-grocery store.

I grinned mischievously. "Because I texted Damon's overly worried brother and totally implied someone died. I mean, I was talking about my drink, but he doesn't know that." I smothered a giggle, plucking up a gray shopping basket. "And then I turned my phone off!"

A small little smile slipped across Noah's pretty face. "I've never met anybody like you before, Clare."

_Clarissia +1, 7 billion people 0_. Hell. Freakin'. Yeah.

"How can you be so… wild? So uncaring?" She asked as I threw random fruit into the basket. "You say and do whatever you want."

"Because all that matters is being happy." I smiled at her. "Happiness is worth so much more than all the money and respect and status in the world. Nobody can take this from me."

I spent forever doing whatever everybody else wanted me to do, being who they wanted me to be, saying whatever they wanted me to say. Now I do and say everything _I _wanna. Especially now that I was _here_.

"Whaaat did you tell Stefan?" I heard Damon's darkly amused drawl before he came sauntering around the stand of bananas.

"He's found us!" I thrust the basket into Noah's arms. "Judge Claude Frollo! A trap had been laid for the gypsies and they gazed up in fear and alarm! At a figure whose clutches were iron as much as the bells!"

"What? Why do I have to be Frollo?" Damon frowned. "He wasn't a judge. He was an Archdeacon…" I brightened.

"Oh God, I have to get you to see the Disney version of the Hunchback of Notre Dame. I saw it last year, and I'm pretty sure I had somehow took acid. It's so different from the book—"

Damon rolled his eyes and shoved me. I shrieked, flailing backwards. "Tag, you're it!"

"DAMN IT, D!" I snapped, rubbing my throbbing elbow angrily but both he and Noah were gone. He stole my lady! I picked my bruised body off the floor and went searching.

About five steps was all it took for me to feel frustrated. How was I supposed to find them?

I pulled my phone out, turning it back on. I had ten unread text messages and two voicemails. HA! I dialed in Damon's number.

"CHEATER!" I heard Damon shout somewhere as loud ringing went off, and then instantly went silent. Maybe I should have called him with a blocked number so he didn't know it was me.

"Give me hints." I demanded quietly, fairly certain he'd be able to hear me regardless. I rounded a corner, peaking into the cereal aisle to find that they weren't there.

My phone jingled.

Damon: _getting warmer_

Which was quickly followed by another text by an unknown number: _he lies. You're getting colder_.

Noah!

I glanced around, looking for the large dome like mirrors that usually clung to corners of the walls—that was the only way they'd be able to see me. Unless they were both lying and throwing out random hints! _Jerks_!

I gave it another two minutes of half assed searching until I decided I'd go over to the refrigerated section and get myself a drink. As I made my way over, a thought crossed my mind, and I grinned, calling Noah.

"_Oh, the horror of our love, never so much blood pulled through my veins_," I heard a dark voice cooing, sounding slightly muffled, followed by a shriek of surprise.

"What the hell?" I heard Damon growl. "Turn it off!"

"_I'm a killer, cold and wrathful_!" I followed the ringtone and the sound of Noah digging through her purse. Those fuckers were by the soda! "_Silent sleeper, I've been inside your bedroom, I've murdered half the town, left you love notes on their headstones! I'll fill the graveyards until I have you!_"

"FOUND YOU!" I shouted, causing Noah to spring backwards in surprise as I slammed my phone shut, pocketing and grinning at them. "I win!"

"You cheated, you win nothing!" Damon said, dangling a Pepsi in front of my face. "I _was _going to give this to you…"

I swiped it from his hand, opening it before he could take it back from me. The bottle hissed angrily and I screeched as the liquid came out quickly, spraying everywhere. "You bitch!" I threw the bottle at Damon and he easily swatted it from him, causing the bottle to soar through the air, spraying and hissing, going everywhere.

Noah burst into quiet giggles, covering her mouth. I threw her a betrayed look and she blushed. "I'm—I'm sorry! I don't mean to laugh!"

"I'm sticky!" I cried, flapping my wet sleeves. This meant war! I marched over to the drinks.

And so five minutes later, and a lot of open soda bottles spewed all over the floor, we left right after being kicked out. Noah and I were the only ones to receive damage, as Damon was a cheating bastard who could easily dodge everything I threw or sprayed at him. Loser.

"I never said you killed anyone." I said after reading the texts I sent to Stefan back to Damon. "I just heavily implied horrible things occurred. Which, if you guys remember, my soda spilled."

"It didn't spill, Clare, you threw it." Noah corrected softly but what did she know? Lies, that's what. I knew the friggin' truth.

"It's true," Damon agreed gravely, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Clary… You killed your own drink."

I gasped. "No!"

"Yes! You have to face reality! It was you! You're the reason the Coke lays dead on the sidewalk. I heard the betrayed _why _as it hit the pavement!" Damon shook my shoulders. "You've murdered!"

"The horror of our love!" I cried, with mock anguish.

* * *

Noah Jones, at nineteen years old, died September 25th, 2009. Well. _Metaphorically_, speaking. She had always considered herself a misunderstood and tragic individual born to a welcoming and warm family that tended to be like a boring episode of 7th Heaven. Her mother's clothing and hair styles seemed to be stuck in the 80s, and her father was a school principal. She had a younger sister, fourteen, who was going through a preppy phase and seemed to hate everybody regardless of what they said or did. Noah had discovered the world of dark clothing when she turned thirteen, and her family adjusted to it. She got a whole new set of all gothic friends, who seemed to understand her seemingly well enough at first.

Sometimes they could be overly negative about life and the people in it, but Noah merely nodded her head and went along with it.

At fifteen, when she brought home a boy with piercings and dyed hair, her father had frowned tightly but didn't say anything.

At sixteen, when she brought home a girl with piercings and dyed hair, her mother frowned tightly but didn't say anything.

Noah wasn't sure where she fit in when it came to who she was, exactly. She knew she liked the gothic style, she felt beautiful wearing frilly skirts and studded boots. But she couldn't connect, or relate, to her friends. She didn't even know what she _was_, sexuality wise. She thought bisexual. Or was it pansexual? Demisexual? Maybe it was omnisexual… There were so many _sexuals_ these days. And Noah supposed she was just like every other teenager in the world, feeling the need to _find _themselves.

A few months shy of her eighteenth birthday, she started dating a girl that just _got _her. Noah knew it wasn't _love_, but nobody had ever understood her or made her feel comfortable with herself like Daisy. Daisy introduced her to _The Red Spider_, and Noah knew she found herself and who she was. Even when her and Daisy decided to just be friends, Noah was happier than she ever was. She kept who she was, her lifestyle, from her other friends and family. They didn't need to know.

She didn't believe in love at first sight, she didn't think anybody these days did. And she certainly wasn't going to agree to that being what this was. If anything, the moment she glimpsed Clare, she was _doomed_. Clare had flounced into _The Red Spider _as though she owned the place and everybody in it, but Noah had found that was simply how Clare was no matter where she was or who she was with. Then there was _Damon_, who Noah had mistook for Clare's shadow—metaphorically speaking, of course. He was dark, impossibly, sinfully, beautiful, and crept alongside Clare who was the brightest thing Noah had ever seen. She watched them chat up the bartender for a while and it was like becoming _possessed_. She _had _to know who Clare was. All she could find out was that Clare and her dark _supposed _vampire were 'passing through'.

Noah realized how wrong she was about Damon's place in Clare's life when they spun and danced around in the center of the bar, as if it were only they in _The Red Spider_. Noah had never been a jealous person, and even now, she wouldn't be able to say what it was that had her sweeping toward the two. She had to be seen, she _needed _to be seen. This _urgency _was the start of Noah's downfall. Never in a million years did Noah think successfully drawing Clare's attention to her existence would mean hanging out with her, or, even more so, coming to find that vampires—and not the kind she thought she was—were _real_.

The world revolved around Clare and Damon, spun at the tips of their fingers, and the beautiful pair _knew _it. Noah didn't know how anyone could go into a store and make as big of a mess as they did, completely disregarding the employee's distress and skip out as though none of it mattered. Noah had spilt a drink once, and she had apologized profusely while offering to clean up her mess. These two, wildly beautiful and captivating, were children. _Dangerous _children. They lived in their own world, untouchable, arrogant and Noah was swept up with them.

She could not bring herself to try to leave Clare's side. There was something about Clare that _made _Noah feel desperate for her approval, even if it meant awkwardly hovering next to her. It was sad. And it was pathetic. Noah had sworn since finding who she was, and _The Red Spider_,that she wouldn't let herself be like that. And she _shouldn't_, not for someone like Clare.

Clare was entitled, Noah could see it very clearly, she walked as though she owned everything, as though everything was hers for the taking if she wanted it. Clare was the kind of person who must've never heard the word 'no' before, it simply didn't _exist _for her. And Noah almost hated herself for easily proving her right. Clare wanted Noah (_for Damon_) and here she was, unable to refuse her. Clare would never know the pain of not fitting in, or being looked at with scorn, Clare would never know any type of hardship that came with life.

It was probably why Clare didn't _see_ _people_, didn't comprehend that they had _lives_, that destroying an entire inventory of drinks would cost the small family-owned market _money_, and time, that she inconvenienced everyone around her. She didn't comprehend the negative, long lasting, effect compelling someone to use their _credit card _would have. She didn't care that everyone had a right to their own feelings, even if those feelings were spoken out loud in a cruel manner. She didn't realize that _controlling _their mind was a terrifying invasion of privacy.

Clare was inconsiderate. Nothing but her own happiness mattered. Noah didn't understand how anyone could be so shallow. There was more to life than just _happiness_. Other feelings mattered too, made life a wide range of different kinds of beautiful. Even the dark, grim, times had purpose.

Noah couldn't imagine what her family must be going through at that moment, the _worry _and anxiety she was putting them through. How could she not realize? Did she just not _care_? Getting a tattoo was probably the most impulsive thing Noah had ever heard of, especially since she apparently made the decision a few hours previously. Noah really wasn't exactly clear as to why she was getting one, but both her and Damon were darkly amused by the prospect of it. From what Noah gathered, Damon's brother and Clare's sister would have heart attacks if Clare returned with one. Which left Noah wondering if Clare was only doing it for the drama.

Clare's drive for creating mischief and drama was what made her _cruel_. Clare and Damon appeared to _delight _in it. The pair seemed to grow bored fairly quickly, and the more bored they appeared to be, the worse their cruel mischief became. It was even directed at each other. Damon seemed to have no qualms with shoving Clare to the ground, yanking on her hair—Noah had been horrified to learn that Damon had apparently even _killed _her before. She wasn't sure how that was possible, but she didn't doubt it was true. How could Clare be so _okay _with this? To laugh when he threw her to the ground, or had her smack herself across the face? Didn't Clare realize how damaging all this was? That she was in a twisted, abusive, friendship? What happened when Clare lost her amusement to Damon? Her family must've been sick with worry. Especially Damon's brother, who _knew _what Damon was. And then to start petty drama and turn her phone off, leaving that poor guy to be frantic with a thousand different scenarios that could have happened?

Noah wasn't even the _third wheel_, she was the snack inside a pocket. And just when Noah believes she'll be able to say she's done, she has to go home, Clare's eyes are on her and nothing else exists. For while Clare has all her dark faults, she's warm and bright and Noah would follow her _anywhere_.

Clare had a fierce loyalty that Noah had never seen before, they hadn't known each other for very long when Clare defended her loudly, even attempting to fight a man just because he called Noah a _freak_. With Clare, it's like being enveloped in a warmth of protection. She believed, honestly believed, no harm would come to her. Even if Damon decided he wanted to drain her of blood, Noah believed Clare would keep him from doing so.

In all nineteen years of Noah's life, she had never had as much fun (or laughed as much) as when she was in Clare's company. Noah admired her endless self-esteem, she feared no rejection and was so charismatic that Noah found herself coming out of shell. She saw worth in Noah that Noah, herself, had not seen, but was starting to. She wanted to be like Clare, in that aspect. Clare had a breathtaking ability to make Noah feel like she were the only person that existed, as though it were just them. Like _nobody _else mattered, and what Noah had to say was the most important thing Clare could ever hear. There were no rules, the world was their _playground_, and Clare taking Noah's hand, running off with her had been… Amazing.

She wanted to live in Clare's world.

Clare was sweet and kind, with playful smiles and eyes that promised a world of happiness and secrets. She had the best kind of laugh, too, full of life and uncontrollable, like she'd never heard anything so hilarious before and couldn't contain herself. Noah wanted to know who the mysterious _Jay_ was (Or J, as Clare seemed to have a fondness for shorting names). Once Jay/J texted her, Clare was a million miles away, and she brimmed with such a sweet affection for the guy (or girl) that Noah couldn't find it in herself to be jealous. She had a feeling that it might've been a family member.

So when she had an out, when they were headed to Brooklyn to go to a tattoo shop 'Liv (the bartender) recommended, Noah found herself getting in the taxi with them anyway. Noah had a new goal. She had to befriend Clare, become as close as she could. She had to _save _Clare from Damon, who was the worst thing that could have possibly happened to her. There was a light in Clare, a glow, and she would be _damned _if she let Damon take that away, turn her into something dark and unreachable.

* * *

"So how does that work?" I wondered, eyeing Damon. I was in between him and Noah, in the back of a cruddy cab, headed to Brooklyn.

"How does what work?" Damon's gaze flickered in my direction, his voice bored. "We've been sitting in silence for five minutes, I'm not a mind reader."

"The tattoo thing." Seriously, Damon, get with the program, what else would I be talking about? I knew he was about to open his mouth and shoot something sarcastic at me. "I mean _you _getting a tattoo. How does that work? Since your magical vampire blood can heal so fast, how can you get one?"

"Kryptonite tipped tattoo machine." Noah deadpanned quietly next to me and I burst into giggles.

"It's not like in _The Vampire Lestat_, where Gabrielle would cut her hair and it would grow back, I'm not _frozen _in time. And while I heal fast, the ink is still under the skin. I can't erase the ink with my _magical vampire blood_." Damon shifted a shoulder upward. "It does take a little bit longer to get tattooed, though."

* * *

The tattoo parlor was a neat little place called _Ragtag Tats_ which was tucked away from other buildings, creating a calming sense of privacy. The door even had one of those bells at the top which rang cheerfully, drawing the attention of two lanky individuals who bore resemblance to Olivia in a way that I couldn't place my finger on. Like they weren't related, but they clearly belonged together.

The girl, who couldn't be older than twenty-five, was sitting up on a glass counter, covered in pretty tattoos from her neck down to her waist (she was wearing pants, so I had no idea if the tattoos continued on). She had black and pink hair up in a side ponytail, and the same smoky eyes that Olivia had. The lanky guy looked closer to his thirties and was a little darker than Olivia with the same buzz cut. His eyes were a light green and friendly as he stood up, patting down his black jeans.

"Hey, you Clare?" He was across the room in three long strides, offering a hand that I took warmly. I grinned. Yonkers accent. Loved it.

"Yeah, and this is Damon and Noah." I introduced happily.

"I'm Jeb, that's Sammy," he nodded toward the girl who gave a wave. "Olivia says she sent me a virgin, and I'm pretty pumped." He paused, bright green eyes flicking toward Damon who scoffed, pulling me closer to him. "Calm down, Fangs, I'm talking about her being a _tattoo _virgin." Jeb's tone was playful.

"_Fangs_?" Damon repeated, as if offended, but really, he should've known that they'd be in on this. Olivia _worked _at a pretend vampire bar.

"Olivia said you were interested in getting a hummingbird tat?" Sammy slid down from the counter, pulling out a black binder. "I've sketched up a few different designs for you."

"Oh!" That was really nice and I grinned warmly at her, pulling out my cellphone. "Um, actually… I had my brother design something for me, but thank you!" Sammy took my phone from me, a small smile on her face.

"Keeping it in the family, I like it." Jeb, peering over Sammy's shoulder to look at it. "Your brother has some talent, too."

"Thank you." I murmured, feeling a swell of pride grow for Jeremy. Maybe he should be a tattoo artist. I could totally see Jeremy diggin' it.

"I'll get this printed out," Sammy said and I nodded as she walked off to another side of the parlor.

"I'm not going to ask how old you are." Jeb said with his laid back friendliness. "Olivia sold me on your story, we've all got that here. And I'm doing this as a huge favor to her, she, me and Sammy are kind of like a pack and I've known her since before her transition." An amused grin twitched across his face. "Since you're golden to her, you're golden to _me_."

"She's a werewolf?" Noah blurted out, whipping my attention back to her. She flushed.

"Is that what they call it these days?" Damon wondered sarcastically and I shot him a look that had him raising his eyebrows.

Noah was chewing on her lower lip, looking horrifically embarrassed and it was just adorable. "I apologize, I didn't mean to say that… You said pack and transition and I'm—it's been a weird day for me…"

"She was a man." Damon said dismissively. "Now she's not. That's her transition. There is no such thing as _werewolves_."

"Damon!" I snapped, a flare of protectiveness rising in my chest and he merely stared back at me. "She was always a woman! Doesn't matter what body parts she had on her, she was always Olivia. And don't _out _her, it's not for us to tell Noah that."

"Are you cranky, Clary?" He cooed, grinning teasingly at me. I huffed, causing his grin to grow as he tugged me closer to him. I wanted to stay annoyed, I really did, but with Damon tucking me into his side, his warmth rolling over me in a calming way, my irritation fell away and I leaned into him. _Lame_.

"My fault," Jeb laughed. "I didn't realize Noah didn't know about Olivia. It's alright, you seem like a cool chick, Noah, Olivia will be cool with it." He winked and the gothic girl next to me blushed. Jeb's friendly green eyes turned back to me. "So, you the only one to get a tattoo? I've got all night."

I tilted my head up to Damon curiously, lacing my fingers with his. "You gonna get a tattoo with me, D?"

"Put my name on you and I'll get whatever you want." Damon promised but I'm pretty sure he was lying. He'd wait until I was branded to be like '_HAHA KIDDING_'.

"Fine, don't be impulsive with me." Shitbag. I turned toward Noah and she smiled apologetically. Aw. I grinned at Jeb. "Guess I'm lone wolfing it."

Sammy had Jeremy's hummingbird printed out and then sketched onto this sort of paper that I guess would transfer the drawing. After a few minutes of debating, Noah suggested having it on my wrist so that my pulse could act like the flutter of its wings.

"Noah, that's genius!" I gushed happily, causing her face to explode into a bright shade of crimson and she stammered some incoherent before just falling silent. That girl really needed to learn how to take a compliment.

"Anything I need to know about you, medically, before we start?" Jeb asked as he began to set up the tattooing equipment, Sammy applying the sketch to my left wrist.

"Um." I thought back to what Damon said, how it took a little longer for him to get a tattoo. I didn't heal nearly as quick as when I had his blood, but I still healed pretty fast. "I… Like, this is gonna sound super weird, but I kind of heal fast."

Jeb looked up, raising his eyebrows slowly and I offered a shrug. "That's preferable to something, like, being anemic, or anything that could cause… severe health risks." I merely grinned.

I really, _really _thought this was gonna hurt a hell of a lot more than it did. But I guess after waking up to a broken neck a few friggin' times, this shit was dulled. I mean, it still _hurt_, and I really wanted this to be over with, but it wasn't anything I couldn't handle. I think the worst of it was having to sit still. Damon and Noah sat to my right, Noah and Sammy actually seemed to have hit it off while Damon kept his gaze pinned to me.

Like he was waiting for me to burst into tears.

Jerk.

"You're taking this pretty well," Sammy said after laughing to whatever Noah had just told her. Her smoky eyes slid over to me. "Olivia said you had a high pain tolerance, but we've had burly men wince and you're a virgin." Gah.

"I kind of broke some painful bones." I offered, not sure what else to say. "This is kind of… you know, nothing compared to that." Sammy's gaze became almost _knowing _and she glanced at Jeb, while Noah chewed on her lip, looking worried.

Dramatic.

"Fuck it," Damon sighed, leaning back. "I'm getting a tattoo too. We can _both_ have hummingbirds."

I gaped at him, my heart choking in my chest. "You want to get _matching _tattoos?" I wasn't sure I could believe it. This was just—was he _serious_? "Look, I'm all for crazy impulsive, but that's… I mean, Damon, tattoos are—"

"Forever." He agreed flatly, his gaze holding mine and I nearly recoiled from the intensity of his blue eyes. "Yes. I'm _aware_, Clary. You're the one who said _everything _is forever, and you're right. You've already left your damn mark, it'll never go away, so at least I can carry around a visible reminder. It'll work both ways… When I leave, the hummingbird will make you think of _me_… And I want you to remember the good, not the bad."

"When you leave?" I echoed, trying to wrap my mind around what the hell he was _saying_. Remember the good and not the bad? _It'll never go away_. Damon only offered a tiny smile, gently taking my hand and planting a soft kiss on my palm. My skin tingled, and my mind went blank. "Damon?"

"Relax, birdhouse." He murmured, his grin growing into a teasing, self-assured, smirk. The whole world was spinning. _Birdhouse_.

I was only half aware that Sammy was gathering some things and leading Damon into another section. _Birdhouse_.

"You guys usually that intense?" Jeb wondered, curiously. I realized he'd stopped tattooing and I turned to look at him. _Birdhouse_.

"I don't know." I couldn't _think_. Jeb went back to tattooing, the machine buzzing loudly. I was Damon's _birdhouse_...?

* * *

We stayed for maybe an hour after getting the tattoos (Damon got his right under the Latin), just hanging out and talking to Sammy and Jeb, both of who were fun. Damon and Jeb seemed to actually get along, their sense of humor pretty similar. Which was fantastic, bastard needed more friends. Noah and Sammy exchanged numbers, pictures were taken, and Jeb let us know to hit them up the next time we were in the city, that they knew this chill club. Sweet, more friends. I was flattered beyond belief for Jeremy when Jeb asked if they could keep his design.

It was like 2AM by the time we got back to the hotel, with Noah, who apparently either didn't have a curfew or gave none of the fucks at this point. If Damon was skirting around getting out of talking about his whole _you're a mark on my soul _tidbit and the whole _remember the good when I'm gone _angst crap, I had no problem with it as he was shoving sugar down my throat. Milkshake from McDonalds? Hell _yeah_.

"Clare!" Noah whispered with a giggle as I twirled her around the hallway, her bag knocking over a plant. "Stop! You might wake someone!"

"What people?" I asked happily. "There is only _us_!"

"This is a very nice hotel!" Noah continued, swaying as I let go of her. "I don't want to ruin it…"

Pfft!

"Nooo, we got a regular room, it's seriously on the cheap side, I swear!" I assured her pleasantly and she opened her mouth. "Shh, don't speak. Think of the children!"

Damon threw the door open to our room, swooped Noah up by the waist and flung her inside. I heard her shriek as she hit the bed. He then turned around, leaning against the doorframe lazily. I raised my eyebrows as he blocked my entrance.

"I'll let you know when I'm _done_," he said tapping my nose playfully. "Give us like… a half hour. Maybe _more_."

Wait.

_What_?

He smirked at me. "Clary, I have _needs_. Needs in which you refuse to _help me _with." I stared at him, not _understanding_. "Stay out of trouble, I'll text you when its safe for you to come back."

He pushed me back a little and slammed the door.

In.

My.

Face.

Damon _slammed _the door. In my _face_.

Was

he

FUCKING

_KIDDING_

_ME?!_

My mouth fell open in a fit of outraged anger. Damon was _kicking _me out of the hotel room so he could get fucking _laid_? I wasn't his _fucking _bro, I was _not _cool with this! That fucking asshole. This was the biggest dick move. Ever.

For a single, furious, moment I regretted having Noah join us tonight, I almost _hated _her. But the surge of irritation passed quickly. It wasn't her fault, and it had been _my _idea. She had no chance, really, it was _Damon_, and he was sexy as fuck. And to be fair, since she did serve as a walking snack, she deserved to get some Damon booty as payment.

_Tits_.

I turned around and sulked down the hallway, trying to get rid of the weird tightness in my chest. Why did this _bother _me so much? Like, yeah, sure, it was rude as _fuck_. And I guess I was feeling a little left out—not that I really wanted to engage in a threesome or anything, just that they were doing shit _without _me. This was so _Damon _though, and something I guess I needed to get over and get used to. Ugh, the fact that I was actually feeling kind of hurt was stupid.

And an ugly reminder that I could not, for a single moment, let myself get swept away by this damned sexual tension between us. I wasn't a friends-with-benefits kind of person, not even for Damon. It wasn't even about true love or anything like that either. I just knew if I ever wanted to do something, even if it was just kissing, it'd have to be a totally exclusive thing. And that wasn't Damon's way, nor would I change that about him. This just kind of sucked.

There was only one thing to do. Sing and bounce around the halls aimlessly, and _not _think about Damon and Noah getting it on.

"…I was killin' before killin' was coooool," I sang, swinging my hips to the imaginary beat as I danced down the abandoned hallway. "You're so cool! You're so cool! So coooool! 'Caaaaaause we aaaaaaaall waaanna party when the funeral ends!" I bounced down the hall. "Ba-ba-ba, ba-ba-ba! And we aaaaaall get together when we bury our friends! Ba-ba-ba, ba—" I rounded a corner and nearly crashed into someone's chest. I hastily sprang backwards, tripping on my own pants and slamming into the ground pretty hard.

This was my life. I'm always landing hard on my ass.

"I apologize, I had not meant to cause you to lose your footing." A familiar cultured voice susurrated calmly, drawing my attention upward. Suits, the guy I'd mistook for Michael, was looming over me, his face schooled into an appropriate amount of apologetic concern. "Are you alright?"

As he offered a hand, the hotel's soft lighting bounced off onyx cuff links and an incredibly expensive watch—a _Patek Philippe_ which I knew for certain was a little bit above the average stuffy rich man's expenditures. As I took his (very well-manicured) hand, I stole a quick glance at his light gray three piece suit. _Kiton_?

This impeccably dressed stranger oozed with dangerously wealthy and powerful, his sharp, intelligent, eyes boring straight into mine, giving nothing away. His lips were slanted into a tiny smile that should have been friendly, but I took as intimidating, like I was a tiny bug scurrying around his feet. Everything about him screamed for me to behave, to assure him I was an Everett and _how dare _he belittle me with such a smile. But I wasn't an Everett, and my mother would simply die if she knew what I was planning.

_Hello _distraction.

"Suits!" I exclaimed, cheerfully, highly amused with myself as I threw my arms around the terrifyingly calm man, embracing him as though we were old friends. "My God, it's been _five-ever_." I pulled back before he could even move, smiling at him happily. "Thank _God _you are here, I was going to die of boredom! My friend, Damon—you remember the guy I was with before, yes? No? If you were too busy being stunned by my angelic appearance to notice anyone else, I completely understand. Anyway, he's getting his freak on with a girl we just met, hopefully _not_ _on the bed_," I hoped Damon could hear me. Asshole. "Sadly they cannot have me join in on their fun, as my virtues can _never _be compromised." Suck it, Damon. I am untouchable!

"Your sense of control is admirable." Was all he said, his tone suggesting calm friendliness, as though what I had to say was important and he had _all _the time in the world to listen to me ramble.

Old money gentlemanly values, gotta freakin' love 'em. I was going to make him regret ever coming into contact with me. More so, because this is everything I've _ever _wanted to do with the people who I was forced to associate with. Was it fair that I was going to take this out on Suits? Of course not. Did I care? _Nope_.

I smiled playfully. "Everything about me is admirable. But enough about my tragic life, what are _you _doing here?" Seriously, someone like _Suits _would have one of the better off rooms—like the ones with their own private elevators, away from the poverty stricken rooms over here.

"Here in New York? I've returned to the States… For business, means." Suits' brown eyes swept carefully across my face. "Where are you from, if you don't mind the prying? I must confess that I have no desire to return to my room. I am still adjusting to the time zones and I'm hardly tired."

"Well," I murmured, my lips curving into a secretive grin. "I'm not from _here_. Why don't you join me in the lounge? We can be not bored _together_." And you can buy me excessive amounts of soda. And I won't think about Damon and Noah because I can totally have fun without them. "I'm Clarissa."

He tilted his head toward the direction of the elevator. "Elijah."

* * *

A million cookies for Sunblaze99 and Lucilla Tinwetari who totally called Suits being Elijah! You guys rock!

And a big thank you to: Chaos-and-Insanity, Sakae Doragon, Shannyrox101, AshlynVarela, Elizabeth Kimball, Guest, XxBriannaxX, SomebodyWhoCares, janessa, Lissa for the tattoo inputs! I completely fell in love with the matching hummingbird idea/having something on them that will remind each other of the other forever. Later on, when Darissa is an actual thing, they'll totally go back and add something Minnie Mouse and Mickey Mouse related! Thanks! I'm also digging the temp. tattoo idea, just to freak out Elena and Stefan! You guys are geniuses.

I hope I made the whole thing with vampires able to get tattoos realistic for ya, CallistoAngel.

Again, big thank you to everyone who sends in ideas! Like pretend engagement rings and stuff, you guys are awesome and give me great ideas! Thank you!

So in the running: Anna/Jeremy, Jeremy/Kol, and Jeremy/Bonnie. At least we're all agreed nobody wants him with Vicki!

I also hope you guys didn't mind Noah's short POV. I thought it might be kind of interesting to show how someone views them.

**Q: Clarissa/Elijah friendship?**  
I LOVE Elijah, he's my second favorite. But I'm not sure how he and Clarissa are going to mix in the long run. I've got some stuff planned out for next chapter and all I can say it's not gonna be good for Clarissa, she's going to find herself in a bit of trouble. I can see Elijah 'putting up' with her, like a much older brother who just wants to die and babysitting a hyper active 5 year old. But maybe she'll win him over!

**Q: Clarissa/Katherine** **friendship/Enemies?**  
If Damon was never in the mix, I personally think Clarissa and Katherine would be very good friends. In the kind of way where neither are emotionally attached to the other and use each other for self-serving reasons. I'm really not sure how it'll go, we'll just see where Clarissa takes it. I can see them getting into some mischief once Damon is less butthurt and pissed to hell. He might join them. I hate to say it, but I really believe no matter what Damon will always hold a soft spot for Katherine. He loved her, and nothing can take that away. And Damon is pretty loyal to the people he cares about even if he tries to pretend he isn't.

**Q: Clarissa's personality/behavior. **  
I have TONED DOWN the extreme batshit craziness that is the real Clarissa, by a lot, because my roommie is like a cat spazzing out on catnip 24/7. Which surprisingly, she isn't tiring to be around. It's after hanging out with her that you just wanna smash your face through a wall and sleep. A lot of you can identify with her, which is great, and makes me happy, and some of you don't see how she's possible. Clarissa is complex. She self-exiled herself from her family (they still pay for almost everything), she's still a bit of a rich girl trying not to be a rich girl. And she acts childishly because she never really had the chance to. In a sense, she's like those sheltered homeschooled kids from strict religious families going to college and just going batshit with partying.

**Q: Clarissa!Vampire?**  
Yes. After Damon realizes Katherine is alive and well, he's just going to lunge at Clarissa, bite himself, make her drink his blood and snap her neck while sobbing "BFF MEANS FOREVEEEEERRRR". No, I'm kidding, but that'll be his train of thought. Clarissa WILL become a vampire at some point in this fic, and nobody is going to be prepared for her. Everything is heightened, so it'll be like she's sugar high. Forever.

**Q: Too much/Not Enough in chapters.**  
guys, nO. On average I do 11,000-14,000 words per chapter. This jerk is like 19,000. I know that, in the series, I haven't gotten very far. It's like episode 4. And I know you guys want the originals (they come in around season 3?) I can throw the originals into the fic a lot sooner than that and the bonding/adventures is kind of the whole point to this fanfic. I'd honestly get bored just following the episodes, I've got a LOT of shit planned for all the timeskips and holidays. I know some things are unnecessary, like the little scene with Clarissa getting sick and puking. Plus a lot of stuff that happened in the episodes aren't going to happen. Clarissa has pretty much alerted things. I could lay off some of the adventures and stick to episodes for a few chapters, if you guys really want.

**Q: Elena knowing about vampires?**  
Their trip to the city is right after Family Ties (the founders party) the weekend before You're Undead To Me. So instead of rotting away, Damon is out doing vampire dickery in the city. Elena "figures out" Stefan's secret after the whole car wash thing. So we can either a) have that go according to plan with her asking Clarissa to play detective with her or b) We can have Damon and Clarissa spoil the secret OR c) Stefan comes clean to her on his own and Clarissa gets a horrible surprise when she gets home and Elena is like "OMG VAMPirE he KILLED pPL!"

**Q: Will Damon be angry at Clarissa when it's revealed Katherine is still alive?**  
We all know how Damon gets when he's hurt and angry. I have something planned out for that, actually. You guys will just have to see!

**Q: Damon continuously killing Clarissa, what if she has limited lives?**  
This has not crossed either one of their minds. It should, because that's the first thing I'd think if I came back to life. And the fact that they don't know HOW or WHY Clarissa can come back to life is kind of dangerous. They're idiots.

Woo, thanks for the questions guys. I love your inputs and I love hearing about what kind of day you're having! If you guys are curious about the hummingbird tattoo, I have a link up in my profile. THANKS FOR READING!


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer:** I own Vampire Diaries and Clarissa is now canon. kidding. Imagine though? I don't own anything!

A super mega, mega, thank you to my fantastic reviewers!: Moka-girl, princessabbie10, vikki. dillard, XxBriannaxX, Sunblaze99, ADORATIO, MrsMusicAddict, FalconHQ, Guest, Chaos-and-Insanity, Jasmine, RealHuntress18 (Clajah, I LOVE IT!), mkittycat1, flazzy cullen, MelissaIsLame (I haven't watched Supernatural yet, everyone insists I should though :P), DGfleetfox, SomebodyWhoCares, Shannyrox101, Apatu, Vampire I No Drama, madison. g. johnson, Alex Kavanagh, Randomreader1320, Britt, CallistoAngel, nessafly1, JackieOh, Mei77, Lucilla Tinwetari, szubitasz, eloisa, 1llu510n (hope you did well on your exam!), Courtney (glad to hear it! :D), iheartanime07, Guest (2), CacklingBlasphemy. Seriously guys, you really keep me motivated!

Just so everyone is clear, Noah is attracted to both genders, and Damon being Damon, she's (unhappily) attracted to him as well. I'm super uncomfortable with the whole "compelling someone to have sex", so anything between Damon and Noah is COMPLETELY consensual.

Also, more good luck and love to everyone stressed about their exams and a super large hug to MelissaIsLame! I hope you're not traumatized for life by that scorpion!

* * *

Damon just needed Clarissa out of his damn face for five minutes. That's all he was asking for. He just needed to take a breath without breathing her in, he just needed to take a moment to fucking _think_ without everything getting muddled up and twisted inside.

Slamming the door in her face was the only thing he could _think _of. It would piss her off, sure, but…

"I'm attracted to _Clare_."

Annoyance flashed hotly in Damon's stomach. He'd forgotten about Gothy. _Get in line_ was at the tip of his tongue as he spun around on his heels, but fuck that. There was no line, there was _only _Damon. Gothy was so below Clarissa's radar, he was surprised his human didn't leave her somewhere and forget. He didn't _like _Gothy, he didn't like that she clung to Clarissa's arm the whole night and sent him judgmental little stares.

"Shut _up_." He threw himself in the posh chair, moodily picking at the fabric. He slid his gaze toward Gothy who was eyeing him warily from the bed and shot her a sarcastic grin. "Don't be so tense, Gothy, I'm _not _interested."

But maybe he _should _be interested. He knew Clarissa was most likely going to be pissed off at him for kicking her from the room, so he might as well relieve some pent up sexual frustration. Especially since that's what she'd be pissed off at him for doing anyway. _And _it would be a victory over Gothy and her annoying infatuation with Clarissa. The closest she'd ever get to Clarissa was him, and he was well aware of her grudging attraction towards him.

Gothy gasped in surprise as he flitted in front of her, grabbing her by the neck and slamming her down on the bed. Behind the unease and terror in her wide eyed contact gaze was _lust_. Good. He crushed his mouth against hers with angry hunger, and it only took a few seconds before the gothic human was kissing him back in the same fashion.

He tore them from the bed, uncaring as she hit the ground with a stifled moan. Damon didn't know if it was out of pain or pleasure, and frankly he didn't give a damn. He pushed her legs apart with a knee, irritably hiking the damned frilly dress upward, and sank his fangs roughly into her neck. He needed a distraction.

And there's nothing like having a raw, angry, fuck on the floor of a posh hotel room followed by self-loathing and guilt. Not that Damon was feeling either of those two. _He _had nothing to feel guilty about. Not at all. Gothy, on the other hand, could hardly look at him, her cheeks burning with angry shame and guilt. As if she had _cheated _on Clarissa. Humans were _idiots_. Damon lounged, in complete and utter boredom, on the bed, Gothy's blood sprawling through him lazily. He flipped through the channels on the TV without any real interest, slowly twirling Witchy's talisman through his fingers.

Clarissa just had to fucking complicate everything. It was supposed to be simple: return to Mystic Falls, mess with Stefan while waiting for the stupid comet, retrieve the talisman, free Katherine, unleash twenty-six other pissed off vampires from the tomb and live happily fucking ever. But he sure as hell couldn't do that _now_.

He couldn't risk endangering Clarissa.

He waited a hundred and forty-fucking-five years and now that he had everything in fucking place, one stupid tiny human was bringing everything crashing to the ground around him. _Typical_. He should have seen this coming and now he was too caught up to do anything about it. For a single, terrible, moment, he had considered bringing her with him. But he _deserved_ to finally be with Katherine. _Just _Katherine. Uninterrupted, without anyone else to come between them… And, selfishly, he couldn't stand the thought of anyone else having Clarissa. He didn't want to share her, he wouldn't be able to do to her what Katherine did to him, either. No, Clarissa deserved stupid human things that would make her happy. She shouldn't have to share anyone. Or be shared.

Guilt slipped through his frustration. After he figured out how to free Katherine without freeing the others (maybe he'd just kill them in their weakened state) he was going to _leave_. If he were a better person, he would've stepped away and kept a distance from Clarissa. But he wasn't and he was going to spend every moment possible with her before he left her flat.

Damon felt _plagued _by time, haunted by it. He both wanted time to hurry up, as freeing Katherine had been something he'd desperately been waiting for, and wanted time to slow down. He _just _found Clarissa and he hardly spent any time with her. He wanted more, he needed more, it just wasn't _enough_. He could turn her into a vampire, and after spending a few good decades with Katherine, having some proper alone time, he could seek her out again. But that was _selfish_. How much longer did he have with Clarissa? Weeks? Less than a month? It just wasn't _enough_. That was mere _seconds_.

But no. No, this was right. He'd finally have his Katherine… And Clarissa deserved better. He _hurt _her. It's all he seemed to be good at doing, _hurting _people. He'd hurt her so often and so terribly that getting a fucking _tattoo _didn't even phase her. The thought of it made Damon feel sick, made his chest tighten miserably. He'd done more than just _hurt _her, he fucking _killed _her. What if she hadn't woken up?

His thoughts fell away as something blue and blinking caught his attention. He tilted his gaze away from the TV, toward the corner of the room. For a moment, he didn't comprehend what the hell he was looking at. Damon squinted his eyes, _staring _at it.

Plugged into the outlet was a flickering blue canary nightlight.

Damon froze.

There was a blue _fucking _canary nightlight in the hotel room.

And it had _not _been in the room before.

The blue canary nightlights that had littered Clarissa's home—she didn't put them there, he realized suddenly, and the only other person who knew the significance of the damned blue canary was Pretend Brother. …_Right_? An icy horror crept through Damon slowly, twisting around his chest like a snake, squeezing until he couldn't breathe.

He was ripping the bathroom door open before he could even catch up to his thoughts, his only focus was to find Clarissa and not let her out of his damn sight again until he could fucking figure out why the hell she was being stalked by fucking _nightlights_. Gothy jumped, hastily wiping her cheeks and staring at him angrily.

"You're leaving." He snapped, snatching her arm and hauling her from the bathroom. "Get your shit."

"I want to say goodbye to Clare." Gothy said quietly, inching away from him to grab her bag.

"Hurry the hell up." Damon hissed, narrowing his blue eyes as he concentrated for the sound of Clarissa's voice. Pain in his fucking ass.

* * *

"Oh—yeah, this," I tilted my bandaged wrist upward. "I actually just got a tattoo. My brother drew me a hummingbird." Pride swarmed upward warmly for Jeremy, my grin becoming fond. I still had to let him know Jeb liked his drawing enough to keep it for future clients.

If Elijah thought I was an idiot, he didn't show it on his face. Instead he merely gazed at me with rapt attention, his eyebrows raising ever so slightly. "Your brother must be quite the artist for you to willingly and permanently brand yourself with his work." Elijah was just so calm and proper, it was actually kind of adorable.

"Well if I'm going to have something on myself until I die, it might as well be something from family." I shifted a shoulder upward, not really wanting to get into the whole 'marking this body as my own' crap with him. Plus this just sounded a lot more well thought out and not crazy impulsive. "People and things come and go, but family is the only thing that is _truly _forever." And this tattoo decision totally wasn't made like a few hours ago because a stranger agreed with Damon about hummingbirds.

I didn't even really _like_ hummingbirds.

Something flickered across Elijah's gaze far too quickly for me to get a read on what it was just as the elevator doors whooshed open with a _ding_. He inclined his head toward the waiting lobby, gesturing for me to walk out, _ladies first_, which was just crap because I knew a symbol of power was to be the last person walking into a room.

Whatever.

Elijah drifted to my side a step behind me, and felt more like a looming threat than anything else. As though to reinforce who was in a position of control, he placed a hand on the small of my back, guiding me toward the lounge. Though maybe I was overthinking things. I couldn't help the shiver.

"I completely share your sentiments about family," his sharp gaze slid down to meet mine. "I have not seen my siblings in some years now."

"You seem like the kind of guy who could have any obstacle removed with a snap of a finger, so hop on that, Suits." Seriously, just pick up a phone and call them. Some people just liked to make life difficult. "How many siblings do you have?"

"Three brothers and a sister." Elijah murmured and Christ, that's a lot of kids. "Do you have more than just your brother? A sister, perchance?"

"Aw, you lookin' to replace me already?" I teased, completely done with the friendly small talk. I was here to be as obnoxious as I could. "You should know, Elijey-Wisey, that _I _am one of a kind. Irreplaceable."

"Fret not, you have my _complete_ and _undivided _attention." Elijah assured chivalrously, sweeping his hand through the air as though to banish any other possibility. It was almost boring, how _expected _it all was.

Of course he'd say that to _me_. To slight me in any sense would be terribly rude, and if there was one thing you couldn't be, it was rude.

"Mr. Mikaelson!" A balding man, looking like he was maybe in charge, squawked suddenly, immediately standing up straighter and rushing to us. _Mikaelson_? Why did that sound familiar…? _E. Mikaelson_. Bingo. Elijah, you dog, hoarding the most expensive room! "Is there something that I may assist you with?"

"Mmm. We're actually here for a late night _snack_." Elijah's tone was light but something about it struck me as _odd_, even if I couldn't place why. I knew that everyone would be literally throwing themselves at his feet to appease him (he was that kind of rich) but…

I realize he was faintly amused, like he was sharing in a private inside joke that nobody but him was in on it. _Strange_.

"If I had known you would be dining, I would have had your table prepared, I apologize deeply. My mistake, sir." The help broke out into a sweat, furiously turning his head. "Mick, put in an order for Mr. Mikaelson's usual and…"

"That will be unnecessary." Elijah dismissed idly, smiling politely as I picked at my nails. "This had been entirely unexpected. Sit us anywhere. I'll have a glass of _Gaja Barbaresco_." For a moment I wondered if Elijah was trying to _impress _me. But as the help led us into the empty lounge (I realized it had been closed), I figured Elijah might've actually been downplaying things so not to intimidate me with his overly rich ass self.

Pfft. As if.

"Excellent selection, Mr. Mikaelson! We will have that out to you immediately. And for you, Miss…?" he trailed off, realizing he didn't know my name, as he gestured to a table toward the back. Elijah tilted his head, almost as if he were curious as to what my surname was.

"Burgertit." I deadpanned, half amused, as Elijah's eyebrow quirked upward. He continued to smile at me politely. "I'd like to have cookie dough." This was outrageously fun, holy crap.

"Of course, of course, Miss Burgertit," the help agreed, pulling a chair out for me. "Excellent." He paused. "…Cookie dough _ice cream_?"

"Nope." I popped the _p _as I slid into the chair. "Put it in a nice little cup for me, Jenkins."

"It's Roberts, Miss." The help, Jenkins, attempted to correct and I merely stared at him. I already named him, he didn't get to change it. "Ah… yes, of course, Jenkins today, then, very good, Miss Burgertit, I couldn't have asked for a better name. Very clever. Would you also like a glass of _Gaja Barbaresco_?"

"Don't be silly, Jenkins, I'm having cookie dough and I'm _far _too young to be drinking." I grinned at him teasingly. "A glass of milk will be just fine."

"A fantastic choice, to be sure. What else would go better with cookie dough? I will have someone bring you your drinks immediately, and if there is anything you may need, I, or one of the other staff, will be sure to help you. Enjoy."

I watched Jenkins scurry away with increasing boredom, Elijah symbolized everything I had wanted to get away from (though he was to a whole another extreme I've never experienced before). While acting like a total brat was fun, being here was really exhausting. The lounge (though I was starting to suspect this was actually a restaurant) was stunning. The large crystal chandeliers had been dimmed to create a false sense of privacy. The floor was made out of white glossy marble and there were spiraling white, gold lined, columns that went up to the arched, hand designed, ceiling that had painted angels.

"Cookie dough?" Elijah's smooth, composed, voice tugged me out of my pouting thoughts and I grinned at him.

"I never had it before." I confessed with a laugh. While that was true, demanding cookie dough had been the most insane thing I could think of. I wanted a stronger reaction out of the help than just acceptance, but I guess maybe they were used to bratty rich kids.

The Lion King ringtone set for Damon went off, interrupting whatever Elijah was about to say, and I frowned. If he freakin' butt dialed me while having crazy sex, I was going to be so freakin' pissed off. Silencing the ringtone, I placed the phone on the table, ignoring the hurt that prickled. I had _no reason _to feel anything but miffed at being thrown from the room. _Did he think she was prettier than me_?

That was silly, nobody was prettier than me.

"Your friend?" Elijah inquired as another one of the help set down the glass of milk and his wine. "It's terribly disrespectful of him to leave your company for another woman."

As if _Noah _meant anything more than a fuckable snack. Guilt twisted against the bitter hurt—where the hell did that come from? I decided I had _liked _Noah. "It's whatever, that's his thing." I assured Elijah dismissively. Besides, a darker voice inside me whispered, Noah could never compare to me, not in looks, personality, _status! _Her clothes suggest her parents—

Elijah's fingers coiled around my wrist and I stared at him in shock, pulling my hand from his grasp. Rude! "I apologize for touching you without your permission, but it appeared that you were about to slap yourself." Elijah murmured and I blinked rapidly. I was about to slap myself…?

Oh _goddamn _it, Damon. I puffed my warm cheeks out, thankful to be over my stupid dark thoughts about Noah. She was a good person, and I liked her. Really. "Yeah about that…" I have an asshole vampire as a friend. "It's a total… Clockwork Orange thing going on. I'm trying to be less of a bitch and my friend is kind of conditioning me to smack the thoughts from me during trigger words or thoughts. It's terribly inconvenient, painful, and embarrassing."

"I am certain it would make for a _compelling_ story." Elijah spoke calmly, a ghost of a smile touching his face, his words like two puzzle pieces snapping together.

Suddenly everything made _so much sense_ and his brown eyes held mine steadily, well aware that I'd made the connection.

I stiffened.

Elijah was a vampire and I had something he _wanted_.

Why else would he be bothering with me? He hadn't accidentally bumped into me, either, this was _all _planned. I should have realized someone who commanded control and radiated with dangerous power like Elijah wouldn't just allow someone like _me _to pester them without a _reason_. I was a _fool_. I had thought, _stupidly _thought, he was merely being polite and courteous. We hadn't been making small talk, he had been _digging_. But for what?

What could he possibly… _Oh_.

All at once, everything was so clear.

I tilted my head, regarding him. He said, earlier today, that I resembled someone he once _knew_.

Katherine.

Elijah must never know that Elena looked like Katherine. It was imperative. I didn't know why, but I would find out, because there was no piece of information that could hide from me once I decided to search for it. Somehow, the fact that I looked like Katherine had _meant _something. Her bloodline, maybe? Was her bloodline important? Apparently, if this little bloodsucker was indulging me.

"It would appear that it was not just I who concealed their true nature," Elijah commented on, his words poised and curt, his gaze piercing. "You are far from the ditzy child I presumed you to be."

I could insult him, tell him he's exactly what I perceived him to be: an entitled rich shmuck who happened to be _dead_. But out right insulting someone like Elijah would be a foolish mistake, men in power like him would unthinkingly know exactly how to make someone like _me _pay. Not to mention he was a _vampire_. But to let him _walk all over me_ wasn't acceptable, either. I leaned back in the chair with the intent to appear self-confident and _bored_, crossing one leg over the other.

"What do you want?" I decided on, slanting my chin upward, assessing him imperturbably. "What is it that you think I can offer you, _Suits_?"

An almost lethal smile crept across his face. "Will you not call me by my name, Clarissa?" Elijah's voice was patient, the s's in my name slicing like razors. He tilted his head away from me and I almost sighed in relief, his gaze had every inch of me on high alert, my muscles stiff, urging me to spring out of the chair and run.

"There you are." Noah's soft voice had my head turning toward the gothic girl and I flashed her a cheerful smile, easily sliding back into myself.

Damon was hovering by her side, blue eyes sliding from me to Elijah, his dark hair mussed. Despite the slight pinch in my chest at his I-Just-Had-Awesome-Sex hair, seeing him brought a wave of _relief_.

I stood, feeling completely safe again. "Hey guys." Translation: GET ME THE HELL AWAY FROM ELIJAH! Both of them picked up on it immediately, Noah reaching for my hand while Damon's eyes narrowed.

"Damon said you two wouldn't mind walking me home." Noah's fingers curled around mine, drifting us back to Damon's side. I tilted my head back to Elijah who was still sitting, the glass of his stupid wine in his hands, eyes locked onto mine.

"Rain check, Suits. Sorry." I said cheerfully. Burn you fucker.

"Of course, Clarissa. I'm certain you and I will see each other again." Elijah's tone was friendly and the lingering threat between his words had my heart stammering in a fit of nauseated terror.

"I look forward to it, cutie." I tossed back with a wink, because like _hell _I would let him intimidate me and have the satisfaction of seeing it. "Ta-ta."

Apparently walking Noah home meant walking a block and stuffing her into a cab, after compelling her to never revel anything that had happened tonight to anyone. I threw her into a huge hug, giving her the purple glitter bracelet. Out of friendship. And mostly because I felt really guilty about thinking such shitty thoughts about her. Noah was _my _friend anyway, not Damon's. I was also aware of Damon's piercing gaze on me as I continued to bounce up and down, waving goodbye to the taxi until I could no longer see it.

"Clarissa…" Damon's fingers were curling around my arm, turning me around to face him as he refocused my attention to him completely. "What the _hell _was that about? Acting like an Everett?"

I could tell Damon how I felt about Elijah, I could tell Damon about Elijah's interest in Katherine (and possibly Elena). I could tell him how fucking unnerved I was about the whole thing. But I think I could safely say I knew Damon well enough to know how he'd react, and confronting or threatening Elijah would only lead to trouble right now. And I was _Clarissa_, I hid behind _no one_. So I smiled.

"I'm finding ways around slapping myself, D. I'm clever as _hell_. And being an Everett was necessary. He was wearing a million dollar watch."

Damon grasped my shoulders, staring down at me seriously. "You'd tell me if something… unusual was going on around you, wouldn't you?" His voice was soft and I furrowed my brow. Were we still talking about Elijah? "If anything _strange _happened lately or made you uneasy? You'd _tell _me, right?"

"I'm pretty sure." I didn't know what he was talking about. "The only strange and unusual things happening in my life usually revolves around you and being a body snatcher, so…" I trailed off awkwardly. "How was the sex?"

"Amazing." He didn't even miss a beat, a taunting smirk growing across his handsome face. Damon leaned closer to me. "_Jealous_?"

Shit, I probably was. Gross. "You didn't do it on the bed, did you?" I frowned, as we walked back to the hotel. "I really don't wanna sleep in that."

"We did it everywhere but the bed," Damon assured me and that really didn't make me feel any better. My face crinkled with my displeasure. So gross.

"Well…" I patted his arm, not really sure what to say. "Glad you got some, then. Just don't be such a dick about it next time. Do you usually do your meals, so I know for future reference?"

"Mmhm, usually."

Comfortable silence slid between us, though most of my thoughts now were focused on Elijah. I was burning to know everything about him and _Katherine_. My gaze flickered toward Damon. As soon as we were safe distance from the city, I was going to drill him for information. He noticed my look, his expression tilting toward curious and I caught a lingering look of concern in his blue gaze.

"I guess if sugar was in a person form, I would have sex with it too." I said lightly, trying to distract myself from these new, possibly dramatic, developments. I suddenly had a feeling that being sisters with a main character in a vampire TV show was going to be filled with a lot of stupid vampire drama.

"I honestly thought you'd be more pissed off at me." Damon completely ignored what I said, which was hilarious and he should've been laughing. We were in the elevator now.

"I was. For a few minutes. But..." I puffed out a breath, not really wanting to talk about serious things. I needed more distractions. "Do you know why you're wrong on so many levels?" Damon opened his mouth, surprise flickering across his face. I grinned at him, running my fingers down all numbed buttons, causing them to instantly all light up. "Because I pressed all the buttons! Haaa!" I burst into laughter as the elevator dinged, the doors opening at the second floor.

Damon incredulous stare faded away pretty quickly, a grin stretching. "Good. Now we can stand here for twenty-three floors. You brought this upon yourself."

It got boring as hell after the third time the elevator stopped. I started daring Damon to do things before the elevator doors could close, like using his vampire speed to flash across the hall and steal things. We now had three paintings and two plants in the elevator with us.

I was currently trying to balance a white china vase with purple orchids on top of my head while standing on one foot. Damon suddenly appeared in the elevator just as the doors were closing with a plush brown chair. I burst into laughter, causing the plant to fly off my head. He didn't even bother catching it.

"Too bad we don't have more people with us, we could have played musical chairs." I said wistfully. Damon scoffed, easily sliding the chair to the center of the elevator.

"We never need more people. Let's up the game a bit, though…" his grin was positively evil and it sent a rush of excitement through me. "Whoever has the most wins by the time we reach our floor gets to name their prize." Yeah _okaaay_.

I knew how this worked.

I read fanfictions.

"You'll win because you're a fucking cheater, and then you'll be like, oops, I win, I want a kiss!" I waved my hands about, pretending to be him. "Or sex. Sex in the elevator, you _agreed_ to it Clary!"

Damon rolled his eyes. "It won't be like that, I'm not _that _big of a jerk. And I won't cheat. I promise." His feral smirk said otherwise.

"Your promises mean nothing." Like seriously. Damon tugged me closer to him, tapping the tip of my nose affectionately with a finger.

"If _you_ win, I'll get a temporary tramp stamp tattoo of Minnie Mouse and walk around as your kitty bitch for an entire day. You can lead me around town." Damon purred lowly and I stared at him in surprise. Oh my _God_. The sheer possibility of that happening made me want to agree.

I would never stop laughing.

"And if you win?" I asked, eyeing him curiously. Damon slid an arm around my shoulders, a teasing grin on his lips.

"You get to be _my _kitty bitch for the day."

I knew Damon wasn't going to let me win.

But I found myself agreeing to it anyway. Because the possibility of me somehow winning and dragging him around like that was _too good _to pass up on.

So like idiots that could easily be mistaken as drunks, we pranced around the plush chair until the elevator _dinged _and the doors whooshed open. And then it was a dive for the chair. The first few floors, I'm sure Damon had purposely let me win just so I believed I had a chance of winning. Because after that I either found myself sprawled on the elevator floor or awkwardly in his lap. Goddamn vampire bastard.

_Ding_.

Damon easily slid between me and the chair, plopping down before I even had a friggin' chance. He grinned cockily at me, lounging lazily like he were the king of the elevator. But as the doors whooshed open the laughter died in my throat.

A familiar sharp brown gaze met mine causing my heart to jump. Elijah stood on the other side and despite his calm expression I was certain he was surprised to see me again. For a moment we merely stared at each other. A second later, I realized Jenkins was standing next to him looking about ready to faint. I also noticed Elijah was gripping Jenkins' arm, as if they had been in the middle of a heated argument, or maybe Elijah was about to drag him into the elevator. Things clearly weren't boding well for Jenkins.

"Oh! Miss Burgertit!" Jenkins squeaked, trying to smile at me. He looked dismayed when his gaze flickered past me, toward the mess. "I… I see that you're enjoying your stay, very good!"

"Clarissa," Elijah acknowledge pleasantly, like he wasn't a creepy vampire.

"Suits, Jenkins," I greeted just as pleasantly, smiling. "We're playing musical chairs. Room for one more!" I grabbed Jenkins' arm and yanked the trembling man into the elevator car with us. Elijah wanted Jenkins for something, which meant now I wanted Jenkins _more_. "Sorry Suits, looks like you'll have to find another game!"

"We were in the middle of an important discussion." Elijah began as I slammed my hand against the button to close the elevator doors.

"Bite me." I blew Elijah a kiss, just to drive my meaning clearer, and his brown eyes locked with mine, glinting with dark promises, as the doors whooshed shut in his face. It was impulsive and possibly stupid, but I was Clarissa, damn it. I spun around, grabbing Jenkins by the shoulders. "We're going to play a whole new game." I glanced at Damon who was watching me with narrowed blue eyes. "If I asked, would you compel him for me?"

"_Any_thing for you, Claryberry." Damon's tone was light, but under it was an edge. He wanted me to explain. With cat like grace, Damon slid to his feet, pulling Jenkins to him. "What do you want him to do…?"

"When we shove him from the elevator, he's to get into another one, hit all the buttons, and hop from elevator to elevator, repeating the process, until he gets to the lobby. He's to take out a large amount of money from his bank, and immediately head for the airport where he'll take the first flight out of the country. If he ever sees Elijah again, he'll run in the opposite direction and whatever it is that Elijah wants from him, he'll sooner bite off his own tongue than tell Elijah what he wants to know."

I didn't know if Jenkins was important to Elijah, but I would make it hell for the bastard anyway. At least then Elijah will have to refocus his energy on tracking down Jenkins instead of following after me. Or this would blow up in my face by pissing him off. Worst case scenario was a pissed off and vengeful vampire. But at least then I'd have some time to find out everything I can about Elijah and hopefully have multiple backup plans. I would _not _be intimidated, I would _not _be backed scared into a corner.

I jumped as fingers brushed against mine, turning to look up at Damon. His blue eyes were fixed on my face. I realized we were alone in the elevator now and released a breath. Elijah was _such _a little buzz kill.

"I'm tired." I murmured softly, tilting my eyes away from Damon's piercing gaze. I felt like he could see right through me and I didn't want him to know about Elijah or my fears yet. "I don't want to play anymore."

"Who was that?" Damon pried gently, quietly, and I picked at the bandage around my wrist as the doors whooshed open with a ding. For half a second, I was afraid Elijah would be waiting, angry and vengeful.

But he wasn't.

"Mr. Roberts, I renamed him Jenkins." I said softly. "He was going to get me cookie dough and put it in a fancy cup. I never had cookie dough—"

"I thought you were trying to get back at me for sleeping with Gothy." Damon cut over me, pulling me closer to him. "I thought you were trying to make me jealous, flirting with him like that. But I realize… Clary, what did he say to you to make you act like this? What did he do?"

I pulled away from him. "I'm tired." I didn't want to talk about this now. I was sure Elijah was listening in, anyway. "It's fine, D. Let's just drop it."

"You tell me everything. I'm your stupid canary, so why are you hiding this from me? If he did something… Clarissa, this isn't you." Damon's fingers were wrapping around my arm, pulling me back to him again. Frustration boiled. I said I wanted to _drop it_. "You don't keep shit from me, you don't hide from me. What the hell did he do to make you—"

"Drop it, Damon." I shot him a look and he narrowed his blue eyes at me. "You're being _dramatic_."

"Talk to me or I'll _make _you tell me." He threatened quietly which threw me into a rage. I ripped out of his hold. Fucking _sick _of being _threatened_ by stupid vampires.

Smashing my fingers against the angry bright red _STOP _button, I turned to face him as the elevator stilled, the lights dimming as an annoying buzzing went off. Damon stared at me like I was doing something _crazy_.

"Can he hear us?" I asked quietly, trying to keep my anger in check. "Elijah is a vampire. Now I need you to be fucking honest with me, Damon, because what we're going to talk about, I need to know he can't hear me."

"No. He won't be able to hear us with the noise if we speak quietly." Damon kept his narrowed gaze locked on me. "What did he say to you? Did he threaten you?"

I shoved him backwards, his knees hitting the back of the chair causing him to ungracefully topple backwards into the chair. I plopped down on top of him before he could move, straddling his hips. He stiffened under me, his eyes widening slightly.

"Clarissa, what the hell—?" He began and I pushed him back against the chair, my hands pressed into his chest.

"Tell me everything you know about Katherine." It wasn't a request. Damon stared at me. "Was someone after her?"

"_What_…?"

"Was she important? Did she piss off another vampire? Is there something significant about the reason why Elena looks exactly like her?" It was frustrating. More than ever I wish I knew more about the show, I wish I could just _google _it. "Who turned her? How old was she?" I paused, Damon staring back at me in completely taken aback shock. "…Did she even tell you anything at all about herself?" It was a low blow, but I _needed _answers. And if she was secretive that would bring up a whole string of other things to consider. "How long did you know her for? Did you _really _know her…?"

Anger flashed across Damon's face. "Clarissa," he began lowly, rage clipping his tone, my name soaked with a warning. He was getting defensive, hurt and angry at the direction of this conversation. _Interesting_. Did that mean she told him nothing? And if that was the case… Did that mean she was running? Hiding? Was she using Damon and Stefan?

"Was your relationship purely sexual?" I asked quietly. "Did she seduce you, Damon? Did you know anything at all about her? Where she was born? Who she was before she was turned? Her plans for the future? Did she _move around _a lot…? What was her favorite _color_?"

"Screw you." Damon snapped furiously. "How about _that_? What the fuck is this? Twenty fucking questions? What the fuck does it _matter _to _you_?"

"Because _I _resemble _Katherine_, Damon!" I blurted out, hurt and angry by his anger even if I understood why he was reacting this way. I felt frazzled, my nerves were boarding on being fried, and I loathed being in the dark on things I _should know_. "I need to know everything about her, so I can _ensure _my own safety! I was stupid, I didn't _realize_, I should have realized—he planned it all, bumping into me. I look like Katherine, and I don't know why that's important! And for the first time in my life, I have people I want to protect! Elena looks like Katherine for a _reason_ and I must figure out why before he finds out about her! And I'm afraid." My anger was winding down. I felt bare, exposed. I stared at Damon almost helplessly. "I'm afraid for the people I've come to love."

The brutal truth of my own realization left me feeling raw. There had only been what my mother wanted. And then there had been what _I _wanted. But here…? Here I _had _a real family, friends who loved me for _me_, even if I wasn't Clarissa Gilbert. And I _loved _them back. It was terrifying and I was frightened beyond anything I'd ever felt before. I'd never _really _felt fear before. Not for someone else. Oddly enough, I didn't feel at all weakened by it. I felt everything that I thought I knew about myself shifting.

All of Damon's anger had faded with my confession. He gently took my face in his hands, bringing my attention back to him and out of my stunned, numb, thoughts. Lightly, his thumbs caressed my cheeks, his gaze soft.

"I will _never _let anything happen to you." He vowed quietly and I stilled. "I was human and weak and I couldn't protect Katherine, I couldn't save her, but that's—"

"I am not Katherine." I said quietly. "You die trying to save me and it will be the biggest mistake you'll ever make, Damon. I will find a way to bring you back to life, or back to the undead, and I will make you suffer." I pulled his hands from my face, staring at him seriously. "I don't _want_ to be protected, I want information and I want to destroy anyone who will pose a threat to me or Elena."

Damon held my gaze for a moment. "Clarissa…" he murmured, a smirk curving across his lips as he threaded his fingers through my hair. His blue eyes glowed with a mischievous, almost sinister, glint. I shivered. "Maybe you _should_ become a vampire."

He grasped my hips, pressing me firmly into him, his fingers tight, and I nearly gasped in surprise. His half lidded blue gaze was searing, burning everything from me until there was only _him_ that blazed through my veins. I suddenly felt too hot, felt like I couldn't catch my breath, or look anywhere but into his overwhelming gaze. The heat wrapped around me, a pulse of _need _bouncing through me.

"I am at your command, Clarissa," Damon growled lowly, his hands slowly sliding up my sides. I was melting to his touch. _Oh, God. Oh, God_. "I will do _whatever _you want, hunt down _anyone _you ask me to." His voice was soft, filled with conviction, and spoken in such a low, coaxing, silky way that it urged me to surrender every inch of myself to him.

My eyelids fluttered shut as his hot fingers grazed over my jaw, stroking, tilting my head to the side. I let him, completely at his mercy. At this very moment there was nothing that I wanted, or needed, more badly than Damon. His soft caresses, the way he was gripping me to him, the way he spoke to me, ripped every single thought from my mind and plunged me into a hazy state. Desire rolled over me like a humid fog, thick and damp, clinging to me heavily. I couldn't think and I didn't want to.

Damon brushed his mouth against my cheek sending a jolt of pleasure through me, my everything leaping with excited need. Every inch of me cried out for him, for his touch, begging me to ask him to do _more_. He gripped me closer, my chest nearly against his, and as though he could read my thoughts, he slowly moved his mouth across my jaw. Everywhere his lips met, lingering a moment longer than the last, my skin lit up and tingled almost painfully. My fingers curled, the whole world was spinning. I nearly couldn't stand it as the pleasure pierced through me. He continued, terribly slowly, down my neck. His arm crept up my back, his fingers weaving through my hair as his other hand gripped my waist. All I wanted was Damon. All that mattered was _Damon_ and what his hands, what his mouth, were _doing _to me.

His hot breath drifted across my skin causing me to shiver, his fingers tightening in my hair as he tilted my head further to the right. A soft noise of pleasure slipped out of my mouth as his fangs scrapped over the base of my neck, my cheeks heating as desire pooled at the pit of my stomach almost uncomfortably. Oh, _God_.

"Tell me no, Clarissa," he breathed but I couldn't _think_, couldn't understand why I would ever deny Damon anything at all. I found I could only give a soft moan of _need_.

His fangs gently met my skin again, slowly, almost hesitantly, sinking in—pain broke across me and I stumbled on a gasp of surprise, my eyes flying open as the sharp, pinching, pain washed over me and shattered into blistering rapture that shook me to the core, consuming every inch of me with a fiery lust that twisted around me so completely.

* * *

Clarissa's blood was deliciously sweet in his mouth and Damon nearly moaned in delight. Everything inside him erupted ecstatically, hurtling him into a blazing euphoria. Her blood bounced against every inch of him, it was like swallowing sparks, swallowing sunlight, swallowing _Clarissa's_ inner being and Damon was going ballistic. He could scarcely think, all his attention focused on his little human and the blood dancing through him. But then she _whimpered _and Damon was pulling back from her before her hands were even on his chest to push him back.

Everything had been so burning and bright, Damon was having trouble adjusting, it all suddenly seemed so _dark_ and Clarissa's heartbeat frantically pulsed inside of him. She was shaking, out of breath, and turned away from him.

He was dizzy, he was still reeling from the explosion that was her blood, and he was suddenly flooded with dread. "Cla—" he began urgently, nearly pleadingly. She stumbled off his lap, backing away from him and he was rigidly aware of every movement she made, his gaze locked onto her.

"_Give me a minute_," she hissed back, voice thick, wavering and something inside Damon twisted painfully, a horror filling him—her panic became _his _panic. He was standing, inching toward her. "Don't!" She was fumbling with the buttons on the elevator. He hardly acknowledged the jolt, signaling the elevator had started to move again.

She hated him! He hurt her! She couldn't face him, she couldn't stand the sight of him! He fucked _everything _up, and he was spiraling, he felt a wild desperate need to make it _right_. He couldn't lose Clarissa, not Clarissa, he needed her! She was his human! She was his! He could make her understand, and better yet, he could make her _forget_. He reached out to her, his fingers sliding across her wrist—

Clarissa's mouth slammed against his and everything inside Damon exploded, flinging him back into the bright euphoria he'd ripped himself from. He stumbled as she pulled him closer, his hands were winding in her soft hair before he could even process what he was doing. Any rational thought that had clung to him left, because this was _Clarissa_, and she was _kissing _him. He leaned into her, backing her into the wall. Her blood seared through him, _singing _at the contact, bouncing through him like he were a pinball machine. He was completely swept up in her, he wanted to kiss her forever. Her hands slid up his chest, curling around his neck, pulling him flush against her as the kiss grew more urgent, more heated. Her heart was dancing, twirling, fluttering and it felt like it was _inside _him, pulsing, urging him on. He pressed his body into hers tightly against the wall causing her to _moan_ and a sharp hiss of lust tore through him at the sound. He was going to lose it.

Damon thrust his tongue into her mouth hungrily, _needing _more, needing to taste her. Her tongue slid against his and he groaned, his fingers tightening possessively in her hair. Her tongue was so fucking _soft_, and her mouth was so fucking _sweet_, it was driving him wild. Clarissa pulled his tongue deeper into her mouth, sucking on it, her hunger matching his. With a jolt, Damon realized she was sucking her own blood off his _tongue_. He couldn't fucking remember the last time a human had gotten him so fucking hot. And this was _Clarissa_, with her soft tongue and her sweet mouth. Clarissa who never kissed before but was kissing _him_ like _this_. She was _his _human and he was going to—

His phone burst into shrill rings and he nearly swore. Three fuckin' guesses who was the caller. He was going to _kill _Stefan. Why the fuck was he being called at 2AM? Clarissa jerked back from him in complete shock which speared through him, her fingers flying up to touch her mouth.

He stared down at her, drinking her in with an almost feverish hunger. Clarissa was panting, cheeks stained with red, her lips so fucking puffy, eyes bright with desire. But then there was the realization brimming across her expression. The fuck did she have to look guilty for? He wanted to grab her and kiss her again. So badly. Everything inside of him was burning for her, aching. He needed to touch her, he was going to lose his fucking head if he didn't.

"Are you going to answer that?" Clarissa's voice was husky and Damon had forgotten that his phone was even ringing.

"No." Damon couldn't hide the obvious hunger from his voice even if he wanted to. Clarissa trembled and Damon realized that she hadn't been shaking with fear before. She had been trembling with desire.

"I couldn't control myself," she whispered, eyes wide.

"I don't want you to control yourself." He crept closer, his aching fingertips ghosting over her wrist, her blood inside of him immediately bursting with glee at the contact. He felt dizzy. He felt confused. "I told you. With me, you can do and say whatever you want."

"It hurt. When you bit me, it _hurt_," she whispered breathlessly. "And I _liked _it. I really, _really_, liked it. But we… Damon, we _can't_. You can't let me…"

Frustration flickered. She wanted him just as badly as he wanted her, this was _stupid_. What the hell was she holding on for? She could _trust _him, he wasn't someone asshole who'd—

_Katherine_.

He froze. Guilt slammed into him, crushing and drowning out the lust so quickly he almost felt sick. Would Clarissa ever forgive him if she found out Katherine was still alive? That he was planning on freeing her so they could be together again? She trusted him so thoroughly and he'd let his control slip, he kissed her back. He let things escalate. He shouldn't have put his mouth on her in the first place. He _knew _what kissing meant to her and here he was, selfishly wanting more. He ruined her first kiss—in a fit of out of control lust in an elevator? That wasn't special. That wasn't romantic.

Clarissa deserved so much _more_. She deserved fireworks. She deserved something sweet and disgustingly romantic and stupidly human and here he was, pawing at her hungrily. Clarissa deserved to be kissed by someone who was going to put _her _first, who would love her and only her. It didn't matter if the idea of her kissing anyone else made him feel crazy. He couldn't be selfish, she was his birdhouse. And he _loved _Katherine.

She was relying on him.

_FUCK_.

He was careful not to touch her for the duration of the elevator ride, though he very much wanted to and was very sure Clarissa yearned for his touch just as terribly. The fact that he had to deprive himself of her skin was fucking bullshit. It was a constant throb against his pad of his fingertips. Though to be fair, every inch of him was pulsing to be closer. It was like a burn that would only be soothed at her touch. Damon was having a hell of a hard time concentrating, everything felt heightened. _Beyond _the usual.

"Are you mad at me?" Clarissa's voice was small and uncertain as she trailed after him into their room. He didn't like her this way, and worst off, he didn't like that he could feel her fear. It was so _tangible_.

"No," Damon opened the bathroom door, flicking the lights on. The marble bathroom sprang to life, the white nearly blinding for a moment. He tilted his head to look back at her. Clarissa was hovering in the doorway, eyes wide. "Come here, birdhouse. Let me take care of things." He forced himself to coo to her, to sound relaxed.

He bit into his wrist harder than he needed to.

"Gonna take care of things in here instead of the elevator. Much classier. Thanks, D." She crept closer to him, attempting to lighten the mood, and Damon knew they would both pretend it had worked.

He was going to erase this from her the moment she healed. She deserved a proper first kiss, from someone who wasn't _him_, and Damon couldn't stand this meek, hesitant, Clarissa. He couldn't stand that he did this—that he'd been too selfish, too consumed with what _he _wanted to think of the damned consequences.

She had drove him wild, sitting on his lap, talking like _that_. That _fucking _vampire had frightened her, another reason why Katherine would have wait, he'd have to find out what this Elijah _wanted_ with Katherine. With Clarissa. Damon refused to acknowledge the shimmer of relief that whispered through him at the prospect of spending more time with his human.

Clarissa's skin met his and like a wave, a calmness washed over Damon, her blood inside of him _purring _with delight. She brought his wrist to her mouth, cheeks drenched with heat. Damon was swept up in her again. The way she had taken control of the conversation, had shoved him down and sat on him, demanding answers—while it had startled him (and pissed him off), Damon found himself being turned on. Clarissa was fucking sexy as hell when she behaved like that. He _liked _her taking control, and the chilling look she had, the cold fire in her gaze, when she told him she meant to destroy anyone threatening her—_fuck_. It had ignited a dark, _twisted_, excitement inside of him.

Clarissa suddenly sprang backwards from him, her eyes widening and Damon jolted.

"I'm a Time Lord!" She burst out, horrified, placing a hand over her chest.

"_What_?" Damon was suddenly assaulted with a growing sense of confused panic, his heart (_her heart_?) beating erratically.

"I have two hearts!" Clarissa was panicking, and in turn so was Damon. It struck him like a blow to the chest, every inch of him on high alert, his fangs sliding out. Clarissa choked, eyes wide, as she began to hyperventilate. "I… I—I… I don't…"

"Clary," Damon felt the world under him being ripped away as he fought to gain control. "You have to calm down, you're giving me an anxiety attack! I'm a fucking vampire, it's not good! Calm the fuck down!"

Fear exploded through him and he hissed. Clarissa was backing away and Damon realized that she was frightened. _Of him_. Misery tore through him and she clutched the sink, trying to keep herself standing as she gasped.

"Why are you upset?" She choked on a sob. "Stop it Damon! Stop it!" Confusion spiraled through him and he was peeling her from the counter, pulling her close to him with the only thought to soothe her, to keep her from crying. It was beyond his control, he _had _to touch her.

And suddenly everything was calm, like he hadn't just been thrown into a spastic, confused, panic. Clarissa tilted her head up, staring up at him with a look of confusion. But she was no longer crying. Her hands were gripping his, as if she had felt the same urgency to touch him as he felt for her. Damon blinked owlishly.

What the fuck was going on?

Gently, Damon brushed his thumb across her wet cheek and was shocked at the pulse of pure, singing, joy that danced through him, her blood twirling in the pads of his fingers. He felt _horror _but he knew it wasn't his own horror. Was it _hers_? How was that even fucking possible? Clarissa's cheeks warmed and, fascinated, Damon lightly trailed his fingers slowly over her skin. Everywhere he touched lit up, a sweet, affectionate, happiness sweeping through him so strongly that it stole his breath. He felt dazed.

"Is this how you feel when I touch you?" Damon didn't know why he asked, she couldn't possibly be feeling this—or know what he was feeling at this very moment.

But Clarissa nodded, pressing his hand against the side of her face, gazing up at him almost in a _doe _like way. Damon stared at her in a state of dazed wonder. Her happiness at his touch spilled over every inch of him, sweet and warm. It pulled at the strings of his heart. Damon had never felt so _adored_, so admired or cherished. He gently lifted her hand, pressing it against his cheek. He wanted to show her how he delighted, relished, _needed_, her touch. How he always, _always_, felt his calmest when her skin was on his.

A smile broke across her face, her blue-gray eyes twinkling and Damon grinned back at her, feeling stupidly giddy. "Does this always happen when sharing blood?" She asked, gently running her fingers across his face.

"I've never experienced this before." Damon murmured, bringing her fingers to his mouth and kissing her skin softly. His own happiness and her delighted glee tangled and he scooped her closer to him. He never wanted her fluttering heartbeat to leave his chest. "I don't even know how this is _possible_." But it was _Clarissa_, everything surrounding her was always a new experience for him, a new exception to some kind of rule.

Damon tucked a strand of stray hair behind her ear, gently brushing his fingers against her skin. He had one arm curled around her, having Clarissa nestled against him comfortably as he leaned against the counter. He could stay like this for an eternity. If things had been different. It was almost cruel, knowing such a happiness was at the tips of his fingers but could never truly be _his_. He nearly felt guilty. Katherine was waiting for him to rescue her and what was he doing? Being happy. _With someone else_.

"I'm… Sorry I'm an ass." Damon sighed after a moment. He was a _bastard_. He was _using _Clarissa, wasn't he? In the worst kind of way. Using her for a temporary happiness fix until he got his Katherine. This is what this was. Nothing more. "I ruined your first kiss."

She pulled back from him and paused. He wondered if Clarissa could feel the pang that shot through him, the stupid longing, or if she was feeling it herself. Still, she withdrew, and grinned faintly at him. "Stop getting F.A.N.G.S at me. Nothing is _ruined_. I kissed_ you_, anyway. So. Uh. My bad." She shifted, awkwardly, clearly embarrassed.

Damon rolled his eyes. "Mm. But I threw you in that state. If I had respected your… _Disney _virtues, none of it would have happened."

"It's a two-way street, we're both equally to blame. I knew better than to sit in your lap, and I could've told you _no _at any time." Clarissa puffed out a breath, her gaze shifting away from him in a thoughtful sort of way, her shoulders slumping. She seemed so calm and indifferent, so Damon was surprised to feel the unease brimming. "We just... Have to be more careful next time. I won't sit on your lap, and you won't bite me. I think we'll be good."

"I can feel you." Damon reminded after a beat, a little peeved that she wasn't being completely honest how she felt. "I don't like it when you pretend." Clarissa flushed and huffed, causing Damon's mouth to twitch upward.

"I'm just irked. I _just _got done telling myself that I absolutely cannot let this stupid crap take control, and then I'm kissing you anyway." Clarissa ran her fingers through her hair, a nervous habit. He knew she was itching to drum her fingers against something. "It kind of sucks, D, that something can mean so much to me and nothing to you."

That _hurt_. Her gaze snapped to his, surprise twinkling through him from her end and Damon knew he had to make her _believe _it meant nothing to him. "Yeah, don't rub it in. It won't happen again, Claryberry, I _mean _it." He lied easily, grinning at her. "I can't have you falling in love with me. Gotta keep true to my stud life."

He hoped she didn't feel the twinge of disappointment that flickered at the whoosh of relief that went through her. Their intense connection forged by ingesting one another's blood seemed to be fading, and Damon wasn't sure if that was a blessing or something that would cause the ache for her to grow in his chest.

"Pfft. You wish." Clarissa yawned, stretching her arms. "Shit, I'm tired."

"To bed, then." Damon stilled, gazing at her. A new anxiety bloomed across him—what if this caused her to decide to put a distance between them? "As long as you're still comfortable with me…" Clarissa raised her eyebrows at him, amusement dancing across her expression.

"Jeez, D, you must be tired as fuck," she said with a laugh, gently linking her fingers with his and pulling him from the bathroom. "Even if I wasn't, you'd still drag me into bed with you. You'd be like 'I hope you don't expect me to take the floor' and then dive into the bed and sprawl out. Like the goddamn king of vampire dickery."

Damon _was _tired—he must've been. His gaze flickered toward the blue canary nightlight and he glowered. Why did things have to start becoming so _complicated_? Couldn't he, for once, just have things go easily? Clarissa huffed, kicking her shoes off.

"I finally know what you're like." She said, crawling into the large bed and drawing his attention back to her. "You're a cat. Cats are the asshole sociopaths of the animal kingdom. You're like pet me, and then you hiss and then you're like hey where you goin' asshole, where's my pets? And you knock things off from high places…" she yawned, as he kicked off his own shoes. "And you stare at nothing in the corner of the room. Do you know how freaky that is?"

Damon frowned. Stare at _nothing_…? He glanced back to the nightlight that seemed to glow mockingly back at him. Did Clarissa not _see _it? ...Was she kidding?

"D, I'm serious, quit it!" She hissed, throwing one of the pillows at him. "I'll be paranoid all night that something is there!"

What the _hell _did that mean? She couldn't see the nightlight? Damon flickered next to her on the bed, scooping her into his arms and nuzzling into her hair. "Shhh, I'll keep you safe!" He teased, deciding not to tell her anything about the nightlights. It was another worry she didn't have to concern herself with, he could, and would, take care of it. Damon wrapped his arms around her tightly causing the tiny human to squeak and struggle.

"D!" She cried, trying to flail but he kept her pinned against him tightly.

"What? You can kiss me, but we can't _cuddle_?" Damon whined loudly. "You _used _me! I feel so cheap!" Although he couldn't feel her heart fluttering inside him anymore, he could still _hear _it. He tilted his head, grinning down devilishly at her. Clarissa's cheeks were pink. His grin tugged into a haughty smirk. "Claaaary," he gasped, as though surprised. "Are you _attracted _to me?"

She puffed her cheeks out. "No, Damon. This is how I normally go to bed. Racing pulse, indecent thoughts, feeling feverish. This is all very typical."

Amused, he slid under the covers with her, loosening his playful grip on his human. He was delighted when she merely shifted to get more comfortable, snuggling into his chest, draping an arm around his torso.

"Fangs?" He wondered after a few moments of silence. He realized he wasn't going to be able to sleep well with that damn nightlight glowing mockingly at him from the corner of the room. She stirred, obviously about to fall asleep.

"Fucking angsty no good Stefan." Clarissa clarified, her voice thick with sleep. A grin twitched across his face. He wondered if she came up with some of this crap on the spot or if she spent time thinking them up.

Damon figured she probably came up with them on the spot, she didn't typically have the attention span to stick to one train of thought for very long.

"Hey Claryberry?"

"Mm?"

"Since you forfeited playing musical chairs, I _win_."

She groaned miserably causing Damon's grin to smugly settle across his face. Clarissa wasn't going to get out of this and Damon couldn't _wait_.

* * *

I know, super short compared to the monster I uploaded for last chapter. Next chapter is going to the start of new things/Elena learning about vampires, so I kind of wanted to end NYC in its own chapter. THANK YOU EVERYONE WHO TOLD ME WHAT THEY WANTED TO SEE! I have some great ideas already written up that I hope you'll be pleased with!

I HOPE you guys aren't disappointed with Clajah (Thank you RealHuntress18 for the name :D), I know you guys want Elijah and Clarissa to have fun and be friends but realistically I couldn't imagine Elijah giving annoying!Clarissa time of day. Plus with the way she looks... That makes Elijah realize Katherine must've had children before becoming a vampire. This also is going to bring The Originals into Mystic Falls during season 1. Way to eff things up, Clarissa. I had planned for a longer interaction between Clarissa and Elijah but I'm not confident in my ability to get him down right just yet. I have to rewatch all the episodes with him in them.

Everyone who wanted some Darissa, here you go! I hope you guys like it. Kind of anxious about it, actually. I had planned this happening in a few chapters, but it just kind of panned out this way.

**Q: ALARIC SOON?**  
In the show, Alaric showed up, like, halfway through November. **If you guys want**, we can have him show up much sooner. Like in the next few chapters. That way he can be forced to have Thanksgivings at the Salvatore boarding house! Bwahahaha!

**Q: Clarissa/doppelgänger/part of the ritual?**  
I said this in the beginning, GUYS NOPE. I PROMISED. There was nobody who looked like Clarissa in the 1800s. Clarissa has nothing to do with breaking the curse or anything. I SWEAR! I have other plans for Clarissa. TERRIBLE plans.

**Q: How is it possible for Clarissa to become a vampire if she revives?/Would becoming a vampire cancel out her ability to revive herself?**  
Well, she still dies. And if she dies with vampire blood in her system, even when she revives, she'd become a vampire. Not to say that it'll go smoothly like for a normal person. I can't say anymore! You guys will just have to sit tight and find out! And you won't believe why/and who turns her! ;D

**Q: Vampire!Clarissa with her humanity switched off?**  
We can have a lot of fun with that for a chapter or two. But the vampire thing won't be happening for a while yet!

**Q: Rebekah/Clarissa friendship?**  
Yes. I'm gonna just say this right off the bat, yes. They're going to be friends. Why? Because Rebekah hasn't lived. And she's crazy and fun. And Clarissa can't die. And Rebekah needs someone to pull pranks with her on her brothers.

**Q: Noah.**  
A lot of you didn't like her and a lot of you did, I'm pretty sure it's about even! Whoo. Noah is important because she needed to show that Clarissa is **not **a good person right now, she also has an important role to play in the upcoming chapters that some of you may be happy about. Not really sure. I also thought it was good to show that I'm not trying to make Elena out to be a bitch. I know a lot of you guys don't like Elena, but she's just trying to be the best sister she can.

**Q: Clarissa needs to have relationships with people other than Damon.**  
Aw, guys. She does! Clarissa has Caroline, Elena, Bonnie, Jeremy, sort of Stefan/Tyler/Matt and she made a few city friends. TRUST me, these relationships are key to molding her. I know there's a lot that focuses on Damon, but that's because it's a Damon/OC fic, and because they (totally like each other) enjoy each others company. You know how it is, always wanting to text/spend time wit your crush ;D. But I make a point to show Clarissa texting Jeremy and Caroline often. Because those relationships and how they feel about her actions MEANS a lot of Clarissa.

**Q: Clarissa is a bad person**.  
Yes. But right now, so is Damon. I wanted to keep him close to how he was in the beginning of season 1. And right now, he IS a very bad influence on Clarissa. He makes her feel like it's okay to be a terrible person. Okay, so she's not exactly a TERRIBLE person but she's very selfish, not seeing past her OWN happiness (and Damon's or Jeremy's or Caroline's, ect). But as her friendships strength, Clarissa is going to be less terrible which in turn will influence Damon. They're still going to be a lot like themselves, only a bit more considerate of the world around them. Alaric especially is going to play an important role for both Damon and Clarissa. He'll be the good guy best friend Damon desperately needs, and a sort of father figure for Clarissa. And believe me, he's not gonna take any of Clarissa's crap. ("You just knocked this stuff down now you have to sit here and clean it. You too, Damon. Lemme grab a beer and watch you fuckers." PFFT kidding. But not really.)

**Q: Clarissa needs to stand up for herself against Damon!**  
No worries, she will. Clarissa isn't one to get herself in a tricky situation with a vampire, even if she does trust Damon. She recognizes how quick Damon can be to throwing a tantrum and unless it's something she feels strongly about, she doesn't mind shrugging it off.

**Q: Updates?**  
Weekly, that's all I can tell you guys! I used to say every Sunday, but lately it's been every Thursday. And holy crap, it's Tuesday. Sat-Monday I don't typically write.

**Q: Clarissa/Lexi?**  
I have a lot of plans for Lexi.

**Q: How much does Clarissa know about the TVD?**  
Bits and pieces here and there. It wasn't a show she watched but her roommated (me) was obsessed with so it was on a lot in the background. Like she knows who the main people are, but she didn't know who Elijah was or that Katherine is. But she might know something crazy random like who Klaus looks like.

So far Anna/Jeremy is winning. Thank you guys so much for your input! Thanks for reading!


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything, not even Clarissa.

Big thank you: BRITt, Vampire I No Drama, JackieOh, RealHuntress18, SomebodyWhoCares, MelissaIsLame, padfootfaerie123, Kitsunekit75, nessafly1 (I LOVE YOUR REVIEW! IT TOOK ME FOREVER TO FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU SAID! Have fun in Mexico!), Randomreader1320, janessa, Moka-girl, ADORATIO, bridgetzombie, kdpierce2, Lucilla Tinwetari, CaribbeanTrinidadian, MrsMusicAddict, Guest, vikki. dillard, The Purple Knight, CallistoAngel, Cara, ThePrettyRecklessRock, Chaos-and-Insanity (I HAVE BEEN DYING TO PLAY THAT GAME!), Sunblaze99, CacklingBlasphemy, Blue.

Two updates in one week, because I love you guys and your reviews seriously motivate me to write! I'm pretty sure I'm going to start watching Supernatural this weekend. Exciting.

* * *

We were about twenty minutes away from Mystic Falls and I found myself falling into a thoughtful silence. There was a lot to consider, to think about, and a lot of it left my head spinning so quickly that I could hardly conceive the possibility of any of it.

First and foremost, I needed to learn everything I could about Katherine and Elijah. That alone was going to be a headache and I had a feeling this was only the beginning. The cute little threat Elijah left me this morning left a lingering fear, but I figured he was very good at inducing that sort of feeling. He had sent room service up to our room, with a card.

_Sorry to have missed out on musical chairs. Perhaps next time? I think you will find I excel in Hide and Seek. XOXO Suits_.

I would be lying if my first, groggy, thought hadn't been '_well played_'. I was sure the 'XOXO' was a jab at the fact I'd blown him a kiss. The faux friendliness oozed with sinister overtones and there was a slight, _slight_, rush of excitement that brimmed just under the fear. At least Elijah would hunt me down with a fucking sense of humor.

Damon had not taken the threat well. He wouldn't let me enjoy the room service as he was too busy throwing it across the room in a fit.

Second, of course, was Damon. After I analyzed everything there was about Elijah from every angle in my mind, going over everything I had said and that he had said, my thoughts strayed toward the vampire next to me. He had gone from a fictional character, to a very much alive vampire that I was certain would kill me, to being the dick who _did_ kill me (because I asked him to), to my blue canary. A natural progression, to be sure. The sexual tension between us was the only problem, but then, I figured I could probably get him to compel me not to feel it anymore, just to make things _easier_. I still couldn't believe I _kissed _him. Talk about zero self-control. It was probably the most cliché thing ever to be said, but in that moment I was sure I'd die if I didn't.

My lips still tingled.

And I could still feel his mouth against my skin, as if he had left imprints trailing down my neck.

However, that wasn't what had my mind in a jumble. _I _was Damon's birdhouse. He even got a tattoo to match mine. It was hard to wrap my thoughts around that, completely, because Damon, while impulsive and very much in the moment, was still an immortal. He was going to have something on him that reminded him of me _forever_. To be honest, I was too afraid to let my mind stray to those thoughts for very long. It didn't make _sense._

Though I guess I couldn't really say that. Nothing made sense anymore, and I wasn't exactly the same person (literally) as I was almost a month ago. It's amazing how _much _can completely change. There was a pull, a bond, between Damon and I that was unexplainable. But then so was being killed and coming back to life. And waking up in a TV show.

Which led me to my next thoughts on Damon—the bizarre connecting via blood. Okay, to be fair, freaking out and thinking I was a Time Lord was more logical than thinking we somehow synched. I (in a sense) regenerated, I _had _two heartbeats, and I kind of time traveled into a different dimension. I drank his blood before (sounds totally gross, I know) and nothing strange happened. Which made me believe that sharing blood (he drinks from me, I drink from him) is needed.

But he seemed totally freaked out and was certain nothing like that ever happened before. So what did that mean? Damon wasn't exactly the type to make _emotional _connections with people. And given he was willing to get a matching tattoo with me, I'd say we have a pretty deep emotional connection. So the weird blood connection _could _just be a vampire thing that activates through a deep bond. And if that was true, then it suggested either A) He never did this with Katherine or B) Katherine wasn't honest about her feelings.

Which of course swung me back to my top priority: Elijah and Katherine.

Judging by Damon's angry reaction and the fact that once he cooled down and still hadn't told me anything, I think it was safe to say that Damon had been blindly in love with Katherine and she _used _that to her advantage. She didn't _tell him anything _which meant… She either had a good reason to keep quiet about her past, being hunted by Elijah possibly? And if that was the case, what could I possibly offer Elijah? He was clearly interested in me because of my appearance. (His comment about me having his complete and undivided attention was now terrifying).

Or maybe it was just Katherine's bloodline he needed.

He had inquired about a sister. I'm sure if all he needed was _me_, he would have easily kidnapped me. So he needs Elena, even if he doesn't (_yet_) realize she exists. Because Elena looks like Katherine, and considering he _asked _if I had a sister… He knew that Katherine's bloodline would one day have an exact copy of her. Right? Maybe there was a girl _before _Katherine. So the fact that Elena looked like Katherine was now considered to be _very significant_. But why? What did it mean? Maybe it was special. Important. A season-worthy plot reason. And what did it mean that Elijah _knew _that Katherine would have a double? Did that mean it was in her bloodline to do that? Was there a supernatural reason behind all this?

The fact that Elijah knew Katherine (possibly hunted Katherine) told me that he was much older than Damon, and according to Damon older vampires were stronger by default. So how old was Katherine? And then, how old is _Elijah_? How far back do vampires even go?

And what was _I_?

Was it possible I was wrong about what Elijah was after? What if he _knew _what I was? (Body snatcher/unable to die). When he had said: _"__It would appear that it was not just I who concealed their true nature"_, I had assumed he was talking about the obvious change in my behavior, switching over to Everett mode. But what if he wasn't?

Which led me back to the blood bond. Was it because whatever I _am_ was the reason the connection happened? Was this a unique experience?

Was it possible that it had only happened because everything was so heightened at that moment?

My head felt like it was going to explode and I was dying to get my hands on computer to begin researching, which would only be the start. There was so many levels of researching, of books, of floating information only spoken through word of mouth—and despite the headache, I was a little excited to tackle a new project.

This all brought me to the third priority that rolled around in my thoughts.

My new life. My new family. My new friends.

_Here _I had a startling and fascinating chance to do whatever I wanted. I knew in my previous life I would never _really_ get out from under my mother. But here? Here I could actually _become _anything I wanted. I could go to college for a career of _my _choosing. I could discover _myself_. From what I gathered from the previous Clarissa and the tearful conversations with Elena, she and I had never been that close despite being twins. And our arguments were legendary (and sometimes resulting in physical fighting when younger).

I planned to remedy that.

I hadn't been lying to Elijah. People (and things) come and go, but family is forever.

Only I had been lucky enough to be given a new family.

Similar to my thoughts from day one, when I assumed I was dreaming, I decided I was going to leave my mark in this world.

The passenger door opened, pulling me from my thoughts. I realized we were in front of my new home and that Damon was leaning lazily against the car, his gaze on me. Nervousness fluttered in the pit of my stomach, which was something new. I never felt nervous about returning home before. Below the nervousness was a twinge of excitement. Elena was going to be _pissed _but that meant she _cared_.

And I never had people who cared.

Well. I never had people who _meant _something to me who cared.

"Yeah, I'm not putting the blame on you." I said, grabbing my bag (and the bag with Stefan's Edward Cullen dildo). "This was all me. Find your own way to get your magical pot."

"Vervain." Damon corrected almost thoughtlessly, like it was becoming second nature to him. I didn't get why he even bothered correcting me. Magical pot sounded cooler. "If you think it's going to bother me that I'm playing the role of _bad guy _again…" he trailed off as I grinned at him, sliding my arm through his.

"Nah. This is family stuff and I kind of wanna own up and explain myself. Bond and shit." I waved it off dismissively. "Don't worry, we'll get Jeremy to go to Zach, being all concerned and asking for vervain."

A look of consideration swept across Damon's expression, the corners of his mouth tilting upward. "I like that plan better." It was official, I was a vampire genius.

But now we were standing on the porch, in front of the door, and I didn't know what to say. Later? Thanks for spending the weekend with me, sorry I kissed you like a hormonal crazed person? Wish me luck? Pound it?

My fist.

Pound my fist.

I better not say that, he might think I'm talking about something else. Or he'd break my fist with his because he's an asshole.

"Clarissa," Damon snapped his fingers in front of my face, and I realized I was staring blankly at his chest. "You attention span is shit right now, so I'll get to the point." Shit, he had been talking? His blue gaze caught mine and held it with the seriousness that radiated back. Surprise flickered through me. "If anything strange happens, you let me know. I mean anything at all. If you notice something in your room or house that you don't think you've seen before, you _immediately _let me know."

Like 'this teddy bear is new, must be a bomb. Better call Damon'? But he was being serious. Very serious. Did Elijah spook him more than he had let on? Or was there something else going on that he wasn't _telling _me about? He stepped closer to me, immediately snapping up my attention again.

"I'm not going to let you out of my sight," he continued quietly, pinning me with _that look_. The one that I wasn't sure what it _meant_.

"I'll be sure to have a pass written up for you at school. Please don't mind Damon, he's gonna tag along everywhere because I attract the attention of homicidal vampires." I deadpanned. "He's drinking from a fellow student? That's okay, that's actually his lunch for today." All the intense seriousness flickered away as amusement gleamed in his gaze.

A sudden, angry, squawk had me jumping and stumbling into Damon's warm chest. I jerked my head around, spotting a large crow perched on the fence that wrapped around the porch, his inky black eyes fixed on me. The crow squawked again.

"I don't have to be physically _here _to watch you."

At least he was telling me. Frowning, I turned to look at Damon. "You take stalking to a whole new level."

"It's not stalking if you know I'm doing it." He shrugged, looking completely unconcerned. "I don't care if you don't like it, the crow is following you." Damon paused, as though hesitating on saying more.

"Mmhm. So this is the _friend _you spent the weekend with." Jenna's annoyed voice cut between us as and I turned, finding her standing in the front door, her arms crossed.

"Uh." I had no idea what to say. "Yes?" She raised her eyebrows in a totally _you're in trouble _kind of way. Oh God.

"Hello, Jenna," Damon purred, smiling charmingly at her.

"How old are you again?" Jenna asked, narrowing her eyes, as I quickly did the math in my head. A hundred and sixty-nine years old. Daaaamn, Damon, you old.

"Twenty-four." Damon's smile turned flirty. "How old are _you_, Jenna? You are looking _ravishing_."

Jenna didn't look impressed, and pointed threateningly at him. "Take your charming, bad boy, looks and get off my porch, Salvatore." She turned her gaze toward me. "You. Inside. Now."

Well at least now I didn't have to worry about an awkward goodbye.

Damon spun me around, defiantly hugging me to his chest rather tightly. My heart jumped, despite myself. "Miss you already, Claryberry." He purred in a low, _suggestive_, voice, a terrible, filthy, smirk stretched across his lips.

My burning face wasn't going to help my case, either, and I had a feeling Damon was throwing me to the wolves. The wolves meaning Elena and now apparently Jenna. Fucking. Dick. Jenna huffed and snatched my wrist, easily pulling me (uncaring as I stumbled) into the house, only to flip my wrist over to see the hummingbird tattoo. My smile turned guilty.

"We have matching tats," Damon crowed and I shot him a look. Jesus Christ, what the _hell _was he doing?! His smirk grew. "Because our love is the _truest_—" Jenna slammed the door in his face.

"What is this?" Jenna demanded, holding my wrist in her hand, her expression _disbelieving_. I stayed quiet, because I'm pretty sure saying something sarcastic would get me in heaps of trouble. "A _tattoo_? You got matching tattoos with a guy you've known, for what? Two weeks? Three weeks? Tattoos are _forever_, Clarissa Sunny Gilbert! I understand how you feel, you think this passion will last forever, but _news flash_, it will _not_!" Passion?!

"YOU GOT A TATTOO?!" Elena's voice was shrill and I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little bit scared. I winced, attempting to shrink back but Jenna held me tight. Elena came flying down the steps like a witch, hair flying, eyes wild.

God in HEAVEN, just kill me now!

Jeremy came out of the kitchen, leaning against the archway, with a bowl of…

WAS THAT POPCORN?!

"Jeremy designed the tattoo and texted it to me." Throwing him under the bus with me, because what the hell, he has popcorn! This was obviously a show to him!

He shrugged as Jenna turned her head toward him and popped a few pieces of popcorn into his mouth. Ugh!

"You both enable each other!" Elena burst out, looking ready to lunge at Jeremy with the dirty look she sent him. It's like Elena watched Dr. Phil and latched onto that word. We're all enablers! "This whole time he's been pinning the blame on Damon, but did _Damon _make you do this?" Elena raised her eyebrows at me, the same way Jenna had. I grinned guiltily back at her.

"Apparently they got _matching _tattoos!" Jenna said as Elena stomped to me, staring down at my tattoo and then lifting her head to stare at me in a state of shock. Damon was dead. So dead. Was he _trying _to make me throw the blame on him?

"Are you kidding me right now, Clare? Matching tattoos? How long have you even _known _Damon?" Elena was just repeating what Jenna already shouted. I had a feeling this was going to be happening a lot.

"Yeah C, he's gonna have that tattoo on him _forever_." Jeremy chortled. Fucker. "Raise your arm, lemme see it!"

"JEREMY!" Jenna and Elena snapped, throwing him looks before glowering at me.

"This. Is. NOT. _FUNNY_!" Elena shouted at Jeremy as Jenna went off on me with: "You're seventeen years old, you can't be rushing off with a guy seven years older than you, getting matching tattoos! How did you even _get _this tattoo? You're not of age! You had no consenting parental guardian!"

"Maybe Damon made a compelling argument." Jeremy offered, far more amused than he should be, considering I was being screamed at by two angry women. "He's good like that."

"I want the name of this tattoo shop, I'm going to give them a piece of my mind!" Jenna continued, throwing her hands about, gesturing wildly as her voice increased in volume. "Tattooing kids underage! That's _illegal_! Is this your way of acting out? You've never been this kind of impulsive! This takes the cake! Is it because you're angry at me? Do you feel like I'm not… Not good enough to…"

"No!" What the hell? "Oh my God, no, Aunt Jenna, you're doing amazing! This isn't about you!" I assured her quickly. Jesus Christ!

"Then what is this?" Elena demanded and I opened my mouth, but she continued on. "Are you—is this about me? Are you angry at me? We can talk about this—I… I made an appointment with Dr. Heymans, we're going to therapy!" Oh good. Jeremy groaned. "Shut up, Jer! You're supporting this! She's being destructive, shouldn't you _care_? Doesn't it bother you that she spent an entire _weekend _alone with a guy she hardly knows?!"

"Jesus Christ, 'Lena!" Jeremy snapped. "Of course I care, but I trust C! She's not being destructive! You're acting like this is the end of the—"

"Is this because I'm dating Stefan?" Elena turned back to me. "I'll break up with him, if it means you'll stop acting out!"

What the fuck?!

Where did that even come from!?

"That's right, make it all about you." Jeremy snipped from the kitchen, throwing a piece of popcorn at her.

"At least I'm trying to figure out why she's behaving this way!" Elena snapped back. "All you do is support her, even if it's wrong and harmful! That is _not _being a good brother!"

"You don't know shit, Elena, you don't know shit! At least I talk to her, listen to her! She hasn't even had the opportunity to tell you why she went! Maybe she just wanted to get away from _you _and your smothering negativity about what everyone else does around you!"

"ENOUGH!" Jenna exploding causing Elena and Jeremy to look at her in surprise. We are such a fucked up family. I wondered if this was normal. "Nobody say a word. Clare," she looked at me. "We're going to be quiet and listen. Tell us what's going on and why you felt it was important to run off with Damon, and what you think—I mean, what you feel Damon _means _to you. You can talk to us, and we can listen and try to understand."

I gaped, staring at the three of them, all three had various expression. I didn't know what to say. I ran off to the city because I missed being _home_, but I couldn't exactly say that, could I? Especially since now I was considering _this _my new home, with my new family. My new, very dysfunctional, family. I needed to be honest—well. As honest as I _could _be. They needed to know this trip to the city wasn't _bad_, it was helpful.

Minus the Elijah part.

Suddenly I felt exhausted, suddenly I felt weary. I knew what I had to tell them.

"I… wanted to kill myself. I, ah… attempted to, over the summer, at the bridge… Tyler found me, stopped me… So that's why he's been all…" It was awkward, and my throat was closing up. Elena sucked in a gasp, swaying. Guilt burned hotly—Christ, I better not get weird and weepy over this. "Uh, I wanted to leave here. I didn't want to be here anymore." I had wanted to go home. "So that's how me and Damon met, because I wanted… Tried to..." Jeremy dropped the bowl, but nobody seemed to notice. Jenna was _crying _and I shifted awkwardly.

"That's?" Jeremy whispered, looking at me with wide, disbelieving, eyes.

I gave a weak grin at his horrified realization. "Yeah. So. Blue canary. Damon kind of _snapped _me out of that… you know, real quick. I didn't go to the city because of you guys, I went because of me. I needed… To just… find myself again. Get a grasp on what's important. This is why I got the tattoo—it's a hummingbird, and… They symbolize looking at the past, but moving on. They also represent resurrection. And… and I'm _okay_. I'm okay now."

Elena crashed into me, hugging me tightly, sobbing. Jeremy was next to us instantly, pulling the both of us into a crushing hug. I clung to the both of them.

I didn't understand how Clarissa Gilbert could fall so deep into her darkness. I wasn't ever going to give up this family. And I would have no problem destroying anyone who threatened them. I wasn't exactly the _hero _type, but that was okay. Heroes had mercy and let the evil doers live.

I would crush Elijah into a thousand different pieces.

* * *

Elena decided to have a girls night, despite it being Monday tomorrow. After she calmed down (she cried for an hour straight and refused to let me leave her arms), she called both Bonnie and Caroline. Both girls excitedly agreed to a sleepover.

"I can't believe you got a tattoo without me!" Caroline scoffed as we were sprawled out on the floor in Elena's room on pillows, in a circle, doing our nails. "You said you'd never get one, like _ever_, and if you did, you and I would go _together_!"

I raised my hands in defense, hoping Caroline wasn't about to smack me with her pillow, because I was pretty sure all the nail polish in front of me would spill over onto the laptop. I had decided to attempt to both paint my nails _and _upload the pictures and videos onto facebook at the same time. I was already newly facebook friends with Nate, Olivia, Jeb, Sammy and Noah (who I was also chatting with through messages).

"I knoooow," Elena agreed, nodding her head, not even looking up from painting Bonnie's nails a pretty blue. "The only person you should be getting a _matching tattoo _with is _me_!"

"Wait. _Matching _tattoo?" Caroline scooted closer, her eyes locked onto me. Oh. God. She looked like a hound dog that just caught whiff of a rabbit. "No way. I can't believe you didn't _tell _me! With _Damon_? You got matching tattoos with Damon? This is _un-_friggin'-_believable_!"

Bonnie snorted. "What's _un-friggin'-believable_," she quoted Caroline's word, using the same high pitched shriek. "Is that _Elena _isn't throwing a fit! Gasp, Clare, how _could _you!" The dark skinned girl mimicked her best friend almost down to a T and I burst into giggles.

Elena finally looked up at us, cheeks tinted with a pink hue. "I do _not _sound like that!" She denied, a smile twitching across her face. "And besides," she straightened. "I, Elena Gilbert, have decided to go with the flow, to not be so uptight, and allow my dear twin sister to make terrible life choices just so I can say _told you so_."

I huffed. "Nonsense. I never regret _anything _I do." It was a code I lived by. I had _just_ decided it was my code, but that didn't matter! It was true, nonetheless. Caroline smacked my arm, _hard_, drawing my attention back to her. Rude, much?

"You're telling me Damon, Mr. Tall, Dark and Dangerous with the bad boy thing going for him, got _that tattoo _on him?" Caroline raised her eyebrows, a wide, shit eating, grin flying across her lips. "He is _whipped_! His bad boy days are _done_, he is _soooo _whipped!"

WHAT!

_NO_!

"Anything for you, Claryberry!" Bonnie shrieked with a laugh and my cheeks flushed. I hoped to _GOD _that Damon wasn't listening in via crow!

"Why aren't you texting me back, Claryberry!" Caroline grinned viciously.

"Look Claryberry, I got the same tattoo as you!" Elena chimed.

"That's not it at all!" I refused, fanning my hot cheeks. "Nope! We're not like that! We're just friends!"

"Guys like _that _don't make female friends." Caroline said smugly. "He's bending over backwards to impress you, like, 24/7, Clare! I bet you he'd leap through hoops of fire while wearing a tutu if he thought it'd amuse you! He. Is. So. Whipped. So whipped." That's not how it was _at all_!

"Mmhmmm," Bonnie bobbed her head. "And it's not like he's being a creep, playing up the charm, and is waiting for you to sleep with him. He knows you're totally Disney, totally true love. You don't even _kiss_."

My cheeks burst into flames as I squeaked, the memory of Damon's mouth on mine flashing across my mind. My fingers flew over my lips which tingled hotly.

"YOU KISSED?!" Elena and Caroline shrieked, Bonnie whacking me with a pillow, causing the nail polish to teeter.

"DETIALS!" Bonnie demanded.

"Oh my GOD! Look at her _face_!" Caroline cried excitedly, her baby blues bright. "You bitch! You were going to withhold this information from me?! When did this happen!?" I buried my burning face into my palms and wilted into my lap, wailing. Caroline began to beat me with her pillow. "Don't you dare deprive me of this! We have the right to know every juicy detail of how it went down!"

"Seriously, Clare! Spill!" Bonnie agreed and I lifted my head, snatching the pillow from Caroline and staring at the three of them. They scooted closer, eagerly staring back.

"Okay! Okay! I kissed him. We were in the elevator, playing musical chairs…"

"Oh my God, he is so perfect for you!" Caroline threw her hands up in the air. "What the hell? You find a total freakin' hottie like Damon, who is a total bad boy, you do what every girl dreams of doing, snagging said bad boy and turning him into a love sick puppy! You asexual, true love, freak! Un_fair_!"

On second thought, I hoped Damon was listening.

Pay back for throwing me to the wolves, fucker.

"You kissed _him_?" Elena repeated, completely ignoring what Caroline said, her mouth falling open. "But… True loves first kiss! Clare—?"

"No!" I laughed. "No, not at _all_! I don't even have a crush on him."

"You gave up your first kiss and you don't even _like _him?" Bonnie raised her eyebrows, disbelief on her face. "You're so… So passionate about that, I don't see you changing those ideals, not even for a smokin' hot Salvatore."

"Who cares how you _feel _about him!" Caroline scoffed. "Tell me how the kiss was! Was it sweet? I always pictured you having your first kiss like under fireworks at Disney, but I guess an elevator is close enough."

Why was she picturing my first kiss at _all_?!

"They might've had fireworks in the elevator." Elena pointed out with an amused grin. "I think Damon's irresponsible enough to go with it if Clare decided to set some off in an enclosed space."

I brightened at the idea. That would be _so much fun_.

"Oh my God, Elena, you're giving her ideas!" Bonnie mock scolded. "But go on, Clare."

I sighed as their gazes became expectant once more.

"It wasn't sweet, or cute, or anything Disney related. It was more like rated R." I admitted, causing my twin and two friends to drop their jaws in shock. "Like if it were a movie it'd be called: Clare and Damon Attempt To Make A Porno In An Elevator."

"_Really_?" Bonnie. Disbelief.

"No!" Elena. Shock.

"Oh my _God_!" Caroline. Approving smirk.

"Yes. I… grabbed him and kissed him and sucked on his tongue." I flushed hotly. "I know! I can't believe I did that!"

"Where did you learn to kiss like _that_?!" Elena demanded, her protective streak coming out.

"Fanfictions." Caroline supplied with a flat look. Hell yeah! I grinned at her. "Probably between Kevin and Double D." She knew what I shipped! But then, I guess she _would_.

"Damn girl, maybe I should start reading those." Bonnie frowned. "That is some serious kissing."

"Rated R, though? More like _PG-13_." Caroline said with a huff. "I mean, all you did was _kiss_."

"Yeah but the way he _grabbed _me, and the way his hands were in my hair, and the way he had me pinned against the wall… It was _wild_, and it was completely out of control…" I murmured, every inch of me brimming with the memory. "And the way he _looked _at me, like he could devour me, like he could eat me alive…"

"I bet he wanted to _eat you_." Caroline sniggered earning a pillow being thrown at her face from Elena. _Thank you_.

"And his _voice_, the way he spoke to me... There was _only _him, nothing else in the world mattered, and every inch of me would die if I didn't kiss him. That's how it felt. It was almost _painful_, it was beyond my control. And when his skin touches mine, it's _rapturous_. Everything lights up…" I trailed off awkwardly when I realized they were gaping at me. My cheeks warmed. God, this was so embarrassing.

And at the same time, it was nice to vent this out to them. At least I had someone to friggin' talk to. I felt like I was gonna explode.

Bonnie and Caroline glanced at each other and then back to me. I flushed hotly. _Whaaat_?

"A shooting star fell down to Eaaarth. Lightning craaacked the skkkkyyyy!" Bonnie burst out, grabbing the hair brush like it was a microphone. I stared at her. "Something weird is haaaappening! Something I caaaaan't deeeeny!"

Was she seriously singing?

I was in the middle of talking about my embarrassing melt down where I _attacked _Damon's mouth with mine and she was ignoring me to sing?!

"A straaaange kind of maaaagic…" Caroline picked up, grinning wickedly. "Ruuuuuunning through my braaaain! FEEEEEL I'M IN HEAAAAVEN! Or going insane!"

This was _rude_! Is this how people felt when I broke out into singing?! I was telling a friggin' story here!

She and Bonnie bounced upward and burst into shrill singing: "'CAUSE EVERYTIME WE TOUCH I GET THIS FEEEELIIING! AND EVERYTIME WE KISS I SWEAR I COULD FLLLLY!"

"OH MY GOD SHUT UP!" I shrieked, throwing my pillow at Bonnie, causing her to crash into Caroline. The two tumbled to the ground laughing as my cheeks burned. "I JUST SAID IT WASN'T LIKE THAT!"

Elena gave me a _knowing _look but I don't know what the hell she thinks she's _knowing _because there wasn't anything to know! At. All. "Okay, Clare." WHAT THE HELL DID THAT MEAN?

"I'm serious guys! I punched Damon with my mouth! It was pure, animalistic, _lust_! Fuck I want him so bad I'm going to _die_, but I definitely do not, even a little bit, like him! I wish I did, because at least then I could justify my freakin' actions!" I wailed, tilting over and leaning into Elena. "My life is over." She patted my head.

"What's the problem then?" Caroline asked after catching her breath from laughing. "He's there. He totally wants you. Do it."

"No way." Bonnie shook her head. "I get the hotness factor, but don't give in just because you've got the hots for him! Your Disney stuff is important to you!"

"Bon, like, firstly, Damon is off the charts on the sexiness, so the chances of Clare ever finding a guy like Damon that she's _actually _attracted to and wants her just as crazy bad is like slim to none." Caroline huffed. "Secondly, be young. Enjoy your friggin' life."

"Worst advice ever!" Elena laughed. "Don't listen to her. Stay true to who you are. And if you _want _to have sex with Damon, do it for the right reasons. Being that they're _your _reasons. And not because he's a 'total hottie'. Nobody would judge you, seriously. And you don't have to stick to your Disney stuff because you feel like you _have _to."

"No… I already told him we cannot, ever, kiss again." I groaned, sitting up. "Because I won't be able to separate feels from the sexual stuff if it actually happened. And I kissed him right after he sexed up Noah."

"Ew." Caroline winkled her nose. "Excuse me? He had sex with some bitch when he was supposed to be hanging out with _you_?"

"What a dick." Bonnie agreed. "Jeez."

"Aw, Noah isn't so bad." I said halfheartedly. "And it's _Damon_. That's his _thing_."

"You gave him your precious first kiss after he was done screwing someone else?!" Elena scoffed. "He didn't deserve that kiss!"

"I said it was out of my control!" I huffed, spinning my laptop around. "This is Noah."

Elena, Caroline and Bonnie leaned in.

"She's not even pretty!" Caroline snatched my laptop, her and Bonnie going through the pictures on her facebook. Even though I knew for a fact that Noah was very pretty, and I wanted to be friends with her, I still felt a strange vicious delight in Caroline's catty behavior. "Oh my God, she's a goth! Damon screwed a _gothic chick_? He couldn't at least get someone _hot_?"

"Men don't care where they put their dicks." Bonnie hummed. "You are way prettier than her, though."

"Aw guys, don't be mean." Elena scolded lightly. "She's obviously Clare's friend."

"The hell?" Bonnie squinted her eyes. "I miss you so much, Clare? I'm sorry I couldn't resist temptation's sin and slept with Damon? Do you forgive me, Clare? When will I see you again?"

"Holy shit, she likes _you_!" Caroline snorted with laughter and I frowned. What made Caroline think _that_?

"No, she's just very affectionate." I explained. "That's just Noah's way."

"Uh-huh."

"Nate just liked a video you uploaded." Bonnie announced and I brightened.

"Oh my God, go to it!" I pushed Elena, moving her closer to the laptop and they hovered around it. "You _have _to see!"

"_Say hi Damon!_" I heard myself say from the video and the three of them outright burst into hysterics.

"Are you kidding me?!" Elena shrieked with laughter.

"He was actually stripping?!" Caroline cried. "I can't believe this!"

"Oh my God, they're _dancing_!" Bonnie grinned widely. "This is _priceless_."

"I told you he was whipped!"

"He's not whipped!" I flatly refused. "He just knows how to have a good time."

Caroline raised her eyebrows and looked over to me, a smirk on her face. "Have you ever asked him to do something and he said 'no' to you?" She asked and I opened my mouth. "Said _no _and didn't give in a little while later?"

"Of course." I was sure of it. As hard as it was to imagine _anyone _denying me things, I was certain Damon was the exception to that rule. I mean, it's _Damon_. He didn't give into the pouty face.

* * *

Elena and Clare's hyena like cackles reached all the way to Jeremy's room. Usually Jeremy had his headphones on, but for tonight he preferred the sound of his sisters' laughter. Even if it was shrill and obnoxious and mixed in with their friends'. Lazily, his fingertips flew across the sleek black keys on the keyboard that was settled on his lap, his mind half on the forum he was on, and half on other pressing matters. He might've not liked Damon much, but his words from Friday night carried over. He needed to get his shit together, because it _wasn't _just him. He had Clare and Elena and they clearly needed him too. He knew he was going to have to make a better effort with Elena. Where he and Clare always seemed to just click, he and Elena always seemed to clash. _Twins_.

But he never put in any effort to change that. If he and Elena tried to understand each other _ a little bit _better, Jeremy was certain they could have a smoother relationship. And it wasn't just for Clare's sake. It was for his too. Their parents death had driven them further apart when it should have brought them together, but Clare's… confession… It was the kick in the ass that he needed. No more drugs. Though… that meant no more _Vicki_, didn't it? He knew he deserved better than to be the go-to guy when she was feeling hurt about Tyler or needed a quick fix, but that didn't stop him from feeling the way he did.

Though if he were honest with himself completely, being close to Clare, and hanging out with Elena and talking to Jenna more made him feel less… dependent on Vicki.

A soft _beep _sounded, a flash of red light, and Jeremy paused in his typing. "Hello, Damon," he greeted, smothering a smug smirk as he slowly swirled his computer chair around, wishing he had one of those overly fluffy white cats in his lap. Damon looked taken by surprise for a moment, standing awkwardly in Jeremy's darkened bedroom. "I knew it was only a matter of time before you'd come in here, confessing your attraction to me."

The vampire's slight surprise faded and he rolled his eyes, throwing himself down on Jeremy's bed as though it were his own. "How'd you know I was here?" Damon drawled, as though bored, plucking up the TV remote. Like it was Jeremy's job to personally see him fully entertained.

"I have sensors attached to my window that alerts me when—" Jeremy began but Damon flicked his wrist, looking disinterested. _Prick_.

"You Gilberts and your vampire inventions." Damon sighed theatrically, and Jeremy decided to refrain from telling him he didn't invent _anything_. If Damon wanted to think Jeremy was smarter than he actually was, who was he to rebuff that?

"So…" Jeremy prompted after a moment. "Did you come here to play video games or…?"

Damon was on his feet faster than Jeremy could register his movement, though the youngest Gilbert sat back in his computer chair calmly, watching as the vampire paced a bit. Much like a pent up tiger. After a moment passed, Damon's blue eyes flickered upward to meet Jeremy's expectant, yet curious, gaze. But Damon merely stayed silent so Jeremy slid off his computer chair.

"Look, it's easier for two dudes to talk when there's video games involved."

Maybe Jeremy should have found it odd that he was now playing Call of Duty with a vampire (who would have no remorse about killing him in real life), but the easy silence between them wasn't uncomfortable or strange. Damon had picked up on the controls incredibly quickly and went from royally sucking to being better than Jeremy. When Jeremy commented on it, Damon merely said he was adaptable.

"Does this have to do with C?" Jeremy asked after being knifed in game.

"You know those blue canary nightlights all over your house?" Damon questioned and Jeremy nodded his head. "I didn't put them there and they started showing up in the hotel in New York."

Jeremy's grip on his controller tightened. "What does that mean?" His voice lowered, as though he didn't want to be overheard. Which was ridiculous. "Who is…?" He glanced at the vampire, hardly surprised to see the irritation on Damon's face. He might've not liked the guy, but he knew, for whatever reason, Damon took the role of _blue canary_ seriously.

Go figure.

"I'm working on figuring that out." Damon growled after a moment, which unnerved Jeremy a little. So they were completely in the dark about this? Great. In the dark about nightlights. What a _joke_. "I told Clary to tell me if she notices anything strange going on around her…"

Jeremy understood immediately. "I'll keep you in the loop if anything is up." Clare, when focused, could be brilliant at times. But typically she was completely oblivious to the world around her. "And if I see any nightlights anywhere else."

Damon seemed to visibly relax a little and they fell into another round of silence.

"There's one more thing I need you to do." Damon tossed the controller to the side, apparently losing complete interest in the game. "I need you to get Zach, my _nephew_, to show you where the vervain is in the boarding house. Vervain is a plant that is, for lack of a better word, vampire kryptonite. It can keep whoever wears it, or ingests it, from being compelled. Go to him, tell him you're scared shitless for Clary, do whatever you have to do to find out where it is."

"Okay, but I'm going to take some for us." Jeremy agreed, nodding his head as he turned the game off. "No offense."

"I'm certain Stefan already gave some to Elena, hence the necklace." Damon wasn't refusing him, which Jeremy was actually surprised about. He turned around, but found himself alone in the room. The sensors he had installed into his window were also now laying across his bed. _Asshole_.

* * *

"Just talk to him." Bonnie suggested helpfully and Elena sighed, raking her fingers through her hair.

"That's the _problem_." Elena replied a little moodily. "I try and I get walls. I get more questions. I don't even know what his favorite color is, how's that for pathetic? I don't _know _anything real about Stefan! Nothing!"

"Tell him he has one more chance to start spilling or you're done." Caroline said after a moment as I continued to braid her hair. "As much as it's fun to make out and be with a hottie, you can't have something based on nothing."

"Mmhm," Bonnie agreed. "If he's serious about you, he'll buck up and tell you about himself. Mysterious is only sexy for so long until it gets old."

"Seriously, it's almost been a month. Have him take you out on a date and just have _him _talk." I offered. Jesus, Stefan, what the hell are you doing? "Twist his nipples until he gives in."

Elena snorted. "I'm not going to do that."

"You should." Caroline agreed with me. "You should have _all _the power."

"Yep."

Caroline and I bumped our knuckles together.

Morning came all too quickly and someone had their damn cellphone hooked up with an alarm that shrieked at us angrily. I groaned miserably, throwing Elena's arm off from on top of my face as I wiggled out of the stray limbs and bed sheet which somehow twisted around my legs in the middle of the night.

"Claaaare." Bonnie whined groggily as I slumped onto the floor. "Turn. That. Off."

"'S'mine." I heard Caroline's muffled voice from somewhere in the bed as I stumbled over to the cellphones sitting on top of my vanity dresser.

We had moved into my room, since my bed was bigger and would fit the four of us much more comfortably. I didn't have a sledgehammer so I settled with angrily turning her alarm off by stabbing her phone with my fingers until the noise stopped.

"It's like an hour before we even have to get up." I moaned, trying to blink the sleep from my eyes as I squinted down at her blurry phone. Caroline was easily climbing over Bonnie and Elena, looking completely awake. _Why_.

"I have to shower and do my makeup and look _fabulous_," my blonde bestie announced in a chipper voice. It assaulted my half-awake mind like bullets. "Unlike you three slackers, I actually take time with my appearance. It's why I'm always _stunning_."

"I don't need to because I'm naturally stunning." I huffed, but Caroline merely skipped into the bathroom and slammed the door shut. I blearily stared at the door. "I call dibs on the shower next."

After showering, and getting my hair halfway decent, I threw on a black shirt with a pink smiley face on the front and a pair of jeans. A Nyan Cat hoodie in the back caught my eye and I decided to slip that on too. It went well with the glitter bracelets.

"I need a boyfriend." Caroline said, turning away from the vanity after applying another layer of lip gloss as I pocketed my phone. "Or a boy toy."

"Boy toy." I nodded as we met a sleepy looking Bonnie and smiling Elena out in the hall. "Who wants drama and commitment?"

"I do." Bonnie yawned, rubbing an eye. "I want all of the drama and commitment."

"Clare's right," Caroline said firmly. "Look at her and Elena, they have hot boys but they're being _so _dramatic about it. I just want to make out and roll around." I threw the blonde next to me a look but she shrugged her shoulders innocently. I was not being dramatic!

"Thanks, Care." Elena rolled her eyes playfully, sending me a small grin, as we made our way into the kitchen where Jenna was with what looked like homework out in front of her.

My phone buzzed in my pocket, and I pulled it out to find a _good morning_ text from Noah. Aw. I texted her back, and then decided to text Olivia to see what kind of day she had planned out. Gotta keep in the loop with my city buddies.

"Aunt Jenna has a daaaaate!" Elena shoved a box of cereal into my arms, drawing my attention back, as she pranced toward the fridge dramatically, swaying her hips. "Oooh, going out with _Looogan_!"

"Dets!" Caroline demanded as Jenna groaned, a small smile twitching upward on her face.

"Logan? As in Logan _Fell_?" Bonnie asked, looking more awake, and I frowned. Waaaait, what? When did _this _happen?

"I thought we were calling him _Scum Fell_?" Why was I out of the loop?

"Oh that's right!" Elena pulled out the milk, closing the fridge door with her hip. "They met up at the Founder's. Their love, _rekindled_!"

"Nothing is _rekindled_!" Jenna scoffed, twirling the pen between her fingers. But there was a tiny grin on her face anyway. "I'm going to show up and _torture _him."

"Mmhm. Denial." Caroline dismissed. "So much denial. You've agreed to show up which means you _want _to see him."

"Just be careful. Don't let him back in so easily." I pulled my phone back out as it buzzed. "Make the bastard work for it. He has to treat you like a queen for a while before you'll _consider _giving him a proper chance."

"Planning on it." Jenna grinned widely, flashing me a thumbs up, just as Jeremy came into the kitchen.

"Hey, can I hitch a ride to school with you guys?"

I squealed excitedly and bounced into him, causing Jeremy to nearly lose his balance.

* * *

I trailed behind Caroline as she chatted to a girl (who I was pretty sure was named Kate) about a fundraiser she was overseeing tomorrow. Sexy something or other car wash and bikinis. I wasn't really listening as I was texting Noah and Olivia, both of who seemed to have all the time in the world to text back. It was nearly October, so I wasn't sure a car wash was a good idea, but whatever. I guess supernatural towns can do whatever they want.

_THAWK_!

"FORGET MY LIFE!" I shrieked, hitting the ground pretty hard, dizzy as hell as my face (mostly my nose) exploded with pain. "IT'S LIKE THE WHOLE WORLD LIKE TO BEND ME OVER AND FIND ME IN THE ALPS!"

Oh my _GOD_, was it my destiny to always land hard on my ass?! Moaning in pain, I placed a hand over my throbbing face. I hoped to God I didn't just break my freakin' nose. Why was this always happening to me?! Tears sprang to my eyes, this hurt like hell!

"Oh my God, Clare!" Caroline cried, distressed, instantly swooping down next to me. "Oh my God, oh my God! Are you okay?"

I got hit in the face.

AGAIN!

By a _door_.

So no! I wasn't okay!

"Shit! Shit, I'm so sorry, I didn't even—are you alright?" A deep, extremely apologetic (and maybe even a little frantic) male voice asked hurriedly, a hint of a New England accent bleeding through.

"You douchebag!" Caroline growled from above me. "What the hell? You could have broken her nose! Sit tight, okay? I'm getting the nurse!"

Still clutching my throbbing my face, I waved a dismissive hand. Thanks Caroline. Way to leave me here!

"Hey…" the male voice said softly, a lot closer to me suddenly. Warm fingers were peeling back my hand from my face and I squinted my eyes in pain at a decent looking guy crouched down in front of me, with genuine concern on his face. "I'm just going to check that it's…" his blue eyes met mine and he froze, his hand tightening for a moment on my mine.

I blinked back the tears, feeling alarmed as he recoiled. "Oh God, is my face broken?" I asked, my hand flying back to my face as dramatically as I could, because in his shocked gaze was horrified, full blown, _recognition_. I nearly jumped in surprise to feel something wet on my face—I pulled back my hand.

Fuck.

My.

Life.

I was _bleeding_!

I froze as a horrible realization swept over me.

I was bleeding and this guy _recognized _me.

God help me.

First Elijah and now this guy?

And I was _bleeding_. In front of him. Was he a vampire? A new sense of panic brimmed as my mind swirled through the confusion and pain. Unlike the prim and composed Elijah, who radiated dangerous power, this guy had an air of relaxed friendliness that my gut told me wasn't false. Or maybe I was too disoriented and a shit ton in pain to be able to see through the façade.

What if it hadn't been an accident? What if he had meant to draw blood, what if he was going to take it—to make sure I was a part of Katherine's bloodline, or maybe they just needed her blood for something dark and _twisted_? And why was he looking at me like that? The horror was quickly turning to startled, confused, _disbelief_…?

I stared back at him. Should I make a run for it? Did he work with or for Elijah? And if he did, wouldn't he have been more prepared to have bumped into me instead of staring at me with wide eyes? _He looked so sad_.

"_Clare_?!" Elena's shrill voice cut in and I panicked. Oh God! If this guy was sent by Elijah and he saw her—he would know! Elijah would know about Katherine's double! "Oh my _GOD_! What happened, are you okay?"

My gaze was locked onto the guy as Elena bent down next to me, and confusion bloomed across my chest. There was not an ounce of recognition in his gaze. If he had such a strong reaction to me, shouldn't he be reeling at the sight of Elena? She was basically Katherine! He recovered quickly.

"Uh, yeah, hi. My fault." The guy said with a small, awkward, tilt to his lips. "I kind of opened the door too hard and fast…"

"Were you texting?" Elena sighed, spotting my phone and picking it up. I frowned at her, why was she always so quick to blame all my injuries on _me_? She smiled apologetically toward the possible threat. "I'm sorry about my sister, when she gets focused on something the whole world disappears around her. This is not _your_ fault." She assured him kindly. _What_!

"I just got hit in the face with a door, this isn't _my_ fault!" I cried. "I'm _bleeding_! Feel _bad_ for me, don't _blame_ me!"

"You two are sisters?" Possible Threat, or PT, asked with forced disinterest, his gaze sliding between us.

"Twins, actually." I heard Bonnie's voice from somewhere behind me and I found myself feeling even more confused at the look of relief that flickered in PT's gaze. "You okay, Clare?" How could she ask me that?!

"No, my face is broken!"

"You don't look like her…" PT murmured, as if he were talking out loud to himself and hadn't meant to be heard. And he was looking at _Elena. _

Elena didn't look like _who_? Me? Because we _shared_ similarities!

What the hell is this?

If he didn't recognize me for Katherine…

_The resemblance is only slight, and you… look like someone else, kind of, _Damon's words from Saturday came swirling back to my thoughts. That's right. I also resembled a woman he met a few years ago.

That this guy knew, maybe?

What the hell?

Damon was now bumped down to third priority on my list of thoughts, this new development coming in right after Elijah and Katherine. I released a puff of air, relaxing slowly. PT gave me no reason to feel uneasy around him. There was something very likeable about him. I think it was the calm ease he radiated.

The bell rang loudly overhead, echoing through the hall.

"Um, I'm gonna head to class…" I heard Bonnie say, sounding conflicted. "Will you be okay?"

"Mhm, yeah. Go on." Elena smiled up at Bonnie, waving her off, as she turned her head toward PT. "You don't have to stay, either. This kind of stuff happens to her all the time, it's alright." Way to make me sound like a klutz! I wasn't!

"Ah, well… I feel responsible." PT said with a faint smile, slanting a shoulder upward. "To be honest I wasn't really paying attention either. I'm Alaric Saltzman, by the way."

That name sounded familiar. I narrowed my eyes in thought, trying to pinpoint where I'd heard it from. _Alaric_. I was pretty sure my roommate talked about him often. Did I just bump into a new main character to this Vampire Diaries cast?

"I'm Elena Gilbert, and this is my sister Clarissa."

I wiggled my fingers in greeting with my free hand.

"There he is!" I heard Caroline huff in the distance. "Hey, you! If her nose is broken, you better pay for the damages!" Good old Caroline. I was pretty sure my nose wasn't broken, given I could talk normally. But God did it freakin' hurt.

"Get to class, Caroline. You too, Elena." Another voice said sternly, heels clicking loudly against the floor. "Your aunt has been called, she's on her way to take you to the hospital. You can wait for her in my office, Clare." I didn't need to go to the hospital!

Elena turned her brown eyes to me, her hand comfortingly on my shoulder as a tall red head came into view, who I was assuming was the nurse. "Are you going to be alright?" She bit down on her lower lip, as though unsure whether or not to actually leave me.

"Yup. As long as I don't run into any vampires, I'll be peachy." I intoned sarcastically, half serious. Like I swear to God if Stefan smells blood and lunges at me, I will be really freakin' pissed. Elena rolled her eyes and left my side.

"Here, let me help you up." Alaric was standing now, offering his hands. "Keep your head tilted back." Shouldn't the nurse be telling me this crap? I grasped his hands, doing as I was told.

A wave of dizziness crashed into me as I stood and I swayed, feeling woozy. Alaric was quick to grasp my shoulders, steading me, his brow furrowing with concern, his gaze guilty. Poor guy. He helped me walk all the way to the nurses' and I was surprised when he leaned against the window next to the cot I was sitting on, a wad of tissues stuffed against my still throbbing nose. There was a the familiar twinge of sleepiness that clung to me, the one that accompanied my body healing itself.

"I, uh… I have some Advil, if you want it." Alaric said quietly, his gaze flickering toward the red head who was some feet away.

"Do you always carry around pain killers?" I wondered and he gave a short, awkward, chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck.

"I'm, uh… I'm actually kind of hungover." He admitted after a moment, ducking his head with an almost boyish embarrassment. Amusement sprang hotly and I burst into laughter only to hiss as my face angrily protested.

"Clare!"

Jenna came bursting into the room looking flustered, her cheeks pink, as if she had ran through the halls. Alaric immediately straightened as she came rushing to me.

"Oh my God, what did you _do_?" Jenna cried, looking stressed out, pulling away the wad of tissues to examine my face. _Me_? "Did Jeremy get himself into another fight? You can't keep jumping in, Clare! You're going to get yourself seriously hurt!"

"Hi," Alaric stepped forward, shifting awkwardly, as he raised a his hand slightly, an attractive, embarrassed, grin sliding across his guilty face. Jenna turned her attention to him, as if she hadn't realized he was standing there before. "I'm the guy who smacked your niece in the face with a door." Pfft!

I watched as Jenna _openly _checked him out and lightly kicked her. "Alaric, this is my Aunt Jenna, Jenna this is some guy who wanders aimlessly around high schools, flinging doors open." Alaric's mouth twitched upward, but his friendly gaze was locked onto Jenna.

"She was texting." Alaric threw me under the bus with a playful grin, rolling his shoulders and placing all the blame back to me.

"Thanks. You just shattered the thin ice I was on." Way to go. Jenna placed her hands on her hips, raising her eyebrows at me _in that way_. She tilted her chin, but her gaze flickered toward Alaric.

"You look a little old to be a high school student." Jenna quirked an eyebrow upward, her expression becoming expectant. Alaric laughed warmly.

"Don't worry, I have a good reason to be here." He assured her, a wide, friendly, grin flickering across his face. I'm pretty sure Jenna was about ready to swoon. "I just had an interview to be the replacement History teacher, though considering…" his gaze tilted in my direction. "I'm not sure they're going to want to hire me anymore."

My phone buzzed, and I brightened when I saw it was Damon. _Stop jumping in front of fists_.

What the…?

How'd he _know _I was hurt?

I glanced toward the window, spotting a crow right outside staring back at me. Really, Damon? Grinning, I texted back: _Ran into a door actually._ Why did everyone assume I jumped into someone's fight? It happened like _one _time!

…That I know of!

Damon: _lolololol idiot_

Rude.

Half listening to Jenna and Alaric flirt with each other (not even kidding), I continued to text Damon. His texts were odd, rushed, and took a bit longer than usual. It spiked my curiosity enough to ask what he was up to.

Damon: _driving to georgia _

What the hell was in Georgia? I guess when you're a vampire, driving like ten hours to another state is just no big friggin' deal. Like did he get up this morning and decide, 'fuck it, time to drive to Georgia'?

Me: _Don't text and drive, D!_

Damon: _oops_

Jenna pulled my phone from my hand and I looked up, curiously. "I asked: Do you want to go to the hospital?"

"Nope." There was no point. If anything was damaged, it was healing itself. Concern inched its way across Alaric's face.

"Are you sure? I hit you pretty hard. Getting an x-ray wouldn't hurt."

I bounced off the cot as Jenna sighed. "She's a pretty tough kid, she bounces back fairly quickly." Jenna turned to look at me. "But if the swelling doesn't go down in a few days, I'm making you go see a doctor." I merely grinned.

"So are you hired or what?" I asked curiously, looking back to Alaric. "'Cause my first period is history. We could walk in together and you can start your reign of terror by declaring you just beat me up."

Alaric furrowed his brow. "Walk in together? Oh no, I'd be dragging you. It has to look real." Surprise quickly fell into amusement, Alaric was winning so many points right now. He actually _went _with it. "But, uh… Assuming all goes well, I'll have my answer within the week and I guess I'd be starting sometime in October."

I nodded. He better get the job, Alaric would probably be the coolest teacher I'd ever had, especially since he had no problem with my sense of humor and had no qualms with dishes it right back. I was fairly certain he was, being that I was sure he was an important character, and all.

"Neat. 'Kay. See you at home, Jenna! Bye, _Ricky_-_Mickey_!" I threw the wad of bloodied tissues into the garbage, Alaric's eyebrows sprang upward at his temporary nickname. "I guess maybe I could call you Laricochet."

"_Clare_." Jenna stressed and I grinned cheekily.

"Byeeee. Look forward to seeing you in class!" I grinned, skipping toward the exit.

"Bye _Missy-Rissy_, sorry I hit you in the face with a door." Alaric called after me, amusement lacing his tone and I flashed him a grin (and shot Jenna a suggestive eyebrow wiggle I picked up from Caroline) before prancing out the hall.

_Rissy_? That was a new one, too.

Alaric had caused me physical damage _and _gave me a nickname (it counted, despite it being a playful teasing thing) which meant… Was Alaric going to become important _to me_? He met the requirements I seemed to have, if Damon was anything to go by. Hopefully this meant Alaric wasn't going to kill me. I couldn't imagine _actually _being friends with him, though. He was like thirty.

…But Damon was like a hundred.

Only time would tell and I had way more important things to be thinking about. I skipped toward the bathrooms. First I had to clean off my face from any dried blood and then I figured I'd hang around until the end of first period. Especially since I didn't get a note from the nurse. But mostly because I wanted to call Damon and see if I could get him to tell me what he was going to Georgia for.

"Clare?"

I nearly tripped and fell on my damned face at the sound of Stefan's voice. I spun around mid-skip, my platform converse squeaking loudly on the floor, and flailed as I nearly lost my balance. Stefan's green eyes locked onto the dried blood on my face. Oh jeez. Here it comes.

"What happened? Are you okay?" Stefan's expression crinkled with concern and he approached me slowly instead of lunging at me and tearing my throat open like I knew he wanted to.

"I guess I have to come clean." I said as solemnly as I could. I took a deep breath, pretending to look conflicted. "Stefan… I'm a vampire. I just fed on a lot of people, there is a pile of corpses. I'm a destructive eating machine of pure evil."

He _rolled _his eyes at me! _Stefan_! Rude!

"I have a secret of my own." Stefan said in a quiet voice. "I'm a vampire hunter." Oh snap! He fixed me with a pointed look and my lips twitched upward.

"I walked into a door." I decided to let him in the loop since he was actually being cool for once. Stefan didn't say anything, but the amusement was loud on his face. Thanks, jerk. "Come into the bathroom with me, I have to talk to you anyway."

Awkwardness crept across his face as I grabbed his hand, pulling him toward the girl's bathroom. "Um, I should really get to class, actually…"

"The period is like half way over, you might as well skip the rest." It's not like he even gave a crap about school, anyway.

"I really don't think it's a good idea for me to go into the _girl's _restroom, Clare." Stefan wasn't really putting up any resistance despite his uneasy tone and I stopped, looking around.

"Did you hear that?" I asked, furrowing my brow as if I were confused. Stefan's lips tugged into a frown. "That's the sound of nobody caring." I swung open the door to the bathroom and pulled reluctant Stefan in with me. He's a friggin' vampire. Hanging out in the ladies room shouldn't be a big deal!

"Why didn't you answer any of my calls?" He asked softly as the door fell shut behind him. He leaned against it as I pranced to the sink, grimacing at the sight of the dried blood all over my nose and chin. "Or Elena's? She was really worried."

I looked horrible.

"Elena and I have sorted things out." I said dismissively, turning on the water and rubbing the dried blood from my skin carefully.

"You shouldn't do that to her, Clare." Stefan continued quietly. "Your parents death… She needs you more than she lets on." I glanced at his reflection, his green eyes meeting mine.

"I don't think you should get into this with me, Steffy," I said lightly. "Because when it comes to problems with siblings, you and Damon take the cake. So instead of focusing on what Elena and I should and shouldn't do, maybe you should take a good hard look at yourself."

"Whatever it is you think you know about Damon… Look, Clare, I know that you two have this… friendship going on, but Damon…" Stefan hesitated. "And as much as I think you could have a good influence on him, I don't think you should… run off with him like that. He's not a good person. I don't want to see you hurt."

"Hey you know when you were ten and Damon took you out for a drink and you got really drunk and ended up breaking a vase? And Damon took the blame for you?" I threw back, half annoyed, as I carefully and slowly inched my fingers up the bridge of my nose (which hurt so fucking bad), checking to make sure nothing _felt _broken. "And your father got pissed? And saw Damon in a bad light, thought that he was a _bad person_? That's how it is. Don't be so black and white, Steffy, and don't parent me. I'm a big girl."

"Mmm, because taking the blame for breaking something and killing someone is on the same level." Stefan said casually, startling me.

He was the one who was supposed to be startled, but he didn't even seemed thrown that I knew that! I turned my head to look at him, finding Stefan's green eyes locked on me, a _smirk _on his lips. And there was something on his face—was that… was that _triumph_? My mouth fell open, did—he _knew_! He knew that I knew that he was a vampire? Since _when_? He's been _playing _me?

I am sick of these damn vampires and their mind games! Stefan and Elijah were assholes! "You knew that I knew? When did you know? How?"

His green eyes danced with amusement, his smirk growing into a teasing grin. "For a while," he said vaguely. "You two were _reaaaally _obvious about it."

What the _hell_?

I stared at Stefan in a state of bewildered anger.

"You could help him, Clare, you can do what I can't. You can help Damon become a better person."

Oh _goddamn _it. Way to ruin things, Stefan. This is why we can't have nice conversations.

"Or you could grow the fuck up and accept the way your brother is." I suggested cheerfully, turning back to the mirror, continuing to examine my nose. "He's not a bad person just because you don't agree with what he does."

"He kills _innocent _people." Stefan nearly snapped.

"I know." I murmured gently. "But you were far more worse and there is always the lingering possibility that the blood gets to you. I'm trusting you with my _sister_. Speaking of," I sighed, turning off the water. I looked presentable and my nose seemed okay. "If you don't get your ass in gear, she's going to dump you. You need to open up to her. I'm not saying telling her you're a vampire, _yet_, but if you're serious about her, than you need her to get to know _you_. You don't have to tell her your past. Just… You know. Stefan things. Your favorite color. Your favorite book. What you wanna be when you grow up…"

Finally, _surprise_. He looked a little unnerved that I had changed the topic to him and Elena's relationship, but we weren't going anywhere with the whole Damon's-A-Bad-Guy conversation. We'd just end up talking in circles. _And _the whole reason I dragged him in here was to talk about Elena.

"She's going to dump me?" Stefan looked comically concerned and upset. "I wouldn't blame her…" And now he was getting angsty. "I can't stand feeding her lies, keeping secrets from her…"

"Wrong answer, dickweed." I puffed out my cheeks. "She really likes you. You really like her. You losers deserve to be happy, but you have to stop sabotaging yourself. It's over, Steffy. You went ripper, you did a lot of bad, but if you don't stop living in the past and let all your potential happiness slip through your fingers than what is the _point_? Forgive yourself already. Move on. Be happy."

The bell rang loudly and I brightened, pulling out my phone. I had to text Damon about Stefan fucking with us.

"See you in French, burger tits!" I said happily, skipping past Stefan who frowned at me, looking baffled.

* * *

With both Jenna and Elena out of the house and on dates, Jeremy and I decided to move his Xbox into the living room and play on the large flat screen TV. We surrounded ourselves with snacks.

"Quit knifing me, holy shit!" I had to be the worst Call of Duty player. _Ever_. "Goddamn you. What happened to the Gilbert team?"

"That was before I remembered you sucked." Jeremy shrugged, twisting open a Snapple. "Do we really have to have the bird in here?"

I glanced over to Poe, Damon's crow, who was pecking at the Doritos bag and grinned in amusement. "Aw, Poe isn't so bad, J."

"You named it?" He frowned. "_Poe_? As in Edgar Allan Poe? I thought he was all about ravens… Whatever. It's like a living nanny cam. Kind of creepy. And there's not much Damon can do from Georgia if that Elijah freak shows up."

"True. But he's just keeping an eye out for us."

"Yeah, but… It's not like we'd invite Elijah in for tea or anything." Jeremy yet again knifed me. God. Damn. It. "So the whole crow thing is kind of pointless, especially since Georgia is like… nine hours away."

"Maybe he just wants to watch us die."

We fell into an amused silence. Elena came home before Jenna, all smiles, and plopped down in between me and Jeremy, snatching the controller out of my hands. So rude!

"I take it your date went well?" I asked, frowning, as Elena easily started destroying everyone via sniper rifle. What the hell? She could play this game? And she was better than Jeremy!

"Yup!" Elena gushed, a wide smile on her face. "Oh my God, Clare! It was _amazing_! I didn't even get a chance to tell him that we needed to talk, because he just started telling me things about himself! We made some serious progress, I feel so much closer to him now…" she trailed off with a dreamy sigh, her smile becoming a little loopy. Awww.

Poe squawked at her, flapping his wings, as if he were laughing and Elena shrieked, nearly shoving me off the couch as she pulled her legs up.

"What the hell! There's a crow in the living room!" She shrieked, throwing a pillow in Poe's direction. He merely squawked back at her and Jeremy sniggered.

"Yeah that's Poe." Jeremy grinned as I took the controller back from Elena's hands. She gripped my arm, eyeing Poe warily.

"It's Damon's crow." I explained loosely. "I'm babysitting."

"Why the hell does he have a crow?!" Elena cried. "Get it out of the house!"

"Aw, he's harmless, 'Lena." I assured her happily. "So the date was a great success?"

Elena huffed, gave Poe a dirty look, and snatched a soda can off the coffee table. "It was a really big surprise. I was sure the date was going to be a bust, because it started off pretty bad with Stefan acting distant and weird. We bumped into this older guy who thought he knew Stefan, I guess, and Stefan got weird on me…"

I nodded. "It happens. When I first saw Stefan, I thought I knew him from somewhere, too. A TV show actually. I wasn't gonna say anything, but Stefan kind of looks like Angel. Remember that show? The one about the broody vampire who wants to be good?"

Jeremy spit out his Snapple and burst into laughter. "They _do _look similar! I've just replaced all the scenes with Angel in them and put Stefan in his place!"

"Ha. Ha." Elena said sarcastically, tugging the controller from my hands. "You seriously suck at this game."

* * *

Damon's tight grip on the steering wheel hadn't loosened since receiving a text message from Pretend Brother. He was nearly to that damned bar, and he had been half tempted to turn around. Pretend Brother's text message continued to run through his head: _there was a blue canary nightlight in my locker_. What the _fuck _did that mean?

_Someone _knew of their little alliance and was mocking them.

_Fucking fantastic_.

* * *

Next chapter: The car wash and Elena will be finding out about Stefan being a vampire, one way or another! ;D

Alaric will be officially a part of the story in a few chapters, this was just a way to introduce him to Jenna, given so much has changed and he needs a foot in with her since Jeremy is getting his shit together and won't need special credit to boost his grades. However, he's still going to assign that report since Jeremy needs to read the journals and meet a certain vampire! I know, it was pretty cliche with how Alaric and Clarissa met, but I couldn't resist breaking her nose!

**Q: WTF CANARY NIGHTLIGHTS?/Why couldn't Clarissa see it?**  
Spoilers! You guys will find out soon enough! Don't worry, it's important. It's a part of Clarissa's lil plot. She can't be in TVD without creepy shit happening around her. Clarissa saw the ones at home, especially when someone _pointed them out _to her, but she didn't see the one in the hotel room. It'll be explained!

**Q: The blood bond between Clarissa and Damon?**  
Again, I KNOW, I'M SORRY! It'll be explained soon, too!

**Q: The vampires imprisoned in the tomb?**  
As for right now, I'm fairly sure they're going to make an appearance, if only because Stefan on human blood acting like a druggie makes me laugh. And because, in directly, they set up a chain reaction that I think is pretty significant. Like Caroline being turned.

**Q: DON'T KILL ALARIC! **  
Nobody dies. Because happy fic!


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, not even Clarissa.

Wow guys, your support and kind reviews have been really amazing. Over 400 reviews! THANK YOU SO MUCH: Dark-Tiger, marie65291, Joeyackles2, tablekorner, ddluzelle, ADORATIO, Britt, Vampire I No Drama, LoveLiveLife22, XxbriannaxX, MrsMusicAddict, JackieOh, vikki. dillard, Moka-girl, SomebodyWhoCares, MelissaIsLame, Caribbean Trinidadian, Realhuntress18 ("That came to me in a dream" oh my god I'm laughing so hard.), Randomreader1320, 1llu510n, Cara, Apatu (I do! I'm two seasons behind, though, because Netflix still hasn't updated. Ugh.), Lucilla Tinwetari, Guest, NikCaroline, antsnpants, Lana Scott, Guest (2), kdpierce2, Chaos-and-Insanity (I didn't care for Tomb Raider, but I heard The Last Of Us is seriously addictive), madison. g. johnson, SinfullySilent, Sunblaze99, nessafly1 (oh god, don't get burned! AND NO WORRIES, IT'LL HAPPEN! It'll be a birthday Stefan will never forget ;D), padfootfaerie123 ( superwholock! I KNOW THAT REFERENCE! *feels cool*), Kolliy, justlikeglitter, LOVETHISSTORY, CallistoAngel (love the iphone case!)

Also, last chapter I forgot to credit elisabethviktoria .perschel, who wanted _Everytime We Touch_ by _Maggie Reilly_ to be in the story. Thank you for the suggestion!

* * *

Despite the lingering frustration and anger which hovered over Damon's mood and dominated most of his thoughts, he was horrifically _bored_. But he'd been trapped in the same level of pissed off boredom since about an hour into the drive down to Bree's bar. There just wasn't anything to keep him amused, to distract him from his darkening mood, and he was forced to fall into thoughts he didn't want to fucking think about.

For nine and a half hours.

The first _glaring_ thought that plagued his mind constantly: Katherine.

Doubt had sparked in his mind and he almost hated himself for it. There _had _to be a good reason for him knowing almost nothing about her. The very moment his gaze met Katherine's, he had been passionately in love with her. Their _scandalous _and secretive love affair had quickly followed—they were merely too swept up in each other, too passionate, to bother with talking about the past or the future.

It stung hotly to know Stefan shared in that.

He and Stefan had exploded into a heated argument Monday morning, resulting in Damon staking his brother in the stomach and leaving him pinned to the wall as he stormed out. It was an angry, impulsive, decision to go to Georgia right then and there instead of a little while later, but he needed to get away from everything. So to Bree it was.

Stefan had to open his stupid mouth about Clarissa and the _nature _of their relationship. But then, Stefan had fucking decided to take it a step further and bring up how he was glad Damon was finally letting go of _Katherine_.

Damon had respectfully _lost his shit_, and flew at his younger brother. Somewhere between the fighting, Damon found himself screaming that Katherine was still alive and he was going to free her, that _he _had always loved Katherine more.

The fighting escalated until Damon broke off a wooden leg from one of the now ruined chairs and slammed it angrily into Stefan, snarling: _"I hate you because she turned you! I hate you because I gave up everything for you, I was always there for you, you were supposed to be my fucking brother, my best friend! I protected you from Father, from the war, I took all the blame for you, and the one thing that I wanted, the one girl I loved, you couldn't see past yourself and let me be happy? You made me like this!"_

He'd been so angry, for so long, at Stefan for selfishly taking Katherine from him. There had been certain points over the many years where Damon thought, perhaps, they were about to reunite but Stefan couldn't get past his own demons, past himself, to be _there _for Damon.

But now there was a nagging doubt that had embedded itself deeply and Damon couldn't shake it. Shouldn't he be angry with Katherine? For coming between them? For not _telling _Damon about Stefan, about her plans, about anything…? She had lived with them for six months, she _knew _how close they had been.

For a long time, Damon had convinced himself she had changed both of them because she truly believed he and Stefan would overcome the initial betrayal and hurt the other brother caused and forgive one another. He honestly believed, while selfish on Katherine's part, it was also done out of love—that she couldn't separate the Salvatore brothers, that she wanted them to have each other, and her, forever.

He loved Katherine. _All _of Katherine. Even her faults and her terrible selfishness. That was simply her nature and who was Damon to judge her?

…But had Katherine felt the same about him? Why hadn't he been enough, why did she even want Stefan? Didn't she care what that did to them? He never had anything to compare his relationship with Katherine to, and knew it wasn't fair to compare it to the one he had with Clarissa. Especially since the only thing between he and Clarissa was a strange friendship.

But after nine and half hours stuck thinking about this shit, Damon couldn't deny he had feeling for Clarissa anymore. It wasn't his fault, she _cherished _him in a way he'd never been cherished before. He'd be a fucking idiot if he _didn't _feel something for her. And he knew she felt something for him too, though it was obvious she hadn't yet realized it. Which was fine with him, he'd happily continue pretending it was just sexual tension. It'd be easier to leave her that way. Because when push came to shove, if she asked him to stay, Damon wasn't sure what he'd do. Though Damon knew she'd never ask him that. Because _Damon's _happiness would be placed above her own. But could he be happy, knowing she wasn't?

So why hadn't Katherine put _his _happiness above her own? Clarissa was selfish, Clarissa was dangerously impulsive, Clarissa tended to lose sight of everyone else around her when her own happiness was concerned. She and Katherine shared that. But Clarissa wasn't _in love _with him like Katherine said she was, and Damon's feelings _still_ _mattered_ to Clarissa. So what did that mean? Damon wanted to pass it off as a vampire thing. Or a very selfish thing.

But _he _was a very fucking selfish vampire, and it tripped him up inside when he hurt Clarissa—he couldn't even fucking compel her friends knowing it hurt her. Clarissa knew him far better than Katherine in the few weeks that they've known each other. …Or had Katherine known him just as well, and was unbothered to ease his hurts? He had always been so sure that love and misery was something that coincided. He was bound to Katherine, he loved her, he promised her _forever_. And Damon was stuck in a guilt for not being able to save her, for having her wait in misery in that tomb, that he had ignored all the pain that she may have caused him.

Freeing her from the tomb had been his one thought since becoming a vampire, it was his only salvation. Once she was freed, then he could finally be happy. All the pain, all the anger, all the hurt—it would go away. All the mistakes, all the failure, _everything_, would be forgiven and forgotten. He'd have her properly choose (and he was sure he'd be picked once she saw his loyalty and dedication to her) and he and Stefan would be able to put their anger behind them and move on. Become brothers again.

That's how it was supposed to be.

_But the doubt_.

Katherine spent _six months _with him, and while that was mere seconds for an immortal, Damon's few weeks with Clarissa had left a mark on him. She had become his exception, his birdhouse, his little human.

So what the fuck did that mean about him and Katherine? How could she not give a damn about hurting him like this? How the fuck could she keep secrets from him? Who the fuck was _Elijah_? Who the fuck was Katherine, for that matter? How could he not fucking know a damn thing about her? He could tell Clarissa _anything _and everything, why hadn't Katherine felt the same way about him? Why hadn't she fucking _trusted _him? Did _Stefan _know things about her? He gladly died for her! She had his soul, his heart, his body—what more could she have wanted? That she felt she didn't have? Why did she want _Stefan_ too? Wasn't he enough? Wasn't he _fucking _enough? _Clarissa _would choose _him _over her little friends if he wanted, she told him all her secrets, especially the ones she'd never tell anyone else. Why the fuck hadn't he had that with Katherine?

He had fucking drank Katherine's blood, while she drank his, plenty of fucking times—so why the fuck didn't he feel what he and Clarissa felt? Did that mean—that Katherine hadn't… Hadn't loved him as much as she claimed? It was possible whatever brought Clarissa back to life was the same reason for that bond, but _fuck_.

He was _bored_, and his mood was dangerously dark, and he was fucking missing Clarissa and he was fucking anxious to return back to Mystic Falls with those stupid fucking nightlights fucking haunting and mocking him. All he kept thinking about was how everything would be so much better if she were here, at least then he'd be laughing. At least things would be entertaining. At least he wouldn't be stuck bored and wondering if fucking Katherine actually loved him like she said she did. His mind was whirling and his chest ached, and he was feeling pissed off and confused and _fucking_ _Katherine_. She wasn't going to get a warm welcome out of the tomb, he decided. No. He was going to demand answers first.

He toyed with the idea of calling Clarissa and telling her everything about the tomb and Katherine. Clarissa always seemed to know what to do and say to bring him back from snapping. If he reached out to her, even in the dead of night, she would fix this. But he was afraid. Clarissa was very clever, she had a terribly good grasp on reading people, and she had been the catalysis for starting the doubt. Damon was afraid she would tell him something that he didn't want to hear and he wasn't ready to consider that seriously. He couldn't.

He had to believe Katherine loved him.

Otherwise everything he'd done… None of it would have _mattered_.

His phone lit up in his hands, Clarissa's name popping up, and Damon was bringing the phone to his ear. "It's one in the morning, what are you doing up?"

He pretended to be annoyed with her, but he was relieved she called _him_. Damon tilted his thoughts, refocusing them toward the crow and for a moment he was surprised to find that the damned bird was perched on Clarissa's headboard. She clearly took to the damn bird and he shouldn't have been surprised. Clarissa's hair was up in her usual messy bun and the laptop was out in front of her. He knew what she was doing. Research.

"_Taking a break from researching. How's Georgia?_" Clarissa's warm voice crinkled through the phone.

_Boring_. _Horrible._

"Fun." He lied, easily sounding relaxed and cheerful. "I met two _really _fun college girls."

_That_ wasn't exactly a lie, as both girls were currently curled up on either side of him. The lie was that they hadn't been at all fun, but annoying and giggly and sloppily drunk. But Damon had needed a distraction.

"…_Jesus Christ, is it sad that I'm picturing that scene from American Psycho when he's doing both girls in bed and is making muscles in the mirror and then starts, like, eating one?_ _Legit I'm picturing that_."

He had no idea what the hell she was talking about. "I've never seen it."

"_Oh you have to! It's a comedy! Well, I thought it was, anyway. I think the genre is horror. The guy who plays Batman is in it._"

"Christian Bale?" He offered, forcing himself to sound interested. Clarissa was clearly tired, she was _rambling_, and although he was slightly irked, he'd rather listen to her than sit in this dark room sulking.

"_I hate that asshole. The entire time I was watching Batman Begins, I was picturing Bruce Wayne running around naked, covered in blood, with a chainsaw_." Clarissa paused. "_So… What's wrong?_"

Damon released a breath, closing his eyes as he leaned against the wall. He could see her through the crow's watchful gaze, she was playing with a strand of loose hair, curling it around her finger. How the _hell _did she know something was bothering him?

"_D, somethin's been botherin' you all day, I know it has. Your texts were weird, and at first I thought maybe it was 'cause you were driving. But they continued, and even now I can hear it in your voice and the way you're responding. It's not _you."

He should have known, Clarissa easily saw through his charades and liked to set up little tests to figure out what sort of mood he was in if she was uncertain. It was one of her many talents, and he suspected it had to do with her upbringing. And her previous major in college. Or maybe she just _knew _him. Either way, Damon was quickly finding that it was more of a blessing than an annoyance. He could always count on Clarissa to know how he was really feeling.

His chest clenched, both with happiness and misery. So why hadn't Katherine known when he was hurting, when he was angry? Why had she believed his smile and forced cheerful tone when he and his father had gotten into an argument? When she told him she was spending the day with _Stefan_? _Had _she believed his charade, or had she simply not _cared_…?

"_Damon?_" Worry was apparent in her tone. "_Does this have to do with you going to Georgia? Did somethin' happen? Did you and Stefan get into a fight? He was late to school. We don't have to talk about it, you can tell me to fuck off and I'll change the topic_."

Damon wondered if anyone else ever picked up on the slight New York accent that traced the edges of her voice whenever she got into 'speech' mode, or when she was anxious, or was in the middle of an angry fit. He liked to think he was the only one who heard it, as he knew the truth about her.

"I'm having a shit day." He blurted out in a whisper. "Stefan and I got into a fight… I hate him." It sounded childish, even to his ears. "I hate him, Clary. Or maybe I thought it would be easier to hate him. I don't know anymore. I'm fucking confused. How could he do this to me? How could _she _do this to me? Why wasn't I enough? Stefan chose her over me, and she chose Stefan regardless of me."

"_Do you want me to tell you what I think, or do you need to vent?_ _'Cause you're not gonna like what I have to say._" He figured.

"I don't know what I want." Damon confessed quietly.

"_I think you want to forgive Stefan. I think you need him to grow the fuck up and stop seeing everything black and white, stop seeing you as the bad evil older brother. I think you both need to be brothers again. That's what I think. I don't know what to tell you about KP, I didn't know her, and even if I did know her, I don't think she let anyone close. Even the ones she loved._"

"Is that what I _want_?" He wanted to deny her words, he wanted to be angry that she'd even suggest that—but he was exhausted, and right now he needed Clarissa to give him some kind of direction. Because _fuck_, his little hummingbird _saw him_.

Maybe she saw what he needed, too.

"_I think so. I think you two have to sit down, talk about everything. You never hated Stefan, and he's never hated you, he's just immature and childish. He's just afraid to be hurt. You both are. And the both of you want to be brothers again. You both have to forgive each other and yourselves. I don't know if it'll ever be the same, but there is an eternity to work things out, to trust each other again._ _I know that you'd rather be small and angry, like a scorpion, and continue to hurt him. But I want you to be happy, and this is the only way, D._"

Clarissa seemed to compare him to animals when she was sleepy. And while he didn't want to do that with Stefan, not in the foreseeable future, he couldn't write her words off. Because they stirred something in his chest—a longing he forced himself to ignore for many, _many_, years.

"Why do you have the crow in your room?" He was changing the subject, because, fuck, he was feeling _better_. Clarissa's laughter spilled through, warming him, and a grin twitched across his face.

"_Poe and I have bonded_." She named the bird? She _would_. "_So do you often drive to different states when in a bad mood or…?_"

He rolled his eyes, crossing one ankle over the other as he stretched out. It was more than just feeling _better_, it was like he was never in a shit mood to begin with. "I was already planning on going to Georgia. I have a witch's talisman, so now I need a _witch_. Of fuckin' course witches have to be fucking difficult, and I need a _Bennett _witch. So it looks like you have to give Witchy the talisman and hope she can help me before or if Emily fucking possesses her into destroying it. That, and I need Emily's _fucking _grimoire."

Which was only half the truth. The talisman was enough to break the spell, but he needed those damn witches to put the spell back up after he got Katherine out. Bree promised once the grimoire was found, she would be able to help Witchy with the spell. Now all Damon needed was to get Witchy in touch with her stupid witch side.

"_Grimoire_?"

"Witch cook book. Has a bunch of spells." He explained loosely.

While it was true he sought Bree's help on what to do with the tomb, a simple phone call would have easily sufficed. The complete truth, the one Damon wasn't going to tell Clarissa about just yet, was he'd actually come for _her_. He needed Clarissa to be protected with just more than him watching her with a crow and Pretend Brother keeping an eye out for fucking nightlights. Especially when the nightlights wasn't his _only _concern. That other vampire's blunt threat still had him seething.

They talked for a while longer, but Damon was aware of the increasing sleepiness that slipped through her voice.

"I'm tired." He lied, because he knew she'd stay on the phone with him until passing out. "I'm hanging up now."

"_Awww, okay, D. Nighty night._"

He was opening a text message to her, despite just have disconnecting. _Thanks_, he texted, because he hadn't known how to bring it up while talking to her.

Her reply was almost immediate: _ANYthing for you Damon ;DD_

Damon's lips twitched upward. She was such a brat.

Another text came in: _Two mouths! I'm the winged dragon of ra!_

What the _hell _was she talking about?

He texted her back: _go the fuck to bed_.

He received a: _ok_ _night_.

Using the crow (he refused to call it Poe), he watched as she clearly went back to the laptop. What the hell did he just say? He texted her again: _I CAN SEE YOU_

He watched as Clarissa threw her hands up in the air and turned to face the crow, a wide, amused, grin sliding across her face.

Her text: _F U SALVATORE I DO WHAT I WANT_

With a slight nudge, Damon easily took control of the crow and made it fly at her laptop. Clarissa quickly gave into his demands, and Damon was grinning for the rest of the night.

* * *

I raised my eyebrows as Caroline dramatically placed her hands on her hips, showing off her ruffled white, pink and yellow polka dotted, bikini top. She was looking cute in it, with her hair braided in two pigtails that draped over her shoulders and tiny denim short-shorts that showed off the top of her matching bikini bottoms. She dropped her arms to her sides, frowning.

"You don't like it." Caroline looked down at herself. "I think I look good."

"You look _cute_," I corrected. "But you should be going for _sexy _if you want a boy toy. You gotta show off the girls, Care. The ruffled top is nice, but you aren't flat chested so it's unnecessary."

Caroline raised her eyebrows and nodded, a look of consideration crossing her expression. "This is why I have you around," she said, drifting back to her dresser. "Go get changed while I search for something _sexy_."

I had decided to forsake the cutesy Minnie Mouse bikini and had borrowed a white and pink striped halter-tie bikini top from Elena. I picked it over a white black polka-dotted one because this one had a bow in the middle, and I was a friggin' sucker for bows. I'd never worn a bikini before. I could rock a cute one-piece, especially the ones that kind of looked like dresses. I guess I never really had a reason to _want _to show off skin. That and my mother would probably tell me how _indecent _I was.

But now I was kind of digging it. I tried to tell myself Damon had nothing to do with this decision (especially since he was in Georgia), but I knew he influenced this at least a _little_. I didn't want to kiss him again (I totally _did _but couldn't), so I wasn't sure why I wanted him to see me prancing around in a bikini. Maybe I hoped he'd get the way I did when I saw him shirtless.

Maybe I just wanted it to be even.

Even though he was in Georgia, there was still _Poe_, and I guess I wanted to throw him for a moment. I was sexy, damn it. He could sleep with all the girls he wants, but he'd never get my fine ass, and I sure as hell wanted to show him just how _fine _my ass was.

Maybe I was a little annoyed he had a threesome last night. Just a little. Even though I shouldn't be. _Ugh_.

I threw on a pair of tiny shorts that would have my mother falling over in a state of mortified horror and tied my hair into a low side ponytail. When I returned, Caroline was wearing a nautical striped bandeau bikini top with a halter-tie and I grinned widely.

"Hell yeah, Care, you'll knock everyone off their feet!"

"Look at _you_." Caroline gushed, eyes lighting with approval. "Finally! I've been waiting for you to lose your modest, prude, ways!"

"Being disinterested and being a prude are two different things!" I huffed, fighting back an urge to start giggling. "Besides. I want to relish in my own feminine beauty."

"Uh-huh," Caroline's grin turned cat like as she placed some light hoodies in a bag (along with my camera). "I'm sure wanting to tease Damon with what he can't have has _nothing _to do with it."

My cheeks warmed. Damn it, I'm so transparent. "He's in Georgia, anyway, so…" Caroline merely hummed.

* * *

It didn't surprise me when we were the first ones to show up, as Caroline was in charge of this fundraiser and actually liked to direct how everything was set up. She might've been a bit on the hectic, all time controlling, side, but she really knew how to throw everything together perfectly in a short amount of time. She even took my phone so I couldn't continue texting Noah, and while she didn't expect me to help set up the larger banner she didn't want a 'repeated of yesterday' because _God _help her if I break my nose. What _did _surprise me was the total lack of adult supervision. It was like adults either just didn't give a damn, or it was such a small town there was a massive amount of trust going on here. I wasn't sure. I just noticed the lack of adult authority was a common theme.

Twenty-five minutes later, a good amount of girls in bikini tops and shirtless boys had shown up, followed by a decent amount of cars. Caroline squealed, springing up and down on the balls of her feet, and swatted my arm.

"Go get the camera, Clare!" She demanded. "I need this documented!"

I brightened and quickly turned around, skipping toward the table where our bag sat. I rummaged through, happily finding my camera and turning back to a grinning Caroline. I paused, eyeing her. She was _up _to something. I could see it in her evil little grin.

"What?" I asked, narrowing my eyes but she merely smiled sweetly and tossed me back my phone. Which I nearly dropped as I was holding the camera in the other hand.

"Tell me when it's recording!" Caroline said as I pocketed my phone that had been buzzing angrily at me.

Noah tended to get a little antsy when I didn't reply right away. The poor girl. I think she had anxiety and assumed I was dead. I held up my blue camera, turning it on, Caroline quickly adjusting herself and making sure she looked _fabulous_. I grinned.

"Okay!" I called to my blonde bestie as I hit record. Caroline instantly smiled brightly at the camera, spreading her arms out as though presenting the car wash.

"It's just another average sunny day in Mystic Falls!" She said, walking slowly backwards so the camera could take in the banner and the skimpy cladded teens washing cars behind her. "The gallant student body of Mystic Falls High School have come together in the wake of the reeling tragedy of Coach Tanner's untimely death to support their local football team, the Timberwolves, and raise money in the late Coach's—"

Poe swooped down at us suddenly, squawked angrily, and Caroline shrieked. She would have fallen flat on her ass if it wasn't for a tall blonde haired boy who easily caught her by the elbows. I frowned at Poe, wondering what the hell he was flipping a shit for.

"What the hell!" Caroline cried, still in the arms of the shirtless kid. He didn't seem to mind much. "Does that crow have rabies or something!?"

Laughing, I ended the video and padded over to the two. "Nah, it's just Poe." I said as the he flapped his wings angrily at me, flopping down on the ground next to my feet. I grinned down at him. "Calm your tits, Poe! Jeez."

Caroline looked at me like I was insane. "You have a pet _crow_? Get rid of that thing, Clare! Those things are disgusting, they carry diseases!"

"He's harmless," I assured her breezily, unconcerned. I lifted my camera and quickly flashed a picture of her and the guy she was leaning against. "She's single, by the way." I said to him and his grin widened. Caroline shot me a look and turned around to face the guy only to do a double take.

She clearly found him attractive.

"'Kay, me and Poe are gonna go mind the money! Have fun! Keep it rated PG!" I teased. Pay back for all the times she was a total tool around me and Damon. I wasn't even surprised when Poe hopped after me.

Having a pet crow was freakin' awesome.

Plopping down at the table, I swung my legs up on the other chair and pulled the tiny water gun Jeremy had lent me out of the bag. I was planning on spraying people with it like a power crazy car wash dictator. Poe flapped up onto the table next to me and I grinned at him.

"Looks like it's just you and me, buddy." I murmured lazily, placing the camera down on the table. My phone buzzed angrily again and I sighed, pulling it out. While it was cute sometimes, Noah needed to take a chill pill.

Only, I found, the massive amounts of texts in my inbox were from _Damon_.

Damon: _fuck me._

Damon: _I mean that in every conceivable way the phrase can be taken._

Damon: _Car wash?_

Damon: _THIS ISN'T VERY DISNEY OF YOU_

Damon: _stop making an amateur porno with blondie and answer my damn texts_

Damon: _I'm sending the crow._

Damon: _I almost crashed my car, I hope you're happy. Text me damn it._

Damon: _Stop ignoring me._

Damon's name popped up as my phone vibrated angrily and I fumbled with it. Confusion, amusement, _giddy excitement_, and a sense of empowerment all crashing and tangling awkwardly within me, all fighting to be the dominant emotion, as I quickly answered the call.

"D?"

"_Clarissa_," Damon's voice crinkled through the line, his voice a growl. A sense of giddy satisfaction flared hotly. That's right. I'm sexy. "_Why are you wearing that?_"

I fought to keep my smirk down. "'Cause it's a _car wash_, D, to raise money for the football team since Aslan killed the football coach." Damon's snort of amusement was audible.

"_Great, fine. Why are you sending me pictures of you _wearing_ that?_" Damon sounded frustrated but all my amused satisfaction was dwindling away as confusion crept upward. Pictures? "_You made it very clear that you don't want anything fun to happen between us like that, but this is sending mixed signals, Clary. Are you telling me you changed your mind, or are you just enjoying teasing me? You should know I only have so much self-control and I really hate denying myself. If you're going to send me that kind of shit, I can't promise I won't keep my hands off you._"

My heartbeat sped up with a bundle of nervous, _excited_, flutters in the pit of my stomach at the sound of his low voice. Even over the phone, it slid deliciously over me like velvet, promising me the world if only I gave into my growing desires. With warm cheeks, I pointedly refused to look toward Poe's black, watchful, eyes. My stomach flipped at the thought of Damon grabbing me _like that _again, his hands against my bare skin. _Goddamn it_.

"Pictures?" I managed, trying to sound composed and completely unaffected by his words. "What pictures?"

"_The picture text with you_..." Damon cut himself off and swore. "_You didn't ask Blondie to send that, did you? Goddamn it_. _Ignore everything I said before._"

I glanced toward Caroline, but she was heavily flirting with the tall blonde kid. I _knew _she had been up to something. Annoyance bubbled. Freakin' thanks, Caroline.

"So you're on your way back?" I changed the subject just as Bonnie bounced into view looking kick ass. I smiled at her warmly as Damon's voice murmured in my ear. She grinned and bent down, giving me a one armed hug. "Did you come with Elena?"

"No, she said she had to drop off Jeremy at Stefan's? Apparently he's doing a project and is going to talk to Stefan's uncle or something about the boarding house." Bonnie said, shrugging a shoulder. I raised my eyebrows.

Why hadn't I been informed of this? Apparently Damon really did like my idea, but when had he and Jeremy talked about it? I didn't even know Jeremy and Damon _talked _to each other to begin with!

"Sounds legit and not at all sketchy." I nodded in Caroline's direction. "If you can, embarrass her in front of that guy for me, okay?"

Bonnie rolled her eyes with a smile. "You two are the worst best friends ever. You're the one who suggested her getting a boy toy."

"She sent pictures of me to Damon! Looking like _this_! He totally thinks I'm a tease who is coming onto him, now!" I cried. "The point is to be a sexy minx, not look like I'm desperate for his attention!" Damon's laughter poured through and I nearly dropped the phone in shock. _Oh my God_, how could I have forgotten he was on the phone…? My cheeks heated, I'm such a freakin' dumbass.

"You're on the phone with him, aren't you?" Bonnie asked, amused. I merely stared at her, blaming her for distracting me. "Woooow, Clare, dumbest thing _ever_. Hi Damon!" She said louder, grinning widely. "Heard all about that mind-blowing kiss!"

"Bonnie!" I hissed angrily, lifting the water gun threateningly. "Go be a peasant and wash some friggin' cars!"

"_Don't worry, Clarissa,_" Damon was purring in my ear as Bonnie laughingly left me to deal with this by myself. "_I already know everything you do is strictly with me in mind_."

Anger flashed through me and I leaned back in the chair. So maybe I _had _worn a bikini top that was a bit revealing because of Damon, but that didn't _mean _anything. He wasn't even here and I hadn't planned on shoving it in his face. And if he _did _see… Well, I wanted to make things _even_. He easily flustered me, easily made me crumble. But he wasn't going to win this. Nope. I was sexy, damn it, and he _wanted _me. Which meant I had power. And I didn't want to melt to his words when he _just _had a _crazy wild fun night _with two college girls.

"You're not even _here_, D. I didn't realize Care was going to send you pictures to alert you to my choice in clothing." I said with easy indifference, crossing one leg over the other. Poe hopped closer to me, picking at the bag curiously with his beak. A grin twitched upward. I friggin' loved Poe. "I'm not wearing this for _you_. I only aim to please _myself_."

"_Mm. Let me know when you're tired of _pleasing _yourself, Clarissa_, _I think you'll find _being pleased _is so much better._" Damon's low, enticing, purr sent a shock of heat through my entire body, and everywhere his mouth had touched lit up, burning hotly.

"Are… Are you talking _dirty_ to me?" I managed after a moment, feeling too hot suddenly, too exposed. My head was spinning.

"_Would you like me to be talking dirty to you?_" Damon sounded darkly amused and my heart stammered inside my chest. Jesus Christ. I shifted, trying to shake the haze that started to cloud my thoughts. I had _just _told myself I wouldn't let him get to me.

And_ I_ was the one dressed all sexy that had _him _in such a state he sent multiple texts before calling _me_! No, he wasn't winning this!

"Nah, I'm good, D. Maybe one of the college girls you played with last night will be up for some dirty talk." I tossed back lightly. Good. That was good. I totally didn't sound anything but disinterested.

"_And if I told you when I was with them, I was thinking of _you _the entire time…?_" Damon's voice was pure silk. My heart skipped a set of beats and caught in my throat. "_That when I slowly sank my fangs into her neck, had her moaning under me, I was pretending it was _you_?_" Shit.

Searing heat coiled tightly in my stomach, my fingertips ghosting over the base of my neck, remembering the way it felt when he had bitten me. Remembering the pain tangled with pleasure that had scorched everything inside of me. How did this happen? He wasn't going to win this. He wasn't.

"If you told me that, maybe I'd tell you how I fantasize about you biting me," I breathed quietly into the phone. "Maybe I'd tell you I wouldn't want it _slow_, that I'd want you to grab me, yank my hair, and bite me _hard_. Rough. Maybe I'd want you to make me scream."

Damon _groaned_ lowly and my lips sprang upward. Got him. "_Yeeesss_," he hissed.

"So don't worry, I have a fantastic time _pleasing _myself, and I won't be getting tired of it any time soon." I said lightly, my grin growing. I win. I so win. "Gotta go, D! See you later. Bye!" I flipped my phone shut and tossed it into my bag.

Victory was delicious.

Caroline plopped down in the seat next to mine, cheeks flushed, a wide smile across her face. "Okay. So. His name is James, he's a senior and on the football team and he _totally _has a thing for me." I grinned at her, excited.

"Cha-ching, Care. Cha-friggin-ching."

Her giddy smile quickly turned cat like as she eyed me. "So…? Did Damon get the picture I sent or what?" Poe angrily squawked at her, answering how I felt, and she screeched. "Get that thing away from me, Clare! Shoo! Shoo!"

"C'mon, Poe. Let's go assert our dominance among the peasants." I bounced upward, grabbing the water gun. "Later, Care!"

"Tell me what Damon said!" Caroline demanded as I pranced away, Poe hopping after me.

I skipped over to Bonnie and Matt, both of who were eyeing Poe with looks of disgust and curiosity. "I'm babysitting." I answered their unspoken question. "And no, he isn't dangerous or disease ridden. His name is Poe." He flapped his wings in greeting and Matt grinned widely.

"Okay, I'm not going to lie, but that is super badass."

"You've been complimented, Poe!" I gushed to the crow. "Say thank you." He squawked, causing Bonnie to crinkle her eyebrows and inch away.

"As long as he doesn't crap everywhere." Bonnie murmured. "I still think it's super weird, though." I sprayed her with the water gun and she jumped back. Shock flickered across her face. "Clare!" A mischievous smirk flew across her lips. "It is _so on_."

Bonnie dunked the white towel she was using into a soapy bucket and flung it at me. I screeched as it smacked me in the face. Throwing it to the ground, I lifted the water gun and chased after her. Only to bounce away when she picked up the hose. I dove behind Matt. Jesus Christ, Bonnie plays dirty!

"Pin her down, Matt!" Bonnie demanded as she stalked towards me, holding the hose like a gun. Oh God!

"No Matt! Don't listen to her!" I said, peaking around him at her, using him as a living shield.

"Guys, put the water weapons down," Matt said with mock seriousness, holding his hands up as though to calm us. "Nobody has to get wet. We can talk this through."

"Either help me or face my watery wrath." Bonnie threatened playfully and Matt easily untangled my fingers from his shirt and pulled me forward.

"Matt! Traitor!" I cried as Bonnie sprayed the hose in my direction. The cold water hit my body and I burst into laughter, shooting Bonnie back.

"It was you or me, and I chose me." Matt grinned with a shrug. "Besides, a little…" he trailed off, his gaze focused on something over my shoulders. I turned, spotting a very cuddly looking Elena and Stefan. I glanced and Bonnie and she nodded.

We sprayed Matt with the hose and water gun at the same time causing him to rip his attention back to us. "Oh man, you guys got me!" He tried to sound playful, but his tone was falling flat. I felt bad for the kid. I really did.

"Nope. None of that tortured pining stuff. This is a tortured pining free zone." Bonnie said, dropping the hose back into the bucket.

Matt's smile turned sheepish. "I wasn't…"

"I'm gonna go say hi and gun them down for ya." I said cheerfully and Matt laughed, shaking his head, but whatever he was about to say was totally lost to me as I skipped over to the oblivious couple.

* * *

Jeremy still wasn't used to the boarding house, but he forced himself to keep his calm gaze on Zach who was animatedly talking. While he was never into drawing architecture, this place was _magnificent _and his fingers were itching to grasp a pencil and start sketching. Jeremy was hardly surprised this was where Damon lived, though. The vampire bastard thought he was a God among them.

"Actually, Zach," Jeremy cut into the poor guy's speech about the history of the boarding house. "I made that up, I'm actually here for something else."

Zach visibly deflated and Jeremy almost felt bad for the guy. "What can I help you with, Jeremy?" Zach asked, confusion apparent in his voice.

"I need vervain." This was kind of cool, Jeremy decided. He _felt _cool. And the sheer shock on Zach's face only increased the feeling.

"How—? You _know_?"

"I pay attention," Jeremy shrugged a shoulder, pretending to be indifferent, while he was about ready to burst into laughter. "_Strange _animal attacks happening around the time Stefan and Damon show up?"

The older man sighed, looking weary. "I'd tell the council but…" he trailed off and Jeremy wondered what council he was talking about and if Damon knew about it. _Probably_, Damon seemed to be countless steps ahead of everybody. Schemes within schemes. "I know, I should tell them. I can hardly get a good night's sleep anymore…"

"I just want vervain, I'm not really interested in getting involved. If you can only give me a little, that's fine. I mostly want it for my sister." Jeremy didn't want to sit here and listen to this guy's reasons for not going to the mysterious council. Zach frowned.

"Stefan told me he already gave some to Elena."

"Not Elena. My other sister, Clare." Jeremy stated and Zach blinked, obviously surprised by something. So Jeremy figured he needed to up the game a little, maybe make Zach feel guilty, or better yet, _compelled _to help him. "I've seen… bruises on her. And she seems to do whatever Damon wants her to do. I'm just worried." Right, as if anyone could get Clare to do something she didn't want to. Jeremy doubted even compulsion could change that.

Zach went pale, and nodded. "I'm sorry." He muttered, grimly. "Stefan is a good guy, even for a vampire, so I'm sure he'll make sure Damon stays away from her. Damon… Damon is just a _monster_."

Yeah, a monster who wears Minnie Mouse hats and plays video games with him. He wasn't sure what Damon was (a vampire with some issues, sure), but a monster wasn't _it_. Jeremy wondered why Damon spent so much time and effort instilling these impressions into people, but then he guessed an eternity can get very boring.

Twenty minutes later, he was walking out of the Salvatore boarding house with a tupperware full of liquefied vervain and a text message from Damon. How and when Damon got his number, Jeremy didn't know but wasn't surprised. He was starting to think Damon went out his way to live up to the cliché vampire stereotype. But given that Jeremy had already seen a completely different side of Damon, he was only amused. Damon was like a little kid trying to be scary.

Sure enough, Damon's chic blue Camaro seemingly materialized out of thin air and slowly rolled alongside Jeremy, the top down. Like Damon was trying to be _cool_.

"Get in." The vampire demanded cheerfully. "I have neither a van nor will I be offering _candy_." Damon flashed a fanged smirk and Jeremy raised his eyebrows. That was lame.

"Okay, but it'll cost you." Jeremy replied with a shrug, not bothering to open the door as he hopped into the passenger seat. He was still feeling really cool from his Covert Mission: Locate the Vervain. He held up the tupperware. "He showed me where it was, too."

Damon's smirk became pleased. "Betraying your own kind for a vampire, tsk, tsk. I _like _these modern day Gilberts."

Jeremy didn't even have a chance to reply (though he wasn't sure what he would have said anyway as it was true), because Damon carelessly flung something at him. Easily catching it, Jeremy gazed down at the pretty silver oval pendant with a hummingbird engraved into it.

"When I said it'd _cost _you, I had been thinking like actual cash or maybe a video game." Jeremy said drily, knowing exactly who the necklace was for. Even without the hummingbird it was obvious. "But thanks, Damon, I'll be sure to wear it every day."

"You'll only have to dip it into the vervain once, for whatever reason it sticks to the silver permanently." Damon instructed calmly, either used to the Gilbert dry wit or found Jeremy's comments unworthy to respond to. It was probably both.

"Do you often drive to different states to buy jewelry?" Jeremy wondered, squinting at the pendant. He wasn't an expert when it came to jewelry, but he was betting this cost a pretty penny. Damon snorted.

"_I _didn't buy it." The vampire grinned cockily.

"Usually I'd say not to mention that part, girls don't typically find that _romantic_, but it's Clare, so…"

"I'm not doing it to be romantic!" Damon scoffed, actually looking _uncomfortable _for once. "Besides, if Clary thinks it's from _you_, she'll never take it off." Jeremy's eyebrows sprang upward at the poorly disguised _jealousy _in Damon's voice. "Just tell her it's a late birthday present or something."

Jeremy merely nodded and the two fell into a silence. Given that both his sisters seemed to have an obsessed vampire hovering, Jeremy couldn't help but wonder if somewhere down the line he was going to get one too. Maybe they had delicious smelling blood or something that had these vampires flocking. …Not that Jeremy particularly _wanted _more vampires to hang around, especially not any like that one Elijah creep.

"How's it going with that girl?" Damon asked suddenly. "Have you decided to de-birdhouse her?"

Jeremy turned his head back toward Damon, surprise pulsing through him. Damon actually wanted to talk to him about _Vicki_?

"I deleted her number and facebook," he admitted after a moment of trying to figure out what to say. "I miss her so bad, but I know she's no good for me, despite everything she's done _for _me. She has shit she has to take care of, and I hope she drops Tyler but… Vick will always be a part of me, even though… Even though being with her, loving her, is no good. Y'know? Just 'cause now I know she's not good for me, doesn't mean I can take back the impact she had, or the way I feel, or the place she has inside my heart. That won't change, even if I never see her again…"

Honestly, Jeremy felt he just needed to say it _out loud_. He had internet friends and school friends to bitch to, but they were all pretty much immature assholes. And while Clare would be willing to listen, he just didn't want to talk to her about this kind of stuff right now with the whole Elijah thing looming over her thoughts. But Jeremy hadn't expected, not in a million years, for Damon to be sitting quietly, clearly listening to every word he was saying. He had no reason to, this wouldn't win him any points with Clare given she wasn't even _here _and she'd never know. So _why_?

"It might not seem like it now, but you're better off." The vampire said quietly, his gaze fixed on the road. "Someone better will come along and you won't be too caught up and twisted around her to let them slip through your fingers."

Jeremy stared at Damon thoughtfully, wondering why he was even bothering giving advice. He'd been sure Damon didn't like him, the vampire was clearly jealous of his and Clare's closeness. He wasn't sure if it was a jealousy born over a sibling bond seeing as his and Stefan's (from what he could tell/heard from Clare) was pure shit, or if Damon simply wanted Clare's undivided affection. Since Jeremy was important to Clare, did that mean he was now (grudgingly) important to Damon?

"Thanks, Oprah." Jeremy intoned sarcastically, deciding that trying to figure Damon out would be too difficult and not to look a gift horse in the mouth. Damon's lips twitched upward. "Hopefully that'll happen before either we're invaded by nightlights or Elijah finds us."

"At least life isn't boring." Damon pointed out lightly. "It'd make for an exciting first date."

Jeremy snorted. "Yup. Please excuse the canary nightlights that are following us and that creepy vampire sulking in the corner. They're after my sisters. No biggie."

The vampire actually laughed, and not in the taunting or diabolical way but in the amused kind of way. Like he was just a guy interested in his sister but didn't mind hanging out with her younger brother. Jeremy didn't really get it, and he doubted Damon wanted to be _friends_, but he could appreciate the gesture. The vampire who was supposedly the bad one and _wasn't _dating one of his sisters was the one who was actually making an effort to get along with him.

Noticing that the car was slowing down, and that they were down the street from his house, Jeremy turned his attention back to Damon.

"Before when you said I was betraying my own kind, well, I'm _not_. I don't see it as humans against vampires. For me, it's the people I care about against the people I don't, and while I think you're a real _dick_, you're the good kind of dick." Jeremy decided to just go for opening the door normally this time. He slid out of the car. Damon's expression was unreadable. "So I guess if you ever need help with this secret vampire hating council, let me know. And if you want, tomorrow after school I can show you where the vervain is. Just break in uninvited like usual."

"Jeremy." Damon called, turning Jeremy's gaze back to him. Damon held his stare steadily, his expression serious. "I already promised a Bloomingdale's employee that he can be my first gay experience, I'm sorry. I'll let you know if he thinks I'm the _good kind of dick_, too."

As the vampire sped off, Jeremy realized he hadn't laughed this hard in a long time without being under the influence.

* * *

"How long does it take to get towels?" Elena wondered with a huff, irritation weaving through her pouty voice.

Caroline had left five minutes ago after Elena told her they were in need for more, and I had opted with sitting with her. Now that I was tired of getting into water fights with Bonnie and Matt. _Especially_ since somewhere along the line Tyler had brought over large water nerf guns. Caroline had hidden mine, as she wasn't happy that we were _goofing _around, but she didn't take _Tyler's_. So the game had become _who can hit Clare the most_. Which stopped being fun and I had gotten cold enough to throw on one of the light blue hoodies Caroline packed.

I was also really surprised by how quickly everyone seemed to grow accustomed to Poe's presence. He was currently happily eating sunflower seeds in a small dish between Elena and I that someone had brought for him. Bless this small town.

I deciding to out Caroline for taking the water gun away. "She and James are probably making out somewhere. He followed her into the school."

"I guess I can't be mad at her for that…" Elena trailed off with a small sigh just as an old dark skinned guy wandered over looking a little out of it. She smiled at him politely, obviously distracted. "That'll be twenty dollars."

"Do we have a code that says you're off the hook when it comes to making out with boys?" I wondered with a frown. But now Elena was eyeing the old guy with a furrowed brow and I might as well just be talking to myself.

"I saw you last night." She said slowly, dark eyes lighting curiously. "You were talking to a friend of mine? At the grill?"

With perked interest, I leaned closer, gazing at the older guy. He had to be at least in his sixties. So that meant he probably recognized Stefan from once upon a time ago. Oooh, Stefan, you're busted!

The guy gave a small nod. "Well I… I thought it was somebody that I knew."

"Stefan Salvatore." Elena prompted, resting her chin on her hands. I nodded.

"He has one of those faces." I said with an amused grin. "Like someone you'd know from your past." Like a vampire that never ages.

"That must've been it…" he agreed slowly, almost resigned. "I suppose it was just my mind playin' tricks on me."

"You seem like a pretty spry guy, sir." I said with a dismissive flick of my wrist. "It was probably just an honest mistake. When I first saw him, I thought I knew him too!"

"Where do you think you'd seen him before?" Elena cut over me, clearly not wanting me to go into my _Angel _rant again. I had made her buy the boxset on ebay and I think she was kind of pissed off about that still.

"When I first moved here, I stayed at the Salvatore boarding house." The man explained and she brightened, her curiosity burning loudly. I wondered if Stefan was listening in. "Stefan was just passing through to visit his uncle. I mean, none of us knew he was even here until the attack."

"The attack?" Elena pressed and I wondered if she was like me. Once an idea was born, I wondered if she'd obsess over it until coming to the truth. I _hoped_. Oh God, yes.

"His uncle got killed. Mauled by an animal in the woods."

It's like Damon didn't want the Salvatore line to continue.

"Maybe we should move." I suggested. "So many gruesome animal attacks. It's like… these animal attacks have _patterns_…" Come on, Elena. Work this out.

"His uncle, Zach?" She frowned, confused.

"Like these animals are _serial killers_…"

"Nnn-hmm." He shook his head. "Joseph."

Elena paused, her dark eyes flickering toward me and I stared back at her, silently compelling her to put the pieces together. "I'm sorry, sir," she smiled awkwardly at him. "I don't think I'm familiar with the story."

"Oh, how could you? I mean, this happened years ago."

"This has such a _supernatural _feel to it." I murmured pretending to be deep in thought. "Maybe we have werewolves." Elena smacked my arm. Uncalled for!

"Grandpa, you gotta go. Mom wants you home. Okay?" Tiki turned to us with a sigh as he wandered away. "He wasn't bugging you, was he? He's a little…" she waved a hand about airily. "Alzy-heimer."

"Ah. No. He was sweet." Elena, hardly listening to her, grabbed my arm, pulling me out of the chair and dragging me after the old guy. She easily caught up to him, lightly placing a hand on his shoulder to draw his attention back to us. "Hey, sir, I'm sorry. Um, are you sure that the man that you saw, that you knew, his name was Stefan Salvatore?"

"Yes. I remember his ring and his brother…"

"It's an unforgettable ring, it's so gaudy and big." I nodded. "Like he has to compensate for something…" Elena didn't even seem to hear me, her eyes fixed on the guy.

"Damon?"

"Yeah. Damon and Stefan Salvatore." He said firmly, stretching out their names. It was too bad I didn't have portable speakers, I'd play the Inception music.

"…When was this?" Elena asked quietly.

"It was early June," this guy was really dragging this out. Like, end the suspense already. "1953." He nodded to himself. "Yeah. June. Nineteen. Fifty. Three."

Elena stared at him and I was about ready to burst into laughter. Could he say that _any _slower? Maybe he needed to repeat it a few times! I think that's what we needed right now!

"What was the date? I didn't catch that." I lied, trying to keep my grin off my face.

"Nineteen fifty three." He repeated in a slow, firm, voice, stretching the numbers. Like as though this was a turning point in the show and had to be extra dramatic.

But it was real life.

So it just sounded so _silly_.

"In June, you said?" I asked.

"Yes. That's right. June."

"June 1953?"

"June 1953." He confirmed.

"June. Nineteen fifty-three."

"Yes."

"_Juuuuune, nineteen fifty-three_."

Elena threw me a look, snapping out of her shock, and I smiled at her. "_Clare_," she huffed, in her warning voice, and turned to the man, smiling. "Thank you, sir. Have a nice day!"

Her grip on my arm was tight, her expression thoughtful. Come on, Elena, make me proud. Follow the clues! I half wished I had thought of this sooner. Damon and I would've had a ball putting blue paw prints all over a bunch of vampire stuff.

"Well… they did say that the rings were passed down," I said lightly. "And the names Stefan and Damon have been around since the 1800s. Weird family, huh?"

"But he said he _knew _Stefan. From…" she trailed off, not letting herself follow the train of thought.

"Family tend to look alike." I shrugged, watching her with growing excitement, purposely being as disinterested as I could. "And that guy is a little old." As I hoped, my reaction didn't satisfy her and she pulled her lip into her mouth, chewing on it.

My disinterest only fueled her want, her _need_, to seek the truth.

_Yeeees_.

She faltered, her gaze flickering over toward Stefan. He noticed us and grinned, wiping his hands off on his jeans as he approached. His green eyes shifted towards me.

"Hey, Clare," he greeted warmly. "No water gun?"

"We don't speak of those dark times, Steffy." I said gravely. "Those water fights will forever haunt my memories."

"Mmhm." Stefan was clearly too used to the way I was, and I was going to have to up the batshit level soon. He was also clearly picking up on Elena's mood. "You okay? Free from money duty?"

Elena smiled, but it was tense and she ran her fingers through her hair. "Caroline ran off with a boy. We've been abandoned." As though thinking it would defuse the situation, she pretended to pout.

And Stefan immediately dropped it, grasping her hands.

What a sucker.

Literally.

"We still have Poe. Poe would never leave us for any boys." I assured her, patting her shoulder comfortably. But then I realized Poe wasn't around. "He left us for sunflower seeds! That dick!" Just like Damon! Leaving me for girls he's fed on!

"Poe?" Stefan furrowed his brow at me, confused.

"Hey, so," Elena cut in, obviously bursting to dig for information, and Stefan promptly forgot I existed. Thanks. "I realized earlier I had no idea that your family was from Italy."

"Salvatore just doesn't sound Italian." I agreed sarcastically but she loudly ignored me.

"Hmm, Clare picked up on that, and you didn't?" Stefan raised his eyebrows, grinning in amusement and I stared back at him.

What was that supposed to mean? Was he saying he thought I was dumber than Elena? "Hey!" What the hell, Stefan? You dick! Elena blushed prettily, ducking her head.

"Are there any other Salvatores in Mystic Falls?" She bat her eyelashes up at him, smiling sweetly and it was a damn good thing that he was so smitten that he couldn't pick up on her forced casual tone.

Oh, Elena, we're going to have to work on your dig for information. You are awful.

Stefan actually looked thoughtful. Mystic Falls wasn't that big of a place, what is there to think about?

"My uncle Zach…"

"And all of the illegitimate children Damon probably spawns." I quipped a little bit more moodier than I had meant to sound. Elena and Stefan looked at me with surprise and I shrugged. "Whoops. I forgot you two can't have children, being diseased and all."

Stefan shot me a not-so-subtle look that I smiled back at, and Elena blanched.

"You can't have children?" She asked, eyes wide.

"It's so sad, Stefan and Damon end with _themselves_." I said with mock sadness.

"I, uh, I think this is a conversation to be had during a different point in the relationship…" Stefan said quietly. "And I'd rather be the one to talk to you about it." His gaze became pointed. Hey, not my fault Elena was becoming suspicious.

"Oh! Yeah. Wow. No. You're right." She gave an awkward little laugh. "Wow, that's Jenna, suddenly we have to go say hi." Elena gave me a meaningful look but I literally had no idea what she was trying to convey. She smiled sweetly at Stefan. "We'll be back."

She dragged me away from a very confused Stefan and over toward where our aunt was sitting, looking terribly bored, at a picnic table.

"Your car was done like an hour ago," Elena greeted, drawing Jenna's attention towards us. She sighed, frustrated, and stood.

"You're saying that out loud, _why_?" Jenna asked, raising her eyebrows, just as a well-dressed man, _Logan Fell_, walked out from around her. I spotted the white TV van and I had a feeling I knew why Elena came over here.

At least I hoped she was thinking what I was.

"Hi, Elena and Clare, right?" Logan asked with a charming smile, his voice charismatic. I didn't like him. I didn't like assholes who cheat and think they can just slide back in, all smiles and charm. "I think I met you two once." He held his hand out and Elena shook it warmly. "When you were nine."

He turned to me, offering his hand and a friendly smile but I sniffed, looking down at him in a very snooty Everett manner. "Ew. I don't know _who_ that hand has been _with_."

Elena shot me a look while he laughed. I wasn't trying to be funny, dick.

"Ouch. Can't say I didn't deserve that one." Logan said with a warm smile, his gaze tilting back toward Jenna who looked faintly amused. At least she wasn't pissed. "Here I was hoping we were making progress, but if your niece's obvious disdain is anything to go by..."

"Is he in your good graces enough that I can ask him for a favor?" Elena wondered with a small pout, looking hopefully up at Logan with her wide doe eyes. I brightened.

I knew exactly what she was doing! Logan had access to old papers! Oh, Elena, you brilliant twin! Dig, dig, dig!

"If I do her a favor, will I get back in your good graces?" Logan smiled disarmingly at Jenna, his gaze fond.

"Uh, a very reluctant maybe to both." Jenna was fighting a smile. It was obvious they both still had very strong feelings for each other.

Didn't mean I was going to accept him until he _proved _he was a different guy.

"Done." He paused. "Wait. One condition. Dinner, tonight, your house."

Jenna glanced at us, Elena raising her eyebrows with a tiny, _knowing_, smile while I shrugged. "Fine. But you're eating _leftovers_."

"Ooh." Logan obviously liked Mean Jenna, and I wondered if this was foreplay. I couldn't deny they had an adorable chemistry.

But he cheated.

And I liked the way Alaric looked at Jenna _more_.

"What do you need?" Logan asked warmly and Elena brightened, smiling at him hopefully.

"Do you have access to old news stories? Say… Fifties?" When Elena was nervous, she tended to gesture a lot with her hands.

"Yep. At the station. Between the archives and the internet we pretty much have everything." Logan bragged and Elena nodded, as though what he had to say was hella important.

Good.

So good.

I was _so _proud.

"I have this report, way past due…" She was giving him the doe eyes now. "It'd be a life saver…"

Jenna glanced at me quickly and I shot her a secretive smile. She knew that Elena was nuts about us doing homework _first freakin' thing_ when we got home.

"Headed there now." Logan said at once. "Let's go." She smiled sweetly, waiting a beat as he walked away.

"A report, huh?" Jenna made a humming noise. "I don't even want to know."

Elena turned to me. "If anyone asks, you have no idea where I am. I don't want Care to know I left." Her gaze flickered past me. "And keep Stefan distracted…"

"I'll try." I was a little bummed she didn't want me to play detective with her, but oh well. I turned to Jenna who was texting. I glanced down at her phone, spotting Alaric's name. My lips flew into a grin. "You have Alaric's number?" I asked in gossipy sort of whisper.

Jenna blushed, quickly looking over her shoulder. "Shh!"

"It's not a bad thing! Logan can't expect to waltz back into your life, anyway, he should know he has competition and _work _for it." I encouraged with a wide smile and Jenna _giggled_. She _totally _liked Alaric.

"No, no, there is no competition." She denied with a small smile. "I just thought it would be nice for Ric to know somebody if he does move here to teach."

"So it's _Ric_ now, huh?" I wiggled my eyebrows and she swatted my arm. "I'll just give you two some privacy…" I was skipping away before she could sputter out a retort. Now I _really _hoped Alaric was gonna teach here.

Because next to Alaric's warm friendliness, Logan's charm and charisma would look cheesy as hell. And Jenna needed to see that.

"I know what Elena is up to."

I flailed and would have fallen face first into the car if Stefan hadn't easily caught my arm and pulled me back into a standing position. I wrinkled my nose. "You were eavesdropping?" I pretended to be mortified. "You horrible person!"

Stefan stared at me with a fixed look, his face serious. "Damon follows you around with a crow." He pointed out flatly.

"Yes, and Damon is a horrible, crazy, vampire." I agreed, prodding Stefan's chest. "You can't expect Elena to sit around and not inquire. Honesty and knowing shit is important to her, and she's going to follow the clues. You could've told her."

"I'm not _ready_ yet." Stefan groaned, pushing his fingers through his hair. "It doesn't help that you've been nudging her along."

"What kind of sister would I be if I didn't help her out?" I wondered, waving my hand about airily. Stefan furrowed his eyebrows and caught my wrist, pushing up my sleeve and looking at my tattoo.

"You two got _matching _tattoos?"

"Duh. What else are two impulsive people supposed to do when they run off to the city?" I dismissed and Stefan's mouth curved into a wry grin.

"Funny. Damon nearly said the same exact thing when I noticed his."

I opened my mouth to reply, but something flickered in the corner of my eye and I frowned, turning my head. That had been happening a lot today, thinking I see shit in the corner of my eye. I puffed out a breath, and turned back to Stefan to find him watching me closely, concern apparent.

"Oh. I keep thinking I see something." I shrugged. "I didn't sleep much last night." I had been researching. And then I called Damon.

"Nightmares again?" He asked softly and I blinked at him. He knew I had nightmares? "The last time you couldn't sleep and thought you saw something it was because you had nightmares."

_Oh_.

"No… No nightmares." At least, not last night, anyway. And I wasn't about to tell him I dream of him going ripper and killing me. That'd be awkward.

"Nightmares?" Damon's voice murmured in my ear and I spun around, a wide smile blooming across my face. He straightened, smirking at me, his familiar blue eyes squinting down at me.

My heart burst open with glee as I took in every inch of his face, a sigh of relief flooding me. It was as though I had been waiting all this time to see him again. All at once, I realized how much I _missed _him. I missed his voice, and his face, and the way he looked at me, and the way I felt when he was nearby. I just missed _everything _about him.

"Damon!" I gushed happily, flinging my arms around his neck. He easily scooped me to him, returning my hug (which made everything flutter with happiness) and lifting me a foot off the ground. I melted in his embrace, delighting in how comfortably I fit to him.

"Missed me?" Damon purred teasingly, lowering me so my feet touched the ground. I lifted my head, smiling brightly up at him.

"Painfully, _desperately_." I teased back, his grin growing as his blue gaze drank me in. "I counted the seconds until I could see you again."

"We shall never part again, my sweet Clarissa." He vowed passionately, gently taking my hands into his and bringing them to his mouth.

"It's been a _day_," Stefan frowned at us.

"No, it's been 165,600 seconds of anguish." Damon corrected, never taking his gaze off of me which became curious as his picked at the sleeves of my slightly damp hoodie. "Why are you so wet?" _Ha_.

I looked at him inquisitively. "I thought that's how you wanted me to be." I puffed my lips out into a confused pout, widening my eyes innocently. Stefan made a strangled noise behind me as Damon _stared_. Hell. Yeah.

He suddenly yanked me closer so I was pressed against him, his fingers gripping my hip tightly. My heart bounced. "No, Clary, I want you to be _soaked_." He murmured in his soft, silky, commanding voice. Lightly, he stroked my cheek with his index finger, igniting that consuming electric heat deep within my stomach. I fought to keep my eyes from fluttering shut, because, damn it, I couldn't melt to his touch. To his words. "I know you have a fondness for doing things _yourself_, but if you want my help…" the hungry suggestive growl hung heavily between us and I was desperately trying to remember how to breath. Heat pierced through me, blanketing my cheeks, as his darkening blue eyes clawed at me.

But I _won_.

Because veins were crawling across his face. That meant I affected him _more_. That meant I made him lose control _first_. The victorious satisfaction drowned out the growing, mind numbing, heat that had started to coil around me.

My mouth sprang upward into a haughty smirk and his gaze flashed down to lips. "Getting a little _fang on_ for me, Damon?" He dragged his intense gaze back to mine, a soft growl rumbling in his chest.

"Stop." Stefan groaned. "Guys, _stop_. I'm standing _right here_."

Judging by the irritation that flickered across Damon's face, he had forgotten Stefan was there too. He let me step back from him and I turned to give Stefan a teasing smile.

"What's wrong, Steffy? Not fond of water gun talk?" I asked playfully. "Afraid the water gun will be loaded with holy water?"

"That's a myth." Stefan eyed me warily.

"Not for you it isn't, sinner." I assured him gravely and the look he threw me was one of reluctant amusement. I never knew such a look could exist until I saw it on him.

Like he thought I was hilarious and it pained him to feel that way.

What a beautiful relationship we have.

I brightened at the sound of a song I haven't heard in _ages_! _Birdhouse in your soul _by the _They Might Be Giants _was playing cheerfully on the radio. I bounced on the balls of my feet.

"We have to go," Damon said suddenly before I could even open my mouth to tell him about the song. Something flickered across his face—an urgency? But it was gone before I could get a good read. "Come on, let's get something to eat."

Well, I wasn't one to turn down food! I grinned. "Okay, lemme get my bag."

* * *

"Anything interesting happen other than you breaking your nose on a door?" Damon asked in what I was sure he thought was a casual, indifferent, voice. He kept glancing at me, his eyes so very blue. I wondered why he didn't just come right out and tell me what he was _really _wanting to know.

I had thirty-seven text messages from Noah.

"Well, the guy who caused me to break my nose," I was glad we could talk about that like it was no big deal. I scrolled through the texts that varied from normal, to anxious, to wondering if I was pissed off at her. "Had a mini freak out when he saw me. Like he recognized me and—"

Damon violently slammed on the brakes and I jerked forward, the seatbelt cutting deep into my skin. I hissed in pain and threw him a look but his intense gaze killed anything that had been bubbling in my throat. I blinked, taken aback.

"Why the _fuck _am I just hearing about this now?" Damon growled, his blue eyes slits. "I told you to _tell me _if _anything _at all unusual happens, Clary!"

"Don't be mad, D," I cooed softly, trying to soothe him. He growled lowly back and I smiled at him gently. "Nothing happened. It's _okay_."

"Don't you use that tone of voice with me. This is _serious_. I'm not fucking overreacting!" He hissed back.

I sighed. So much for that. "Damon, if he worked for or with Elijah, Elena and I would have been kidnapped, long gone, and probably dead by now. He would have acted immediately and even having Poe watching me would have done nothing." I told him seriously and he recoiled, blue eyes flashing furiously. "He didn't recognize Elena and he looked at me like how you look at her. Only with more anguish and disbelief and confusion."

All of Damon's rage fell away leaving him to stare at me, furrowing his brow. "If he didn't recognize you for Katherine…"

I nodded calmly. "Mmhm. He must know the woman you met a few years ago." I hadn't thought of it before, but Damon either _killed _her or turned her into a vampire. It was the only thing that would explain Alaric's sadness. That poor guy, holy shit.

Damon released a long sigh. "You should have told me, regardless."

"It isn't exactly my top priority right now," I admitted. "I kind of forgot about it. Elijah and KP are my top priority, then the other woman I look like—which, by the way, I want her name, and then you."

"I'm _third_?" Damon actually looked a little offended. "Why _third_?"

"Because why we were able to feel each other's emotions isn't nearly important as to what Elijah wants or why I look like both KP and…" I gazed at him expectantly and he sighed.

"Isobel." He said after a moment. "Two years ago she tracked me down. She wanted me to turn her, and so… I did. I only spent a few days with her, telling her the basics on how to survive, the usual."

"So if I look like Isobel… and KP wasn't a Gilbert, then that leaves only one explanation." I murmured thoughtfully. Good God, does the drama here ever end?

"You and Elena aren't _Gilberts _by blood." Damon followed my train of thought, a dark smile curling. "Well, that would explain why I had such trouble refusing _Isobel_." Gross.

"You have a fetish for KP's bloodline, D." I stated and he rolled his eyes at me. "We are never, ever, having sex. You legit had sex with this Clarissa's mom. That's just weird."

"Who said we had sex?" Damon scoffed, clearly annoyed. Was he kidding?

"It's _you_." I said flatly. "You have wild vampire sex with everything."

"Jealous?" He smirked at me and I hated the jab of irritation that prickled.

"Compel me to not want you anymore." I demanded, fed up with this whole thing. It was clearly only going to put a strain on everything. He blinked, leaning back in a state of surprise.

"_What_?"

I crossed my arms moodily. I was just so angry suddenly, and I knew exactly how to get at him. I'd _make _him want to compel me. "I don't want to want _you_. It's irritating the hell out of me, so compel it away."

"Go fuck yourself, Clary." Damon snapped waspishly, fury laced heavily in his tone and I stared at him in hurt shock. I knew he'd be offended, and even hurt, but fuck, it wasn't _fair_. I didn't _care _that I'd hurt him. "_You _wind me up and make me want you so bad, and then you turn around and fucking say this to me? You don't _want _to want _me_—great. I don't fucking want _you_ either, but we're stuck in this!"

I ripped the seatbelt off me. "You're a selfish asshole, you know that?" I snapped, angrily throwing open the door. "You want everything but you _can't have it_! I'm not going to sit here and try to smooth down your ruffled feathers because you can't handle being slighted! For once, Damon, for _once _don't make this about _you_!" I slammed the door, shaking with anger. I didn't know where I intended to go, given I didn't know where I was, but I just needed to get away.

He slammed me into the car, _hard_, looming over me angrily. Pain broke over my lower back as I struggled to stand upright. "Have I _ever _denied you?" He exploded furiously and I stared up at him with wide eyes. I had honestly believed he would've driven away in a fit of rage. "Damon kill me! Damon I want Jeremy to know! Damon the plot! Damon be my friend! Damon! Damon! _Damon_!"

His fingers wrapped tightly around my arm, yanking me upward roughly and into him. I struggled to keep myself from crying out in pain, my heart choking in my chest as I tried to breath normally. I pushed against his chest but he held on tight, my arm throbbing painfully as my attempts to break free went unnoticed.

"Think carefully, little Clary—think _real _fucking hard. Have I ever _denied _you something you flat out asked me? If you said, right now, Damon stake yourself! I would laughingly tell you no as I did it!"

"Da—" I attempted, stricken.

"_No_," he hissed. "Don't say my name, don't. Don't ask me to do this, I can't stand it. I won't do it. The _only _thing that makes this madness bearable is knowing you want me just as badly. You think _I'm _being selfish? By what? By respecting your fucking decisions? By caring about you too damn much to get you to sleep with me? I could, _easily_, have you begging for it. But you want it fucking _special_, with someone you _love_, and I won't take that from you." He pressed himself against me tightly, trapping me between the door and his body. The world was spinning fast under me, my cheeks heating with conflicting emotions. With a sharp jerk, he tilted my head upward, forcing me to keep eye contact with him. His breath was hot against my lips. His blue gaze harsh. "You want to be compelled? _Fine_. Fucking kiss me."

I stared up at him with wide eyes, overcome with a sudden rush of _need_. He was just so _beautiful_. I couldn't explain it, or understand why I had been _denying _myself this. I raised myself to the tips of my toes, gently pressing my mouth against his as sweetly as I could, all the affection I felt for him brimming warmly. Damon was frozen against me but before I could pull away, and apologize, he shivered and leaned into the kiss. My heart fluttered happily as he curled an arm around my waist, holding me to him. His other hand slid across my cheek and weaved into my hair. He tilted my head more, deepening the chaste kiss slowly—only to suddenly jerk back, hastily taking a few steps backwards, ripping all the warmth from me. Nerves exploded—fuck, why had I _done _that?

"I'm—I'm sorry," I stammered, confusion swirling through me as he stared at me with wide blue eyes. "I don't know why…" but the guilt was loud on his face and I felt a sense of rising horror. "Did you…" Had he compelled me? To _kiss _him? I felt dizzy.

"You weren't supposed to kiss me like that," he breathed, staring at me with a sudden overwhelming intensity. "Oh _God, _Clarissa…" The way he was _looking_ at me... It was consuming, lit with such emotion that I was having trouble thinking.

"And how was I supposed to kiss you?" I asked quietly, feeling too exhausted to be angry with him. We were just so fucked. Everything was just so fucked. My lips pulsed, remembering his. Just _goddamn _everything.

"Angrily. I wanted your anger, your out of control lust." He murmured, almost as though dazed. "But the way you kissed me…" he crept closer, hesitantly, as though afraid of what I might do or say. "You're right, I am a selfish asshole. I don't deserve that kind of—"

"Compelling me to kiss you was a dick move, but then, so was what I did." I slumped my shoulders, guilt twisting upward. "I'm _sorry_, D. I didn't mean anything I said. I said it to hurt you, because I knew it would, and that makes me a real bitch. I'm just so frustrated, this isn't _fair_."

"Clary…" he breathed quietly, staring at me _in that way_. "Tell me you _want_ to want _me_, tell me I'm not alone in this. I know it's selfish, and I don't _care _if I can't have you in any kind of way. I just need to know, I have to know, have to hear you _say _it." His blue eyes peered down at me, a nervousness, an anxiety, brimming in his gaze and I stared back at him, helplessly. I felt like screaming. Didn't he _understand_?

"I need you. I _need _you, Damon. It's so far _beyond _want." I blurted out, unable to keep the words in, not wanting to keep them at bay. "You _consume _me. There is _only you._"

His intense gaze simmered into a softer one, his gentle impossibly blue eyes locking with mine. Slowly, as though moving any faster would have me rushing away from him skittishly, Damon's fingers looped around the zipper to the hoodie. I kept still, barely even breathing, as he inched the zipper downward, holding my gaze as though waiting for some sign that suggested protest until the hoodie was completely open. With a slight flutter of his fingers, it fell off my shoulders, hitting the ground with a soft _thump_. The chilly evening air stuck my bare skin. I shivered, but I didn't think it was because I was cold. I didn't think I _could _become cold, not with the way Damon was looking at me, with how close he was. His warmth rolled off him, sliding over my skin in soothing waves.

Hesitantly, after what seemed like hours, he lifted his hand and brushed the tips of his fingers down my cheek slowly. His gaze followed, caressing me with a tender look that had my heart fluttering nervously. Unlike the many times I found myself in a similar position with him, his touch wasn't searing but calm, soothing, even as he ghosted his fingers down my throat.

Damon possessed the ability to make me feel like nothing terrible could ever happen to me, and I wanted to stay like this forever, despite being so _exposed_. I felt so safe, so warm, so happy. He touched me as though I was something he cherished most in the world. The thought of it made my cheeks warm with rising emotions and his fingers grazed across my collarbone. His other hand wrapped around my arm, the one that he had roughly yanked on before, sliding upward to the spot that I hadn't realized was throbbing still, his fingers stroking what I was sure was a forming bruise.

"I'm jealous of whoever you'll end up loving, I'm jealous of whoever will get to spend the rest of their life with you." His voice was soft and all I could see was his soft blue eyes. "But he'll never have you like how _I_ have had you. And he can never be _inside you _like how I have been. And he'll never _feel _every inch of you brighten and come to life the way I have." He spoke with almost a reverence, his words like a caress fluttering over every inch of me, seeping in.

It was far too much.

This had to _stop_.

What I felt for Damon couldn't go past a bizarre friendship and this damn sexual tension. It was suddenly all very clear that I had the _biggest _crush on him which was teetering, threatening to fall into something terribly deeper. But now I knew it existed, and I could stop it. Now I knew to be much more careful. Because I refuse, _refuse_, to do this. I couldn't. I _wouldn't_. I was far too attached to him. I had to pull back, I had to put a distance between us. I couldn't let this happen to me, I deserved so much more in my life. I finally had a chance to start over, and I would be damned if I let _feelings _keep me from the ultimate freedom, the ultimate happiness.

"You're my blue canary, but that is all you can be." I said quietly, my fingers brushing against his chest. He fell away from me despite the fact that I hadn't applied pressure. "I won't ever end up loving anybody, because nobody can have me, not when I'm finally _free_. Look at what KP did to you? And you love her still, you love her forever. I won't ever let anyone do that to me."

The hoodie fell over my shoulders and I blinked in surprise, wiggling my arms through the sleeves as Damon zipped it back up. Gently he cupped my face, and before I could ask him why he was giving me such a serious look for, his mouth was on mine. My heart twisted painfully and I tried to push him away but I found that I could only pulled him closer as I betrayed myself, kissing him back. He pulled away, keeping my face cradled in his palms, looking just as miserable as I felt. This wasn't _fair_.

"Clarissa," my name was a soft plea. "I won't be selfish in the same sense that I'm being extremely selfish. I need you to need me, but I won't drag you down into this. I'll keep it from you, because you're right, all I can be is your blue canary. I have the rest of eternity to miss you and regret everything, and all I want is to enjoy every damn second with you now even if that means only I'll know how we both truly feel."

I stared at him in shock, panic rising as I realized what he _meant_. "Damon, don't you _dare _compel me." I said quickly and he smiled faintly. He held my face tight in his hands and my heart jerked. "_Damon_—"

"You're not going to remember any of this happened." His voice was soft, intoxicating, and I found myself relaxing. "The last thing you remember is marching out of the car angrily and I chasing after you. We fought, I talked you out of wanting to be compelled, and made you laugh."

I blinked, feeling a little hazy and tilted my gaze toward Damon who stood a foot away from me. I grinned sheepishly and he rolled his eyes, a teasing smirk twitching across his face.

"Get your ass back into my car, Clary." He pulled open the door and gave me an expectant look.

Feeling a little meek, I followed his demand without complaint. And while everything had been sorted out, I couldn't help but feel like something was left _unsaid_. Damon liked to pretend everything was fine when something was bothering him, but I couldn't place his mood.

"Have you decided where you want to eat?" Damon wondered lightly after a few minutes of silence.

"I'm sorry." I suddenly blurted out. "I'm sorry for being a bitch, for trying to hurt you. I was just… I dunno… I guess frustrated. And it's no excuse. I'm sorry." Amusement flickered across his face and I narrowed my eyes. "If that's not bothering you, what is…?"

"Would you believe me if I said it had nothing to do with you?" Damon's gaze flickered in my direction and I sat back in the seat, looking at him thoughtfully. He had been in a mood last night, he had been odd while we were at the car wash, and he _had _been forcing casual indifference before my shit fit.

He'd tell me if he wanted to, there was nothing more I could do. So I nodded. "Okay, D." Vampires were dramatic, I decided. Maybe he was on his period.

* * *

I sat cross legged in the booth at Wendy's, Damon across from me looking distracted as I built myself a house out of fries. I was half tempted to text Elena, but I didn't want to disturb her truth seeking focus. Without any warning, Damon's hand suddenly snatched my wrist, stilling my movement. I raised my eyebrows at him as he flipped my hand over, dropping something cool into my palm.

"It's the other reason why I went to Georgia," he said softly.

With renewed interest, I pulled my hand back, and peered down at a pretty vintage looking ring. It was silver with an engraved vine that coiled around the band, two silver leaves twisting upward, sprouting at the top which served as the setting that held a small round glass. It was like there were tiny fireflies inside the glass, twinkling and dancing between a bright white to a soft red to a gentle yellow.

"It's charmed," he explained lightly. "Red for when a vampire is nearby, green is for witches, white is regular humans." But there was _yellow_. Damon's mouth curved into a smirk as I tore my gaze from the dancing lights. His blue eyes gleamed. "Ring says you're not a regular human."

"Nifty." I held the ring back out to him, grinning faintly. "But I already guessed that."

Damon made no movement to take it back. Instead his gaze locked with mine. "You call me immediately when you see any color but white." His expression became serious. "And I'm not kidding, Clary. Keep it. I drove nine and a half hours to get that charmed."

I wasn't a ring kind of person. Though, I never had a charmed ring that had magical fireflies inside of it before. Feeling a little giddy, I slipped it onto my index finger, half surprised to find that it fit comfortably. "It _is_ really pretty…" I admitted, marveling down at it. "Where'd you get it from?"

"Don't freak out." Damon squinted his eyes at me and I frowned. Why would I freak out? "It… was my mother's."

"I can't have your mother's ring, D!" I cried. This was just _too much_! Damon rolled his eyes.

"She's been dead for a hundred and sixty-two years, Clary. She's not going to be needing it." He leaned across the table. "If it makes you feel better, after the whole Elijah thing, you can give it back."

I frowned at him, suddenly not wanting to give it back. "No, you gave it to me. You can't take back gifts." I mean, it fit nicely on _my _hand, and it was _really _pretty.

Damon fixed me with his _why do we hang out _look and I merely grinned at him pleasantly.

* * *

We decided to return to Damon's crib given that I didn't want to be in the house with that cheating prick Jenna was having over. Bonnie had sent me a pretty bitchy text about how me, Caroline and Elena were assholes for completely abandoning her at the car wash and she was going through some shit that none of us were there for (whoops). Caroline texted me to let me know she had an amazing make out session with James for like two hours straight and she'd call me later (ew, gross). Still no word from Elena.

Damon had caved and gotten me a milkshake. Actually. _Two _milkshakes. So I was pretty ecstatic.

"STEFAN!" I screeched excitedly, springing at the vegetarian vampire. He stilled, stopping mid-stride, and stared at me with confused green eyes. I crashed into him. "You're like Edward Cullen! ALL FOR YOU ELENA! I SHALL EAT THIS MOUNTAIN LION FOR OUR LOVE!" I burst into peals of laughter, crumbling. He hastily pulled me upward.

"Clare? Are you okay?" Stefan asked as I swayed against him, laughing so hard tears were forming. "Are you… are you _drunk_…?"

Damon suddenly appeared in front of me and pulled me from Stefan's arms, tossing me across the room. He flitted in front of me and looped an arm around my waist as he gently took my hand, twirling us around like we were waltzing. Only he kept flitting us about to random corners of the room.

"Quickly, Stefan! Make a vow of every lasting love in front of the whole world!" I said laughingly. "Otherwise Damon will turn back into the swan princess!"

"I reject your love, Stefan!" Damon grinned widely. "I choose death!"

"He wants your revenge, D! You guys can write a bad romance!" I cried delightedly and Damon shoved me from him causing me to flail dramatically backwards, crashing painfully into the wall and upsetting a painting. It crashed angrily to the ground just as Stefan appeared next to me, easily pulling me to my feet before I landed hard on my ass.

"Damon!" Stefan snapped, bringing me closer as if he had to protect me! So silly! "You'll hurt her!"

"Damon, you'll hurt her!" Damon mocked back in a whiney voice, a smirk on his devilishly attractive face. "Pfft!"

"The word on the street is…" I began, patting Stefan on the chest lightly. "That you liked to get staked. Is that something you do on your weekends? Get staked? I mean, if that's what you like to do on your free time, I am not judging."

"_What_?" Stefan furrowed his brow, pressing a hand to my forehead. "Maybe you should sit down, Clare…" Damon was suddenly before us, shoving Stefan backwards.

"She's sugar wasted!" Damon announced loudly, throwing me away from them. I twirled, tripped over my feet, and would have crashed if it wasn't for Stefan who flashed in front of me, easily keeping me from falling over.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Stefan growled, glaring at Damon.

"Stef, my man, you need to cool your deformed burger tits." I assured him happily. "D's gotta it all down, okay? He's totally cool. Totally cool. He's not even killing me!"

"I'm not even killing her." Damon agreed with an exaggerated nod.

There was a hesitant knock at the front door and I bounced giddily on my feet. "It's _daddy_! He's finally come home from the store!" I cheered happily, wiggling out from Stefan's hold and prancing to their door, flinging it open. A pale Elena was standing on the other side and I smiled brightly. "Elena! Welcome to the blood orgy!"

I wasn't sure how it was possible, but Elena seemed to grow more white, her wide dark eyes quickly scanning me. Shakily, she grabbed my arm and pulled me behind her, standing tense, rigid, like she was about to bolt.

"What are you?" She demanded in a shaky voice, looking toward Stefan who had now stood frozen a few feet from the door. He took a hesitant step closer and Elena jumped, pushing me further behind her as she backed up. Aw.

"Elena," Stefan choked, his expression pained. "Please."

"_What are you_?" Elena repeated in a whisper.

"Say it," Damon purred. "Say it, Bella!"

I burst into giggles and threw my arms around Elena's neck, nuzzling into her. "You're impossibly fast!" Damon flitted in front of me and pulled me away from Elena who gave a cry of surprise, looking near tears as she reached for me. "You're a werewolf!"

Damon threw his head back and howled loudly.

"This isn't funny!" Stefan hissed at us, looking furious at me for once in his whiney life. He turned his head toward Elena, his green his pleading. "Please, Elena, let me _explain_…"

Elena's wide eyes flickered from me to Damon and I smiled at her warmly.

"It's okay, Elena!" I told her happily. "They don't bite. Actually Damon does, but..."

"Clare," Elena's once frightened wide eyes had a shimmer of annoyance growing in them. "You… You knew this whole time," she said slowly, hurt and disbelief tangled in her voice, her look of betrayed shock moving toward betrayed anger. "You _knew _and didn't tell me? And… Jeremy knows too, doesn't he?"

At least she wasn't scared shitless anymore.

I raised my hands in defense. "I couldn't out your boyfriend to you! That's his job!"

I expected her to burst into anger but she merely stared at me, wide eyes filling with hurt tears. Christ, there goes my sugar high. "Is this all a joke to you?" She whispered and I found myself feeling insanely guilty. "Have you all been laughing at me behind my back...?"

"Kind of." Damon said cheerfully. Goddamn it, Damon. "We'd all get together in a secret location and talk about how you and Stefan are dating but you had _noooo_ idea he was a vampire and how hilarious that is to us. Actually, all we ever do is talk about you. Your existence is what really holds this friendship together."

"Stefan's a _vampire_?" I gasped, furrowing my brow and pretending to look floored. "I thought he was _gay_!"

"Oh God, we've been misunderstanding each other!" Damon cried, pretending to be shocked. "The secret is out, Stefan! Let's kill them at the count of three before they expose us to the town!" He spun me around quickly, grasping my chin and making a cracking sound. "I've killed her!"

"I am the dead!" I agreed as Damon threw me against his chest. I laid there, limply.

"Just _stop_!" Elena snapped furiously. "Just—for one damn moment, can you just _stop_? This is serious!" She whirled on Stefan, anger lighting her face. "You—how could you? How could you not _tell _me? _Don't come near me_! Those people who were attacked?!"

"No!" Stefan pleaded, eyes wide. "No! God, no!"

"He only eats animals." I chimed as Damon stroked my hair.

"Mmhm, I'm the one who went on a few killing sprees." Damon said pleasantly. "But I've changed! No more victims!"

"All for you, Bella!"

"I'm doing the Stefan diet! Bambi, here I come!"

"Get away from him, Clare," Elena whispered, eyes wide, all her previous anger draining away, taking my amusement with it. She looked sick. "He's… He's _killed _people… Oh my God," she choked, swaying, looking white as a ghost. Stefan moved towards her and she gave a strangled cry, staggering backwards. "Stay away! How could you, Stefan? How could you let my sister hang out with a... a... he's killed people! That's my _sister_!"

Anxiety and guilt flared and I pulled myself upward, straightening. Elena's distress was so tangible, I could feel it in my freakin' bones, and suddenly all I wanted to do was reassure her that she could trust Stefan. I mean, she really liked the guy, and he really liked her. Shit. I'm such an asshole. This wasn't _funny_ at all anymore, she was actually having a panic attack. And what was I doing? Making it a big joke. I had met Stefan and Damon knowing what they were, so I couldn't imagine what Elena was going through.

"Please Elena," Stefan begged softly, looking anguished and near tears, his emotions so raw that I looked away. This should've been private. "I would never hurt you, you're safe with me…"

"It's not possible!" She suddenly burst out, shaking like a leaf. "No… No, it's not… you can't… You _can't_…" Her frightened dark eyes flashed to me, a plea in them. "Clare… Clare, come here. Come here, Clare, it's… We'll go home, I'll make sure you're safe." She held her hands out to me, tears glistening in her wide eyes. "Everything will be okay."

Why was she trying to reassure _me_? I tilted my gaze upward toward Damon and his quiet blue eyes met mine. He seemed to have lost all amusement as well and gently pushed me forward. I glided to Elena, and she grabbed me, holding me to her tightly as if afraid we'd be separated forever.

"Come on, Lena, it's alright." I soothed. "I promise."

"No, no, no, no, it's not possible, it's not… Oh my God, it's not." She buried her face into the crook of my neck, as though to hide away from Stefan and Damon. Elena's fingers dug into my arms with a bruising grip. "Vampires… they're not real…"

"Stefan is still the same guy from a few hours ago," I promised her gently. "He just lives forever and drinks blood from animals. That's _it_. He's still Stefan. He's still okay. Do you think I would let him near you if I didn't trust him?"

"Those people who died," Elena broke into tears, clutching to me tighter. "No, no, no, no. How could you tell me _he_'s the one who kept you from—from k-killing y-yourself w-when… when…"

"It's complicated," I gently rocked her back and forth, stroking her hair as she clung to me, sobbing. "Damon is very, very complicated but you have to trust me. This isn't about Damon, anyway. This is about Stefan. And Stefan is a really good guy."

"Elena…" Damon's voice was soft and Elena flinched. His gaze met mine briefly before flickering back to her. "We're housebroken vampires. I mean it, no more deaths. And you don't have to trust me. In fact, you probably shouldn't. But Stefan would _never _hurt you, he would sooner die before he let anyone touch you. My brother… he's got a big, stupid, human heart. If there's anyone in the world you're the safest with, it's _him_."

Stefan was staring at him with wide, confused, eyes and to be honest, I was a little surprised too. But then, I guess, having Elena being freaked out by him and Stefan wouldn't be much fun. And deep down, Damon was a big softie. Not to mention he was a sucker for Katherine.

"Clare," Elena whispered. "Please. Let's go home. Please, let's just go."

"Okay." I gently led her toward the door, tilting my head to look toward a devastated Stefan. His green eyes met mine, pleadingly, and I offered a faint, reassuring, smile before looking toward Damon. "Night, D."

"Night, Clary." Damon murmured. "Be careful who you invite inside for future reference, Elena!" He called, teasingly, his lips springing into a taunting smirk. _Oh my God_.

Stefan snapped his head in his direction, looking ready to lunge and Elena stiffened. I shot him a look, trying to keep back the amused grin as I shut the door.

Damon was _such _a dick. Housebroken vampire, my _ass_.

* * *

**GUYS SUPER IMPORTANT!** I need to know, should I just change the rating to M? I really thought I could get away with it staying at T, but let's face it. This is Damon. If I change the rating to M, it's going to get smuttier even without them leaping into bed together. And I mean _by a lot_. But since I wrote this with the promise it was going to be a fluff pro-happy fic, I don't want to mislead anyone into reading things they're uncomfortable with, I don't want potential smut to be a deal breaker. Like, I could make a side fic that has the same chapters but added M rated material in it instead. Seriously, lemme know!

Woo, so this chapter took longer than I anticipated and ended up going into directions I didn't have planned. I hope you didn't find Damon's part OOC, I thought you guys should kind of see where he's coming from with Katherine and why he's not going to just be like fuck it and skip into the sunset with Clarissa. There is so much dysfunction in the world of TVD, they all need therapists. Now they have Clarissa, but I'm pretty sure she's going to make them all lose their sanity, anyway.

Originally, the whole last scene with Elena finding out about Stefan and Damon being vampires was supposed to be light and fun, but then it just didn't happen. And that whole scene between Clarissa and Damon outside of the car, that was completely unplanned too. I really felt like it was way too soon for them to get so intense with each other like that. I'm still half tempted to go back and take it out.

And everyone who could related to Clarissa Gilbert's depression/Clarissa's decision to include her new family into that kind of stuff, I'm sorry for the pain you guys go through but I'm glad you have the courage to talk to your family. And if you haven't, I strongly encourage you to. Don't suffer in silence.

**Q: Kol/Jeremy/Anna threesome?**  
CANON. I might not like love triangles, but I am TOTALLY up for a healthy polygamous relationship between the three of them! And the idea of Clarissa stumbling in on them is just hilarious!

**Q: Will Jenna live/Jenna should be in "the know"!**  
No deaths! Nobody dies! Nobody important, anyway. And yes! Jenna will be in the loop! I'm not sure how it'll be revealed to her yet, maybe Damon will forget she's the only one in the house that doesn't know and will do vampire shit in front of her. "Whoops!"

**Q: Will Clarissa stay dead if a normal person kills her?/If she dies as a vampire, will she come back to the undead?**  
Clarissa's ability to heal/come back to life isn't like the Gilbert ring, it doesn't have to be a supernatural injury or death. Don't worry, it'll be explained! As for the vampire part, I can't say, because spoilers!

**Q: How long will this fanfiction be? Will it continue going as long as the show does?**  
Nope. I'm not exactly sure how long it'll be, but I have no plans of continuing to follow the show much longer. I mean, for certain things, sure. But we're technically only five episodes in and like, this chapter and last chapter were following You're Undead To Me, and I had a lot of trouble keeping it canon to the episode. With some things, I copied script (and god did it kill me to do that) since I couldn't see a way around it and it was important.  
Like with the Originals showing up in season 1 instead of 3, I'm just... Like I have no plans to follow anything that happens in season 4. This will have an end. And possibly sequels if you guys want.

**Q: Elijah/OC?**  
I've gotten a few PMs about that, and I'm flattered you guys like the way I've written Elijah that much! If I did, it wouldn't be for another few months. I'd like to get further in this fanfic before starting another. And the OC wouldn't be at all like Clarissa, sorry!

**Q: Who will Alaric befriend first? Clarissa or Damon?**  
This is going to be a little tricky if we keep it realistic, considering Alaric is a thirty year old guy AND will be Clarissa's teacher. She's seventeen. He's certainly going to be friendly with her, especially since she looks a lot like Isobel which is going to be a point of curiosity for him. And then there's Damon, the vampire who (he believes) killed his wife. And then there's Damon hanging around Clarissa who LOOKS like his wife. Poor Alaric. But I'm thinking, when it comes to actually befriending, it'll probably be Damon. I kind of see Alaric being more of a father figure (his version of father figure) than a buddy to Clarissa, anyway. But that doesn't mean there won't be plenty of Darissaric (thank you RealHuntress18 for the name!) adventures!

**Q: Does Clarissa look a lot like Isobel?**  
Yes. While she and Elena share similarities, Clarissa STRONGLY resembles Isobel.

**Q: Noah's obsessiveness.**  
As you guys can see from this chapter, it's starting to tire Clarissa out a little. I can't say much more about what's going to happen with Noah. But you'll see soon enough!

**James/Caroline.** I wanted to address this, because it's not exactly a spoiler. Caroline's relationship with Damon is a large part of what molded her into the strong-willed and independent vampire she became later on. And as much as I hate to do this, she needs to go through that. James might not be a vampire, but he will be an abusive, controlling, asshole. Hate him.

I love the theories so far about what you guys think the nightlights are!

This is my least favorite chapter I wrote so far for so many reasons. GAH. Oh well. Hope you guys enjoyed, thanks for reading, it really means a lot!


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: Don't own anything.

* * *

Blinking blearily, I squinted my eyes trying to adjust to the darkness of the room. _3:21 AM _glared back at me in fuzzy lime green numbers on the alarm clock and I puffed my cheeks out. What the hell woke me? This royally sucked.

A pair of arms shot out, wrapping around me, and I nearly screamed in terror as I found myself being pulled backwards. Oh God, it was Stefan, come to kill me!

"Calm down," Damon's thick, throaty, voice murmured sleepily in my ear causing me to instantly sag against his chest, my heart thumping loudly.

"D?" I whispered, feeling so small with the consuming darkness surrounding me. "What…" I swallowed, trying to strengthen the sound of my voice. "What are you doing here?"

He chuckled lowly, his hot breath fanning against my shoulder. "I'm here because… _you've run out of time_."

I went rigid, nausea and biting panic slicing through me as Damon's voice shifted, becoming dark. I knew that voice. That wasn't Damon's voice! Bile burned my throat. Twisting in his arms, I whipped my head around, staring with wide eyes up at the vampire. Stefan's chillingly calm face stood out in the darkness, pumping horrified terror through me, my heart freezing at the sight of him. A cold, taunting, smile crept slowly across his lips. Not again!

"_Ste_—" I choked out and he slammed me down flat against the mattress, his long fingers winding around my neck tightly. I thrashed desperately, everything inside of me in a frantic panic to get away, to break free, but he kept me pinned effortlessly.

"Now, now, _Clary_," Stefan tsked, green eyes tearing into mine with cruel indifference. "What have I said about struggling?" A terrifying smirk flashed. "You know _exactly _how I like it. I can see why my brother likes you so much, you know how to _really _please a guy!"

Veins were spreading forebodingly below his eyes, his fangs glinting in the glowing green light from my alarm clock and I opened my mouth to scream but his grip on my neck tightened. I couldn't even _breathe_. Black spots were dancing as my vision swarmed, fading in and out. I remembered, vaguely, that I should be trying to attack his eyes. I read about that somewhere, that if someone was choking you to go after their eyes, but I could hardly claw at his _arm_. The pressure loosened enough to have me choking and gasping for air and he chuckled lightly.

"Why rush things? We have _all night_, Clary!"

His mocking tone, accompanied by his darkly amused eyes and the way he said Damon's nickname for me left me feeling hallow and cold inside. Stefan smiled twistedly at me, so completely void of any real emotion except for a chilling amusement that he was nearly unrecognizable. He hummed, playfully tucking a piece of hair behind my ear and my skin crawled.

"Let's see how many times I can kill you. Should we try for a new record?" His twisted smile widened and I slammed my eyes shut, tears leaking out.

I was dreaming! I _knew _I was dreaming! I had to wake up! I wanted to wake up!

_Wake up, wake up, wake up_!

I shot up in bed, my heart pounding erratically, terror clinging to my skin like sweat. These dreams were just a _bitch_. Reaching for the cellphone, my gaze flickered toward the alarm clock. It was only a little after midnight. _What the hell was I doing_? I sat, frozen, my fingers hovering over my nightstand. I could call Damon, and his voice would sweep through me and ease the terror. Hell, he might even show up.

But it was a _nightmare_.

Was I really going to go crying to him every time I had a scary dream? No. He was the one probably giving them to me anyway. Slowly, I drifted my hand back, my fingers curling around the pendant hanging around my neck for reassurance. Jeremy had given it to me, a _just because_ present, which still had me feeling warmed.

The window panel rattled and I found myself darting out of bed, the fear jolting through me as I rushed into Elena's room and dove into bed. She stirred awake, sleepy dark eyes fluttering open.

"Wha? Wha's wrong?" She asked groggily as I threw the covers over us and wiggled closer. She sat up a little, looking more awake. "S'mthin' happen?"

"I had a bad dream." I whispered and she relaxed, scooting over a little so we could share her pillow.

"S'bout?"

I couldn't tell her it was about her boyfriend killing me out of a crazy vampire bloodlust. Given she had cried for a while after getting home, I think it was safe to say that topic was still very sensitive. I looped my arms around hers. Maybe if I clung, when I went back to sleep I wouldn't fall back into the nightmare. I hoped to God I was actually awake and this wasn't going to be an endless dream in which I think I'm awake.

"Can I stay?"

"Mmhm." Elena sounded like she was already sleeping and I released a relieved sigh. "Jus' turn off the nightlight, s'really bright, Clare."

I frowned at her in the darkness. "What nightlight?"

She yawned, and turned so she was facing me. "The one in the corner." She murmured sleepily. "One of your canary nightlights. Stop putting it in the outlet, I can't sleep with it on."

Confused, I untangled my arms from Elena's and sat up. The room was suddenly lit in a blue light, a tiny nightlight glowing happily in the corner of her room and I wondered how the hell I was so oblivious to it before.

* * *

Idiot. Dumbass. Moron. Halfwit. Dolt. Imbecile. _Doodoo head_. Frankly, Stefan was running out of insults to call himself, and contemplated switching over to French. Gloomily, he refused to rise from his spot on the leather couch, staring desolately at the crackling fire that mocked him angrily from inside the fireplace. Elena's pale terrified face and wide, tear filled, brown eyes was burned into his mind. Something he was sure would haunt him for many years to come. Maybe even forever. The horror, the betrayed disbelief, _the revulsion_, pierced his heart.

His life was a tragedy.

He wanted to race after Elena, wanted to pull her to him and kiss her and swear the whole universe to her. He wanted to proclaim his deepest affections from the highest rooftops, he wanted her forgiveness, he wanted her acceptance. But more than that, he wanted her happiness. And if her happiness relied on him not being a part of her life, then so be it. He would burn in this anguish for the rest of eternity if it meant he knew Elena smiled once more. This was how it should have been, anyway.

Stefan was a monster. Unworthy of Elena's beautiful, sweet, adoring eyes and tender smiles, unworthy of her embrace, of her kiss. Unworthy to touch her. She was angelic, a gift, heaven sent. And he, a creature of darkness.

It had been like a scene straight out of a nightmare, Damon and Clare playing the devilish imps in the corner, their mocking, cruel, laughter ringing in his mind. They might as well have been dressed like little devils with the tails and pitchforks, dancing and creating horrible, terrible, mischief. But _no_. No, Stefan couldn't blame Clare. After all, Clare had snapped out of it and attempted to try to soothe her sister, even if it meant she had to shield Elena from him. Stefan couldn't even be angry with _Damon_.

Damon had been honest with Clare right from the beginning, while he, Stefan, hadn't been. It didn't matter what Damon's intentions or reasoning were for telling Clare, in this sense, his older brother was in the right. Stefan deserved every second of this tortured misery.

"Still brooding, huh?" His older brother's light, teasing, voice pulled him from his misery-induced thoughts and Stefan's jaw ticked. He clenched it, keeping from snapping something out.

_Brooding_. What the hell else would he be doing? The girl who had easily made him feel like he could finally be at peace with himself wanted nothing to do with him. She couldn't stand what he _was_! And here was Damon, making _light _of it all like usual.

"Don't you have something better to do?" Stefan wondered sardonically as the metallic smell of blood churned his stomach hungrily. Angry, hurt, green eyes glared toward Damon who threw himself down on the couch, two mugs in hand. "Like, I don't know, plan on how else to make my life miserable? We _have _all eternity."

Damon grinned cheerfully, throwing Stefan further into his misery. "Well, _somebody _is cranky," he said with a small shake of his head, tsking. He held out a mug. "Drink up, lil bro. The world isn't _over_." When Stefan didn't move to take it, Damon rolled his eyes and pushed it into his hands. "Relax. It's only Bambi and Thumper. I wasn't kidding about adapting your gross animal diet."

Stefan smiled bitterly back at him, holding the warm mug in his hands. He _was _hungry, but he didn't feel like eating. "Why even _bother_? You'll be leaving soon with Katherine, and I highly doubt she'll want to eat animals." He suddenly wanted to hurt Damon, wanted to make Damon hurt like how he was hurting. "Maybe you and Katherine can have a romantic date and feed off Clare."

His brother rolled the flinch into a grimace and eyed the mug, as though it were the reason for his recoil. As if Stefan's words hadn't bothered him. Why wasn't Damon striking out against him? It was what he _wanted_. He wanted to fight, he wanted Damon to be cruel and cold and rip him to pieces. He just didn't want to feel like agony anymore.

"This stuff tastes like crap," Damon commented on airily, his tone obviously forced. "I have _no _idea how you do it. Maybe I should ask Lexi to come down and give me _intense_ good boy training." A suggestive smirk flickered upward across Damon's mouth, blue eyes squinting playfully.

Stefan stared at Damon, surprise cutting through the melancholy as hope leap up into his chest. He quickly squashed it, as he had learned, one too many times, that he and Damon were not going to ever have what they once did. But for a breath of a moment, it was as though they were brothers again and Damon was trying to coax Stefan out of one of his brooding moods. Damon had always been the one to come find him, had always been the one who knew what to say and do to get him out of it.

But that had been before Katherine.

"I knew," Stefan said quietly, looking down at his mug. "That you wanted her. And I didn't _care_. But I didn't know that you were _with_ her…" Green eyes shifted, hesitantly, awkwardly, toward Damon. "I didn't know you loved her. I… it wasn't real. For me. She compelled me."

Damon stared back at him and Stefan knew what was coming. Damon would change the subject, or maybe he would snap at him. But _maybe_… Damon released a long, tired, sigh, setting the mug down and sprang to his feet. All the hope he shouldn't have had fell. At least he'd leave Stefan alone now.

"I need something stronger if we're going to have this talk," Damon muttered, drifting over toward the brandy and pouring two glasses. Stefan snapped his head toward Damon, disbelieving. "This drink together is _long _over do, anyway." Blue eyes flickered, almost uncertainly, in Stefan's direction and Stefan realized, with a jolt, that Damon might have been feeling the same way he was. "Don't think you're getting out of talking about Elena at some point tonight, though."

"Why?" Stefan whispered, gingerly accepting the glass, as Damon sat down across from him.

"Because I'm stuck with you for all eternity." Damon answered with a half shrug, downing the entire glass and making a face of disgust. He furrowed his brow, eyes hesitant and so very blue. "And because you're my _stupid _brother. If I don't kick your ass out of being a brooding little shit, then who will? Besides, Elena will get over it. Clary knows how to play therapist well and neither of us want you two sulking around. It's _so boring_."

"I'm sorry," Stefan blurted out, fingers curling around the glass as though he needed to hold onto something. "I'm sorry I forced this life on you, I'm sorry I—I couldn't… that I acted the way I did. Maybe… Maybe I've been blaming you for a lot of things that I shouldn't be blaming you for, and maybe I… I'm jealous of how easily you can control yourself. You get _everything_, and no matter how bad it gets or how hard you just _deal _with everything." Stefan lowered his gaze, green eyes conflicted. "And then you… Just became less _you_. Less and less and less. And it was my fault, _all _of it. Because I hurt you and I ruined you and I destroyed who you were. You _should_ hate me. I deserve it."

"You turned me and that's all you're guilty of." Damon said quietly, uncomfortably. He squinted his eyes as Stefan lifted his. They locked into a stare. "I've turned into a real douche all on my own."

The corner of Stefan's mouth twitched upward. "Clare seems to like you just fine, though."

"Birds of a feather." Damon dismissed and Stefan tried to keep back the grin. "Don't try to defend her. She's a douchebag, too. But she gets away with it because she's 5'2 and can play up the cute look. If I was 5'2 and cute, you wouldn't care that I go around killing people."

Stefan raised his eyebrows. "If I started thinking you were cute, I think we'd have bigger problems on our hands."

"Yeah, it'd be a serious downgrade from sexy." Damon agreed flatly, looking affronted. Stefan was sure if he rolled his eyes any harder, they'd fall right out of his head. But amusement was clinging around the hurt inside his heart.

He always realizes how much he missed Damon when they talked like _this_.

"Clare told me off." Stefan said after a moment of comfortable silence settled between them. Damon groaned.

"Yeah I'm not surprised. She does that. _Super_ protective." Damon looked almost bored, rolling his eyes, but Stefan picked up the trace of fondness in his voice.

"I don't… approve of… what you do. Because they're _innocent _people. But maybe the reason I'm so… Closed minded and judgmental is because I know you feel guilty. Like how I do. And I just…"

"Wish things would just go poof and be fixed." Damon murmured softly, his gaze drifting toward the fire. Stefan straightened, surprised that Damon knew exactly how he felt. "It's not going to be like how it used to be, Stef. But eternity is much longer than I realized, and maybe giving you hell is getting a little _dull_."

A faint smile flickered to life across Stefan's face, something warmed in his chest, and Damon tilted his gaze back to him looking hesitant. _Afraid_. Had Stefan been so wrong all these years? Had Damon wanted to fix things just as much as he had?

"Maybe we could double with Elena at family therapy." Stefan suggested lightly. He didn't want to push it, didn't want things to get too deep or serious when they were, _finally_, making some kind of damn progress. Damon's lips sprang upward and he snorted.

And suddenly, Stefan didn't _care _that Damon had killed the football coach or the others. Suddenly none of it _mattered_. Who was Stefan to judge him so harshly? Especially with his past? He could live with it, and maybe he could slowly and surely influence his brother to becoming _less _of a dick.

"First you have to get Elena to talk to you," Damon said casually. "Which means you can't sit around sulking. Win her back. Throw rocks at her window while blasting some shitty love song from the 90s."

"Are you seriously going to give me relationship advice?" Stefan frowned.

"Mm, I did wonders for Jeremy. He was in a terrible love triangle with that druggie chick. What was her name? Vicki?" Damon squinted his eyes in thought and then shrugged as Stefan blinked at him. "But we got to talking while playing Call of Duty—which, Stef, you gotta play. It's fun. And now Jeremy kicked her to the curve and isn't a drug using dumbass anymore. Hmm. Maybe _I _should become a therapist."

Stefan groaned and ran his hands over his face. It was going to be a long night.

* * *

I was rudely awoken by Elena's shriek. Moaning, I pulled the covers over my head.

"_GET OUT OF MY ROOM!_"

_SWAT!_

"Ouch! Elena! I thought we were _friends_!" I heard Damon whine. Jesus. Christ. "Stop—!" _SWAT!_ "Clary, make your—" _SWAT!_ "Seriously, Elena, cut it—" _SWAT! _"Okay, that's it! Give me that!"

I threw the covers off, sitting up, to find Elena was standing over me, smacking Damon in the face with a broom. Like he was an unwanted animal in the house. I wondered where the broom came from as he snatched the end of it, yanking it easily from her hands. She swayed, nearly falling over.

"What are you doing here?!" Elena demanded angrily, narrowing her brown eyes at Damon who rolled his own. Anger was good. I liked it over the tearful fear from last night. "You can't just break into people's houses!"

"Morning everybody." I said pleasantly, attempting to run my fingers through my hair only for them to get stuck and twisted around knots.

Great. Here I am, looking like a homeless person in a baggy shirt three sizes too big that reached my knees and ratty hair. And there was Elena, looking cute in a tank top and sleeping shorts, hair straight and pretty.

"Calm down, Judgy, I didn't _break _in. I was invited." Damon threw the broom to the floor, eyeing it with distaste. "I'm driving Jeremy to school."

"No you're not!" Elena scoffed, folding her arms while I slid out of the bed, looking at Damon curiously. He was driving Jeremy to _school_? "I don't want you anywhere near my family!"

"You're pretty ballsy," Damon grinned at her sarcastically as I snatched his sleeve, tugging him toward the door. It was too early for this. "Knowing that I'm a _murderous _vampire and making demands like that."

Way to go Damon, 'cause provoking Elena is a really smart idea.

"If you wanted to kill me, you would have by now." Elena growled.

"Exactly." Damon stopped short, slipping his hand into mine and pulling me back to his side. I stared at him, confused. What was he doing…? Elena's eyes snapped to our joined hands. I calmly laced our fingers. "And I haven't laid a finger on you, or Jeremy. Just because you know what I _am _now, doesn't mean I'm suddenly going to be a threat."

Elena folded her arms, raising her eyebrows. Early morning Elena Sass. Damon had no idea this was the part where he had to run. But he will learn. As I had learned. "You've killed _other _people. Just because you haven't hurt Clare or Jeremy or me, doesn't excuse you from you actions."

"And I'm not asking to be _excused_, I don't owe you any damn explanation." Damon rolled a shoulder, looking annoyed. "But my brother is more angst ridden than usual and it's _sooo _annoying. Let him explain himself. Or _don't_. I don't really care. It's not like you were the one hounding him about knowing who he was or anything." Oh, snap!

Elena deflated, just a little, and I took this opportunity to drag Damon through the joint bathroom and into my room. So glad that 'murderer' was now added to the list of why I shouldn't hang out with Damon. Why couldn't Elena be an unfeeling sociopath? That would have made everything _so much more _tolerable.

"Aw." I grinned at Damon, letting go of his hand and moving toward my dresser. "Look at you, being the big brother."

"Aw. Look at you, being the supportive twin." Damon mocked back, flitting next to me, his grin turning _filthy_. "Sleeping in the same bed, huh? I ship it." _Ew_, gross. "I've got some serious _Clarena _feels." Oh my GOD, EW!

"Hey, the only reason I was sleeping with her," I pointedly ignored the gross ass grin he was giving me. "Was because _you _keep giving me creepy ass nightmares. They're seriously freaking me out, D, so knock it off!"

"What, were you dreaming about living in a world without sugar?" Damon teased, swatting my hand away from my own drawer as he decided to take it upon himself to go through my underwear. I frowned at him.

"You haven't been giving me nightmares?" I asked as Damon lifted a pair of light pink underwear with little frills framing the edges. "Ooh, cute! Find me a matching bra!" I skipped over to my closet and threw open the doors.

"Nope, wasn't me. I was… busy last night." Damon murmured and I was pretty sure that meant he was doing someone. Good thing I didn't call. "But go on, tell me about your horrible nightmare."

"I thought I was awake in bed and Stefan—" _VEERRP_. I stared at Damon who didn't seem to notice he just ripped a pair of underwear in half with his hands.

"You had a dream where you were in bed with _my brother_?" Damon scoffed, trying to sound casual. What part of _nightmare _didn't he get?

"You've run out of time." I quoted, turning back to my closet. "That's what he says before brutally killing me." I picked out a cute penguin shirt and faded blue skinny jeans. I pulled the ruined underwear out of his hands and waited for him to apologize but he merely stared at me. "It's okay D, I forgive you for tearing my clothes apart." I huffed, pushing him aside to get a new pair of underwear and a bra, uncaring if they didn't match. "Now, get out. I gotta get dressed."

"You've seen _me _naked." Damon said lightly, amusement back on his face. I guess he lost interest in my dream now that he knew Stefan was just killing me. Nice. _Dick_.

"You forced that upon me." I reminded him. "You ripped your towel off. Right after killing me for the second time."

"Our intimacy shouldn't be restricted by rules or boundaries. There's no need for the pretense of modesty, Clarissa. Never between _us_." Damon murmured softly, all velvet and silk, speaking in a quiet, enthralling, voice. Between his gentle, compelling, tone and the way his blue eyes brushed across me, like I was a secret prize, Damon was difficult to deny. He could make it seem as though if I didn't get naked, right now, I would be doing myself a grave injustice. "You can take your clothes off in front of me. I have no aversion to nudity."

I slanted my chin upward, staring at him. _Modesty_. As if I had an ounce of that in my body. With the way he was tutting, laying his _Damon _charm thickly, suggesting I do something that was generally perceived as _unacceptable, _I was positive he was only trying to fluster me (which he did flawlessly). While he might've wanted me to take my clothes off (my body was his temple of worship, after all), I was certain that he didn't, even for a single moment, think I would, nor was he _actually _asking me to. Challenge freakin' accepted, Damon.

Really, he should've known better. I was _Clarissa_, damn it, and he basically just double dog dared me! Did he think he could get away with talking to me like that? And it's not like I was uncomfortable with my body. Hell, I used to walk around naked in front of my roommate all the time. And Damon was my blue canary. So there really wasn't any difference, other than the fact that I wanted to make out with him. One upping him in this would be worth anything that could potentially backfire or go wrong.

I smiled sweetly at him and Damon paused, his fingers, which had been playfully dancing over my shoulder, stilled. He squinted his blue eyes at me suspiciously. Given the length of the baggy shirt, he wouldn't be able to see my _lady parts _and I decided I'd only go topless. Because I didn't have the balls to be completely naked in front of him. Not _yet _anyway. I wiggled out of my sleeping shorts, tossing them carelessly to the side.

"Really?" He raised his eyebrows at me as I pulled the cute panda panties up my legs. "You're going to attempt to sneakily get dressed while I'm…"

I pulled the baggy shirt over my head and let it drop to the ground. Damon trailed off and was now staring at me with wide, disbelieving, eyes, his mouth falling open. Like he couldn't believe what he was seeing. He looked damn near awestruck and I felt deliciously smug. Ha _ha_. I tilted my head, placing my hands on my hips, as Damon's darkening blue eyes slowly slid downward.

"Now you know how to accurately picture me while you _please _yourself late, late at night," I said dismissively, easily pushing him aside with a slight brush of my fingers against his chest.

I could feel his gaze burning into me as I plucked up the bra I picked out.

"Mm. I don't _have_ to touch myself. Women, who have much bigger tits, by the way, eagerly do that _for _me." Damon attempted to sound unconcerned, maybe even indifferent, but his voice was low and husky. I glanced at him from over my shoulder, his blue eyes glowing with a hungry intensity as he gazed back at me. A rush of giddy delight pulsed through me.

"My funbags might not be big, but they're _mine_, so that makes them the best set of tits you'll ever see." I assured him with a sweet smile, slipping the bra on and reaching around my back, trying to clasp it.

Damon was behind me suddenly and I shivered as the small puff of air from his speed teased my bare skin. He easily clasped my bra but didn't move away, standing so closely behind me that I could feel the heat radiating off him, warming my cheeks. This is where it was probably going to backfire on me.

"When someone says they're Disney and all about true love, the childlike idiocy you typically display is expected as well as the reluctance to do anything _sexual _and _adult_," his fingers slowly moved down my back, the tips lightly brushing, and I sucked in a breath. His hot breath drifted across my cheek and down my neck. Christ.

"I'm _Clarissa_," I murmured, leaning into his warm chest, unable to help myself, as he pressed his warm hands flat against my skin. _Oh, God_. He settled his palms almost _possessively _over my hips, his fingertips digging into my pelvis bone just enough to cause my heartbeat to speed up and for my breath to hitch. "I can do and be whatever I want. And you know how much I care about _rules_. You started it, you shouldn't have challenged me."

His chuckle was low and breathy, wafting over my skin, as he leisurely glided his hands forward. Yes, things were definitely backfiring. All the control I had over the situation had now swung back to Damon so easily it was like I never had any to begin with. He effortlessly had me surrendering just by a slight touch here, a dark chuckle there.

"I mean it, I'm not opposed to this," his palms raked achingly slow across the front of my stomach, his nails lightly scraping, igniting a needy, hot, trail everywhere his skin touched. He was dipping his head lower and I found that all I could do was tilt my head, baring my neck to him, my eyelids fluttering shut. "But I can't, and won't, guarantee I'll be able to resist touching you."

His breath was hot in my ear, his hair brushing against my skin causing a thrill of excitement to bounce through me. His head was lowering as his hands skated across my skin, fingers caressing and moving upward slowly. His fangs painfully grazed over a sensitive spot on my shoulder and I shuddered with a growing _want_. A fiery, desperate, haze rolled over me, clouding my thoughts.

"Do you fantasize about me biting you… in other places?" His voice was silk against my skin, his words driving a blazing spear of lust through me which pooled almost painfully in the pit of my stomach. "Because_ I_ do. There are so many _other _places I'd like to put my mouth. I'd fuck you with my tongue until the only word you know is my name, and I'd make you scream it until your voice box shatters."

His palm flew across my mouth, a shock of pleasure jolting at the contact, as I gasped, my eyes flying open. I trembled, his hungry words ricocheting through me, springing the searing heat causing it to spill through me with a violent hiss. A snapping pain broke across me as he dug his fangs into my shoulder, nipping my skin, and my cry of pained surprise fell into a low, throaty, moan which was muffled by his hand. Every inch of me exploded into a heated awareness, my skin prickling with a rushing pleasure.

"Think about that the next time you're pleasing yourself, Clarissa," Damon growled hungrily in his low, commanding, voice and I whimpered helplessly against him.

And then suddenly I was nearly falling over. Shakily, I turned around, but he wasn't in my room anymore. _Holy fuck_. Dazed, I tried to shake myself out of it. Why was I resisting this again…? Clearly everything in my life would be better if I just gave _in_. Releasing a breath, I reached for the shirt I picked out and decided to put on a hoodie. While the shirt would cover the bite (which achingly throbbed in a sick kind of pleasurable way), I just wanted to be safe than sorry. A text from Caroline came in and I pocketed my phone, shakily making my way to Elena's room to let her know our ride was here.

"I'm…" She took a deep breath. "I'm going to skip. I need to talk to Stefan." A sense of determination stirred across her tight expression. Her pretty dark eyes shifted toward me and I nodded, smiling faintly.

"Okay." I was glad, to be honest. Especially with how I acted last night, I almost felt bad for Stefan. And I _really _felt bad for Elena. This was handled all wrong. "Give him a fair chance, try not to be so quick with the whole…"

"Judgmental bitch thing?" Elena give me a _look _and my smile turned a little guilty. "Don't think you and Jer are off the hook either, I can't believe nobody _told me_! And about Damon… I don't…"

"We'll talk about it later, after school, and after your talk with Stefan." I cut her off quickly. "Damon isn't something you have to worry about now. Just focus on you, your feelings, and Stefan."

I was pretty sure by the time school was done with, this whole vampire thing would be blown over. I mean, Elena and Stefan's love was destined. Literally. Inescapable. It was written in stone. Written in plot. …Unless that kind of stuff changed with the whole 'this is real' thing. Ugh.

"Elena is skipping, Stefan drama," I said, plopping into the passenger seat and Caroline gave a quick bob of her head. Glad that was a totally acceptable excuse.

"So I totally noticed Jeremy and Damon driving off together, what's up with that?" Caroline asked with raised eyebrows. "A budding bromance or is Damon getting whatever Gilbert he can?"

"I took my clothes off in front of him!" I blurted out and Caroline gasped, her head whipping around as she stared at me with wide blue eyes.

"You slut!" But a cat like grin had flown across her lips. She smacked my arm before turning back to focus on the road. "Tell me _everything_! Oh my God, tell me everything!"

Feeling ridiculously giddy, I told her about the _sort of_ dirty talk on the phone from yesterday and everything that had occurred and was said in my bedroom. I even confessed that I really enjoyed being bitten.

"_Really_?" Caroline raised her eyebrows, turning to look at me as we reached a stop sign. "His tongue and your hoo-hoo? He _said _that?"

"Yes."

"Your hoo-hoo? With his _tongue_?"

"Yes, Care, my hoo-hoo."

"He'd eat your hoo-hoo?"

"Yes!"

She stared at me, thoughtfully. "Why are you here in the car with _me_?" Caroline demanded, like this was the most scandalous thing in the entire world and not the whole friends with intense sexual tension bit. "You could be having amazing sex. Right now."

Oh my god! "I can't!" Why wasn't she _getting _that? Caroline scoffed, eyeing me again like I had just said one plus one equals three.

"I don't think you're going to last much longer, to be honest." She said bluntly and I groaned. "You guys are going to do it eventually. It's going to boil over and then _sex_!" She glanced at me. "You're on the pill, right? Because when it goes down, I don't think you guys are going to stop to think about a condom."

I huffed, feeling moody. I didn't even want to tell her I didn't have to worry about that. Given a) it wasn't happening! And B) HAHA HE'S A VAMPIRE I'M SAFE. Not that I was going to do anything like that anyway!

"I'm _not_ having sex with him. We kissed once, and it's never going to happen again." Even though I so badly wanted to kiss him again. Even though when he was close to me like that I wanted to do _everything_.

"Clare, you took your shirt off, he talks dirty to you, you talk dirty back! It doesn't _matter _if you're not kissing, because you guys are seriously intimate. Like _whoa_." Caroline exclaimed, about ready to hit me again. "Why are you so resistant? If true love was a serious issue, you wouldn't be doing _any _of what you are!"

I slumped in the seat, picking at the hem of my sleeve. "I'll put a stop it to." I know that I've said that to myself before, but this time I was serious. "Because I… I just can't. I don't think I could separate my feelings."

"When he touches you and bites you and talks dirty to you, do you take it… Romantically?" She looked at me with her eyebrows raised and I scowled back at her.

"No…"

"It's basically the same. You're already turned on like whoa. And if you go into it with a clear understanding where you two are and what the expectation is… I mean, feeling comfortable with each other and knowing what is okay and what isn't would be better than just getting caught up in the moment and having amazing sex. _Then _you might get your feelings all mixed up."

"Stop putting logic into this," I groaned. "Seriously. I can't do it. Not with Damon. He sleeps around too much. And I'm… I'm pretty jealous about it." My thoughts tilted back to yesterday. I had thrown a pretty big fit, I even stormed out of the car. Who even does that?

"Ask him to be sexually exclusive with you." Why was Caroline being a good best friend with sound, reasonable, logic? Goddamn it.

"I'm not doing that. It goes against his very nature." I refused, flatly.

Like seriously. I couldn't imagine Damon ever giving up wild vampire sex. I already told him plenty of times that I had no intention of asking him to change anything about himself. And I wouldn't, just because I couldn't control my hormones and got jealous about the other girls. No way. I wasn't that big of a bitch.

…And even worse, I was afraid of him being unable to do that for me. I was afraid of giving in, of doing things with him, and then knowing he had no problem doing the same thing with someone else.

"Clare…" Caroline parked and turned to look at me, seriously. "If you asked him, I think he would jump at the chance. In fact, I think he would gladly just _date _you. I think Damon really likes you."

I forced myself to snort at the sheer idea of him liking me, but my heart fluttered stupidly in my chest. "We're not like that." I wanted, needed, to believe we weren't like that. We couldn't be like that. It would ruin everything and I'd have to pull away from him.

"Are you _sure_? Because Damon is making an effort to include Jeremy into his life because he knows what Jeremy means to _you_."

No, Damon and Jeremy were _plotting_. Without me. It was different.

"I don't want to put those kinds of ideas into my head. I can't think about that way about Damon. He's not—we're not… I just _can't_." I sagged, feeling bummed. "If I liked him, or thought he liked me, it would ruin _everything_. He's still… really in love with his ex, and even though we're friends, he'd break me, Care. He'd break my heart. You said it yourself, Damon isn't the type. I know he isn't. I'm not going to try to change that about him just because I wanna jump his bones or may be on the verge of having a _crush _on him."

Caroline gave my hand a gentle squeeze. "Whatever, let's talk about _my _fabulously sexy and great boy time fun!" She said cheerfully, flashing me a wide smile and I relaxed, grinning back at her.

I could always count on Caroline to easily switch the topic.

She told me, in details worthy of an erotica, about her steamy make out session as we walked to Bonnie's locker. Upon seeing us, Bonnie slammed her locker shut and promptly turned around. Caroline and I glanced at each other.

"Is she ignoring us?" Caroline asked, loudly, as we easily caught up to our witch, flanking her on either side.

"I think so." I nodded, as Bonnie looked straight ahead, like she couldn't hear us.

"That's a shame, she'll never know you took your clothes off in front of Damon if she's _ignoring _us." Caroline said with mock sadness. Bonnie's eyebrow twitched upward but her expression remained stony. I glowered at Caroline. "Or the fact that you let Damon bite you because you're into that stuff. But aren't willing to do anything because you're afraid of commitment."

"Oh my God." Bonnie turned to look at me as I flushed.

"I never said I was afraid of commitment! Stop saying that crap loudly!"

"You let him _bite _you?" Bonnie demanded, staring at me. Caroline grinned wickedly, eyes bright.

"Show her! Show her the bite mark on your shoulder!"

"Shh!" Oh my God! Why was this happening? "No! We're in—"

Bonnie shoved me into the ladies room and Caroline skipped in after us. I flailed my arms as the dark skinned girl launched herself at me, tugging at my hoodie like a possessed person! I slapped her hand away and unzipped my hoodie, shrugging my arm out and pulling down my collar a little. She and Caroline leaned closer.

"Wow." Bonnie's mouth twitched upward. "You're sick. You like pain?"

"No! I just like… You know, being bitten." I grumbled, pulling my hoodie back on. "It's complicated."

"You're not going to, like, get into the whole S&M thing, are you? Or the Dom and Sub thing?" Bonnie asked, her expression turning wickedly amused.

"How do you know about that stuff?" Caroline frowned, raising her eyebrows, while a terrible mental image of Damon being tied to the bed with me standing over him with a whip, in all leather, came to mind.

I couldn't deny that looked appealing. There was something about Damon being at my mercy that… turned me on. Maybe I just wanted complete sexual control over him. Maybe I just wanted him completely undone and begging. _GAH_!

"I read romance novels." Bonnie shrugged. "And now rated MA fanfics." What have I _done_? "So how did this happen? He just decided to bite you and discovered, whoops, it's sexy?"

"We… we've been talking dirty on the phone." I admitted sheepishly, my cheeks warming. "And this morning he sort of came into my room, since he was driving J to school, and… Well. I wanted to get dressed, and he said we shouldn't be bound by the normal rules of society or something—I mean, he didn't actually think I'd take my clothes off, but he was challenging me!" I defended as Bonnie raised her eyebrows sassily at me. "He should've known!"

"And then he said he'd eat her out!" Caroline grinned. "He'd, what did he say? Fuck you with his tongue until you only knew his name?"

"So why were you ignoring us?" I asked, loudly, ushering them out of the bathroom. Bonnie's amusement faded and she scoffed.

"You left me at the car wash! By myself! All of you!" She huffed. "What the hell? You all left me because of _boys_! What happened to chicks before dicks? I had a serious moment and I'm not telling you about it now." Bonnie paused, narrowing her eyes, while Caroline and I glanced at each other guiltily. "Where's Elena?"

"Stefan drama." Caroline dismissed and Bonnie threw her arms up.

"Way to leave me out of the loop!"

"Seriously, it was really bad and really explosive and it just happened last night," I assured her quickly. "Like Elena left in tears and didn't stop crying until she fell asleep."

"Well, what was it about?" Caroline demanded as Bonnie pulled her phone out, looking concerned and obviously texting Elena.

"Nope," I shook my head. "It's not for me to say. It doesn't help that me and Damon were making fun of them for more than half of it."

"You're such a bitch." Caroline said fondly.

* * *

Half way through lunch, I received a text message from Damon demanding that I meet him outside. For whatever reason, adult supervision and security in this school (and in this town in general) was super lax and I easily walked out of the building. Damon was looking bored as ever, leaning against his car. He straightened upon seeing me, tossing me a cheeky grin and I immediately knew _something _was up. He opened the door with a grand, sweeping, gesture.

"Get in, hummingbird. You're skipping the rest of the day."

"Only because this is my second time going to high school and I know all the material." I prodded his chest with a finger. He easily swatted it away, looking unconcerned.

"If that's what you want to tell yourself," Damon swung the door shut as I settled into the seat and flitted into the driver's side. "We both know you're just as bored as I am. If I asked you to forsake school five-ever, you'd do it." He flashed me a flirty grin and I frowned. Something wasn't up, something was _wrong_.

"What happened?" I wondered curiously.

Damon squinted his eyes at me before turning them toward the windshield, peeling out of the school parking lot fairly quickly. "How do you keep _doing _that?"

"I pay attention. You're getting overly flirty and cocky, and you're rushing me out of school. Something happened. You're basically freaking out. This is your way of freaking out. But you're Damon, so you don't want me to know you're freaking out." I was confident in knowing him enough to say that without any hesitation. Strange how a weekend away with him could make me feel completely at ease with saying anything I wanted to him.

"I killed Zach." He said awkwardly, blue eyes flickering in my direction and I stared back at him.

"You _kill _people?" I gasped. "I didn't know! Was it a drug deal gone _wrong_? I heard he supplied pot! Oh God, how will your pure conscious handle this? You've never killed anyone before!"

Damon scowled. "He found me in the basement with the vervain and freaked out, threatened to expose us. I couldn't compel him, so I snapped his neck."

"But you kill people." I reminded him, feeling confused. "Why is this an issue? And why do you keep killing off the Salvatore line?"

"Mm, the _point _of drinking gross animal blood is to remove the suspicion of vampires, Clary," Damon huffed irritably. That wasn't it. Zach didn't die by obvious vampire means. He could've said Zach had an accident. Fell down steps.

"Oh." But then Stefan would know he killed Zach. My mouth twitched upward. He _wanted _to be on good terms with Stefan. I knew it. I win. I win all the things. Damon noticed my grin and scoffed.

"Shut. Up."

"I didn't say anything." My grin twitched wider.

My confusion, however, returned when Damon stopped the car on the side of the road, in the middle of _nowhere_. Frowning, I followed him out of the car and to the trunk only to bounce backwards upon seeing the body of a guy.

"Oh my God, what the fuck!" I cried as Damon easily threw the obviously dead guy over his shoulder like a sack, shoving two shovels into my arms. I clumsily shifted them into my arms. "He's dead!" Nausea struck and I teetered, grossed out.

Damon furrowed his brow at me like I was acting strangely. "I told you I killed him."

"You pulled me out of school so I could bury a body with you?" I asked incredulously, stumbling as I followed him into the woods. "I thought you wanted me as an alibi!" I nearly tripped over the shovels.

"You've seen me kill before, calm down." Damon brushed off and I sputtered, my gaze flickering toward the body.

"Yeah but I never buried a body before! My God, he's dead. Like really, _really_, dead!" I squeaked and he stopped, turning to face me, as we stood in front of a weathered black gate with ivy spiraled around the bars. Damon's gaze held mine.

"Do you want to wait in the car?" He asked, raising his eyebrows at me and I huffed, straightening.

"I'm the kind of friend you can rely on to bury a body with." I told him seriously, my eyes sliding back to Zach. "But I'm not completely desensitized to dead people."

"You didn't know him, and he literally had no friends or other family," Damon assured me breezily, pulling open the gate. It creaked loudly and I winced, finding myself feeling reluctant to walk through. Damon turned, looking at me as I paused, standing on the other side. "Well?" He sounded impatient.

"I'm coming, I'm just—_ouch_!" I flattened down my hair, turning to give a low hanging branch an annoyed look. Straightening, lifting the shovels higher, I followed after Damon. "You'd think being a killer for so long, you wouldn't need the help burying a body."

"It goes faster and I couldn't pass up the opportunity to bond with you." Damon shot back sarcastically, grinning cheekily at me.

However, when Damon carelessly dropped Zach's dead body down on the ground next to a gravestone labeled Giuseppe Salvatore I once again understood the significance of why I was around. It might've been a hundred something years, and the guy might've killed Damon himself and was the world's shittiest dad… But he was _still _Damon's father. And Damon was someone who felt more intensely, more deeply, than anyone I've ever met. His blue gaze swept over to me, guarded and nonchalant. I merely grinned faintly, offering one of the shovels.

"You're totally taking me out to eat after this." I told him and he seemed to relax. He totally knew I figured him out. So there was no reason to say anything about it.

Two hours and three forming blisters later, the grave was all dug up and I think it was safe to say I could cross _burying a body _and _digging up a grave _off my nonexistent bucket list. Maybe I should make my 'Things I'll Never Do' list my bucket list, because when it came to Damon, I was doing everything I never thought I would. Oh well.

Damon made a noise of interest and I peered down at him, finding him pulling out what looked like a… really big book? He gently placed it onto the ground next to my feet as he stuffed Zach into the coffin with the skeleton (so creepy), and jumped out.

I waited patiently for Damon to explain as he crouched down next to the book, slowly opening it. Judging by the way his eyes lit up and the wide grin that flew across his face, this was good news.

"A book you need to read for your book club?" I asked curiously and he shot up, pulling me into his arms and spinning me around dramatically. His delight was contagious and I beamed up at him.

"This is exactly what I _need_, my Claryberry! This is Emily's stupid witch cook book!" Damon announced, nearly giddy, affectionately kissing the top of my head as he nuzzled into my hair. My cheeks warmed and my smile grew wider. "Now we just have to get Witchy to get _witchy_!" He pulled back from me before I could snuggle into his chest. Gently, he pushed the heavy, large, book into my arms. "Hold this, I'll put the dirt back into the grave."

I made myself comfortable on a stump, perfectly content with letting him do the work (my hands hurt), and curiously flipped through the large tomb of a book. None of it was written in English. Which was whatever. It was still interesting to look through. I was actually kind of excited. I mean, I was now friends with a _witch_. And I'd make sure Bonnie became one of the most kickass witches _ever_.

Damon's mood only continue to brighten, and he happily carried the grimoire and both shovels. I bounced around him, feeding off his happiness.

"Maybe we'll see what Steffy and Elena are up to," I suggested happily, reaching up to grab the handle of the gate so I could close it behind us. "We could meet up, force them to eat with us—"

The moment my fingers touched the weathered thick ring handle, a violent, excoriating, zap jolted down my arm and crackled like ice throughout my entire body. I ripped my stinging hand back with a yelp, cradling it to my chest as I stumbled backwards. My vision blurred with tears that spilled out, the pain rapidly growing. Damon was in front of me, pulling my hand to him and uncurling my frozen, shaking, fingers and I sobbed in protest, the pain nearly blinding.

"St-stop!" I tried to pull my hand back but he held on tight.

"Shit, Clary, what the hell happened?" The alarm in his voice matched the growing alarm inside of me as I stared down at the black imprint of the handle on my palm.

"I d-don't k-know," I stammered, the painful icy feeling spreading across my chest and slowly moving throughout me. "I t-t-touched it a-and… and…"

Everything felt strange, a sort of thick haze hanging around me like a fog, dense and weighing everything down. It was like I had stumbled into a swarm of bees, all buzzing angrily, loudly, so I couldn't _think_. I could scarcely see through it all, every blink a fight to push my eyelids back up as the biting sting of sleep clawed at their lids. The hazy fog clogged my brain, leaving my mind uncomfortably blank—every thought that stuttered by like a seizing butterfly I desperately threw myself at trying to cling to it, only for it to break into nothing.

Reality blurred in and out of a surreal dream like state.

"_Clarissa_! Shit, Clarissa, wake up!"

Someone was shaking me—and I forced my eyes open, staring upward at Damon. When had I shut my eyes? And why was he shaking me? Exhaustion crushed and squeezed so terribly that I wanted to cry. I just wanted to _sleep_.

"Sorry," words fell like rocks awkwardly from my mouth.

"You gotta stay awake, okay, Clary? You have to stay awake. I don't know what's _wrong _with you, your heart keeps stopping—Clarissa, _damn it_, just stay awake."

"Silly, am always alright." Dark spots. Dizziness tilted the world almost painfully with blurred colors that sped by. "Always." I fought to cling onto the conversation, drowsiness making my mind slip, making it so it was difficult to remember the topic.

_Pain_. Suddenly pain. It flickered through the icy numbness. I choked and cringed as a sharp pain dragged like ice shards across my diaphragm, my lungs, my ribs, felt like someone had kicked them. It was restrictive, like I wasn't use to breathing. I couldn't get air back into my body and I choked again, choked on something. I was _drowning_. Drowning in icy water. And then the world jerked sideways, throwing me into a dizzy pain, dark spots almost blinding me. I leaned forward, fingertips gripping what felt like the leather seat in Damon's car, curling, trying to grasp reality as the world blurred.

His words slurred. Confusion. Exhaustion. Darkness.

* * *

Damon wasn't sure how long he sat frozen in a state of horrified shock, holding Clarissa's frighteningly still, cold and limp, tiny body to him. He had lost track of how many times her heart had stopped and fluttered back to life weakly only to stop soon after. She had died and came back and then died again so quickly, so violently, it seemed like it was never going to end.

Why wouldn't she _wake _up? She always woke up. Always. Damon stared down at her, listening desperately for her heart to stutter back to life, for the sharp intake of breath, but all he was met with was a sickening silence.

"Clary?"

It'd been, what? Ten minutes since he'd rushed her up to his room after driving frantically? Ten minutes since she stopped having a fit and became still? Why wasn't she coming back to life? Damon sat patiently, holding his birdhouse. She was going to wake up because she wouldn't leave him. Not like this. _Not like this_. She couldn't. No, she would stir back to life, because she _had _to, because he needed her to, because she always did.

Damon loathed feeling helpless. He despised it. The fact that all he could do was pathetically watch as she died and woke and convulsed and _vomited blood _left a bitter ache in his chest. Was that all he was good for? Watching her die over and over again? He knew what the dark, nearly black, blood meant. She had been bleeding internally. Her organs had _failed_ her. And the sweet intoxicating scent had hit his senses, forcing his fangs to slide out against his will, pulsing with an ache that made Damon hate himself. Because this was his _birdhouse_.

He needed her to wake up or this agony would consume him, break him.

They were now reaching thirty minutes. _Thirty minutes _in which Clarissa was cold and still.

Feeling a nauseated fear swarming, he frantically listened for a heartbeat.

She's been dead before, he assured himself. There was nothing to worry about.

But what if she wasn't going to wake up…? What if… Damon stared down at Clarissa, blankly. Hadn't this been what he wanted, in a sense? Remove Clarissa, and nothing would stand between him and uncomplicated happiness. He wouldn't _have _to worry about Elijah or nightlights or even sealing up the tomb. With Clarissa no longer being around, he didn't have to worry about his rising, conflicted, feelings for her and he wouldn't have to worry about hurting her when he left. He could be with Katherine.

He deserved to be with Katherine.

He deserved to be finally happy.

He finally had everything, _everything_, he needed to retrieve Katherine. He had Emily's necklace, he had Emily's witchy cook book. So, naturally, the tradeoff would be _Clarissa_.

Staring down at his little birdhouse, Damon felt something inside of him crack.

"I choose you," he whispered desperately to his Clarissa, trying to coax her into waking. "I'll stay here with you. I'll free her, because I… I couldn't—because I… But I'll stay. I'll stay until you don't… don't _want _me, need me, anymore. I'll _stay_, Clary. Please, Clary. _Please _wake up. I pick you. I pick _you_."

He was choking, suffocating in this horrified grief that slammed into him. Damon curled, shaking, the pain shattering through his chest like splintered wood shards. He clung to her.

"Clary, Clary," a numbing ache spread through him. Everything _hurt_. "The whole universe bent so you'd come to me, I need you, I can't… Can't do this, I can't—I need you and I'll do anything, _anything_, you want, just wake up."

He cradled her to him, burying his face in the crook of her neck.

"No, no, no, no," he moaned miserably. He was spiraling. "Don't leave me like this. I don't want to do this without you. I won't make it. This will end me. You made everything better, I was so _happy_. How could I ever leave you? My Clary, my birdhouse, my hummingbird? Clarissa…" he choked, clinging, as the pain shattered brutally. "Oh God, Clarissa. _No_, no. Don't. Please. Please come back to me. Oh God, Clarissa, please."

He stroked her cold, bloodied, face soothingly. She'd wake up. She had to. She couldn't leave him. She'd never leave him. Never. She would wake up for him.

She _would_.

She had to.

Because she needed him too.

"No, no, no, don't leave me here. Don't leave me here. I need you. Please. I'll never leave your side, I'll never hurt you again. I'll never hurt you again, God, please Clarissa, I need you." He begged softly. "I won't leave you, I swear, I promise, it'll be us, forever and ever and ever please don't leave me. I need you, please Clary, please. I'm nothing without you. No, no, you can't do this to me. You can't make me happy, you can't make everything better, you can't do this to me and then leave me like this, I can't… I can't… There is only you, only you, you come first, I swear. Only you. I don't care. I'll give everything up for you."

Damon didn't know if he was sobbing or laughing, feeling half crazed with grief and self-loathing.

"I can't even fucking _feed_," he sounded hysterical. "Without _thinking _of you. Offering me a napkin. How do you expect me to… to go on from this? Come _back _to me. I'll… I'll _never _forgive you if you do this to me! _Never_! Damn it, Clary! You can't. Not you. _Not you_. Fuck, you'll end me! Is that what you _want_? Don't—oh God, Clarissa—no. _No_. No, no, no, not you, please God, not you. I can't do this without you, I don't _want _to! I can't be here without you! Come back, please, please, Clarissa, please. You can have me! All of me!"

He felt wild and frantic. She was so cold. So, so, cold. He needed to warm her up. How could he leave her cold like this? Clarissa was so lively, so warm, so bright. Carefully, he scooped her into his arms more comfortably and flitted toward the shower. What had that damn bartender said about hummingbirds? Their hearts stop in the cold, right? She just needed to get warm. Clarissa would be okay once she warmed back up. She would. He'd take care of her. Everything was going to be _fine_.

He tore her bloodied hoodie and shirt from her, throwing it as far as he could away from her. He didn't want the offending pieces of clothing to defile her anymore, he had to get this blood off her. She couldn't wake up with blood on her! It would scare her, and he needed her to be calm, and okay, and alive. Alive and undamaged. Damon cradled Clarissa to his chest, throwing the knob to the side. The water sprang out immediately. He'd warm her up. That's all she needed.

"Clarissa," he soothed. "It's alright. I'm here now. You're okay, you're _okay_… I'll get the blood off you…" Propping her up against him, he tested the temperature with his free hand. "Don't worry, Clary," he cooed to her softly. "I took your shirt off, but it was _completely _platonic."

Deciding the water was warm enough for his little birdhouse, he gently settled her in his lap directly under the shower head. Desperation was seeping back in.

"I'll make it better. When you feel better, we'll do whatever you want. Whatever you want." He promised softly, scrubbing the blood from her pale skin. He couldn't stand the sight of it, couldn't stand the idea of it. He had to get it all off her.

It hadn't been _enough_. Agony crunched through him and he moaned softly, shutting his eyes tightly. He hadn't had enough time with her. Clarissa's beaming, twinkling, smile and mischievous sea glass eyes flickered through his mind. He had so carelessly _killed _her, more than once, and the thought now made him feel violently sick. He had pushed her down, pulled her hair, _laughed _when she'd hurt herself. He didn't deserve a single moment with her and the realization that he could never show her how much she'd come to mean to him left him aching. He wanted to die. She'd filled him with a happiness he never knew before, she had adored him, cherished him. He could still remember the way her blood sung sweetly inside him. …How could he have ever considered leaving her?

He hadn't _understood _why kissing was so special to her until she kissed him with such a bruising tenderness that his entire being fluttered. He hadn't known such a simple, chaste, kiss could _ever _be like that. It stole all the air from his body and made him foolishly happy. In that single moment, he had wanted to spend an eternity cherishing every inch of her, a thousand years to slowly move his mouth across her entire body, and then another to simply admire her. He had so willingly died for Katherine, but Clarissa brought him back to life.

And now? He would free Katherine, yes, because she deserved that much. But there was no going back from Clarissa, even if she had chosen to be mortal, even if they had never become anything more than friends. Clarissa had shown him what _true _happiness was like, and there was simply no going back to being second, there was no going back to anything Katherine had given him. Katherine tore him and Stefan apart, had done so much _damage_. It didn't matter if he was still in love with her. He wasn't going to miserably, angrily, exist for her anymore.

"Like Disney, then, Clarissa?" Damon begged quietly, desperate for anything. He pushed damp locks of hair from her face, tenderly stroking her cold, wet, cheek. "Just come back, come back…" He gently pressed his mouth against hers.

_Thump_.

Damon snapped his head back as shock flew across his anguished face.

_Thump… thump_.

It was faint, but Clarissa's heart was stirring in her chest and Damon doubted he'd ever hear anything more wonderful the rest of his existence. The louder, more steady, her heartbeat became the warmer Damon felt. It spread through the cold numbness and he clung to her feeling a crazy desperation to never leave her side ever again. She came back for him. He kissed her and she _came back_.

"Oh God, I believe," he breathed, staring down at her as she stirred, choking on air. Relief hit him so violently he felt like laughing. "I believe, I believe, I believe." He kissed her and she _came back to him_. He believed in her stupid Disney crap, fuck, he _believed_.

She moaned weakly, a sob in her throat, her fingers twitching against him. Her blue-gray eyes fluttered and she stared at him in hazy confusion.

Damon couldn't take it anymore. He kissed her hard, pulling her flush against him, needing her familiar touch and taste just to consume him for a little while. He needed to lose himself inside Clarissa for a few horribly selfish stolen moments, he needed her to surround and override every sense, to make it all better. Everything was raw, the misery of thinking she was dead had pierced him terribly and he just _needed her_. She kissed him back just as desperately, her fingers clawing at his drenched shirt, pulling at his damp hair, clinging to him. Needing him just as he needed her. He grabbed every inch of her that he could, his soaked skin pleadingly seeking hers, needing the way she made him feel wash over him. Damon moaned into her sweet mouth and pressed his fingertips into her skin with an almost bruising grip. He needed her closer, it wasn't enough. It wasn't _enough_.

A searing burning sliced against his skin and he hissed, pulling back, his fangs sliding out. Dazed, dizzy, he realized he accidentally brushed against that damned vervain saturated necklace. Clarissa leaned back against the wall of his shower, eyes wide, her cheeks still too pale. She looked too tiny, too fragile, her dark hair matted and soaked, hanging limply.

"I died," she slurred incredulously, pulling her knees to her chest and hugging them, seemingly oblivious to the fact that they had just made out. "Lived in New fuckin' York for twenty years, never got mugged or shot or anything. Live in a small fictional hick town for a month, constantly being killed. That's all I do here. I die." Never again. Never, ever, again. "I was killed by what? Metal? What the fuck?"

"Iron," Damon breathed, still in a state of shock. She was _alive_. She was _here_. She was talking, breathing, _living_. He was reeling, he could hardly believe it. "It was made out of wrought iron. I… I guess… whatever you are… doesn't like iron." Clarissa stared at him, her expression void of any emotion. But there was a fear lingering in her gaze.

"Do you think I need to get a tetanus shot?" Clarissa deadpanned after a moment, her voice flat. "At least flowers don't give me burns." Damon released a half hysterical laugh and a faint smile moved across her pale face. "Help me up? I'm feeling a little…"

He was easily lifting her to her feet before she could even finish her sentence.

* * *

I sat, distracted, on Damon's bed, bundled up in a large fluffy towel in only my underwear. Somewhere between the shower, and the bed, Damon had convinced me to take my pants off. Since they were soaked. It was almost funny, this was the second time today I was almost naked only now I was in his bed and nothing at all about this was sexual. I wasn't in pain anymore, but I still vividly remembered it. It creaked through me, touching every part of me hauntingly. And while I wasn't freezing anymore either, there was a chill that clung to me. I didn't understand why this death left me feeling frightened and shaky. I've _died _before and more than that, I've been _murdered_. So why was this so… different?

But the worst of it was the frustration that coursed through me. I uncurled my fingers, staring down at my now smooth palm. I could still remember the jolt that had shattered through me. It was almost like it was still brimming under the surface, waiting to burst open and drag me back into that terrible nightmare. Damon had explained what had happened in horrifying detail and it just left me feeling more lost, in need for answers.

What _was _I? And how easily would I be able to find out? There was so _much _to research, so much that I _needed _to know, and my head felt like it was about to split open with all the rushed, demanding, questions. Why had I died so violently? Why did I die and continue to come back only to stay dead? Was it because of the gate? Was it like an extreme allergic reaction? Was it like Damon's vervain? I doubted I was going to be very willing to risk a trial run in which I touch a bunch of stuff made out of iron to see the reaction, but it was killing me to be left with so many stupid questions.

Frustrated, I sighed, and tilted my gaze toward Damon. He was standing next to an open drawer, staring down at the contents blankly. I was tired of being upset and confused and annoyed about this whole _violently killed_, _what am I_, thought process that circled and circled and circled around in my head. Sliding off his bed, I dropped the towel carelessly to the ground and drifted toward him. Immediately, Damon stirred back into awareness, his blue eyes flinging in my direction.

"Get back into my bed." He demanded, head tilting, and my lips curved upward. Damon's blue eyes narrowed at me. "You're still in the process of healing." Apparently that meant he wasn't going to take any of my shit.

"But this is getting so boring," I sighed, moodily plucking at the hem of his drenched shirt and slowly peeling it from his skin.

"Mm, yes, I _forget_. Violently dying over and over again for reasons yet unexplained tends to get a bit tedious." Damon shot back scathingly and I let his anger roll over me, completely unfazed. He wasn't pissed off at _me_. "Maybe we should go leap off a tall building to up the thrill factor. It doesn't matter, right? Since we'll both _be fine_!" He shoved a black shirt that smell of him over my head. It reached midway down my thighs.

"You still owe me for helping you bury Zach and getting blisters on my palms." I teased playfully, slipping my hands under his shirt.

He shivered as my fingertips slid over his warm, slick, skin and I found myself growing warmer at the contact, the chill slowly fading from my damp skin. Damon's blue eyes tangled with mine, clinging to me, as I continued to lightly move my hand over his skin, a rush of delight twinkling through me. All at once, I felt better, _happier_, and _so_ much warmer. Like Damon was the sun peeking through the clouds after being stuck in chilly rain. His entire demeanor changed almost instantly and he relaxed completely under my touch. Lightly, I stroked the damp fuzz that trailed up his navel. I _swear _the light rumbling in his chest was him _purring_.

Like a cat.

"And what would you like me to do for you, Clarissa?" Damon murmured, his half lidded gaze glowing. He snaked an arm around my waist, drawing me closer. "Or _to _you?"

I stared up at him. It was suddenly so very clear. "No matter what I do or say or promise myself, we're going to end up like this." I realized with a faint laugh. Damon blinked at me, his flirty smirk falling into a confused frown. He knotted his brow. "Maybe we should just make a game out of it."

"A game out of _what_?" He demanded as I began to pull back from him. Damon's arm tightened, keeping me close to him and my cheeks warmed.

"If it's a game I won't feel like I have no self-control, if it's a game then I won't feel like this is… this is _wrong_, when it's clearly unavoidable. It's just so consuming." I continued softly and he growled.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Damon said impatiently, squinting his blue eyes at me.

"This. The sexual tension. The fact that no matter what we do, it always comes back to this." I shifted a shoulder upward and Damon stared at me. "Let's just turn it into a game."

Surprise flickered across his face. "_What_?"

I grinned wickedly at him, excitement growing. I was a freakin' genius. "It'd keep things interesting _and _it'd keep us from tearing our clothes off due to sexual frustration. If it's gonna be happening either way, I'd rather have it under my terms and the ability to profit from it."

"Rules." Damon demanded immediately, clearly liking my idea if the mischievous glint in his gaze was anything to go by.

"Anything goes, the object is to make the other lose control first. For me, that's me losing all control and kissing you. For you, that's you vamping out. So that means kissing and biting is out, unless you're willing to lose. Whoever wins gets to ask the loser to do something. Anything."

"_Anything_?" Damon repeated, raising his eyebrows as a dark smile curled across his face.

"Well… Not sex. Anything and everything but sex."

I didn't care if that meant Damon could ask me to walk around in public completely naked. If I was going to be stuck living some weird supernatural life with murderous vampires stalking me and iron causing me to die, then I should at least have a lot of fun with this sexual tension shit. I didn't care if that meant my emotions may or may not get thrown into the mix, I didn't care if that meant I'd burn later. I wouldn't let this control me, or dictate anything. _And _it could be really fun.

"How long will this game last for? After a certain amount of wins… or indefinitely?" Damon's voice was becoming huskier after each word, his gaze darkening as he stared down at me.

"Indefinitely unless we agree to call it quits."

I hadn't realized Damon was backing me up until he pushed me over and onto his bed. I flailed, bouncing a little. My heart stuttered inside my chest as he crawled over me, a frighteningly dark smirk splashed across his face, his devouring blue eyes glowing with rapacious hunger.

"No kissing, and no penetrating biting," Damon agreed in a low, growling, voice with his predatory grin. "But nibbling without fangs should be acceptable." A shiver wracked my body, causing his smirk to grow dangerously.

"Okay," I breathed and he chuckled lowly, dipping his pulsing hot fingertips under my shirt and brushing them lightly up my side. My cheeks warmed as the familiar hiss of desire coiled around me.

"Oh _Clary_, you _have no idea _what you're in for," Damon purred lowly. Two seconds into this, and I'm already losing.

This is such crap.

Huffing, I ran my fingers through his hair, lightly scraping my nails against his scalp. He made a soft noise of pleasure, a look of bliss flickering across his expression. Giddiness stole through me causing my grin to grow. He _liked _this and I wasn't sure why that made me ridiculously happy.

Damon let his head drop onto my chest, his arms curling around me, as he fully laid on top of me instead of hovering and I squeaked at the sudden weight pressing into me. It was a little uncomfortable, but I found that I didn't care, and happily continued to run my fingers through his silky hair.

* * *

so I totally was going to end this right after Clarissa died. and then I was going to end this right after she woke up. but I thought I'd leave you guys without any cliffhangers because **apparently i'm moving today.** A lot of crazy shit went down last night. Story short: a lot of terrible life decision were made, $3500 worth of terrible decisions that we now owe to the landlord, my roommate is back in the hospital and I have three days to move all our shit out of the apartment. happy 4th of july TO ME. The GOOD news is we're gonna be moving into a townhouse with five other people, so now instead of paying 900 dollars (and my half of utilities/electric/internet), I only have to pay 400 dollars a month. Yay. The DOWNSIDE is I don't know when I'll be able to buy a wireless adapter for my computer. **It might take a few weeks**. So I obviously wanted to rush this out to you guys.

i don't have much time, as i have to start moving shit asap, but i just wanted to quickly say a few things about this chapter.  
1) I know a few of you were hoping that Clarissa would be invincible, sorry! All supernatural creatures have a weakness to balance out nature. It's unavoidable. And I'm pretty sure some of you are totally gonna know what Clarissa's deal is now.  
2) I wanted Damon to consciously choose Clarissa before finding out Katherine isn't in the tomb instead of being like "KATHERINE WTF o well I have u Clary lol".  
3) Damon-Stefan. There is so much wrong with their relationship and rewatching the earlier episodes of season 1, it's like, they obviously want to be brothers again and there's so much hurt and nobody to help them heal their relationship. I'm not saying they're gonna be BFF in the next few chapters, but we'll get them there.

I know it jumped from 'omg angst' to 'playful sexual tension' crap, but i really didn't wanna leave you guys with serious things and i didn't have time to continue writing this chapter out as planned. Anyway, for those living in the USA, have a safe and happy 4th of July, and for everyone else, have a great few weeks, see you guys soon, thanks so much for reading and reviewing! Wish me luck!


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: Noooothing, I own noooothing.

Christ it's been hectic! Big thank you to my roommate who got me a wi-fi adapter! And another huge thank you to everyone's kind words and understanding about the whole move thing. I'm still getting settled in, but I finally have cable after what feels like so long going without! It's fantastic.

To the people reading who absolutely hate Clarissa/think she's too much of a bitch to continue, I'm sorry! I know what it's like to not being able to continue to read something because of the main character, but I DO have a recommendation for a FANTASTIC Damon/OC fic!** JackieOh's _Her Diamonds_** will knock your socks off, she's an amazingly talented writer and her stories are to die for! I seriously suggest checking it out! :D

This chapter is heavily **rated F** for HOLY SHIT I WENT A LITTLE CRAZY WITH THE FLUFF. With all the craziness in real life I just wanted to OD on fluff.

* * *

"It's not too late," Jeremy said in a low, tense, voice, his grip on my arm like a vine. "There is no shame in running. Nobody would blame us. We'll come back, with Damon."

I drew a deep breath to calm myself, my gaze fixed on the numbers that signified what floor we were on, gradually going upward. There was even that cheesy elevator music playing which somehow made all this feel a lot more creepier. Dread built up in my stomach. This was such a bad idea and it was all my fault.

"No," I whispered back, firmly. "We have to, J. It's… the best thing to do."

Jeremy's uneasy gaze flashed in my direction as the elevator slowed, his eyes widening as panic dashed across his face. "Please, C, let's just… Just go back down, let's just _leave_! If we come back with Damon, he'll ensure that—"

The elevator dinged and the doors whooshed open. Elena moved between us, looking determinedly straight ahead. "Damon isn't compelling our therapist," she said with an irritated huff, shoving us forward into the quiet waiting room.

Jeremy and I flailed, stumbling into the room, as Jenna pushed past us and over to the receptionist that sat behind a wall of glass. Only twenty minutes ago I had been in _The Cuddle Session _(as I was calling it) with Damon. Now I was in a waiting room to see a therapist. A therapist, who, if any good, would undoubtedly pick up on my mommy issues and then we'd have a serious problem as _this _Clarissa (from what I gathered) was pretty close to her parents. I was a walking time bomb of mental issues that would never receive closure or a way to work itself out as I was in a new world and body. I was every therapist's wet dream. I was a slew of problems stitched together under the pretense that everything was peachy and fantastic. And now I had another set on top of my old ones. The trauma of being killed by iron still lingered under the surface and the mindboggling possibilities for how I _got _here could probably be considered traumatic too.

But I had to suck it up and brave the therapy, because this family _needed _it. They seriously, really, needed it. Feigning boredom, I plopped down next to Elena. I was never any good at sitting quietly. Silent waiting rooms were my personal hell.

"So…" I began, my voice sounding loud in the quite room. There wasn't even music playing softly. "How'd it go with you and Steffy?" Elena's dark eyes softened a little, which I took as a good sign.

"I'm going to give him a chance. No secrets this time. I'm still… I just don't… I mean, he's…" she trailed off, fumbling with what to say, looking so very lost. I took her hand in mine, wanting to encourage her.

"He's still Stefan." I reminded her. "Everything you like about him, everything that frustrates you about him, everything that he is—he's _Stefan_. And he's a pretty good guy. Probably one of the best." Which made him terribly boring.

"Yeah," Jeremy agreed, throwing himself down on Elena's other side. "Don't discriminate, Lena. You're being such a species-ist." His gaze caught mine and I suddenly realized what he was doing.

"_What_!" Elena whispered with horrified distress, her cheeks tinged with pink. "No I'm not!" I smothered a grin as Jeremy fixed her with a disappointed look, shaking his head.

"I don't know Elena… I think J's right. Suddenly you have a problem with him." I agreed with a sigh. Her head flew in my direction.

"But he's… He's…!" She fumbled quietly. Her eyes went wide. "He _lied_ to me, he _hid_ things from me!"

"Well, yeah, look at how you're reacting. He wanted to give you time to get to know _him_, and not see him for what the media says he's like. Just because Damon goes around acting that way, doesn't mean they all do. That's stereotyping." Jeremy shrugged his shoulders and Elena pouted just as Jenna sat down on the other side of me, paperwork in hand.

Given that Jenna was now here, the vampire talk had to stop, and I wondered why we were keeping this from her. Especially since Elijah was going to be a potential problem in the future. She _was _a main character, too, so didn't that mean she was going to find out anyway? Why shouldn't we just, I dunno, speed that up? The best way to be well protected against crazy vampires was to be in the know. Ignorance is never bliss. What you didn't know was still going to hurt you. And it would help keep this family together. Secrets only drove people apart. That, and I was sure, somewhere along the line, Damon and I would fuck up and do some Vampire Dickery in front of her.

Waiting is always hell.

Especially with how freakin' quiet this waiting room was.

I pulled my phone out, scrolling through the texts Noah sent (it was like she liveblogged her entire day to me every second at a time), grinned upon seeing a text from Olivia and frowned when I realized Caroline _still _hadn't responded to me. It's been like fifteen minutes since I told her the latest gossip on my disturbed sexual life. Feeling miffed, I sent her another text. And had to wait _three _minutes before I got a reply.

Caroline: _she is busy. But I will have her text you later_.

What the _hell_? Serious points off to James, but then, I figured, maybe they were doing sexy things and James didn't want her texting away. I guess I could understand. Whatever. Annoyed, I bitched to Noah about having to be in therapy instead.

"Gilberts?"

I lifted my head, eyeing a fairly young looking man standing in the doorway, a warm smile on his face. Jeremy groaned as Elena smiled back at who I assumed was our therapist as she ushered us upward.

"Dr. Heymans?" Elena asked warmly, nearly dragging Jeremy and I across the room. "I'm Elena, this is my twin Clarissa and our younger brother Jeremy. Thank you for seeing us." I wiggled my fingers in greeting while Jeremy merely stared moodily.

"Actually, I'm Scott," the guy said sheepishly. "Dr. Heymans is our psychologist and before you can see him, you're required to have at least three sessions with one of the therapists here. We, uh, don't like to just stick medications on people."

Way to go, Elena.

"_Oh_." Elena flushed prettily. "Um, no, we're not looking to be _medicated_." Her gaze tilted toward Jeremy in an almost accusing way and he scowled back at her. And so it begins. "I'm not really sure how this works… I was sort of hoping to just have someone to help our family."

Scott grinned. "And I'm sure we'll be able to help. But for today, we're doing an… evaluation, of sorts. Are either of you over the age eighteen?" Scott glanced between Elena and I. We shook our heads. "Okay, then, Ma'am?" He looked over our shoulders and Jenna's head shot up. "You're going to have to sit in on this session. You can bring the paperwork."

"Seeing as Jenna is _a part _of this dysfunction, she should be coming with us for every session." I said causing Jenna to throw me a look. Burn with us, Jenna. Burn.

"Yeah. No. Me and therapy? Not happening again." Jenna huffed, fumbling to carry the paperwork and her bag, as we followed Scott down a hallway.

"Aunt Jenna, if we have to suffer through forty-five minutes of Elena time, then so do you." Jeremy sulked. Aw.

"It's not going to be about _me_." Elena swatted Jeremy's arm. "We have serious problems. And Clare is right. Jenna should be here with us."

"_Serious _problems?" I snorted, amusement rising as I quickly texted Noah back. "We don't have _serious _problems. I think we're pretty alright, considering. It could be so much worse. And look, here we all are, in therapy, like you want. So we can't be that bad if we're all agreeing to do this. You know who _should _be in family therapy? Damon and Stefan."

Jeremy broke out laughing as Scott threw open a door, wincing as it slammed against the wall, and gestured for us to enter the small office. It wasn't at all what I was expecting, it was more relaxed. There was a beat up looking brown couch against the wall and two comforting looking chairs next to it. Elena sat between Jeremy and I on the couch, while Jenna took the chair next to me. Scott shut the door and sat in a swirling leather computer chair.

Silence filled the room.

My phone buzzed and I went to reach for it when Elena slapped my hand.

I puffed out a breath of air.

Jenna began humming, her pen making scratching sounds against the paperwork. Jeremy tapped his fingers against the arm of the couch. I shifted. And then shifted in a different direction. My fingers danced across my leg like I was playing the piano and I tapped my foot along with the imaginary beat. Oh my _GOD_.

"What's the diagnosis, Crane?" I demanded.

"Christ, C, Crane wasn't actually a therapist or anything. That was only Nolan's version. Crane was a professor." Jeremy huffed and I shushed him loudly.

"My name is _Scott_," our therapist was amused rather than annoyed. I wondered how long it'd take for him to get upset and decide we needed a new therapist. I wondered if he'd throw us out. It was now my goal.

"Scott is a hideous name." I shrugged as Jenna and Elena both gave me identical looks of annoyance. I merely smiled. "But you can pick between Crane or Scarebear."

"I'm really sorry," Elena began apologizing and I rolled my eyes at Jeremy who snorted. "She's nervous. She gets really…"

"Bitchy?" I offered sweetly, Scott raising his eyebrows at my _naughty _language. "Ignore Elena, I'm not nervous! This is how I am naturally, she's just ashamed of me!"

"I'm not ashamed of you!" Elena cried, smacking my arm pretty hard. "Now behave!" Nope!

Scott leaned back in the chair, which squeaked loudly, and twirled a pen between his slender fingers, brown eyes calmly drifting across my face. I rose my eyebrows back at him, challengingly. Like, this is what he's going to be in for if he decides to take this family on.

"You're testing me," Scott said, amused, and I wondered, why I couldn't just come across someone who would take me seriously and not be amused. "You're _trying _to be as outrageous and offensive as possible, it's a defense mechanism."

"Ooh, you get that off a wiki page?" Jeremy wondered sarcastically as I openly frowned at Scott. Defense mechanism my _ass_!

"_Jeremy_!" Elena scolded.

"You don't want anyone close to you and given the ease in which you decided to rename me, and the unfazed reaction from your family, suggests you do that often. Perhaps to dissociate yourself, to make everyone and everything around you less _real_. Your sarcasm and confrontational _bitchiness _is used as a distraction, to deflect, to keep people from knowing _you_."

Did the therapist just call me a bitch? I mean, yeah, I called myself one, but he's a _therapist_! Was he allowed to do that? I tried to be offended, but that was kind of… Cool.

"Then we have Elena, who immediately starts apologizing for your behavior. It would appear that she feels that she needs to take responsibility for everyone, putting the fault onto herself. From the few minutes of watching you three converse, Elena appears to be trying to take the role of _parent_. There's also guilt on her face, and given the absence of actual parents and the fact that an aunt is here, I'm thinking your parents have recently left the picture. She clearly feels responsible for whatever happened and that's fueling her need to take charge. She feels like she's lost control, and the only way to gain that back, is to _be _in control of everything."

Jeremy and I glanced at each other. So maybe this guy wasn't a quack.

"Considering Jeremy's open dislike for me, I'd say he's been struggling the hardest with whatever you have been going through. Death of your parents, I'm guessing. And given the look Elena gave him at the mention of medication, I'm assuming in order to deal with their loss he was abusing drugs as a way to escape. But given that he's here with you two, I say that he's ready to accept whatever it'll take to move past the grieving process. He wants things to be better, but he doesn't want a stranger to judge. Which brings us to you, Jenna…"

Jenna looked up with surprise. "Me?"

Scott grinned at her faintly. "You look frazzled, out of place. I'm thinking the role of parental guardian was thrust upon you suddenly, especially since it seems that you'd rather be the cool aunt rather than a parent. You let Elena take responsibility. But she's a teenager, and you need to let her be one. She's not emotionally mature enough nor in a position to take care of Clarissa and Jeremy. Those two are only going to act out more. It's time for you to step up, create rules and boundaries and reinforce punishment when they misbehave. They won't hate you for it, and it'll help bring some normalcy back to your family. Children crave structure. They need it."

A stunned silence fell over us, and I felt a sliver of respect grow for this therapist. Scott raised his eyebrows innocently at me.

"Did I pass the test?"

My mouth twitched. "I'm still gonna call you Crane."

The rest of session went by fairly positively, with me somewhat behaving. It wasn't what I was expecting at all, either. He asked us what we expected out of therapy, we told him about the deaths of our parents, he had us set up three goals we wanted to achieve by the end of therapy, asked about any previous mental illness in the family (apparently the Gilberts have been total nutjobs since the 1800s pfft wonder why). By the end of it, Elena set up another session in a few weeks with Scott (I refused to see any other therapist as Scott won my respect).

The car ride back home was quiet in a good kind of way, and I had texted Damon, letting him know that he and Stefan had to meet us there. If Damon objected to my want to include Jenna in the whole vampire thing, he didn't say anything. I was half worried that Damon was going to become overly agreeable because he was still a little tweaked over the whole iron and violent death thing.

"Scott is right," Jenna said suddenly, her voice tight. "I… I do have to step up."

"I think you'll do a good job," Jeremy said with a shrug, turning away from the window. "It'll be cool."

"Yup." I agreed cheerfully. "You gotta have more faith in yourself. You can ground us, it's okay."

"Yeah." Elena smiled softly. "Take charge, Aunt Jenna! Ground Clare for leaving school early!"

"Ground Elena for skipping!" I added in a singsong.

"You're both grounded!" Jenna said happily. Wait. Seriously? "You're homebound for the weekend and no going out after school! Wow, that felt good!"

Jeremy clapped happily. "Great job! I'm proud of you!"

Elena and I frowned, glancing at each other. Well, shit.

"Okay." I accepted with a nod.

"You know what's best, Jenna." Elena agreed.

Jenna visibly relaxed a little.

"Just, before you ground us, Damon and Stefan are coming over 'cause I need to talk to you about something—" Jenna slammed on the brakes causing me to tumble into Elena.

"Oh my God, you're pregnant!" Jenna wailed, whipping her head around to stare at me with wide eyes as I untangled myself from Elena, who was undoubtedly going to bitch at me for not wearing a seatbelt. I blinked owlishly at Jenna. Wait. _WHAT?_ "I've already failed you! Oh my _GOD_!"

"How would I have gotten pregnant?" I just felt so confused. Jeremy immediately burst into loud laughter as Jenna went scarlet. Elena groaned and buried her face in her palms. I flushed. "No, I know what—what has to be done in order to _get _pregnant! I know that! But _how_—Damon and I—we're not… Not like…" I trailed off and raised my hands, making a circle with one and slowly inserting my pointer into it.

Elena smacked my hand down as Jenna stared at me like she couldn't believe what she was seeing. Jeremy was just howling. I slumped down in the backseat, my cheeks quickly growing warmer. Goddamn it.

Damon and Stefan were waiting for us on the porch, and judging by Stefan's tense expression Damon had at least let him know what I was planning on doing. Green eyes flickered in my direction almost as though he could mentally will me to change my mind. I mean, he could, but Stefan wasn't that kind of guy. And I was pretty sure the necklace Jeremy gave me was covered with vervain.

"Wait," Elena said lowly, grabbing my arm as Jenna walked ahead to greet the Salvatore brothers. "We're—you're going to tell Jenna?"

"This family can't afford to keep secrets from each other." I murmured quietly, surprised to see the hesitance brimming in Elena's dark eyes. I furrowed my brow. "Wouldn't you want her to know? You didn't like the fact that J and I knew without you."

"I…" Elena shifted, looking uncomfortable. "I don't want to drag her into this."

"The best way to protect someone is for them to know everything." Jeremy slung an arm over my shoulders. "And there's a lot you and Jenna have to know."

Like _Elijah_. I shared a look with my younger brother, the grim reality settling over my mood. I had no doubt that Elijah would be making a reappearance very soon. We had to be ready for him when he did.

Though, I was pleasantly surprised to see Elena greeted Stefan with a quick kiss, which seemed to ease the poor guy a little. A silly, almost dazed, smile spread across his face as Elena led him into the house by hand, Jenna raising her eyebrows at me, Damon and Jeremy before following in. Damon tilted his blue eyes in our direction and I found myself craving to be closer to him, suddenly feeling like I needed to touch him, like I needed his reassurance.

"What are we going to tell them?" Jeremy asked curiously.

"Vampires, Elijah, my inability to die?" I offered. I didn't know Jenna well enough to predict what kind of reaction she was going to have, and my stomach lit with fluttering nerves. Goddamn. "Is that okay, D?"

"The worst that can happen is she freaks out and the town hunts us down." Damon shrugged indifferently, looking completely unconcerned by the whole thing. I released a nervous breath of air. Way to be that guy, Damon. Making me more friggin' nervous.

"It'll be alright, C." Jeremy lightly pushed me into the kitchen where Elena and Stefan were sitting at the table awkwardly under Jenna suspicious gaze. She was leaning against the island. "Maybe I should make popcorn."

Damon shoved Jeremy into one of the chairs.

And then suddenly everyone's gaze was on me. I shifted my weight from foot to foot, awkwardly. I really had no idea what to _say_. I guess I could wing it.

"Uh… So… You know how I was totally, uh… suicidal?" I winced as my siblings and Jenna flinched, Stefan's green eyes snapping in my direction and widening. "Well… there's… You know, a little more to the story. See, when I said Damon helped me realize I wanted to be here, and stuff…" I trailed off, my cheeks warming at their intense staring. Shrugging awkwardly, I pretended to snap an invisible neck in front of me, making a crunching sound with my mouth.

"Hopefully Damon won't feel the need to demonstrate." Jeremy intoned sarcastically causing the dark haired vampire hovering next to me to scoff.

"I'll snap _your _neck." Damon threatened but Jeremy merely grinned challengingly back.

"Nobody is snapping _anybody's _necks," Stefan cut in, green eyes fixed on me, his brow crinkling with obvious confusion. "You're…? Clare… I had no idea that you were…" he turned his head toward Elena. "Did you…? Is she?" Ugh.

"We… we talked about it when she came back from New York." Elena said quietly, looking unsettled and a little sick. Yeah, this was just getting more awkward.

"This is a family matter," Jenna folded her arms. "And while I appreciate the fact that Damon has been… supportive… I don't understand why we're talking about this."

"Well…" I tilted my gaze back toward Damon, pointedly. While I really wasn't in the mood to die again today, seeing _was _believing, and it would be the quickest way to explain. Damon held my stare.

"I will never let you die again, Clarissa." He said in a soft voice. Oh _goddamn _it. I was hoping he'd be over the whole violently killed thing. "It's not happening."

"It's not like I'll _stay _dead." I reminded him, feeling a little irritated.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jenna demanded. "Are you talking about video games?"

"We're talking about Damon killing Clare and her coming back to life like five seconds later." Jeremy explained lightly causing both Jenna and Elena to recoil as though he had shouted.

"Wait, wait, wait," Stefan rose out of the chair, holding his hands up, narrowing his eyes.

"Thanks Jeremy," Damon said with mock cheerfulness. "That will sure endear me to your family." Jeremy flashed him a thumbs up.

"You… hurt Clare?" Stefan asked, as though betrayed, and I had a feeling this was about to get way out of hand. "You… Tried to help her kill herself?"

"I didn't _try_." Damon said flatly as I rubbed my forehead with a hand.

"What does that mean?" Elena suddenly burst out, dark eyes furious. Her voice shook with her rage and confusion. "You're saying that you… that you killed my sister? That you hurt her? That you took advantage of her confused, fragile state for your own, sick, twisted, _whatever _is between you and Stefan?" Her angry dark eyes flashed in Stefan's direction. "You know how your brother is, how could you let him anywhere near my sister? What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Oh my God," Jeremy groaned. "Elena shut up and sit down, you don't understand!"

"I don't understand what? What _he _is? What _he _does?" She shouted back and Jeremy shot up, slamming his hands on the table and I wanted to sink into the floor.

"Damon is a good guy! He's done more for me and Clare than you or Jenna in the last four, almost five, months that our parents have been dead! He helped Clare! He made her happy, he made her better, he made her not want to _die _anymore! And he's helped me!" Jeremy growled furiously.

"So you're saying I should _thank _Damon for hurting my sister!" Elena threw her arms up in the air. "Thank you, Damon, I sincerely mean that, with all my heart! Thank you for hurting and abusing my sister!"

"Out. Get out!" Jenna suddenly snapped, pointing toward the door as she leaned off the island. She looked from Stefan to Damon, furiously. This really wasn't going as planned. "I want the both of you _out _of my house!"

Jeremy released a bark of a laugh. "This is just so like you two! When we try to tell you what's going on in our lives, you shut us out, you react so negatively it's like what the hell is even the point?"

"_He _is probably compelling the both of you!" Elena folded her arms.

"_WE ARE ALL WEARING VERVAIN!_" Jeremy yelled, causing Elena to take a step back.

"He's a murderer, Jer! He's killed innocent people!"

Let's just scream that a little louder.

"Yeah? And what about Stefan? Hey, maybe the reason you two get along so great is because you _both _selfishly caused the death of your—"

Damon was suddenly in front of Jeremy, a hand slapped over his mouth. I released a breath I didn't realize I was holding. Good God. "Careful, you might say things you don't mean," he murmured quietly. "Getting into long drawn out fights with siblings is a real pain in the ass. Trust me, I know."

"Give Damon a chance," Stefan said just as softly, green eyes pleading, and I stared at him with warmed surprise. "I've… been wrong about him for many years. What we are, Elena… we live in between. In shades. It isn't just black and white… You don't realize it, you didn't know Damon with how he used to be, but he's _different _now." Elena pressed her lips together tightly, but the anger was fading.

"Someone explain what the _fuck _is going on in the next two seconds or I'm calling the police." Jenna said in a quiet, furious, voice and Damon's blue gaze flickered in my direction. I lifted a shoulder upward. He had no choice, really.

With a sigh, Damon flitted across the kitchen and then was suddenly in front of me. Jenna choked on a gasp as I eyed Damon curiously.

"What—? But he just…?" Jenna babbled in the background, my attention completely Damon's as he gently took my hand, turning it so my palm faced upward.

"Super speed, Aunt Jenna." Jeremy said lightly. "It's really annoying."

"After this, never again." Damon's blue eyes scooped me up, his voice and touch soothing all my nerves all at once. He brought my hand closer to him, planting a soft kiss in the center of my palm causing my cheeks to warm. "I'll never hurt you again, birdhouse. _Never_."

I realized, a beat later, that he had no intention of snapping my neck as he twirled a steak knife around in his fingers. His gaze locked with mine and despite being a little afraid of being cut with a knife, I only felt trust for him. Pain sliced across my palm and I winced, but it wasn't nearly as horrible as I thought it was going to be.

"What the hell are you doing!" Elena rushed over to me and Damon gracefully stepped to the side, though she didn't seem to remember he was even there. "Oh my God, Clare, why would you let him do that? Oh my God! Why…" she trailed off, watching as the wound began to close all on its own. "I don't…" her dark eyes lifted to meet mine. "Clare?"

I lifted my palm, showing a concerned Jenna that I was now cut-free and she looked between me, Damon and to Stefan who was totally trying not to vamp out. The veins under his eyes faded as his gaze locked onto my hand.

"I heal. I can't die. I don't know what I am." I said quietly, lacing my fingers with Elena's as she gripped my hand tightly. "Stefan and Damon are vampires." Damon shot Jenna a fanged grin but she merely stared back at him. "From now on, don't invite anyone inside. Like you can open the door and gesture for them to enter, but don't say 'come inside' or any variation. Vampires need to be invited into the house."

"And you don't have to worry about any vampires controlling your mind or anything," Jeremy added. "The perfume you're wearing is actually vervain. It'll protect you from them."

Jenna slowly sank into the chair closest to her, her wide eyes turning back to me. She didn't look afraid. Or angry. Just _surprised_. Stunned. "Why are you telling me all this?"

"Because we're family, and you should know." I said with a small shrug. "And because we have to protect ourselves and the best way to be protected is for everyone to be on the same page. Elena…" I took a breath. "Elena is in danger."

"What?" Jenna and Elena demanded at the same time as Stefan stiffened, his gaze flickering in Damon's direction.

"What do you mean?" Stefan demanded. "What do you mean she's in danger?"

"Stefan is going to have to explain this more in depth to you, but you look like Katherine." I explained softly to Elena. "So that means I look like her a little bit too. And while we were in the city… I ran into a creep named Elijah. He's a vampire. And he's made it very clear that he's going to come find us. I don't know what he wants, but I _will _find out, Lena, I will. He recognized Katherine in me but for some reason, because you look like her, that's important. I dunno. It's only a matter of time before he figures out you exist and where we live."

"But…" Elena hugged herself, looking shaken and I felt bad. But she _needed _to know. Everyone did. Stefan was instantly beside her, hesitant as though afraid she'd reject his comfort. "What do you _mean_? Because I… I look like… I look like _her_? Why does he want me? Why did he want her?" She turned her frightened gaze toward Stefan, as though he would have all the answers. "Who is this guy?"

"I… I never heard her speak of him before," Stefan said helplessly, his gaze becoming determined. "But we'll ask her. When Damon frees her from the tomb, we'll ask her. I promise you, we will figure this out and I won't let anything happen to you."

"She's _alive_?" Elena and Jeremy asked simultaneously as I blinked, staring blankly at Stefan. Who was alive? Who would they ask?

"I thought you said she Katherine dead?" Elena rose her eyebrows as Jenna suddenly stood.

Katherine… was alive?

"I'm going to make tacos. Who wants taco? How about I make brownies? Yes… I'm going to make a lot of brownies." Jenna's voice sounded strangely high pitched as she walked right out of the kitchen.

Wait.

Katherine was _alive_?

"I didn't realize she was." Stefan said quietly. "I just recently found out."

She was _alive_? Katherine. Alive. My heads was spinning.

"Well, are you sure she's in the tomb?" Jeremy asked. "'Cause if I was being hunted by a vampire like Elijah, I'd fake my death too to get him off my trail."

I felt like all the air had been ripped out of my body and I stood, frozen. My lips and everywhere Damon had ever touched me now burned. She was _alive_. And he was going to free her. Isn't that why he had said he wanted me to remember the good when he left? Because he was _leaving_. With _her_. And he let me kiss him—and he _kissed _me! And he let me be—be… _intimate _with him! When he _knew _what the shit _meant _to me! I knew that Damon still felt strongly for her, but now it just made so much sense why he was still so in love with her. Because she was alive and he was just going to _leave_.

With _her_.

After everything he… he…

I was such a fool.

I was such an idiot.

I _knew _how Damon was. And he flat out said in the beginning he couldn't be what I wanted him to be. What was I expecting? That I'd be _special_? Different? I was just some _silly _girl with a _stupid _crush and look at where it landed me. But how could he do this to me? When she was _alive_? Didn't I mean more to him then someone who was… What even was I? A distraction? Simple fun?

I pulled out my phone, texting Caroline telling her to reply and possibly pick me up. I wanted to get away from here, I needed a freakin' moment to myself, I needed to _talk _to her. I needed her advice. I wanted to cry and be pissed and hurt and confused, but I didn't want to do that here.

"I was going to tell you." Damon's soft voice sent hot white anger through me. I lifted my head, staring at him with betrayed fury. He stepped closer and for the first time in my life, I wanted to hit someone. I wanted to _stab _him. How could he fucking do this to me? "Clarissa, I'll explain."

"Explain?" I repeated, hurtling my phone at him. He easily side stepped it and it shattered against the wall with a loud _CLANK_. It only made me angrier. "You were never going to tell me!"

"Okay, maybe you're right," Damon agreed quickly, his hands up as though it were to _calm _me! As though I were being _dramatic_! "But I didn't tell you because I knew you'd react like this."

I felt like all the warmth had been torn from me and, shakily, I turned to Elena. "Call Bonnie. Tell her to pick me up." I instructed, trying to keep the rage and hurt at bay. I tilted my gaze toward Damon, staring at him calmly. He didn't deserve any damn feeling I had, and I certainly wasn't going to cause any more of a scene in front of everyone. No, I wasn't going to let anyone know how hurt, how _ruined_, I felt. "Go get the necklace and the grimoire. That's what you need Bonnie for, right? I imagine some witch voodoo is involved in order to free her. I help you, so you help me. I want answers about Elijah once she's freed."

Damon rolled his eyes. "If you'd shut up for a damn minute and let me _explain_," he began and I calmly walked past him. It would be fine. I would be _fine_. "Damn it, Clarissa!" He followed after me as I marched up the staircase. "Just stop," he grabbed my wrist and I yanked it from his hold, furiously turning around.

"Go away, Damon, I can't talk to you right now," I snapped, shoving against his chest but he merely stood a step below me, unmoving, blue eyes annoyed. "I'm pissed and I'm hurt and I have nothing nice to say to you and I don't think I can control myself, so _please_, just leave me alone!"

"I don't _want _you to control yourself, how many times do I have to say it! Scream at me! Make a scene! I don't care!" Damon growled and I turned back around, continuing to make my way up to my room. Why wouldn't he just leave me alone?

I hated myself, because I didn't _want _him to go away. I was pathetic.

"Fucking talk to me! I'm a dick, I fucked up, I should have told you, so I'm _sorry_!"

I angrily threw open my door and turned around, staring at him incredulously. "You're _sorry_? What do you have to be sorry about? _GOD_!" I spun back around and marched into my room, trying to shove back the tears. "I'm such a fucking idiot! I knew this would happen, I _knew_! I did the one thing I always said I never would!"

And now here I was.

Crying.

Over someone.

Over some _boy_.

Over some boy who, unsurprisingly, _hurt _me.

Over _Damon_, who had easily come in, undoing everything, sweeping me up while I told myself the entire time to not let myself be swept up. I wondered how many other women he did this to.

Furiously, I swiped the tears from my face and ripped open a drawer, pulling out clothes for me to change into at Bonnie's. I hated how so aware I was of Damon, that I could _feel _him close by. Angrily, I threw down a shirt I was holding.

"You _knew _what all this shit meant to me!" I exploded, facing him angrily, trying to keep my balance as his intense gaze struck me down. "I _told _you right from the beginning! Kissing is fucking special to me! I just don't give those away to anyone! Hand holding and cuddling and damn near making you my fucking _everything_! You're just as bad as _her_, Damon! After what she did to you, how could you fucking do it to me!"

"I couldn't stop myself! I couldn't resist! I want to kiss you, so bad, all the fucking time! Don't say that shit to me, Clary, I would never do to you what Katherine did to me and Stefan! What she did to _me_! I tried not to be selfish with you! I even—I've made you forget some things!"

What the _fuck_? He compelled me to forget shit? What the fuck was this?

"Why didn't you tell me?" I just didn't _understand_. How could he think any of this was fucking okay? "If you truly tried not to be selfish, you would have _told _me! I would have—I would have helped make sure nothing… Nothing more happened between us, I would have never let us cross those boundaries!"

His blue eyes seemed to plead with me, for me to understand, but I didn't want to. I didn't want to believe anything he had to say. He was _leaving_! With _her_! There was nothing to explain!

"Because I need you to need me! Because I _am_ selfish!" He reached for my hand and I recoiled. "Clarissa," he breathed, his hand hovering. "I _choose _you! I pick _you_! I'll never leave you! So what does it matter that Katherine is alive? Who fucking cares? Do you want to know about _all _the women I've fucked? You could go on a fucking journey to see if they're still alive or not!" He moved closer and my head was spinning at his words.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" I shoved against his chest but he wouldn't move, keeping me nearly trapped against him and the dresser. "That would be such a _long _journey even Frodo Baggins would be like _hell _no! I doubt you even remember a fraction of them! And this isn't about who you slept with! Don't make me out to be some jealous girl, Damon! Because Katherine is your…" I choked, my heart squeezing. "Your love. You _love _her. And you were going to make _me _a part of one of those forgotten women who so easily succumb to your stupid Damon charm…"

"Didn't you fucking hear me?" Damon snapped furiously. "I said I _pick you_! If you'd fucking shut your stupid mouth for a damn fucking second, you'd understand that nothing is wrong! You're being dramatic! How can you ever, for a damn second, think you're just someone I'd fuck and chuck? You know me so well, better than anyone, but right now you don't know me at all! I have a fucking tattoo to match yours, because I want to have a piece of you with me forever, Clarissa! _Forever_! I'm not leaving you! I'm freeing Katherine, but I'm not leaving you! I'll never leave you!"

"_WHY_?" I choked out, the tears falling faster. "Because I died and stayed dead for a few extra seconds? What's suddenly different? That changes _nothing_!"

"It changes fucking _everything_! Everything! _You _changed everything!"

"But it's Katherine." I whispered, feeling stricken. "It's Katherine. Your… Your true love. The girl you've done everything for. The girl that you've been waiting to free for the last hundred years. Do you really expect me to ask you to stay? Do you really expect me to stand in the way of your happiness? You're finally going to have what you wanted, how the hell do you think I'll feel knowing that I've kept you from that? I'm not selfish."

I felt so miserable and ruined, and I knew, at the end of all this, I would gladly help Damon with whatever he wanted. Even help him walk away with that damn vampire who didn't deserve his affections.

"No, you're just a fucking idiot. Stop thinking about what you _think _would make me happy, and let me put your fucking happiness first damn it." Damon snarled back. "You made me your blue fucking canary so here I am, trying to do what you want me to be!"

"Then I take it back. You're not my blue canary anymore, you're not my _anything_." I felt sick inside and Damon froze, his blue eyes digging into me, making my heart clench painfully. He snatched my arm and jerked me against him, my everything crying out for his touch which made me hate myself even more.

"You _need _me." Damon growled lowly, igniting the rage instantly. Didn't he know who I was? I was Clarissa, and I needed _no one_! No one at all! I built myself up, and I would stay happy! Was I a fucking idiot? I would get over this! I would be _fine_!

"_Need _you?" I whispered furiously with a bitter laugh, trying to rip my arm from his tight grip. "You poor, poor deluded vampire. I don't _need _you. You can leave, Damon, I assure you that it won't break me."

"You _like _me and I _like _you, and we're fucking dating! We've _been _dating! We're in a fucking _relationship_, surprise!" He growled in a low, furious, hiss, his hot fingers tight on my upper arm. Everything became hazy at his words, the world crumbling away. Damon's mouth slammed violently against mine, his teeth gnawing angrily at my lips.

I flung my arms around his neck, pressing myself as tightly as I could against his body, kissing him back with a frantic urgency that completely took over. I felt hot and desperate, needing to be closer, feeling half crazed. All the misery and anger fell away. My fingers twisted in his silky hair as he smashed me against the dresser, my back erupting with pain at the contact that seemed to coil the hot, electric, pleasure tighter around me. I moaned, Damon's slick, hot, tongue thrusting aggressively into my mouth as his searing fingers pressed into my hips with a bruising grip. The heated kissing was spiraling into something wild and messy, his hot hands were everywhere, clawing, gripping, pressing tightly into my skin. With a growl, he hoisted me up, his fingers digging into my thighs as he pressed himself between my legs.

"_Damon_," I gasped out, my voice a desperate plea—I wasn't even sure what I was _begging _for and his mouth was slanted over mine again before I could think, before I could say anything else.

And then suddenly we were both tumbling to the floor of my bedroom, Damon positioning himself on top of me, my legs wrapped tightly around his waist as we devoured each other's mouths messily. A thick desire had pooled in the pit of my stomach, growing rapidly, and suddenly all that mattered was Damon, and Damon's hands, and Damon's mouth on mine. I needed him feverishly, needed his skin pressed against mine. I needed _more_. I squirmed under him, and moaned as he rolled his hips against mine. His mouth left mine, sloppily moving down my jaw, his burning fingers sliding under my shirt and creating a searing trail as he moved his hand up my stomach. An almost painful spark of needy pleasure struck me, his tongue, his mouth, moving down my throat. I couldn't stand it, I was going to go crazy. A hand moved over my mouth firmly and I was only half aware of the sounds coming out: the breathy, needy, moans.

Pain shattered through me and I gasped against his hand as Damon's fangs tore into the base of my throat. _Hard_. Tears sprang, leaking out, and I nearly saw stars for a moment as the pain broke into a hissing hunger. I withered under him, my choking sob falling into a loud moan which was muffled by his palm. I arched into him, tearing my fingernails down his shoulder as the pool of desire exploded, heating everything up all at once with such a brutal frenzy that I bucked against Damon's hips. He bit down rougher and I clawed at him desperately, the terrible pain tangled with the burning pleasure in such a fit of agony that I couldn't _take it_. I moaned helplessly, panting against his palm. Everything begged for his touch, everything burned viciously for him. And then his mouth was gone from my skin.

I peeled my eyes open, staring through the hazy lust, and Damon's dark blue eyes scorched me so painfully it tightened the coil of desire in my stomach. He had an animalistic hunger on his face, his mouth bloodied and with a stinging jolt I realized it was _my _blood on his face. The realization made every inch of me ache with need and his lips sprang up into a dark smirk, his blood stained fangs glinting in the darkness. I wound my fingers in his hair and crushed his sinful mouth to mine, kissing him. He parted his lips and I pulled his hot tongue into my mouth, sucking feverishly, the familiar metallic taste of my own blood shamelessly causing my own twisted arousal to grow. Damon growled lowly, the sound vibrating against me. He tilted his head, kissing me deeper—only to pull back suddenly. I stared at him in frustrated, confused, need.

We were both panting, his hot breath pelting against my swollen, wet, lips. Damon looked like he could eat me alive and I shuddered, linking my arms around his neck, tugging. I wanted to kiss him. I wanted him to kiss me back. I wanted to lose all control again. He shifted and I bit back a moan.

"Clarissa," my name slid over me like delicious silk, he said it with such reverence and hunger that my entire world spun. Damon's fingers were tracing my lower lip, smearing what I was sure was my own blood across my face. "I choose you. I will always choose you." Like a rush of air, all the lust fled from me. "This has to be the most unromantic way I could have possibly asked you out." Damon muttered and amusement spilled through me, tugging a sea of warmth that had been missing. I gave a small, watery, laugh.

"It was very Damon." I murmured, pushing lightly against his chest. Damon pulled us into a sitting position, his arms loosely around my waist, as I sat back on his lap, my legs on either side of him. His blue eyes captured mine instantly. "D… I… I don't… I could never ask you to choose me."

"You don't have to ask me, and that's more of the point. I can't be happy if I know you're not. You _know _me. You know me better than anyone, better than I know myself." His wiped the blood off his face onto the shirt I was wearing—which, technically, was still _his _shirt. "And I know you better than anyone, too, Clary. You helped me realize a lot of shit. And then I thought you were dead forever and it made me realize what I needed."

I felt dazed and wound my arms around his neck, lightly playing with his collar. "No." This was all just so… so much. I mean, he was picking me over _her_? But he _loved _her.

"No?" He repeated, a frown on his face. "No, what?"

"No I'm not gonna date you." Well... "Not until KP is out of the tomb. You can't just switch from her to me. And you might… might not realize…" I tilted my eyes away from him. "How much you love and miss her until she's standing in front of you aga—"

Damon smushed his wrist against my mouth, and I choked as the hissing, thick, liquid bitterly rushed into my mouth and down my throat. I wrinkled my nose, pushing his wrist away and hastily wiping away any of his blood that might've gotten on my lips.

He stared at me flatly as I sputtered, his heart bouncing off mine inside my chest as the familiar, bizarre, feeling of his blood crackled and popped inside me like a combination of soda and poprocks. I gasped as everything I felt for Damon slammed back into me, warming every inch of me with a sweetness that nearly blinded me for a moment. There was no escaping Damon, he touched every part of me, even places I forgot existed. His blood was loud and demanding, seeking all my attention while gently easing and smoothing down the hurt, chasing away any doubts that had sprung on what he wanted, or needed. I found myself relaxing, and his warm relief brimmed under my skin. I had always felt nothing terrible could happen to me as long as I was near Damon, and now, with his blood inside me again, I knew it to be a fact. I marveled at it.

He wasn't going to leave because _he _didn't want to, completely, with every fiber of his being. The idea of it seemed so impossible now. I felt the edges of his guilt, for Katherine, for every hurt he'd caused me, for his past, for Stefan. There was so much of Damon that was still so _hurt_, and there was nothing more that I wanted than to help him fix all of it. I felt his surprise and then a rush of need that flowed tenderly through me, his blue eyes affectionate as they brushed softly across my face, soaking in every inch of me. But there was so much of _me _that was hurt from my past too. We were both messed up, in our own ways, and there was a cooing promise that one day there would be nothing but happiness.

I would never be able to doubt Damon. Never again. No matter what was to be said, or what would happen, or what would appear to be. I wouldn't be able to doubt this or him or even myself. I would always be able to trust him. There was no holding back, no reason to make up excuses or lies or pretend this was something else. Damon had _all _of me. And I _wanted_ him to have all of me, because nobody made me feel the way he did, nobody adored every inch of me or _knew _every inch of me like Damon. Nobody could take away all the bad with a single touch like he could. I swore to myself at a young age that I'd never give anyone else that kind of power to hurt me, ruin me, the way my own mother had. But I knew I could give Damon that power, I knew now that he wouldn't ruin me.

I lightly traced the curve of his jaw with the tips of my fingers, taking in every detail of his face. His blood hummed sweetly at the contact, and I felt everything light up between us where my skin met his. I felt his entire being flutter and sigh with an unnamable joy that filled me too. I wanted to remember him forever. I wanted the way he was looking at me, so gently, with his soft blue eyes and his sinful, yet angelic, face and jet black hair to be my brightest memory. There was nothing to compare to Damon. No poetry nor sonnets nor any known language could ever correctly word the depth and level of affection I felt for him. And no painter nor sculptor nor any kind of artist could ever capture Damon's dark beauty or essence. There was something about him that defied all things and I wanted to keep Damon for as long as I lived. And at the same time, I knew it was more than a simple want.

I needed Damon. As if I were a flower and he were the sun. I was like wilting petals, yearning for his touch, his warmth. I wanted to bask in all that made him _him_. It didn't matter if I could never have him, or what the future would bring, as long as I could be near him, as long as I could continue adoring and admiring and living in his warmth. Like a flower, I could live without him, without the sun. I could live inside, with artificial light. I would be fine. I would live fully and happily, I would bloom brightly and colorfully. But with Damon I would become so much _more_. With him near, there was a certain happiness, a certain warmth and light that filled me that couldn't be found through or by anyone else.

All I wanted to do was to touch him, to admire every inch of him and somehow keep this moment forever. I wanted to imprint the way his skin felt against my fingertips and the way he looked burned in my memory and the way he smelled and made me feel locked inside of me. So I could look back and remember this vividly, fondly, for when I didn't have him anymore. I could look at Damon forever and there would always be something new to find, something else to admire.

"I'm yours." I wanted him to hear it out loud, I wanted him to know that he would always have me, no matter what the nature of our relationship became or what would happen with Katherine. He would always have _me_. "You are my favorite memory," I continued, his blue eyes lit with a brightness, a happiness, that swam though me. Everything I felt for Damon swirled warmly between us and I felt an overwhelming sense of giddiness. Because Damon felt the same way. "You're my favorite everything. There is nothing better than you, nothing else that matters. _I_ will never leave you, either."

"Clary, Clary, Clary," he chanted my name in a soft, endlessly adoring, voice. A blissful glee sprinted through me, his warm hands were cupping my face, the pads of his thumb sparking his blood under my skin, making everything inside me dance. "I'll do this right. I'll take it slow. _Anything _for you, anything you want. It'll be as romantic and as stupidly human and as disgustingly Disney as you want."

Even if I wanted to, I wouldn't be able to hide the feeling of the burning happiness that bounced through me. I gazed at him affectionately, everything inside of me lit with a giddiness that twinkled through the both of us. His blue eyes were so very bright and a happy grin lit across my face.

"Don't forget the endless vampire dickery and mischief." I couldn't keep myself from gushing it and Damon's happiness exploded inside of me, overwhelming and overriding everything until only laughing joy filled every part of me.

"Endless," he vowed with such conviction and a sweetness that I knew there was nothing but Damon. His blue eyes touched my face tenderly, his gaze soft as though to look at me any other way would be wrong. "_Always _endless. Only you. Only this. For longer than forever, for longer than an eternity, for _always_."

He leaned closer, his mouth hovering over mine, his breath sweet and intoxicating and my eyes fell shut. I was melting. To his touch. To his bright happiness that swirled through me. To his words. My fingers curled against the nape of his neck, warm jolts dancing up my fingers and down my arm, warming my fluttering heart. His blood crackled and popped and fizzled gleefully and I felt like there were millions and millions of lights inside of me that were all buzzing, flickering on, burning brightly. Everything came to life.

Damon's mouth met mine tenderly, his happiness tangling with mine. I leaned into him, a rush of relief and need flowing through me, as a flare of warmth tingled against my lips and spilled through me slowly. Like his blood and my blood were calling to each other and sang at contact. His lips curved into a grin against my mouth and I felt like I was about ready to burst open with all the sweet adoring bliss that was being poured into me. I pulled back, sitting on his lap, a wide, beaming, grin stretched against my face and his matched mine, his blue eyes light and dancing.

"They're taking bets on what we're doing," Damon's voice was warm and lazy, like he was a cat sprawled out by a window sunbathing. "Jeremy thinks we staged the whole fight and snuck out."

I released a slightly hysterical giggle. "Okay," I was feeling dazed as I attempted to wiggle off his lap. Damon was standing suddenly and easily pulled me to my feet, his hands on my shoulders as he led me toward the bathroom. Confusion flickered and I felt his amusement rise.

"You're wearing your blood all over your neck," he breathed in my ear as he shoved me into the joint bathroom. I nearly shrieked upon seeing myself in the mirror. God I looked like crap! A bloody mess of crap!

"This is your fault," I say at once, turning on the faucet. "You attacked me like a savage animal!" His affection rolled over me and I was having trouble thinking. I craved his touch.

"You liked it," Damon tossed me a very predatory smirk, blue eyes darkening in the bright bathroom lighting. I could feel his amusement and a slither of lust twinkle through him causing my cheeks to warm as I hastily scrubbed my own blood off my skin.

God, I did like it. I liked it a _lot_. I even liked tasting my own blood on him.

Damon spun me around, pressing me against the counter as he trapped my body with his. I trembled as his hunger and mine sparked loudly within me, my gaze locking with his. His hot fingers moved over my neck, smearing the blood and soap. I instantly leaned into his touch.

"I love feeling you like this," Damon's voice was low and husky, his blue eyes burning into me as he leaned closer. "I love feeling you becoming undone by my touch." Jolts and sparks ran through me and I couldn't hold back the soft moan as he stroked my neck.

"_Damon_," I sighed his name blissfully. "I win." He blinked, his gaze focusing back onto my face and I felt his confusion drown out his lust. My lips sprang upward and I patted his chest. "You lost control _twice_. First when you kissed me, second when you bit me. I win."

Damon squinted his eyes at me playfully and I marveled over how I felt the incredulous disbelief, amusement and warm fondness that flowed into me from him. "We're still going to play that game? Even though I can, and will, kiss you and bite you whenever I want?"

I jutted my lower lip out into a pout and ran my hands up his chest until my arms were curled around his neck. "But wouldn't it be more fun to try and make each other lose control? If you don't want to play anymore, fiiiine. I'm still taking my two wins."

He didn't even have to say it, I could _feel _the fact that he liked the game and wanted to continue playing. Holy God, maybe we should stick to ingesting each other's blood more often. We'd never have to speak in public again. Damon snorted, an attractive, crooked, grin forming across his beautiful face.

"What do you want?" He asked quietly, looping his arms around my waist and pulling me closer. I nuzzled into his warm chest, sighing happily.

"Disney marathon," I began causing him to groan. "And for you to dress up like a kitty instead of me."

"But I already got you the perfect outfit." Damon whined and I tilted my head, grinning up at him.

"Guess you're wearing it now."

I didn't need to be supernaturally connected via blood to know Damon was now intending to get me to freak out and kiss him in a passionate, out of control, fit of lust. He wanted me to be the kitty bitch and like hell that was happening. I wanted him completely at my mercy with his little kitty ears and collar… Maybe even tied up. _Begging_. A shiver ran through me, desire echoing, and I wasn't sure who it belonged to and if it was growing by feeding off each other's.

"Clarissa," he breathed, blue eyes hungry and full blown, scraping across my face. A haze fell over my thoughts. "What are you thinking about?" His voice was low, husky, and compelling.

"Leather and whips and handcuffs and whipped cream with strawberries and kitty ears." I blurt out, unable to keep myself at bay and Damon merely _stared_, his hunger coiling tighter around me but his amusement bringing enough relief that I wasn't about to fling myself at him.

"_Aheeem_."

I nearly jump out of Damon's hold as I whipped my head around, finding Stefan leaning against the doorway to Elena's room, a stupid smirk growing across his stupidly amused face, his arms crossed. A flicker of irritation bounced through me from Damon, followed by a soft happiness at Stefan's appearance. I was a little surprised by the other emotions; a lingering fear, a nervousness and overwhelming _hope_.

Who is the best? I am the best. I friggin' called it. Emotionally, Damon was rolling his eyes at me and I merely shot him a mental smirk.

"Please don't ever let me stumble in to see you two doing whatever it is you were just talking about." Stefan said lightly, his voice playful and teasing. Christ, Damon was considering it.

"Aw, Steffy, I think you'd get a kick out of Damon dressed in a maid's outfit with kitty ears." The mental image was just beautiful and Stefan choked on suppressed laughter as Damon tilted his gaze back to me, his eyebrows raising.

"That's never happening." My raven haired vampire told me firmly, but there was a flicker of curiosity that hummed in my chest and a grin split across my face. Damon was the type to try at least anything once.

And if it meant getting weirdly sexual with me, I was positive he'd give in. Not to mention he really had no choice. I _won_ and the rules stated _anything_. Damon shot me a huff of playful irritation before turning back to Stefan.

"Is there something you wanted?"

"Jenna is… accepting and ready to talk to _all _of us. They sent me up here in case you two were…" he trailed off awkwardly. "You know… doing things." Thanks family.

"Better to have the immortal scarred with images for the rest of eternity than the mortals." I agreed with a nod. "A wise decision."

"I thought you were killing her." Stefan suddenly confessed and despite the easy going expression Damon continued to wear, I felt hurt disappointment flare momentarily. I leaned into him, as though to chase the feeling away. "But Elena, uh… explained."

"Explained?" Damon repeated and I frowned. Oh God. Did Bonnie tell her that I liked to be bitten? Stefan shifted awkwardly, his cheeks turning an adorable pink, as he held up a straw. Damon's curiosity coursed through me as I stared at Stefan, flatly. Was he kidding me?

"From Jeremy. For next time."

Bonnie was _dead_! Dead!

Elena told Jeremy and Stefan that being bitten turns me _on _and now they're all making fun of me for it! Amusement slammed into me, burning hotly, and I burst into giggles before I could stop myself.

"Damn it," I laughed, smacking Damon. His amusement grew and tears of mirth formed. I clutched my stomach as the laughter began to hurt. "S-Stop!" I managed between breaths of laughter. "Th-this isn't f-funny!"

After I calmed down (Stefan was under the impression I was on my way to having a nervous breakdown), we rejoined everyone in the kitchen where Jenna was taking the whole vampire thing with surprising grace. She set down some ground rules, like just because Stefan and Damon were undead monsters that had lived in sin for thousands of years didn't take away the fact that they were still _boys _and so the doors to our rooms had to remain open when they were over. (Jenna threw a cup at Damon after he brightly informed her they couldn't knock us up). There would be no vamping out in her house, no murdering the innocent townsfolk in her house, no overall vampire drama in her house. It was a vampire drama free zone and Damon and Stefan would respect that or she'd pour her perfume into a spray bottle and spray them with it.

She then happily informed them that they could spend time with us on Monday, as we were grounded, and everyone was surprised when I agreed. It wasn't so much that I _actually _agreed, I just knew the importance of feeling respected and in control, something Jenna desperately needed. She had just established that she needed to be the parental guardian she never wanted to be, so the last thing I wanted was to discourage her.

That and I wanted to see if the blood connection could work over a distance, because it'd come in handy if we could communicate emotionally apart especially if we were going to be dealing with freakin' Elijah. Damon was not happy in the slightest but complied. Elena and I had formed an agreement immediately after ("I won't tell on you, if you don't tell on me") regarding having our respectable vampires in our rooms, and I found that I hadn't at all broken my phone. The battery just had fallen out. Which was kind of sad. In a fit of anger, I couldn't even break my phone.

"Iron, huh?" Jeremy asked, half concentrated on his video game as I sat on his bed, cross legged, with my laptop. "That's really weird."

"I know." I agreed as I scrolled through supernatural forums. I felt a flare of boredom on Damon's end and smothered an amused grin. Ten minutes after he'd left, and the bond was still in tack. I half wondered if the amount of blood ingested influenced how long the bond continued and how strong it was.

More things to research.

"Hey…" Elena appeared in Jeremy's doorway with a plate of brownies, looking between us. "What are you guys doing…?"

"Researching and video games," I said, patting the spot next to me.

"You have brownies, you are welcomed." Jeremy agreed, hardly sparing her a glance as he continued to mesh buttons. Elena rolled her eyes with a tiny smile and bounced down on the bed next to me. Jeremy swiped a brownie off the plate without even looking away from the screen.

Mad skills.

"What's the verdict?" Elena asked, leaning over my shoulder as she stared at the computer. "Are you some freaky goblin child?"

"Har. Har." I huffed, grabbing my phone as it buzzed. I frowned in disappointment when I saw it was just Noah. What the hell? "Have you texted Caroline at all today? She's freakin' ignoring me."

"She has a new boyfriend, let her be." Elena said, sliding the computer over to her lap and my frown grew. Caroline and James were _dating_? I thought she just wanted him as a play thing.

Why was I the last to know this?

A sense of inquiring curiosity filled me from Damon's end and I quickly assured him it wasn't important. He merely sent frustration back and my lips twitched upward. Deal with it, D. I quickly read the text from Noah and sighed.

"Noah says fairies are the only supernatural beings afraid of iron." Which coincided with everything I was finding on the internet. But I needed _more_. I didn't _want _folktales or stories from TV shows or things from fiction.

"I do believe in Clarys, I do, I do!" Jeremy said in a teasing voice causing Elena to laugh. Thanks guys. Really supportive.

"What's important about iron?" Elena asked as she scrolled through the wiki page for fairies.

"Apparently it kills Clare if she touches it." Jeremy explained as I sighed dramatically, taking a bite of the still warm brownie. Elena frowned, but didn't look up, just as my phone went off.

I perked up, seeing it was Damon calling, and hit speaker phone. "Heeeello, D."

"_This is annoying as hell,_" Damon grumbled, his voice crinkling loudly in the room. "_What are you doing?_"

"Hi Damon," Elena greeted in an annoyed voice, dark eyes flickering toward the phone.

"You're missing out on seriously delicious brownies," Jeremy added pleasantly and I felt Damon's irritation rise.

"_I want brownies_." Damon whined childishly.

"Vampires can eat people food?" Elena asked, actually sounding interested and Damon's amusement tangled with mine.

"_Yes, Elena, we can eat people food._" Damon said sarcastically, and I marveled over how I could feel what he was about to say next, his intention so clear. I wondered if I'd know even if we weren't connected. "_Fuck it. I want some brownies. I'm coming over_ _and before you whine at me, I'm coming over to visit _Jeremy_, who isn't grounded_."

"Could you bring Stefan?" Elena merely requested, looking unbothered and I raised my eyebrows, proud of my sister as pleased surprise pulsed through from Damon.

"_Naughty._" Damon purred suggestively before disconnecting, an excited happiness lighting everything up inside. I wasn't sure if it was his or mine.

Not two minutes later, it was a party with Damon and Jeremy trying to show Stefan how to play Call of Duty.

"Really, Steffy, you should be used to tearing into victims," I said lightly, looking up from the computer. Stefan shot me an annoyed look while Damon openly laughed, a gentle fondness rolling over me. My smile turned a little loopy and I was growing more and more used to being connected to him. I liked it. I liked feeling everything he was feeling.

"It says here," Elena said over us, scrolling the page down a little. "That fairy children were left in the place of stolen human babies. I always knew you couldn't possibly be related to me, Clare." Elena was _joking _but I shifted awkwardly. Damon, while outwardly focused on the game and killing Stefan, shifted all his attention onto me and I wrinkled my nose.

"We look alike." I said it mostly to reassure myself, but that _could _be a possibility. I mean, why else did Elena look like Katherine? And it might explain my body snatching abilities… somehow.

Not even a little.

I sighed, knowing I'd be feeling so much more frustrated if it wasn't for the constant hum of soothing calm that I was getting from Damon. And the slight amusement. Apparently this was funny as hell to him. Thanks, jerk. Damon tilted his head and threw me a little sassy grin.

"I think you could be a fairy," Stefan agreed, appearing to somewhat be getting the hang of the game. "You're mischievous."

"Damon's mischievous too." I pointed out. Like, seriously, Stefan. Damon was the friggin' king of vampire dickery! "He's _more _mischievous, actually!"

"Yeah and he comes off as a real _fairy_," Jeremy deadpanned, swiping the controlling from Damon's hands. Stefan snorted, earning himself a punch that I'm sure hurt.

"Ha. Ha."

"He could be a part of the Unseelie Court since he likes to hurt humans," Elena said happily, pleased with her detective skills of using the wiki page correctly. "And you can be in the Seelie Court! Because you like to play harmless pranks and crave mischievous things! God, this is suddenly making so much sense!"

No it wasn't!

"But I look human." I frowned. They were just… just applying things because it so happened that the wiki was vague and they _wanted _it to fit! It was like reading horoscopes!

"You could be a Changeling, a fairy offspring," Elena clicked the blue highlighted word. "Hmmm…"

"No, look," I pointed to the screen. "The Changelings totally know they're fairies. I don't _know _what I am!" I faltered, leaning forward, reading a part of the paragraph with interest: _they could spirit away children and even adults and take them back to their own world_.

Had I been _spirited _away from my world and brought into The Vampire Diaries world? Left in the place of the other Clarissa who died? But then how could I heal myself? Why didn't I die? The fairies were immortal, so did that mean they had the same abilities as vampires…? Was I a Changeling? But if I was, then why would I remember my old life? I felt a surge of frustration from Damon. He obviously wanted to know what I was thinking.

"Well _this_ is you," Elena pulled the computer back. "They hate being told 'thank you', as they see it as a sign of one forgetting the good deed done, and, instead, want something that will guarantee remembrance."

"Being a bitch and being a fairy are suddenly the same thing," I huffed, squinting at the screen. I pointed. "Yeah but the sentence before it says fairies cannot lie. I lie all the time."

"And you don't have wings." Damon leaned back, blue eyes teasing. "Life would be _sooo _much more fun if you had little wings."

"No it wouldn't." Stefan shuddered. "Clare flying around, doing God knows what?"

"Let's throw her out a window!" Jeremy offered with a grin. "Maybe she'll fly."

"I've already thrown her out a window." Damon said thoughtfully, acting as though he didn't notice the looks he received, his amusement burning hotly causing a giggle to slip out. I slapped a hand over my mouth as Damon grinned. Damn it.

"You've thrown her out a window?" Stefan ran his fingers through his hair, shaking his head. "I shouldn't be surprised."

"Yeah we had a lot of fun when we found out I couldn't die," I deadpanned. "I had a list of ways I wanted to be killed and Damon fulfilled all of them. The decapitation wasn't as fun as I thought it would be."

Stefan and Elena started at me with growing horror on their faces and my serious expression cracked, amusement spilling out causing them to both sigh with relief and Elena to smack my arm pretty hard.

"Well, this site says fairies have an aversion to the color red," Elena said, her and Jeremy turning to both give me grins and I flushed. There was no way this Clarissa shared my hated for the color. Damon's gaze tilted toward me, curiously.

"Clare, why don't you like Marvel?" Jeremy piped. "_Because it's red_!" He mimicked in a high pitched voice that didn't sound like me at all. "Clare, why don't you like Coke? _Because it's red_!"

"It's true!" Elena grinned widely. "Show Clare something red, and she'll hate it. Show her the same thing in a different color, and it's the best!"

Damon raised his eyebrows, _clearly _thinking of doing horrible things involving the color red and I scoffed.

"Red is just so… so… I just don't like it and that doesn't make me a _fairy_!" I said dismissively. "I don't want to rely on wiki, though. We need something more… solid. Lena, can you do a quick search? See if there's any folklore professors in the area? These people dedicate serious time and research…"

"Do you think whatever you are, is the reason Elena looks like Katherine?" Jeremy asked as Elena typed away. I had been thinking that. I tilted my gaze toward Elena thoughtfully.

"We could kill her and see if she comes back to life." Damon suggested cheerfully causing Stefan to growl loudly. Damon flashed him a grin.

"Ummm… There's a research team in the anthropology department dedicated to Parapsychology and folklore," Elena said distractedly as she clicked on the link. "At Duke University. That's pretty close."

"Two hour drive." Stefan nodded, tossing the controller aside. Jeremy threw his hands up and turned off the xbox.

"Right, because a two hour drive is going to be fun with Clare." Jeremy muttered. "It'll feel like a decade of misery."

"Parapsychology…" I murmured thoughtfully, trying to remember what that entailed. "See if there is a number or visiting hours for the public. Does it say who runs it?"

"Yeah, a Vanessa Monroe and a Isobel Flemming," Elena said causing Damon and I to immediately stiffen, his blue eyes flying to meet mine. _Isobel_? Could it be the same Isobel? Stefan's attention snapped toward us, obviously picking up in the subtle mood change.

"Isobel?" I repeated, shocked, peering down at the screen as Elena choked on a gasp. My mouth fell open as my gaze locked onto a picture of two smiling women.

When Damon had told me I _kind of _looked like her, he completely forgot to mention _how much _we looked alike, like it was more than just _kind of_. It was eerie. There was no denying it, the similarities between us spoke loudly. This woman was mine and Elena's birth mother.

"She—Clare—she _looks _like you! Oh my God!" Elena cried as I snatched the computer from her. Jeremy bounced up and was leaning over us.

"Holy shit!" He cried. "She really does! Talk about _freaky_!"

"Parapsychology, the study of paranormal phenomena _including _reincarnation! Oh, Isobel, you _knew_!" I gushed excitedly, my fingertips flying over the keys as I opened a new tab and Googled her name. "She must have been keeping tabs on us, knew that you looked like Katherine! She must've looked to reincarnation before stumbling over something else! No wonder!"

"Wait—wait!" Elena stood and Jeremy took her spot on the bed next to me. "What? What are you talking about? Why would she be keeping tabs on us?"

"I didn't have enough evidence to support a theory to even bother telling you before," I said as I clicked on an article: _LOCAL NORTH CAROLINA POLICE STUMPED, MISSING BODY OF A YOUNG WOMAN NEVER FOUND, PRESUMED DEAD_. I quickly scanned the article. "But we're adopted."

"_WHAT_?!" Elena and Jeremy shouted.

"What the hell are you talking about C?"

"Adopted?! Are you kidding me? We're not adopted!"

"Katherine can't have children…" Stefan said softly, realization dawning in his voice. "And you look like her."

"And I look like you and Isobel. Two and two, really," I said breezily, a wide grin stretching across my face as I spotted a familiar name. _Alaric Saltzman, distraught husband of Isobel Saltzman_. "You _clever_ boy. Oh, this just keeps getting better and better! I _knew _he was here for a reason!"

"Who?" Elena demanded, swaying a little. Stefan was instantly next to her, helping her stand right.

"I feel like we should be on Jerry Springer." Jeremy said with a shake of his head, as though he couldn't believe this. But other than that, he seemed pretty accepting. Which was good. Finding out his sisters were adopting, all in a typical day and life of the Gilbert family, clearly.

"Alaric. The guy who broke my nose with the door." I grinned happily, looking up at Elena. "Oh come on, relax. I _just_ found out about the adoption thing and I seriously needed proof before springing it on you. That and I forgot…"

"How could you forget?!" Elena cried, looking shaken and sick. She swatted Stefan's hands away. Damon snorted.

"Dunno, Elena, maybe because there's a psychopath vampire that wants to kill you?" Damon offered with a taunting smirk, causing her to pale a little. "Clary has been a little… preoccupied trying to figure out who he is and what he wanted with _Katherine_. Sit down, there's no use in getting all worked up about this right now."

"Other than the fact that we're _adopted_!"

"Love is thicker than blood." Damon murmured calmly, drawing Jeremy's and Elena's attention to him. He lifted a shoulder upward. "Nothing has changed, you three are still siblings, and your parents are _still _your parents. Who gave birth to you doesn't really matter. Besides, she forsake humanity and became a vampire." I felt a rush of affection for him, and sent him a soft smile.

Sometimes Damon knew the right things to say when he wasn't being a total tool. I felt that I could always count on him to back me up, no matter what. But then, I'd do the same thing for him.

"Did anyone witness you turning her?" I asked curiously. "Because I'm sure that's why Alaric is coming to town." Like Santa. Only I'm pretty sure the only one on his naughty list was Damon, and instead of coal, he was bringing stakes.

"Why do you have to make enemies everywhere?" Stefan frowned at Damon who scoffed, rolling his blue eyes.

"I didn't know she was _married_. How is this _my _fault?"

"You keep saying I look like her," Elena fixed me with a stare. "How much do I look like her? Tell me, Clare. How much do I look like Katherine?" Crap.

I glanced at Stefan who stilled, his green eyes flashing in my direction. I pulled my lip into my mouth, chewing on it. What the hell was I going to say? I really didn't want to lie, especially since the more Elena knew, the better.

But I also didn't want to deal with the blowout of her knowing right now. I wanted to keep on track, not have drama spew between her and Stefan where she might drag us in it for _keeping _things from her.

"Think: doppelgänger." Jeremy said and I jerked, staring at him, startled. _Doppelgänger_… Why the hell didn't I think of that word before? I couldn't pinpoint down why, but I felt that it was the _correct _term. "You could be identical twins." He glanced at me and then to Stefan, shrugging. "Hey. Someone has to tell her. It's not fair."

"…_What_…?" Elena sputtered, eyes wide. "I… _what_?"

"Oh jeez." Damon groaned. "Remember Jenna's rules, no drama!"

"Shut up," Stefan snapped and Damon held his hands up in surrender. "We're already far past that. Elena," he turned back to his babbling girlfriend. "Listen… I can explain…"

"Doppelgänger," I repeated with a slow smile, realization flaring to life brightly. "Jeremy, that's it! That's a supernatural thing! _Yes_. Yes, yes, yes!"

"Explain?" Elena asked in a high pitched voice, sounding betrayed and close to tears. It's probably how I sounded before. "I _look _exactly like _Katherine_?!"

"What are you doing?" Jeremy asked as I opened a new tab and began making a fake email account while I opened another and searched the keywords: Katherine, doppelgänger, Elijah. The internet had to give me _something_.

"It's—it's complicated! But that isn't why we're _dating_!" Stefan assured her quickly. "Katherine compelled me to care about her! It was never real for me! What I feel for you—it's because you're _you_, the way you look has nothing to do with it!"

"I'm going to Craigslist it." I said happily, ignoring the drama that was exploding around us. "There has to be some freakin' vampire out there that'll respond to the ad. Maybe even Elijah himself."

"If it makes you feel any better, you are _nothing _like Katherine." Damon chimed warmly, squinting his blue eyes.

"Stay out of this, Damon!" Elena snapped, crossing the room quickly as though she couldn't stand being near the two vampires. She tore the necklace from her neck and chucked it at Stefan angrily.

"You know, that's probably legit," Jeremy said, pulling the laptop from me. "Here, let me make the email. I'm creative."

"He's right, you and Katherine are so different that it's laughable!" Stefan pleaded. "You're kind and sweet and caring and considerate and I've never felt this kind of happiness with anyone, please, Elena… You're beautiful, inside and out…"

"No vampire drama," Jeremy said in a singsong, him and Damon pounding fists. "Jenna said." Elena threw him a furious look.

"I'm sick of everyone keeping secrets from me! I look like _her_? And you… how can you _date _me when I look like _her_? If I look exactly like her, how the hell are you separating us? You can't! It doesn't matter if we act differently!" Elena hissed, dark eyes flashing in my direction. "_And _you didn't even bother telling me about us being… being…" she released a frustrated scream and I slid off the bed. "I need to be alone!"

"Elena," I grabbed her arm and sat her down in Jeremy's computer chair. She narrowed her dark eyes at me. "I want you to calm down," I told her quietly. "It's _okay_. We're adopted, you look like Katherine, it's all okay. Just calm down. We'll be freaked out about it later and you and Stefan should have this conversation, calm and civil, in privacy. Don't be angry at him, there's a lot he wanted to tell you on his own time when he got the balls to do it. He's _not _dating you because you look like Katherine." She stared at me and I was surprised when she closed her mouth and merely nodded.

"Besides," Damon said lightly. "It would be like if you two were actual twins. People do it all the time, date one twin and have no interest in the other."

Elena made a face at him.

"Heeey, how does _ClarytheClefairy_ sound as your new email?" Jeremy asked with a teasing grin and I smacked his arm. "I'm _kidding_. It won't reveal who we are, the email I made is actually just a fake name. So you want me to make a Craigslist account?" I gave him an affirming nod, settling back down on the bed excitedly.

"Is this really going to work?" Damon frowned, squinting his eyes at me, as he plopped down on my other side with the plate of brownies.

"You vampires are bored as hell, I have no doubt some of them would be cruising Craigslist." I said with a grin, snatching a brownie from the plate. "Go back to the other tab, see if anything popped up for the keywords I put in."

"If you're seriously going to try to Google this, you should use her real name instead." Damon's faux bored voice snagged my attention to him instantly. Her _real _name? Why was this the first I was hearing of it? "Katerina Petrova."

"Katerina?" Stefan repeated, finally looking away from Elena who was pointedly looking anywhere but him. "Katherine was an alias? She told _you_?"

I tsked, wagging my finger at my vampire with mock annoyance. "You said you didn't know anything about her." He flashed me an overly innocent smile and tapped my nose.

"Really? You're jealous, Stefan?" Elena asked with a rather bitchy smile that I was pretty proud of and Stefan blanched. She fixed him with a look, raising her eyebrows expectantly. "Does it bother you still, after all this time?"

"N-no!" Stefan quickly assured her. "I'm just surprised!"

"He thought he was the favorite." Jeremy gave a knowing nod and Stefan groaned as Damon's grin turned sarcastic.

"She never _told _me, I snooped through her stuff," Damon lifted a shoulder upward. "So, technically, no, I don't know anything about her. Just her name. And I wasn't about to tell you the one thing I knew. I know how you work, you'd find out everything about her and I wasn't sure I wanted to know…" _But things are different now_. He didn't have to say it and I realized, suddenly, that we weren't connected anymore either. But the unsaid words were loud.

"Huh, we're getting some things for a Katerina Petrova." Jeremy said, quickly glancing through the links before returning back to making a Craigslist account and I bounced excitedly on the bed. I had gotten _nowhere _with Katherine, and now we were finally making some head way!

"Oh my God, Damon, thank you so much! You're friggin' brilliant!" I gushed giddily, turning to beam at him, so freakin' pleased by the turn of events that I was overcome with a desire to kiss him.

With a bounce of pleased glee, I realized that I _could_! Whenever I wanted! I tugged him closer by the front of his shirt and planted an affectionate kiss on the side of his mouth. He caught my chin in a flurry of movement and kissed me back causing my smile to burst into a wider, giddier one. His mouth curved into a faint smirk.

Elena pretended to gag. "Gross." She was just pissed off and in a shit mood.

"Ew, so you guys are actually a thing now?" Jeremy groaned and Damon nuzzled into the crook of my neck, my heart bouncing with warm glee. I affectionately ran my fingers through his hair, causing him to sigh happily.

"We're each other's." Damon declared passionately and my mouth twitched upward, my cheeks warming.

I liked that. _Each other's_. That was certainly less of a mouthful than: 'we're not dating because of complicated reasons but we're totally going to act like we are'. Wished freakin' Caroline would get back to me so I could giggle to her about it. Was it really this morning that I had been telling her nothing would ever happen between Damon and I…? That seemed like a lifetime ago. Though, I guess, technically, it was. I _did _die. And this _was _a new life.

"Now I have to give you the speech," Jeremy said with a long drawn out sigh. "Look, if you hurt her, Clare's probably going to dunk a stake into a tank of vervain and stab you in the dick. She's a psychopath when pissed off."

I threw Jeremy a look but he merely grinned back at me. That wasn't the speech! He was supposed to warn Damon off from hurting me otherwise he'd go Van Helsing on him! Whatever.

"I guess I have to give you a speech too," Stefan joked, sitting by Elena's feet, completely ignoring the fact that she was angrily kicking him. He might not even feel it. I wasn't sure how the whole vampire thing worked. "If you hurt my brother, I'll send you flowers."

"Make sure they're not daisies," I frowned as Damon rested his chin on my shoulder, his arms coming around me. I was having trouble thinking, a haze of happiness blanketing over my thoughts, making me feel dazed. He smelled so _good_, and I felt so comfortable. "According to the internet, daises are vervain for fairies."

"Maybe we should test that out." Elena was just on fire today.

And Damon was overly affectionate.

And Stefan was playful.

And Jeremy was getting along with everyone, actually grinning and joking.

Today was just a really, really, strange day.

But I kind of hoped things continued to stay like this. You know, just minus the dying part.

"What should I say?" Jeremy asked, going into _Missed Encounters_ on Craigslist.

"To Mr. Elijah M, or anyone of interest, regarding the Petrova doppelgänger. And then leave the email address we just made. Set it up in the New York area, though. Otherwise it'd give us away." I suggested with a faint grin, giddy as hell. I was feeling ridiculously smart right now. And clever.

"What are you going to do if Elijah responds?" Stefan asked after a moment of silence drifted between us.

"Offer him Katherine." It was _obvious_. Elena and Stefan's looks of shock made me pause. "If it's between the two of you, are you really surprised I'd pick the one I don't know and don't care about?"

"It makes sense…" Jeremy said quietly, nodding. "It's kind of cruel, but…"

"You can't just sacrifice someone, Clare." Elena frowned at me. "It doesn't matter how you feel about her or what she's done in the past. She doesn't deserve that and I'm not going to substitute someone over myself like that."

"You won't have to," Damon said quietly. "We'll do that _for _you. That's also another reason why you and Katherine are very different…"

I could have smacked myself. Here I was, talking about throwing the woman Damon has spent the last hundred and so years waiting to free, and who he was still _very _much in love with, to Elijah. I cringed and turned to face him, gently stroking his arm.

"No, Elena is right…" I murmured softly, meeting his guarded blue eyes. "We'll free Katherine, give her the heads up, and… We'll find another way."

"And if there isn't another way?"

"We kill Elijah." I said firmly, leaning into Damon. "I know that Katherine is always going to be a birdhouse, people can have more than one, and I'm not going to ask you to do something that will only hurt you." I felt him relax against me.

"I'm glad we can casually talk about murder." Jeremy snorted.

"We're not killing Elijah." Elena sighed, running her fingers through her hair. Good God, there was no winning with her. "Only if it's the… the last resort… I—I mean… do we know for sure he means us harm? Have you actually _talked _to him?"

"I'm sure he's only interested in a friendly chat." Stefan agreed sarcastically.

"It _is _possible that I misconstrued things," I admitted, though I highly doubted it. "But I really don't want to offer him a chance to talk to us, because if he does mean us ill intent, then we're way worse off. Besides, it's not like I'd know how to contact him. I get literally _nothing _when I Google Elijah Michaelson."

"Well, if he's old, than Michaelson wouldn't be spelt like _Michael-son_. It probably has some weird spelling. You said he sounded European, right?" Jeremy trailed off thoughtfully.

"And it's possible that it was an alias." Stefan muttered. "It seems that it's common for vampires to do that."

"Yeah, you guys need to hop on that train." I nodded, amusement stirring. Elena's lips twitched into a faint smile that she was obviously fighting.

"Mmhm, and try not to sign any more paperwork. People might wonder why Stefan and Damon are reoccurring names in your family."

"And it's not like you have the excuse that you didn't know you'd be vampires, either," I added causing her smile to grow. "You guys totally knew Katherine wanted to turn you."

"It would have looked suspicious if we used fake names." Stefan shook his head.

Pfft.

Despite now having Katherine's real name, I felt like I was left with more questions and more headaches than before. Like every time I felt like I was getting closer to the truth, the further from understanding everything I became. There wasn't much Google had to offer, though I wasn't surprised. There was a paper written by, surprise, surprise, Isobel, about a Katerina from the 1400s who disgraced her family and was banned from her country and then a few years later her entire family was slaughtered.

Maybe by Elijah.

Maybe by a pissed off Katherine.

We kept stumbling over a familiar word: _moonstone_. But nothing that elaborated what it was or the importance. And the only reason I felt the need to pause was because I was sure I heard that word before. Eventually Stefan and Elena decided to go into her room to talk about Katherine, Jeremy had an video game date with some kid in California and I was about ready to kill myself by slamming my head through the laptop screen.

I wished I had a magical phone that allowed me to call my roommate and get all the answers I needed. I wished I had paid attention to the stupid show. This was really coming back to bite me in the ass. Why couldn't life be _simple_?

* * *

I do believe in Clarys, I do, I do and Clary the Clerfairy were inspired by JackieOh who left a really hilarious review. Thanks! Okay, so, I can't promise I'll be able to update weekly again since there's a lot of chaos going on right now, but I WILL try! And hey, I finally found a great picture of Clarissa's faceclaim that accurately represents how she typically looks. Pfft.

I REALLY hope you guys are totally okay with Clarissa and Damon making their way into Darissa. I was kind of hoping to drag this out for a bit longer, but suddenly this. I know some of you are annoyed by Damon's feels for Katherine, and even though he's picking Clarissa, and even though he's going to have to come to terms that Katherine didn't love him the way he thought she would, Damon will always care about her. That's just his way.

**I MADE A TUMBLR**! Link is in the profile (or you could just: walter-adolph-georg-gropius ...Yeah I don't know, my roommate made the tumblr) The tumblr is dedicated to this fanfiction, so there's lots of Damon yumminess. When things settle down here, I'm also going to post sneak peeks of the future, some Kol-Jeremy-Anna stuff that probably won't make it into the fic, random Clarissa adventures, smutty shit, some Elijah/OC crap ect. And since I never really check my email and often don't realize I have PMs, I'll be happy to answer any questions you guys have there too!

Ah. Yes. The M rating. Technically, given the adult themes and the fact that I've written 'fuck' as many times as I did, according to fanfic rules this is already an M rated story. I just have to remember to change it. I may just keep the really dirty stuff on the tumblr, though.

Also, a giant hug to Randomreader1320, I'm sorry to hear about your house. D:

And now, questions I didn't get to answer last time!

**Q: Witch!Bonnie?**  
I have a lot of plans for Bonnie. I really didn't care for the way Bonnie seemed to constantly be getting the short end of the stick, or the way she forgave everyone so quickly for shit. Bonnie is gonna be a badass witch.

**Q: Vampire!Elena?**  
I'm STILL on the fence about this, but if I do lean toward Elena vamping it out, she's going to make the decision. Like it's not gonna be forced on her or anything.

**Q: Klaroline?**  
YES!

**Q: Damon and Jeremy bonding?**  
I'm really surprised and happy you guys like Deremy moments so much! So yes, I'll be sure to continue writing them. I never intended them to be more than grudgingly civil with each other, but this story seems to have a mind of its own.

**Q: Darissa should have a pet!**  
Love the idea! What kind of pet?

**Q: CLARISSA FAIRY?**  
You guys are on the right track!

**Q: Nightlights guardians?**  
Ooo, maybe. ;D

**Q: _ Bashing?**  
Oh jeez, I don't mean to! I don't mean to bash ANY characters, it's just, well, with how Clarissa is she tends to be a twat. I don't mean to bash on Stefan, he's actually my favorite character (I'm completely in love with him actually). And I don't mean to make Elena bitchy or parenting.

A mega big thank you to my fantastic reviewers: Guest, Padfootfaerie123, Cara, madison. g. johnson, withthatimightadd, Mercy Smith- Kincaid, Gueest, Horty, Alex Kavanagh, Arabella, Miss Shannon P, MissJess13, marie65291, kdpierce2, AlexHide, Lil'Conqueror, Guest, flazzy cullen, shawnzy, ddluzelle, Vampire I No Drama, 1llu510n, AlexMelRose, Lucilla Tinwetari (I love your long reviews, don't apologize!), Randomreader1320, Kitsunekit75, RosesMoon, Guest, Lorelai Sofia Petrova, DGfleetfox, sashaxh, Cat Lady, tablekorner, Adrian, Lana Scott, RealHuntress18, vikki. dillard, CaribbeanTrinidadian, MelissaIsLame, Sxintia, Chaos-and-Insanity, melissa2005, nessafly, The Dark Lady55, SomebodyWhoCares, FalconHQ, MrsMusicAddict, Britt, XxbriannaxX, LoveLiveLife22, ADORATIO, Moka-girl, Sissymac, Teamdarissa5Ever (GAH LOVE THE NAME), antspants, Tylerstrikes, Kiikii, XxxBrEnDaxxX (THAT SUCKS I'M SORRY! Hope you found the person who stole it/got a new ipod!), Guest, iheartanime07, Rayven Plexure, Sunblaze99, Guest, JackieOh, janeyjane, xXxElizabeth MikaelsonxXx, bridgetzombie! You guys are so amazing, thank you so much!

Oh man, it's 4AM and I have to get up in a few hours. Whoops. Hopefully I'll be able to get the next chapter out to you guys soon! Hope you guys are having a great July! Thanks for reading. :D


	18. Chapter 18

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

HOLY CRAP A MEGA BIG THANK YOU TO YOU GUYS, YOU GUYS FRIGGIN' ROCK: princessabbie10, dallas laczny, Chaos-and-Insanity (things are going side ways, and it's a blast :D), Hypnotist, ddluzelle, LoveLiveLife22, Tuggy08, DanielleBurkex3, RealHuntress18 (some Alaric for you :D), SomebodyWhoCares, Britt, Kittywithfangs, Sissymac, Lucilla Tinwetari (Hellos from Withery, and we've actually only kept two cats. Hers, and an older cat who is about 12. We found nice homes for the others, and we now also live with two other dogs. :D thanks for askin'.), Random2Friends, Guest, nessafly (*AGGRESSIVELY FOLLOWS BACK*), Kitsunekit75, RosesMoon, 1llu510n (gah thank you so much!), Moka-girl, I love damon Salvatore girl, JackieOh, Amara Rose 4 Ever, iheartanime07, CaribbeanTrinidadian, SavannaHerondaleLovesDauntless (I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD TIME ON VACATION I AM SO SORRY I COULDN'T GET THIS OUT TO YOU SOONER), karmen238, K. Todd, Lana Scott (sorry to hear about your phone D:), Miss Shannon, Guest, KimmyWSmith, Teamdarissa5Ever, Guest, Apatu (HOLY FRIGGIN' SHIT OH MY GOD OH MY GOD YOU LUCKY BEAST! I WOULD HAVE DIED INSTANTLY ON THE SPOT IF I EVER SAW PAUL WESLEY IN REAL LIFE.), kdpierce2, vikki. dillard, marie65291 (I'm more or less in the same poor people boat with you!)

* * *

It was now Friday, which was great because I could dedicate the entire weekend to shifting through the rumors and bullcrap that circulated the internet. I just had to get through the next six hours of school. I was stressed. I was irritated. I was craving information which led to needing _a lot _of caffeine and any kind of sugar I could get my hands on. Between the maybe five hours of sleep I'd gotten over the past few days and the overall lack of _nothing_, I was cranky as hell. It's not like I haven't gone days with very little sleep, because I _have_. A lot less than what I was currently doing now. But I needed sources. I needed _real _information. Supernatural forums weren't cutting it. I just wasn't sure where to go.

A part of me was resigned to seeking out Elijah himself. I wasn't sure how to do that, but I was fairly certain it'd be a lot easier since he was (probably) actively searching for me. I just didn't know if it was sleep deprived frustration and desperation that flung that thought into my head and if it was even the right thing _to _do. Elijah was an unknown factor and I didn't doubt that he wouldn't bother striking a deal with me (one that I would back out of immediately after gaining what I wanted) once he found out where I was and that Elena was, well, existing. I figured he'd just swoop in and take her.

…And a tinier part of me was more than willing to give her up in the name of finally getting all the answers I wanted. But that was the exhausted, annoyed, desperation talking.

The only thing that had me from slamming my face into my own locker and screaming in a fit of tearful frustration was the fact that I _did _have a semi-successful night. I confirmed that it was _my _blood that created the sync between Damon and I. Drinking from him first didn't do _shit_, and Damon didn't need us to share blood, he only needed _my _blood to feel everything I was. Which meant it wasn't a _vampire_ thing. It was a _whatever I was_ thing. I figured once my blood was in his system, it made _his _blood magical.

This only left me with a headache and more questions than before, everything circling back to the same thought: How the hell was I going to figure out what I was? The internet, again, was only a mix of gossip, rumors, fiction and crazy people. And if I did stumble over the truth, well… How would I know? I needed real sources. And real information.

Other than the edge of crankiness that accompanied the lack of sleep and the frustration of being pathetically in the dark (something that has never happened to me before), I was also pretty sure I was starting to hallucinate. Which is typical for sleep deprivation. According to the internet. The less sleep I had, the more it seemed I'd _think_ I'd see something in the corner of my eye, or some light flickering across the room. I was honestly reminded of a Doctor Who episode and wondered if I should start carrying around a black marker to mark my arm whenever I saw something just in case I was instantly forgetting. This did nothing for my mood and I was becoming more and more prone to distraction. Which didn't help me at _all _in the slightest.

It didn't help that the entire town was suddenly under construction, either. The _official_ story was that _new _scientific evidence showed that iron was leaking a sort of chemical into the ground which was highly toxic and that anything made of it (pipes, gates, _horseshoes_) had to be removed immediately or the town would be facing some pretty extreme fines for endangering the safety of the locals and polluting the Earth. I knew for a fact that Damon had gone off and compelled some high ranking people in the government somewhere. He hadn't said anything, and I wasn't going to bring it up, because while I was annoyed by the constant noise, I was also very touched. I didn't care if this was over the top and extreme. Iron scared the _hell _out of me now, I wanted it all _gone_.

"_Clare_!"

I blinked tiredly, refocusing my gaze on Bonnie and Caroline, who, annoyingly, was waving a hand in front of my face. Insulted, I narrowed my eyes.

"Don't treat me like a spastic child, Caroline, I was thinking," I sighed, feeling my patience wearing thin already. "I'm surprised you even bothered showing up given your tendency to flat out ignore us. Shouldn't you be sucking face with Jonathan?"

"James," Bonnie corrected airily as Caroline raised her eyebrows at me, clearly unaffected by my snark.

I fixed Bonnie with a look, annoyed she spoke his name out loud. I had said the wrong name on _purpose_, it was to belittle his existence, and she should've realized and gone with it. Bonnie merely gave a sassy look back.

"I told you, my phone isn't working right," Caroline insisted with a roll of her eyes. "I haven't been getting any texts!" _Right_.

I was _sure_.

I couldn't tell if I was just cranky or if I'd be annoyed all the same. I didn't like James because he took Caroline's attention away from _me_. And I was selfish. I hated coming second to anyone, especially when things between Damon and I were making my head spin and I wanted to talk to her about it. It wasn't the same with Bonnie, we weren't as close. And I couldn't talk about it with _Elena_, she was my _sister_, and saw Damon as the murderous vampire next door rather than that 'hottie bad boy'. Noah was a no, and while Olivia and I had skype dates nightly, I just found myself unable to bring it up to her either. I wanted _Caroline_. And she was totally ditching me for _James_.

"Oh my Gosh, Clare!" Caroline stomped her foot, slamming my locker shut, regaining my attention instantly again. "Like I was in the middle of saying something! Whatever, you know what? I'm not going to repeat it."

Sheesh.

"It's not her fault," Bonnie nudged my shoulder sympathetically. "She's never had a boyfriend before, she can't help it if she's going to _daydream_."

I stared at Bonnie darkly. In the grand scheme of things, mine and Damon's feelings for each other were pretty insignificant.

"Shut up, Bonnie, we're not dating," Caroline mocked in a whiney voice. "We're just doing everything couples do. It's _complicated _and I don't like commitment and the idea of dating is so _blarghh_!" My lips twitched despite myself.

"You're a friggin' comedian, Care," I stated dryly. "A real side-splitting comedian."

"You love it." Caroline assured me confidently, linking arms with me. "Let's get to PE. I'm _so _looking forward to running the track for the next however long the gym is under construction."

"Seriously." Bonnie groaned, throwing her eyes upward as though silently asking the high powers to strike her dead. Or set the school on fire. "Aren't we going to wait for Elena?"

I shook my head, impatiently snatching Bonnie's wrist and pulling her along. "Nope. She said she'd meet us…"

I couldn't help but feel frustrated by the fact that I was wasting time in school when I could be dedicating this time to possibly finding out everything I need to know. God, I needed a smartphone. Immediately. And it wasn't like the Gilbert's couldn't afford it, either. I tugged out my phone, intent on texting Jenna to let her know we needed to hop on that. Like _now_. I paused mid-text, my gaze shifting toward the ring Damon gave me, the dancing colors twinkling between yellow to white to green happily. _Pretty_.

"And there goes Caroline," Bonnie sighed next to me.

I lifted my head, looking at her, and then toward our blonde friend who was prancing over toward stupid James and his stupid football pals. Matt waved warmly, elbowing Tyler, who merely gave us irritated looks.

What a pal.

"Go ahead without me," Caroline said to us, looking up at James in a flirty kind of way that made me want to loudly gag. I opened my mouth to comment when a flicker snagged my attention and I jerked my head around.

To find nothing but a sea of students.

I figured it was just the light bouncing off someone's phone that had distracted me. Sighing, I turned back to my phone and blinked as white faded into _gray_.

What the hell did that mean?

Did that mean… Possibly… the flickering that I've been seeing… was something _real_? I squinted my eyes, feeling a chill run up my spine. I was a freakin' idiot. I should have never assumed it was all in my head. Was it Elijah? But it couldn't be _Elijah_, I've been seeing _something _flickering since… since I've _gotten _here!

Unless Elijah knew this entire time.

…Unless it was another vampire keeping tabs on me.

But this was _gray_. Not red.

I tilted my gaze back toward James and Caroline suspiciously. James _was _new in our little lives, showed up right after Elijah. Maybe he wasn't _human_. It would explain why Caroline is caught up like she is. He's using some kind of voodoo shit on her!

"I could totally set him on fire for you, if you want." Bonnie joked playfully, leading us away from the now kissing couple. I turned to give her an amused grin.

"I completely forgot to tell you, but Damon found some witch stuff that I guess his family has kept from like an ancestor of yours from the 1800s," I wasn't about to tell her that we stole the necklace from the Lockwoods and then dug up Emily's book while burying a body. "It's this spell book and legit, a witch talisman. He wants you to have it, since it's yours anyway." Correction, he wanted her to get her witch groove on so we could free Katherine. But it was the same thing, really.

Surprise and then unease flickered across her face. Bonnie pulled her lower lip into her mouth, rolling it between her teeth nervously. "I was just kidding about the fire thing," she said quickly before making a frustrated noise, glancing around, and quickly pulling me into the girl's bathroom.

She had me lean against the door to ensure nobody would come in as she quickly checked the stalls.

"I know you aren't kidding." I broke the silence. In my best Hagrid impression, I declared: "Yeh a witch, Bonnie."

"Shh!" Bonnie wrung her hands anxiously. "Why are you so quick to believe me?"

Because I watched like the first three episodes of the TV show. "And because you're my friend. If you tell me something, I'm going to support you and believe you." I shrugged. "Plus… life has gotten really supernatural lately. So…"

Like this whole thing with Bonnie and Caroline not being in 'the know' was getting boring. I was certain they would be eventually, like Jenna, since they were main characters and stuff. Bonnie gave a tight smile.

"I don't really want to joke about it… I… I can start fires. I think. Kind of. Like at the Founder's party, I lit all the candles with my mind, and then at the car wash, when everyone ditched me, I set Tiki's car on fire." Bonnie was blabbing. "I know it sounds crazy! And I... I really wanted to talk to Elena about this, I mean, not to say…"

"I know, you guys are tight," I nodded with a grin. "No worries, she's your bestie. I get it. I might be a twat, but I'm your friend too, so if you ever need to talk about things, or vent about anything, even if it's not witch related… I swear I'll always pick up the phone, even if I'm with a boy."

Bonnie's face split into a wide, relieved, smile, relief brimming in her pretty eyes. "Thanks, Clare. Elena has been so… caught up with Stefan, lately. And Care… even without James, she just doesn't _listen_. You know?" Not really, Caroline always listened to me. But that wasn't the point.

"Mm. Well, that's because she just found out Stefan is a vampire." I said with a shrug and Bonnie gave me one of her _looks_. "No, I'm serious. You know when you touched him, and freaked? Well, yeah. Your witch powers totally sensed his deadness. I'm sure Elena has been dying to talk to you about it. So you should probably get witchy, 'cause some shit is gonna be happening soon. Which I'll fill you in on later, when we're not at school. Or you could ask Elena." Bell like laughter echoed through the bathroom and I jumped.

"What?" Bonnie frowned at me as I threw my gaze around, searching for the owner of the laugh. I thought we were alone! "What are you _talking_… are you… You're _serious_." She realized and I wondered why she wasn't freaking out about the friggin' laugh! "Clare? What are you looking at?" I tore my gaze away from the corner of the bathroom, Bonnie had followed my line of sight and then glanced back at me, oddly. "Wow. Those canary nightlights are _everywhere_."

"What night…" my mouth fell open as I spotted a glowing canary nightlight that I knew for a _fact_ wasn't in the outlet a second ago. I felt the color leaving my face as my skin prickled, fear squirming painfully in my gut as my heart staggered. Oh my God.

I dropped my gaze down to the ring, the green twirling into a nauseating bright red.

"We have to go," I whispered, my fingers on the door. "We have to find Elena. Right now."

"Clare?" Bonnie asked, alarmed, quickly moving to my side. "You're freaking me out. What's going on?"

I tore the door open and released a scream of surprise to find Stefan standing on the other side, green eyes fixed on my face, eyebrows furrowed with his concern. I placed a hand over my racing heart, releasing a shaky breath of relief. Here was the freakin' vampire. Did Stefan have a friggin obsession with standing directly in front of bathroom doors?

"Stefan," I breathed happily, feeling overwhelmed with giddy relief to see _him_ and not Elijah. "Jesus Christ, you scared the shit out of me." I raised my hand. "Magical ring that tells when a vampire is near. I thought Elijah was here." I turned my head to Bonnie who was staring at it with surprise. "See? Green is for witches. More proof." Bonnie tore her eyes from it, to me, and then to Stefan, immediately becoming wary as Stefan _stared _at me with a _look_. "Oh, no, don't worry. Stefan and Damon drink animal blood. Because they're lame. And yes, Steffy, I told Bonnie what she already knew. She's a witch, you're a vampire. Oooh, shocker."

Stefan opened and closed his mouth a few times, irritation flickering across his gaze causing me to smile sweetly at him. "Clare's a fairy." Stefan said after an awkward moment passed and Bonnie burst into laughter.

"No I'm not!" I cried, offended. What the shit, Stefan?

"It suddenly makes sense!" Bonnie said with a wide grin. "I knew you couldn't be human. You're probably the reason all my left socks go missing." What!

Stefan nodded. "I have the same problem."

What the hell was this? I narrowed my eyes, angrily slamming the bathroom door shut behind us and placing my hands on my hips. "Was there a reason why you decided to ruin my day with your stupid face, Stefan?" Stefan had the balls to look amused. Bitch.

"She's been like this all day," Bonnie excused with a wave of her hand, apparently now taking the whole witch-vampire conversation as a joke. _Thanks _Stefan. Way to ruin everything. "In a few seconds she'll probably zone out and stare at nothing for a while. Like a cat."

_Like a cat_… I had said that about Damon while we were at the city. Because _he _had been glowering at nothing, too…

"She must have run out of sugar." Stefan nodded sympathetically as Bonnie patted the top of my head.

In fact, Damon still seemed to glare at nothing from time to time… Had he been staring at the nightlights? Had he been seeing them this whole time, and hadn't said anything?

"Yup. There she goes." Bonnie sigh and I huffed. I was _listening_. I could listen and think at the same time. Christ.

"I've come to collect you," Stefan announced loudly, like I was a deaf person. I stared at him unhappily. He quickly glanced at Bonnie, and then back to me. "Uh… _Jenna_ is waiting outside." Stefan's gaze became pointed and Bonnie scoffed.

Christ, Stefan was so obvious.

"Okaaay," Bonnie said with a roll of her eyes. "Tell _Jenna _I said hi. And to totally give me that witch stuff. I'm sure my grams will get a kick out of it. Later, bloodsucker." She gave a sarcastic little wave and walked away. I jerked, double taking as I glanced back after her.

Fuck.

I seriously, _seriously_, thought I saw someone standing there.

But it was just Bonnie.

My gaze fell back down to the ring, but the same colors were circulating. And that silver-gray color hadn't reappeared. (More proof that it was totally James). A puff of nerves settled in my stomach, turning through me, and I glanced around. It was becoming horrifyingly obvious that some_thing_ I couldn't see was following me around. And those nightlights… Nausea gripped my stomach. Damon hadn't put them in my room. Or in my house. In fact, I couldn't freakin' _see _them unless someone pointed them out to me.

What the hell did that mean?

Frightened tears sprang. I was feeling overwhelmed, I was feeling so helpless and tiny. Why, oh why, did my life have to become like this…?

"You okay?" Stefan's voice was soft, gently pulling me from my sleep deprived, terror-induced, thoughts and I snapped my head up, smiling at him.

"Of course I am." I lied brightly, knowing full well he hadn't missed the mini freak out I just had. _Damn it_. Stefan arched a single eyebrow.

"Mmhm." He swung our joined hands and I realized, with a jolt, that I was gripping his fingers tightly. What the…? My cheeks flushed and I hastily untangled my fingers from his. Crap. "I guess I misconstrued what the hand holding meant. Sorry, I'm not really interested in making this a Defissa."

I blinked rapidly and owlishly up at Stefan. _Defissa_…? Damon, Stefan, _Clarissa_—oh my God… _Stefan was using ship names_! My mouth fell open with shock which coursed through me, momentarily pushing away the fear I had felt. "Wha…? But—_how_?" I stammered, following after him as he began to leisurely stroll down the hall. How the hell did Stefan know about shipping and ship names?

"How? Well…" Stefan grinned widely, green eyes gleaming with _mischief_. Who the hell was this, and what did they do with Stefan? "Do you really see Damon letting himself being left out? We Salvatore brothers have a _thing _for twisted love triangles. He wouldn't let it just be Stefissa."

I realized I was flat out gawking and that Stefan was much too amused by this. I snapped my mouth shut, looking at him thoughtfully.

"Darissafan sounds better."

He raised his eyebrows. "Now it just sounds like I'm a _fan_."

"Cladefan? Defanissa? Stedarissa?" I paused, grinning faintly, proud of myself. "Oh I like that! Stedarissa!"

"Good. It's never happening." Stefan said pleasantly, pulling open the door and inclining his head, gesturing for me to walk out of the building first.

"Of course it isn't without Elena." I agreed, my grin growing. I basked in the sunlight, delighting as it warmed my previously chilled bones.

"Mmm, Steledarissa. What I've always wanted." At the sound of Damon's voice, I turned, brightening upon seeing him leaning against the building in one of those typical _bad boy _poses, arms crossed over his chest.

I wondered if he ever left the house without a leather jacket. His blue eyes swept over me before landing narrowly on Stefan. A beat later I realized he must have been listening in on our conversation. _What else is new_. When in doubt, assume Damon is always, _always_, listening.

"Claryberry, as _much_ as I'd _love_ to whisk you out of school and spend the day with you, you're _grounded_. Jenna's rules. It's beyond my control." Damon said with faux disappointment and I narrowed my eyes at him. He tugged me closer, planting a swift kiss on my forehead affectionately and spun me around so I was facing the doors. "Back to the education!"

I snatched onto Stefan's arm, using him as an anchor as Damon tried to push me back into the building. I squirmed, trying to duck out of Damon's grip but he held on tight. With a growl, he grabbed me by the waist and picked me up, like I was a duffel bag. I kicked my legs, snaking my arms around Stefan's tightly. The bastard green eyed vampire merely smirked in amusement.

"Stop acting like a child!" Damon demanded, tugging, causing me to be stretched out between the two of them. Stefan made no effort to help either one of us. "Go back to class!"

"Nooooo, you're hiding things from me!" I whined back, feeling just as frustrated. "I might be tired as hell, but that doesn't mean I'm brain dead! You don't want me to know what's going on, which means something _big _is going on! And _Stefan _can't go on a road trip with you, or whatever it is that you're planning, because he has to stay here and make sure Elena stays safe!"

With an annoyed sigh, Damon gently lowered me so my feet were touching the ground, but I clung to Stefan, just in case. Damon squinted his blue eyes at me.

"Clary, go back inside."

I tilted my chin upward, feeling stubborn, dropping my arms from Stefan to place them on my hips. "Damon Salvatore, you have five seconds to tell me what you're not." I threatened back.

"Inside. Now." Damon narrowed his eyes at me, pointing toward the doors. I slapped his hand down.

"Five."

"I mean it," Damon warned. "You won't like what I do next."

"Four."

"I'll snap your neck." As _if_.

"Three."

"You're not snapping her neck." Stefan only sounded amused. Like this was _all _a big joke.

"Two."

"Shut _up_, Stefan." Damon groaned. "And help me!"

"One." I raised my eyebrows expectantly at Damon who rolled his eyes, opening his mouth only to close it, looking at me oddly. Bonnie had done the same thing. Why was everyone looking at me oddly? I shifted, uncomfortably, tilting my gaze to quickly glance around us, as that bell like laugh rang through my thoughts.

Even though it was warm out, I suddenly felt cold.

"What do you keep looking at?" Stefan asked quietly and I snapped my head back to him, and then toward Damon who was glancing past me.

"I'm not looking at _anyone_." I dismissed and blinked awkwardly under the weight of both brothers staring me down, green and blue gazes gleaming with concern. Christ.

"What aren't you telling me?" Damon demanded, taking a step closer to me. "I told you to tell me if anything _odd _was going on…" His voice was soft and I could feel the warmth rolling off him. I almost damn near blurted everything out.

"What do you mean, you're not looking at _anyone_?" Stefan asked, staring down at me. "Is there someone there?" My gaze fell down to my ring, but only the same colors were circulating, and I quickly glanced back toward the edge of the school where the light bounced off the building, playing tricks with my eyes.

There wasn't anything there.

I was just _tired_.

Right?

"Don't change the subject," I decided to stick with that, tilting my chin upward, looking back up at Damon. "I want to know what's going on. I have the right to know. I've been researching for _days_, and if you _know _something…"

Damon held my stare, clearly debating whether or not he should tell me.

"Jeremy received an email from a guy on Craigslist," Stefan said and I tilted my head toward him, surprised. Why hadn't I been _informed_? "He wanted to know if _we_ wanted to _know _about… _Katerina_ and the whole doppelgänger thing for educational purposes."

I lit up, a wide grin flying across my lips. This is exactly what I _needed_! Someone who knew their shit! I beamed excitedly at Stefan, bouncing on my heels. Oh my God, this was _exactly _what I _needed_! This was it! Finally! _Answers_!

"And? And? You're going to meet him?" I asked breathlessly, turning to look at an incredibly annoyed Damon who was staring flatly at Stefan. How could he be _upset_? This was the best thing in the entire world!

"We got his address. It turns out that Jeremy games with this kid in California that can hack into that kind of stuff," Damon said reluctantly after a moment, his blue eyes tilting toward me. "All I had to do was strip and dance in front of a webcam."

The grin faltered and I stared at him. "_What_?" He was _kidding_, right?

"I told you," Stefan grinned. "Damon is _used _to stripping."

"I did it for you, Clary," Damon agreed solemnly. "I'll use my body if it means I can get you the things you desire most. _Anything _for you." Anything for me, sure! Damon just likes the attention! He playfully tapped my nose. "Now that you know what's going on… Go on, go learn." He ushered me back toward the school and I slipped out of his hold, glee bursting through me loudly.

"No way! I'm coming with!" I released a squeal, flapping my hands as I bounced up and down. "Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, I'm so excited! Oh, Damon, you can't deny me this! This is exactly what I've been _waiting _for! I _have _to go, I have so many questions! Questions that are rightfully mine to ask! I've been up for _days_!"

"Yes, I _know_," Damon said dryly. "Who the hell do you think provided you with your constant sugar intake? All the soda, the milkshakes, the giant ass Slurpee from 7-11?" I opened and closed my mouth, stunned. "I was hoping you'd crash, but you kept on _going_. We even held entire conversations."

"No we didn't." I didn't remember Damon there at _all_. But I wasn't entirely sure how I came across my sugar supply when I hardly ever left my room and laptop.

"You're not coming with me, now get back inside." Damon repeated himself flatly and I knew it was time to get the watery eyes out.

"Damon, _please_," I begged quietly, doing my best to look up at him as sadly as I could, tears welling. He squinted his blue eyes, the effects of the faux tears working immediately. Damon looked like he was in a cross between trying to stay annoyed and wanting to give in.

"Stop," he demanded firmly, raising a finger and pointing at me, like I was a misbehaving dog. "Clarissa, _stop_. You are _not_ coming. It could be dangerous. For all I know, we're walking into a trap set by Elijah. You're staying _here_, where you won't get in the way."

Where I wouldn't get in _his _way, he meant. Scoffing, I stuffed my panda bag into Stefan's arms, unzipping it and shifting through. I pulled out a relatively small bright neon green water gun, and raised my eyebrows at Damon as he eyed it warily.

"Let me guess," he sighed. "It's a water gun filled with vervain." I smiled at him happily as Stefan uncomfortably shifted, peering inside my bag of wonders.

"Yep." I dropped the gun back into the bag as Stefan pulled out a few stakes, a frown on his face. "This was actually all Elena's idea. She has the same stuff in her bag, too."

"Why are you carrying this around?" Stefan looked a little disturbed.

"In case you piss her off," I mean obviously, why else would we be carrying around vervain and stakes? It's not like there was a psycho vampire on our trail or anything. Stefan's look told me he didn't appreciate the sarcasm.

"I doubt you'd be able to stake a vampire." Damon was dead against this and I was feeling more frustrated. I was going with him. There was literally nothing he could do to prevent this.

"I can't, but you can." I said. "And what's the worst that can happen? It's a trap. Oh no. What can a vampire do to me? Snap my neck?"

"Rip out your heart?" Damon threw back, anger flashing across his face. "_Take _you away? Torture you? So what, Clary? So what if you don't _die_? You still feel pain. I don't know why Elena is important, or why Elijah may or may not have been after Katherine, but I do know that I'm not going to dangle you in front of him if I don't have to." His gaze held mine and I released a puff of air.

"You would never let anything happen to me." I reminded him immediately, because, damn it, I was going. Damon huffed, but didn't say anything. I knew he considered that to be the absolute truth.

"She _is_ the safest with you." Stefan agreed, pleasantly surprising me. He was taking _my _side? At Damon's betrayed look, Stefan lifted a shoulder upward. "Luring us away could be the trap. Someone might be here, waiting, while we follow after false leads."

Someone might be here, _waiting_.

I tilted my gaze back down to the ring, a shiver going down my spine. Some_thing _was already here, had been here this entire time. Feeling a little paranoid, I chanced glancing around discreetly, squinting my eyes as though that might help me seeing whatever it was that apparently was following me. God, I was starting to feel like a crazy person. Though that's what I get for not sleeping. I turned my head back to Damon, an idea forming on how to get him to agree to take me with him when I found both brothers staring at me. I glanced between them.

Oh, goddamn it.

Stefan hadn't been taking my side.

He had purposely said that to see my reaction.

That clever little bitch.

Stefan was clearly more manipulative than I realized.

"You keep looking at your ring," Damon said after a moment, squinting at me, debating something.

"It's the ring of power, it calls to me." I deadpanned but Damon wasn't interested in dealing with my bullshit. He growled.

"I told you to _immediately _call me if—"

"Well it's not like I can say, oh hey Damon, my ring just turned red, because you two are never that far away!" I snapped. "So unless he's just coming around when I'm in the company of you two, he's clearly not a fucking vampire! There is literally nothing to be done!"

"He?" Stefan asked quietly as Damon stared at me with surprise, as though he hadn't expected me to blow up. I blinked at Stefan in confusion. He? He who? "You keep referring to someone whenever you're questioned about the ring or when we wonder what you're looking at. Clare… Nobody insinuated that anyone is there but you."

"I don't know. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I can only see a flicker—or I think I see someone… but when I look, nobody is there. It only happens when I haven't slept well, it's been happening since I _got _here." Damon immediately understood what I meant by _got here_.

"You've been… this has been going on for weeks." Stefan shook his head. "The first time I noticed was when I was in the car with you. And then again at the car wash." I released a puff of air.

"Today the ring changed to a color I never saw before." I confessed. It wasn't like I wasn't going to tell Damon. I had planned on it. Just _later_. His gaze pierced me. "It was a gray-silver color. Just for a little bit. And it's not like I can exactly pin point where it was coming from or from _who_. I was in a crowded hallway. But the color wasn't there when I was in the bathroom with Bonnie. We were _alone_. And… I, well…" my cheeks warmed, though I wasn't sure why I was feeling embarrassed. "I heard laughter, but she didn't. Whatever this is, is the reason for the canary nightlights that people seem to be able to see when I can't. In fact, I don't see them _unless _someone points them out to me."

I gave Damon a pointed look but he only seemed annoyed that I was onto what was going on.

"Canary nightlights?" Stefan asked and I jerked, staring at him. "What are you talking about?" _Oh my God_.

"You don't see them?" Damon frowned. "They're all over the boarding house, they're everywhere."

"He can't see them either." I realized, my thoughts clicking together. It was suddenly so very clear. "Because whatever is doing this can _choose _what we see! Can _hide _things! He—it—doesn't like Stefan! That's why I've been having the dreams, he wants me to be afraid of Stefan!"

"Dreams? What dreams?" Stefan demanded, furrowing his eyebrows as he stared at me with concern while Damon's expression became thoughtful. For a moment, I thought I was hearing chimes.

Until I realized it was _that laughter_.

I froze in a fit of fear, neither Salvatore reacting. Why weren't they reacting? Didn't they… didn't they _hear _it…? "You," I choked out, panic slamming into me. "Didn't hear that?" I was going crazy.

That's what this was.

My mind couldn't handle the fact that I was in a TV show, it was _breaking_. It couldn't handle that I could die and come back from it. The walls of reality were crumbling around me, I was _going insane_.

The world jerked violently under my feet.

Damon was suddenly in front of me and I slammed my hands against his chest, to push him away, because he shouldn't be _real_, and I needed to _breathe_. But my fingers curled and I found myself gripping him like if I didn't the ground would swallow me. I clung to him with everything inside of me, my heart racing, the terror growing. I buried my face into his warm chest, squeezing my eyes shut. This wasn't happening. It _wasn't_.

_Wake up_.

God, why wouldn't I just wake up? I wanted to wake up! I needed to wake up! This wasn't real! This wasn't happening! It couldn't be happening! None of it was plausible!

Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. _Wake up. WAKE UP!_

"Clarissa," Damon's voice was soft, his fingertips stroking where my pulse frantically met skin. "You have to calm down, you're having a panic attack. You're okay. It's okay."

How could he think any of this was _okay_? This was fucking _insane_! All of it! And I didn't want to deal with it! I didn't want this to be what my life consisted of! I was destined for _so much more_! Didn't this reality understand who the _hell_ I was? I was freakin' Clarissa, damn it! And nothing threatened me! Nothing backed me into a corner with some stupid supernatural peak-a-boo bullshit! No.

No, I would not crumble.

And I would not doubt myself.

I pulled back from Damon, slanting my chin upward. I wouldn't, couldn't, have a mental break down. Not in the open. Not in front of Stefan. And definitely not in front of whatever was _stalking _me. I was _Clarissa_, and the world would bow to me!

"If this _whatever _thinks I'll take this laying down, then it has another thing coming." I stated firmly, letting the anger ride over the nauseating terror. "I'm _Clarissa_—"

_SMACK_!

Tears of pain welled in my eyes from the impact of my own freakin' hand making contact with my cheek. I blinked rapidly in pure shock. I just… I just _slapped _myself in the face. Damon gawked back at me, looking completely taken aback, before understanding flickered to life in his gaze.

I was—I was still _compelled_! I had gotten too Everett-y according to myself, and I… I _slapped _myself! What the _hell_? Damon's mouth twitched—he was _amused_!

"_GODDAMN IT_, DAMON!" I cried unhappily as he wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into a tight hug, shaking with silent laughter. I whined, trying to wiggle out of his hold, but he had me completely pinned. "This isn't funny!"

"I… think I missed something." Stefan murmured behind me, sounding concerned.

"Your brother sucks, Stefan! He has me compelled to smack myself!"

"You said you found a way around the compulsion," Damon said in a singsong, his voice overly light and cheerful. I was grateful for it. I needed it to not be serious right now.

"Go get your car! You're taking me with you, and that's that!" I demanded, resting my chin on his chest as I glowered up at him. Damon grasped my face, squishing it between his fingers.

"Mmm, if anything happens to you, I'm gonna kill everyone in this town," Damon said cheerfully, tapping my nose with the tip of his finger as he released me from his hold. His gaze flickered past me. "Stay here with Clary."

And then he was gone.

He better come back. I swear to God if he left me here and went to get the answers by himself I was going to be really, really, upset. And it would be something he'd totally pull. Because Damon was a little liar when it suited the situation. But then again, Damon tended to be a bit protective (hence the complete removal of iron in this town) and I was pretty (desperately hopeful) sure that Damon was going to hover just a bit more. Because I was afraid.

I should be a strong woman who needed no man to take care of her. But I'd gone my _whole _life only ever having myself to rely on. …So what if I wanted to grab Damon's hand, shut my eyes, and hide behind him? …That didn't make me pathetic, right? I could still be confident, amazing, Clarissa _and _be terrified out of my freakin' mind while simultaneously clinging to my big bad vampire without losing any of my own badassary… _Right?_

Amused laughter suddenly broke through my thoughts and, half distracted, I turned to look at Stefan.

"I never thought I'd be saying this," he began and I wondered what horrible thing he was about to say. "But it's pretty funny that Damon has you compelled to slap yourself…" he trailed off, grinning, and I stared back at him, offended. I snatched my panda bag back from his hands, digging through it and yanking out the stake.

I waved it at him threateningly, but he merely raised his eyebrows, looking amused. "Don't think I won't, Steffy." I said with a huff. "I'll stake you in the face."

"Heard that before." He replied with a cheeky little grin. Oh he was so getting staked. Maybe not now. Or even today. But I _swear _to God, I was going to stab him one day.

Just to show him I'm being serious!

"Shouldn't you two be in class?"

I nearly dropped the stake in surprise, turning to find _Alaric _standing there, his gaze shifting from Stefan, to me, and then to the pointed piece of wood in my hand. Holy God, Alaric caught me. Red handed. With a stake. His eyebrows raised just a little, something flickering across his gaze too quickly for me to get a read on it.

"You're going vampire hunting dressed like that?" Alaric wondered with light curiosity, easily taking the stake from my hands, and I glanced down at myself with a frown.

What was wrong with my panda outfit? I thought the panda hoodie with matching earrings, bag, knee socks and white frilly skirt was _cute_. And it wasn't like I got dressed this morning thinking 'gonna stake me some leaches'!

"You gonna teach a bunch of judgmental teenagers like _that_?" I threw back instead, eyeing his laid back clothing and he ducked his head, his grin turning sheepish.

"Well… I don't exactly have time to go shopping for a new wardrobe. I start teaching this Monday." Alaric said, shrugging his shoulders in a 'what can I do' sort of way, tossing the stake up and down. I brightened, feeling honestly happy for him.

"Oh! You got the job! Congratulations, Alaric! That's awesome!" I gushed warmly and his smile became softer. "You should let Jenna know, she'll take you out! Which, by the way, you should totally warn her away from her cheating scumbag ex who is trying to get into her pants…"

Alaric coughed, though I think he was actually laughing, his cheeks tinged with pink. "That's, uh… It's not exactly my place to say anything."

"Mmm, you two are friends, though. I mean, she talks about you all the time." I said with a secretive grin and Alaric actually seemed a little _pleased_.

"I might not be working here yet, and so I can't actually do anything, but come Monday don't let me find you two ditching class." Alaric hastily changed the subject and I realized that Stefan had been standing quietly next to me the whole time.

Stefan grinned at him. "It won't happen again, Mr…"

"Saltzman." Alaric offered a friendly smile back. "But you can call me Ric. Is there a reason you two are out here…?"

"Oh. Um. I was waiting with her for her ride." Stefan said a bit sheepishly. "Clare can be a bit…" He gestured wildly with his hands. _Thanks_.

"This is my sister's boyfriend, Stefan." I said over him with a huff. "He's a real A-Hole with a hard on for history, so if you don't know your stuff, _watch out_. He likes to one up teachers in front of everyone." This was basically me staking him, I decided. Suck it, Stefan.

Alaric merely grinned. "Yeah? Well, we'll see about that." He gaze tilted back in my direction and he offered the stake back to me. "So… Got an interest in vampires?"

More like, they had an interest in _me_. I took the stake back from him. "At the moment, it's more of a strong _dislike_," I told him truthfully, thinking about Elijah. I was also curious as to how he'd respond. _Relief _flickered in his gaze, and I was sure I was right about him knowing Damon turned his wife. "So it can't hurt to carry around stakes. You _never _know." I added playfully and he laughed.

"I hope you're not skipping school in the pursuit of vampire slaying." Alaric said in a playful disapproving tone.

"Nah, I'm chasing down some information I've been researching for a few days now. This is purely educational." Hopefully.

I was a little startled to see the understanding wash across his face, and he nodded, accepting my reply. It left me to wonder _how much _the similarities between Isobel and I were. And why we'd share any past our appearance. I mean, I wasn't even _from _here. Though that brought in that whole nature versus—wait. No. There couldn't be any nature versus nurture because she _wasn't _my mother either. Not where I'm from.

I could feel a headache coming on.

"I know that face," Alaric sighed, almost as if he hadn't realized he was saying it out loud. "It's my cue to leave. It was nice meeting you Stefan, I hope to see you in class next Monday."

"You will. And I promise I'm not going to _one up _you or anything." Stefan said politely and I could feel his gaze burning into my head. Bitch deserved it.

"Byeee, Ricky," I grinned teasingly at him. "Make sure you let Jenna know about this great news."

"Byeee, Rissy," Alaric said back in the same teasing voice, moving toward the entrance of the building. "Stop trying to play matchmaker for your soon-to-be history teacher and your aunt, it's _weird_." He paused, clearly hesitating about something. "Also, if you happen across some vampires on your _purely educational _quest, this," he pretended to stab the air. "Is the correct way to stake one. Not that I condone you staking anyone."

"Just the undead." I nodded, trying to fight the grin that was threatening to grow. Goddamn it, I _liked _Alaric, he was seriously cool. And I'd much rather him with Jenna. They would be fun together. Playful. Happy. _Cute_.

"Just the undead." Alaric echoed with a shake of his head and a smile. He gave an awkward little wave. "Stay out of trouble."

The moment Alaric stepped into the building and was out of ear shot, Stefan turned to me. "That's the guy who…"

"Yeah. Damon turned his wife." I confirmed and Stefan groaned.

"He and Damon must never be in the same area as each other, because Damon likes to instigate confrontations." Stefan sighed, running his hand through his hair. "And he's clearly here to stake some vampires as revenge."

As if summoned, Damon's car rolled up. I patted Stefan on the chest.

"I know she won't like it, but stay extra close to Elena. Just in case." I said quietly. "_And _Jeremy."

Stefan nodded. "I won't let anything happen to either one of them," he promised. "Hopefully our new history teacher won't stake me though. _Thanks_, Damon." My lips twitched.

When the hell did Stefan get so sarcastic and sassy?

Damon, who had exited the car, tilted his head in confusion, squinting his blue eyes at Stefan. "You're welcome."

"Okay bye, Steffy! If you let anything happen to my family while I'm gone, I'll have Damon turn me into a vampire and we'll go on large killing sprees!" I chirped merrily causing Stefan to grimace, roll his eyes, and stalk back toward the building.

Haha.

I bet Damon would do it, too.

Though I doubted I'd want to live off blood for the rest of _forever_.

…Though I could still have sugar, so…

Damon opened the car door causing me to realize the only reason he exited the vehicle was to do that. My heart fluttered, warmth spreading across my chest, causing a tiny smile to form.

"For a murderous vampire, you're very gentlemanly," I said softly. Damon smirked, gently taking my hand in his and bringing it to his mouth, his blue eyes captured mine.

"Only for you," he murmured against my skin. _Gah_. My smile grew, despite myself.

"You've always acted this way," I pointed out as he tilted my hand over, kissing my palm affectionately.

"Maybe I've always liked you," his blue eyes spilled over me as he nuzzled into my hand. I curled my fingers against his jaw, lightly brushing the tips against his skin adoringly. Lifting myself slightly up on my toes, I leaned closer, taking his face in both my hands and kissing him quickly.

His fingers weaved through my hair as he pulled me closer, kissing me back before I could pull away. My heart bounced happily as I wrapped my arms around his neck, loving the way I fit against him and the way his arms around me made me feel. Damon surrounded me completely, and I delighted in every second I got to spend being this close to him. While I couldn't compare kissing Damon to anyone else, I knew I didn't _want_ to be kissed by _anyone else_ ever again. Everything about him was consuming, from his gaze, to the heat that filled me from his touches, to the way he seemed to seep into every part of me when he leaned into me, from the way he held me to him like this. Like I was _everything_.

"See?" I mumbled against his mouth as we parted. "Aren't you glad I'm coming instead? We can make out. You can't do that with Stefan." I flashed him a cheeky grin and plopped into the passenger seat.

Damon was in the driver's seat before I even finished putting on my seatbelt and was peeling out of the school parking lot just as quickly. Christ. Vampires. I pulled out my phone, and on the fourth ring Jenna answered.

"_What's wrong? Is everything okay? Oh God, has that vampire come?_" Her worried voice crinkled through the speaker and Damon snorted.

"Nope. I'm just letting you know I'm breaking your rules and I'm off to see someone who has information about what's going on." Probably. Hopefully. "And I thought you should know. So we're all on the same page."

Jenna sighed, but it sounded more like relief than anything. "_This parental guardian thing was difficult enough when everyone was just human_," she grumbled. "_Honestly, I don't feel as though I should punish you for this. It's something that has to be done and you _are _keeping me informed… So I guess that's all I can really ask for._"

_Neat_. I grinned, figuring she'd say something like that. "I also ran into Alaric. I told him you'd treat him to dinner, since he got the teaching job here and all."

"_Oh! Really? That's fantastic, I'll have to call him!_" Jenna gushed happily and my grin widened. She _so _liked him. "_I'm so happy for—wait. You did _what_?_"

"Yeah. I told him how that scumbag is trying to get into your pants—" I winced, pulling the phone from my ear at the sound of Jenna's shriek.

"_I'm hanging up!_" She shouted furiously, clearly embarrassed. "_YOU'RE STILL GROUNDED_!"

Amused as she angrily hung up on me, I quickly texted both Jeremy and Elena to tell them what was going on.

"Clarissa," Damon murmured softly as I opened a text from Noah.

"Mm?"

He snatched the phone from my hands and threw it in the backseat, his blue eyes sweeping over me. "Clarissa," he repeated my name in the same soft way and I realized he had stopped the car. He turned so he was facing me completely. "Let's have a quickie. I know you need to. I know you've been trying to keep yourself together. But you have to cry, you have to let yourself freak out, otherwise it'll boil over and with your lack of sleep…"

The façade I'd kept firmly in place cracked and I unbuckled the seatbelt, drawing my knees up, hugging them to my chest, not caring if I was wearing a stupid skirt. The terror flooded and I suddenly felt small. Helpless. The world seemed so large, overwhelming, and _dark_. It was one thing to be afraid for Elena. Elijah was a dark looming threat, but at least I knew what he was, and had some idea of what to do about him. But _this_. It could give me nightmares. It could hide things in plain sight from me. It could hide _itself_.

And it was _following _me.

And I didn't know _why_.

And I didn't _die_, but iron could break me into tiny pieces.

Everything and nothing made sense and suddenly I'd fallen down a rabbit hole to a whole new world. And I had no idea what to do.

"I'm afraid."

"I won't let anything happen to you." Damon said lowly and my heart clung to his words desperately. I couldn't stop the tears as I rested my chin on my knees. "I won't leave you, not for a single moment. I'm going to take care of this, Clary. Nothing is going to happen."

"I never had a family like this, I've never been cared about in this kind of way and I've never needed anyone like I need you. Oh God, I've sunk so low. I need you. An Everett shouldn't need anyone. Especially not a boy." I knew I was sinking into self-pity, but the fear had tangled so thickly around me that I wasn't sure what to do with myself.

"Shut up. You know you're not an Everett. You're some subhuman freak that doesn't die," Damon said dismissively, easily pulling me across the seat and onto his lap.

Surprise pulsed through the terror and misery which was falling away at his touch. Damon wrapped an arm around me as he tucked me into him, my legs draped across his, his chin resting on top of my head which was resting lightly against his chest. His calming warmth blanketed my entire body as I listening to the steady rhythm of his heart. I never had anyone to comfort me like this. Or rather, I never wanted anyone to. I was strong, I always had myself, and I never let anyone have that kind of power to come in and knock me off my feet. I was _Clarissa_, the world was at my feet. But now I was a scared seventeen year old with no power, or status, to my name and people that meant everything to me. Now I had someone that I _wanted _to hide behind, someone I wanted to cling to. I could let Damon see me at my most vulnerable, because I trusted he would pick me back up and place me back on my feet.

"And I'm not a _boy_. I'm a seriously pissed off vampire." He continued softly, the pad of his thumb drawing soothing circles almost absentmindedly on my thigh. "I am _not _going to let anything happen to you. You need me, I need you, and nothing is going to tear you from me."

I released a shaky sigh because, suddenly, I couldn't _remember _why I had let myself become so afraid, so upset. Who _cared _if I was going to rely on Damon? He was _my _vampire. I decided this was entirely the lack of sleep making me overly teary and emotional. I tilted my head up, kissing his jaw, drumming my fingers against his chest. Damon might've been basically telling me he had plans of doing terrible murderous things to whoever was messing with us, but for me that was more or less romantic and sweet. _And comforting_. I was starting to feel like I wanted more of a rated R Disney.

Like instead of Bambie's mother being shot, she's ripped apart by hungry vampires.

I also realized that my mood wasn't the only thing that had lifted.

"Here I am, crying on you, because I'm scared out of my mind, and _little Damon _is jabbing me?" I blurted out, my cheeks warming. Jesus. Christ.

"Don't ever call it _little Damon_, I swear to Christ, Clary." Damon growled, leaning back to look at me with narrowed blue eyes. I'd been talked into seeing enough chick flicks to know I got to do whatever I wanted, and if I wanted to name his _dick_, I could.

"Does my crying turn you on, Damon?" I deadpanned and he grinned impishly.

"Yeeeesss," he twirled his fingers in my hair and pulled my face closer to him, running his tongue sloppily over my cheek. I shrieked, trying to break free, a grin springing to my lips, but he held on tight. "_Delicious_. I need you, sexually, Clary! Mmm! Take me _hard_! Yes! Yes! Yes!"

The noises that were coming out of my mouth were probably the most unattractive that I've ever uttered. They were a mix between gasps for air and wheeze like laughter. I felt Damon grinning into my skin as he nuzzled into my neck, his arms coming around me. I'm not sure when he'd flipped my position, but I found that I was now straddling him. My laughing fit was calming down and I rubbed my wet cheek dry with my sleeve as he dropped his forehead to my shoulder.

I marveled over how my mood drastically fluctuated when I was with Damon. I'd always been someone with extreme moods that changed at a snap of the fingers, but it seemed to all be heightened with him. Maybe, because _he _was a vampire, and everything was _heightened_ for him, I was merely matching his pace. In the span of five minutes I'd gone from horrified, to miserable, to hysterically amused, to quietly affectionate.

I slid my fingers through his soft hair, raking my fingernails lightly across his scalp. Damon made a soft noise of pleasure.

"I'm turned on because you're on my lap, wearing a skirt," he murmured into my skin. "And I can do _this_," his warm hand tightened, squeezing my thigh, before sliding across my skin causing heat to sweep through me as he pushed my skirt up. My breath hitched and his mouth moved across my neck, landing on where my pulse fluttered. "Clarissa... Are you okay?" His blue gaze lifted to meet mine and I was taken aback by the gentle concern reflecting back at me.

Was I okay?

"It's hard to be anything _but _okay when I'm with you. You chase away all the bad." I leaned closer, wrapping my arms around his shoulders and snuggling into the crook of his neck. "Everything will always be okay when you're here. Even when I can't trust myself, I can trust you."

Damon nuzzled his nose into my hair affectionately. "Fuck, Clarissa, the shit you say to me… I feel like I shouldn't be allowed to be this happy."

I pulled back to look at him seriously. "You deserve _everything_. You should have _everything_."

"I only need _you_." Damon breathed, blue eyes bright and warm. His mouth captured mine and my heart fluttered with glee. I leaned into him, kissing him back happily. Pulling back, I gently placing my hand over his mouth.

"We can act like idiots and make out later," I murmured as he gently kissed my palm, slowly making his way down my wrist. "I really _need _to… we have to…" I couldn't _think _as he kissed my tattoo, my pulse humming against his lips. Damon's mouth continued down, his fangs scraping across my flesh. "The information… _Damon_." I moaned, my eyes fluttering shut, as his fangs bit into my skin gently.

Pleasure rippled through me, heat washing across my body as everything lit up with a soft urgency. My body seemed to become so much more aware of his, and every part of me that touched him ached, demanding of his attention. His fingertips moved across my thigh causing another moan as pleasure prickled everywhere he touched. It wasn't enough to make me feel like I had to rip my clothes off and jump him, but it was on the verge of _becoming _slightly more heated. I wasn't sure why he was doing this, especially since we'd wasted enough time as it was.

"You know why I'm doing this," he murmured against my wrist and I peeled my eyes open. His half lidded blue ones met mine. That's right, I realized, he could feel everything I was now.

"In hopes I'll be seduced and throw my virginity at you?" I wondered, trying to sound sarcastic and not at all breathy. I bit down on my lower lip as my wrist pulsed, throbbing with pain. I _liked _that he left a bite mark, I liked that it _hurt_… Damon's gaze was darkening.

"I'm trying to be romantic, Clary," his voice was thick and hungry.

"Romantic." I echoed hazily, trying to think through the cloud of heat that rolled over my thoughts. "You bit me and are feeding off me. _Romantic_."

"You make it difficult to do Disney." Damon growled, jerking my wrist upward and sinking his fangs back into the wound. I gave a soft cry of pain which trailed off into one of pleasure. Oh _God_. I squirmed and he groaned against my skin, grabbing my hip and stilling me. "Yes," he hissed, dark blue eyes clawing at me. "Continue to do that, Clary, because it's making the situation _so much better_. I swear it starts off Disney, something really nauseatingly romantic and sweet, maybe with a sing-a-long, and then _fuck_, there goes Ariel, being ripped to shreds by sharks. Which turns her on."

I tried. I really, really, tried but I couldn't keep the laughter at bay. Damon, who was clearly feeling the effects of my amusement, was fighting a grin as he shoved me from his lap. I rolled into the passenger seat, tears of mirth forming.

"I was—I was j-just th-thinking that be-before!" I managed to choke out between the laughter. Damon rolled his blue eyes, starting the car. "We'd make the first rated R Disney movie."

"It'll be called: Sex." He deadpanned, squinting his eyes, and another round of hysterical laughter hit me. In a mocking, high pitched, voice he cried: "Oh God, yes, Damon, YES! Tear into my flesh like a savage beast! Smear my blood all over my body like finger-paint!"

It took me a good three minutes to calm down from that.

"You know…" Damon said after a bit of silence, blue eyes sliding in my direction. "You really don't own a single solid red article of clothing. The most I could find was polka-dots." I blinked.

"When did you go through my clothes?"

"When you decided to research for days on end and ignore me." Damon said with a shrug and I frowned. "I know that Edward Cullen is fine with watching Bella sleep, but after five seconds of staring at you, I got bored. I went through your underwear drawer. And then I went through all your clothes."

"I just get focused." I defended.

Damon snorted. "It's _beyond_ being focused. It's obsessive. I could strut around naked, bounce around your bed, try on your clothes, and I got _no _reaction." I felt a pout coming on. He tried on my clothes? "That's right, and you missed _all _of it. It'll never happen again. It was a once in a life time thing. …That Jeremy stumbled in on."

The amusement couldn't override the surprise and Damon squinted his eyes at me, clearly picking up on the fact that I picked up on his usage of Jeremy's actual name rather than _Pretend Brother_. A tiny smile spilled across my face.

"Shut up."

"I didn't say anything."

"You're feeling it loudly."

"That's your fault." I said happily.

"Yeah. Well. Since I've been stuck hanging out with him, he showed me how to make custom ringtones for my phone." Damon's lips twitched upward. Christ. "Now you won't be the only one who is obnoxious. _Call me_." I merely stared at him and his grin fell. "Call me!"

"Hey I just met you!" I sang back. "And this is craaaazy!"

"Call my damn phone!" Damon cut in impatiently and I threw my hands up, huffing. He huffed back and I unbuckled my seatbelt. "What are you doing?"

"Getting my phone," I said, crawling onto the console and reaching into the backseat. "You threw it, remember?"

The car jerked to a stop so suddenly that I screeched, flailing ungracefully into the backseat, smacking my face against the leather seats painfully. I moaned in pain. Damon was such a fucking dick. He laughed.

"Whoops."

_Whoops _my ass!

"You're the jerk, jerk, jerk of the week! You're a jerk and it's your week!" I snapped back. This song was going to be his next ringtone, so help me. I rubbed my stinging face, groping blindly on the seat for my phone. My skirt lifted slightly and I spun around, smacking his hand and tearing my skirt from his fingers. Damon's lips twitched into a larger smirk.

"You really like to match _everything_." He commented on as I snatched my phone and climbed back into the front. "Aw, don't be pissed, hummingbird, can you really blame me? Your ass was in the air and I _hate _controlling myself. You shouldn't have been crawling around back there."

I was going to stake Stefan. And then I would stake Damon. Right in the nuts. Damon raised his eyebrows at me, and I scoffed, remembering that he was able to feel everything that I was. Jerk. I flipped open my phone, dialing his number.

"_I called her on the phone and she touched herself!_" Damon's phone went off. That son of a bitch. I stared at him angrily. "_She touched herself. She toooouched heeeerself_! _I called her—_" I slammed my phone shut as Damon grinned cheekily at me.

"You think it's hilarious." He said confidently as I folded my arms over my chest. I didn't care if he could feel the slight amusement brimming under the irritation. I was angry _right now_, and that was that! Damon pried my arms apart and laced his fingers with mine, which, admittedly, sent a wave of giddiness through me. "Don't you want to hear about the guy we're meeting?"

Excitement drowned out the irritation and I bounced in my seat, gripping his hand back. I didn't care if Damon was smirking, looking smug and superior! Information! I was going to be getting information! All for me!

Apparently the fucker was an hour away. An _hour_. This was the longest hour of my entire existence. According to the address Jeremy's hacker friend retrieved, we were currently parked outside of the apartment building the guy lived in. According to what the guy emailed back and forth with Jeremy and Damon, he was a vampire named Slater with an obsession for vampire history and was willing to meet at a local coffee shop where he'd educate us on anything we were curious about (for a fee). He even gave the hours and days he was usually there.

So obviously we were going to show up while he was home and beat the information out of him instead.

We're such decent people.

"We should synch up." I said distractedly, eyeing the building as we stood outside his car. "So we're completely on par with one another."

"I don't know if that's a good idea right now." Damon's fingers danced over my skin and I leaned into him. "I'm feeling a lot of things right now. It might…" he trailed off as I offered my wrist, gazing up at him. "Everything I feel is much more heightened, Clary. It'll bounce around you and fling back at me. And then I might do something crazy."

"If we _are _walking into a trap, wouldn't it be easier for you to convey things to me without having to speak out loud?"

My logic was flawless and Damon squinted his eyes at me, unable to rebuff it. I grinned as he bit into my wrist, the familiar jolt of pain tangled with pleasure rippling through me. His eyes fell shut as he pressed my wrist tighter against his mouth. I shifted impatiently, wanting to go seek out this Slater guy. Damon growled, lowering my wrist.

"Let me enjoy myself, damn it," he grumbled, biting into his own wrist and offering it to me. God we were so fucked up. Damon's lips twitched as he took my wrist in his hand again, bringing it to his mouth as I brought his to mine.

Like seriously fucked up.

I had no interest in ever being with anyone, and when I do, we do this shit. Goddamn. I was never meant to have a normal life.

The first few seconds of drinking his blood is always the worst, though I guess at least I still have that for normalcy. I didn't think I'd ever like the taste of it, even if I _was _a vampire. But after the initial few sips, it was beyond anything I could ever describe. It wasn't the _taste _that was rapturous. It was feeling _pure _Damon, and the way his blood fizzled and crackled under my skin, lighting and singing where we were connected. I could feel the sheer ecstasy from his end that apparently accompanies drinking blood. I guess all those smutty romance novels had at least gotten that right about vampires.

I gasped, drawing back, as a cold fury and lingering fear crushed into me, making my head spin. I felt Damon's nervousness briefly before he caught me, easily pulling me against him. I knew he'd been serious about how he felt when it came to _whatever _it was that we were dealing with outside of Elijah, but I didn't realize this dark mood had been just below the surface. I _always _considered myself able to read him correctly, how could I let myself be blind to this…? Amusement and a soft fondness twinkled through him, bleeding into me.

"You're sleep deprived and frightened, you _need _me to make it all better. So I did." Damon brushed some strands of hair from my face. "I'm pissed and I'm going to be pissed for a while, there's nothing you can do about it." Of course there was. I was Clarissa. If he was going to focus on taking care of me, I'd focus on taking care of _him_.

"Okay." I still felt dizzy, fighting to find myself through all _him _that pelted into me. I straightened. Damon _needed _me to be strong and take the onslaught with Clarissa style, and so I would. Gently, I took his hand in mine, and smiled faintly, focusing on every positive and warm feeling I felt for him. Sparks and fizzles of delight danced at our joined hands. "Ready?"

Damon tilted his head, gazing down at me. I could feel the wonderment and the relief that floated through me as his anger coiled, slinking back. He intertwined our fingers, bringing my hand up to his mouth and planting a soft kiss on the back of it as his fondness brimmed. His lips against my skin sent jolts of warmth through me, and I wondered if I'd ever get used to being connected to him like this.

I was having a spastic fit by the time we reached Slater's door and it deeply amused me that Damon was actually considering snapping my neck and leaving me in the car. Not only did he threaten it, but I could _feel _it. I couldn't help it! I was so freakin' close to getting these damn answers, _finally_, it was like taking shots of sugar straight in the vein! I reached for the door and faltered as my hand hovered. Confusion tugged between us as the feeling of uncomfortable reluctance grew. I glanced at the door and shock flooded through me and into him.

Damon's fingers curled around my elbow, jerking me backwards as I gawked at the door. _Iron_. The door handles were made out of friggin' _iron_!

_Which meant Slater knew what I was_!

Damon's anger couldn't outweigh the glee that burned hotly. Dear God, I may get _all _the answers I was searching for today! I spun around, grinning up at him excitedly, soothing back the dark rage and Damon rolled his eyes.

"Only you would be excited that this asshole literally has death waiting at his door." Damon murmured in an attempt to be irritable but I could feel my own giddiness bouncing through him. "Stop it."

"Knock! Knock! Knock, knock, knock!" I gushed, bouncing on my heels.

* * *

Slater was having a pretty decent Friday and was relatively excited about the Mr. Walter Gropius who he had found via Craigslist. Slater prided himself about knowing almost everything _about _everything there was to know. He was a powerhouse of knowledge, and the prospect of being able to share his knowledge to fellow curious immortals left him feeling important. His fingertips hovered over the keyboard when knocking interrupted his thought process. His gaze flitted to the time on his desktop as he sprang to his feet. It was many hours too early for his girlfriend to be showing up…

Upon opening the door, Slater's mouth fell open in surprise upon seeing the face on the other side. _The _Damon Salvatore! At _his _door! He'd be _lying _if he wasn't having a miniature fanboy moment, he had read so much about this vampire! Damon Salvatore was like that cool guy at high school that everybody knows about, and the vampire certainly dressed to his bad boy reputation.

"Damon Salvatore," Slater greeted almost in an awestruck way, a wide grin flying across his face as said vampire narrowed his blue eyes. But it was like word vomit and Slater couldn't stop. "Turned 1864, Mystic Falls, by Katherine Pierce, AKA Katerina Petrova." All in all, Slater was pleased with himself.

And hoped Damon Salvatore was at least a little bit impressed. Judging by the look he was receiving, the raven haired vampire wasn't. But Slater had always been shit with first impressions.

"Do you watch Vampire Diaries, too?" An amused, sweet, voice chirped, tugging Slater's attention down toward a small girl standing slightly behind Damon Salvatore, a secretive smile spread across her adorable face. "I wonder who he ships you with."

Slater jolted with surprise as her sea glass eyes flickered in his direction, the colors blue and gray rolling into one another like waves. He immediately knew what she was. "_You _cannot come inside," he said quickly, nearly bursting with excitement. He had only come across a Fae once, by accident, and that Fae looked _far _from human without her Glamour.

The older vampire scoffed and brushed past him, sauntering into his apartment. "You wanted to meet us." Damon Salvatore told him with a sarcastic grin and Slater turned around, staring at the other vampire in giddy surprise.

He had been messaging _Damon Salvatore_?

Could this day get _any _better?

"What the hell?" The Fae gave a cry of frustration, trapped in his doorway and Slater grinned in faint amusement. He hadn't invited her _in_, didn't she _know_…? She narrowed her eyes and he felt an edge of nervousness. An angry Fae was deadly. "Why can't I come inside?"

"I told you, you're not invited." Slater said patiently, an idea spinning in his mind that he was becoming more and more hopeful about. Did this little Fae not know what she _was_…? She blinked owlishly, eyes round, her lip jutting out into a pout.

"I'm not a vampire." The little Fae said, confusion dancing in her voice.

"And even if you were, _he's _a vampire," Damon Salvatore tilted his head and Slater was in paradise. They had no idea what she _was_! "You wouldn't need an invite."

"Her kind _has_ to be invited in just like ours," Slater said, leaning against the arm of his lounge chair, crossing his arms over his chest in what he hoped looked cool. He had practiced this! He offered what he hoped was a cool-guy lazy smirk. "But unlike vampires, they can be uninvited at any time, and it doesn't matter if the owner of the home is living or not."

Her pretty mouth fell open with her outraged surprise and, to Slater's delight, Damon Salvatore snorted. He just still couldn't get over that he had _the _Damon Salvatore in his house! And he had a Fae with him! Both of who obviously were seeking him out for _his _information!

"That's…! No! I've walked into people's homes before without an invite!" The little Fae chirped, placing her hands on her hips, her sharp intelligent eyes assessing Slater. He knew she would find him worthy of whatever she was assessing.

He _knew _things. And above all, the Fae valued that.

"From what I've learned, your kind doesn't need it to be verbal like our kind does, as you take _everything _as an invitation." Slater explained warmly. "I'm pretty sure the being uninvited part has to be verbal, though."

"That sounds like you." Damon Salvatore was clearly amused. "You think you own everything."

"Laugh it up, Salvatore." The little Fae tilted her gleaming sea glass eyes back toward Slater innocently. "Invite me inside, please?"

"Nice try," Slater laughed. "But you can't Glamour me, little Fae, I wear four leaf clovers on me at all times."

"Glamour?" The older vampire was looking at him curiously now, head tilted to the side, and Slater allowed a moment of pride to seep through him.

"It's a little bit like compulsion, from what I know about it," Slater said, pretending it was an offhanded thing to know, when it reality he was certain he was one of the few who even knew the Fae _existed_.

"I don't compel people." The little Fae pouted in his doorway while her vampire companion eyed her thoughtfully.

"Unlike compulsion, Glamour can't _make _people do anything. It isn't _mind control_. It's just… sort of like a psychic link, in which the Glamoured person feels like they _want _to do as the Fae requests, though they have complete free will to refuse." Slater leaned off the arm of the chair, clapping his hands together. "I'll let you inside if you answer a question. I know your kind likes to play with the truth, but you are unable to lie, so answer me straight: Do you or Damon have any plans of harming me?"

"Keeping _her _out isn't really going to help _you_ out," Damon Salvatore murmured in a low, threatening, tone and Slater turned his eyes toward the older vampire who squinted back at him challengingly.

"Between the two of you, I'd rather her be outside of my home." Slater said honestly. "She's more dangerous to me than you are." He had seen firsthand the destruction of a miffed Fae. "Little Fae…"

"My name is Clarissa," she corrected which surprised him. She was willingly giving him her name…?

"Slater." He introduced himself quickly and her lips twitched, amusement sparkling in those mischievous eyes.

"I know. And to answer your question: _no_. Neither I, nor Damon, nor _anyone _we know have any plans to hurt, harm, kill or cause you any ill intent. We're merely curious." Clarissa chirped with a warm smile and Slater relaxed slightly.

"I should have known." He nodded with a small laugh. "The Fae love knowledge. Come inside, Clarissa. I had to ask, you understand."

"Do you intend _Clary_ harm?" Damon Salvatore asked with raised eyebrows as Clarissa gazed longingly at the ground, as though unsure she believed she'd be able to actually enter. "Couldn't help but notice the iron handles."

"Oh! No, no, no! I'm so sorry, I hope I haven't offended you," Slater said quickly, looking back toward Clarissa who seemed oblivious to the conversation, bouncing into the room with a delighted look on her face. _Fae_.

"How did you know what I was?" Clarissa wondered with a curious lit in her sweet chiming voice, eyes bright as she lifted them to meet Slater's.

"Your eyes." Slater informed her pleasantly, flitting quickly into his kitchen and flying through the drawers.

He wasn't exactly sure the proper way to go about having a Fae in his home, but he was betting that the effort was all that mattered, especially since it appeared she knew very little about herself. Finding a few pixie sticks (sugar was something he loved), he returned to the living room, and offered the bright pink and yellow pixie sticks to her. Damon Salvatore eyed them suspiciously while Clarissa brightened.

"How did you two, uh, meet?" Needing to know _everything _was also a bit of a curse, and he couldn't help but ask. From what he knew, the Fae were disinterested in the mortals and other immortals. Clarissa fluttered happily to him, accepting the pixie sticks with glee.

"He killed me." Clarissa said with a sweet smile, pretending to snap a neck. "But I got back up." If she hadn't known she wasn't human, that was probably what triggered the discovery. And what a way to find out.

"Ah, well, good thing you didn't try to drink her blood, huh?" Slater said with a teasing grin, though he knew both of them would not understand why. As he predicted, they both turned to him curiously. "Well… I guess it's good you two are here before you tried. While we," he gestured toward himself and Damon Salvatore. "Are child of the night, Fae are children of the day. It's how _I _met my first Fae, I was out with a friend—many, _many_, years ago, when we were both newly turned in the '70's. My friend had attempted to feed on this girl… and, well… It set him on fire. It was like he had swallowed _sunlight_, he said. It damn near killed him and he insulted the Fae… Safe to say, he's long dead."

"Are they able to hide objects in plain sight?" Damon Salvatore asked suddenly, drawing Slater from the memory completely. "Can they make themselves invisible?"

Slater was pleased. He knew the answers to these. "Yes, to both. It's Fae Glamour. Hence why I wear a four leaf clover, because, for whatever reason, it breaks the illusion."

Damon Salvatore narrowed his eyes thoughtfully as Clarissa happily downed both pixie sticks within seconds, eyes glowing as she turned toward Slater. He had to admit, when they weren't furious, Fae were very adorable. There was a warm kindness to Clarissa that made him like her, and he suddenly wanted to impress her. He wanted to impress the _both _of them.

"So… What do you want to know about Elijah Mikaelson or the Petrova doppelgänger?" Slater decided to get straight to business and Clarissa perked up immediately, gray rolling into blue eyes glinting.

"_Everything_. Who is Elijah? How do you spell his last name?" Clarissa chirped, fluttering closer to him with wide, curious, eyes. Slater was feeling extremely important now. He'd always wanted to be the molder of young minds, always wanted to become a professor. And he especially liked the fact that Clarissa said _everything_.

Because he could tell her _everything_ and _more_.

"M-I-K-A-E-L-S-O-N. He's one of the Original vampires, he and his siblings were the first. They were turned, by means I yet know, somewhere in the late tenth century."

A dark smile blossomed across Clarissa's face as Damon Salvatore groaned.

"Of _all _the vampires you had to come across," Damon Salvatore snipped a bit moodily and Slater's gaze flickered between them with growing curiosity. "You decide to be difficult and come across one of the _first_."

"You _met _Elijah Mikaelson?" Slater asked, a bit too rushed and too giddily, but he couldn't _help _it! Upon seeing Clarissa's open dislike, he understood. "Ah. He insulted you. He either doesn't know about Fae or hadn't realized you were one. Elijah is… Very old school, very noble, and if he knew what you were, I'm sure he would immediately make amends."

"Or he'd simply know how to kill her." Damon Salvatore said flatly rising Slater's curiosity to unbearable heights.

"…He's not after you, is he?" Slater asked after a moment, warily. "Because I won't get involved. Don't involve me. Elijah Mikaelson… Well, he's a pretty decent vampire when it comes to vampires, especially compared to his brother, but betraying him is a death sentence to you and everyone you involve yourself with."

Slater suddenly wanted to know what _sort _of relationship these two had. Clarissa might've been raised human, and believed herself to be one, but she was _Fae_. To fight her nature would to be to deny breathing by simply holding your breath, she could _try _but it wouldn't last long. He knew enough about Damon Salvatore to know the vampire would get along fairly decently with a Fae, as morality and humanity meant very little to him. Was it a friendship born out of the mutual glee of mischief? Slater knew Fae preferred to keep the appearance of children, it made their dark mischief appear less malicious, and they were often protected by other supernatural beings and mortals because of it. Humans were _very_ susceptible to the child-like appearance and behavior of Fae. Slater didn't know if this was done out of pure amusement and the fact that Fae enjoyed being bestowed gifts, affection and had a particular obsession with sugar or if Fae _needed _the protection. If Clarissa had angered an Original and was now fleeing, Slater didn't doubt she would seek the protection of other immortals and humans alike, Glamouring them to take the fall for her.

And there was a slight edge of protectiveness that surrounded the older vampire, especially with how his gaze seemed to drift back to the little Fae. Was she using him as a protective guardian? With everything he knew about Damon Salvatore, he highly doubted that would fly with the older vampire. Though it was entirely possible that she was using Fae Glamour. …Though if she hadn't known what she was…

"_He _wants something that belongs to _me_." Clarissa chirped with an angry huff, her ocean eyes flashing with irritation as she pouted and Slater froze. If Elijah didn't know about Fae, or knew that she was one, he could very well be starting a war.

And a war with Fae would spill into the mortal world.

It would be pure chaos.

"You have to tell him what you are," Slater said quickly, feeling a little panicked and _excited_. "Fae are protective of their own, even though for whatever reason you hadn't known you were one. I know that Fae consider their rules to be applied to everyone, and the biggest offense is to take something belonging to Fae. You _must _tell Elijah, you _must _explain, because if he slights _you_, he slights all Fae. It would become a war and Fae are not very forgiving."

"If I kill Elijah, will every vampire that was sired through his bloodline die?" Clarissa didn't seemed bothered by what Slater had just said and Slater, in turn, was surprised he'd never thought to find that out.

Something he would now dedicate himself to learning.

"I…"

"No." Damon Salvatore said with a shake of his head. "Killing one vampire won't kill the vampires that were _turned _by them."

"But if he's an _Original _the rules may be different…" Slater said thoughtfully. "You can't kill an Original the normal way either. It has to be with a special white oak. I don't know _why_. I also know another vampire can't be the one to do it, either." This morning Slater had considered this to be a pretty average day, now he was conspiring about how to kill _Elijah Mikaelson_ with Damon Salvatore and a Fae.

This was maybe the most excited day he'd had since being turned.

"You're here for a _month_," Damon Salvatore said with a scoff, pinning Clarissa with a look. It was strange, but it was partly annoyed, partly amused, and partly _fond_. "A _month _and already you're starting shit. You can't even walk down a street without catching the attention of the first vampire ever who needs a special kind of stake to be killed!"

"I'm like a hundred percent sure it would've happened anyway!" Clarissa tossed her hands up in the air. "This is like a season worthy villain right there, it was unavoidable, D! It's written in plot! We just happened to stumble upon it and instead of it being like '_surprise I exist_', we can be prepared! So there!"

"What does Elijah want that belongs to you?" Slater asked softly drawing their attention back to him. The two glanced at each other. He watched as they communicated something without words which he marveled over. There was still so much about Fae that Slater didn't know.

"The doppelgänger." Damon Salvatore said shortly and Slater sputtered, his mouth falling open for the second time that day.

"The—?" They had to be _kidding_ him. "As in—? You…?" Clarissa dropped her panda bag into Damon Salvatore's arms and he rolled his eyes as she went through it, pulling out a flip phone.

"She's my sister," Clarissa said dolefully, fluttering toward Slater, holding her phone up. Slater, with a spinning head, gently took the phone from the little Fae and was sure if he wasn't already dead, he'd drop where he stood.

"Katerina?" Was it really _her_? It couldn't be!

"No. Elena."

"_Human_?" Slater's eyebrows flew upward as he stared down at the picture of the two smiling dark haired girls on the tiny screen.

"Yes." Clarissa confirmed, taking the phone back from him. "I mean, other than the fact that she looks like Katherine, there's nothing supernatural about her."

"Why does Elijah want her? Why did he want Katherine?" Damon Salvatore demanded and Slater blinked, dazed, his thoughts turning toward two friends of his that would strongly benefit from knowing there was a human doppelgänger.

"Wow." Slater ran his fingers through his hair as Clarissa stared up at him with wide innocent eyes. Why this Fae was claiming the doppelgänger was her sister was a topic they'd get to later. The moon and sun curse was one of his favorite topics to rave about. "Uh, before I get into that, why don't we sit down?"

Slater gestured for them to follow him into the kitchen and he watched with slight amusement as Clarissa bounced on the balls of heels, prancing around Damon Salvatore like a child. The older raven haired vampire didn't seem fazed and actually pulled a chair out for the Fae in an act that was so simple, yet intimate and gentlemanly that it was almost _out of character _from everything that Slater had come to learn about Damon Salvatore. Fascinated, he watched as the Fae gazed adoringly up at the older vampire and Slater was beginning to suspect that these two had known one another for some years now.

It was in the way they moved and reacted around one another, seamlessly, fluidly, as though they knew the other's every thought, as though they were the same being. There was a softness to them, as though they lived outside of the flow of time, outside of the world, in their own. Slater faltered, fingers hesitating over the coffee maker, as he gazed at the odd, beautiful, pair. He realized, instantly, he had to be a bit more careful, because these two were _dangerous_ together. They were staring back at him and he flushed, caught openly gawking.

"Coffee?" He offered before pausing. He almost forgot what his guests _were_. "Blood? Sugar?"

"Tell us a story, Slater." Clarissa requested sweetly, eyes glowing, as she swung her locked ankles back and forth, the tips of her platform converse brushing across the floor.

"Fae love stories," Slater nodded, plucking his green mug up and sitting across the odd pair. "Where to start… I guess, we'll start with Katerina Petrova. The year is 1492 and she is a human Noblewoman in England, catching the eye of our Elijah Mikaelson who introduces her to his brother, Klaus." Slater began, leaning forward in his seat, Clarissa and Damon Salvatore's attention completely his. "Now, at this point, both brothers have been vampires for roughly five hundred years. From what I know, both of them had a certain fondness for Katerina…"

"Of course they did." Damon Salvatore said with a scoff, leaning back in his seat as irritation flickered across his face.

"It would suggest that Katherine might've been a doppelgänger as well," Clarissa murmured thoughtfully. "She catches their attention because, possibly, hundreds of years before her there was another. You vampires tend to stay deeply in love forever." Damon Salvatore rolled his eyes.

"Now _that _is something that I've been looking into, but haven't been able to find anything to support that theory." Slater said with a small grin. "The only ones who would be able to tell us are the Mikaelsons. And so," he brought the mug to his lips, taking a few sips of the hot drink. "Katerina becomes involved with Klaus. It appears innocent enough, but Katerina was a very smart girl. She soon discovered Klaus' plot to use her as a sacrifice in the moon-and-sun curse." He paused for dramatic effect and was pleased when neither of them interrupted, merely stared at him intently. "Stealing the moonstone, which would break the curse, she, with the help of a vampire named Trevor, fled from Klaus. Trevor brought her to a vampire named Rose who fed her vampire blood after the first suicide attempt. The second suicide attempt was by hanging, and with Rose's blood in her system, Katerina was turned into a vampire. Klaus has been hunting her for the past five hundred years. She perished in a fire in 1864… Or maybe not. There's whispers that she's hiding out in a tomb under where the church was…" Neither of them seemed surprised by the last bit of information and Slater frowned.

"Just say it." Damon Salvatore snapped, blue eyes fixed on Clarissa who was dancing her fingers across the table. "I know you're bursting with little ideas, so just fucking say it, Clary. _Enlighten _me."

"It doesn't mean KP didn't love you." Clarissa said quietly, staring back at him seriously. Slater watched quietly. "But any love she'd felt, would have taken a backseat. She's not going to let something like love rule her, and I don't doubt that she could love you and be the one to stake you in the heart if it came down to you and her."

Damon Salvatore and Slater stared at Clarissa in shock, both for different reasons, but Clarissa's expression only remained grimly apologetic.

"Let's rewind a few years before Slater's story starts. We have a young sixteen-seventeen year old pregnant girl giving birth and immediately disowned and banished from her country. Which means two things, either she was deceived by a man, fell in love, and was left flat and pregnant," she hesitated, her fingers stilling. "Or she was raped."

Damon Salvatore growled lowly as Slater stared at Clarissa in wonderment. Where did she get this information from…?

"Having your child taken from you, your heart broken, thrown from your own country by your own family can do some serious damage. Whether she fell in love with Klaus, or Elijah, or she was using them out of a desperate situation, I don't _know_. I do know that it's going to do something to you if you find out you're yet again deceived by men. Not only _that_, but it's the fourteen hundreds and now vampires are coming into play. It's a living nightmare that drove her to suicide only to find, she's _still alive _and one of those evil creatures. Spending the next five hundred years running from a man who most likely went back and slaughtered her entire family? KP lost a large part of herself and she'll never let anyone close again. Her self-preservation is beyond anything we can comprehend." Clarissa tilted her head in a very bird like fashion.

"What the hell is the moonstone and this curse?" Damon Salvatore demanded, squinting his eyes back to Slater, clearly ticked off. Slater jumped. He had been so enthralled with the Fae's theory of Katerina's character that he almost forgot Damon Salvatore was there. He felt a little wistful. He and Clarissa would make a fantastic team.

He'd be able to get the facts, the history, and Clarissa would piece it all together with plausible _why's_. Her ability to read into what people were like was incredible.

"The moon-and-sun curse was placed on vampires and werewolves—"

"_Werewolves_?" Damon Salvatore cut in, furrowing his brow, as though what Slater had said was the furthest thing from possible. "They don't exist."

"They _do _actually," Slater corrected with a grin. "They're all but extinct now. There was a few packs of them living up in this town in California a few years ago which seems to be another beacon of supernatural activity—" The sheer murderous look the older vampire was giving Slater was cause enough to switch back to the curse. "Right. Okay. As I was saying, maaany, many years ago, there was an Aztec shaman who placed the curse of the moon and the sun on werewolves and vampires, causing vampires to be cursed to be burned by sunlight and werewolves only able to transform under the full moon. There are three key factors in breaking the curse. The blood of a werewolf, the blood of a vampire and the blood of the doppelgänger. Of course, you need the moonstone and a witch to undo the curse."

"Bullshit." Clarissa slammed her hands down on the table, bouncing up. "That's bullshit! Elijah can walk around in daylight. What use is that to him? There has to be something _more_."

"Break the curse for the vampires to keep it from the werewolves." Slater said, feeling it was the most logical thought process one could come to. Damon Salvatore tilted his head toward Clarissa, as though able to hear what she was thinking, a look of consideration and then understanding washing across his face.

"Clary is right…" Damon Salvatore said after a moment, eyes shifting from Clarissa back to Slater. "That _is _bullshit. If that was all they were aiming for, they wouldn't be hunting Katherine or now Elena like this. It's _personal_. Klaus' anger is personal."

"It's a cover story." Slater realized, stunned. "What's one way to ensure you'd find the moonstone and the doppelgänger? By making them valuable to _everyone_." Could that be true? Or was he just being swept up in the thrill of discovering something _groundbreaking_?

"So now there's two of them. Two all-powerful asshole vampires after us." Clarissa growled, rubbing her temples as though she had a headache. "Fuckin' thanks, KP."

"We'll kill them." Damon Salvatore assured the Fae almost as though talking about murder would soothe her. Though, Slater suspected, it probably did.

"They need a special white oak to be killed." Slater reminded softly, his mind reeling still.

"Do you know where we can find that?" Damon Salvatore wondered with raised eyebrows as he stood, an arm draped over the pouting Fae's shoulders as he held her bag. Slater stood as well, shaking his head.

"Planning to kill an Original or even searching on how to isn't something I'd ever do." Slater admitted, leading the two back into the living room. He had a feeling their little chat was over. _For today_. He sort of hoped they'd come to him again.

Damon Salvatore was suddenly in front of him and Slater stumbled into the wall. "You know _too _much," the older vampire said and with horror, Slater realized he was holding a stake. "And now you know Clary is Fae-like, which Elijah can use against us, and you also know about the Elena being a doppelgänger."

"I won't say anything, I swear." Slater said quickly, his heart pounding in his chest fearfully. "She said—she promised you meant no harm!"

Damon grinned darkly. "She lies." The dark haired vampire informed him pleasantly and Slater felt a flash of disbelief fill him.

"Wait, no—!"

_Pain _tore through him and Slater choked, unable to bring air into his lungs as the wood pierced through his chest. There was so much he had yet to do with his undead life, so much he had hoped to do, to become. The world spun violently around him, his vision swarming with black. _No_…

* * *

Slater _knew _so much about everything, and while I could admit that would be useful, he had to die. _Had _to.

A flash of unease and hesitance flared and quickly fell away as a startling understanding swept through on both our parts. I realized Damon wasn't going to give a damn if I didn't feel guilty and he realized I wasn't going to suddenly be appalled with what he'd done. It had been established before, many times over, but it didn't really _hit home _so fully until now.

We could be ourselves.

_Completely _ourselves.

We could do, say, _feel _any way we wanted around each other. I'd never been so accepted and understood before and it was mindboggling how simple it was. I could just _be _myself and I was still so wanted, so needed, so accepted. I didn't _have _to feel guilty that he was dead, or feel guilty for not feeling guilty. I could just _be_. I could really, honestly, be _myself _with Damon. All the time. And it would always be okay.

Suddenly, I wanted him.

_Needed him_.

Suddenly I couldn't remember why I ever had been holding off.

I wanted Damon.

Right here.

Right now.

I wanted him to tear my clothes off with his teeth and fuck me on the floor. I wanted him to consume me, scorch everything inside of me so that only he existed. I wanted him to sink his fangs into my flesh, I wanted to dig my nails his. I wanted it rough, I wanted it messy, I wanted it to hurt.

I didn't want Disney. I wanted _Damon_. Pure, raw, aggressive, _Damon_.

His blue eyes were darkening as his gaze burned into me intensely, surprise pulsing and flickering into a blazing lust that matched mine. His ungodly mouth sprang into a feral smirk that sent a shiver of maddening heat through me.

"Ah, ah, ah, you're supposed to be _little miss Disney_," he tutted, his voice a mixture of husky and taunting, yet so fucking _silky_.

His half lidded gaze seared my skin as he raked his devouring blue eyes across my form. I could feel his dark intentions rising hungrily as he stalked closer. I was rooted to the floor, staring back at him, a flicker of hungry excitement flashing through me and I couldn't even say who it belonged to as the haze rolled over me, blanketing me completely. I couldn't _think_. I could hardly even stand up right, let alone breathe. I needed Damon to touch me, it was starting to become painful.

"I hadn't known," he continued in a low voice, circling around me slowly, his breath hot in my ear. I was sure that despite the vervain, Damon would be able to compel me to do anything he wanted. "That _murder_," leisurely, he pulled the zipper on my hoodie lower. "Would have you," he tore the hoodie from me and spun me around, grasping my chin tightly. My body jolted as a shock of pleasure pulsed at his touch, his blood dancing at the contact. "_Wet _for me." His voice dipped into a predatory growl and I whimpered, desire coursing through me so hotly that all thoughts but what Damon could _do _to me instantly fled.

I felt his dark glee twisting around me as his hunger increased, biting through me and tightening the coil of burning lust around me so tightly that I trembled. I grasped his shirt, releasing another whimper as my entire body ached desperately for his touch. God, I didn't _care_, I just wanted him. I wanted him so bad it _hurt_. Damon merely stood calmly as I clung to him, almost as though he were completely unfazed. But I could feel his heart bouncing against mine in my chest, I could feel how dangerously close to the edge he was. He was a breath away from losing control and I could _feel _how badly he wanted to bite me.

The idea of it caused me to moan and searing lust crushed into me, sizzling in my veins. I curled my fingers in his shirt desperately, my knees buckling, as the penetrating blazing intensity of need settled uncomfortably in the pit of my stomach. I ached. I _ached _so bad I couldn't stand it. I was going to die if he didn't touch me! Damon merely smirked down at me.

With a frustrated growl, I threw my arms around his neck, bouncing upward and wrapping my legs around his waist. His mouth was on mine instantly, kissing me with intense fervor, his searing fingers gripped my thighs, sliding across my skin, leaving an aching, burning, trail as his blood sizzled and danced and lit up at his hot touch. I whimpered, my fingers winding tightly in his dark hair, tugging and pulling as his teeth and tongue mashed against mine. A spark of hissing hunger ripped through me, he _liked _it when I tugged on his hair. He liked the pain the way I did.

Damon roughly shoved me down onto what felt like a couch, his mouth only leaving mine for a second before he was crawling back on top of me again, his wet, hot, tongue sliding over mine messily, aggressively. As though we were pressed for time, as though this was the last time we'd ever be able to touch like this, and if he stopped, even for a nanosecond, the world would burn. He kissed me like I was all he'd ever need, and everything inside of him echoed the thought loudly. Every fevered touch had jolts of pleasure bleeding back into me and I arched my back, moaning helplessly as the world spun and faded away.

He groaned and grabbed my hips tightly, jerking me further down the couch, pressing himself tightly between my legs as he hiked the skirt up further. I gasped against his mouth, a crackling lust striking me to the core at the feeling of _him._ I could feel him through the fabric of his jeans and a smug haughtiness flared from his end, his lips curving into a smirk against my jaw.

"_D-Damon_," I choked out his name in a moan and pleasure jolted through him, spiraling painfully around me. I dug my nails into his shoulder, but it only burned hotter and I couldn't remember what I had been about to say.

Feather light, Damon slowly brushed his lips across my jawline, and I whimpered and moaned, squirming pathetically under him as my mind swirled. I needed _more_. This wasn't _enough_! I could feel his smug amusement and I moaned with frustration. Why was he _doing _this? I wanted it rough and messy and frantic! _Fuck_!

"Damon," I begged helplessly, dragging my nails across his shoulder blades, arching into him. "_Please_!"

Gently, he continued kissing down my neck slowly, softly, a terrible smirk on his face that burned into my flesh. "Please?" He murmured innocently into my skin, his breath sweet and hot which sent a shiver through me. "Please, _what_, Clarissa?"

I moaned, my eyes fluttering shut. My name was intoxicating coming out of his mouth, his voice low and velvety, teasing.

"Please, _this_?" He rolled his hips and I gasped, his erection brushing against my panties and hitting something rather sensitive. Heat drenched my entire body, my cheeks stained with it, and my fingers ripped down the side of the leather couch as pleasure and an agonizing need flooded. He chuckled darkly, nipping my earlobe, throwing me into a hiss of pleasure. "Clarissa," he purred softly, his fangs dragging across my neck causing an excited hum to build in my stomach. "_Scream my name_."

He tore into my flesh almost brutally and his name ripped from my throat as I threw my head back, an assault of searing agony and blistering pleasure twisting into an blazing rapture. For a moment, nothing but the bright, burning, bliss existed.

Distance music shattered the utopia I had fallen into and irritation flew through me though it didn't belong to me. For a moment, I was confused, disoriented, unsure as to what was going on. I was stumbling out of the thick haze, the world around me so much darker, and I realized, suddenly, that I was hearing a cellphone go off. And that Damon was on top of me. _Oh_. And Damon was also _poking _me. With little Damon. Again. That's right, I just _threw _myself at him.

After he killed someone.

I wondered if I was allowed to talk about this in therapy.

Damon snorted, lifting his head to give me a confused, impatient, look. I felt his confusion, he wasn't sure why I was amused. But his confusion, his irritation and my amusement was chasing away the lust that had consumed me moments ago.

"When you drank from me, it wasn't like how it was when you do it before." I sounded dazed and stupid even to my own ears, but I was having a lot of trouble stringing thoughts together. A flare of smugness filled me. Jerk.

The ringing started again and Damon growled. "Fuck. It's Stefan." A twinge of nervousness flickered, pulling me back to reality just a little bit more. I know Damon was trying to appear less of a killing bastard so they'd get along.

That was working out well. Damon glowered at me. I blinked hazily as the ringtone came more into focus, but I wasn't sure if I was hearing it correctly.

"_I like your booty but I'm not gay! Not gay!_ _I like your booty but I'm not gay! Not gay!_"

Oh my God. I bit my lower lip to keep from grinning, but it was pointless, my amusement rolled straight into Damon and he actually glanced away from me. Oh my God, he was _embarrassed_! It was adorable!

"_Shut up_. This is fucking Jeremy's fault, he set that as Stefan's ringtone." Damon mumbled, shifting carefully as though worried moving a certain way would fling us back into that crazed fit of… whatever that was.

"Wait, wait, wait," I attempted to move my legs from around his waist so he could reach into his pocket without groping me. "Is that okay...?"

"No, hold on," Damon growled, propping himself up using the top of the couch. He attempted to lift himself off me when the couch flipped backwards with a loud _THAWK_.

Screeching in surprise, I threw myself around him tightly as we rolled off the fallen couch and across the wood floor. This was so freakin' cliché it should've been in a chick flick. I landed, sprawled out, on top of him. What even is my life anymore? Apparently, Damon was rather pleased by the way we landed, and he grinned crookedly at me.

"Get my phone, Clary," he commanded in a low, velvety, voice that sent a shiver through me. Feeling foolishly shy, I tugged my lip into my mouth, rolling it between my teeth, as I shifted, sliding my hand down his side.

I mean, I was just getting his phone.

Fucking damn it, Damon.

His smirk grew as I groped his pants in search for his screaming phone. "You _tease_," he growled playfully, dark blue eyes locked onto mine, as I slid my hand into his pocket. With warm cheeks, I brought the phone back to my ear.

"Mm, hello?" I hoped I sounded completely normal and not like I had been about to get freaky on a dead vampire's couch. Damon's warm fingers danced across my thigh, slowly inching upward, his blood sizzling in delight at the touch while a wave of mind numbing heat swept through me.

"_Clare_?" Stefan's voice sliced through, confusion in his voice.

"No, it's Damon," I murmured distractedly. "What's up?"

"_Well… Given the fact that you two are… You know, doing what you're doing_," Stefan said and I realized he must've still been in school. Damon's lips twitched into a smirk at his brother's choice of wording. _If only he knew_. "_I just wanted to know how things were going…_" Stefan sounded concerned and I adjusted Damon's phone so it was resting more comfortably on my shoulder.

_Oh_…

"Uh…" Perching myself up on Damon's chest, I tilted my head to look behind me where Slater lay. Right. Okay. "We _totally _didn't kill anyone and then have wild sex on their living floor a mere few feet away from their decaying corpse." Totally wasn't what almost happened. Nope.

Despite the amusement that rushed upward from my words, Damon rolled his eyes at me and snatched the phone from me. _Rude_. "Hello, baby bro!"

The lack of sleep had finally caught up with me. I had gotten everything I had wanted to know, and then some. So obviously ow I wanted to sleep. I could shift through the information later, examine it, re-examine it, research it, and probably regret Slater's death. But for right now... I wanted to sleep. And Damon was so warm… and so comfortable. I nestled into his chest, his fingers sinking in my hair soothingly as he spoke to Stefan, his voice now a lull.

"_Clarissa_."

I whined groggily, cracking an eye open. Damon was a mess of blurred colors and I blinked, opening the other eye. Sleepily, I glanced around, finding myself curled up in the passenger seat of Damon's car, my hoodie draped over me like a blanket.

"You brat, you fell asleep on me," Damon complained, and through the exhaustion that hung around me I could feel his fondness. He wasn't really annoyed. "I'm _bored_. Stay awake." There was also… worry?

"S'kay, do this often," I reassured him with a yawn. "Research complete. Now sleep."

"Why don't you care that I killed him?"

I guess we were going to have a serious conversation instead of sleeping. I stretched, sitting up a little bit more. Damon's blue eyes flickered toward me.

"Why don't you care that I don't care he's dead?" I asked back and he rolled his eyes. "See? How you feel? Is how I feel. You said it first anyway," I mumbled with another yawn. "We can be ourselves. Completely. That's why I jumped you. Murder isn't a turn on, just the whole realization that I'm totally and completely free when I'm with you."

Happiness smoothed down whatever else had brimming which flared into smug amusement. Goddamn it, Damon, just let me sleep.

"I win, by the way," he said in a cheerful singsong. "You completely lost control. Which means you'll be my kitty bitch again."

I was too sleepy to be upset and snuggled into the leather seat. "Damon?"

"Yes, my little Claryfairy?"

"We're fucked up."

He turned his head, blue eyes bright as he smirked playfully. "Yes." He agreed, gently taking my hand into his. I smiled sleepily, lacing our fingers. "But who cares? We're fucked up and happy."

Yeah.

We were.

* * *

TO BE HONEST, I'm really bummed that I killed Slater. Realistically, with the way Damon is, there was no way I could see keeping him alive without them kidnapping him and keeping him chained in a closet somewhere. I really liked him. Oh well.

Also, a formal apology to those following the tumblr. To be fair, the crack ship _Edmon _is all on Withery. I asked her to find me some gifs of Edward Cullen so I could do something stupid, and she made those for me. Karissa was a sort of drunken mistake that actually became a thing between my roommates and I because we're lame, and Katherine has literally become our freakin' mascot. We have so many problems. I received a few asks (which I answer privately) and I'd be more than happy to continue the Teen Wolf crossover. I'm also sorry about Darrus being a thing for anyone who plays Mass Effect. I promise I won't write anything and it'll just stay that one horrifying crack ship in the corner of the tumblr. AND THE WEIRD AUDIO POSTS. I'M SORRY OH MY GOD. I wish I could tell you from here on out it'll stay a TVD appreciation blog with random pictures of Clarissa/side stories, but I know I'm going to continue to post weird things in the middle of the night involving the TVD cast. And, oh my God, since I follow all you back, some of the things you reblog have me laughing so hard. I friggin' love you guys.

ON TO THE QUESTIONS!

**Q: Can you take over the writing staff for TVD? **  
If I could, I would employ all of you guys, we'd reboot the show (keep all the cast the same, of course) and it'd be magical.

**Q: Will Hayley still be in the picture? **  
Uh. Well. I'm gonna come clean, I haven't even finished season 3. I'm on the last two episodes and I can't bring myself to watch them because I know what happens to Alaric, and it's like, SO NOT READY TO FACE THAT HEART BREAK. I don't know if I'll be watching season 4, which means I have no idea if I'll be watching season 5. But I guess I kind of have to watch season 4 so I can get a better grip on Kol's character. UGH. SO that is entirely up to you guys! Do you want her in the story?

**Q: Will Tyler still become a werewolf? **  
Yus! Clarissa is going to ride him around the forest singing folk songs. KIDDING. No, but, yeah. He's gonna wolf out.

**Q: Stefan/OC?**  
GASP! I would probably start off writing and then it'd turn into this: AND THEN STEFAN RIPPED HIS CLOTHES OFF BECAUSE HOT DAMN SEXY ASS VAMAHJBV sdvs dfs and I'd snap my keyboard in half. I'm currently reading a fantastic Stefan/OC by Melissawtf called 'Lets Cheers to This'. But, ah... What kind of Stefan/OC would you guys be interested in? Something like this where girl falls into TVD? And would you want her to be Elena's twin? Someone else's sibling? Would you want her to wake up AS Elena? Would you like her to be a part of that world to begin with? Pre-Elena or post-Elena? What if she was a ghost nobody but Stefan could see? What kind of OC would you like?

**Q: Clarissa/Klaus dickery?**  
Yeees. Once Klaus gets over being a tool. But this is a happy fic, and he'll be happy too. I feel like Oprah. HAPPINESS FOR YOU, AND YOU. HAPPINESS FOR EVERYONE, LOOK UNDER YOUR SEATS! Even you, Klaus, you crazy murdering son of a bitch! IT'S RAINING SMILEY FACES!  
I also forsee him going to Clarissa with Caroline advice.  
"plz help her date me"  
"no"  
"i will kill everyone u luv"

**Q: Pokemon!Clarissa?**  
Oh my God, this has become a thing and I don't know how but I'm laughing so hard. I especially find it amusing that more than one of you keep bringing up the "I CHOOSE YOU" thing and Damon throwing a pokeball. I love it. Maybe we'll make it a mini-series on the tumblr, yeah?

**Q: Secret Circle fanfic?**  
By request, I have started watching the TV show with plans of buying the books! I just got the Mortal Instruments today, especially since it's being reblogged by you guys, I got curious as to what it is. But yeah, I'll check out the books/tv show and maybe it'll spark an idea for a fanfiction. :D

**Q: Will Scott/Therapy be shown in later chapters?/Clarissa should drag Stefan and Damon!**  
Yes! The Gilberts and therapy time are going to be a thing. Because that family needs it and they're far from being fixed. HA! Okay!

**Q: Bonnie/Kol?**  
Hmm. More reasons to watch season 4.

**Q: The Death of Bonnie's Gram?**  
No deaths! Especially not for Bonnie's family. That girl has been through way too much. And I do plan on making her a very badass witch.

**Q: The fairy idea is great but somehow ironic because Clarissa isn't even acting nice and fairies are honest creatures.**  
I hope you don't mind the direct quote but BAAAAAM! YOU ARE RIGHT ON! Fairies cannot lie! And while I'm making them on the mischievous side in this, it's still true. Cookies for you. Ooooh, Clarissa, what horrible monster are yooooou?

**Q: Mushy!Damon?**  
While a lot of you like the fluff, some of you have openly expressed your dislike for mushy Damon. Trust me, I like badass Damon too, and he's not going to roll over and be a ball of sunshine and flowers. He's always going to be Damon, and he's going to stay a bit more darker in this given the fact that he's going to be accepted as who he is rather than everyone bitch at him and want him to be "the good guy". But Damon IS a mushy kind of guy too. He's a complex creature. But I think I'll be able to balance the multiple sides of him out evenly to make everyone happy.

**Q: Pets.**  
No worries, Poe is going to make a come back and stay around. He's fun! You guys have given some awesome suggestions. A dangerous/less conventional/random/magical pet, monkey, chinchilla, puppy, cat ("since they seem to love the cat fantasy so much" HAHAHA!), a mean looking dog that bites Damon (HAH!), a bird ("I don't think she'll wanna keep it in a cage" SHE WOULDN'T), horse. I'll probably play around with ideas and do little shorts on the tumblr.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING!


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer:** No. But I had a dream that I got a parking ticket and Withery was like 'don't worry about it, I can get you out of this' and the next day she informed me she had her uncle buy the TVD and I was like 'Withery we literally know nothing about how to film/write a TV show'. It was horrible.

six hunDRED REVIEWS HOLY CRAP GUYS.  
GUYS  
I LITERALLY CANNOT HANDLE THIS, THANK YOU SO MUCH!

I love you guys so much, a MEGA HUGE THANK YOU THE BEST REVIEWERS IN THE WORLD: Szintia (i'm so sorry I couldn't get this out sooner, hope your grandma is feeling better!), Illias, Dark-Tiger, mkittycat1 (HA! Okay!), Guest, ClaryBerry5ever (! I LOVE YOUR NAME! :D), xXImperfectionXx7, padfootfaerie123, Gues, Sunblaze99 (hope you've been enjoying vacation!), SinfullySilent, Cara, Firestripe49, Chaos-and-Insanity, Lil Miss Sunshine14, unaccompaniedsoul, iheartanime07, justlikeglitter, Ansaraeh, orangezauber, Kittywithfangs, xXxElizabeth MikaelsonxXx, LisaF, Guest, JackieOh, Lucilla Tinwetari (it took me like two minutes to calm down from "I choo-choo-choose you."), AlexMelRose, Imprudence, Kitsunekit7, R, RosesMoon, antsnpants (I am so sorry to hear about the fees D: life seems to be getting way too expensive), KimmyWSmith, flazzy cullen, vikki .dillard, 1llu510n, Kenzie (that's the real Clarissa's favorite dog!), FalconHQ, tablekorner, Arabella, MissJess13, Randomreader1320, RealHuntress18 (GIVE ME YOUR TUMBLR I WANT TO SEE THIS SHIP), Britt, Sissymac, SavannaHerondaleLovesDauntless, nessafly, The Dark Lady55, melissawtf, SomebodyWhoCares, LoveLiveLife22

A big shoutout to **JackieOh**. Sending all the positive thoughts and love to you and your family! D:

* * *

"She still out?"

Damon's gaze flickered from the TV screen, where an ongoing game of Gears of War was happening, to Clarissa's still form on Jeremy's bed. A few hours previously, Damon had carelessly dropped her there and she hadn't moved since.

"Lemme check," Damon murmured distractedly, tugging on her foot. Clarissa didn't budge. She slept like the fucking dead, and if it wasn't for the fact that Damon could see her deep breathing and hear a steady heartbeat, he would have believed she died. "Yep."

Jeremy snorted, shaking his head, but didn't comment.

Damon had lounged around Jeremy's room (which was the one place he felt he could casually hang out in without it being _weird_) until the teen had gotten back from school. He had already filled Stefan in on everything they learned (Stefan could explain to Elena), and Damon had told Jeremy as they played video games. He was a little taken aback when Jeremy had correctly guessed they killed Slater. Whatever was wrong, mentally, with Clarissa was clearly affecting Jeremy because the kid accepted Damon's murderous tendencies with a nod.

"Kind of weird you guys didn't grill him more," Jeremy said after a moment. "Maybe you were Glamoured into not wanting to. I feel like C would have wanted to know everything there is about these Fae."

Damon rolled his eyes. He hadn't been _Glamoured_. "What else was there to talk about?"

"Gee, I don't know," Jeremy began sarcastically and Damon knew he wasn't going to appreciate the rest of the sentence. "Maybe, for instance, what makes the Fae so _dangerous_? Or, here's a great question, what else could potentially hurt or _kill_ Clare? Did you at least take the four-leaf clover off his body?"

Damon's flat stare answered Jeremy's questions. _Fuck_. He hadn't even thought of doing that.

…Maybe he _had _been Glamoured.

_Fuck fairies_.

It was nearing midnight when Damon decided to drop Clarissa into her own bed, he and Jeremy taking a quick break as the kid needed "the noms". No matter how loud Gears of War had gotten or the amount of swears the game had tugged out of both he and Jeremy, Clarissa had slept through it all. Almost as though the sound of screaming and gunfire were a soothing lullaby to her. Though, maybe the noise _was_ a comfort rather than a disturbance.

Damon hesitated, leaning over his sleeping (_sort of) _girlfriend, brushing the pad of his thumb across her soft warm cheek slowly, admiring her sleeping face. He had always found Clarissa to be exceedingly beautiful, though in the beginning he had chalked it up to her somehow being a descendant of Katherine's. Now Damon came to find that knowing Clarissa overwhelmed her own beauty into something indescribable.

Clarissa was like Katherine in the same way she wasn't. _Like _Katherine, Damon was left following after her, drawn by the gleam of mischief in her glowing eyes and a smile filled with secrets that promised _the world _of fun and _more_. Like Katherine, Clarissa had knocked him off his damn feet, leaving him sputtering and flabbergasted.

But unlike Katherine, she didn't skip off with a sweet, inviting, laugh, glancing coyly over her shoulder, expecting him to chase after her. No. Not Clarissa. She merely tilted her head, looked down at him, and offered her hand, sharing her deepest secrets with a smile. Well, in reality she had loudly sobbed it to him in a fit of hysterics. Regardless, Clarissa pulled him back onto his feet and half dragged him with her until he realized he wasn't being dragged at all.

It had been so sudden. One moment he was digging his heels into the ground, trying his hardest not to give in, and then suddenly, all at once, there was nothing _but _Clarissa. Suddenly, all at once, Damon found new purpose, a new direction. All at once, he wanted Stefan to be his brother again, wanted to forgive him, wanted to move past the anger and hurt. All at once, Damon was happy. Suddenly, not only did Damon have Clarissa, but he and Stefan could speak civilly. Suddenly, he was finding a friend in _Jeremy_. He _liked_ the kid, he had a sense of humor and Damon felt like he could actually _talk_ to him. Suddenly, he _wasn't _the big bad brother, the villain. He was just _Damon_. He was just a _dick_. He was just _accepted_.

When Katherine knocked him to the ground, it crumbled under him. Damon had found himself falling fast and hard with no direction or any idea of what he had been hurtling towards. He hadn't cared, either. Back then, he would have unthinkingly let the entire world and everyone he knew _burn_. Every fruitless attempt to get closer to Katherine left him moving further and further away from everything in his life and wider the gap between he and Stefan became. Katherine had been a freedom he wanted, she came in with her secretively amused smiles and playful eyes, beautiful in a way that couldn't be compared. But all the sweetness and adoring love he felt for her couldn't push back the growing bitter resentment he felt for his once best friend, his _brother_, who should have been there for _him_. Katherine told _Stefan _her secrets, too, and that had wounded Damon more than he could ever say. There was a darkness, a bitterness, a pain and a twisted jealousy that Damon believed accompanied being in love.

But Clarissa made him feel like the world was coming together at long last under his feet. He felt steady, sure of himself and sure of where he stood. He knew what he wanted. He knew where he wanted to _go_, and he knew what direction to take. He wasn't blindly free falling rapidly. Clarissa had awoken something inside Damon that he thought was long gone and he was going to sweep Clarissa off her feet. He wanted to do this right, he _had _to do this right. He wanted to take it as slowly as he could and simply delight in her company. He wanted to make it special with disgustingly fairytale Disney romance. He was going to take her on stupid dates and surprise her with flowers and take her dancing. And possibly blow something up with fireworks because vampire dickery and mischief was _their thing_. It was more than just making it special for _her_. He was going to be doing this for himself, too.

"Not Edward Cullen my _ass_."

Damon blinked, falling out of his thoughts, gazing down at a half awake Clarissa who was peering up at him sleepily, her voice groggy. _Damn it_. He had _not _wanted to be caught like this. She sat up, the blanket pooling around her waist, as she sleepily trailed her fingers over his chest. Happiness sighed through him, and he gently took her hand, intertwining their fingers.

"Go back to sleep, Clary," he murmured softly and she merely blinked, staring blearily. He wondered if she was even awake enough to realize they were having a conversation.

"Take your pants off."

He raised his eyebrows slowly. She looked ready to kneel over and fall back asleep, why the hell was she demanding that he'd take his _pants _off? "Are you trying to take advantage of me, Clarissa?" He flashed a flirty grin but the entire thing seemed to bounce right off his birdhouse. She blinked drowsily back at him.

"It's uncomfortable to sleep with pants on," she mumbled, pulling her bra out of her sleeve and carelessly tossing it off the side of the bed.

Damon had no idea how the hell she managed to do that, especially when she wasn't even really awake. Though he figured with the way she researched, she had become accustomed to thoughtlessly taking clothes off with skill. A moment later he registered what she'd said. He didn't know why he was surprised, she slept next to him after he willingly killed her, so of course she'd want him in bed with her. Especially since they were (mostly) dating now. _Still_, it made him happy.

"Too tired to put on night clothes," she announced groggily and there went her skirt, flying across the room. _Night clothes_.

Damon tried not to think about the fact that the girl he liked, who liked him back, was asking him to take his pants off and join her in bed. When she was wearing a shirt and a pair of panties he could _so easily _get rid of.

If he did as she requested, he wasn't really sure what would happen, because he wouldn't be able to keep his hands to himself. And he sort of promised Jeremy he'd come back and continue gaming.

But Clarissa was gazing up at him and he was crawling into the bed with her without another thought. She was seconds away from passing out anyway, and if she wanted to cuddle, who was he to refuse her that?

Damon was so very aware of every little moment she made, from the way her eyelashes fluttered sleepily, to her breathing. Not to fucking mention she was currently curled around him, her legs tangling between his, her chest pressed up against his side. Think _Disney_. Disney, Disney, Disney.

Clarissa tilted her head upward, planting a sweet kiss on his mouth. _Screw it_. Damon turned so he was facing her completely, wrapping his arms around her and leaning into her chaste kiss, deepening it. He kissed her slowly, simply relishing in the way she felt against him.

_Disney, Disney, Disney_.

But his fingers dipped under her shirt and he was skating his palm across her warm flesh and her arms were winding around his neck, pulling him further on top of her. Clarissa made a soft noise of pleasure as he nibbled lightly on her lower lip. She was kissing him back with more fever now, fingers sinking in his hair, and Damon easily settled comfortably on top of her. He was convinced he was made to match her. Where he ended, she began, seamlessly.

"Damon," her voice was breathy, his name rolling over him sweetly. Blue-gray eyes roamed his face with a mixture of sleepy lust and a gentle fondness that warmed him. Her fingertips ghosted over his cheek and he nuzzled into her hand. "You are my _everything_."

The pathetic amount of resolve he had to leave this bed vanished, his heart leaping pleasantly. He dipped his head, slowly moving his mouth across her face until his lips brushed against hers. He wanted to kiss her like this all night, slow and long, breathing her in.

* * *

It was a little after one in the afternoon when I awoke to a full bladder, something jabbing me in the ass, and a hand up my shirt groping my tit. It was safe to say this was definitely a first for me, and my reaction of shrieking and shoving a still sleeping Damon out of bed wasn't an _over_reaction. Not at all. My vampire groaned unhappily from the floor as I peered down at him, my face hot.

"What the shit, Clary," Damon groaned, voice rough and terribly attractive, sleepy blue eyes staring back up at me. "This better not be your idea of an alarm clock."

"You were touching me!" I defended myself in a sputter. I realized after it came blurting out how stupid that sounded. My cheeks grew hotter. "_Little Damon _was poking me!"

"Stop calling my dick _little Damon_!" Damon growled back at me. "You're the one who shoved your ass into my crotch! I think it'd be a bigger issue if that _didn't _make me hard!"

I didn't have time to discuss this, because the urgency to pee struck and I was stumbling out of the bed, racing into the bathroom. I damn near peed myself, too. That'd be something Damon would never let down. Ever. It'd be 'remember that one time you peed yourself?' for all eternity. At parties. Telling strangers. People's first impressions of me would forever be 'that one time Clarissa peed herself' because I had no doubt that it'd be the first fucking thing out of Damon's mouth.

In the back of my mind I wondered what it meant that I wasn't concerned with embarrassing myself (I wouldn't have been embarrassed) but annoyed that Damon would have had too much of a good time telling everyone and their mother about it. Christ. What even was my life anymore?

The door flew open and I slammed my knees together, shoving my shirt further down, as I gawked at Damon who lazily strolled in. I was on the toilet! Peeing! What was he _doing_? I opened and closed my mouth, staring at his overly attractive, smirking, face. His jet black hair was mussed in a sexy 'I just rolled out of bed but I'm hot as hell' look that made me want to run my fingers through it. His striking blue eyes were fixed on my face, and I realized he was only in a pair of boxers. Unable to help myself, my gaze slid down his bare chest, a little awestruck. Damon was so _beautiful_.

And he was _mine_.

The thought startled me.

Jesus Christ.

The Damon-obsessed hormonal demons that lived way, way, deep down inside me were awake. I snapped my eyes back to his smug little face. "Why are you in here?" I managed to shove out. "I'm peeing!"

"You don't seem to mind at all," Damon all but purred, his smirk growing, as he sauntered further into the bathroom. "And if you must know, I'm going to take a shower. Since _you_ kept me up all night because _you_ wanted to _make out_, I'm _waaaay _behind on everything I have to do today."

"But I'm peeing!" Why wasn't he getting that! This was a private thing!

Damon ignored me as he turned the shower on. He couldn't—_oh God_, he was taking his boxers off!

"Damon!" I slapped a hand over my eyes, my face hot. He merely laughed at me. Just _goddamn it_. "We're not even dating yet, and even if we were, you can't just be getting naked, it's way too soon for that stuff!" There were rules to be followed!

I'm pretty sure, anyway!

…Ignoring the fact that I had taken my shirt off in front of him, and that Damon would probably be happy just walking around naked 24/7 regardless of who was around.

I heard him step into the shower, the metal rings that held the shower curtain clanking against the metal rod. I dropped my hand from my face and released a puff of air, hoping to cool down my cheeks as I quickly finished my bathroom business. However, as I attempted to scurry from the bathroom, Damon's arm shot out, grabbing me by the waist and hauling me into the shower before I even realized what he was doing.

I was instantly drenched, the warm water caressing my skin, and I desperately tried not to think about the fact that Damon was completely naked. I knew I should've been flustered or annoyed, but between the soothing warm water and Damon's arms around me, I was finding it difficult to be anything but happy. His blue eyes glided across my face before he dipped his head, brushing his lips over mine briefly, slowly making his way across my face. My heart fluttered and I slid my hands over his wet chest, loving the way his skin felt against mine.

"We are so far _beyond_ intimate at this point, Clarissa." Damon murmured between soft kisses, his breath hot against my damp skin. Just like that, I was completely at his mercy. "We're _each other's_, fuck trivial statuses, they don't mean shit, and you've seen, felt, every inch of me in a way that nobody can or ever will. There isn't anything left between us that should stay hidden. And I'm not saying this shit because I want to trick you into anything… I can be naked and behave, we can keep it _Disney_."

Damon lifted his blue eyes to meet mine, their gentle intensity consuming and endlessly blue. I felt breathless, dizzy, and he grasped my face between his hands. I melted into his touch, waves of giddy pleasure rolling through me. Moving closer, I raised myself slightly on the tips of my toes, kissing just below his jaw. Damon's hands slid into my damp hair.

"Maybe I don't want it _Disney_," I continued moving my mouth down his neck, a spark of hunger growing as I ran my tongue across his damp skin. His skin was warm and smooth against my tongue and it had a certain _spice _to it, something unexplainable. But it made me want to do a lot more. I didn't think it was possible, but Damon _tasted _so good. "Maybe I just want _Damon_."

I was overcome with a wild desire to bite him. I wanted to mark his skin, I wanted him to feel the way I did when he bit _me_.

"_Clarissa_…" his fingers tightened, twisting in my wet hair. Everything rational flew out the window with the way he spoke my name. His voice was husky, sending waves of heat through me. "I want it Disney. Oh God, I want to make everything special for you. It's what you deserve and I want to give you _everything_." I didn't understand why he was so quick to offer the moon and stars when all I wanted was _him_. "It has to be special, everything with you has to be special."

God, I wanted to kiss and touch every inch of him. I wanted to do things I never thought I ever would. "Everything is already special," I mumbled distractedly, nuzzling happily into his neck, my palms raking down the front of his chest. I lightly scraped my nails across his wet skin as my hands slid downward. "It's special because it's with _you_."

I moved my mouth slowly across his collarbone, making my way back up his neck. Sliding my hands over his shoulders, I pulled him closer, lightly nipping his neck with my teeth. He made a soft noise, leaning closer to me and I, unable to help myself, bit harder.

Damon _moaned_.

Oh, _hell_.

The sound vibrated through me, and I suddenly felt much too hot. Damon's mouth was on mine, kissing me urgently, his hands _gripping _and _pulling_ and _touching_ me _everywhere_. I kissed him back deeply, my fingers sliding into his wet hair. Bottles of conditioner and shampoo were loudly falling as he pulled me upward, pressing me against the wall. I locked my ankles around his waist, an urgent, fiery, madness pulsing demandingly through me, making everything ache desperately for his touch. His tongue ran over my bottom lip and I parted my lips, pulling his tongue into my mouth eagerly, sliding my fingers further into his hair.

"_Clare_," Elena's voice cut through causing Damon and I to freeze.

_Oh my God_!

Elena!

Here I am, wearing clothes in a shower, wrapped around a totally naked guy, after he tells me he totally wants to keep it Disney, only to have my friggin' sister walk in!

_What the fuck_!

My life is a poorly written sitcom!

"Can you hurry up? We're leaving in forty minutes."

Damon's lips sprinted upward and I hastily slapped a hand over his mouth, feeling slightly panicked. "Uh, yeah, okay, sure," I said hurriedly, not liking the mischievous glint in Damon's blue eyes.

"…are you okay?"

Goddamn it, Elena! "Yes! I'm totally fine, see you in a—_mmm_!" Damon sank his fangs into my hand, instantly throwing me into a haze as heated pleasure draped across me. My cheeks warmed as I failed terribly at disguising the moan. Crap! Friggin' crap! Damon's glowing blue eyes gleamed wickedly back at me as he smirked against my skin.

The shower curtain suddenly ripped open, tearing my attention toward an angry looking Elena. Oh my God, why was this happening!

"That is my _sister_!" Elena snapped angrily, looking outraged. She pointed threateningly at us. "She's stupid and innocent! Stop doing this kind of stuff when she hasn't even agreed to be your girlfriend yet, Damon! If you like it, PUT A FUCKING RING ON IT! YOU'RE NOT SEDUCING HER!"

My mouth fell open as I stared at Elena. "You just swore!" It was the only thing that really registered, and I flat out gawked at her.

"I already put a ring on it." Damon declared dismissively and Elena ripped the necklace from her neck, throwing it at him. Damon hissed and shoved me at my twin, causing the two of us to slam into the tiled floor painfully. I moaned, rolling as Elena shoved me off of her, stumbling as she got up. What the shit? "Don't throw vervain at me while I'm naked!" As if Elena and I had done him a great injustice, Damon angrily closed the shower curtain. "Get out, I'm showering, you perverts! First Clarissa jumps at me, and then little Miss Judgy decides to try to peep at me! I hope Stefan knows this horrible habit you have, Elena!"

"Lies!" I whined from the floor. "Help me, Laney, the big bad vampire is seducing me!"

Elena glowered furiously at the shower curtain. "You're an ass," she announced as I used the sink to help myself up. Thanks for the hand, Elena, you're a real friggin' pal. "I'm taking the towels, you can air dry!"

Damon poked his head out from behind the shower curtain, a flirty smirk on his face. "I know you're _dying _to see me naked again, but I belong to _Clarissa_."

Elena raised her eyebrows in the sort of way that I knew whatever was about to come out of her mouth would be pure sass. I snatched a towel from her, edging toward the door. I didn't want to get involved with a potential sass war.

"Right. I'm _dying _to see _Little Damon _when I have _Impressively Hung Stefan_."

My fingers slipped on the door knob and I nearly fell face first into the door.

Oh.

My.

God.

Things I never wanted to know! Ever!

Damon's look of complete shock was priceless and I almost wished I had a camera.

"How—you _told _her?" Damon squinted his blue eyes at me and I threw my hands up.

"I've been with _you_ since yesterday! And then I was asleep!" Seriously!

"I'm pretty sure the whole house heard you shout 'stop calling my dick Little Damon'." Elena continued staring at Damon with her sassy raised eyebrows and Damon gawked back at her in horror.

I was just completely, eight hundred percent, done with life. I wasn't sure if I was about to laugh (if I did, I had no doubt something horrible, like my neck being snapped, would happen) or if I just couldn't handle the sheer doneness of today. I quickly exited the bathroom just as Damon exploded with: "_I'M A MURDEROUS VAMPIRE, DAMN IT!_"

The door flew open and I bounced backwards with a surprised shriek, only to quickly avert my eyes from a very annoyed, and so very nude, Damon standing in my bedroom. Getting water everywhere! And being naked! I mean, I know he just gave me a romantic talk about how we can prance around naked because we feel each other deeply like nobody else and shit, but I just… I wasn't _ready _for that step! I mean, friggin' penis!

"Look at it." He demanded.

Oh my God!

"No!" Why was this happening today, of all days? Why couldn't this wait! I needed time to process everything I researched, I needed a few days of vegging out and not thinking! "Damon!"

"Look at it and then tell your damn sister I'm not _little_!"

Why was that _so _important to him! I'm not going to look at his dick just because he wanted _Elena_ to know it wasn't _little_! He was getting way too worked up over this!

"Knowing you inside and out doesn't mean I'm ready to look at your ding ding dong! Your tra la la!" I cried back and he growled lowly.

"Oh my God, Clary, it's just a _penis_! Of all the women I have to be into, it has to be the one who has the mentality of a _five_ year old!" His irritated frustration was a like a smack, stunning me.

What the _actual _fuck?

Anger flooded and quickly pulsed into fury.

Real. Freakin. Nice. I wasn't acting like a _child_, I was fairly sure my response was fucking acceptable! Excuse me if I didn't want to see a dick being whipped around like it wasn't any big deal! This was far from what I was used to!

I dropped my hands from my face, turning around to stare at a soaking wet Damon coolly. He squinted his eyes back at me and I let my gaze drop. I've seen penises before. Like, when scrolling through my dash on Tumblr and then BAM, penises in my face. Penises flapping in the wind. Penises a galore! I wasn't the type of virgin who screamed, flung their keyboard, and hid under the couch for a few days. I was just _disinterested_. So seeing Damon's wasn't anything shocking.

"Your _Vagina Destroyer_ can bench press galaxies, Damon, it's seriously impressive and I'll be sure to let Elena know. Or, you could just skip over to her, and show her yourself, since her opinion on _your dick _means so much to you." I was feeling strangely calm in my rage. And he _rolled _his eyes. That _little_ bastard. "I know you're getting mixed signals because I tend to _throw myself _at you, but half the time you're _provoking_ the reaction. Then you step back and spew some bullshit about making it _special_ and _Disney_ as you make out with me completely naked. So excuse me if I bounce between being on an acceptable _fuckable_ level for you, to awkward and unsure and _childish_. I'm seriously fucking new to this whole attraction thing, so don't you _dare_ make me feel like shit about myself when I'm unwilling or not yet comfortable with something! Have some fucking patience, or get over your fucking crush and find someone who isn't a childish virgin!"

I wasn't in the mood to deal with anything, and I especially wasn't going to get into a fight over this shit. I didn't want to see Damon's face, because I knew he could easily pull me out of this mood. And I just wanted to be left alone, because _fuck that_. I had every right to be pissed off. I marched out into the hall, leaving the bedroom door wide open so Damon could give everyone a nice view of his junk.

"Don't fucking talk to me," I exploded upon seeing Elena who was exiting her room. She jumped as I stormed past her. "I'm borrowing your clothes."

Elena had a crappy selection but I managed to find a pink shirt with two chibi pandas on it, one smacking the other. Good. Fuck Damon. I'd smack him in the dick with a stake. At this point there was literally nothing to be done with this hair. I'd come to find that this Clarissa's hair needed at least fifteen minutes of time dedicated to it right after getting out of a shower. I'd probably just put it up in a ponytail later.

Luckily, the sky opened up and God himself came shimmering down wearing a thong, aggressively pelvic thrusting to some techno beat, as he hand delivered the ebay package I had been rotting away for. I suddenly knew what my weekend was going to consist of: _Angel_. I was going to plant my ass down on the couch and refuse to move. I was going to surround myself with endless mountains of sugar and force Stefan into watching it with me because he _was _Angel, damn it.

I was going to inhale unhealthily large amounts of junk food while sobbing violently over fictional characters and using Stefan as a living tissue.

It was my destiny.

There would be zero thinking involved this weekend. I wasn't going to think about all the new questions that were going to arise, and I certainly wasn't going to think about being any kind of supernatural freak. No. It would be just Angel.

"You haven't been listening to a word I have been saying." Jenna's accusing voice cut in as she ripped the glorious DVD boxset from my hands. Stuffing back an angry sigh, I raised my eyebrows at her. She lifted hers back in a _do not challenge me _kind of way.

Jenna + 1, Clarissa 0.

Damn it.

"We're leaving in fifteen minutes."

No we weren't. I was staying here. With Angel. Forever.

"Jeremy!" Jenna called from the bottom of the steps, moving past me, taking my precious DVD boxset with her. "Get your butt down here!"

Annoyed, I moved toward the kitchen, hardly surprised when Poe flew from the open living room window and landed by my feet, hopping with me. To be honest, it made me ridiculously happy. I loved Poe. It didn't matter if Damon was controlling him. My affection was directed at the bird, not the vampire.

I found, surprise surprise, Stefan and Elena in the kitchen. I guess this was my life now. Surrounded by vampires. Cooking vampires, apparently.

Stefan, wearing a ridiculous looking pink apron, tilted his green eyes toward me and offered a friendly smile as I threw myself down on the stool. Poe flapped up, hopping about the island, eyeing the bowl of what looked like… I wasn't even sure what the hell this was.

"Lentil stew and sausage." Stefan was just a friggin' mind reader now, wasn't he? "Just wake up?"

What made him think _that_? Maybe I had been just hanging out in my room in dead silence all day! It was obvious that he was well aware of my mood and I threw a look in Elena's direction, but she was busy washing dishes. Though, Stefan might've just overheard me explode on Damon. Moodily, I stroked Poe's feathers. I wanted a pet. Like a cuddly pet. I loved Poe, but I couldn't exactly cling to him.

"Your hair is sticking up." Stefan continued and I stared at him flatly. Was that supposed to be funny? "You look like a bird." He placed a hand on top of his head, spreading his fingers out, like he was a freakin' peacock.

Poe gave an angry squawk and Elena jumped, spinning around as Stefan frowned, staring back at the crow. Elena's eyes flickered from Poe to me, doing a double take. Oh boy. Clarissa has wild hair! Big whoop dee doo! Better call the friggin' hair police!

"I'll get you a brush," Elena announced because I really gave two shits about how I looked.

"You know what might make you feel…" Stefan paused and shot me a stupid ass smirk, raising his eyebrows. "Less moody?" Really, Stefan? Really? You're going to choose to show your snarky side when I'm considering staking you and your friggin' brother? "Some food." He nudged the bowl closer to me and I stared at him skeptically. "Just _try _it."

Sighing, I plucked up the spoon and decided to humor him. Because if I didn't like it, I could make a show of spitting it out on the floor. Surprise twinkled through me when I realized it wasn't bad at all. Actually, it was pretty _good_. Jesus. Who would've thought? I took another spoonful and held it out for Poe, loudly ignoring the look Stefan sent.

"Did you want to be a cook when you were all grown up, Steffy?" I teased with a faint grin. Stefan's smile tilted toward embarrassed and he laughed, leaning against the island across from me, perched on his elbows.

"Doctor, actually."

That was so cliché it was just disgusting. Of course he wanted to be a doctor. He was a vampire with a blood issue. It was the basic requirement for angst-ridden vampires. I was about to tell him about this one erotica I had read about with a doctor and a vampire, when Damon strutted into the kitchen, just in a towel.

Looking so freakin' attractive it was almost painful.

I wanted to run my fingers through his messy dark hair. Actually, I wanted to run my fingers across his chest. He was just so… so _beautiful_. I nearly forgot I was angry with him until I realized I was openly gawking at him and he was _smirking _back at me. I _sucked_.

"Clarissa," he greeted casually, my name slithering across my skin in a soft, intoxicating, purr.

It tugged at me, promising the entire world, if only I just let go of my anger. But Damon always had a horrifying amount of control over me just by saying my name. And that wasn't fair.

I turned to look at Stefan with a sweet smile, the younger Salvatore glancing between us. "Stefan, did you know your brother's penis is called _The Vagina Destroyer_ because it's so massive and terrifying? Truly majestic."

At that very moment the doorbell rang.

What perfect timing.

I hopped off the stool, refusing to look at either vampire, Poe at my heels, as I made my way to the door.

Mr. Scumbag Reporter stood on the other side, causing anger to churn hotly in my stomach. I didn't want to deal with his blindingly white smiles and gross ass charm.

"Clare," he said happily, like the feeling was mutual. "You look—"

"Eat dick." I slammed the door in his face furiously. God I hated that asshole.

I turned around, nearly colliding into Damon's still damp chest. My heart bounced with a thrill of excitement despite myself and he squinted his blue eyes back at me, curiously. "On a scale from _You're An Asshole _to _Eat Dick_, how pissed off are you at me?"

He wasn't funny!

And by that I mean he totally freakin' was. Goddamn it. It was impossible to stay infuriated with him when he was looking at me with those blue eyes. And I _knew _he was trying to ease me out of the anger, it was in his voice and the way he was trying to get me to laugh.

"I'm staying mad at you," I threatened, stabbing him in the chest with a finger. "But you'll never reach _Eat Dick_."

He nodded thoughtfully as Scumbag Reporter knocked on the door, laughing awkwardly and calling my name. I growled and Damon's grin was suddenly feral. He sauntered past me, opening the door. I watched, with growing curiosity, as he leaned against the doorframe casually.

Still just wearing a towel.

Like he owned the place.

God he was too attractive.

"Yeeeees?" Damon drawled in a bored tone.

Logan's smile slid right off his stupid face. "Who are you?"

"Who are _you_?" Damon echoed, picking at his nail idly.

"Logan Fell," Scumbag said with a charming smile, offering a hand, but Damon merely stared him down. Logan waited a beat before lowering his hand. _Ha_. "Right. I'm here to pick up Jenna and the kids. We've got _plans_." And the _kids_. Nice.

"She's a little busy right now." Damon shrugged a shoulder indifferently and stepped back, slamming the door in his face.

I couldn't fight the grin that flew upward. I tried, I _really _tried, but happiness danced through me. Damon didn't care _why _I didn't like someone, for him, I didn't have to have a _reason_, he immediately took my side. No questions asked. But more than that, he was dick enough to go a step further than dislike someone with me. He actually expressed it. To their face. Damon winked playfully and I knew there was no way I could stay angry at him when he made me so damn happy.

"_You_!" Jenna stomped between us, looking Damon up and down angrily. He frowned back at her, looking down at himself questioningly. "What are you doing without any clothes on!"

"What is it with everyone trying to make me feel ashamed about my body?" Damon whined, pretending to pout, as Stefan met Elena at the steps. I eyed the brush in her hand unhappily.

"There's a Logan Fell at the door for you," Stefan let Jenna know with a smile. What a friggin' rat bastard!

"Way to take the side of a cheating bastard, Steffy," I snapped angrily and he raised his eyebrows at me.

"Clare, be nice," Jenna groaned, looking like she was about to have a headache. I noticed she was wearing lipstick and she changed her outfit from before. Ugh. Why? For _him_? She brushed past us, moving toward the door, just as Jeremy came down the steps.

"People can change." Stefan murmured and I scoffed. He was apply himself to a situation that just didn't work.

"Oh hey, _Little Damon_, way to bail on me last night to do gross shit." Jeremy greeted sarcastically and Damon growled.

Jesus Christ.

"You're leaving me here alone with all your game systems." Damon threatened back as Jeremy passed us, ruffling my already destroyed hair. I swatted at him but Jeremy twirled out of my reach, laughing, as he followed Jenna out of the house. "Look what you've done." Damon's tone was annoyed, but his gaze was playful.

I thought about patting him on the chest, but decided against it as that would only distract me. "Damon," I sighed his name. "You are, without a doubt, the biggest dick I have _ever _met. So it's a compliment."

Damon leaned closer to me, his warmth and a mixture of my apple shampoo and his natural Damon-y musk dulling my senses. "I'm your _favorite _dick. You _can't get enough_ of my _dick_ery." His voice dipped into a low, flirty, one, and I found myself tilting closer to him, caught up in the way his blue eyes devoured me.

"_OKAY_," Elena grabbed my arm roughly, pulling me toward the door. The spell Damon had put over me was broken. I was free! "I don't want to ever witness your twisted flirting ever again!"

Damon merely grinned, wiggling his fingers at us, as Elena _literally _dragged me out of the house, Poe just managing to fly after us before she slammed the door shut. I stumbled a bit down the steps, feeling a little confused.

So we were going somewhere with _Logan_?

But we were leaving the Salvatore brothers, alone, at the house?

Who needed guard dogs when there's vampires? The answer was: me. Now I wanted one. Oh my God. I wanted one really bad. I wanted a big mean looking thing, like a military trained attack dog from Russia.

"Um…" Logan's gaze was fixed on Poe who had flapped angrily with a shriek. "Jenna," he moved in front of her, as though to protect her from a crow. She raised her eyebrows. "Call animal control, I think… I think it's rabid. Clare, sweetheart, come here, slowly move away from the bird…"

What a toolbag. As though to spite Logan, Poe hopped closer to me and I shot the concerned sleazeball a grin. I'm the friggin' crow whisperer.

"Whoa, Logan, dude, take a chill pill." Jeremy rolled his eyes, opening the door to Logan's unimpressive Hummer. "It's just Poe." I was glad that at least _Jeremy _was taking my side in loudly disliking Logan.

"Poe?" Logan furrowed his eyebrows as Jenna patted his shoulder.

"Yep. No need for the mancho act, bucko." Jenna sent a small little grin in my direction, which I was kind of surprised about. I guess someone explained to her the necessity of Poe and Damon's crazy vampire tendencies. "He's pretty harmless. But thanks. If a pigeon is nearby, I'll remember to call you."

_Bam_. Jenna might've put on lipstick and dressed up for this dick, but she still kept her sass!

"Don't worry, Logan, I freaked out when I first saw him, too." Elena smiled at the dick kindly, climbing into the Hummer after Jeremy. Stop making him feel wanted, Elena! Jeez.

"He's coming with us." There was no room for argument, and Poe took the initiative by flapping up into the vehicle, squawking loudly, causing Logan to grimace. I stared back at him, challengingly.

"You have a very unique taste in pets, Clare," Logan smiled warmly at me, trying to ease through his obvious uncomfortable disdain for Poe. "But it suits your personality."

If Logan was a real man, he would've called me a bitch instead of trying to butter me up. Loser. He couldn't even stand up for himself and say _no_. He was really friggin' intent on getting into Jenna's pants, even if it meant putting up with my bullshit. Ha.

I swatted at his attempt at trying to help me into the Hummer and rolled over Elena and Jeremy, both who shoved me to the floor of the car. Such loving siblings.

"Where are we even going?" I asked as I sat between the two of them, Elena taking it upon herself to try to brush my hair. She should've known it was way too late. The mess was unfixable.

"I told you three times already," Jenna sighed as Logan helped her into the Hummer, closing the door for her. Like a twat.

"We're helping the new history teacher move into his apartment," Jeremy said with a _meaningful _look. The brush snapped off the handle and hung awkwardly in a clomp of tangled hair. Elena groaned in defeat.

"We're helping Alaric move?" I grinned at Jenna who was suddenly so very interested in the radio. I hoped _Alaric_ was the reason Jenna was wearing lipstick. Logan clearly noticed the exchange and I smiled at him pointedly. "Ricky will be happy to see you again, Jenna."

"It's for extra credit," Jenna said, turning around to give me a _look_.

"Hey if that's what you call it these days," I shrugged my shoulders causing her to flush.

"Ew, Clare, I don't want to hear about our Aunt and history teacher's weird roleplay!" Jeremy said, going along with it, and Logan nearly dropped the keys instead of putting them in the ignition.

"Yeah, Jenna!" I pretended to be grossed out. "I don't wanna know about you doing things for _extra credit_!"

"You guys are hilarious," Jenna rolled her eyes and turned back around.

"Ignore them, Logan, they're immature." Elena said loudly as Poe hopped up into my lap. Aw.

"It's alright, Elena," Logan said, turning his gaze toward Jenna, smiling at her. "I think I can handle the heat, I'm prepared to climb mountains if it means I get to spend time with your Aunt." Jenna's expression softened a little as she smiled back at him. Ew.

"Are you saying Clare is a mountain?" Jeremy asked and I gasped.

"You're calling me _fat_!" I whined loudly.

"No I'm not," Logan assured me warmly. "You're stunning."

"So you're saying I wouldn't be beautiful if I was overweight?" Didn't Logan realize he couldn't win? Every time he opened his mouth, he was just losing more and more.

To my ever growing frustration, he released a very convincing laugh. "You know, Jenna, Clare is the most like you. I think it might be a family trait."

Jeremy and Elena shifted awkwardly and I suddenly remembered that Jenna wasn't in the loop about the whole adoption thing. I mean, it was possible she _knew _and didn't know how to tell us… But still.

I made a mental note to spring it on her at the most inappropriate time possible.

My phone buzzed and I pulled it out, glancing at Elena curiously as I saw it was a text from her.

Elena: _stop being assholes. Ok yes what he did was WRONG but that was years ago and he's making an effort to b a better guy & deserves another chance. U cant expect me to b OK with Damon who KILLS INNOCENT PPL and then u 2 turn around & hate on logan 4 cheating._

Apparently she sent it to both me and Jeremy. I guess having group conversations via text message was already a thing. Well, you know what they say about two people thinking alike… There can only be one, and I must kill Elena and take my rightful place as Great Mind.

I texted to the both of them: _I'm not going to just say LOL K and accept him when I don't see any evidence of him being a changed man. All he's doing is being charming. He knows how to get into Jenna's head because of their history. Changed or not, I'm not gonna make it easy for him. Gotta prove himself._

Elena raised her eyebrows at me as my phone buzzed with Jeremy's reply.

Jeremy: _he is 1 of the founding family which menas hes part of the vamp hatin council dedicated 2 findin n killin ur boyfriends so. been readin the old gilbert journ. n you kno that pocket watch that was passd down to me? bac in 1864 they used it to track down vamps. Logan comes ovr for diner, saw him exiting my room, n the watch is missin. Vamp attacks start up, the council is obv still running, we dont give the wtch to mrs lockwood n suddenly logan is interested in jenna again?_

Um.

_What_?

Logan was dead.

So dead.

So fucking dead.

_Nobody _uses Jenna like that. I knew for a fact that Logan still had feelings for her, but that didn't mean _shit _if he was going to use her and lie to her face! _And _now the vampire hating shitbags had a magical watch? Yeah. No. I was so tempted to climb over to the front and beat the living crap out of that smug little dick.

Annoyed, I sent both Stefan and Damon a text explaining everything Jeremy had just told me.

Elena: _OK lets not make assumptions and do NOT tell Jenna unless we know for a fact! Lookin at u, Clare_

I threw her a look.

Me: _Assumptions? Dude, he's using Jenna! He STOLE a watch from Jeremy! I'm gonna kick his ass!_

Damon: _he's dead_.

My lips twitched. Ah, plotting murder. My new normal.

Stefan: _are you POSTIVE he stole the watch?_

I forwarded the two texts to Elena and Jeremy.

Jeremy: _watch there when i left my room, watch gone when i went to bed after logan left. unles one of clares fairy friends took it_.

Har. Har. Freakin' hilarious Jeremy! He shot me a teasing grin.

Damon: _possible. Clary was pissed at me this morning and my clothes disappeared._

Friggin' hilarious. The both of them.

Elena: _can we not plan on killing someone please_

It's not like we woke up this morning and thought 'who should die next'! But it's kind of necessary when they have a magical friggin' watch!

Stefan: _agreed. We'll just steal the watch back_.

Of course Stefan agrees with Elena.

Me: _Before or after the watch leads them back to you?_

Jeremy: _could be to late_

Damon: _achievement unlocked 250G: slaughtered entire vampire hating council_

Jeremy erupted into sudden, loud, laughter, causing Elena and I to jumped.

Between Stefan and Elena, Damon agreed to not go on a killing spree and both were pretty firm with Jeremy and I to help Damon keep his murderous tendencies in check. I was ninety percent sure even if Jeremy and I were dead against Damon ever killing again, it would mean almost nothing to him. Besides, Stefan should've realized he was the one who held all the power at the moment.

Dumbo.

Logan's Hummer pulled up to a nice looking apartment complex and I was pretty excited to get the hell out. I eyed the large moving van curiously, suddenly wondering if there was enough of us. Alaric didn't realize how lucky he was, if it was anyone else, I would have flat out refused.

The thought struck me as odd. I hardly _knew _Alaric, why was I so happy to help him? As he approached, I quickly glanced down at my ring. Yellow and white danced back at me. So he wasn't supernatural. But that didn't mean I should be so _quick _to trust him like I was. I didn't know anything about him other than he was with Isobel. And right now, trust was something that had to be _earned_. Especially with vampires like Elijah lurking and the whole doppelgänger thing.

"Hey," Alaric greeted with a warm smile, eyes light in the sun, a look of gratitude on his face. "Thanks for helping out, guys, it really means a lot."

And there went all my resolve to stay suspicious and wary. I beamed back at him brightly.

"Of course," Logan said just as warmly, stepping forward with his hand out. God that guy and his demanding handshakes. "Welcome to Mystic Falls. I'm Logan Fell," bitchtit introduced with a charming smile. "I'm Jenna's…" he glanced over to our aunt who stared back at him. With a charismatic laugh, Logan turned his winning smile back to Alaric. "Potential boyfriend, if I'm lucky."

Alaric's gaze flickered toward me and I mouthed '_scumbag_' back. What was that crap, needing to stake his claim on Jenna? Good. I hope Logan felt threatened.

"Alaric Saltzman," Alaric took Logan's hand with a grin. "Rissa's told me some things about you."

Ho _oh_! What was _this_? Alaric was officially the coolest. Not only did he establish that he was on much better terms with me (hence nickname), and so having a better chance with Jenna, but that he _knew _what a dick Logan was! Good! Surprise flashed across Logan's face as Elena and Jeremy sent me various looks that shifted between curiosity and exasperation.

Jenna just didn't seem to be able to keep her eyes off Alaric.

Logan recovered quickly and chuckled, glancing at me with a faux fond look. I wondered if I could have Poe peck his eyes out. "I'm sure they were nothing but terrible things."

"I'd have nicer things to say if you weren't a vagina wig," I smiled back at Logan sweetly and his grin faltered. Elena groaned as Jeremy flashed me a thumbs up. I was thrilled when the corners of Jenna's lips twitched upward.

"Okaaaay," Jenna clapped her hands together and smiled widely at Alaric. "You've already met Clare, and such a wonder she _is_. This is Elena," Jenna gestured to my twin. "The well behaved twin." Elena smiled and waved. "And this is their younger brother, Jeremy. He's a trouble maker too."

"Heh, I was a bit of a trouble maker as well," Alaric grinned at Jeremy in amusement. "I'd say to stay out of trouble, but given that you're helping me move, I think it'd be fair to say I'll give a blind eye to any delinquent activity."

"Sweet." Jeremy nodded happily. "Can't wait to deface school property."

Jenna swatted Alaric's arm and he merely shrugged his shoulders, grinning an adorable boyish smile at her. I gleefully watched Logan watch the exchange. He looked ready to say something when a familiar car pulled up next to the Hummer.

"Oh! Yeah, I called your friends," Jenna said, as though she had forgotten, and I bounced on my heels as Caroline and Bonnie stepped out of Bonnie's car. "Figured the extra help couldn't hurt. I hope you don't mind, Ric."

"Hey!" I gushed excitedly, prancing over to my blonde bestie. Caroline grinned back at me, giving me a one armed hug. "You guys are going to help the new teacher move?"

"It's all about making good impressions," Caroline said chirpily, smiling widely, as Elena joined us. "Help out the poor new teacher for extra credit and become instantly on his good side for the rest of the school year! Plus, it's a part of one of the committees I run. It'd be, like, a sin to _not_ show up!"

Bonnie snorted. "Even if it wasn't for extra credit, or whatever, I'd come anyway. It's for Jenna."

"Jenna's doing it for _Alaric_," I sang, causing Caroline and Bonnie to tilt their eyes toward the history teacher.

"Well… He _is _kind of hot." Bonnie agreed and I glanced behind us, to where Logan was awkwardly standing next to a laughing Jenna and a grinning Alaric.

"Don't get caught up in this," Elena sighed, sending me a look. "_Clare _is trying to hook them up, but Jenna is in the process of getting back together with Logan."

"Yeah, the dick who cheated on her." Jeremy said, coming to stand between Elena and I. He nodded at Bonnie and Caroline in greeting.

"You guys don't really know anything else about him?" Bonnie asked, curiously, as Caroline glanced at me with a tiny mischievous smile. "He could be an axe murderer. You should get the info on him before you try to set him up with Jenna. She's had enough bull."

"She should dabble between the both of them," Caroline said passionately with a filthy smile. "Before choosing. They're both hot and they're both obviously going to fight over her. Look at that stare down."

I turned, looking over at Alaric and Logan. Alaric was gesturing to something inside the moving van. It was hardly a stare down.

"Rivals." Bonnie nodded with mock seriousness.

"Oh my God," Elena snorted, shaking her head. "Can we not? Let's just help him move, not start a love triangle."

"Ew, I'm not _actually _going to lift heavy furniture," Caroline wrinkled her nose, peering over our shoulders. "What gives? Didn't the hottie brothers come with you? _Sheesh_, us girls can't be expected to do all the heavy lifting!"

Elena gave her a flat stare as Jeremy threw an annoyed one. But I couldn't help but agree with her. Plus I was lazy.

"I'm not a girl." Jeremy muttered but Caroline acted like she didn't hear him as she pulled out her phone. "And Logan is here. So between me, him and Alaric…"

"Logan is a sissy." I dismissed.

"I think between the four of us, we'll be okay." Bonnie frowned at Caroline and I. "We're strong."

"_They're _lazy. It's more like you and I." Elena pointed out and Jeremy huffed.

"Forget it," he grumbled, stalking off to where Logan and Alaric were.

"I'm not lazy." I frowned, even though I totally was. "I'm just weak and frail."

"James said he and some friends can be over in like five minutes." Caroline said brightly and my mood darkened. I thought I'd be spending time with _her_.

"You mean, so you two can sneak off and make out the entire time." Bonnie voiced what we were all thinking. I raised my hand and she high fived me.

"You guys need to give him a chance." Caroline said with a frown, raising her eyebrows with some sass.

"And we will, once he hangs around long enough to say hello and not stick his tongue down your throat." Elena raised her eyebrows back. I was glad we were all mutually against James.

"Yeah, the moment he comes around, you drop off the face of the Earth." I whined.

"Don't be jelly, Clare. You know I love you most."

Love me the most, my friggin' ass. The moment James' shiny car pulled up, we were forgotten instantly. Abandoned. I was pretty sure I could literally be on fire, and Caroline wouldn't notice. I was a little surprised to see Matt and Tyler exiting the car, and wondered if James had invited them along because he knew we were all mutual friends.

Jeremy and Tyler did an awkward nod at each other in greeting, and I wondered what that meant in bro language.

Unable to watch James and Caroline devouring each other's faces like some kind of gross creatures, I tilted my gaze down to my ring. I was hardly surprised to see the gray gleaming back at me. This totally confirmed it. James was _so _not human.

"Weird mood ring," Tyler muttered next to me and I jumped. He raised his eyebrows, like I had done something weird. "So. Uh… Is Vicki dating your brother…?"

He stared at me, awkwardly. "No." I didn't think so, anyway. "I'm pretty sure they're… You know. Not. But… you should ask him, instead. Cause I really don't know."

God, I've been so wrapped up in Elena and fairies and psycho vampires and research that I hadn't even gotten a chance to talk to Jeremy about normal things. I felt bad. Hell, we didn't even get to talk about the whole adoption thing and how he was feeling about us not actually being related. I glanced past Tyler, to Matt, Jeremy and Logan trying to fit a couch through the doors. I'd have to find the time today to talk to him about whatever he needed to talk about.

* * *

"So, uh…" Alaric was staring down at Poe with a frown. This wasn't a big deal.

"Don't question the freaky crow," Bonnie said, resting an elbow on my shoulder. I stared back at her, offended on Poe's behalf. "He's Clare's pet. I think. He just sort of lingers. You'll get used to him after a while."

"He's not coming inside." Alaric told me flatly. "I'm already allowing a bunch of weird teenagers into my new apartment, touching my belongings, I'm _not _going to have a bird inside as well."

Logan drifted over to us, clapping Alaric on the shoulder and blinding us with that God awful smile. "Alaric, Alaric, Alaric. Trust me. You're better off doing as the little lady wants." Ew, Logan. Get out of my face.

Alaric snorted, folding his arms. "No."

Jenna, who was walking by with a box, grinned at him. "See, Logan? That's what it looks like to have balls." Oh, BAM!

"_Burn_!" Jeremy called from a few feet away.

"Ouch," Logan smiled after Jenna, placing a hand over his chest. "I can't catch any breaks today." Logan couldn't catch any breaks ever.

My phone buzzed and I glanced down at a text from Caroline: _meet me by the car asap_

Apparently Bonnie got the same text and we exchanged glances.

"Um, excuse us for a second," Bonnie said cheerfully, linking arms with me and quickly leading us back to the car, where we met a confused Elena and a freaked out Caroline.

"What's going on?" Elena asked as Caroline ushered us closer, glancing over our shoulders, before flipping her phone around to show us a picture.

"So, _totally by accident_, I stumbled over this picture of this woman in one of Alaric's boxes—like it just came out, I didn't mean too!" Caroline hissed, looking uneasy. "But she…" I had a feeling I knew where this was headed.

"Oh my God!" Bonnie's mouth fell open as she snatched the phone from Caroline, her eyes flying up to meet mine. "She looks like you! Like…"

"Like she could totally be my mom?" I guessed and Elena shifted uncomfortably. "Yeah. That's Alaric's… wife. Like, she went missing, presumed dead." Presumed vampire.

"She's… our birth mom." Elena murmured, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. Caroline and Bonnie gawked at us. "I was going to tell you, but things have been a little crazy this week, and I haven't had a chance to talk to you guys alone…"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Bonnie held out a hand, furrowing her eyebrows. "Hold up!"

"You guys are _adopted_?!" Caroline whisper-shouted, looking completely taken aback.

"But… when? How?" Bonnie glanced between us.

Elena's hand curled around mine and I gave it a comforting squeeze, leaning closer to her. "We literally found out, like, two days ago. You know how I get when I research things," I shrugged. "One thing led to another…"

"Talk about awkward," Caroline murmured. "And now he's going to be our history teacher? Holy shit, does he _know_?"

"I think it's pretty obvious, Care," Elena stated dryly.

"Does Jenna know?" Bonnie asked, slowly handing the phone back to Caroline.

"That we're adopted? Probably. That Alaric was with our birth mom? Probably not."

* * *

If anyone noticed the sudden weird looks Bonnie and Caroline were sending Alaric, nobody acted like they did or said anything. Not much longer after, Caroline and James completely disappeared, but I doubted they were very far away because the gray was still twirling around in my ring. I wondered what it _meant_ and what James could possibly be. Maybe a troll. I bet he was a hideous troll and was using magic to make his appearance pretty.

"Rissa," Alaric shoved a box into my arms. "Kitchen."

"Gotcha."

The great thing about Alaric was he worked around my way of being. He picked up on the fact that I was thinking, and instead of spewing out a sentence worth of unimportant words, only told me what I needed to know. I really didn't want to linger on why and how he knew to do that, thinking about Isobel made my head hurt. It just didn't make _sense_. Which led to the whole Fae thing. And by the time I reached the kitchen, I was ready to slam my face into the box.

I needed some mind-numbing distractions. Time to ask Noah what was going on in her drama filled world. Her reply was instant. I'd come to find out that Jenny, her BFF, was now being included in Noah's lifestyle, and was really diggin' the whole vampire scene. Noah had also befriended Olivia somewhat, which meant she was now sort of friends with Jeb and Sammy. Apparently a few weeks ago, the five of them went out with a friend of Jeb's, and Jenny had fallen instantly in love with him. But he was apparently hungup on this chick who was no good for him and was leading him around.

Noah: _she claims her phone is broken, __but if she has enough money to live in Chelsea then she has enough money to fix her phone. Its been a week_.

All these things I suddenly cared about. Massively. Because I'd rather this then think about impossible things that would only lead to more frustrating research.

Me: _fake. This is so fake. Total bs. She's lying_.

It felt like by the time I hit send, my phone was already buzzing. Noah texted like a demon, Christ. I opened the large blockage of text only to realize it wasn't Noah who sent it, but Damon.

Damon: _it's more than just a 'fucking crush'. You have no idea what you do to me, I can't control myself at all around you and you make me feel so fucking nervous. And happy. Really happy. _

I sucked in a breath. Oh God. Oh God, oh God, oh God. My heart leap, bouncing, as I continued reading his text. Why was he sending me all this…? He knew I wasn't pissed off at him anymore.

Damon: _I know I made it seem like one way this morning, but I do want to take it slow with you. I've always rushed into everything, kissing was never a second thought, and even when I was with Katherine, sex was just something that kind of happens right away. But everything is special when it's with you. Every little damn thing. It drives me wild and I can't keep my hands off you, because I think about how I'm the first person to do this. Nobody has ever put their hands on you like I have. You've never wanted anyone to put their hands on you like I have. And I know you say that being with me is special enough, but I don't want it to be a in the heat of the moment thing. I want you, completely, when we're stupidly in love. I want to cherish every inch of you. I want to do everything right, everything romantically and special, because I want to be your first and only._

I wasn't sure how many times I had reread the text. It was more like a letter than a text. I didn't think it'd matter how many hundreds of years would go by, Damon, at his core, was stuck in the eighteen hundreds, trying to woo me with sweet words. I knew there was a hidden romantic under all that murderous dickery, the fact that he had been so loyal to Katherine for all these years spoke that loudly. But for him to turn all his attention to me so completely was beyond anything I could ever conceive. Each word had my heart racing just a little bit faster, and I wasn't sure if I'd ever be able to fully wrap my mind around it all. He wanted us to be _in love _before we hopped into bed together.

Damon wanted to be _in love_.

With me.

He couldn't just say this kind of stuff in a text message.

I didn't even know how I was feeling!

I wanted to giggle and be stupid, and I wanted to kiss him, and I wanted to punch him in the face for just pouring this out at me! He was doing it all wrong! I was the one who was supposed to be like this, and he was the one who was supposed to be… Whatever I was right now!

Damon just lived for one upping everything. I bet he was sitting around thinking, what can I spring on Clarissa that's Earth shattering? Maybe she'll fall down a flight of stairs!

This dick!

This overly romantic vampire dick!

He picked up on the first ring.

"_Stop freaking out_," he sounded vaguely amused and so very calm.

"I'm not freaking out!" I hissed back, glancing around before scurrying into the bathroom and locking the door. "What the fuck, Damon!"

"_You're freaking out_. _I knew you'd freak out. This kind of talk scares the shit out of you. I think you're afraid of commitment_."

"I'm not fucking afraid of commitment!" Why did everyone _say _that? Was Caroline and Damon just friggin' conspiring against me somewhere?

"_You are. That's half the reason why you're obsessed with Disney. It's the ultimate protection. Disney relationships aren't _real_, so you're safe. Too bad for you I'm going to romance the fuck out of you and it's going to be so Disney, it'll make everyone throw up in their mouths._"

I sputtered, my face heating up. "But—you! You're a… a neck snapping, killing machine of pure vampire dickery!" I stammered. "I mean, I know you've got this—this romantic side, shit, I do know, but Damon! The things—the things you texted to me! You know it hasn't even been a week since you decided you wanted to be with me instead? Fucking saying you don't want to rush into anything, but you want to be my first and only! You have dove off the deep end. Just a few weeks ago you're telling me you have zero humanity! And now you're—"

"_You saw through all that_," Damon dismissed. "_Relax, birdhouse. I'm just letting you know how things are going to go. I know you aren't in love with me yet. And I'm not in love with you _yet_. But it's happening._"

"Nothing is happening! This isn't—people don't… I…" I was fumbling, trying to think clearly, as my heart pounded loudly in my chest. I knew how I felt, I knew how Damon felt. I knew, without a doubt, that he was honest when he picked me over Katherine. But this…

This was…

It was taking it a step further!

I knew I was completely taken with him, I knew I wanted to keep him, and remember him, and adore him until I died—but that…

"_Katherine was never my true love._"

My heart scattered inside my chest. Jesus. Jesus. Fuck.

"Damon, you can't talk like that," I snapped in a panic. "She is what she is, and you don't have to make it less just because—"

"_The moment I kissed you, your heart started._"

I nearly dropped the phone, choking on a gasp. My legs gave out from under me and I skidded down the wall. Oh my God. Oh my God. _OH MY GOD_. "I… You…?" _WHAT_?!

"_Just find who you love through true love's kiss_," Damon quoted back at me playfully and my mind fell blank. "_I've watched a dozen Disney movies. I kissed you and you came back to life. True love. It's out of my hands, Claryfairy, Disney dictates._"

I giggled.

Hysterically.

"You're the Prince of Vampire Dickery."

"_I'm a fucking God. I have the power to kill and grant life_."

"This isn't possible," none of this was possible. He was right. I was freaking out. But I had good reason to be freaking out! This kind of stuff just doesn't happen! "This is happening way too fast! I don't… I mean I just don't…"

"_Says who? What about us is typical, Clary? You're a body snatcher fairy-thing and we became friends after I snapped your neck. You find my dickery amusing instead of being pissed at me for being the way I am. I've been waiting for this, for you, since before becoming a vampire. I know how you feel, you've never felt an inkling of what you do for me before, you _need _me in a way that you've never needed anyone before. Fuck, I make you feel safe. I've made you feel that way since the beginning. Not only do you feel it, but you said it to my face, you feel like you can be completely yourself with me in a way that nobody will ever understand_. _It hasn't been a month, it's been always that we've been waiting for each other_."

"I'm in a romance novel with a murderous vampire." That's what this is.

"_Fuck that. We're the authors of our story. And it's going to be filled with horrible mischief and dickery and murder_." Damon stated pleasantly. "_Murder and Disney_."

Giddiness bounced through me, a tiny smile tilting across my lips. "It doesn't have to be Disney to be special, D. I told you, it doesn't matter, because everything involving you is special."

"_It's going to be Disney_."

"That's not realistic. Like you said, real relationships aren't Disney, and first times are usually awkward and shit. If we're both caught up in a the moment, I don't think it's going to be put on pause because you want it to be magical and filled with true love-ness."

"_I am not going to fuck this up_."

"Even if I said I wanted it _Damon_?"

"_Damon can be Disney_."

"Damon can rip my clothes off with his teeth." I shot back.

"_No you're getting soft kisses and romantic things_."

"You're going to fuck me the way I want to be fucked, I own Little Damon, Mr. Only Me Forever! _Forever_! Which means you have to turn me into a vampire and I'm gonna run around naked just like you! I swear to God, if you want to get romantic, you better throw detached heads at my window instead of rocks! I love my vampire dickery, so don't take that away from me! Stay the way you are!" I just said _love _to Damon! Shit! "Fuck you, Damon, you bastard vampire and your stupid romantic Disney talk that freaks me out! I'm hanging up!"

I snapped my phone shut which swallowed his laughter. Ugh!

I was _not _going to survive Damon. He was going to devour me, consume me, and set me alight inside. My heart was bouncing with nerves and a giddiness that had me feeling breathless. With a huff, I stood and threw open the door to find an awkward looking Matt on the other side. He jerked backwards.

"Uh…" he shifted his weight between feet, making a face. "I accidentally overheard the last bit of what you were saying…"

"Phone sex." I shrugged casually. "It's how I make money."

Matt raised his eyebrows. "Whatever you and… Damon do, hey, it's whatever, I'm not judging. I'm going to pretend I never heard anything."

"THAT WASN'T DAMON IT WAS A STRANGER!" I burst out, my cheeks growing hot. He bounced backwards and raised his hands in surrender. "God, Matt, isn't it acceptable I talk dirty and weird to some creepy old man?!"

"Okay you talk dirty to strangers for money! Whatever you want!"

* * *

Honestly, Jeremy was more than relieved when Damon texted him asking (informing) him to help with his 'devious' plan. Since Logan was currently helping Alaric move, his house would be completely empty. And since Damon couldn't enter without an invite, it only made sense that Jeremy was to break in. Perfect plan. Damon should get all the gold stars for coming up with sneaky vampire plans that were total unique and positively evil.

But it beat hanging around here with the awkward tense between he and Tyler. Hell, it was just awkward all around. There was some weird Alaric-Jenna-Logan triangle going on, Caroline and Bonnie were suddenly weird, Elena and Matt had tension and Clare was just completely zoned out.

And then there was that James guy.

He seemed pretty okay.

Hopping into Damon's car to do some kind of vampire bullshit seemed to becoming a habit, but Jeremy wasn't complaining.

"I'm surprised you have me here instead of Clare," Jeremy said after a moment, subtly trying to scope out whether the two were in a fight or not. He hadn't really heard much other than 'Little Damon' and infuriated shouts.

But Clare wasn't the type that was able to stay angry for very long, given her short attention span, so Jeremy assumed their fight had ended minutes after it began. _And_ Damon seemed to be in a really upbeat mood. But maybe they were still fighting, hence him being here instead of Clare. Jeremy hoped that meant he wasn't trapped in the car with a manic vampire in the middle of a fight with his sister.

Damon tilted his blue gaze toward Jeremy, his brow furrowed, as though what Jeremy had just said was _crazy_. "Clary isn't stuck in the same area as the guy who dated the same chick as her. You should be _thanking_ me for coming to the rescue." He made a show of rolling his eyes over dramatically, as if he were doing _Jeremy _a favor.

Jeremy's lips twitched upward as warm, surprised, gratitude spread through him. He bobbed his head in acceptance, relaxing a little. "Apology accepted."

And maybe, just maybe, Damon felt _a little _bad for ditching him last night.

It took an all of three minutes of standing outside of Logan Fell's house as Damon, crouched down in front of his door, looking totally _not_ inconspicuous, attempting to pick the lock, for Jeremy to regret everything.

He was a _vampire_ and they were trying to break into a house in the most normal way possible. What was the point of being supernatural if he wasn't going to use any of his abilities?

"I can feel you judging me," Damon muttered, tossing the bobby pin away in frustration. "So stop it."

"Why don't you just rip the door off the hinges?" Jeremy suggested helpfully.

"Right, because that won't be odd or suspicious at _all_," Damon scoffed and Jeremy's eyebrows rose as Damon pulled out what looked like a credit card, trying to stuff it into the door.

What the hell was he doing?

"What do you even need a card for? You compel everyone for shit." Jeremy wondered incredulously. "Oh wait let me guess, just in case you ever needed to break into someone's house, right?"

"Don't need your commentary."

"This is like an adept lock and you're like a level one in the lockpicking skill."

"Oh my God."

"You shouldn't have accepted the quest, Damon."

"This is why you have no friends." The vampire snapped, irritated, but the attempt at a jab rolled right over the youngest Gilbert and he grinned.

"_This _is why _you _have no friends," Jeremy shot back and Damon lifted his head, holding Jeremy's amused gaze for a moment. A look of consideration crossed the vampire's face before he nodded in amused agreement, shrugging a shoulder, in a 'what can you do' kind of way. "Just break a window."

"No," Damon returned to fiddling with the card. "If it looks like an obvious break in, he'll _know _we broke in and stole the watch. Which, by the way, will let him know that we can be out in daylight."

"But you can't go in without an invite, so he'll be confused and think some kids took it. We'll steal a bunch of other shit too."

Damon paused, glancing back at Jeremy with approval. "I like the way you think." The vampire announced and Jeremy had to resist rolling his eyes. It was a difficult task. Damon easily bounced to his feet, smashing the little window by the door in with his elbow.

"See? We could've been done already if you had just listened to me." Jeremy said as Damon unlocked the door via little broken window.

"Sorry, dear," Damon shot back sarcastically, making a big show of opening the door and gesturing for Jeremy to enter.

Jeremy figured he should have had more of an issue with breaking and entering someone's house, and he wondered what he meant when he only felt annoyed at the prospect of trying to find his watch. Shouldn't he at least be feeling guilty? Or anxious? Though, he guessed it was better this way. _And _he had every right to be here!

Logan stole his magical pocket watch _first_.

"We should've brought over bras and left them thrown around the house," Damon said from the doorway as Jeremy continued to creep into the house.

"I'm sure Jenna will see what a scumbag he is soon enough," Jeremy murmured distractedly, going through a drawer of what looked like an assortment of random junk. "He's not sticking up for himself and Clare's really tearing into him. Jenna isn't gonna like a guy who can't deal with her bullshit. Logan Fell means _vagina wig_, just so you know. If you hear Clare talking about it, she's talking about him."

"Vagina wig?" Damon repeated as though he didn't know what to make of it.

"Yeah." Jeremy, for whatever reason, decided to check under the couch just _in case_. "She's my sister, so I'm stuck with her. I have no idea why you're willingly hanging out with her, though. I mean, other than the fact that you're both crazy assholes."

"Don't talk about your sister that way," Damon chastised teasingly. "And what can I say? I'm just _glamoured _by her."

If Clare was able to _Glamour _people, it would explain _so much_. It had become something expected, people flocking to his sisters. Clare had the natural ability to weave strangers through her fingers, all seeming way too hopeful to do as she pleased. Elena had a similar effect and Jeremy wondered if she had some kind of Glamour ability too. It was difficult to be seen when his sisters shined so brightly. There just wasn't anything interesting about him, especially when he had been painfully shy as a child. The Gilberts had two daughters, and then that forgettable shy kid who hid behind his mother's legs, or behind Clare.

"So… You seem…" Damon began suddenly and Jeremy glanced over at the vampire. He was standing in the doorway, eyeing Jeremy. "_Okay_-ish. With the whole…" he gestured randomly with his hands. "Adoption thing."

"I always told them they were adopted." Jeremy shrugged, moving into the kitchen. "And it's not like _I _was adopted, so I really have nothing to get emotional over. They're my sisters, even if they aren't."

Jeremy was honestly more worried about how Elena was taking this. He hadn't had time to really talk to her about it. He knew, without a doubt in his mind, that this would affect her the hardest. If it had bothered Clare at all, she would have reacted much differently regardless if the world around her was crumbling while Elena would suck it up and smile.

"Hear from that girl?" Damon called back to him as Jeremy rummaged through more drawers.

"…No," Jeremy muttered, knowing Damon could hear him just fine. "I don't think she even realizes I deleted her from facebook, or haven't been texting her…" It _stung_. He was so _forgettable_. "Is this therapy with Dr. Damon?"

"Try his room," Damon suggested cheerfully, switching the subject easily, much to Jeremy's relief. He wasn't ready to discuss Vicki right now.

But it was nice to know that when he was ready, Damon wouldn't mind hearing it. He might've been a murdering dick, but Damon was proving to be a decent friend.

_If _Jeremy could call him that. He really wasn't sure what he and Damon were, but it was more than just him being the younger brother of the girl Damon liked. Which was kind of cool. And Jeremy dug being a part of things, even if they were wildly illegal and highly immoral. It made him feel like he had a place, a purpose, a _role_. He _wasn't _going to be the quiet forgotten Gilbert anymore, he decided. One sister was some kind of fairy, the other a doppelgänger with creepy vampires after her, so that meant Jeremy had to be the awesome brother who kicked ass.

"Found it!" Jeremy called down, grinning happily as he picked up his pocket watch. It had been sitting, right in the open, on the dresser. What an idiot.

Though, Logan probably wasn't expecting anyone to go steal it and so had no reason to hide it. Jeremy wasn't ever going to leave the house, or his room, without it on his person again.

Damon snatched Jeremy's wrist the moment he crossed through the doorway and forced him to hold his hand up, palm facing upward. "What do you desire most, Jeremy Gilbert?" Damon wondered in a low, mockingly airy, voice. He squinted his eyes as he grabbed the pocket watch from Jeremy's other hand and dropped it into his open palm.

Jeremy stared back at him flatly. Deciding to humor the vampire, he slowly opened the pocket watch. It looked more like a compass now, and Jeremy suddenly understood the _Pirates of the Caribbean_ reference that Damon was going for as the red needle twitched and ticked over to Damon's direction.

The vampire gasped. "Me. You want _me _most!"

Jeremy opened his mouth, to comment, when the needle twitched and began turning in a different direction. Damon's attention snapped back to it and dread jolted through Jeremy as the needle continued to move. Oh God, what if it was that other vampire…?

"Is it supposed to do this?" Jeremy hissed as Damon shifted closer to him, his gaze flickering about.

"Shut up." Damon murmured quietly. "And move back into the house."

"Did you two really just break into Logan's house?"

Jeremy felt a little bit better about jumping at the sound of Stefan's amused voice, because Damon did too. The two of them snapped their head toward the youngest Salvatore who was now standing behind them, grinning.

"You and little miss Judgy vetoed my killing spree idea," Damon reminded with a huff as Jeremy focused on trying to get his heart from ripping out of his chest. "So here we are. Stealing. What are _you _doing here?"

"I was going to burn his house down because I wasn't sure how to get in without being invited." Stefan retorted sarcastically, green eyes flickering toward Jeremy as Damon frowned. "If we only take the watch, he's going to piece things together and know we have human help."

"That's why we're going to steal some other things." Jeremy shrugged a shoulder, pocketing his magical, vampire finding, watch-compass.

"Take all his spoons." Stefan suggested with an amused grin.

* * *

"So?" Caroline pressed, her eyebrows raised expectantly, as she tapped her fingers against the steering wheel to the latest pop song playing on the radio. "Tell me how it's going with the hottie brothers. I haven't heard from you guys in _forever_!"

We were following Logan's Hummer, as Logan decided to be a real loser and treat everyone to early dinner. James had opted out, and since he drove Matt and Tyler, they left with him. And Jeremy had just disappeared. I suspected he and Damon were off doing some kind of vampire dickery that they'd fill me in on later.

"You just don't answer any of your texts." I pointed out unhappily, sulking in the passenger seat.

"Told you, my phone just doesn't get your texts!"

"But they get _James'_?" Bonnie asked from the back.

"This isn't about me, this is about you two. Now spill."

"Well…" Elena began, in a gossipy kind of voice. "Clare met _Little Damon_."

Elena is dead to me. I whipped my head around to give her a betrayed look that she _grinned _back at. Dead. So dead to me. Sister who? I have no sister.

"_You what_!" Bonnie cried, her mouth falling open in surprise as Caroline made some kind of weird noise. "You're calling it _Little Damon_?" Bonnie's surprise cracked and she broke out laughing.

Oh God. Mistakes are about to be made in this car.

"What do you mean you met _Little Damon_?" Caroline shrieked, smacking my arm painfully. Ouch! God! "Um, _hello_, best friend here? You should've called me the _second_ after you did whatever you did that warranted a meeting with his penis!" She glanced at me angrily. "Have you…? Oh my God, did you have _sex_?"

"No! He just—well, we were making out and it… kind of jabbed me, and I didn't know what to say about it, so I just… I was like 'Little Damon is jabbing me'!" I cried in defense and Bonnie leaned forward, wrapping her arms around my head.

"You poor little virgin," Bonnie cooed softly. "It's okay. Mama Bonnie is here. Did the scary penis scare you?"

Take away my life, I want to die.

"Oh, that doesn't count!" Caroline scoffed, sounding relieved. "You have to actually see it."

"I'm sure Damon would have no problem whipping it out and swinging it around," Bonnie teased as she let me go. I groaned, my face on fire, as I desperately tried not to think about earlier today.

"He already did that. I was on the toilet and he came in and ripped his clothes off and was like LOOK AT IT!" Basically. Caroline and Bonnie burst out laughing instead of taking pity on me.

"Mmhm, and then you hopped into the shower with him!" Elena threw out. "Don't try to sound innocent! You were wrapped around him like you were climbing a tree!"

Lies. All lies!

"Oh my God!" Caroline screeched.

"You're all grown up!" Bonnie cried excitedly. "Our little Clare, climbing sexy guys like it's no big deal!"

"I had my clothes on!" I buried my face in my hands. "He grabbed me and pulled me in and I'm weak to his Damon charm! But it doesn't matter, because he just Disney-zoned me."

"He what?" Bonnie asked, confused, as Caroline turned to give me a pointed look.

"Damon, that sex on legs, bad boy?"

"Yes."

"Disney-zone _you_? Miss True Love before hand-holding?"

"Yes."

"You have been Disney-zoned. By Damon."

"Yes."

"What does that even _mean_?" Bonnie demanded.

"It's like being friendzoned, only we're kind of, not really, dating—"

"IT MEANS HE WON'T HAVE SEX WITH HER, BONNIE! IT MEANS CLARE RUINED DAMON! SHE'S… SHE'S MADE HIM… _DISNEY_!" Caroline burst out unhappily, like I had announced the worst possible thing in the entire world.

"Okay, sure," Elena scoffed. "I'll believe it when I see it. Just this morning he was all over you. What makes you say you've been _Disney-zoned_? I don't think Damon could keep it Disney even if it'd save his life."

...That was true. Damon was all talk, at this point.

"If he's letting her name his dick _Little Damon_, then I think he's willing to go Disney for her." Caroline said and I stared at her oddly. Was calling his dick _Little Damon _such a big deal?

"_Is _he little?" Bonnie wondered curiously and I flushed. How the hell was I supposed to know that! I had nothing to compare it too! And what was considered little?

"He's not happy about the nickname. Like at all." I shrugged awkward, pulling out my phone. "That's why he made me look at it."

"Yeah but he still wants to be with you. That's like a deal breaker for a lot of guys." Caroline said dismissively as I handed Elena my phone with the text Damon sent me. Sheesh. Guys were oversensitive. "What is that? You better read it out loud! No more Elena-Clare secrets, damn it!"

"It's more than a fucking crush," Elena said in a deep voice and I instantly regretted giving her my phone. "You have _nooooo ideeeaaaaa _what you do to me. Well, yeah, because you don't have a penis, and so you can't possible know what it feels to have a boner. Oh here, look, further to prove what I'm saying: I can't control myself at all around you!"

Hilarious. Oh Elena, you've got me in friggin' stitches. Seriously. Har. Har. Har. She gave me a sassy look and I made a face back.

"You make him feel nervous! And happy!" Bonnie gushed, snatching the phone from Elena. "Everything is special when it's with you! Oh my God! I didn't know Damon had this side to him!"

This was such a mistake.

"I think he's being possessive." Elena said, eyeing the text message like it was something obscene. "It drives him wild because he's, ohhh, look at that, the first person to put his hands on you like that. Possessive! He's just excited because you're a virgin and that strokes his ego."

"I bet it strokes something else too." Caroline piped and I seriously thought about throwing myself from the car. Bonnie gasped, smacking Elena's hands away as she drew my phone closer to her.

"But I don't want it to be a in the heat of the moment. I want you, completely, when we're _STUPIDLY IN LOVE_! OH MY GOD!" Bonnie was freaking out, bouncing in her seat, and I sunk lower in the seat, feeling horribly embarrassed.

"He wants to _do it_ with you when you two are _in love_?!" Caroline cried and Elena sat back with a huff. If Damon ever found out Bonnie and Caroline knew about this stuff, I'm pretty sure I'd have a lot of funerals to attend.

"He goes on to say, oh my God, he goes on to say, I want to cherish every inch of you! I want to do everything right, everything romantically and special, because I want to be your first and only!" Bonnie was just going nuts.

Caroline slammed on the brakes and I choked, flailing my arms, as the seatbelt dug into my throat. Freakin' thanks. She grabbed my shoulders, shaking me.

"You're his endgame!" Caroline cried with a wide grin and I stared back at her in horror. "I knew he really liked you! I said he was your type! I knew all along!"

"No! What! No!" This wasn't happening. Oh my God. This just wasn't happening, we weren't talk about this! My heart stumbled awkwardly in my chest as I struggled to catch my breath.

"Yes! Yes! He wants to be in _love _with you before you guys have _sex_! He wants it special because he plans on being with you forever! He's everything you ever wanted, and he wants to do everything Disney!" Caroline gushed with a giddy smile, turning back to the steering wheel. I was fairly sure I was about to throw up.

"You two aren't even _dating_." Elena shook her head. "He can't be saying all this stuff! How is he supposed to know you're _the one_?"

"He's twenty-four, Elena," Bonnie said with a sigh. "He knows what he wants. Guys usually know what they want right away."

"Excuse me if I'm having a hard time believing that he's suddenly changing everything about himself for a girl he's only known for a month! You said it yourself, Clare, that you weren't going to just accept Logan without proof of him being a changed man! Words don't mean _anything_." Elena didn't know what the fuck she was talking about.

"He's not changing for _me_," I snapped back at her. "I like him the way he is. I don't even _want _Disney Damon. He's changing for _Stefan_." Was she seriously blind to that?

Surprise flashed across Elena's face but Bonnie leaned forward, cutting between us.

"No. You're not doing this. You _want _Disney! And he's willing to give you Disney! What are you doing?"

"Clare's afraid of—" Caroline began and I cut her off with a whine.

"I'm not afraid of commitment, Care!"

"Yeah you are. You're rationalizing everything about something that can't be rationalized! I don't know why you're so afraid to admit to yourself what's going on and give in and let yourself experience something amazing, especially when it's happening regardless!" Caroline waved her hand about airily. "And you, Elena, you need to support your sister's relationship! Until Damon gives you a reason to not trust him with her, try to keep an open mind! I don't know what he's done in his past that's made Stefan and you to be so wary, but if Stefan is willing to give him a chance…"

"But Clare's never been with anyone before," Elena said quietly, her dark eyes meeting mine. "I just don't want you rushing into anything or giving yourself away to him so quickly. I'd feel this way no matter who it was. We've been through so much, I just don't want you to be hurt ever again. Especially not by something I can help prevent."

I softened at Elena's words, even feeling a little warmed by them. I smiled at her faintly.

"Lena, Damon's gonna hurt her. She's gonna hurt him. It's unavoidable, it's how relationships are." Bonnie said comfortingly. "But Clare has to learn and live. And if Damon's serious about what he's saying…"

"I'm freaking out." I suddenly blurted out. "Like I already know that if I can give anyone that kind of power over me, I'm okay giving it to Damon. I know I like him, and I know he likes me, but when I think about it in terms of a relationship or—or being… being in love, and him picking me, and him actually wanting to do Disney or be romantic—I just… I completely freak out. It terrifies me, and I don't know why! Even though I trust him! Even though I want to be with him!"

"Don't worry about it," Caroline said after a moment as I pulled my legs up, hugging them to me. "It's pretty normal to feel that way, especially with someone so terrified of commitment like you are."

"I'm not…" maybe I _was_. God, I didn't really know. "I guess… I am afraid. Not of commitment, but just… Of everything. It just doesn't seem possible."

"That's because it happened, like, overnight." Bonnie pointed out and I frowned. Way to make it sound like I'm overreacting. "That's why it's good Damon is willing to take everything slow and be patient with you."

But he's a vampire that runs around killing people.

"Do you call Stefan's _Little Stefan_, too?" Caroline always seemed to know when I was suddenly done talking about something and my lips sprang upward.

"She calls it _Impressive Hung Stefan_." I chirped before Elena had a chance to speak. Ha _ha_.

* * *

I threw the door to Jeremy's room open as dramatically as I could, a box of assorted leftovers in hand from the restaurant. I was unsurprised to see Damon, but I _was_ surprised to see Stefan. Both vampires glanced at me, Damon's gaze lingering just a few seconds longer than Stefan's.

"We broke into Vagina Wig's house," Jeremy said, not looking away from whatever video game was on the TV. I maneuvered between them, dropping the leftovers down next to Jeremy and plopped down at his desk. "Thanks. We got the watch. And then we stole his spoons."

I snorted, pleased. "That should infuriate him forever." Excellent.

That's when I spotted it.

Sitting on Jeremy's bed was a pudgy, overly fluffy, little rainbow colored plush panda.

"That's for you," Damon murmured distractedly and I squealed excitedly, leaping onto the bed and tackling the stuffed animal into a hug. It was just so _freakin' soft_! "A Sorry-I-Made-You-Look-At-My-Dick present."

"Gross, I don't want to know!" Jeremy grumbled. "I thought we were there to have an alibi."

Pfft! "Damon never does things for an alibi!"

"Worst twenty minutes of my entire existence." Stefan said with a frown. "I never want to step foot into another Toys R Us ever again."

"Mm, Stef and I had to kill a woman out in the parking lot to feel like vampires again." Damon agreed pleasantly. "So maybe you should name the panda after her, since she was sacrificed for your petty happiness. I think her name was Bertha."

"This is everything I have ever wanted!" I gushed happily, launching myself at my vampire. Damon let me throw him to the floor, shifting so he was lying flat on his stomach, the controller in front of him as he continued gaming. Like nothing even happened.

"Until the next thing," Stefan was such a little jerk today.

"No thank you hugs for _you_. Ever." I told him seriously, happily sitting on Damon's back.

"How will I ever survive?" Stefan wondered sarcastically.

"You won't." Jeremy said gravely. "Because Damon and I are killing you."

"Ha!" Damon grinned. "Suck it, Steffy. We teamed up."

Bonding over betrayal and murder. Adorable.

"Clare," Elena appeared in the doorway, holding my beloved Angel boxset. I grinned excitedly, pelting her with the panda. She shrieked as I bounced upward, grabbing her hand and skipping down the hall.

"We're not going to stop watching Angel," I told her happily. "Not until we've watched all of it. You only get two bathroom breaks! Use them wisely!"

I hoped Elena knew I wasn't kidding.

* * *

thIS CHAPTER GUYS I HATE IT. There was a lot of face-to-keyboard frustration, and most (all) of it was because of the mushy parts. Well, there's a lot of things that I didn't like. This is basically filler, I know. Nothing really happened other than me trying to establish the fuckery that is Darissa. Darissa becoming a thing so quickly really threw me. Ah. Well. Hope you enjoyed Clarissa's spasticness.

SECOND reason for why this chapter took so long THE MORTAL INSTAGSFHABFS OMG THIS BOOK SERIES. I AM SO IN LOVE WITH SIMON. The main character's name is CLARY. I just can't. I'm so amused.  
THIRD reason I STARTED WATCHING LOST GIRL OH MY GOD I AM IN LOVE.  
FOURTH reason I started watching/playing Defiance. I made my other roommate name his character Alaric Salvatore. GUYS, CLARISSA'S FACECLAIM IS IN DEFIANCE, SHE WORKS (OWNS?) WHAT APPEARS TO BE A BROTHEL I'm so done.

I want to freakin' hug a lot of you for your reviews. I especially love when you guys leave me long ones, or tell me stuff that's happening in your life!  
I think it should also be stated that for the most part, I'm **making shit up **about Fae. I literally know nothing about fairies, other than iron hurts them! And a lot of you have actually GIVEN me ideas! Thank you!

QUESTION TIME and ho boy there are a lot. :D

**Q: When will Katherine come in?**  
Soon. Well. It's difficult to say without giving it away completely. But they're going to find out she's not in the tomb in a very different way. I'm so excited to get to writing that part.

**Q: Katherine/Clarissa bitch fight?**  
Clarissa would get her ass kicked.  
Katherine and Clarissa are going to have a different kind of bitch fight. More like 'who can ruin the other's plans more' kind of fighting.  
And then sweet, sweet love making.  
I'M SORRY I'M KIDDING. (I ship Karissa)

**Q: TEEN WOLF CROSSOVER?**  
OH GOD I'M SORRY THIS ISN'T A REAL THING! It's a shit 300 word thing I did real quick on tumblr for the giggles. Which, I've been asked about some of the other things I've written on there like the **Toddler Stefan **one. Yes! There are plans to continue that! I've just been so caught up in this chapter.

**Q: Stefan/OC**  
I love, love, love the ideas you guys have given me and the fact that you'd read the fic if I wrote it! I'm definitely going to have to write one now!

**Q: Elijah/OC**  
I love your idea, Dark-Tiger! It's perfect!

**Q: Secret Circle fanfic?**  
I still haven't read the books, but I'm loving the show! As of right now, I have no idea how the fanfic would go. But as soon as I get to know the story/read the books, I'll let you guys know :D

**Q: Ian Somerhalder/Mia Kirshner fanfic?**  
That's what I'm assuming you mean! I don't know. I don't really know anything about either of those two. If you really wanted it, I'm sure I could do a few shorts!

**Q: THERAPY THINGS?**  
"Though I feel like Scott might end up dying after one of those sessions."/"Maybe Elijah with is strong family-sense will also track the other originals to a therapist"  
I'm laughing so hard I'm pretty sure I pulled something. Elijah/Salvatore therapy has to happen. Poor Scott. He's going to regret everything.

**Q: Teran who the F is your beta?**  
You guys are putting it so nicely, seriously, I'm SO SORRY about all the terrible grammar/spelling mistakes. There are three of us editing this story, one is a friend and the other is a roommate, but half the time I get really impatient. Like it's a whole day process to edit this fanfic because I go back and rewrite things and delete things and change things. When I write, I don't read what I've written, I just sort of push through and 70% has swiggles under it. Red ones and blue ones and green ones and microsoft is just like "WE DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO SPELL"  
the reason you guys are stuck with my crap is because after my friends go through it and fix everything up, right before I upload I freak out and start rewritting. i a y

**Q: Kickass!Jenna?**  
Yep. Of course Alaric is gonna teach Jenna how to slay vampires! And of course she's gonna stake Damon at least once!

**Q: Teen Wolf, Pretty Little Liars, Arrow?**  
I love how you guys are trying to ruin me by getting me into your fandoms. YOU ALREADY TRICKED ME WITH TEEN WOLF. OUCH. I started watching because I thought it was a fun show about werewolves now I'm sobbing. I'm not allowed to watch Arrow because I know stuck up comic fans. But sure, I'll check out Pretty Little Liars.

**Q: Supernatural?**  
It's okay guys, you can talk to me about your Supernatural feels. I know who the characters are, I don't think it's possible to be on tumblr and remain ignorant. I've been having dreams about them since they're on my dash so often. I'm very flattered that you think I'd write the characters well! I've talked Withery into it, so I'm pretty sure this weekend (for sure) we'll start it seriously.

**Q: Will Tyler's dad still die? Mason show up/die?**  
I'm not sure about Tyler's father yet. He might have to.  
Mason is still going to show up regardless. And that's all I can tell you!

**Q: Did Damon switch over to animal blood?**  
Clarissa was only trying to make Damon seem less like a tool to Bonnie, but it's sort of implied he's kind of on the animal blood since he's trying to be good!Damon. And by good!Damon, I mean, just less of a dick enough where he and Stefan can bro it up.

**Q: Rose?**  
I love Rose. I'll figure a way to work her into the story, I loved her friendship with Damon.

**Q: Isobel?**  
I HAVE SO MANY FEELS FOR HER! She IS a fantastic character, and I think a large motivation to throw away everything (Alaric, humanity) was based on protecting Elena. She will be making an appearance soon-ish.

**Q: Slater.**  
It's official. For the rest of this fanfic, no matter what Darissa is doing, you have to picture Slater's ghost just hovering near by like "guys no... stop making out, pls". I just... DARK-TIGER, OMG. Your review seriously killed me.  
I think on tumblr we'll continue from the Clarissa Has A Pet AU where Slater is just stuck bumming it with them. He's so much fun, I'm so sad he was killed off. Goddamn it Damon.

**Q: Klaus/Stefan friendship?**  
I'm not entirely sure. I would love them to be friends, I loved their bromance, but Stefan was Ripper Stefan and Klaus is a little psycho. I think I could figure a way to have them bro out.

**Q: originals/Klaus vs. Fae** **war?**  
I'm on the fence about this. Would you guys be okay with a war?  
I know I've, like, just destroyed the main plot at this point I AM SO SORRY, and there are a few sure fire ways I have cooking up for a war to (accidentally) be started. AHAHAHAHA.

**Q: Is Clarissa going to get some kickass powers?**  
More like bratty powers. No, but seriously, again, would you like her to have some? Given that she's not COMPLETELY as Fae are, if we decide to go down the power route, she's not gonna be anywhere near awesome as the powers I tend to give Fae. Suck it, Clarissa.

**Q: FAE THINGS.**  
There are a lot of questions concerning Fae and Clarissa! I'll try to answer them as best as I can without giving it away!

**Are Fairy/Fae different?**  
No. There is only one group of immortal beings called Fae which is the same as fairy!

**How was Slater able to know what she was from her eyes?**  
Slater is wearing a four leaf clover, Clarissa may or may not unknowingly have her eyes glamoured! I'm kind of big on shoving hints into this story, I've been hinting Clarissa glamouring abilities since nearly the beginning. A few of you mentioned it you noticed which made me feel a lot better about myself I was feeling like maybe I wasn't being subtle enough. Which was one of Noah's biggest purposes was to draw attention to it. Feeling that urgency to know Clarissa, despite it not being in her character to behave that way, being unable to leave, knowing she wouldn't like Clarissa as a person but being completely obsessed anyway! That one time Clarissa glamoured Damon into throwing the gps out the window was my favorite.

**Was Clarissa Everett a Fae/Clarissa Gilbert a Fae?/Is Body Snatching a Fae ability?**  
This is a big one. The Everett-Gilbert situation is tangled in there with Fae. That's all I can say. Body Snatching is not a Fae ability.

(A big friggin hug to Arabella who gave me some really great questions, which in turn, gave me some information about Fae I didn't know!) **Do Fae not like giving people their name (reason why Slater was surprised)? Can Fae take any shape?/Can Clarissa shapeshift? "The Fae each possess an Otherside Companion that takes the form of any type of Song Bird."  
**In this, to know a Fae's name is a very intimate thing, Fae don't give others their name because a Fae's true name can hold power over them/influence them. For Fae, names are more than just names, they're your very being. Damon knows who Clarissa is, knows about her being an Everett. Even if, say, Stefan knew to call Clarissa "Clarissa Everett", it wouldn't have the same power, because he doesn't _know _her because Clarissa is neither a Gilbert nor an Everett at this point, she's just Clarissa. I know guys, I've been throwing you the "nobody says mi nam lyk damon lol" and the whole "damon effects me by how he seiz mi nam!" since like chapter 4, I'm crazy about hints. SOMEONE TELL ME THEY PICKED UP ON IT AND THAT I'M NOT CRAP.  
**Can Fae take any shape?** MY Fae can only Glamour their appearance/hide. They can't shapeshift.  
I LOVE THIS OTHERSIDE COMPANION THING AND THE FACT THAT A SONG BIRD (blue canary) IS FITTING INTO THIS. I'll tell you outright, Clarissa made Damon her blue canary, and so, she made him her "otherside companion". I already had something worked out for that, but this just sounds so much cooler.

**Why isn't drinking Clarissa's blood harmful to Damon?/Do vampires need permission?**  
If Damon attempted to drink from a Fae, permission or not, it would nearly kill him.

**Why does whatever stalking Clarissa hate Stefan?**  
I guess I could tell you, since it's not REALLY spoiling anything. Unlike Damon, Stefan has poor control when it comes to blood. He can be dangerous. Maybe Clarissa's inability to be nice to Stefan is influenced more than just him being from a TV show/because he and Damon weren't getting along ;D

**Do Fae hate unicorns?**  
Yes.

**Clarissa doubting Damon's feelings because of glamour?**  
Nah, Clarissa's an asshole like that.  
And because of the blood bond, she's able to feel that they're legit.  
Also, Clarissa/Damon like each other because of each other. Her making him her "otherside companion" or her ability to glamour doesn't tie them to each other or anything. Like, Clarissa could go out and make someone her otherside companion, and they could've ended up doing what Katherine did to Damon. That and glamour isn't mind control. It's more like "hey just like me, come on, do it"-ish. Something that Jenna (and Alaric) are naturally immune too.  
WHICH, now that they're AWARE she can glamour, it's not going to be as effective. Especially once Jeremy goes on ebay and buys everyone four leaf clovers. Ha ha Clarissa is useless now.

so many questions I'm sorry this was so long. LOVE YOU GUYS, SERIOUSLY. i'm sorry about this chapter, things will be better next time. THANK YOU FOR READING.


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: shhh no

i'm more or less asleep, holy shit. but I just want to throw this at you guys because when I wake up, I'm diving straight into the next chapter. THIS CHAPTER and the next (possibly few) chapter are _sort of _filler. Plot is going to progress for Stefan's birthday which is a surprise. Unless you follow the tumblr and know all the secrets. But since I'm unable to do a time skip because skipping over an entire month is like, holy shit things happened, I decided to do a quick 'things that happened in October' and then a small Halloween thing. IT was supposed to be one chapter with each scene being a tiny thing that was 1-3k words each.

APPARENTLY IT'S EFFIN' IMPOSSIBLE TO WRITE SHORT SCENES OUT, SO WHATEVER. I just wasn't happy with brief descriptions and minimum dialog.

* * *

Sunday, October 3rd.

Angel & Pot Brownies

* * *

"Why are you still in your pajamas?"

Jesus Christ, Stefan. I rolled over onto my back, looking up at Stefan as he leaned against the couch, his arms curled around Elena's shoulders, his chin resting on top of her head. I was on the floor, among a sea of pillows.

"Why are you still a soulless monster?" I wondered sarcastically back at him, annoyed.

One, it was _Sunday_. Why would I be wearing normal clothes? Two, we were way behind on our Angel marathon because Elena deemed sleep and eating 'necessary'. Like if I was willing to not move from this spot and watch forty-five minute episodes (a daunting task despite it being Angel), then Miss I-Can-Sit-Still should have no friggin' problem.

The evil vampire from hell ignored me and focused solely on my happiness crushing sister. "Are you in need of rescue, fair maiden?" Elena tilted her head, smiling at Stefan adoringly as he kissed her forehead.

Ew, gag me.

"Desperately so," Elena joked and I rolled back onto my stomach, facing the screen, as the next episode started. Poe hopped closer, squawking happily at me. I grinned back. I loved my little Poe.

We were only on episode seventeen. _Season one_. I know. We should've at least been half way through Season Two by now. Whatever. The episode started out with Angel and Wesley enduring one of Cordelia's terrible plays.

"Oh look, it's an accurate representation of how I feel when being stuck in your company," Stefan said pleasantly and I tilted my head to look at him. He was now sitting next to Elena, looking very cuddly. "You're right, Clare, I _am _like Angel."

"Good. I'm glad I have you whipped." I shrugged my shoulders, stroking Poe's feathers comfortingly as he snuggled into the crook of my neck. "You're a sissy vampire with no backbone."

"Speaking of whipped vampires," I knew whatever Stefan was about to say, would be at Damon's expense. Pfft. "I see you're with your babysitter. Where's Damon?"

I threw Stefan a look, miffed. "Poe isn't my babysitter, he's my crow." Like, Jesus Christ, get with the friggin' program, Stefan.

"He's probably out romantically murdering people in Clare's name." Elena muttered dryly, leaning forward and snatching the bowl of popcorn from the floor.

Stefan tilted his green eyes from Elena, to me, and it was clear that he was considering that as a possibility. Oh jeez. "That _would _be very kind and thoughtful," I agreed cheerfully, just to irritate Elena. She scrunched her nose up at me as Poe squawking came off sounding very much like _laughter_. "But don't worry, Steffy. Damon's a clever vampire, he'll find his way home when he gets hungry."

Stefan and Elena threw me identical looks of revolution and horror. I frowned back at them, confused. Why were they looking at me like that?

"You let him _feed _from you?" Elena asked and I blinked. What the hell was she talking about? "I thought… that, you know, the whole biting thing was just a… _thing_. For you guys."

Wow.

"…I was making a _pet _reference. Like a dog that runs off will come back when he's hungry," my lips twitched upward. "It's okay, Laney. It's Damon. It's not your fault that both of you thought dirty things." You weirdos. I turned back to the TV just in time to see Angel rushing across the street to save a woman from being hit by a car. I friggin' loved this episode. "Aw, look at Angel, being an _angel_!"

"That's actually him forgetting he's a vampire and trying to kill himself," Stefan assured in a deadpan. Oh my God. "I know that face. I wear the same one often. He'd rather be hit by a car then listen to that girl for another second."

"You know, maybe he just got tired of being a sad sissy vampire and decided to attempt to feed." I suggested as Angel was promptly smacked by the car and thrown to the ground like a real man. "He's pulling a Damon, by jumping at the car to get them to stop."

"And there they go." Stefan mused. "Unaffected. Just like Damon's attempts at being evil."

Ha! Burned! And he's not even around to defend himself!

"If Angel was a real vampire, that car would've been totaled." I shrugged a shoulder. "He's weak and feeble, like _you_, Steffy."

"That's just like _you_, Clare," Stefan shot back sarcastically as Wesley and Cordelia helped Angel off the ground. I loved Cordelia, she gave zero fucks. "If I got hit by a car, you'd come rushing up to me, too, asking me what the actress was like."

"I'm pretty sure I'd be the one hitting you with the car," I hoped he realized comparing me to Cordelia was only a compliment. Hell yeah.

One thing I loved about Angel was how the show actually showed him walking away instead of pulling a disappearing act.

"Wow, that's totally realistic, and totally vampire like," Stefan said flatly. "He doesn't look like a creep at all."

Oh my God, zero appreciation for the greatness that is Angel. Stefan was totally jealous.

"That's how it's supposed to be done, instead of just disappearing, you know. At least Angel tries to blend in." I mean, _obviously_.

"Usually I just want to get away from you as fast as possible, I don't care who sees how supernatural I'm being." Stefan was a friggin' fire today, holy crap.

"Elena, your boyfriend is being a toolbag."

"Elena, your sister is being herself."

"I feel like _I'm_ the babysitter." Poor Elena.

I decided to gift her with silence… Until Rebecca, the actress Angel had saved from the car, burst into his office and demanded that they be alone.

"Of course she wants to talk to Angel _alone_," though I couldn't blame her. I'd probably fling myself at Angel too. And not because I had the feels, but because torturing him with hugs would be worth everything. And Angel just had this sad puppy look that begged for hugs.

"Wow, the fact that she's going to be a single episode love interest isn't at all obvious," Stefan deadpanned from behind me.

"Don't give into the sexual tension, Angel! You can never be happy, which means no sex! You'll turn into Evil Angel and go ripper!"

"Having sex makes him turn evil?" Stefan snorted and I tilted my gaze toward him, bobbing my head.

"Well," Elena yes! Show your support for the fandom I forced upon you! Educate Stefan's ignorant ass! "No. Angel just can't feel true happiness, otherwise the Gypsy curse placed upon him will be broken and he'll become a soulless monster. In this, he's the only vampire with a soul."

"He's like you Stefan."

"Wow, she instantly trusts him," Stefan ignored me loudly. Thanks, jerk. "For no apparent reason. What great plot development."

"Sorry actress lady, I can't help you because you make me feel special in my pants and if I feel happiness I'll run around killing people." Like Stefan. Probably.

Oh and look at that, she's being attacked in her home.

"Is that a ninja?" Stefan wondered as Angel burst through the window to engage the possible ninja.

"Suddenly, a wild Angel appears!"

Look at that fighting scene. Really intense, Angel. Good job.

"Just your local vampire stalking around your house." Stefan deadpanned. "Saving his one time love interest that makes literally zero sense."

"How'd he get inside if he wasn't invited?"

"The power of their sexual feelings overrides vampire law." Stefan quipped. "Better hope it doesn't blossom into true happiness." Oh snap, Angel doesn't have a reflection! The plot thickens! "No reflection, had an office without sunlight… Great deduction skills, he's a vampire. That's exactly how everyone reacts when realizing they're in the company of a vampire."

"Stay with me all night, Angel! You don't kill anymore, great! Oh look at how comfortable he is with just _telling _her he's a few hundred years old. They may experience true happiness."

"I don't understand, what's the point of watching this if you two are going to make snide comments every two seconds?" Elena demanded with a sigh causing Stefan and I to fall silent.

Whoops.

I kind of liked watching Angel with Stefan. Dry, sarcastic, mocking commentary was something I favored, even if it was about a favorite TV show.

"Oh look, Clare, it's _you_," Stefan said loudly drawing my attention back to the screen where Rebecca, the actress Angel had been protecting, was baring her neck and encouraging Angel to turn her. "Oh Angel, bite me! I want to be an immortal monster of darkness too! You can have what you've been craving all these long empty years!" Stefan said in a high pitched whiney voice.

"No, Rebecca," I mocked back. "You don't want this!"

"I wasn't afraid! When I looked in the mirror and only saw my reflection, I thought," Stefan mocked. "Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me? When will my reflection show the messed up Fairy I am inside?"

"Har har har, Stefan!" What a friggin' dick.

"Oh my God!" Elena cried as Angel stuffed one of those medical bags of blood into Rebecca's mouth. "Angel is losing his mind!"

"She gave him a happy pill!" I burst out giggling. "Angel is about to get Angelus! Mistakes are being had!"

"Clare, could we pause this real quick?" Elena asked, tilting my gaze toward her. She stared back at me with big, brown, eyes. "We've run out of popcorn…"

Ugh.

Fine.

Grumbling, I paused the episode and moodily snatched the bowl from her hand, trudging into the kitchen. Longest three minutes of my entire life. I wondered if this microwave was being slow on purpose. Angel just went evil, and I wanted to watch it _noooow_!

As I re-entered the living room, I discovered Stefan and Elena were now missing. Poe flapped over to me with a piece of paper in his beak. Real Harry Potter style. I gently took the paper from him.

_Dear Diary,  
__We have barred the gates but cannot hold them for long. The ground shakes, drums... drums in the deep. We cannot get out. A shadow lurks in the dark. We cannot get out... they are coming._

What the friggity flop was this?

…Was Stefan saying that this was how they felt about me? About watching _Angel_? I was gone for three friggin' minutes, what the _hell_?

Fuck you too Stefan. Friggin' _dick_.

Tossing the piece of paper to the ground in a fit of anger, I pulled out my phone and texted: _LOL u made funny, u did da thing, u r hilarious omg please quote lord of the rings again so hilariouss! ! ! ! ! ! sO FUNNYY! ! ! !_

But I guess if anything could accurately portray mine and Stefan's relationship, it would be a trapped dwarf and a hoard of Goblins wrecking his entire life. Okay, so that made me feel a smidge better. But shit, how the hell did they sneak out? And why?

We were in the middle of an episode!

God. Damn.

It took about five minutes to realize I was completely alone in the house.

So, clearly, I did what every teenager does while home alone.

I sprawled out on the floor and took selfies of myself with my camera on a black and white setting to make it more dramatic and _artistic_. Poe even started posing next to me (this bird was smart as hell). I angled myself so half my body was sprawled across the steps, like I was dead, the camera on a timer a few feet away.

That's when the front door tore open and Jeremy stomped in, nearly tripping over my body.

"Jesus fuck, Clare!" He snarled angrily, staring down at me as he hopped backwards, narrowly missing my face with his foot. That would've hurt. "What the hell are you doing on the floor?"

Someone was in a pissy mood. Jeez.

"I'm dead." He totally ruined the picture, too. Jeremy threw his hood up, stepping over me.

"Be dead somewhere else!" He bit out, sulking up the steps, and I propped myself on my elbows, staring after him.

"Whaaat's wrong?" I wondered, frowning. Jeremy hadn't been in this kind of mood in a while, and I was surprised by how it instantly dampened _my_ mood.

"Nothing! I'm _fine_!"

What a little liar. "Is it Vic—"

"Just drop it, Clare! Get off my back! I said I'm fine!" He snapped, slamming the door shut to his room. _Teenagers_. I had a feeling going into his room and offering a warm compress for his ovaries would probably have something thrown at me.

I slid my gaze toward Poe. "Fetch Damon," I instructed happily, grabbing my camera as I pulled myself up. Poe squawked, hopping to the front door, which I opened for him. "Fly my pretty, fly!"

I'm a comedian God.

I settled for lounging on the floor of my room while waiting for Damon. After what felt like seconds, I found myself staring up at my dark haired vampire who was now standing over me, staring back down at me, his head cocked to the side. Like he wasn't sure what to make of me. Despite having cuddled up to him last night, a rush of excited glee sprinted through me at the sight of him and my lips slid into a relaxed, happy, smile. I never realized I was missing him until he was in front of me, making my entire being flutter.

"Hi."

He rolled his eyes.

"You didn't have to send the crow, you could have texted," Damon said casually, like I didn't realize that was an option.

Pfft.

"I don't know where my phone is," it wasn't in my hand, which meant it was lost forever.

"Mmm," Damon was onto me and squinted his pretty blue eyes. "Well, here I am, forever at your beck and call. What do you want, _princess_?"

"Jeremy's in a bad mood." Which meant it was my job to fix all his problems.

"Clary, I'm _busy_," Damon sighed, scooping me up off the floor. My heart bounced, his warm hands sending sparks of glee through me. "_I'm_ not in the _mood_ to play therapist. If he wants to talk, he will."

I grinned at him, sheepishly, and Damon's gaze slid into mine. "He's not going to _want_ to talk, he's going to let himself rot in misery. I think it's about Vicki." It was both surprising and unsurprising when Damon's blue gaze softened slightly. I knew he and Jeremy had somehow gotten closer, and that painful love triangles was their _thing _that they shared in common. "I just need you to do a tiny little favor and you can be on your vampire dickery way. I swear."

It was becoming increasingly difficult to think clearly with Damon's thumb lightly drawing circles on my skin, my heart twirling to his touch. "What do you need?" His voice was as soft as his feather light caress, blue eyes drifting across my face.

"Pot."

Damon stared at me, as though unsure if he heard me correctly. "Pot?" He repeated, eyebrows slowly raising. I bobbed my head with a happy grin.

"Yep. I'll get him really stoned, he'll have _no choice_ but to blab what's bothering him. And then I can fix it." It was genius. _I _was a genius.

Damon didn't look convinced. Annoyance flickered across his expression. "You had a crow _bug the shit_ out of me, fetching me like a _dog_, just so you could ask me to get you _pot_?" Why was this surprising? It's like Damon didn't even _know_ me. "I was under the impression you didn't want Jeremy smoking that crap anymore."

"Well, no, that's all Elena and Jenna." My lips tugged into a frown. "There's nothing _wrong _with smoking pot, as long as you can keep your shit together. I just stopped approving of _Vicki_." My grin returned. "Besides, I'm going to get stoned _with _him. Sibling bonding."

Damon stared at me, his eyebrows furrowed, his expression loudly questioning why he associated with me. This was quickly followed by a horrible realization and understanding that he was _trapped _with me due to the _romantic feels. Ha _ha.

"Of all the things _you_ should never do, it's getting stoned." Damon tilted his head, a look of consideration sweeping across his face. "_Without me_."

I'm not sure where Damon went to get the drugs, but he left and was back within five minutes. I guess he _knew a guy_. Or maybe there were drugs at his house. I wouldn't put it past Stefan to be a stoner. He needed something to dull the murderous cravings that ran rampant inside him every day. Damon insisted we get high together _first_, so he can see what kind of 'high' I'd have. So much for him being _busy_.

Damon was sitting across me, leaning against the bed, and I was just… God, I just felt so calm. Lazy. Completely at peace with my inner self. Like for the first time in my life, I felt at one with the universe. I could sit here, in my room, forever. A fuzzy, warm, haze of nothingness blanketed my mind and I was fairly certain I was weightless. Now that I have achieved inner peace, nothing could tie me down.

"I'm—holy shit, Claryberry, I'm in a TV show." Damon suddenly burst out laughing and I smiled lazily, living off the sound of his glee. "You're dating a character in a TV show. You're dating a fictional character! _HA_!"

"We are all someone's fictional characters." I murmured knowingly. "There are so many universes out there. Just complied onto each other. Somewhere, Harry Potter lives." I wanted to visit that universe. I probably could. If I could jump into this body, I was certain I could jump into Harry Potter's body. I would then prank the hell out of Snape. "Maybe we're _all _Snape…"

Damon's lips sprang upward into a haughty smirk and I was struck by how attractive he was. "I only want _you _to be my fan." He flounced to his feet, easily sweeping me upward and into him. "I only want you to want me," he continued brightly, leaning his face closer to mine. So easily I found myself becoming caught up in his endlessly blue eyes. Everything about his beauty seemed so _heightened_. I just wanted to touch him.

"You're so pretty, D." I slid my fingers across his face, admiring the way his skin felt against mine, admiring every little detail about his devastatingly beautiful face. "You make me wish I knew how to draw. I want to draw you."

"How do you want me? Fang off or fang _on_?" Damon teased playfully, flashing a devilishly handsome fanged grin. I marveled over how the sight of his pearly pointed whites made my heart pitter patter.

"I love your fangs," I sighed happily, smiling lazily. Damon grinned widely at me.

"My fangs are _so hard _for you." He announced gleefully, grabbing my thighs and hoisting me upward. To make it all easier on myself, I wrapped my legs around his waist, feeling very content. I was like a sloth. Clinging to Damon who would act as my tree. My tree of life. He kissed me happily on the mouth. "Hi-Yo Silver! _Awaaaay_!" He cheered.

And then we were suddenly in Jeremy's room, for whom I felt an overwhelming rush of affectionate for. Because he was my _brother_. My actual brother. Jeremy, the poor moody teenager, was sitting on his bed, game controller in hand. He turned to give us an annoyed look, pushing his headset down.

"Draw me like one of your French girls, Jerbear!" Damon demanded giddily.

"Get out."

He loved us.

I found myself being thrown rather carelessly to the ground which tugged a few amused giggles out of me. I rolled across the floor, feeling the universe move with me, as Damon leapt at my poor, poor brother, tackling him the bed.

"'_Mon! Ge'off!_" Jeremy demanded unhappily, voice muffled, as my extremely affectionate vampire smothered him with some lovin'.

"Don't be upset, Jeremy!" Damon cried passionately, grabbing Jeremy's face between his fingers and running his tongue up the side of his head. My giggles morphed into pleased laughter.

"What the fuck?!"

"I'm marking you! We're in a pack! We're wolves! Wolf pack!" Damon grinned widely and I wandered over to the bed, rolling over to Damon and Jeremy.

"I'd like to be in the wolf pack. You _are_ my wolf pack, the ones I can call my own." It seemed so obvious now and Damon rolled off of Jeremy, who immediately scrambled far from us, snatching me up.

"You are my Alpha Queen," Damon stated, nuzzling his face against mine. "I will gladly submit to your will! Everything you want is yours!" He grabbed my face between his hands and sloppily ran his tongue up the front of my face. I smiled at him happily.

"What the… Wolf pack? You're a _vampire_! Not a werewolf! There is no wolf pack!" Jeremy's negativity was off the charts, his vibe was going to kill mine if he didn't get past this darkness that he was creating.

"J-Bird, be calm. Be at peace." I cooed, leaning closer to him. He furrowed his eyebrows at me.

"Alpha Wolf demands to be king of the bed," Damon interrupted with a cackle, shoving me into Jeremy, who flailed backwards.

Hitting the ground was a metaphor, because no matter how many times it happened, I would always rise above. I tilted my eyes toward the ceiling and raised my hands.

"We should get glow in the dark stars," I murmured thoughtfully, waving my hands back and forth. Swaying them. Like blades of grass in the wind. "Do you think that maybe we're all blades of grass, just swaying in the wind? Waiting to be mowed down due to society's pressures and false ideals of what is presentable and acceptable?"

"Holy shit, C, you're _high_," realization dawned through Jeremy. "You're… _both _high! Can vampires even get high?"

"Mmmhmm. Damon lived through the 70's. Between cross dressing and killing sprees, I'm sure he was tripping out."

Damon rolled over to the edge of the bed, staring down at us, veiny eyed and fangs on full display. "Hey kids, wanna buy some drugs from your friendly neighborhood vampire?"

* * *

"Romeo and Juliet is a parody and a giant middle finger to teenage love." Jeremy said suddenly, his words rolling through me, and I knew them to be the absolute truth. "Shakespeare was an asshole."

We were currently playing Mario Kart on the Wii and I was certain that I had the ability to see through the illusions of time and space. I was the master of the rainbow bridge.

"Holy shit," Damon said, mind blown. "Suddenly it all makes sense."

"Mmhm, you should write a book about it." I agreed pleasantly. "Everyone writes books about that kind of stuff these days. It's Earth shattering, and so obvious now." Jeremy had overcome the illusion of reality.

I wondered why people were so against smoking pot. The universe opened up and truth was discovered.

"I mean, you're old as balls, D-Man," Jeremy continued and Damon burst into hysterical giggles. "Is it true? Was Shakespeare an asshole?"

"Pffft, totally. Like, listen, Jerbear, just—listen." Damon leaned against Jeremy, sniggering. "He used to give geeks like _you_ wedgies. True story. Swear to God. We went to High School together. I called him W.S.-Peare."

I ran Damon off the rainbow bridge with a turtle, but I doubted he noticed as his arms were now wrapped around Jeremy's shoulders, nuzzling into him.

"Me the geek?" Jeremy didn't seem to notice. Or maybe perhaps Damon's affectionate behavior was simply the way it was always meant to be and Jeremy's inner self recognized this. "Did you see the way he was dressed? _He _was the geek. Like into drama and musicals and shit…" Jeremy snorted as I thought about the age differences between Damon and Shakespeare. "Shit, he was a Gleek."

"That would mean he would've been in the same grade for two hundred and seventy-six years." I watched as the rainbow bridge defeated me. My tiny video game chosen self fell. Like Loki.

"Uh yeah, 'cause he was a douchebag." Damon shrugged, grinning at me happily. "I already explained that."

"Did you just math?" Jeremy wondered, awestruck. "Like in your head?"

"When I'm high, it's easier to math. Because I can see into the ultimate void of wisdom and knowledge. I can math it up inside my mind."

* * *

"And she's like 'are you on drugs' and it's like I'm not even on drugs at this point," Jeremy was saying, annoyed and upset. We needed to get his groove back.

"J, we _are _the drugs," I corrected him, feeling a deep understanding for my little brother suddenly.

"We really are," Damon agreed, nodding sagely. "People use us to feel better."

"Wow." Jeremy seemed to feel better and I smiled at him. "This just turned deep. Okay, I'm going to make a movie. Like the idea just came to me. It's going to be called Batman's Back. Like… people will wonder if I mean Batman's back as in Bane breaking it, or as in Batman's back, as in he's returned. But the description will be a question mark. So when people go see it, it'll actually be about a bat _man _who has a deformed back. Like it fucking looks like he has bat wings."

That was actually really impressive. I could visually see this movie, too.

"I would so go see that. That's a good fucking idea." Damon stated seriously. "We'll go out and fucking like… compel fucking Spielberg. It'll be epic."

* * *

Centuries could come and go, and I would forever be content with merely sitting here, with Damon's head in my lap. I lightly ran my fingers through his silky black locks, loving the way his hair felt.

"We have these threads between us," Damon murmured passionately, his blue eyes locked on my face as he gazed up at me. "That nobody else contributes to or that nobody else can admire, and they are made of gold. Gold threads strung between us. We're connected. And they represent our moments. Our best moments. Which is all of them, so I guess it's a tapestry now."

A tiny smile bloomed across my face. I adored Damon, I adored everything about him. "I said this to J, and I'll say it to you, too. I'll be here for your brightest moments, and I'll be here for your darkest moments. We'll have terrible moments, but it's okay, because it'll just add pretty colors to our tapestry."

His blue eyes brightened and I decided his gaze was like the sea I loved so much. "I _love _the way you like me, Clary," he murmured softly, raising hand, tracing the tips of his fingers across my cheek. I leaned into his touch. "I don't think you'll ever really understand what it _does _to me. The way you look at me… how you've _always_ looked at me, what you say to me… You make me feel like I actually deserve you, like I _deserve _all of this. I want to spend decades admiring every inch of your body."

Damon was soft and vividly consuming all at once, just like his touch. It could bring such a calm over me, yet make my insides beat and twirl spastically. I gently took his hand in mine, playing with his long fingers. He made me feel inspired.

"Had we but world enough, and time, this coyness, lady, were no crime. We would sit down and think which way to walk, and pass our long love's day." I recited softly, unable to help myself. I'm pretty sure he just quoted _To His Coy Mistress _at me anyway and now I couldn't get the poem out of my head. "I would love you ten years before the Flood; and you should, if you please, refuse, 'til the conversion of the Jews. My vegetable love should grow vaster than empires, and more slow. A hundred years should go to praise thine eyes, and on thy forehead gaze, two hundred to adore each breast, but thirty thousand to the rest. An age at least to every part, and the last age should show your heart. For, lady, you deserve this state, nor would I love at lower rate."

Damon lazily flicked his wrist to the hand I had been playing with, easily pulling me to him. I made a humming noise of delight, nestling next to him. "If you spout poetry while high I'm throwing you out a window."

I wondered what it'd be like to experience something life threatening while high. I wondered what sort of realizations would come to me. With a smile, I snuggled closer to him. I swear, it was like every inch of me knew every inch of him, and reacted accordingly.

"It's my favorite poem."

"You _hate _poetry," Damon reminded me cheerfully, tilting his head so he could look at me with his beautiful, half-lidded, blue eyes. I squashed his cheeks with my hands. God, everything about Damon just set my entire state of being into overdrive. I couldn't stop touching him. He swatted my hands away. "Passionately. You've told me at least three different times how much it makes you _ragequit _life."

"This poem is about not being prude." I murmured happily, tapping his nose with the tip of my finger. "And that is why it's my favorite."

Damon snorted with laugher. "Reaaaally? Which part? The one where the guy is like, promising to love this woman for all eternity and beyond? Or the part where he promises to eye her tits for a few decades?"

"The second verse, which is my favorite." I said with a grin, amused. "But at my back I always hear time's winged chariot hurrying near. And yonder all before us lie, deserts of vast eternity. Thy beauty shall no more be found, nor, in thy marble vault shall sound, my echoing song, then worms shall try, that long preserv'd virginity. And your quaint honor turn to dust, and into ashes all my lust. The grave's a fine and private place, but none I think do there embrace. It's brilliant. This is like the biggest asshole poem I've ever heard. Like, I'd totally love you five-ever and spend thousands of years to admire every different body part, but since that's not the case, stop being such a stuck up bitch and sleep with me."

Damon slid his fingers over my lips and I playfully nibbled at the tips, grinning at him. Silly vampire. He was acting like I was going on a rant. I wasn't. Not even. I just had an endless amount of feelings for this poem suddenly. It was the only poem that I ever liked, and I wanted to just spend forever discussing every perfect asshole line. It was the poem of all poems. It was poem dickery.

"I wasn't talking about poetry, Clarissa, I was talking about being crazy about you." Damon murmured quietly, his fingertips slowly grazing across my bottom lip. Nothing but Damon existed and his mouth sprang into a smirk. He bent his head closer to mine. "Because I'm a _good _old-fashioned loverboy."

He kissed the corner of my mouth sweetly, his fingertips gliding, feather light, over my chin and down the curve of my throat as he trailed his mouth, achingly slowly, across my face. My heart hummed as Damon overwhelmed every single sense in my body. I wondered if it was because of my altered state of being due to being high or if it was just because it was _Damon_. It didn't matter. I didn't want him to ever stop touching me.

"_Ooooh_, let me feel your heartbeat," he sang in a low, intoxicating, murmur, his fingers stroking where my sputtering pulse met skin. "_Grow faster, faster_…" His soft, playful, voice danced across me as he lightly brushed his mouth right below my ear. I was melting into him, completely at his mercy, completely _his_, as his warm palm skating across my skin. "I'd like for you and I to go _romancing_. Say the word—your wish is my command!"

I never thought I'd be completely wooed because I was being sung to, and I realized I was itching to dance my fingers across the keys of a piano. Damon was suddenly hovering over me, blue eyes glowing with bright, wicked, delight that made every part of me grow warm with hazy desire. I slid my fingers through his hair, curling at the nape of his neck, and pulled his face to mine, kissing him.

"Can you guys not hook up here?" Jeremy's voice cut through, in a whine, having returned from wherever it was that he had gone off too. It literally felt like years. "I don't care if you're a vampire, I'll kick your ass. That's my sister."

Damon bounced to his feet with a cackle, springing in front of Jeremy and tugging him close. "When I'm not with you, I think of you always!" Damon sang passionately, a charming smile on his devilishly handsome face. He waltzed Jeremy about. "When I'm not with you, think of me alwaaaaays!"

* * *

"I'm hungry." I patted my empty stomach.

"Let's make brownies!" Damon gushed and I smiled lazily. I was pretty sure I had been thinking about that. We were definitely on the same wavelength.

"Yeah, let's make pot brownies." Jeremy agreed happily. "Maybe we can get Aunt Jenna and Elena to join the party."

Damon dissolved into very evil like cackling.

* * *

"I dunno, I just feel like you were alive during the craziest drugged out time in history," Jeremy complained, leaning against me, as I searched Youtube for how to make pot brownies. "So, like, you should know this shit, Damon. What is wrong with you?"

"Obvs, little man, I was way too strung out on human blood and LSD to get myself invited into someone's house to make brownies," Damon cackled, stroking my neck tenderly. "Hurry up, my little love muffin. I'm starving!"

Youtube was officially my favorite place. It was genius, bringing the whole world together, as one collective being. "I feel like we're the Geth. We are Legion."

A legion of stoned humans all seeking How-To guides on Youtube.

"It's a shame that Stefan doesn't have a Facebook," I murmured as I spotted what I was sure was an adorably hilarious cat video. "I'd leave him cat videos on his wall. Forever."

* * *

"No, no, no, make the profile picture…" Damon began childishly, but I was completely synced with him that I knew he was about to push me out of the chair. I had found a heightened self-awareness and let him have the computer chair before he could do so. "This one. This is perfect."

"I think it needs more cat," Jeremy said between a fit of laughter as I calmly peered down at the screen, to the picture of Stefan with drawn on cat whiskers. "Let me just photoshop the ears in before you upload it."

"We have to friend everybody from your school," Damon gushed, bouncing in his seat, refusing to move. Jeremy sighed and leaned across him awkwardly. "Especially the people he doesn't talk to. Which is everyone! We have to leave them cat things on their walls! But we can never tell him about the Facebook! He'll forever be confused!"

"How'd this cat thing start?" Jeremy wondered.

"Mmm, Stefan once told me Damon was used to stripping so I, to be a brat, replied it was because Damon had to support his addiction. So Stefan said 'you have to be kitten me', and told me he had a serious addiction to cat videos."

Damon and Jeremy stared at me for a good century and a half before they erupted into uncontrollable laughter.

* * *

"Shush," Damon smacked my hand down, causing me to lose the grip on the egg. It splattered to the ground, causing Jeremy to burst into giggles.

"You just killed Humpty Dumpty!" Jeremy cried, clutching his stomach with laughter. "You're a murderer!"

"_Duh_." Damon rolled his eyes as he shooed Jeremy away from the bowl. "I'm the only one who can cook. These brownies have to be perfect."

"You're doing it wrong, you didn't even watch the video." Jeremy argued. "We have to put it in the butter."

"That's stupid." Damon dismissed with a flourish wave of his hand. "We'll just put it in the bowl. It'll be fine."

I was so unbelievably entertained. I merely sat on the island, watching the two bicker.

"We're melting it into the butter like the video said, otherwise what is the point?" Jeremy attempted to grab the crushed up pot but Damon smacked it out of his hand. It went soaring across the kitchen.

"Those kids were high, I'm not following the direction of a bunch of potheads." Damon refused as Jeremy frowned.

"But _we _are high and have no idea how to make pot brownies!" Jeremy smacked the bag of brownie mix from Damon's hands causing the powder to spill all over the floor.

"I guess we're making the brownies on the floor, then!" Damon huffed, dumping the entire gallon of milk onto the floor. "Get to fucking mixing!"

"We should have a cooking show," I decided, entertained. "Deremy Makes Shit While High."

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS DOING!?"

I tilted my head, seeing Elena and Stefan standing in the archway, both staring at us. I smiled warmly, offering a little wave.

"Hey," I greeted. "Welcome to our cooking show."

"Elena! Stefan!" Damon cheered happily, flitting across the kitchen and throwing his arms around the two of them.

"Damon!" Elena cried, startled, as he picked her up and spun her. "Oh my God, put me down! Put me down!"

"I love you guys too! Group hug!" Jeremy cried, throwing himself at Damon and Elena. The three of them slammed into the ground and Stefan tilted his green eyes toward me, curiously, making no effort to help our fallen family.

"Hey, Stefan," I said as he wandered closer to me.

"You're very calm," Stefan noted as Elena shrieked.

"EW DAMON, WHAT THE _HELL_?"

I nodded. "I've come to peace with myself and the universe." Amusement flashed across his face as he grinned at me.

"Yeah?"

"Welcome to the wolf pack, Laney!" Jeremy cackled hysterically.

"Don't forget to mark Stefan, D," I reminded pleasantly and my vampire suddenly appeared in front of us with a wide grin. He threw Stefan into a head lock, licking his cheek.

"Uh. Thanks." Stefan groaned, wiggling away from my pretty vampire, wiping his face with his sleeve.

"You guys—you guys are high!" Elena said unhappily, scrambling to her feet and backing away from Jeremy. She furiously wiped her face, dark eyes flashing in my direction. "Oh my God, you too, Clare?"

"Drugs are a concept, I simply am." I informed her and Stefan snorted.

"Yep. She's high. High as a kite." Jeremy nodded proudly. "As a rocket."

"And I think it's gonna be a long, long, time, til touch down brings me round again," I sang to an infuriated Elena. Her vibes were killer. "To find I'm not the man they think I am at home." This song suddenly had such a deeper meaning to me. "Oh no, no, no, I'm a rocket man!"

"_Rooooocket maaaaaan_! Burning out his fuse up here alone!" Damon belted out passionately causing Jeremy to giggle hysterically.

"I—I can't believe this right now! I can't believe any of this!" Elena exploded. "What made you think any of this would be possibly be a good idea? Where did you even _get _the drugs?! You should've known better, Clare! I can't believe you would encourage Jeremy to start smoking again!"

"Be calm, Elena," I soothed. "It's all alright."

"It's an intervention!" Damon cackled. "Stop doing drugs, Jeremy!"

"Gee, okay." Jeremy said sarcastically with a laugh. "Thanks Damon. Real life changing."

"The point of an intervention—you… _No_! No!" Elena was sputtering, she was in deep with her negative feelings. "You can't do an intervention if you're all stoned!"

"But, Elena, we had to gain his trust and lure him in with the drugs," Damon explained happily.

"But then we decided to make brownies. It happens. There is no real plan to the universe, we just have to _be_."

* * *

Wednesday, October 6th.

Video Games & Logan

* * *

"I need a ride to the mall."

I paused in my typing, tilting my head up toward Jeremy who was hovering over me. "I don't drive anymore," I said with a shrug, turning back to the laptop. "Sorry."

I was determined to see if I could figure out what the gray swirling around in my ring meant—what sort of horrid supernatural being it belonged to. Which led me to color meaning websites. I was now on some new age spiritual Wiccan blog.

"What do you mean you don't drive anymore?" Jeremy asked and I snorted. _Red is always connected to sex, blood, birth and death._ Yeah that sounded like Damon alright.

"I dunno, I just don't want to."

"But you like driving." Jeremy pointed out. _The color white projects purity, cleanliness, and neutrality. It is a balance of all colors._ Hmmm, that made sense, if white was humans. Untainted beings, the balance.

I guess.

Maybe.

"I used to, but I dunno, I just don't think it's a good idea." _Yellow stimulates nervous system and intellect. Joy, optimism, cheer, creativity._ Okaaaay.

"Did you ever drive Damon anywhere?" Jeremy wondered suddenly and I nodded, scrolling down the page a little. "And after you drove him, did you suddenly not want to ever drive again?"

"Mmhm, sounds about right," I murmured distractedly as Jeremy released an annoyed sigh. _Silver represents cycles, rebirth, and reincarnation_.

"You're compelled, C." Jeremy announced like it would be a life changing event for me. "He's compelled you to never want to drive again."

"That sucks." I didn't really care. _Silver is a mineral that is said to mirror the soul and strengthen the connection between astral and physical bodies. During astral projection, the cord that keeps you connected to your physical body is said to be silver in color._

"It does suck! Are you going to let him control every aspect of your life? You don't even care, because he's _made _you not care!" Jeremy continued as I sat back, frowning at the computer screen. This only made me feel more confused.

_Silver signifies: Purity, the moon, treasure, values, female energy, the unconscious mind._ Really helpful. This might've been the fourth website I've come across, and silver/gray always came back to the same few key words: female energy and the moon.

"You just want a ride to the mall," I lifted my gaze to meet Jeremy's. "That's the only reason you're pulling an Elena."

"Where's Damon?" Jeremy didn't even try to deny it. I shrugged my shoulders. "You don't know where he is? Doesn't that bother you?"

"Nope," I popped the p loudly. "He's off doing something terrible. As long as he's not having too much fun without me I don't care."

"You have to be the most laid back girlfriend ever." Jeremy sighed, sitting down at the table next to me.

"We're not dating yet, that's why I don't care. The moment I call myself _girlfriend _I'll demand to know his whereabouts constantly." I teased, grinning. "When you think of the color silver, what comes to mind?"

"Werewolves." Jeremy snatched the laptop, sliding it in front of him. Hmmm. "Well, I can't get Elena to drive me, she's still pissed about us getting high. And I can't get ahold of Damon. _You _can't drive. What do you think the chances of Stefan driving me are?"

"What do you need at the mall?" Werewolves would make sense, I guess. Silver was a wolf-y color. But that seemed… way too obvious. And I was curious about this _astral projection_ thing—what if I had been wrong? What if silver wasn't James? What if it was whatever it was that was following me?

"I want to preorder _Uncharted 2_, it comes out next week."

I stared at Jeremy.

He stared back.

"We have to get to the mall immediately." I agreed, flipping my phone open and set it between us on the table, putting it on speaker. The rings crinkled nosily.

"That's what I've been saying! This is seriously important!"

"_What's seriously important?_" Damon's voice crinkled through the speakers.

"Uncharted!" Jeremy huffed, throwing his hands up.

"_What's uncharted?_"

"A video game!"

"_I don't care_."

Damon was sassy today.

"Uncompel my sister!" Jeremy demanded. "She has to drive! It's an emergency!"

"_No_."

The call immediately ended and I huffed. "He hung up on us!"

"That asshole! Call Stefan!"

I grinned. "Okay."

Stefan picked up on the second ring. These vampires were whipped.

"_Hello_?"

"Stefan, thank God you picked up," I said seriously. "Jeremy and I need you." Jeremy's mouth twitched.

"_Are you guys okay?_" Stefan's voice tilted toward concerned. What a sucker.

"No," I stated seriously. "Everything is not okay. We're in trouble."

"_Where are you?_"

"Home."

"_Hold on_." Stefan hung up and Jeremy and I immediately burst into laughter.

"It can't be that terrible if you two are laughing," Stefan's voice cut between us and I shrieked in surprise, nearly falling out of the chair. I snapped my head toward the entrance of the kitchen where Stefan stood, his eyebrows raised.

Jesus. He got here fast.

"Compel my sister to want to drive again," Jeremy requested and I frowned.

"I don't want to want to drive again, though." Why wasn't he getting that? I was happy with this. I never wanted to drive again. _Ever_. Jeremy rolled his eyes.

"That's because you're compelled, C. Keep up."

Rude.

"Have you _seen _the way your sister drives?" Stefan wondered with a frown. "I'm not going to let that loose on the road again."

"Are you calling me a 'that'?" What the hell, Stefan?

"Fine," Jeremy sighed. "Can you drive us then?"

"Elena still hasn't forgiven me for me withholding the fact that she looks like Katherine," Stefan shook his head. "I'd rather watch Twilight again then piss her off by driving you anywhere. Sorry."

Way to be that guy, Stefan. Way to be _that guy_. Jeremy rejected the idea of asking Tyler for a ride, Matt was busy, Bonnie was with Elena, Caroline was unreachable and Jenna was in class.

It left me with the most obvious option.

"_Logan Fell_."

Ugh. Why do people answer the phone with their name? Jeremy and I exchanged annoyed glances.

"Hello, Logan," I purred warmly, drumming my fingertips against the table.

"…_Who is this?_"

I was offended that he didn't know.

"Have so many women calling your phone you can't keep track of them all?" I wondered sarcastically and his amused laughter trickled through.

"_Hello, Clare. How may I help you?_"

"Nice deflection, dickweed." I bit out and Jeremy swatted my arm, giving me a pointed look, as Logan laughed again.

"_You'll warm up to me eventually_."

No I wouldn't. "Since you're free to answer your phone, I need a favor."

"_Mmm. Will you start being nicer to me?_"

No.

"I'll consider considering it."

"_The similarities between you and Jenna astound me._" Logan tried to make it seem like he was saying this fondly. Loser.

"Trying to move onto a younger version of her? I'm unsurprised, Logan."

He laughed his charming stupid laugh. "_I'm never going to catch any breaks with you, am I?_"

"With the amount of things you catch from other women, you should be relieved you're not getting shit from me."

Jeremy and I high-fived as Logan laughed. _Again_.

Like the little bitch he was.

"_What can I help you with, Clare?_"

"Jeremy and I need a ride to the mall."

There was a pause. "_Okay. I can be there in fifteen._"

"Thaaank you, Logan." I snapped my phone shut and Jeremy shook his head.

"What a vagina wig."

* * *

Boring. Who cares. Lame. Ugly graphics. Stupid name.

Idly, I picked through video game cases in the corner of Gamestop. I wasn't much of a player, and I picked out games like I picked out books. By the title and how pretty the cover looked. I was fickle and shallow.

"This looks pretty violent," Logan commented on casually, some Call of Duty game in hand. "I've been thinking about doing a piece on video games and how they effect the minds of children and teens."

"Logan," I sighed, refusing to look at the idiot standing next to me. "If video games effected mindsets, your entire generation would be running around in dark rooms eating magical fruit."

"Mmm. Sounds like raves." Logan countered, wiggling the video game. I turned to give him an unimpressed stare. "You don't believe a child playing a war game will grow up with a wrapped sense of reality? Or become desensitized to violence?"

"_That _game is rated M for a reason. I also believe it's in the parents rights to raise their children as seen fit, not some reporter who has the ability to sway misinformed adults." I shot back. "Violence and death will always be a part of society. Crime is thirty four point three percent lower since video games have become a part of the norm in households," I was making up the percentage, but I doubted Logan knew that. "Video games _are _a creative outlet, it's been proven that you're able to make faster decisions, and video games have been proven to keep the mind sharp. There's a ninety year old woman who plays video games every day, and she's got the mind of a forty year old. The kids who go out and shoot up schools? Movie theaters? They're unwell. And they've been doing that long before video games. Books have been banned from schools, because supposedly it caused a kid to go out and shoot someone. You wanna discuss this with me? Go and find me proof that video games are damaging and we'll have a proper debate."

Logan smile was all charm and blinding white teeth. "You should be a lawyer."

Oh jeez. I rolled my eyes, knocking the video game out of his hand. Adults loved to say that when presented with a half-assed argument that topped theirs. "Already got my mind set on stripping."

I pranced away, leaving Logan to awkwardly think about his life choices, and made my way toward Jeremy. I had promised myself I wouldn't interfere, as he had struck up a conversation with a pretty dark haired chick that looked his age and totally his type (she was geeky). But I was bored. And Logan was gross.

"Heyo!" I greeted happily, turning their attention from me. The girl had been clearly trying to flirt and Jeremy appeared friggin' oblivious. "I'm Clare."

"My very weird and annoying sister," Jeremy corrected, rolling his eyes playfully.

"Cool. I'm Anna." The girl introduced with a small wave, the massive amounts of bracelets on her wrist clanking. "I was just informing Jeremy that he was going to make a terrible mistake he'd regret for all _eternity_. To not pre-order Borderlands is a sin."

I gasped, as if it were the most revolting, scandalous, gossip I'd ever heard. "_Jeremy_!"

He rose his hands in defense. "I only have money to buy one game! _And _I was reading in GameInformer that I'd be better off playing it with someone else. The guys I usually play with have some… I don't know, weird shit going on and haven't been online as much."

I squinted my eyes thoughtfully. "You mean that kid who is like addicted to Adderall? He wouldn't even be able to sit around long enough to get invested in a game like Borderlands. It's like a game-gasm between Oblivion and Fallout." I eyed Anna curiously. Time to get Jeremy a girlfriend! "What about you? What game system are you gonna play it on?"

"The PS3," Anna said with a small smirk, turning her pretty dark eyes to Jeremy. "Come on, get the game. I just moved here and I literally have no friends. We can play it _together_." She clasped her hands together, grinning _adorably_. "C'mooooon, Jeremy, say _yes_!"

"I don't know…" Jeremy why the hell are you resisting? Pretty geeky girl wants to play video games with you!

"Don't worry Anna-banana! He'll get the game. We've got a Vagina Wig!" I assured her happily. Not waiting for their response, I flounced back over to Logan. It was time for him to become useful and buy us shit!

* * *

Friday, October 8th

New Gym Teachers & Dates

* * *

With a huff, I slammed my locker shut and turned to an annoyed Bonnie. "Where the hell has Care been? I haven't seen her all day—I mean, she arrived to class after me, but between classes, nothing! It's like she doesn't freakin' exist!"

Bonnie sighed irritably, linking arms with me and leading me down the hall. "_Apparently_ she has to meet James at his locker after each class," she said dryly and I threw her an incredulous look.

"Um, okay?" What the _hell_? Was she kidding me? "Since when did _Care _turn into his personal little puppy?" This wasn't my Caroline. She ran on nobody's schedule but her _own_.

"I don't know, but it's really starting to piss me off. Like, okay, whatever, I get it. She likes him. She doesn't have to act like she's obsessively infatuated! She acts like she only lives to do what _he _wants!"

"We should just confront her." I said after a moment. "Drag her away. It's not the end of the world if she actually spends some time with _us_."

We found my blonde bestie anxiously waiting by James' locker, but the asshole was nowhere to be seen.

"Hey," I greeted, trying to shove down my irritation. "Let's head to gym."

"You guys go ahead," Caroline said dismissively, with a wave of her hand. "I said I'd wait for James."

"Care, the warning bell went off like a second ago, and he doesn't even have gym." Bonnie pointed out. "He'll understand that you had to get to class."

"Just go!" Caroline insisted, giving us an irritated smile. "It's fine. He said to wait here, so I'm waiting here. Okay?" Bonnie and I exchanged glances. "Um, standing right here, kay? So don't look at each other like I'm crazy. _Rude_."

"Since when did you act like his little love sick puppy?" Bonnie demanded. "You're centering your whole life around this guy!"

"Oh my gosh, Bon, I'm just waiting for him at his locker!" Caroline snapped back. "Wow. Sorry you're unable to relate, little Miss Sad and Single!"

_Whoa_! Not good! Bonnie scoffed. "Excuse you, I'm not _sad_. And I'd rather be single than exist to follow some guy's rules!"

"Care, we'll see you in gym," I cut in before Caroline could open her mouth, tugging an angry Bonnie's arm, leading her away. The last thing I needed was for there to be an unnecessary fight.

"Who the hell does she think she is?" Bonnie fumed. "How dare she say that to me?"

"It was a deflection," I mused thoughtfully, though I knew Bonnie would much rather bitch about Caroline then figure out what the hell that was about. "She redirected the conversation, she knows where to strike."

"Yeah because she's a _bitch_." Bonnie scoffed moodily. "I can't believe she said that to me."

"You _did _attack her first."

"Clare! Can you not play freakin' Dr. Phil for like five seconds? You're the one who said we should confront her!" Bonnie stressed, clearly feeling a little betrayed.

I raised my hands in defense, opening my mouth, when I caught sight of the gray swirling around in my ring. I blinked, tilting my gaze around the hall—only I didn't see James anywhere. I had been so _sure_… Tyler's dark eyes met mine briefly and he gave that stupid guy nod. My gaze fell down to my ring.

Tyler was causing the color? He and Matt had been the only other constants when the color was around… and Matt currently wasn't anywhere in sight. What the hell did that mean? What was _Tyler_? Or had this all been a coincidence? And whatever was following me was trying to make me think the color represented someone else?

"Hey, Caroline is still M.I.A?" Elena's voice fluttered in curiously and Bonnie threw her hands up, stomping into the locker room. My twin tilted her gaze in my direction, the teasing gone from her expression. "What's going on?" She nodded her head toward the ring on my finger and I took a moment to appreciate her clever mind.

Knowing to use Caroline to cause Bonnie to storm off so we could talk supernatural. Devious, clever, twin.

"Dunno, apparently Tyler is the silver that keeps showing up." I murmured with a half shrug. "Or whatever follows us is trying to make it appear that way." There were too many possibilities at this point.

I still wanted to believe James was an evil soul-eating troll.

When Caroline walked into the locker room, it was clear that, as her BFF, I would be obviously choosing to stand with her while Elena stayed with Bonnie. Bonnie and Caroline were both loudly ignoring each other and I was horribly amused.

Jeremy:_ its literally no surprise that there is somethin wron wit tylr i could have told yu that_

Really helpful, Jeremy. With a sigh, I threw my phone back into my bag and shoved it into the gym locker.

* * *

"But supposedly he's really hot," Caroline's voice snapped me from my thoughts as we exited the school, making our way to the track.

"Hm? Who?"

"You have a boyfriend, so what do you care?" Bonnie wondered snidely at Caroline who flipped her hair over her shoulder.

"The new substitute football coach slash gym teacher. He's, like, basically volunteering until they find a suitable replacement." Caroline informed me pleasantly, a fake smile plastered on her face, as she ignored Bonnie. "I hear he's pretty close to our age, too, so push the girls out a bit, Clare," she instructed, straightening her back. "I'm sure if we just bounce a bit, it'll be an easy A."

"Mmm, I love the way you think, Caroline. An A_ Plus-Plus_ for _you_."

I tripped over my own damn feet at the sound of Damon's lazy drawl, flailing as I landed flat on my face. I didn't care if it hurt. I was never getting up again. I wanted to die here.

"_Damon_?" Elena questioned as Caroline and Bonnie fought over trying to help me back to my feet. Oh my God, why is this happening? "What are you doing here?"

"That's Mr. Salvatore to you, Miss Gilbert."

No.

Nope.

Oh my God.

Not happening.

It couldn't be happening.

I hit my head and now I'm hallucinating.

"I see your sister has already fallen for me. I must be doing something right in life." Damon continued happily and I lifted my head, my heartbeat quickening spastically at the sight of him. He was smirking down at me, blue eyes gleaming wickedly. _What the shit?!_

"You're the new gym teacher?" Caroline asked, yanking me to my feet as Bonnie swatted at my gym clothes, brushing the dirt off. I just gaped, completely in a state of numb, disbelieving, shock.

"Mmhm. I got _jealous_ of Stefan spending so much time with you fine ladies." Damon flashed her a charming, flirty, grin and I was pretty sure my heart just gave out. "Besides, your football team is in a desperate need for a coach. Not to brag, but I'm amazing. I taught Stefan everything he knows."

I opened my mouth, fumbling, my mind falling blank. Noises just came choking out instead. I pointed, disbelievingly, at Damon. Who was here. As my gym teacher. Damon.

_Damon_.

_Vampire_ Damon.

Damon, my sort of _boyfriend_.

_Gym teacher_.

_Sexy_ gym teacher.

A shriek of horror ripped from my throat as I continued to gawk, pointing at him in complete and utter disbelief. Just—what? No! Oh my God! DAMON WAS MY SEXY KIND OF BOYFRIEND VAMPIRE GYM TEACHER?!

WHAT IS MY LIFE?

What was this reality!?

"D-D-Damon!" I couldn't believe it! I didn't know if I wanted to pounce on him, scream, or throw myself to the ground in hopes I'd die. "_Damon_!"

Damon's smirk grew into a smug, haughty, one and all I was able to do was produce strangled shrieks. "_Clary_!" He mocked back.

"Yes, Clare," Caroline nodded, patting me on the head. "It's your boyfriend. Good job. You correctly identified him!"

"I think you broke her," Bonnie grinned, clearly amused and I gawked at her in horror. No! No, Bonnie, no! He'll make sexual things from that!

Damon laughed and it was like a jolt rushing through me at the sound. Holy fuck, why was I so affected by him?! "Not _yet_."

"Okay." Elena shook her head, snatching my hand that was still pointing at Damon, and lead me toward the track. "I don't want to hear any of that kind of talk."

"I can't believe it's _Damon_!" Caroline came to my other side, linking arms with me, as I just sort of just felt like some kind of victim. I was not going to survive. Damon was going to mentally destroy me. "Give him a blowjob so we don't actually have to do anything!"

My cheeks flooded with color instantly and I choked on air.

"Caroline!" Elena hissed, looking horrified.

"Oh my God," Bonnie burst into laughter, apparently now over being mad at Caroline.

"Whaaat?" My blonde _ex_-bestie said innocently. "She's dating him, we might as well all benefit from it!"

* * *

Following Elena out of the building, I sent a totally nonchalant, completely subtle, text message to Tyler about him possibly being a supernatural being. _Hey shithead you human or something fucked up?_

Totally subtle.

"Hey," Caroline appeared by my side and I grinned. "You guys going to stay after?"

"Why?" Elena frowned. "I don't cheer anymore, Care. You know that. There's no reason for us to stay for practice."

"Oh come on, it'll be just for fun! Plus Damon and Stefan will be there, doing football things." Caroline wiggled her eyebrows suggestively. "You can't tell me you don't want to prance around looking sexy while they're some feet away!"

Elena glanced at me and I shrugged. I was pretty sure I was okay now. Damon being my _gym teacher _had left me a little spastic some hours later, but I was certain I was finally accepting this fucked up reality that I now resided in.

"Okay." Elena nodded causing Caroline to squeal. "But Clare's not allowed to do any routines."

"Like I'd let her," Caroline rolled her eyes and I frowned back at them, offended.

That was a bit of a peeve of mine. I might've been a little spastic, but I wasn't clumsy nor was I a klutz.

Now they were both challenging me. I smiled at the both of them sweetly. How difficult could cheerleading be? Anything they could do, I could do _better_.

Caroline had an extra 'cheer practice' uniform, which consisted of black booty shorts and a tiny tank top. I wasn't even exaggerating about the shorts, they were seriously tiny as hell. I might as well just be wearing my underwear. And the tank top happened to be red, which she had to wrestle me into. She was wearing something similar and even forced a red ribbon into my hair. My happiness factor was diving straight into the ground. I didn't _like _red. Elena wouldn't keep her smug little grin off her face, either. She and Bonnie were dressed similarly but looked a hell of a lot more modest compared to me.

"I can't believe you're here," Bonnie said for the third time with a little giddy smile, bouncing on her heels as we made our way to the corner of the field, a fairly decent distance from the football players (where Caroline was currently, giving James a 'good luck' punch with her mouth on his). "It's not the same without you!"

"Well…" Elena lifted her hands, as though to say 'what can you do'. "Clare wanted to come, too, so…"

Bonnie crinkled her eyebrows at me and I stuck my tongue out. "Okaaaay, but… I think it'd be safer if she didn't, you know…"

"I _know_." I rolled my eyes at Bonnie's wary tone. Seriously, how hard could cheerleading possibly be?

"Clare," Tyler's slightly irritated voice caught my attention and I tilted my head as he jogged over to us, in his little football gear, dark eyes squinting at me. He slid his football helmet off. "Can I talk to you real quick?"

Tyler always wanted to talk to me _real quick_. "Sure." Elena and Bonnie both gave Tyler identical sassy looks with their eyebrows raised.

"We'll be right over there, Clare," Elena assured me (like if they walked away I would be totally lost) as Bonnie looked Tyler up and down. I wasn't really sure what the sass attack was for, but then I figured it was what girls _did_.

"Look, this team can't afford anymore fuck ups," Tyler said after waiting a few seconds, turning his gaze back to me. I had no idea what he was talking about. "I don't know how good of a coach your weird boyfriend is going to be," Tyler paused, as though waiting for me to deny my relationship with Damon or defend Damon's coaching abilities. I merely stared back at him. "But that doesn't matter. Just tell Caroline to knock it off with Hamilton, okay? We need his head in the game, and with his history with past girlfriends—we can't afford for anything else to go wrong."

I was guessing Hamilton was James' last name. Weird, I guess I was expecting it to be _Potter_. "What do you mean, his _history _with past girlfriends?" I asked, narrowing my eyes at his choice of words. What the hell did _that _mean? Did he become obsessed? One track minded?

Tyler raised his eyebrows and lifted his hands. "Hey—it's none of my business, and I'm not getting involved. Since you love to pry into other people's lives, figure it out yourself." He began walking backwards and smirked as I frowned back at him. "You should dress like that more often, you're smoking hot. People might forget how much of a frigid prude you are." He threw his helmet back on and pranced off to the rest of his team like the little sissy he was.

_Huh_.

For the life of me, I couldn't figure out Tyler. I needed to start texting him again on a daily basis and bug the ever living heck out of him.

Apparently, one couldn't just decide to become a cheerleader. This shit was pretty difficult and watching Elena do all sorts of flips and spins and backflips made me wonder why she ever stopped being a cheerleader when she looked so _friggin' awesome_.

I was always landing hard on my ass in this reality. Elena easily pulled me back up, grinning in amusement.

"Like this, Clare," she said, leaning backwards so that her hands touched the ground, creating an arch with her back, before pushing her body upward, doing a fucking handstand.

My mother had me do a lot of shit when I was younger. I had a private diving coach, a private swim coach, a private piano teacher. I went to the prestige New York school of manners and etiquette, I knew how to be a fine proper young lady! But gymnastics hadn't been one of those things mother thought would enhance my quality of life. I had clearly gotten the short end of the stick. Who cares if I could walk in five inch heels while balancing books on my head if I couldn't do a backflip?

"Sorcery!" I cried, pretending to be frightened. "No offense, Bon."

"Ha-ha." Bonnie rolled her eyes, but was grinning in amusement. "Here, you can do it too. I'll spot you."

"Don't let her break her neck," Caroline called from some feet away, doing some cheer routine with the other cheerleaders.

"It's okay if you do," I grinned wickedly at Bonnie. "I'll just get back up. Snapped necks are no big deal."

* * *

"You looked like you had a lot of fun today," I commented on lightly as we made our way back to the locker room. Elena laughed, shrugging.

"Maybe just a little," she confessed. "But that chapter in my life is over."

"It could still be a footnote," Bonnie said encouragingly. "You don't even have to take it seriously or be back on the squad. Just hang out with us after school, teach Clare how to do a proper handstand without nearly killing us."

_Nice_. Real nice. Thanks.

Elena chewed on her lower lip, looking conflicted. "I don't know Bon…"

A arm curled around my waist, hauling me effortlessly into one of the classrooms we had been walking past. I only had a split second to realize it was Damon, his heat and musk draping over me, assaulting every sense, before his mouth was hungrily on mine. He slammed me against the now closed classroom door. It was like a _switch_, a blazing fire of lust tearing through me with a demanding hiss, the familiar haze of desire burning every thought from my mind, leaving me hyperaware of every inch of Damon that was pressed hotly into me. My arms were tangling around his neck as I kissed him back with a feverish urgency. A low hungry growl rumbled from his throat as he gripped my hip with one hand, ripping the bow out of my hair with the other. The sound vibrated through me, fueling the painful electric heat that coiled around me.

"You have," he growled huskily between messy, rushed, kisses. "To be fucking crazy if," he yanked me upward and I wrapped my legs around his waist, my fingers clawing at his hair as he gripped my thighs tightly. His mouth was messily moving down my jaw, his breath hot and wet, pelting against my sensitive skin. I moaned softly, twisting my fingers in his hair. "You think I can stand to watch you prance around wearing fucking _that _without getting hard as hell."

My back hit something—the teacher's desk—and I moaned, though I wasn't sure if it was out of pain or pleasure. Damon crawled on top of me with a dark smirk, everything about him screamed _predator_. My heart skipped a few beats before choking, sputtering in my chest, as his darkening blue eyes raked across me with a ravenous hunger that had me aching wretchedly for him. It started as a dull throb, the uncomfortable need pooling hotly in my stomach. But it was quickly spreading, pulsating.

"_Fangs_," I demanded in a breathy voice that I could hardly recognized as my own. My desire, my painful need for him, was rapidly taking over.

Dark veins crawled across his beautiful face and he smirked, showing off the fangs that, not only have killed in front of me, but brought me to the brink of utter rapture. It sent a shock of pleasure through me, and I grabbed his face, kissing him as passionately as I could, pulling him back down. I needed Damon, I needed him to put his hands on every inch of my body. He growled into my mouth, roughly grabbing my waist and pulling me flush against him, his knee jerking my legs apart. A pitiful moan tugged from my throat as I squirmed under him, needing _more. _He bit down on my lower lip, jolting searing heat through my entire body as pain sliced through me. I helplessly yanked at his hair, another moan ripping from my throat.

Damon's hips were tightly grinding against mine, and I could feel _him _pressing against my thigh. It was almost maddening. I wanted him! Needed him! _Now! Now! Now!_ The electric, demanding, heat was coiled so tightly that each time he pressed into me, a wretched pulsing pang blazed through me, throwing me deeper and deeper into the haze of lust. I felt like I was going to explode—it was too hot, I needed to _feel _him! All of him! Damon's burning fingers dipped under my tank top, as though he felt the urgent need too, his hand gripping and clawing and pulling at every inch of my skin.

"Have dinner with me tonight," Damon murmured, messily making his way down my neck again, his fangs scraping, and I was having trouble understanding what he was _saying _when everything was a rush of heat. Everywhere his mouth went, a wet trail of blazing heat followed, my skin tingling.

I wanted him to bite me.

I wanted him to break my flesh with his fangs.

I wanted it to hurt.

"Wha?" I managed to force out, the world spinning around me, his tongue traced the column of my neck. My eyes fell shut as he nipped my collarbone, his hand sliding further up my stomach, pushing my tank top with it. I was choking on my moans.

"Dinner," Damon's voice was velvety and husky, almost a growl. His hand settled over the top of my bra as his mouth continued downward.

"Dinner?" I repeated hazily, not understanding what dinner had to do with what his mouth was fucking _doing _to me. My fingers tightened in his hair, and I arched into his hand as he kneaded my bra almost painfully. Fuck.

Oh God.

_Fuck_.

"Go out with me, Clarissa," Damon commanded hungrily, goosebumps prickling as his breath ghosted across my wet skin. He slid his tongue down my torso and I squirmed, my breathing coming out as shallow gasps, heat drenching across my cheeks. Oh God, oh God, Oh _God_. "On a date."

His hand slid from my bra, firming covering my mouth and sharp, white hot, pain sprinted through me as he sank his fangs into my flesh, right below my ribcage. I squirmed and he slammed me back down onto the desk, one hand firmly planted over my mouth as I moaned, the other gripping my hip, keeping me pinned under him. He bit down rougher and I clawed at his hair, tugging and ripping, tears of pain and agonizing pleasure leaking out.

I was on _fire_.

A fire that only Damon could ignite and extinguish.

"My gym teacher is feeding off me," I mumbled into his palm, staring hazily up at the fluorescent lights. Damon ran his tongue over the wound and a shudder of pleasure wracked my entire body.

"Your gym teacher is _eating _you." Damon corrected, his voice thick. Gently, feather light, he brushed his lips over where he had viciously bitten, and gently guided me into a sitting position. I blinked rapidly, my legs hanging off the edge of the desk.

I was feeling dazed.

Light headed.

It was almost surreal and his blue eyes seemed to actually be _glowing._

Damon pulled down my tank top, his hands lingering on my waist.

"I might have gotten greedy," his voice was still husky, his gaze both brightly glowing, yet dark in color. "And drank more than I should have."

I loosely wrapped my legs around his, my fingers curling in the front of his shirt. I tilted my head, looking up at him hazily. "You better take your pants off and do me. Right here. Right now. I swear to God, Damon."

He grabbed my face between his hands, the contact sending jolts through me, and kissed me with a devouring hunger that shook me to the core. "I'm picking you up at six. Dress cute."

And then I was alone.

And half dazed.

And seriously turned on.

And freakin' bleeding from where he impaled his fangs into me.

That son of a _bitch_.

* * *

"What about a werewolf?" Jeremy asked from my bed, playing some online MMO on the laptop, as I irritably went through my closet, looking for something not cute to spite Damon for leaving me in such a messed up state. I didn't even want to go on a date.

I wanted to freakin' research the Lockwoods.

"We saw him during the full moon, J," I reminded, putting my hands on my hips. Everything I owned was fucking amazing. Shit. "Remember? You cracked a joke about it. It was during the football game."

Jeremy didn't even look up at me. "Yeah, you mean when he apparently blacked out and attacked me? And decked you in the face?" Pfft. The asshole was on steroids. Mystery solved. "Hold on." I glanced at him curiously as he lifted the headset. "Hey, sorry, man, I was talking to my sister. Yeah about werewolves…"

If Jeremy wanted to start a rumor with his online buddies from California about Tyler being a werewolf, then he had my full support because that's friggin hilarious. I tuned the rest of his conversation out, prancing over to my vanity to check my texts.

Tyler: _wtf are you talking about_

He didn't take my subtle text too kindly. I decided to be more blunt: _do you howl at the moon? Are you some kind of supernatural being? Be honest sugartits, its important_.

"Do you think it's why Katherine came to Mystic Falls?" Jeremy's voice tugged me from my text and I threw the phone back down on my vanity. "I mean, the Lockwoods are one of the Founding families, and if they believe that the moonstone could _break _their curse… Maybe Katherine wanted to fake her death to get the freaky brothers off her back and gave the Moonstone in exchange?"

Jesus Christ. "That'd be something." That'd probably devastate Damon for a little while. It was one thing to choose me, it was another to come to terms with a realization that Katherine had been around and made no attempts at contacting him.

"That's probably what it is." Jeremy said after a moment, looking thoughtful. "It'd diabolical and clever. Especially from what we know of Katherine—it'd fit, you know?"

I ran my hands over my face, feeling antsy. I _hated _theories, I wanted _facts_. "But then why bother with Stefan and Damon?" While Jeremy's idea was horrifically probable, it just didn't make _sense_. Why bother with the Salvatore brothers? I could bet my life that Katherine wasn't one to let _love _risk her freedom.

"It's classic, C. Someone had to be left to talk about Katherine being dead, or stuck in a tomb." Jeremy shrugged and I frowned. "She needed that. And it'd be clear to anyone who met the two that they were both really in love with her, that the story wouldn't have been fabricated."

_If _this was true—or somewhere near the spectrum of truth—I would be lying through my fucking teeth if I didn't say I felt something akin to awed respect. Katherine was pure brilliance. At one point in time, Katherine was everything I had wanted to be. But then Mystic Falls with this family and these friends and _Damon _happened.

_If _the Lockwoods had some kind of werewolf gene going on, then it was highly probable that Katherine had made a deal with the Lockwoods, offering the Moonstone if they snuck her out of the Church the last minute. And _if _that was true, it would mean that Katherine _knew _about the plan to round up all the vampires ahead of time. Meaning she had _let _herself get caught.

So how did Stefan and Damon factor in? Other than the fact that Katherine lived with a 'no rules' motto and having both brothers to play with would be fun—but why turn them? So there would be talk of Katherine's death? So it would be believable to Klaus and Elijah? Something just didn't add up. I didn't want to run on _if_'s.

Taking my phone, I opened another text to Tyler, tapping my thumbs over the keys. How do I go about wording this…?

Me: _hey, no joke, if you do me one mega big favor, I will owe you for life_

Tyler's reply was instant: _get stefan kicked off the football team for starters. Since you're fucking the coach_.

I _wish_ I was fucking the coach.

Something I never thought I'd ever be wanting.

What even was my life, anymore?

I replied: _consider it done._

Tyler: _srsly? Ok. What do you want?_

Me: _Just find out if you have something called a Moonstone at your house. Don't let anyone know you're looking for it. your father probably has it hidden somewhere._

My life was just filled with conspiring, the supernatural, and wanting to have sex with my gym teacher. What a time to be alive.

Tyler: _First get Stefan off the team. Then I'll look into it_.

"I'm going to get Tyler to search around, see if they have the Moonstone…" I explained quickly to Jeremy, sighing, as I quickly wrote out a text explaining Jeremy's theory and Tyler's involvement, sending it to Elena, Stefan and Damon. I knew Damon would be the least happy about this theory, but keeping him out of the loop was a no go.

And maybe he'd be in enough of a bad mood to cancel the date.

I frowned as my stomach clenched. If Damon canceled the date over this…. I suddenly hoped he wouldn't. It would _hurt_. I mean, I couldn't, wouldn't, blame him. He was still… very much in love with Katherine, despite everything, and I knew Katherine would always hold a special spot in his heart _regardless_. It was just simply who Damon was.

It was impossible to doubt Damon, or his affections, or his decision. But that didn't mean I was able to hide from the sudden insecurity. I was suddenly nervous, unsure.

Chewing on my lip, I picked up my buzzing phone, a new feeling of dread tangling uncomfortably in my stomach. Two texts. One from Stefan. One from Damon.

Stefan: _But why wouldn't she have contacted us? That doesn't make sense._

It was true. Why put so much effort into Damon and Stefan, turn them, and drop them? Unless she really wanted someone to go on about her being dead? Unless something had gone wrong that night? Maybe Katherine had loved them. Or maybe she was lonely and wanted companions to be stuck with her. I chewed anxiously on my lower lip, pulling up Damon's text.

Damon: _boo that whore. Don't care. Your cute ass better be ready when I get there, I changed my mind and I'm coming to pick you up now. You're not getting out of this date and researching all weekend. I'll break your fucking computer_.

A giddiness bounced through me, a tiny smile growing. God, _what _insecurity? How could I ever feel any kind of insecurity when Damon said shit like that to me?

"Out!" I said quickly to Jeremy. "I have to get dressed! Take the laptop, I don't care!"

"AFK." Jeremy said, sliding the headset to his neck and picking up the laptop. I'm pretty sure he just said something awful to me in gamer speech.

I rushed him out of the room, freaked out, and exploded into Elena's, half surprised to see Bonnie sitting on her bed. Bonnie came home with us?

"Hurry make me look girly and pretty!" I blurted out as Elena opened her mouth. She gave me a look. "Damon's coming! Date! Pretty girl time!"

"He's taking you on a _date_?" Bonnie asked, eyes lighting up excitedly, as she slid off Elena's bed.

"Oh boy, Clare snagged a date with our gym teacher." Elena grinned, teasingly, as Bonnie grabbed me by the shoulders and pushed me back into my room. "Lucky you."

"Yeah, lucky her! He's hot!" Bonnie didn't have time for Elena's mocking and shoved me down at my vanity dresser. "Don't worry, Clare, I got this."

"Well, I'm happy he's at least attempting to act like a good boyfriend," Elena sighed, taking the brush to my hair. I winced but sat as still as I could as she brushed.

"Damon hasn't been anything but good to Clare," Bonnie dismissed as she went through my closet. "You need to stop being so…"

"She just doesn't like the fact that Damon killed me a few times," I said with a shrug.

"What do you mean a _few_?" Elena snapped. Whoops! "He's killed you more than _once_?" The brushing was becoming more rough. What have I done?

"I don't even want to know," Bonnie snorted, shaking her head, as she started pulling clothes out of my closet. "Where are you guys going? To dinner? To a fancy restaurant?"

"I… I dunno. He just told me to dress cute." I shifted awkwardly, suddenly more interested in my vanity. I walked my fingers across the surface. "He was supposed to pick me up at six, but decided to get me now. So…"

"Hmmm, it's obviously not somewhere that needs reservations," Bonnie mumbled to herself. Damon could just compel his way in, though. "And it can't be a movie…" Sure it could be.

Bonnie picked out a cute light blue shirt with the picture of a pretty white bow on it, a knee length layered frilly white skirt, black knee socks with bows on them and a pair of blue ballerina flats. By the time she and Elena were done fussing over me, I was beyond done with even wanting to look girly. None of the left over jitters stuck around and I was growing impatient.

I knew how to look good in everything and anything. I'd sent too much of my life looking perfectly presentable, so this was just a giant mistake. So much regret was already being had.

Chiming echoed throughout the house.

"He's ringing the doorbell?" Elena frowned as I jumped quickly out of the seat. "He's _actually _ringing the doorbell?"

"Aw, it's cute," Bonnie gushed, pulling me into a hug before I could duck out of the room. "He's trying to be a real gentleman. Now we sit up here for another ten minutes, make him wait."

"Nope," I wiggled out of her hold and darted from the room. I had enough of Bonnie-Elena time!

I pranced down the steps and nearly made it to the door, but Jenna had slid in front of me with a vicious smirk.

_Why_?

"Ha! Beat you." She straightened and opened the door. "Hello, Damon," she greeted with her sassy voice that just immediately spelled out disaster. "You do know that Clare is _seventeen_, right?"

What the hell, Jenna? I heard Elena snort behind me and I just wanted the ground to swallow me when I realized Bonnie and Elena were behind me.

"Hello, Jenna," Damon was sarcastic to Jenna's sass. "You do know that I'm a hundred and sixty-nine, right?"

"Is everyone in on this vampire thing?" Bonnie wondered loudly causing Jenna to jump and turn around quickly. "Is this a running joke or…?"

"Bonnie!" Jenna's gaze flickered to me, as though it was _my _fault Bonnie was standing right there. Pfft.

"I already told Bonnie the truth, she just doesn't want to hear it." I huffed as Damon stepped past Jenna, his blue eyes sliding over me observantly.

Damon was wearing the jacket I had picked out for him, both his jeans and shirt dark in color (he looked good in black) and while he looked nice, his choice of clothing made me feel more at ease. He wasn't dressed for us to go somewhere stupidly fancy. _Though _Damon would have no qualms about sauntering into an upscale restaurant dressed like a bum.

He grinned devilishly, obviously catching on that I was trying to figure out what we were doing based on his clothes, and pulled out a bouquet of large white lilies and yellow roses from behind his back. My insides spasmed nervously, a tiny smile creeping across my face. Jesus Christ, Damon brought me _flowers_. And I was _giddy _about it.

"Thank you, Damon," I murmured, my cheeks warming, as I took the flowers from him. "They're lovely."

"Mmhm, really impressive," Jenna quipped, hands on her hips. "Lilies and yellow roses? Not very romantic. But I guess it's a step up from pulling weeds out of the yard and showing up with them." Bonnie slid forward, easily taking the flowers from me before Jenna had a chance to set them on fire. "Clare, don't step out of your underwear just because this jackass shows up with flowers."

Oh my God. Jenna, why?

"Haven't you heard? Damon is going _Disney_ for Clare." Bonnie said in a singsong voice as she skipped off into the kitchen with the flowers. Oh dear God. I shot a look after her.

"I'm _sure_." Jenna scoffed.

"That's what I said." Elena sniffed, standing beside our aunt. The both of them looked equally disapproving and equally sassy, brows raised, eyes judgmentally digging into Damon.

"He wants to be Disney, I don't," I cut in before they could tag team insult Damon, or before he had a chance to say something snarky. "I've been throwing myself at him. He won't have sex with me! All I want is to be done right! On the floor! In the back of a car! But he won't! He's a proper old fashioned asshole!"

Bonnie's amused cackle broke the horrified look on Jenna's face and the very embarrassed _why are we related _look Elena was sending me.

"I've dated many hims," Jenna said at once, turning to look Damon up and down. "I know your type. You hurt Clare and I'll cut it off. With a wooden spoon."

"Mmm, because you and Elena have really _bothered _to get to know me." Damon rolled his eyes, sounding completely indifferent. "You dated what you _think _I'm like. Sorry to burst your delusional bubble, but I'm nothing like anyone you've ever met, and I'm not _going _anywhere, you can't scare me off. So don't put your failed relationships onto ours, especially when you _continue _to choose the wrong types of men to hang around."

A glimmer of respect flickered across Jenna's expression, though I wasn't surprised, while Elena looked a bit guilty. The two glanced at each other and I inched closer to Damon.

This was horrifically awkward.

"Curfew is eleven. Not a second later." Jenna finally said, pointing threateningly at Damon. "You have _one_ chance. I will keep an open mind about this. But the very moment you screw up, I will make it very difficult for the both of you to see each other. _Understood_?"

"Yup! Bye!" I snatched Damon's hand and dragged him out of the house before anyone could say any more dumb things, slamming the door behind us. "That was awkward as shit."

Damon snorted. "You want Jenna to feel like she has control and is the authority figure," he reminded pleasantly, his fingers lacing with mine as he led us back to his car. "So I'm letting that happen. Awkward disapproving parental guardians are key to teenage relationships. Do you feel normal yet?"

"I'll never feel normal." I shrugged as he opened the car door for me. "I'm going out on a date with my gym teacher."

Damon shoved me into the car. Not two minutes in, and I was already regretting wearing a skirt.

* * *

Of all the places Damon could have possibly taken me, I really hadn't thought it'd be in the middle of nowhere woods.

"Are we burying another body?" Hey, with Damon, it was possible. Nice romantic bonding over a corpse.

"You'll see," was my cryptic answer. In one fluid motion, Damon was carrying me. He smirked as my heart stammered in my chest, the feel of his hands on my skin sending my body into overdrive. "You're wearing flats, it'd be a pain in the ass to walk there. Plus this is _faster_."

I didn't even have time to think up something to say, my hair blowing into my face. And then he was helping me back down to the ground. Friggin' vampire speed. I wasn't even sure why I let Elena brush my hair like this, all her hard work was for naught. My hair was ruined.

I brushed my hair out of my face and glanced around. We were in a clearing, the remains of what looked like could have been a basement dug into the ground with a stone wall around it. I glanced at Damon curiously.

"They'd never find your body here," Damon stated seriously. "Ta-da. My evil plan is finally revealed. I lured you into a false sense of security and now I'm gonna eat you."

He was nervous. It always seemed to throw me whenever he was nervous, he just wasn't the _type_. Or rather, the way he presented himself made it seem bizarre whenever he was anything but cocky, nonchalant, vampire dickery Damon. His blue eyes slid away from mine and I realized he realized I'd seen past his charade.

"Oh teh nose," I said quickly, going along with it. "You'd get all the evil vampire dickery awards if you stuffed iron down my throat and left me to rot here. Seriously. Nobody would have seen it coming. Not even Jenna and Elena." They talked big, but in the end, neither of them thought Damon was an actual threat.

They wouldn't let me leave if they actually did.

Damon gently tugged me closer to him, his fingertips slowly inching across my wrist, his gaze locked onto the stone wall. I stood next him quietly, watching his expression tilt toward wistful, a faint smirk sliding across his face.

"When mother was pregnant with Stef," Damon began softly, taking my hand in his and leading me closer. "Father had a special cottage built for her. I think it might've been the kindest thing he had done for her, though I suspect now he just wanted to fool around with the maids." Damon scoffed, looking momentarily annoyed, as he stroked the back of my hand with his thumb. "She loved being out here, she liked the peaceful coziness of it all. I'd stay out here with her for weeks, she'd sit by her garden and I'd read to her… We were both so excited for Stefan to come. I… I still see so much of herwhen I look at him."

I tried to picture what the cottage might've looked like. I could easily see little Damon sitting by his mother, reading her stories. It brought a smile to my face—the mental image was precious. _Damon _had been precious. He loved so much more deeply than anyone I'd ever met and I wondered if it was just him, or if it was a vampire thing to hold onto those feelings. It was so loud, so clear, in his voice and his face. There was a certain softness to him when he spoke about his mother that I'd never seen before.

"She was a lot like Stefan." He continued softly. "And there are certain _aspects_ of you that remind me of her, too."

I was suddenly so very aware of his gaze. Damon could do a lot with a mere stare, all of which usually left me short of breath. I forced myself to meet his heavy blue gaze, the intensity keeping me completely rooted to the ground. He touched every inch of my face with his eyes.

"If your mother informed you that you were to marry someone, what would you say?" Damon abruptly changed the topic and I blinked as his blue eyes flickered away. I nearly fell forward, a little dazed.

"I wouldn't say anything," I replied with a slight shrug. "To be honest, that's not exactly… It wouldn't have been unexpected. Get married to a well-to-do man, have a well-to-do life and a respectable family."

"It's so opposite of your personality it's disgusting." Damon dropped my hand to run his through his hair, clearly agitated. "Even now, if Jenna asked, you'd probably do it. Because you have these ideals ingrained into your head of how you should be, that you wouldn't even think to argue it. That was my mother. She was meant for so much more, a happiness she could never know. She was like you, and you still hold a loyalty to being an Everett." His gaze tilted back to me. "The married and children lifestyle doesn't—it isn't for you. You'd be trapped. Like she was. Not loved as you should've been—unappreciated. She should've run. She was meant for so much _more_."

I swatted his arm, drawing his gaze back to me. This was crap. All of it. He couldn't continue living his non-life _thinking _this way. How could he not _understand_?

"She had you. She had _you_, Damon, and that makes _everything _worth it. I know for a _fact_ that she was the happiest, you're the _greatest_ gift! You are _everything_. She wasn't _trapped_, and she lives through you still. I'll bet you anything she didn't fear death, because she knew Stefan would be in good hands with _you_! Even now! You're a good brother, even when you want to smash his face in! She lives forever because you will love her forever, in a way that nobody else can, in a way that makes it all worth it." Damon was staring at me and I prodded his shoulder with a finger, grinning at him teasingly. "You were her freedom and now you're mine."

He snatched my hand, lacing our fingers, his gaze warming considerably. "She was like that too. She always knew what to say, and it wasn't shit, she _meant _it. Like how you mean it." Damon smirked, amused, and I was having trouble keeping up with his mood fluctuations today. He rudely tugged my hand, leading me toward a rather large tree and I stumbled after him. "After mother—well… Stef and I were the only ones who came here. It was our place to get away from everyone, to hide, I guess. Now you know of it too. 'Cause you're _speeecial_."

Damon had gone from nervous, to fond, to depressed, to amused, to… Well, I wasn't really sure what he was right now. He grinned wolfishly at me, and I was fairly certain it held a twinge of nervousness, like he wasn't sure how I was about to react. Nerves sparked instantly and he squinted his eyes, his fingers gliding up my palm, stroking where my pulse met skin on my wrist. He nodded to the tree and I took a breath, trying to calm myself down. I was freaking myself out for no reason.

Just because Damon's emotions were all over the place didn't mean mine had to be.

I turned my attention, gazing over the two familiar names and the one that wasn't.

_Colette Salvatore_.

Damon leaned closer to me, resting his chin on my shoulder. "I was younger, she used to tell me this story about how her love was like a tree. It started off new and fragile but it grew and grew and grew. She said her love for her family, for me, would never die. It was the only thing that was truly immortal. It would grow forever. It would be the only tree to touch _heaven_."

_Damon Salvatore_ was written right under it followed by _Stefan Salvatore_.

I trailed my fingertips over Colette's name.

"Your son is a dick." I told Colette's tree softly. "Both of them, actually. But mostly Damon."

"What are you doing?" Damon wondered incredulously, looping his arms around me.

"I'm talking to your mom." _Duh_. It's like Damon's never watched any romantic comedies. This was the part where I talked to his dead parents and it was an adorable bonding experience. I raised my other hand, showing off the ring. "Yeah I know. He gave me your ring. No, not even, he wasn't proposing, he just did it because whatever. Grandkids? Oh well… He can't reproduce now that he's a creature of darkness, but we can plant you little trees…" I pressed my palm flat against the tree, Colette's name dead center. "I swear I'll never let Damon hurt ever again." Never, ever, again. I meant it with everything inside of me. I _vowed _it. To her. To myself. To Damon.

Damon's hand slid over mine, engulfing it, pressing our hands tighter against Colette's tree. My cheeks warmed, my heart fluttering, though I wasn't sure _why_.

"This is Clarissa," Damon spoke quietly. "She's not an Everett anymore, but she's not a Gilbert either. She _might_ be a fairy, and she's definitely not human. She doesn't belong to one thing or another, but then, I don't either anymore. So now we belong to _each other_." He spun me around, gently taking my face in his hands. I melted into his touch, sighing happily. "Don't freak out."

What the hell was he about to do?

Damon's soft gaze slid across my face. "I'm going to carve your name into the tree," he began and his hand slapped over my mouth. I was struggling to breathe as my heart stilled. _My name. Tree. Love._ "Shhhh." I swatted his hand away.

"No!" I hissed, as though I had to keep my voice low so his friggin' tree-mom wouldn't hear. "Damon—stop. I get it, we're getting really romantic, but this is a _special tree_! The—your—your mother! Stories about love!"

"I have a tattoo to match yours, and I'll probably outlive this tree," Damon said casually and I choked, sputtering.

"This is a special tree!" I repeated breathlessly.

"The way I feel about you… It was new and fragile and it'll grow and grow and grow." His blue gaze was so very gentle and yet could have me crumbling to the ground if it wasn't for Damon's arm that slid around my waist. He drew me closer to him and I clutched onto the front of his jacket, dizzy. He tilted his head, leaning his face closer to mine. "I know I overwhelm you, and I'm trying to take it slowly as I can. I know that for you it feels so sudden. But you overwhelm _me_. You've been overwhelming me before I started overwhelming _you_. It's okay. It's just a silly romantic gesture because I'm a crazy vampire but it's also really serious and I'm not taking this lightly. You're already there, so I might as well put your name down. The reality of it still stands regardless if I do or not."

Christ. Friggin' Christ. Okay. It was okay. This was totally fine. We weren't moving too fast or slow and Damon was just _intense_. And extreme.

_But he didn't put Katherine's name on the his mother's tree_.

My heart skipped a few beats and I lowered my gaze away from his searing blue one. I glanced back to the Colette's tree. He introduced _me _to her. He brought _me_ here. I took a shaky breath. Okay. This was new for him too.

No reason to freak out.

_I didn't have commitment issues!_

"Are you going to put our name in a heart?" I deadpanned sarcastically and Damon grinned darkly.

"Now I am." He hummed, pulling his arm back slowly as though to test if I was about to fall flat on my ass. I took a few shaky steps away from him. "Suck it, Clary. Deal with my romantic declarations."

I watched as Damon whipped out a pocket knife and carved _'+ Clarissa_' after _Damon Salvatore_. I'm such a fuck, it made me giddy as hell.

"Should I combine the two last names? Make you Gilberett?" Damon tilted his gaze to meet mine and I wrinkled my nose. That sounded hideous. He snorted, rolling his eyes and nodding. "You're right. I should leave it blank so I could carve in _Salvatore _later."

I stared at him in horror and he burst into loud, amused, asshole laughter.

"Mmm, relax. That won't be an issue," _YET_ was basically being screamed at me and I eyed him unhappily. "Shh, birdhouse, stop freaking out. I was _kidding_. You must be getting cranky. You need some food."

I patted my stomach warily. I _was _hungry. "Where are we eating?"

"Somewhere horribly fancy," Damon slung an arm over my shoulders, leading me away from the clearing. "You'll probably be slapping yourself _all _throughout dinner." He seemed so excited about that and I hoped to God he was kidding.

I had a horrible feeling that he wasn't.

Goddamn it.

* * *

fantastic. Okay. 17k words and only three scenes. i'm so done with myself. ANYWAY. originally this was going to be a quick thing I wrote for you guys following the tumblr, but since Fae questions come up often, I decided, why not. Here. If you guys are curious, here are more things about Fae for you.

* * *

A Guide To Teran's Fae

* * *

**_Fae_** (faery, fairfolk, children of the sun, and every variation of the word "fairy"): an immortal race of beings that live in the "in between" of reality, in their own realm, which can only be accessed by those who already know where it is. They are mischievous, playful, creatures with the ability to hide objects with their Fae Glamour or influence other supernatural creatures and human alike to do their bidding. Fae are typically described as sunny childlike beings with chiming laughter. They tend to be seen as bird like with an obsession with sugary drinks and foods.

_Fae _are mischievous creatures by nature, taking delight in the misfortune of others and playing (sometimes very harmful) pranks on one another, and, if the mood strikes, humans. Their level of mischief typically depends on their boredom (a bored Fae is a dangerous Fae), and can range from hiding articles of clothing from the unsuspecting human to hiding a mother's infant. Fae have been responsible for a few wars here and there among the humans, easily Glamouring both sides into wanting to fight. Revolutions, uprisings, riots are also typically Fae-influenced, as Fae quickly grow bored and seek the amusement of watching humans "play", picking favorites. Fae can even go as far as stirring petty arguments between married couples and even creating drama between human children.

_Fae_ are fiercely protective and loyal. They take personal offense if one of their own has been insulted or slighted, even if the offense has been unintentional (or sometimes without realizing there are Fae to offend). A human can accidentally evoke the rage of Fae by doing something as small as not leaving cookies out when the Fae has felt they have been invited in, and so should be bestowed with gifts, regardless if the human even realizes there are Fae within their home.

_Fae_, like their immortal cousins, the vampires, do need to be invited in. However, the invitation doesn't need to be verbal and Fae can take anything at all as a sign that they are welcomed. However, if the invitation is revoked, the Fae will be forced to leave. Humans, typically witches, who know of Fae often have primroses surrounding their home, which is a sign that Fae are unwelcomed, and so they cannot enter. Red ochre can also be used to drive Fae away, as it contains elements of iron. And is _red_.

_While_ humans are extremely susceptible to the Fae (and Fae Glamour), often taking a stray Fae in, the playful childlike innocence Fae typically display have been known to be particularly strong with werewolves. It calls to the wolf's inner sense to protect their pack and their young. Werewolves have been known as _Guardians of Fae_, even willingly attacking those who have slighted the Fae in their charge. Witches remain one of the few who are completely immune to Fae. (Also Derek Hale. Who hates Clarissa passionately.)

_A_ Fae's ability to Glamour is more of a psychic suggestion, and unlike their immortal cousins, the vampires, it can be refused. The Glamoured individual only feels a heightened sense of wanting to do as the Fae wishes, a slight _pulse _to please the Fae. However, the stronger the Glamoured individual's feelings are for the Fae, the stronger the Glamour. _Four Leaf Clovers_ are the only known plant to break the Fae Glamour.

_For_ Fae, time does not exist. It is a constant stream of _being_. The Fae simply have always been. It has become a rarity for Fae to have fledglings (Fae children), as they continuously live. There isn't much that can kill a Fae, even the removal of the heart. A Fae can regrow their internal organs, or, if there had been a lot of physical damage to the body, they can reincarnate themselves. Iron has been the only known element to permanently kill Fae.

_When_ Fae enter the realm of mortals, they usually form a bond with a songbird to watch over them. The chosen songbird has the ability to relay messages to the Fae's Court.

_Fae_ do not possess the ability to lie. Because of a Fae's mischievous nature, it was placed upon them this restriction, in fear of Fae. Though Fae have long since perfected the art of "truth telling". However being asked point blank, no amount of pretty words and implications can hide the truth.

_Fae_ come in all shapes and sizes depending on which Court they belong to. Despite the different beliefs, cultures, appearances, all Fae abide by _Fae Law_, which is applied to every supernatural and human being, regardless if that being is aware of _Fae Law_.

_The First Law_, all shall abide to Fae Law.  
_The Second Law_, all shall respect Fae belongings. None shall take, harm, slight or steal what Fae considers as _theirs_. This includes, and is not limited to, objects and living beings.  
_The Third Law_, offend One is to offend All.  
_The Fourth Law_, Fae must be invited by that Court's Council to enter another Court.

_Abilities: _Fae Glamour, which creates an illusion (that is breakable by _four leaf clovers_). Fae Glamour can create an illusion of appearances, _hide _objects (or beings) in plain sight, induce thoughts, desires, emotions (a Fae's emotions can influence other's around them, e.i a sad Fae can cause others to feel sadness, a happy Fae can caue others to feel happiness, etc) and night terrors. _Fae Magic_usually depends on the Fae's court, however all Fae can move through _The Haze_, the in between Fae Realm and Earth. The many string of realities are accessible for Fae. A Fae's magic is usually used to play pranks on humans (or other supernatural beings). Fae love music and dancing, however, if a mortal chose to dance with a Fae, they would dance until they died.

_Diet: _Fae have a preference for sweets, but can generally eat anything.

_Weakness_: Iron. Like the werewolves and vampires, who can be harmed by herbs, daisies have been found to burn and weaken Fae. Unicorns and the color red have been known to ward off Fae.

_Fae Name_. To know the name of a Fae is a very private and intimate affair, as Fae can be heavily influenced by their own name. To Fae, names are more than just names, it _is_ the Fae. Names are sacred, and should only spoken if it is to be cherished. Names are gifts, and so to be bestowed a kind name by Fae is considered to be the one of the highest form of respect and affection. However, to be renamed by Fae in a mocking manner means that Fae considers that being to be unworthy of their own name, unworthy of being seen.

_Fae_ do not have an equivalent of the human courtship, nor do they bind themselves to a single Fae. Fae are puzzled and curious by these human rituals, as Fae simply are, and so cannot convince of why they would bind themselves a just one other. Nor do they understand why mortals go through the bizarre ritual of trying to get another to be with them. For Fae, mortals live for a few years, and so they cannot understand why mortals waste time courting instead of simply enjoying one another as Fae do. All Fae in their Court love one another deeply and delight in each other. All Fae in their Court belong to one another.

_Fae Kiss_. Fae do not view kissing as humans do. Despite Fae belonging to one another, a Fae Kiss is almost as sacred as a Fae's name. A Fae Kiss transfers a Fae's very being into another. A Fae will kiss their fledgling. A Fae Kiss says 'I am you and you are I'. A Fae Kiss may have magical properties.

_Kiss of Life_. Fiction derives from truth, there is a reason why _fairy_tales are called what they are. Fae have the ability to revive through pressing their lips to another, using a _Fae Kiss_ to transfer some of their essence into the fallen.

_Fae Gifts_. Fae generally expect to be bestowed with gifts, however, Fae may _bestow _gifts. It should be noted that whatever a Fae gives, they expect back something even greater in a show of gratitude. It is always unwise to accept a Fae gift, though to reject a Fae gift may offend the Fae.

* * *

IF you guys have any requests about the little adventures Clarissa & Co. get themselves into over the course of the month/have something you'd like to see, let me know, and I'll see if I can add it in. I'd like to say I'll be making each scene shorter, but I can't be sure.

I know I usually answer questions, but I'm about to fall over. BLAAAGH.

AS ALWAYS, A BIG, MEGA HUGE, FRIGGIN' THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO HAS REVIEWED. You guys are seriously the best, I love you! I love your beautiful, wonderful, reviews. Keep telling me everything going on in your lives! I know a lot of you are going through some difficult times, and I just want to hug you. I've been really tempted to PM a few of you, but I don't know if that's crossing any lines. I'm here for you guys, if you ever need to vent, don't be afraid to message me! Or let me know if it's okay to message you! Seriously guys, hope you are all well.


	21. Chapter 21

Disclaimer: At this point, all I don't own is the characters. Pfft. Maureen (Red) belongs to my bb JackieOh, though!

Holy shit it's been like 300+ years! I'm so sorry guys! Those following the tumblr know I had to take a break because of medication, which then spiraled into me getting sick. I'm so sorry! I also really struggled with coming up with a "first date", I had no intentions of writing it, BUT YOU ASKED SO I SHALL DELIVER.

A MEGA HUGE SHOUTOUT TO JASMINE AND MY BB 1LLU510N! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE COVERS! I LOVE THEM! (Current cover was made by 1llu510n!)  
I also wrote the majority of this fic listening to _Shake Tramp_. I'm pretty sure _Marianas Trench_ is now one of my favorite songs. Thank you for the suggestion VampireSa5m1993!

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Friday, October 8th  
First Date & Bad Music

* * *

_Tap, tap, tap, tappity-tap-tap_.

Damon's head tilted a fraction to the right, blue eyes sliding over Clarissa as she continued to run her fingertips across the dashboard almost absentmindedly, slender fingers moving fluidly, seamlessly, as though she were in front of a piano.

_Tap, tap, tap, tap_-_ta-ta-tap-tapity-tap-tap, tap_.

His lips curved into a grin, finally catching onto which piece she was subconsciously playing. Robert Schumann's Kreisleriana Op. 16, Ausserst bewegt. He wondered how antsy she was now that he banned all and any supernatural related talk. He didn't want to hear about what Katherine _might_ be up to, or if the Lockwoods were a bunch of prissy werewolves. He wanted the focus to remain on _him_, otherwise this entire date would quickly go up in a puff of smoke and he wouldn't even be an afterthought.

"Why _gym_ teacher?" Clarissa's eyes swirled around to meet his, the light of the quickly fading sun creeping across the seat, draping her in an orange glow. It lit her curious blue-gray eyes up, making them gleam like two pieces of sea glass more than ever.

The tips of his fingers ached, the desire to reach out, to touch her, began to burn hungrily.

"What can I say…?" Damon drawled out lazily, a charming grin easily forming across his face. "Where you go, _I _go." Zero reaction. Not even a light dusting of pink across her cheeks. _Disappointing_ but not unsurprising. She wasn't buying it, so Damon decided to try again. Tired of keeping his hands to himself, he lightly trailed his fingertips up her soft arm, seeking the calming relief only touching Clarissa provided. "I loathe the fact that my brother gets to see you all day. I'm jealous."

It wasn't exactly _all _bullshit.

A large part of him _was _there strictly because of her.

And getting to tease the hell out of Clarissa was a _bonus. _

Her earlier sheer flabbergasted, sputtering, reaction, cheeks swamped with bright red, mouth agape, unable to make a single fucking coherent sentence, had him smug as hell. A feeling that lingered throughout the entire day. He _loved _causing her to literally _fall over herself _at the mere sound of his voice, her body immediately and loudly reacting to him. It made him feel less like an idiot for losing his breath upon seeing her, pathetically trying to come up with something suave to say. It left him feeling a little hazy with how extreme her reactions were just over _seeing _him, the warmth spreading through him quickly.

It was one of his specialties, getting Clarissa to flush. When he began to catch on that it was an impressive feat, it ignited a dark rapacious glee within him. Only _he _could do this to the haughty _Little Miss Clarissa_, who held herself above such things, who would be _damned _to let anyone hold any kind of power over her emotionally and _sexually_. He easily had her a quivering mess with a single look. With a flash of fangs, a dark chuckle, and merely ghosting his fingertips across her feverish flesh, he had the proud, haughtily indifferent, Clarissa completely surrendering herself to him. He loved ripping her control to shreds, he loved that she couldn't hide it from him, or anyone else. It drove him crazy how loudly she expressed her affections, how she clearly wanted, _needed_, him like he did her.

Damon's thoughts tilted as a _knowing _look flickered across her face, gray-blue eyes glinting as a grin tugged slowly across her lips. Damon figured she'd see right through him. Sometimes he felt like he was a book written in many different languages that only Clarissa was able to read.

"_Fiiiine_," she puffed out, amusement playing across her face, her smile growing. "_Keep _your Damon Dickery plots."

Damon's fingers continued moving upward slowly, relishing in her. He still felt a little _giddy _over the fact that she was actually, happily, _his_. He was still reeling over how easy it was to be in her company, how easily she understood, accepted and _wanted _him. If he didn't tell her something it was _fine_, she _trusted _him. His palm skated across her cheek, his fingers sinking in her hair, and Clarissa sighed, leaning into his touch, as though she physically could not restrain herself from doing so.

It shot a pulse of thrill through Damon, his heart beating just a little bit faster. He had to tear his eyes from her, refocusing on the road, as she nuzzled into his skin. He lightly thumbed her earlobe.

"_Accept _my romantic reasons, Clarissa," he purred cockily, turning to her again to openly smirk, smugly pleased as her gaze flickered down to his mouth. The familiar _th-thump _of her heart causing his smirk to grow. His fangs were starting to ache, craving to sink into her flesh. He wanted to _feel _everything she was feeling, wanted her to consume him. "Mmm, I forget, you _love _my vampire dickery. I guess if I tell you the terrible shit I'm up to, you'd sooner be romanced by that than this date I have planned."

He listened as her heart skipped a few beats as she struggled on her own breath. "I—" she began but Damon wasn't really in the mood for her sputtering denials. He knew she was reacting to his choice of a certain word that apparently had her running in the opposite direction.

"Volunteering to help out the school looks _good_," he murmured in a low voice, his fingers gently brushing across her neck, soothing her. He could feel her pulse humming under the pad of his thumb. "I'm doing my part to help out this _wonderful_ town I live in."

Clarissa's gaze pinned him with a rapidly growing mischievous understanding, excitement brimming brightly in her eyes, a dark smile curling across her pretty mouth. She easily read between the lines and leaned closer, the familiar smell of her apple shampoo and a sweetness that lingered around her wafting over him. He wanted to bite her, wanted to taste her.

"You're going to infiltrate the secret vampire hating council," Clarissa said breathlessly as he withdrew his hand from her teasing flesh.

He needed to keep both hands on the steering wheel, he was seconds away from pulling her into his lap and kissing her with every ounce of desire in his fucking body. He wanted her moaning his name, wanted her fingers digging into him as he sank his fangs into her pretty little neck. He wanted to kiss her senselessly, wanted her to kiss him back just as passionately.

"Mmmhmm." But he couldn't do that now. Not yet. So instead he pushed the demanding ache aside and smirked, as though he wasn't already half crazy for her. "I _am _a Founding family, after all, and with Zach out of the way, they're one Salvatore short." And then he was going to kill them. One by one. Over a stretch of time. All made to look like accidental deaths. "_Plus _I'm the only one supplying the vervain."

A wide grin sprinted across Clarissa's gleeful face, her glowing adoring gaze filled with an excited mischief that was making it harder and harder to concentrate on driving. Clarissa's mood had always bounced off his, but since learning his little hummingbird wasn't so human and had the ability to _Glamour_, Damon had a quiet suspicion that she was also able to influence his mood. Not that he was complaining, he _liked _following her into her moods, especially when everything just felt so _good_.

"Oh my God, this is brilliant! You're _brilliant_!" Clarissa gushed, warming him instantly. He could live off her praise. She was leaning into his space, fingers dancing across his arm excitedly. "I want _in_."

A dark, wicked, grin flew across his lips as he tilted his blue eyes toward his little birdhouse who so gleefully was ready to conspire to do _ungodly _things with him. _Fuck it_. Grabbing the back of her neck, he pulled her face to his, kissing her hungrily. Clarissa's heartbeat urged him on, her kiss addictively sweet.

This was going to be romantic, damn it.

Pulling her lower lip into his mouth, he nibbled lightly, his fangs sliding out, and she moaned softly.

A _romantic _date.

Not _seduce Clarissa by talking about vampire dickery related things_ which leads to ravishing her in his car like some hormonal teenage boy. Why the hell was it so hard to control himself when it came to her?

She jerked back suddenly much to his frustration, eyes wide, cheeks red. "You can't kiss and drive!" Clarissa paused, eyes roaming across his face, as he growled lowly under his breath, shifting, trying to cool himself down. "Gettin' a little veiny eyed, huh?"

"You're the one conditioning me," he shot back playfully, tossing her a fanged smirk that sent her heart in a fit. "_Fangs _are romantic for Little Miss Disney."

He slowed the car to the stop which instantly redirected her attention to the window, her retort swallowed by her obvious _curious _confusion. Damon smothered his growing amusement, watching her eye the surrounding trees and the obvious lack of any kind of restaurant. Damon had unintentionally distracted her from realizing he'd driven off the road, following a dirt path to a small field. His amusement, however, was quickly becoming short lived, replaced by an awkward nervousness that twisted in his gut. Not giving her the opportunity to turn around and spout out something sarcastic, he flitted to her side of the car, pulling open the door and, with a charming grin, offering her a hand.

He hoped to fuck she couldn't tell how nervous he was.

_Th-thump, th-thump_.

_She _was nervous, too, and peered up at him with her suddenly shy adoring blue-gray eyes. Lightly, she placed her hand in his and he curled his fingers, easily pulling her from the car. Clarissa came from a world, a lifestyle, where his gentlemanly acts were _expected_. Damon knew if he were anyone else, she'd hardly notice and would feel offended if the doors weren't held open or if she wasn't offered help in and out of vehicles. But it was special when _he _did it and it made his heart scatter inside his chest when she smiled shyly, eyes bright with admiring appreciation. As though she had never experienced such treatment, as though each time he behaved so, it was for the first time and she was deeply, pleasantly, surprised and shyly flattered. He was determined to top her old lifestyle, and one-upping was one of his specialties.

Clarissa's eyes tilted away, observing the cluster of trees that surrounded them, fairy lights hanging on low branches.

"If you're wondering if I brought you out here because I plan to kill a bear with my bare hands and cook it," Damon began playfully, moving toward the trunk of the car. "Then you're correct."

"You better skin it with your teeth," she played along cheerfully, gliding to his side, a grin across her face. "I've always wanted a fur coat."

He stuffed the folded blanket into her arms. "I promised you that I'd show you a whole new world," he said as she stumbled a bit, shifting the blanket awkwardly and staring down at it in confusion. He wondered if Clarissa even knew what a picnic _was_. "There's your magic carpet, princess." He plucked the basket up, smirking at the utter confusion on her face. "We're having a romantic picnic under the stars."

He let Clarissa pick the spot in the clearing where they'd set up, and he wasn't at all surprised when she took ten minutes deciding which spot would be _perfect_.

_Pain in his freakin' ass_.

He couldn't keep from rolling his eyes. "It's all the same. Just throw the blanket down and sit your ass down."

"Be romantic at me, and romantically, happily, put up with my indecisiveness." Clarissa sang back, brandishing a finger airily as she eyed a spot on the ground. He snatched her finger, yanking playfully. "I'm not sure why you had me get cute if we're just going to sit on the ground."

Oh _lord_.

"You should be dressing to impress me constantly." Damon shot back with a smirk, tilting his head haughtily and squinting at her. By now it was mostly dark, but the area around them was pleasantly lit by the glowing fairy lights in a way that was comfortable, but didn't take away from the starlight.

Clarissa was most definitely shifting into _Everett _mode with the look she was giving him. This is what he had been wanting to _avoid_. It's why he'd opted for doing something that wouldn't involve a fancy place. Not that anywhere close by had the kind of restaurants that held an inkling to the sort she dined in as an Everett. He flicked her nose and ripped the blanket from her arms.

"You'd be impressed if I walked around in a pillow sack," Clarissa informed him as he shifted the basket under one arm, opening the blanket. "I'm sexy in everything." _Mmhm._

He spread the _Angel _blanket (which was a fucking bitch to find online) out on the ground and Clarissa's attention immediately shifted, her lips springing into an amused, giddy, smile.

"There you go," Damon said idly, as though bored, despite his fluttering heartbeat. He was becoming nervous again. He nodded toward the life sized image of Angel on the blanket. "I'm sure you've always wanted to sit on his face."

He was pleased by the revolution that flew across her face, nose scrunching up. "The only face I'm sitting on is _yours_!"

_Fucking_.

Of all the damn things that would come out of her mouth, it was that. Damon's fingers twitched on the basket, eyes sliding down to her as she glowered at the blanket, and he wondered if she _understood _what she said. Clarissa had a tendency to say things without _thinking _about them, and he wasn't that sure how knowledgeable she was of the sexual world.

"How could you even say that? Angel looks like Stefan!"

Damon frowned and turned his head back to the blanket. Squinting, he stepped back a little. Amusement sprang hotly, he suddenly could _see _it. "No matter how hard I try, Stefan just finds way to involve himself in my life."

"It's not gay if it's in a three-way!" Clarissa quipped happily and Damon shoved her forward, irritated.

She shrieked as she flailed forward, landing rather roughly on the ground and rolling onto her back, propping herself up on her elbows and looking up at him. He wondered if she knew how _inviting _she looked as she patted the spot next to her.

"There's enough room on Stefan for the both of us, D," she called in a low voice, a teasing smirk on her face.

"We are _not _calling Angel _Stefan_," Damon huffed, gracefully plopping down next to her, settling the basket down on his other side. Clarissa leaned her face on his arm, grinning up at him.

"At the Founder's party, you said Stefan was _the angel _in this story, so you started it." She batted her eyelashes up at him causing his stomach to twist and tug with nerves. It seemed impossible, but Clarissa became more and more beautiful every time he looked at her.

"You remember that?" _He _hardly remembered that, it was just so insignificant.

"I remember everything you say, D." Clarissa told him softly, earnestly, and Damon let her tug him down with her. He tilted so he leaning over her slightly, propping himself up on one elbow. Her hair was spread out like a dark halo, her hands sliding under his jacket and moving slowly across his chest. Her blue-gray eyes moved across his face. "Damon…" she began, hesitantly.

"Hmmm?" He knew she was on the verge of bringing up something _serious_, it was there in the way she was looking at him. He brushed a few strands of hair from her face, caressing her cheek with the pad of his thumb, in hopes to relax her and coax her into talking.

Clarissa's heart fluttered to his touch, her gaze warm. "I think I'd be alright trying it out—having a three-way. With another girl. Or one of your meals."

Damon released a puff of a chuckle, amused, dragging his hand across her stomach slowly. "_We're _not even having sex yet and you're bringing up threesomes with _other _people…?" Insecurity slammed into him—what if she hadn't been saying that _for his benefit _but her own…? He went still, staring back down at her seriously as she peered up at him, watching his expression carefully, a frown marring her face. "Is that something… you would want to do?"

The idea of it made him _sick_, but if Clarissa _wanted _to explore the sexual side of life—had he really believed that she would be satisfied with only being with _him_…? He didn't know if he would be able to give her that.

Her soft fingers trailed across his jaw slowly, tearing him from his nauseating thoughts. "I would try it for _you_." Her words were a wave of relief, unfreezing his insides, and Damon nuzzled into her palm. "You know I'm only _Damon_-sexual."

"I'm _selfish_," he murmured, brushing his mouth across her palm. "I don't want to share you with _anyone_, Clarissa." He trailed his mouth slowly across her skin, planting small kisses as he made his way down her wrist.

"Damon," she breathed as he continued kissing up her arm, his own name sounding so fucking good coming from her mouth. "I don't… I don't want to change you…" she sounded dazed, clearly having trouble thinking clearly. Damon's lips twitched into a smug smirk against her skin. "I mean—wild vampire sex… it's your thing, and I… I don't want to share you either, but I could—every now and then—threesomes are—I read somewhere that it's actually very…"

Damon sat up, easily pulling her up with him and tugging her onto his lap horizontally. Clarissa gasped in surprise, her fingers splayed across his chest, legs draped across his and hanging off his thigh. He dipped his head, kissing her neck with growing hunger. She tilted her head, giving him better access, a soft sigh of pleasure falling from her lips.

"I didn't even look at another woman for nearly fifty years," he muttered into her skin, trying to keep his fangs from sliding out. Her heart loudly fluttered and he nearly swore. Biting her right now would send everything spiraling, especially with his sense of control nearly gone at this point. "And that was with Katherine locked away in a tomb. _You're _in front of me. If you're worried I might get bored, I _won't_." He lightly nipped her flesh with blunt teeth causing her to moan deliciously. "Consider me strictly _Clary_-sexual."

He tilted his head up as a delighted smile sprinted across her face. Smirking, pleased with himself, he curled an arm around her back, drawing her closer to his chest. His little birdhouse nestled closer as he dragged the basket toward them.

"I've never done this before," she commented on lightly, leaning her head against his, their cheeks touching.

_Called it_.

"That's because you're a poor sheltered rich girl and I'm a big bad vampire about to blow your _mind_." Damon told her pleasantly. "I can open your eyes. Take you wonder by _wonder_. Over, sideways, and under on this magic carpet ride. A whole new _wooorld_," he flipped open the lid to the basket and retrieved the McDonalds bag. "Five star happy meals! Just for _you_."

Her mouth fell open in surprise and Damon realized he had actually done it—he'd shocked her into a dumbfounded silence. One that he hoped was _good_. It was the only thing he _could _do. One up the past by taking her on a date she'd never experienced before, all the while making it as romantic and as cheesy as hell.

"Mmm," he wasn't done either. "And for drinks, blood for me, Pepsi for you," he continued with a smirk, pulling out two _Winnie the Pooh _sippy cups.

Clarissa's snort of amusement rapidly fell into full blown laughter and she was tilting away from him as her body shook with her hysterics. Clutching her stomach, she flipped backwards with a _thawmp_. It was so _gratifying _making her laugh. Like everything surrounding Clarissa, her laughter was bright, wild, and so _happy_.

"Classy as fuck, D." Clarissa grinned widely up at him. "Drinking blood out of a _sippy cup_, oh my God."

Smirking impishly, he leaned over her, tapping her nose. "Mmmhm. The blood belongs to the couple who are responsible for the lights hanging on the trees," he said, gesturing to the fairy lights. "I crashed their date, murdered them in cold blood for the idea, and will now dine on their blood as I romance you."

Amused laughter spilled out as threw her arms around his neck, pulling him down with her. Grinning, Damon nuzzled into the crook of her neck, blissfully enjoying the way she nestled in his arms, her fingers sliding through his hair. It might've been minutes, it could've been hours, time didn't seem to exist anymore when Damon was with her. He was simply so content in laying there with her, listening to her heartbeat, to every breath she took, as she stroked his hair.

"The stars here are so beautiful," Clarissa murmured quietly, awe lacing her tone and Damon shifted so he could see her face. "I think it's the only thing I like about living up here. I remember the first time I saw the night sky outside of the city. I think I might've been six, we were at Barbados."

Damon rolled onto his back, turning his gaze from her wistful pretty face to the dark sky littered with dimly glowing stars. Her hand slid into his, their fingers intertwining.

"It's where I fell in love with the ocean. I stayed exclusively on the beach and the locals there took to watching after me all day. They would make me these baskets out of coconut leaves." Clarissa's voice was soft, a sad happiness lit in her murmur and Damon's gaze slid toward her, watching her relive the memory. "That first night… The moon never looked so beautiful and white and round—and the _stars_. It was so _beautiful_, so magical, I never wanted to look away. It was pure love, looking at that sky. For a long time, nothing could ever compare to it, nothing could ever take my breath away like that, or have me so completely enthralled. When I'd play the piano, it's always what I'd think about. If I ever believed in anything, it was that sky and the vast beauty. It's my second favorite memory."

There wasn't a doubt in his mind, Damon knew he was going to take her back to Barbados. He wanted to be the one to give that piece of happiness back to her, _craved_ to be a part of that new, favorite, memory. Though… if that was her _second _favorite memory…

"What is your _first _favorite memory?" He wondered softly. Whatever it was, he would _top _it. Clarissa tilted her head, eyes dragging from the sky, meeting his with such an intensity that he nearly forgot how to breathe, swept up in the way she lit everything up inside him with a single fond look. Her pretty mouth blossomed into a gentle smile.

"You."

It was cheesy and overly romantic and cliché and Damon knew she _meant _it. His heart stopped inside his chest—_he _was her favorite memory…? Her _favorite_. Damon tried to swallow, his nerves a mess inside him. He had fucking _butterflies_. Warm happiness spread across his chest and through every inch of him as Clarissa's adoring blue-gray gaze cherished him.

"You're my night sky. Dark and endlessly beautiful. You steal my breath away, you leave me in awe. I want to look at you forever." She spoke so sweetly, so passionately, looking at him like _that_, he nearly couldn't take it. "Everything about you embodies the night sky and the sea. I'm the safest, the happiness, near you. You're my favorite everything."

He found that he could only openly gape at her, so struck by her words that he couldn't even _think_. Red burst across her cheeks and she tilted her eyes away, back toward the sky. God, he just needed her eyes on him, needed her to look at him, needed to be swept up in her. He rolled over, hovering over Clarissa. Gently looping his fingers under her chin, Damon guided her head back toward him. Clarissa's gaze was a vast pool of swimming gray and blue, spilling over him, dragging him in. The world around him faded away into a nothingness, only Clarissa _existed_, mattered. She looked at him like he _was _the whole world.

Her heart pattered nervously and his matched her beat.

"You're so beautiful, I nearly can't stand it." Damon murmured softly, stroking her jawline with his thumb. Red drenched her cheeks at the affectionate that coated his quiet voice, and Damon couldn't keep himself at bay. "I'll take you to every damn place on this planet, wherever you want to go, we'll go. We can see the sky from every angle."

Clarissa's gaze tangled with his as her shyness ebbed away. A tiny smile bloomed across her stunning face that made his pulse leap. "Damon," she caressed every letter of his name so sweetly, adoringly, he felt light headed. "I'm the happiest just by being here with _you_. Even if we put glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling, it'd be the same thing to me. Nothing compares to you."

Damon ran his thumb across her lower lip and, unable to help himself, he bent his head, kissing her deeply. He kissed her long, and slow, exploring, mapping every inch of her sweet mouth with his tongue and committing it to memory. Clarissa tilted into him, arms winding around his neck. Her body fit to his comfortably and he drew her closer, curling an arm around her waist, as her tongue gently glided over his. She tasted so fucking _good_. Her fluttering heart danced against his chest, the sound twirling around him.

He was sinking into her, this impossible happiness consuming and sweet. Every second longer he spent in her company, the deeper this euphoric bliss grew inside of him. Clarissa poured every part of herself into each slow, long, kiss, her touches soft and adoring. Every inch of her was _his_ and every inch of him was _hers_, they were so completely one another's that Damon was bursting brightly.

He pulled back just enough so that their foreheads still touched, and Clarissa drew his breath in, as though she was _actually _breathing him in. It was a little habit she had when kissing him, and it caused his lips to spring upward. Leaning forward, he brushed his lips against hers in a quick, soft, kiss and rolled back onto his back, pulling her with him. She snuggled against his chest, curling up happily.

"You should've seen the stars back in eighteen hundreds," he murmured, running his fingers through her soft hair. She tilted her head up, looking at him. "Stef and I used to stargaze a lot when we were both younger. Mother was still alive, then, too. She liked to picnic under the starlight. It was one of the last times we were all together and happy." He paused briefly. "My father had told Stef and I… That the great Kings of the past were up there, watching over us."

He watched as confusion made its way across her face, a frown on her lips. She furrowed her eyebrow, tilting to look at him more. Realization flashed and she sat up and swatting his chest, grinning. "Way to turn the serious, touching, moment about your family into Lion King!"

He merely smirked lazily back at her.

* * *

"Mm, no, this is when I kiss you goodnight and leave," Damon informed his little birdhouse as she peered up at him questioningly, hand on the doorknob. It was nine thirty.

But he wanted to keep it appropriate _first date_ themed, even if the idea of cutting the night short by not going inside with her irritated the shit out of him. Clarissa clearly shared his thought, frowning, and looking so good in his leather jacket. Smirking, he tucked a piece of hair behind her hair and cupped her face in his hands, dipping his head, seeking her sweet little mouth. Clarissa leaned into him, lifting herself on the tips of her toes, curling her fingers in the fabric of his shirt.

She pouted when he stepped back, breaking the kiss, and immediately there was a lingering _need _to appease her. Brat was trying to _Glamour _him. He was starting to pick up on the difference between _his _wanting to give her the whole damn world, and when _she _influenced that. It was like fingertips pressing into his skin, warm and urgent.

"Don't be greedy." Damon teased and she scoffed. "I'll see you tomorrow, sweetcheeks."

It was _stupid _how difficult it was to force himself to leave, especially when she was looking at him the way she was. Her fingers curled around his hand, instantly stopping any movement and he tilted his questioning gaze toward her.

"Thank you," she smiled softly, wrapping her arms around him. "I… really liked the date."

She was going to kill him if she continued making his heart jolt like this, fuck.

"Ooh, lucky me, sounds like this is going to lead up to a _second _date," Damon said playfully, trying to slow his heart down. "We can picnic under the stars on the beach of Barbados."

She laughed, arms dropping from around him, only to stop when her eyes met his. He must've been staring at her too seriously, too affectionately, because her breath caught.

"You can wear that sexy itsy-bitsy bikini," he continued, smirking, as her eyes widened.

"We're not going to Barbados as a second date." If Clarissa thought she could tell him where he _could _or _couldn't _take her, she was going to be in for a surprise. He merely smirked darkly and she sputtered as he slunk off the porch. "_Damon_," she hissed after him. "I'm friggin' serious!"

His laughter was her only response.

* * *

"_WILD THING! YOU MAKE MY HEART SING! YOU MAKE EVERYTHIN'… GROOVY! WILD THIIIING!_"

Stefan released a sigh as the next song started up, blaring through the entire boarding house loud enough that the walls rattled. He was pretty sure it was _The Troggs_, too, a band Stefan never really enjoyed. All night, music from the late fifties to mid-sixties had been blaring. _All night_. Green eyes flickered toward the digital alarm clock across the room. It was _one in the morning_. What was Damon doing…? It was a good thing Zach "went on vacation suddenly" (was buried somewhere in Mystic Falls), otherwise he was sure this would drive his poor nephew into snapping. Only the dead knew peace from Damon's madness.

With another sigh, he put down the book he'd been reading and decided to go find his brother. It didn't take very long, all he had to do was follow the sound of Damon belting along to the music.

"But I wanna knooow fooooor suuuureee!" Damon's sang along happily, his voice becoming louder as Stefan followed the winding hallway. "So come on and hold me tiiiiight! You _move me_!"

Damon was clearly sober, up a fifty foot ladder in the middle of the hallway, swaying his hips as he fiddled with something on the ceiling.

"How many vampires does it take to change a light bulb?" Stefan wondered sarcastically, gaining Damon's attention just as—oh _lord_, the Everly Brothers'_ Till I Kissed You _began playing. It was as though his brother had complied the worst love songs from that decade and decided to torture Stefan with them.

"Ha _ha_. Very funny. I'm gluing glow-and-the-dark stars to the ceiling," Damon answered back with a scoff, as though that was a perfectly normal thing to do at one in the morning. Or in general. Stefan furrowed his brow, confused.

"You couldn't find better music to do that to?" Stefan felt like he'd stumbled into some kind of Twilight Zone. Had it only been a few short weeks ago that they could hardly be in the same room as one another, let alone speak civilly? And now, all at once, they were on their way to being _brothers _again.

"What's wrong with The Everly Brothers?" Damon demanded with a huff. "I think their music is very relatable."

As if on cue, the second part of the chorus kicked up with: "_You. Don't. Reaaal-izeee what you do to meeee! And I didn't realize what a kiss could beeee! Mmmm, ya got a waaay 'bout ya! Now I can't live without ya! Never knew what I missed 'til I kissed ya!_"

Stefan wasn't sure which was more nauseating, a smitten Damon or Damon pretending he had no humanity. "If _Big Bopper_ starts playing, I'm smashing the stereo."

"I'm sorry, should I be listening to Bob Dylan mumble on while playing the same flat tune on his guitar? Maybe if I listen hard enough, I'll be able to understand what the _hell _he's saying—"

Stefan's foot _accidentally_ kicked in the leg of the ladder. He watched in amusement as the entire thing swayed, Damon swearing loudly as he fell in a blur of dark colors, hitting the ground with a sickening _THAWK_. Biting back a grin, Stefan tilted his head to peer down at Damon, who was moaning in pain, rolling across the floor.

"You okay?" His attempt to sound concerned failed and Damon's blue eyes squinted back up at him, face crinkled in pain.

"What the hell was that for?" Damon demanded in a groan, rubbing the back of his head.

Shifting a shoulder upward into a casual shrug, Stefan offered his brother a hand. "You're an asshole."

Blue met green and the two brothers stared awkwardly at one another, silently assessing the other for a full minute until Damon's gaze fell down to Stefan's offered hand briefly. Tilting his gaze back up to meet Stefan's, Damon's lips tugged upward into a smirk and he leaned forward, firmly taking the offered hand.

As Stefan helped Damon back to his feet, Damon chimed with a playful, "Next time I'll remember to be more sensitive about your shitty music, baby bro. But you know the rules, no rough housing inside."

* * *

Sunday, October 10th  
Girl Talk & Mentally Scarring Younger Brothers

* * *

Emily's grimoire and talisman lay forgotten as the two best friends sat on the bed. Elena had her knees to her chest, Bonnie sitting cross legged next to her, a sympathetic look on her face.

"It's like it doesn't even _matter _to Clare…" Elena continued, blinking back a few tears that had formed again and Bonnie felt her heart twist for her best friend. "I know that we're in the middle of all this… this crazy stuff with _vampires _and… whatever I am and whatever she is—but… we're _adopted_." Elena's dark eyes squeezed shut as she pushed her hair back.

Bonnie's head was still spinning from everything Elena had just told her, and it was obvious that a lot of tension had rolled off her now that Bonnie was _in the know_. It was still difficult to picture the two Salvatore brothers as _vampires_, even more so, the continued proof that Bonnie _was _a witch. Something, which, she had been trying to deny despite her and Gram's serious talk and the terrifying evidence.

But right now, none of that supernatural stuff _mattered_. Right now, her best friend was struggling with coming to terms with being adopted. Bonnie knew that Clare had a tendency to land bombshells on people without thinking much of the consequences, however she couldn't help but agree with Clare's firm stance of not giving a damn.

"You're still Elena Gilbert, Jeremy is still your little brother, and they are and always will be _your parents_," Bonnie said firmly, bumping her shoulder with Elena's. "Nothing has changed." Elena still looked gloomy and opened her mouth, but Bonnie cut her off. "They were going to tell you. And put yourself in Jenna's shoes, how is she supposed to tell you that right after they died? Clare isn't caring because she's being _spastic_, she's not caring because there is nothing to _care_ about."

Elena's lips tugged down into a pouty frown and she cast Bonnie a look, but there was a spark of relief in her dark eyes. Maybe all she needed was to hear it from someone sensible. "You're _my _best friend, you're supposed to agree with _me_."

"I'm _your _best friend, I'm _supposed_ to talk smack about Stefan dating you after dating someone who looks _exactly like you_." Bonnie shot back, giving Elena a _look_. Elena snorted. "How the hell am I supposed to be catty and say she's ugly? When she comes out of that tomb, she's _going _to look like shit. There. I feel better."

Elena laughed and the two moved onto less serious topics.

* * *

Stefan had never regretted anything more in his entire existence than this very moment when he had made the horrific decision to enter the kitchen. He froze at the scene that was laid out before him.

Clare was wearing—he wasn't really sure _what_ she was wearing, it was some kind little girl's sailor dress with lots of frills and lace and looked like it belonged in a strange porno rather than on her! And _Damon_—Damon was wearing some sort of lacey black collar with a large bell attached and… were those… clip on kitty ears? In his mess of dark hair were _kitty ears_!

Blue eyes snapped in his direction, widening almost comically. "Stef—"

Clare tugged sharply on what appeared to look like a leather leash, drawing Damon's face closer to hers, reclaiming his gaze. Damon's head was tilted slightly, blue eyes smoldering, his stance so submissive he was nearly unrecognizable.

Stefan was freaked out beyond belief, he just stumbled into a scene he would never be able to _un_see.

"I didn't say you could _speak_." Clare said in a low, commanding, voice, and Stefan watched in disgusted horror as the two locked in a stare laced with such heavy sexual tension that he nearly threw up in his mouth. "I'm going to have to punish you, _Kitten_."

Stefan bolted from the kitchen. He was going to need years and years of intense therapy before ever feeling somewhat normal _ever_ again.

* * *

Monday, October 11th  
Vervain Coffee & Bronies & Werewolf Experts

* * *

"What are you doing?" Jeremy asked with a yawn, leaning against the island as Clare bounced around the kitchen, the pot of coffee in hand. If she was going to drink coffee, Jeremy wanted to know now so he could walk to school, rather be subjected to the spastic madness that would surely ensure being stuck in a car with her.

He loved his sister, he really did, but that didn't mean he could handle her all the time.

"Making a cup of coffee for Alaric." His sister replied happily, pouring the coffee into a large styrofoam cup. Jeremy opened his mouth, shocked, just as Elena, who was watching in amusement, shook her head.

"No, he's not here, if that's what you're thinking," Elena informed him, raising her mug to her lips. Then what the hell was she making him coffee for if he wasn't even _here_…?

She was going to _bring _it to him?

"You're sucking up to the history teacher?" Jeremy wondered with a frown, puzzled. Since when did Clare give a damn about that sort of stuff? Especially since she could _Glamour_?

"It's 'from Jenna'." Elena explained using air quotes. Oh _jeez_.

"You're really set on getting them together, huh?" Jeremy and Elena shared a look. Once Clare got something in her mind, it was difficult to deter her.

"They're her _OTP_." Elena shrugged and Jeremy shook his head.

"You can't ship people in real life, that's weird."

Clare pulled out a vial, scoffing, not looking at either of them. "If he _thinks _it's from Jenna, he's more likely to drink it. Plus I'm gonna Glamour him into wanting to."

"So you're poisoning him?" Elena asked, confused, as Clare dumped the clear liquid into the coffee, stirring it.

"That's vervain." Jeremy realized, feeling a lot more awake suddenly. "You're spiking his coffee with _vervain_? Why? He's not a vampire, C."

Clare raised the coffee up in front of her, as though inspecting her work, amusement loud on her face. "We're protecting him."

"Against _what_?" What the hell was Clare talking about? Protecting him? They hardly _knew _him!

"Damon?" Elena guessed.

"From _all_ vampires." Clare said happily.

Jeremy and Elena glanced at each other with the same knowing look, a silent mutual agreement to keep an _eye _on Clare passing between them. When it came to Alaric, Clare got a little… _funny_. Jeremy had never seen her instantly take to someone like she did with Alaric. Which was actually really weird. Especially since he smacked her in the face with a door. Accident or not, she normally would've taken offense to that. And with the whole supernatural world coming into play, Jeremy _knew _for a damn fact that she would be hesitant about Alaric rather than so accepting. _Trust no one_, that's what she had said.

"Do you feel like you have to make him a part of our lives because he was… married to our birth mom?" Elena stumbled over the question awkwardly and Clare finally glanced over to them, staring at Elena oddly.

"That woman has nothing to do with our life, Laney." Clare stated flatly, irritation flashing across her face. "Don't even consider her our _birth mom_. She's just Isobel. Okaaay! Let's get going, I wanna give Alaric the coffee before class starts!"

* * *

"But why?" Jeremy pressed, eyeing Clare as she impatiently shifted her weight between her feet. They were standing some feet away from the entrance of the school, Elena having gone off to find Stefan.

"I don't know," Clare muttered back distractedly. "Because we have to."

_Because we _have _to_? That was her reason for wanting to protect Alaric?

"Why?"

She threw him an aggravated look, opening her mouth to snap something out, when she brightened suddenly. "A-Ric!"

Said history teacher was just passing them by and slowed to a stop, grinning warmly. Jeremy had to admit the guy seemed alright, but that didn't mean he suddenly wanted him as his new _father figure_ or anything.

"Morning, Gilberts." Alaric greeted sleepily.

"Jenna made you coffee," Clare gushed happily, presenting the cup to him and he shot her a _look_, taking it from her.

"What did I say about trying to set me up with your aunt? It's _weird_." Alaric wasn't buying her shit and Jeremy released a laugh, amused.

"I said the _same _thing." Jeremy said and Alaric shook his head, grinning, as Clare scoffed.

"Thanks, though." Alaric raised the cup as though to toast them. He took a sip, made a face, and gave Clare another look. "If this is going to become habit, not that I'm _encouraging _it, I like my coffee black."

"Okie-dokie." Clare deadpanned. "Just remember, a coffee a day keeps the bloodsuckers away." _What the hell!_ She was _telling _him?

Alaric faltered just slightly, a look of consideration passing across his face as he turned to glance back at them. The very moment he stepped through the doors, Jeremy punched his sister on the arm.

"Ouch, J!" She whined unhappily, rubbing the spot he struck. She was being dramatic, he didn't even hit her that hard. "What was that for?"

"You know what that was for!"

* * *

Anna: _going to the midnight release?_

Jeremy's lips twitched upward into a grin at the text and replied: _dunno mybe. you p-ordered uncharted?_

It had been… God, six months? Maybe a little bit longer? Since Jeremy had gone to a midnight release for a game. That was something he and dad would do, and Jeremy wasn't sure if he wanted to continue the tradition. …But seeing Anna would be kind of cool.

Jeremy released a (totally dignified and manly) shriek upon entering his room and finding two vampires already inside. Damon was idly spinning in his computer chair and Stefan was sitting on the floor, playing on his xbox. The confused, irritated, shock flooded over the initial jolting surprise and Jeremy shut the door, frowning.

"What are you guys doing here?"

"We're waiting for you to play with us, Jerbear." Damon intoned sarcastically, swirling the chair to face him, looking bored. "It's not polite to invite us over and ignore us all day. We're your vampires."

What the hell was Damon talking about?

"I didn't invite you over." Jeremy pointed out, dropping his bag to the floor and Damon gasped, placing a hand over his chest. "Clare's researching?" What could she possibly be researching? Werewolves? The Lockwoods?

The blue eyed vampire scoffed. "Why are you so against us hanging out?" That meant _yes_. "Where have you been?" He added in a demand, as though Jeremy being out was the biggest offense.

"I was at my friend's house." Jeremy said with a shrug, throwing himself down on the bed, bouncing a little. He glanced over to Stefan who appeared to be oblivious to everything but Gears of War.

"You have _friends_?" Damon asked, sounding honestly surprised, and Jeremy rolled his eyes. Dick.

He had about three friends left after—well, after the whole _drug _saga of his life. Three friends who were willing to understand and forgive all the shit he had put them through. They just so happened to be his… _nerdiest_ three friends.

"So I get why _you're_ here," Jeremy said, choosing to ignore Damon's rude ass comment. "Cockblocked by information has to _suck_, but I don't get why _he's _here."

Damon waved a hand about airily. "Stef needs some male bonding. He's only been in the company of girls for the last hundred and forty-five years. He needs to man up a little, be less of a sensitive pushover."

"Keep telling him that, _kitten_." Stefan deadpanned and Jeremy watched with growing interest as Damon _flushed_. An angry pink hue spread across his cheeks and he squinted his blue eyes angrily.

"Stefan has an addictive personality." Damon switched the subject and Jeremy's eyebrows rose as the vampire flat out refused to look in the younger Salvatore's direction. "That's why he's in here, playing the video games. _Addicted_. It's a problem. He may go on killing sprees if he doesn't get to play some xbox every day."

Stefan paused the game and tilted his eyes toward Damon who growled threateningly. With a smirk, Stefan turned to Jeremy. "You should ask Damon the weird things he likes to dress up as in his spare time."

"You weren't supposed to see that." Damon snapped. "That was private."

Jeremy snorted. "If you tell me you're secretly a brony, I'm going to throw myself out the window." Jeremy wasn't kidding either. "My friend just came out of the stable to me."

Stefan and Damon both stared at him like he was nuts, Stefan's eyebrows furrowed as Damon outright made a face.

"What the hell are you talking about?" The eldest vampire demanded irritably.

"Brony?" Stefan repeated the name, confused. _Oh God_.

"Google it." Jeremy suggested with a smirk. Damon held his stare for a solid thirty seconds before he dropped his legs from resting on top of the computer tower and swirled the chair around. Stefan was hovering over his shoulder instantly.

Google Images was about to taint them with more darkness than a hundred and forty-five years of being vampires.

Neither vampire said anything after a stretch of silence so Jeremy decided to elaborate.

"There's this cartoon for little girls called My Little Pony. Bronies are guys who love the ponies and usually dress up like them." Or something. Honestly, Jeremy wasn't too clear as it was. But he promised to support his friend as long as he didn't tell Jeremy any of the details.

"_What_?" Damon and Stefan turned around, staring at Jeremy with various incredulous looks of horror and confusion. They glanced at each other and then turned back to the computer, fighting over the keyboard.

"The world is going to hell," Stefan was saying as Damon smacked his hands away.

"Yes, and I'm _so glad _you made us immortal, Stef, really, thanks for that. I'm glad I get to see Bronies." Damon agreed with mock cheerfulness. "I can't _wait _to see what the horrible future holds if this is the present!"

"It can't be worse than what _you _were doing." Stefan shot back.

"I'm googling it! Let's _see_! Let's see what they'd wear!"

Jeremy hopped off the bed, he _needed _to see this. Eventually Stefan had wrestled the keyboard from Damon and the three of them leaned closer to the computer screen. Stefan had found something called _Rainbow Dash _footie pajamas for grown men. It was blue with a rainbow tail, a hood with cartoon eyes and a rainbow mane.

"I…" Damon was, for the first time (that Jeremy had witnessed), completely and utterly speechless, his mouth falling open.

"Well…" Jeremy cleared his throat. "Some people take this… Uh, really seriously."

"Is this a _sexual _thing?" Stefan tilted his head, staring in bewilderment. "Are they… sexually attracted to little girl ponies?"

"I would assume that's why it's called _coming out of the stable_, but I don't know. I don't think my friend is into it in a sexual way." If he was, Jeremy really, seriously, didn't want to know. Not because he was _against _bronies, but because he didn't want to hear about _anyone's _sexual fetishes.

"Should we buy it?" Stefan asked quietly causing Damon and Jeremy to snap their heads toward him. The younger vampire smirked, green eyes lit with a playful mischief. "Cat, pony, they're the same thing, right?"

A growl erupted from Damon's throat and Jeremy wondered how the hell the cat thing got passed onto Damon. _Stefan _had been the butt of the cat jokes between them last Friday. But Jeremy _didn't want to know_, and so didn't ask.

"I think you'd rock the look, Stefan." Jeremy didn't know why he felt the need to have Damon's back, and the words were out of his mouth before he could even think about them.

Damon's lips twitched into a smirk and Jeremy knew, somehow, he was going to regret even saying anything. He was dealing with two obviously very bored vampires.

"Whoever can get Clary to react consciously wins." Damon said with a smirk, after a few minutes of the two shooting insults back and forth at each other. "And the loser wears the PJs, in public, for an hour."

"Fine. Rules?" Stefan agreed flatly.

Yeah. These vampires were in serious need for a life. But Jeremy was kind of bored too, and life was becoming more and more entertaining.

"We don't touch her laptop or physically move her."

Stefan had no idea what he just signed up for, he had _no idea _what Clare was like when she was researching.

He followed the two vampires into his sister's room, debating whether or not if he should bring a snack. This was going to take a while.

Clare was sitting cross legged on her bed, back against the headboard, hair up in a messy bun. Poe was sitting next to her, a bowl of sunflower seeds in front of him. Damon shot the bird an odd look.

"Yeah, he sticks around even when you're not controlling him." Jeremy informed him.

"She needs a real pet." It was a good thing that Clare wasn't _around _to hear him say that, because Jeremy was sure if she did, this time tomorrow every animal considered to be a 'pet' would be in this house.

Jeremy didn't trust Damon to be able to deny Clare for a long stretch of time. "Good luck." He said to the two vampires, plopping down on the stool in front of the vanity.

"Clare," Stefan leaned closer to the oblivious girl. "I'm going to eat Poe."

No reaction.

* * *

"Claryberry!" Damon bounced up onto the bed, jumping around. Clare tilted over slightly only to right herself. "Clary, Clary, Clary!"

No reaction.

* * *

"Oh God!" Stefan cried as a brown owl came bursting into the room. Jeremy guessed controlling animals wasn't a strictly-Damon talent. "They delivered Bonnie's letter from Hogwarts to the wrong house!"

No reaction.

* * *

"_OUCH DAMON YOU PSYCHO_!" Jeremy burst out angrily, smacking the vampire away from him. "You weren't supposed to actually bite me!"

"It had to be believable," Damon rolled his eyes like Jeremy was _overreacting_! He wasn't overreacting! Jeremy threw him an angry look, pushing down his shirt to look at the bite mark on his shoulder.

"Gross!"

"You're not even bleeding."

"Clare, your freakin' boyfriend bit me! I'm pretty sure that's sexua—"

"Oh, Jerbear!" Damon pounced, tackling Jeremy to the ground with a loud _THUD_. "I can't contain my feelings!"

"Stefan, get him off me!"

No reaction from Clare.

* * *

"Look, Clare!" Stefan leaned into her space, a cupcake in hand. "It's a—"

The oblivious girl snatched the offered cupcake from his hand so quickly it was almost inhuman and stuffed the entire thing, wrapper included, into her mouth. Stefan cringed as she pulled the half chewed, wet, wrapper from her mouth and tossed it to the side of her bed carelessly.

* * *

"Clary…" Damon began seriously. "This just got Defan."

Stefan snapped his head around to Damon as Jeremy raised his eyebrows. This just got…? Damon, smirking, turned on his heels, throwing Stefan into a hug. The younger Salvatore flailed and the two crashed loudly into the dresser.

"_Damon_!"

"It's more than brotherly love! I can't keep my tortured soul from loving you in a twisted, perverted, way, Stefan! I've tried! But I cannot resist you!"

Jeremy lost control and broke out laughing as Stefan, face twisted in disgust, attempted to shove Damon from him.

Clare was oblivious as ever.

* * *

Clare's closet doors burst open and Stefan strutted out dramatically, tossing a scarf over his shoulder. "You're right, Clare, I _am _gay."

No reaction.

* * *

"We'll bang, okay?" Damon said loudly, pulling his shirt off and placing his hands on his hips as though _presenting _himself.

No reaction.

* * *

"Clare, do you want a puppy?" Stefan asked with forced enthusiasm.

No reaction.

* * *

"Look, Clary!" Damon demanded, juggling knives.

No reaction.

* * *

"What are they doing?" Elena wondered, standing next to the very amused Jeremy, the two of them watching Damon and Stefan make fools out of themselves.

"Trying to get Clare to respond." Jeremy explained with a smirk. "They're in a bet. The loser has to dress up like a brony."

Elena opened her mouth and then closed it, clearly deciding it was best if she _didn't _know what a brony was. Instead she walked over to Clare and sat down next to her, dark eyes tilting toward the screen.

"Researching what?" Elena asked and Clare's gaze unfocused a bit before she turned her head toward Elena with a small shrug.

What the hell?

"Werewolves and whether or not the gene can be passed onto offspring and if the curse has to be triggered." Clare explained happily and Elena grinned in triumph. Clare turned back to the computer.

"How'd you know to do that?" Jeremy was kind of impressed.

"Well fuck." Damon muttered, eyeing Elena as Stefan groaned.

"We're _twins_," Elena said with a smirk, sliding off the bed. "When Clare gets like this, she's still _kind of _listening. She picks up keywords, and she loves talking about whatever she's doing." Elena made her way toward the door and turned, grinning. "Now you _both _have to dress like bronies. Have fun." She was obviously still upset at Stefan for keeping the Katherine thing from her.

Damon and Stefan watched Elena go, both looking flabbergasted, and Jeremy pulled his phone out to read Anna's text.

Anna: _might show up if you're going (:_

Jeremy grinned, glancing up to the two vampires. "We'll check out the mall for the PJs. I have to pick up Uncharted 2 at midnight anyway."

Damon threw him a dark look. "I'm not a taxi service."

Not two minutes later, Jeremy was sitting in the passenger seat. He knew Damon and Stefan were still a little rocky with their brotherly relationship, but it made him feel kind of cool sitting in the front while Stefan sat in the back. Made him feel like he was on equal ground with Damon.

"What's with all the candy?" Stefan wondered as Jeremy played with the radio, searching for something good to listen to. "There's three giant bags of skittles back here."

"It's kay, I'm dating a Fae." Damon dismissed, leaning across Jeremy to open the glove compartment, where he retrieved one of the many packages of _pixie sticks_. Jeez.

"I think you just want some Rainbow Dash in your mouth." Jeremy quipped as _Queen _hummed from the speakers, watching as Damon tilted his head back and downed an entire red pixie stick.

"Taste the rainbow, Damon." Stefan smirked and Jeremy lifted his fist, tapping his knuckles against Stefan's. Damon rolled his eyes and tore open the next pixie stick.

"To quote, shut your whore mouth Steffy, or I'll kill us." Damon threatened but it was difficult to take the vampire seriously, especially with the pink pixie stick hanging out of his mouth.

"Daaaamon, just killed a man," Stefan sang along teasingly to _Queen_.

"Put his mouth by his head," Jeremy added, playing along, the two of them smirking at an annoyed Damon. "Sank his fangs in, now he's dead!"

"Damoooon! Life had just begun! But now he's gone and thrown it aaaalll awaaaay! Daaaamooon!"

"Oooh!"

"Didn't mean to make you cry! If he's not back again this time tomorroooow…"

"You two should be professional singers," Damon shot sarcastically. "Duet together, tour the country."

"Carry on, carry on!" Jeremy and Stefan chimed. "As if nothing really matters!"

* * *

Hot Topic wasn't what it used to be, or maybe Jeremy just remembered it differently from when he was younger and a friend dared him to go inside. He remembered it being a dark, strange, place with scary teens dressed in chains and dyed mohawks, while a demonic voice screeched from hidden speakers. Now there was nothing scary or dark about the brightly lit store that sold overpriced merch and whatever cartoon character was _in_ these days. Pokémon was apparently _really_ cool again.

"What about this?" Stefan joked, holding up a brightly colored rainbow tutu to Damon's waist. Jeremy figured it might've been three inches long and if worn would leave nothing to the imagination. "I think you'd look really good."

Jeremy snorted.

The blue eyed vampire tilted his head in mock consideration, looking down at the tutu, popping a few skittles into his mouth. "Mmm. I look good in everything." _Sure_.

"I think you should wear it with the hoodie." Jeremy suggested with a grin, nodding toward the light blue hoodie with large cartoon eyes on the front. "Since you're Rainbow Dash."

"Taste the rainbow, become the rainbow." Stefan deadpanned.

"The skittle-brony jokes are getting stale." Damon scoffed, tearing the tutu from Stefan's hand.

"Nope, I think they're still funny as hell," Jeremy said with a grin, laughing as Damon lightly punched him on the arm.

"Neither one of you are going to be laughing when I wear the tutu and I'm sexy as hell." Damon was such an arrogant dick. Jeremy and Stefan exchanged amused glances as the older vampire tore the hoodie off the rake and cringed. "It has _wings_!" He flipped the hood up which had a bright rainbow mane and ears, his face scrunching up with displeasure. After a moment, he sent Jeremy and Stefan (both of who were sniggering) leveled glares. "I'm still going to look better than _you_."

As Damon stomped off to the cashier, Stefan turned to Jeremy, "Now Damon will be a glorious winged pony. What he always wanted."

"I don't think those wings can support his ego." Jeremy grinned.

"I can hear you assholes," Damon called across the store. "These wings _will _support me and my dreams, unlike you shitheads!"

* * *

"You need to flip the hood up," Stefan said as Damon zipped up the hoodie, looking more like a cat that just crawled out of a pool than anything. Jeremy tugged on the blue wings in the back and the older vampire turned, slapping his hands away.

"Get in the tutu." Jeremy demanded with a smirk. Damon shot him a look but there was a spark of amusement in his blue gaze. Acting as though it was the biggest hassle, he sighed and pulled the tutu out of the Hot Topic bag which he then slammed against Jeremy's chest. "Dick."

"Feeling shy?" Stefan asked as Damon wiggled the tutu up his legs.

"As much as I know you two are _dying _to see my junk, I don't think Clary would appreciate it if I pranced around with everything out on full display." Damon retorted sarcastically and Jeremy burst out laughing, unable to keep himself at bay, seeing Damon standing there with the tutu around his waist, wearing that ridiculous hoodie.

While it _was _true that Damon could pull the look off better than anyone else, the fact that this was a _vampire_, who had no issue with even killing _Clare_, made it a lot funnier to him. Stefan was soon laughing with him and their amusement bounced off each other's until Jeremy actually had to sit down from laughing so hard and Stefan was bent over.

Instead of becoming offended, Damon merely smirked darkly at them.

* * *

"Gonna tear your throat out," Damon said cheerfully, flashing a wicked grin at Jeremy, before disappearing behind the large candy stand. "Drink _all _your blood."

"I'm just saying," Jeremy shrugged a shoulder, completely unaffected by the threat. "I think you're developing a problem."

"Stef, try the Redbull." Damon said happily as he snatched a few packets of _sour patch kids_ from the shelf. "Too bad you're doing the animal diet. Redbull and blood is such a _kick_."

Stefan raised his eyebrows. "When did you—wait, never mind. I don't want to know. I thought you weren't feeding from humans anymore." _Other than Clare_.

"This was before when we went to New York." Because that made it so much better. "It was Claryberry's idea." It was remarkable how _proud _Damon sounded. Jeremy was sure if Clare turned into a vampire and went on a killing spree, Damon would pat her on the head saying 'my adorable fairy vampire, doing cute little killing sprees!'

"Of course it was," Jeremy and Stefan sighed at the same time.

"But seriously… You might want to slow down with the sugary stuff, it'd suck if your fangs got a cavity. I don't think any dentist will want to help you out." Jeremy said, half teasing.

"Who cares about free will when Damon can compel?" Stefan brought up sarcastically and Damon rolled his eyes.

"I'm not going to get cavities."

* * *

Unfortunately for Stefan, the Rainbow Dash footie pajamas were right in the front of Spencer's.

"Do you think he's picking at the wall with a spoon, trying to tunnel his way out of the bathroom to make his escape?" Jeremy wondered, the two of them leaning against the wall outside of the restrooms, causing Damon to snort.

"Stef, hurry your ass up." Damon demanded lightly, popping a few sour patch kids into his mouth. He offered the bag to Jeremy who shook his head, refusing. "He just called us dicks."

"Tough love, Stefan." Jeremy shrugged, watching the same three giggling girls walk by. It was odd, because not only had they been eyeing Damon but they were eyeing _him _too.

Damon was either so far used to being ogled at that he didn't notice anymore, or he honestly just didn't _care_. But it was new for Jeremy, and he couldn't help but feel a little pleased by it. By their fourth time passing by, the prettiest of the three, a blonde with freckles, decided to venture over, her giggling friends loud a few feet away.

This literally had never happened to Jeremy.

_How was he supposed to act_?

Act _cool_.

Whatever that _meant_.

"Um," the girl said with a giggle, gaining Damon's attention. He smirked down at her, his entire demeanor immediately becoming flirty. Jeremy wondered if he would ever be able to look _that cool_. "We like your tutu."

Damon slung an arm over Jeremy's shoulders, tugging him closer. "Thanks, my boyfriend just got it for me."

_What the hell_? Jeremy snapped his head around to give Damon a look, annoyed. What the hell was Damon _doing_?

"Awww!" The girls giggled as the blonde's smile softened.

"You guys are so cute," the girl gushed and Damon nuzzled into Jeremy's neck. _Goddamn it_. "How long have you been together?"

"We're not together!" Jeremy insisted with a growl.

"Time is meaningless when we're together." Damon stated passionately, sounding like he _really _meant it and Jeremy attempted to wiggle away from the obviously unstable vampire. The sugar had clearly gone to his head. "Our love is forever and endless!"

"Damon!"

As soon as the giggling girls walked away, cooing and waving, Damon released Jeremy who flailed backwards, face pink and annoyed. The vampire merely smirked at him.

"I know _you're _taken, but you didn't have to make me seem gay!" Jeremy huffed, straightening his shirt.

"Mm, I was under the impression you had a thing for Hot Gamer Girl." Damon shrugged a shoulder, disinterested, as he popped a few more sour patch kids into his mouth. Hot Gamer—? Jeremy sputtered.

"Clare told you about Anna?" Of _course _she did! "I hardly know her! Clare has to stop _shipping _people, it's weird!"

Damon smirked. "I'm writing a fanfic. _Besides_," he raised—was that… was that his _cellphone_? When did Damon get a hold of his _cellphone_? "Can't wait to see you later Anna. Smiley face. Mmmhm, I know why you're _really _here."

Jeremy snatched the phone from the smirking vampire, cheeks warm. "We text a little, so what?"

"_So _there's a hot girl your age who likes what you like." Damon raised his eyebrows. "_Do _something about it. Don't be a dick. If you're not interested, make it clear. 'Cause you text her like you 'dig' her."

Jeremy shoved his phone back into his pocket, not knowing what to say. Damon tended to spout out advice randomly and sometimes Jeremy didn't know how to take it, or how to handle it. Sometimes it made him miss his Dad a little, and other times… it made him feel kind of good. _Kind of important_. Like someone gave a damn about him.

"Do I really have to walk around like this?" Stefan's voice cut in and Jeremy turned just as Damon choked on his sour patch kids.

Stefan looked _hilarious _in the footie pajamas. Like an oversized baby.

Jeremy fell backwards into the wall as his laughter consumed him, Damon over his choking fit and laughing just as loudly. The two of them slid down the wall.

"This stays between us." Stefan said lowly. "We take it to our graves."

"Yeah us and everybody else in the mall!" Jeremy howled with laughter.

"We're going to kill all the witnesses." Stefan said firmly. "Nobody leaves the mall alive."

* * *

Jeremy had agreed if Stefan treated them to _Johnny Rockets _he could take the footie pajamas off afterwards. It wasn't that he was selling out, they _had _agreed only an hour, and he was _seriously _hungry.

"And what would you like, sweetie?" The waitress asked Stefan kindly causing Jeremy to erupt into laughter again. Stefan smiled sarcastically.

"A rocket single with a coke." He paused. "And… cheese fries."

"Can we get a giant plate of cheese fries?" Jeremy asked as he calmed down and the waitress blinked, a frown on her face. He guessed she realized Stefan was just an asshole in a suit and not _special needs_.

"Of course." The waitress said with a smile, turning her eyes toward Damon. "And for you?"

"Just a strawberry milkshake, doll," Damon's grin was flirty and Stefan turned his head to give his brother a look as the waitress pranced away.

"A milkshake? _Really_?" Stefan arched a single eyebrow, but Jeremy couldn't take him seriously wearing what he was.

Damon clearly had a sugar addiction problem. Maybe it was a Salvatore trait to become easily addicted to things.

The older vampire shifted a shoulder upward, pulling out a bag of M&M's that Stefan snatched from him and tossed across the table at Jeremy. "My Claryberry devours _excessive_ amounts of sugar."

As if _that_ explained his addiction.

"I'm pretty sure she's consumed more sugar than the worst you and I have ever been combined when it comes to draining people of blood." Damon stated seriously with an eye roll when he noticed the way Jeremy and Stefan were staring at him. "What can I say? She tastes a lot like sweets, I'm kinda hooked."

…But Jeremy kind of got the feeling that Damon was just eating so much sugary crap because he _missed _her. Jeremy didn't know why it always threw him for a moment when Damon openly expressed his fondness for Clare. His entire attitude and demeanor changed, shifted. Damon was loudly, proudly, in love, or _whatever_, with Clare, he wanted the _whole world _to know that they belonged to each other. Jeremy might've been a little bit jealous.

If he could have just a fraction of what they had with someone, he'd be happy. It was different with Stefan and Elena, they had this old soul love going on, this quiet romance where they were just happy, surrounded by a blanket of fuzzy feelings and warmth. When Jeremy looked at them, they just seemed to _belong _together, like they were soulmates of many, many lifetimes over and they were finally back together.

But Damon and Clare… They were like the grand finale of fireworks that was never going to end, each rocket igniting another. They clearly cherished every second they spent in each other's company, like at any moment it would be their last. Sometimes Jeremy got the impression that they were holding their breathes until they were together again.

He wanted that.

He wanted to be that passionate about someone, wanted them to be just as passionate in return.

Stefan's groan tugged Jeremy's from his thoughts. "Do _not _turn her," he was saying. "Damon, I'm serious."

"If you turn Clare, you have to turn me too." Jeremy said immediately and realized, with slight surprise, that he was _sort of serious_. Hey, if his sister was going to live forever, then Jeremy should live forever too.

Damon snorted as the waitress returned with a large plate of cheese fries. "I don't have to do jackshit." Jeremy raised his eyebrows back at that vampire.

Clare would want him immortal. And Damon couldn't say _no _to Clare. He could scoff all he wanted, but he was _turning _Jeremy.

"Nobody is turning anyone." Stefan said flatly, shaking his head, as he munched on a few fries.

"You're turning me. You have to. Family sticks together, and it's what Clare would want." Jeremy said smugly as Damon scowled back at him. "How horrible is the transition? Am I going to have to miss school due to my inability to control my bloodlust?"

"You're not being turned." Stefan repeated with a frown. "It's not happening."

"Aw, c'mon, Steffy," Damon grinned sarcastically, nudging his brother with an elbow. "Haven't you always wanted a kid brother and sister?" Jeremy's eyebrows shot up as Stefan rolled his eyes.

"Are you saying you're going to marry my sister?" Jeremy had wanted to make Damon uncomfortable. Instead the vampire smirked haughtily.

"He's talking out of his ass," Stefan flicked a fry at Damon who batted it away, offended. "He's at that stage where he's writing 'C + D 5-EVER' in hearts on his notebooks."

Jeremy snorted with laughter as his phone went off. Of course it was Clare. To be nice (though both vampires would've been able to hear her just fine), Jeremy put the phone on speaker and set it down on the table.

"What's up, C?"

"_Hey the guys you game with are from California, right?_" Clare sounded half distracted and at the sound of her voice, Jeremy watched Damon's entire attention immediately shift toward his phone. Jeremy made an agreeing noise. "_Can you ask if they live anywhere near Hawkins University? Apparently one of the leading experts on werewolf mythology and lore is a professor there_."

"You're going to have strangers do your research _for _you?" Damon asked with a tsk.

"_Damon!_" Clare gushed happily and said vampire smirked, blue eyes lighting a shade. "_And of course I am._ _Obviously_."

* * *

"_C, I'm not going to ask them that. That's kind of crazy. Just because they're from California doesn't mean they live anywhere near the school…_ _And I'm not going to ask them to drive there either_." Jeremy was such a weenie, but I kind of expected that from him.

Which is why I was in his room, logging into his skype with the intent to ask _myself_. "Whoops, too late," I said happily, grinning as I spotted the familiar gamertag, _ZombieSpasm_, as the display name.

"_Clare_," if Jeremy thought he could warn me away, he had another thing coming. This was important.

I typed a quick message: _EMERGENCY _and then clicked the video chat button. Bitch better answer. "Hey, it's no big deal, I'll just Glamour him into doing my dark bidding."

"_I don't think it works that way_," Stefan was there too?

"_Yeah, it's not like compulsion. I'm pretty sure you have to be in person, as you influence the emotions._" Damon agreed. I tilted my head toward my phone, which was sitting by the keyboard. Inconvenient.

"Then get your cute little vampire ass over here."

"_He can't. Neither can Stefan_." Jeremy informed me pleasantly. "_Neither of them want you to see them dressed like this_." _That _immediately caught my attention. How were they dressed…? "_I'm sworn to secrecy_."

I stared at my phone wistfully. It was strange, feeling both pleased and pouty. _Pleased _because I liked that Jeremy was socializing and making friends with the murderous undead, pouty because I was missing out on what I was sure was hilarious.

"_Whoa, who are you?_"

I glanced up from the phone to a pale boy who looked to be around Jeremy's age, short dark hair, _adorable _moles and long eyelashes which framed light brown eyes that peered back at me through skype. Next to him was a boy who looked like a nicer version of Tyler.

"It's me. Jeremy." I deadpanned and the Tyler look alike squinted, leaning closer.

"_I'm not sure how to break this to you_," the pale kid said. "_But you're a girl_."

"I was wondering what those bumps on my chest were," I said as though thoughtful, grabbing my boobs. "I thought it was cancer."

"_I thought you said this call was an emergency_," the Tyler look alike said to the pale boy who flailed his arms dramatically in some kind of spastic, twitchy, shrug.

"It is. I need to ask you something—" I began, pleasantly.

The pale kid pointed at me unhappily. "_I already had my friend find that address for you, okay? I don't want to see another strip show!_"

Oh my God. This is who Damon stripped to?

"_Is he talking about Slater?_" Stefan wondered. "_You actually stripped for that_?"

"_Yeah. Zombie's girlfriend's aunt said it'd be a fair trade_," Jeremy said as pale boy, _Zombie _(it was cute how they called each other by their gamertags), choked on spit, eyes growing wide.

"_Wha-? N-no! We're not d-dating! We're _friends_!"_ He feverishly denied, shaking his head, cheeks red and blotchy. His Tyler look alike raised his eyebrows as though to say _'really_?'

"_Can… can you ask if they got the right address?_" A shy, girlish, voice off screen asked shyly, stealing Zombie's attention. Probably his girlfriend.

"Yup. Thanks. He's dead now. We killed him." I grinned merrily.

"_You killed Slater?!_" Stefan hissed angrily.

"_Staked him right in the chest_." Damon said happily.

"_Dude, you can't say that shit out loud. Zombie's dad is a cop!_"

Whoops.

Zombie and his friend were eyeing me oddly. Well—Zombie was making a face while his friend looked annoyed.

"_So… are you guys like… hunters?_" Zombies asked. "_Like is this a part of your roleplay game?_"

"_No, we're just murderers_," Damon chimed and I waved my hand about airily, dismissing his comment. "_Ouch!_ _Stef, what did I say about rough housing?_"

"Okay, here's what I need to know. Is there a Hawkins University by you?" A twitch of recognition from Zombie's end was all I needed and I beamed. "I need to get into contact with a Professor Eleanor Black."

"_Oh!_" The girl off screen cried suddenly, stumbling forward in a mess of red hair. She nearly crashed into Zombie who flailed out of his seat in surprise, but she paid him no mind, cheeks flushing as she pushed her old fashioned black glasses up the bridge of her nose. "_That's my Nona!_"

"_It's a small world after all_," Jeremy began to sing only to swear loudly as I assumed Damon (or Stefan) smacked him.

I grinned widely at the pretty red haired girl, bouncing in my seat excitedly. "_Really_?" This was beyond perfect. It was almost creepy that Jeremy was gamer friends with the guy's girlfriend whose grandmommy was the exact person I needed to speak with.

"_What would you like to know? I'm presuming you're interested in supernatural folklore…?_" The girl cut right to the chase, I liked it. She sat straighter in the computer chair as Zombie leaning against the desk next to her._ "I'm certain I can answer any questions of yours, it's my specialty_."

I wanted to know _how much _she knew. Drumming my fingertips over the desk, I leaned closer to the screen, lowering my voice. "What do you know of the moonstone?" The girl's hazel eyes peered sharply into mine, an almost _knowing _look in them. As if she knew I was testing her.

"_I'm going to the bathroom_," the Tyler look alike said with a sigh, standing. Rude. "_When I get back, I really want to get started on our project, okay? Enough with the MMO stuff_."

Zombie was quick to take the seat he had abandoned.

"_The moonstone_," Red, as I was now calling her, repeated, as though to clarify what I had said. I nodded. "_It can break the moon-and-sun curse with the blood of a werewolf, vampire and the Petrova doppelgänger. The ritual was only attempted once, from my knowledge, in 1492._"

Okay, so maybe I was a little impressed. Red knew her shit.

"_Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa_. _Wait_," her boyfriend looked between us, holding his hands out as though he needed to physically stop our conversation. "_What is this? What curse?_"

"_The moon-and-sun curse. If vampires break the curse, they can walk in daylight_," Red began to explain, tilting her head toward her boyfriend who blinked rapidly.

"_Vampires are—are real?_"

"And if a werewolf breaks the curse, he can transform at will, or not at all if he so chooses." I grinned as Zombie choked, his fingers twitching nervously.

"_Wa-wait! You're—you're saying that—that this curse can… can make it so Sc—so that werewolves don't have to be werewolves anymore?!_" He sputtered, jolting out of his chair and swirling his head around to Red. "_Why didn't you tell me!_"

Red held his stare evenly. "_Nobody knows where the moonstone is, or if the Petrova doppelgänger is even around. It wasn't relevant_." She pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose, turning back to me calmly. "_I also didn't take you for a murderer. That's what the ritual calls for. _Sacrifices."

"Yeah, Twitchy," I bobbed my head with a teasing grin as he sank in his seat. I decided to rename him. "Sheesh."

Twitchy sulked in his seat while Red smiled faintly. "_Now that you're done _testing _my knowledge_," ooh, she was totally calling me out on it too. "_What do you _really _want to know?_"

I leaned back in the computer chair, lazily. "Can werewolves pass their genes onto their offspring? And if so, is the curse triggered by something? Or do they just one day _become_?"

"_Why don't you read Harry Potter?_" Twitchy offered sarcastically but I pointedly ignored him.

"_Can I ask why the interest?_" Red asked quietly, her gaze slightly guarded. Interesting.

"I'm going to be frank with you, Red, I need to know. I _need _to know. I can't explain myself," because who the hell knew who she was, and if I told her I was certain the moonstone was in Mystic Falls and Katherine _wasn't_—well… that was dangerous. Especially if I was right about someone they knew was a werewolf, given Twitchy's reactions and the guarded look Red was giving me. Who knew where anyone's loyalties were when it came to supernatural things. "What if I tell you something about the moonstone, if you answer my two questions?"

There was something about Red that I really _liked_. I saw a sliver of myself in her. Maybe it was the flicker of understanding when I told her I _needed _to know, maybe it was the obvious love for research. I kind of respected the girl. I saw the same yearning to _know _glow in her gaze.

"_The werewolf gene is genetic, yes. Your second question would depend on which branch of werewolves the child—person—is from._" She began in her smooth, soft, voice while Twitchy gaped at her, like he couldn't believe she was telling me this. "_In 1318 two different werewolf head families, the Kiaakt and the T'ski broke a part, which are now the only two surviving lines. In 1334, the Kiaakt had pleaded with a powerful witch to suppress the curse, as they had longed for a more... normal life. But everything in nature has a balance, and so if the curse is triggered, they have zero control during full moons and their transformations are one of the most painful. If it's genetic, he or she would have to become a murderer for the curse to be triggered. They're the only werewolves that turn into _actual _wolves_." She paused and turned around, as though to look at someone. She turned back around and smiled apologetically. "_The second branch of werewolves, the T'ski family, can transform even if it isn't during the full moon or even at night—usually because of heightened emotions, like rage. They don't turn into wolves, usually, as the gene has learned control, even if it's passed on through a bite._"

Twitchy was staring at Red admiringly, as though deeply impressed. She quelled the once insatiable fire that had blazed so obsessively within me. She _knew her shit_. Like she _really _knew her shit and I couldn't help but feel... respect. And maybe even a little giddy. I grinned at her warmly, letting the information roll through me. There was so much more to research now, but I had a base, and I craved to know even _more_. But this was enough. Now I knew it was possible, Tyler might've been a werewolf. The Lockwoods all might've been werewolves, and that might've been the reason Katherinehad come to Mystic Falls in the first place.

I could turn the computer off right now, I could _lie _and not live up to my end of the bargain. But the spark to _know _was in her gaze, and I realized I couldn't deny her.

I leaned closer again. "Don't repeat what I'm about to tell you." I said quickly and her hazel eyes locked with mine. She leaned closer to the screen as well. "I mean it. Tell _no one_. The moon-and-sun curse is a _lie_. It's a front for something else entirely, something I don't yet know. Vampires do _not _need to break the curse to walk in daylight, there are… other means to achieve that. Elijah and Klaus Mikaelson. Those names are tied to the rumors and they're the ones who will literally stop at nothing to get their hands on the moonstone. It's personal for them."

"_Clary what the fuck?_" Damon snapped and I nearly forgot they were still on the other line. With the serious moment now broken, I beamed at the screen.

"Okay, bye! Don't get killed by knowing so much shit, kay!" I waved, logging off of Jeremy's skype. "It was a fair trade, D. She's like me. She lives for the knowledge."

"_We don't know who the fuck that is or who she _knows_._" Damon growled. "_You don't tell people that shit!_"

"_Guess we're going to California. Time to murder again_." Jeremy chimed sarcastically.

Drama queens.

"Bring me home something to eat." I requested pleasantly.

"_You get dick_." Damon said with a huff, and my phone let me know the call had immediately ended. I grinned.

* * *

Damon had somehow managed to talk them into going to Macy's as he wanted to 'check something out'. Honestly, Jeremy was certain all Damon wanted to do was keep Stefan in the footie pajamas for as long as possible. Which was whatever, he wasn't complaining. Stefan, on the other hand, was growing impatient. He debated on just _leaving_, and wasn't so sure why he was even allowing himself to be dragged around wearing this ridiculous thing. …Or why he was actually (kind of maybe) enjoying himself. It didn't make _sense_.

Disinterestedly, Jeremy stared at the overly fluffy hot pink pillow. With a sudden grin, he picked up the pillow and turned around, intent on smacking Stefan in the face with it—only to bounce backwards, his heart jumping into his throat. Alaric stood a few feet away, staring back at him with raised eyebrows.

_Oh shit_.

"Uh, hey," Jeremy was fumbling, and Stefan, who picked up on his heart rate, turned around only to stiffen upon seeing Alaric. "Weird to see you outside of class…" he attempted to joke while trying to think up something to say to quickly (but not rudely) excuse them.

"I don't… want to know." Alaric said good-naturedly, amused. He grinned at the two of them, shaking his head. Stefan had seemed like such a quiet, loner type. Alaric wasn't sure why he was wearing—whatever _that _was. "Please, just don't explain. I'm going to pretend I never saw this."

They looked so horrified to have been caught out and about like that too. Stefan's green eyes were wide and his cheeks were rapidly growing red as he shifted in obvious discomfort. "It—it was a bet! I don't actually walk around like this!" He insisted hurriedly and Alaric opened his mouth, to assure him it was fine.

"Do you think she'll like these?" Damon wondered, slinking in front of Jeremy and Stefan, with a package of yellow bed sheets in hand. He was tired of hopping into bed with _Minnie Mouse_, and these would go along with Clarissa's walls. He paused as Jeremy and Stefan grimaced.

What the hell was that about?

He rose his eyebrows, blue eyes shifting between the two of them. He turned around, facing some jackass. Was he the reason for the discomfort? Because Damon had no problem telling him to screw off.

The moment Alaric and the dark haired guy made eye contact, Alaric _knew _who he was. A chill swept through him—Isobel's murderer was standing two feet away from him. Her _murderer_. Here. In front of him. For a wild moment, he thought about lunging—he had a stake hidden on him, he could _do it_. Instead, Alaric smiled with mock friendliness. A moment later, he registered the choice of clothing, and felt a flicker of confusion fill him. A tutu? And that hoodie…

_This _is who killed his Isobel? He was an _idiot_.

"Well, it was great seeing you, but we have to go," Stefan said pleasantly as Damon clearly picked up on Alaric's mood change. Damon tilted his head to glance between Stefan and Jeremy, their unease obvious, before he turned back around to Alaric with slightly narrowed blue eyes.

"Please excuse my rude little brother," Damon said with a charming grin and Alaric was taken aback for a moment. _Brother_? Than that meant Stefan was… "I'm Damon Salvatore."

"Alaric Saltzman," Alaric's smile looked pretty friendly and he might've passed it off for such if his gaze hadn't darkened. He offered a hand. "I'm their history teacher."

Of course this was Alaric, and of _fucking _course Damon would meet him (officially) wearing a tutu. This was _not _how Damon wanted their first meeting to go, he was a scary vampire _damn it_. Brushing aside the slight annoyance that prickled, Damon smiled mockingly, taking his hand.

"Do you, uh, normally go out dressed like this?" Alaric asked with hostile friendliness, his smile becoming pointed, his playful joke filled with malice. Damon's mocking smile turned sarcastic and it was like watching a train wreck, Jeremy couldn't look away.

Stefan thought they were more like two queen bee girls, obviously hating on each other while acting like best friends. He'd rather this than a fight in the middle of Macy's, though.

"_Jer_ won a bet," Damon said with mock warmth and Jeremy winced. "What can I say?"

Alaric's gaze slid toward Jeremy and he was relieved the stare wasn't accusing. "Oh? You three are close, then?" Alaric wasn't sure what to make of this. Stefan had seemed like a decent kid, and what did that mean for _Jeremy_? Was he in trouble…? _But why would two vampires dress up like this…_?

"Mmhm, _extremely_." Damon stepped closer to Jeremy and Alaric's eyes narrowed a fraction, his smile becoming more cold. Stefan knew what was about to come flying out of his mouth next and buried his face in his palms. "I'm dating his sister, _Clary_."

The temperature surrounding them literally dropped. Stefan lifted his head, exchanging a look with Jeremy. Alaric's smile grew darker and he was flat out glaring now.

"Aren't you a little too old to be dating _Rissy_?" Alaric asked lightly and it _pissed _Damon off.

"What are you, her _father_?" Damon threw back tauntingly and the two locked in a stare.

"Well," Jeremy coughed loudly. "We have to go. Like—now. So…"

Stefan snatched Damon's arm, pulling. "See you tomorrow, Mr. Saltzman." Please don't bring stakes to school.

"It was good meeting you, _Ric_." Damon said pleasantly, his grin turning feral. "Good luck with whole teaching history thing. That subject is my least favorite, I have a terrible habit of _repeating _it."

The threat was so clear and so sinister that Jeremy froze, his breath catching in his throat. Without looking back at the history teacher, he quickly followed after the two vampires. It was a little sickening how _true _that was, as Damon had already repeated history by killing Clare. _A few times_.

But he trusted Damon.

He trusted Damon more than the majority of the people he _knew_.

"Dude, you need to—" Jeremy began and Damon cut it off with a scoff.

"He wants to stake me in the heart, I don't have to be polite to him." Damon said with an eye roll, clearly agitated, and Jeremy shook his head.

"I was going to say you need to keep an eye on him. Clare… gets really weird about him." Both vampires turned to look at him. "Like it might be… supernatural." Jeremy was weirded out enough by the whole thing to be a little worried. "I mean, he shows up out of the blue? And Clare just likes him for no reason? She's _spiking _his coffee with vervain and when I question her, she gets angry and says _we have to _protect him."

Damon and Stefan both narrowed their eyes, Stefan thoughtful, Damon angry. The darker haired vampire glanced over his shoulder, but Alaric was gone.

* * *

It was almost one in the morning when Damon crept into Clarissa's bedroom. They'd just got back from the mall and Jeremy had talked Stefan into playing his new game with him all night. Who needed sleep? If Jeremy was bummed Hot Gamer Girl bailed, he didn't show it and Damon was still irritated by Teacher to push the matter.

Clarissa was surprisingly fast asleep and Damon's gaze swept across her face, feeling warmed by the sight of her. Unable to deny himself, he crawled into the bed. She snuggled closer, seeking his warmth, seeking _him_ and he buried his face in the crook of her neck, breathing her in. Little by little the irritation fell away, her skin on his bringing a rush of relief, calming him.

"Mmm," Clarissa was stirring awake, her arms curling around his neck. "You brought me the D." Her voice was husky with sleep and Damon's lips lifted into a smirk. He pressed his mouth to her neck, planting an open mouth kiss on her flesh, right where her pulse fluttered.

Her sigh of pleasure hummed though him as continued trailing his mouth up her neck. Clarissa pulled him closer, her arms moving down his back only to pause, tugging on one of the wings on the hoodie.

"I'm wearing Rainbow Dash," Damon mumbled, lightly tugging on her earlobe with blunt teeth. Her soft moan made his fangs throb with hunger, his hand greedily sliding up her side, fingers pulsing with the need to touch her skin. He was trying to keep himself in check, he was kissing her neck for a _reason_.

But the way she _moaned_, and the way she _tasted_, and the way she _felt_ against him—Damon was having trouble thinking, a haze of lust clouding his thoughts. She made him want her so damn bad.

"Who…?" Clarissa was breathless and Damon captured her mouth with his, at the end of his restraint. He needed to taste her _now_. Her fingers sank into his hair as he swept his tongue into her sweet mouth, her moan sparking a heat that washed over him as her fingers tightened.

She pulled his face closer to hers, sucking on his tongue with sudden fervor. _Knew it_. Damon smirked and let her push him back, flipping their positions as she rolled on top of him, straddling his waist. There was something about Clarissa taking control that turned Damon on so _bad_. His pulse jumped excitedly as she hungrily explored his mouth, her tongue sliding over his, commanding and dominating. Her warm fingers gripped his face, like she couldn't get _enough _of him, like she _needed _him closer. It dragged a groan out of him. His fangs ached and throbbed, and he grasped her hip, guiding her movement so she was slowly grinding into him. _Fuck_.

"Damon," she panted between messy, urgent, kisses. His name was soaked with hunger and he growled, fingers tightening on her hip, pressing her harder against him. She gasped and it sent him wild. He wanted to tear _more _sounds from her. "You taste—so _good_." Her eyes were bright in the darkness, her hair hanging off one shoulder, creating a curtain of black silk. He wanted to slam her down on the bed, wanted to grab her hair, wanted to _touch _her, wanted to make her feel so damn good.

"I've been eating nothing but sugar," he informed her, smirking, feeling a little crazy with the way her heart fluttered.

She grabbed his face, pulling him into another demanding kiss. He was losing control, _fast_. He needed to _slow it down_, otherwise when he bit her, her lust would take control and his plan would be long forgotten. Damon sat up, pulling her lower in his lap, her legs on either side of him. He gently grasped her chin between his thumb and index finger, caressing her skin as he slowed the kiss down.

"I'm addicted. It's a _crisis_." He quoted back at her, his voice low, and Clarissa's bright gaze was both adoring and hungry. His fangs slid out as his control flickered and he slowly dragged his thumb across her bottom lip.

Clarissa was so obviously _his _at this point, he could do anything with her. That thought did _nothing _for his self-control. He drew her face closer to his, tilting her head, her heartbeat dancing loudly as his mouth softly met her neck. He brushed his mouth down her throat lightly and her hands crept up his chest and over his shoulders, as she continued making soft noises of pleasure that drove him wild. Gently, slowly, he sank his fangs into her flesh and her fingers curled as she drew in a sharp breath, shivering.

Her blood was sweet in his mouth to the point where he nearly moaned and then it was pure _Clarissa_. Everywhere her blood delightedly bounced off of inside of him lit up brightly. Her sweet, adoring, affection flouncing about, happily leading him into a burningly bright, blissful, euphoria. Damon was melting, a mess of giddiness, as he was so very much happily lost within her. Lost in her vast, endless, bright glee. Lost in the pure affection she held for him. He felt so _whole _once her heart was dancing happily, warmly, in his chest again, like it was _meant _to be there. Like they were _meant _to be connected.

Damon was endlessly in awe of his birdhouse, endlessly breathless with how _much _she adored him and how deep her feelings ran. He liked being able to feel her slowly and happily falling for him the way he was for her. His lips tingled against her skin, her blood singing at the contact. Waves of her desire spilled into his, tangling, and Damon withdrew his fangs to kiss the spot he'd bitten into. He couldn't let himself be swept up right now.

"Clarissa," he murmured, nuzzling affectionately into her, trying to keep himself from flipping her over onto the bed and kissing her. Her fingers were weaving through his hair, happiness dancing at the sound of her name. But he _needed_ to know what was going on inside of his hummingbird when it came to Teacher. "I bumped into Alaric today."

Delight. _Pure _delight. It was warm and sunny, almost mimicking the way she felt whenever he brought up _Jeremy_, but it was different. He could feel her mystified confusion over it brimming under the surface, and there was a slight _need _to be delighted. Damon's fingers tightened around her hips.

"He's a pretty cool guy," she said happily, voice filled with admiration that irritated Damon. His irritation wasn't enough to drown out his rising unease. _Something _was influencing her feelings about Alaric and he wanted to know _why_. "I hope you guys don't try to kill each other."

Damon ran the pad of his thumb across her collarbone, enjoying the affectionate glee that rose up at his touch and the way her blood happily twirled at the contact. "And if I did kill him?"

Miffed irritation. Confusion. _Sorrow._ More confusion. And a hiss of protectiveness flared up within her. Clarissa was fumbling, he could feel the confusion dominating everything else she was feeling—torn between siding with him, and the strange demand that swirled inside of her. Damon bit the inside of his cheek as it spilled into him.

"I—I don't… We have to protect him."

His gaze locked with hers.

"Damon, we _have _to protect him," even as she said it, firmly, he felt her frustrated confusion grow and it pissed the hell out of him. He hated whatever this was—if she had felt that way about Alaric herself, fine, he'd respect it (mostly), but it _wasn't _her.

"Who is 'we'?" He wondered quietly and she blinked, her confusion growing. "You said _we _have to protect him. Who is we and what are we protecting him from?"

Clarissa blinked again, her stunned surprise blazing through him. "I… I don't know, we just have to." Unease shifted through her and she sat back, the need to distance herself, as though it'd help her think clearly, loud.

"Why?" He didn't fucking like that she was feeling uneasy, he didn't fucking like that something—Alaric? Fairies?—could _make _her feel a certain way.

"Because we fucking have to, okay?" She snapped, her confusion turning to anger quickly, blue-gray eyes flashing at him. The _hell _did she have to take this out on him for?

This need was seeping into him, he realized, because he found himself promising. "Fine." He huffed, wanting to unwind her, to chase away the irritation, to soothe away the frightened confusion. He smirked at her playfully. "The shit I do for you, I swear…" but most of all, he just wanted her to be happy. And until he could figure out what this was, and how to break it, he would appease her.

Her awkward, confused, relief was _his _relief. This instantly fell into an impish glee that suddenly bounced through him from her and she wrapped her arms around his neck. His eyebrows rose slowly as he gazed at her curiously, a mischievous grin sneaking across her lips.

"Stay the night."

It wasn't a request.

And even if it was, it would be impossible to refuse her. Not when she _looked _at him like _that_, not when it was already difficult as hell to keep his hands off her. There was a quieter part of him that knew, even if she didn't want him spending the nights with her, he'd secretly do it anyway. The idea that there was _something _they couldn't see, that could be in her room at any given time, left him feeling anxious. _And pissed_. But mostly anxious. He would be _damned _if he let anything happen to Clarissa.

Smirking, Damon shoved her from his lap, gracefully gliding from the bed. Clarissa rolled onto her side, peering up at him, and Damon would be lying if he said he didn't make a show of pulling off this damned hoodie, or went a little extra slow when undoing his belt. Maybe he liked the way her gaze was locked onto him, maybe he liked the way her heart skipped inside his chest, maybe he liked the way her awe and desire coursed through him. It rolled through him in lazy waves and his smirk grew, making her heart beat _faster_.

"I'm not a piece of meat for you to ogle and objectify with your eyes, Clary," he teased playfully, kicking his jeans across the room.

"Yes you are. You're a gym teacher. Now cuddle me." Clarissa chimed back in a playful demand and Damon snorted as his want to do whatever the hell she wanted grew.

"You don't have to _Glamour_ me, princess," he told her, crawling into the bed, easily scooping her into his arms and drawing her closer. Clarissa curled around him, nuzzling her face into his chest, her delight spiking his.

"I don't know how to turn it off," sleep traced her words and hung around her, making _him _feel suddenly tired when he had been wide awake before. _Son of a dick_. "I think it happens by itself when I really want something."

Damon slid his fingers through her hair, feeling pleased. "Maybe we should send you to fairy bootcamp."

"Nnnhm, I want to be bestowed with gifts forever. Strangers _should _feel the need to make me king."

Damon smirked. _Brat_.

* * *

Wednesday, October 13th

* * *

That was the _third _person Stefan had never seen before who had mentioned something cat related to him. Right out of the blue. Smiling at him like he was supposed to be in on the inside joke. Puzzled, Stefan frowned, watching the kid walk away from him. What was _surprised kitty_?

* * *

Thursday, October 14th

* * *

The whole about-to-say-something-and-then-not thing was really driving me up a wall. I _hated _that. Especially since it was all over Alaric's face. He even opened his mouth only to close it. It was before classes, so it was just us in the classroom.

"Whatever you want to say, just say it." It was best to be completely direct when it came to this kind of thing. Alaric didn't even seem fazed by how blunt I was being, in fact he looked like he was just waiting around for me to finally confront him.

Damn it, Isobel. Why are we so alike? I _liked _throwing people.

Alaric leaned against his desk, casually. I kind of got the impression that's how Alaric worked, acted pretty calm and casual when he was uncomfortable. "I, uh, bumped into Damon." He picked up his coffee, staring down at it, and I stared back at him.

Why was this so awkward?

Oh right.

He thinks Damon killed his wife.

And I look like her.

Thanks, Damon.

He tilted his head slightly, looking sideways at me, slowly turning the coffee in his hands. "Your aunt doesn't really like you dating an older guy…"

We weren't dating! We were just… Special friends. That were exclusive. To each other. I shifted, a combination of strange feelings growing. Giddy that Alaric was talking to Jenna (maybe he was lying), pleasantly surprised that Alaric _cared_ (of course he cared, I look like Isobel! He probably only _sees _Isobel!), and guilty because for some bizarre reason _I _cared about what he thought.

"She's willing to give him a chance." I grinned at him teasingly, trying to keep it light. Alaric's gaze met mine.

We stood in silence for a few seconds, Alaric clearly debating on what to say next. Finally, he said seriously, "If he ever does something you don't like, or hurts you in _any_ kind of way, let me know." _Oh my God_.

"Teach history by daylight, become a masked vigilante by moonlight, huh?" If I ever spotted Alaric swinging from rooftops dressed like Batman, my life would forever be complete and I could die happy. A grin twitched across his face.

"It's actually a requirement of all history teachers." Alaric joked back, taking a sip of the coffee I made. He made a face. "You're… _uh_, maybe have Elena make this instead?"

_Rude_.

"Keep drinking it, jerk. I'm leaving." I huffed, skipping towards the door.

"Don't be late for class _again_," Alaric reminded, glancing up toward the clock. "It starts in three minutes."

I merely grinned at him before making my way to James' locker to meet up with Caroline. She was a pain in the ass and could've met me by the door, since Alaric's class was on the way to James' locker, but _noooo_. Whatever.

* * *

CAN I JUST EXPLAIN TO YOU A THING REAL QUICK, OKAY. THE BRONIES THING CAN'T BE ALL PINNED ON ME!  
OKAY.  
This is all Carleigh's fault. It was like 2AM, and I don't know what the fuck was happening, but I'm pretty sure we were both on drugs. Or maybe a little manic, I dunno! She looks up at me after doing a line of pixie sticks, "Slater was a Brony." Followed by. "You know Slater ships Derpy and Dr Whooves." and "We'd taint Damon with more darkness than 150 years of being a vampire"  
I'M 1000000% DONE WITH LIFE.  
But then **thegrandtootah**, **melissalzn**,** cheesecakeluver7**, **vampfuckerysquared**, **sunpixie2000**, and my bb **Jackieoh** LIKE THE IDEA. AND ENCOURAGED IT. SO THEY ARE TO BLAME JUST AS MUCH. OKAY GUYS.

Also, a few of you asked about Derek Hale being mentioned in the Fae Guide-I'M SO SORRY THAT WAS A JOKE!

**Q: Teen Wolf?**  
You _DO NOT_ need to know anything about Teen Wolf! However, there will be a crossover happening with JackieOh which will involve TVD things, rather than Teen Wolf things. You should swing by JackieOh's _Perch _to get to know Maureen!

Gah.

I don't actually have time to answer questions like normally-I was supposed to leave like three minutes ago. _Shit_.

ASJFBHJFAF BUT ANYWAY! THANK YOU SO SO SO SO SO SO FRIGGIN MUCH FOR ALL THE REVIEWS! HOLY SHIT. GUYS. WE BROKE 700! I SERIOUSLY LOVE YOU GUYS. I feel like we need to celebrate. You guys are the BEST! Your kind words and love and support and encouragement seriously mean the world to me! I hope you enjoyed the chapter and I hope I can continue making you all happy. I WRITE FOR YOU. THIS IS _YOUR _STORY!


	22. Chapter 22

Disclaimer: Nope.

Big, huge, mega thank you to my reviewers: MrsMusicAddict, melissawtf, Lady Dianne Salvatore, RealHuntress18, XxxBrEnDaxxX, TheGrandTootah, SomebodyWhoCares, Alu Riversong, Peace and Love831, behindXblueXeyes, padfootfaerie123, nessafly, Jasmine, ADORATIO, flazzy cullen, JackieOh, Fourth Lumbar Down, Lil Miss Sunshine14, TiaSalvatore, alyssaexplains, EmmaMarie, 1llu510n, Sammy, All the Guests, Lucilla Tinwetari, Dark-n-Twisty. Seriously guys, I love you.

* * *

Friday, October 15th

* * *

Scott crossed one leg over the other, leaning back in his squeaky computer chair, a notebook perched on his knee as he watched Jenna pace back and forth while Clare texted, looking unconcerned. He had decided it would be best if the last fifteen minutes would be dedicated to just these two, as Jeremy was quick to defend Clare and Elena was quick to try to take control over the situation.

The Gilbert children had a lot of _issues_, most of which Scott was certain with a little enduring guidance they would be able to get back onto their feet and live happier lives. For the _most_ part, Scott had a good grasp on the three Gilbert children and could gauge what exactly mood they were in based on where they sat and the first thing to be said. For Clare, how she was feeling usually dictated by what she called him: Scarebear, Dr. Crane, or Doc. For Elena, it was how she approached the starting conversation: _I_, _we_, _they_. For Jeremy, it was how much he spoke. In the few visits he had with this family, Scott thought he had the three of them basically figured out and Jenna appeared to be doing a much better job at stepping up and taking the need for Elena to be the _parent _of her siblings off her shoulders.

"Do you think what you did was wrong, Clare?" Scott asked softly, tapping his pen against the pad, watching amusement flicker across her face as she continued to text.

Clare wasn't _acting out_, he was coming to realize. Nothing she did was _cries for attention_. She was merely _amused_. At one point, he had thought she was Bipolar and in a state of hypomania. It would explain a lot of her behavior. But Scott was coming to find that she didn't exhibit any of the other symptoms. The smallest Gilbert appeared to be in a constant battle between _two very different _personalities. On one hand, Clare was very loving and protective of her family. On the other, there was a chilling indifference that didn't seem to come from a mental illness. She appeared to sometimes struggle with connecting and seemed honestly amused by doing terrible things, even at the cost of her family's happiness.

"No, I think what I did was _hilarious_," she stated cheerfully, a wicked grin on her lips. Jenna whirled around and stomped over to the half distracted teen, ripping the phone from her hands. Clare's head shot up. "Hey!"

"Putting 'Our history teacher was married to our birth mom' on a cake isn't funny, Clare!" Jenna exploded causing Clare's amused grin to grow. "This is serious! Why aren't you comprehending that!" Jenna whirled around to face Scott angrily. "What's _wrong _with her?"

Scott sat up a little as Clare's entire demeanor flew into one that he had never seen before. A _third _personality bleeding through—haughty and detached, eyes disinterested, her head slanted slightly as though she were bored. A defense mechanism, perhaps? Clearly she had been hurt by her aunt's words.

"There's nothing wrong with Clare, Jenna," Scott soothed in a calming voice. "I think you're taking your hurt and anger out on Clare. Do you want to talk about why this is upsetting for you?"

"Isn't it obvious, _Doc_?" Clare drawled as Jenna sank into the couch, looking stressed.

"Clare, why don't you join your siblings in the waiting room?" Scott suggested and Clare's smile was patronizing.

She didn't make another comment as she gracefully strolled from the room, looking like a completely different person. Scott didn't have time to analyze her behavior and turned his attention back to Jenna.

"It should have been me to tell them," Jenna said quietly, eyes on the arm of the couch. "Everything happened so suddenly. Suddenly I have to be all grown up, have to be _serious_, take care of her kids… How was I supposed to look at Elena and Clare and tell them they were adopted? Clare had been so… _gone_ and Elena was struggling to keep it together. How could I tell them that their parents weren't their actual parents—I mean… I mean… They were. But they weren't…"

"They seem to be handling it alright." Scott pointed out softly. "Do you think perhaps Clare chose to reveal they know in such a manner because it honestly doesn't bother them?"

Jenna chewed on her lip, glancing at him unhappily. "I feel like I can't keep this from Alaric, he should know—I mean, he must know, Clare apparently looks very similar to—to Isobel—his… his wife. Who is presumed dead, but I actually—I.. And—and she had gotten involved with Damon! And now Damon is involved with _Clare_! And Alaric knows that—about her knowing Damon and then she went missing! And _I_ might think Alaric is a little cute which just complicates everything even more, I mean, I can't possibly think about wanting to date someone who is technically my nieces' step father!"

She flushed, as if she hadn't meant to blurt that all out, and buried her face in her hands, releasing a frustrated scream into her palms. Scott blinked.

This family was the strangest group of people he had ever met, let alone attempted to _help_.

"Jenna, I think we should have private one on ones…"

He had been clearly mistaken about them being on the right track. This family needed some _serious _help.

* * *

Damon was trying out that whole Not-Being-A-Clingy-Boyfriend thing which was why he was parked about a block from Blondie's house. He wasn't being clingy, as he was giving Clarissa space to hang out with her friend. But he wasn't going to be stupid and leave her completely unprotected. He wanted to be close by, just in case something (someone) decided to pay her a visit. Damon didn't have to worry about vampires, but those damn puffball fairies that could enter houses and be completely unseen. And _influence _her.

It was one in the morning and he was bored even with the tablet he had gone out and bought just for this. Pretending to be cat obsessed Stefan on facebook had lost its amusement two hours ago.

His phone lit up, _Claryberry _popping up across his screen and he was bringing his phone to his ear before it even had a chance to ring.

"Cla—"

"_Daaaaammooon_!" Clarissa's gleeful voice nearly shouted from the other end, enough so that he winced. "_Daaaamon! Daaammmoooon! Hi! Oh my God I love your name. You have a greaaaaat name, like I could s-say your name forever. I love your name. Best name. You're the best._"

Damon paused, hesitating. Was she…? Was she _drunk_…? He wasn't sure how he felt about that. Annoyed that he wasn't there with her, yet kind of _amused_. While being a little pleased that she had called him. "Everything about me is the best, Claryberry," he informed her, trying to get a feel on what kind of drunk she was.

"_I love, like, everything about you_," she slurred happily and his smirk grew into a faint grin. "_You're so, so, sooo pretty. You're my vampire. Oh my God, you're my vampire! My vaaampy-wampy-pireee._" She sang giddily and Damon knew what kind of drunk she was. A talker. "_All mine! Ohhh, Damooon… I'm so boooored. Care ditched me! For a boy. For _that _boy! I don't like that boy but she won't let me trick him into doing something bad. It isn't fair. I just want to trip him down the steps, he'd get better, it wouldn't kill him_. _I don't like him, Damon! He takes my Caroline away. She's _my_ best friend, and he takes her from me!_"

Drunk bored Clarissa was clearly a very dangerous Clarissa. "I would let you trip anyone you wanted down a flight of steps," Damon started his car, now intent on retrieving his drunken fairy before she killed someone. He narrowed his eyes, irritation flaring up. "Is _that boy _in the house with you and Blondie? Right now?"

He didn't really like the idea of a teenage boy alone with a drunk Clarissa.

"_Oh Damon, my lovely Damon, my perfect Damon_," she sighed happily causing his fingers to twitch on the steering wheel. "_I just want to break his legs._" So much for her drunkenly sweet talking him."_Just a little bit. Could we do that? Break his legs? And then who wins? I win. Tell him, no this is going to be how it is now. And he'll be like, I think I need to go to the hospital. Shove him down a flight of steps in a wheelchair! Ha! Haaaaa!_" Clarissa's drunken laugh sent a shiver of twisted excitement through Damon. Shit.

"Is he there, Clary?" But right now he needed her to _focus_.

"_She left me_," Clarissa whined, and he could picture her pout so clearly. "_With him. Closed the door in my face! Like you. Why is everyone always closing the door in my face to have sex?_"

She just had to bring that up, didn't she? Parking outside of Blondie's, Damon didn't bother turning off the car as he flitted to the door. "Come outside, Claryberry."

"_Okaaaaay_."

He pocketed his phone, raising his eyebrows as he heard her crash into something and giggle hysterically. _Lord_. It took five minutes (a lot of stumbling, crashing, and giggling) before she threw the door open, uncaring as it hit the wall with a loud _SMACK_. Clarissa's cheeks were flushed, eyes glowing and half-lidded. She smirked drunkenly, leaning against the doorframe. Suddenly all he wanted to do was kiss her.

"Did I call _you_?" She slurred before bursting into peals of chiming laughter that sent a jolt through his body, heating everything up. Damon blinked a few times, trying to shake the haze that was attempting to cloud his thoughts.

He shot her a charming smile, trying to redirect her focus from _Glamouring _him. "Allow me to take you home, princess."

She peered up at him through her eyelashes, an attractive smile lighting her face. With a giggle, she swayed a little and stumbled out of the doorway. "I want to chaaaaange the world!" She sang loudly, prancing (flailing and teetering dangerously) past him. "Kaaaaaze wo kakenuuuukete, nanimo osorezu ni!" What the _hell_…?

"Clary," he tilted his head, staring at the wide open door, then back to his birdhouse who was now rolling across the road. She wasn't going to close the door, and Damon didn't care enough to ask her to.

"I'm Inuyasha! A half demon! We have to find the jewel of four souls!" Her amused drunken cackle echoed off neighboring houses and Damon immediately realized that being sober was going to _blow_.

Biting back a groan of irritation, he flitted toward his drunken birdhouse, easily pulling her to her feet. She burst into amused laughter, tossing her arms around his neck and yanking, as though trying to pull him down to the road. Rolling his eyes, Damon swept her legs up into his arms, carrying her bridal style.

"Oh! Oh! Let's go somewhere! I wanna go somewhere!" Clarissa chirped happily, gesturing wildly with her hands and nearly smacking him in the face. "Let's—oh Damon, let's go to Walmart, or, ummm, ummm, let's… I wanna dance!" Clarissa gushed, her gaze growing brighter as she wiggled in his arms. Damon stared down at her, marveling over how suddenly he _really _fucking wanted to go dancing. Apparently being drunk off her ass made her Glamour abilities a hell of a lot stronger. "Take me dancing, Damon! I wanna go dancing! Dancing!"

She was going _home_. "Anything you want, birdhouse," he lied pleasantly. Chances were she was going to forget within a few seconds anyway.

Getting Clarissa to sit her ass down and stay still was proving to be extremely difficult. So much so, Damon was tempted to slam on the brakes just to _prove_ his point. It was odd, being both slightly vexed and amused. Clarissa might've been drunk, but she knew how to be damn fucking cute about it even if she was annoying the hell out of him.

"Because he's… listen, D, he's a… a—sock cucker!" Clarissa continued passionately and Damon's mouth twitched. Sock cucker, huh?

"Cock sucker." He corrected, just to be an ass, and she wobbled as she tilted toward him, a suggestive smile curling across her mouth that he couldn't fucking stop looking at, eyes half lidded and mischievous.

_Fuck_.

"Is that," she rested her chin on his arm, fluttering her eyes prettily, her hand sliding across his thigh sending a pulse of hunger throughout his entire body. "What you want me to be, Damon?" Her breath smelled like sweets and whiskey.

He was so _aware _of her, he locked onto every breath she took, her pulse a terrible tease. It made his fangs ache. He curled his pulsing fingers around the steering wheel tightly, to keep himself from touching her, from pulling her into his lap. She was _drunk _and he wasn't going to take advantage of her like this—her hand was slowly inching closer and _closer_, moving down his thigh.

Fuck.

_Fuck_.

_Fuck!_

Damon tried to think clearly as a thick haze fell over his thoughts, the combination of her Glamour and his own fucking _want _fanning a searing heat that made his fingers twitch, begging to touch her. She was turning him on and it was _bullshit_. She was drunk, she didn't know what the _hell _she was saying. And with how good she smelled, and the way she was looking at him, and the way her fingertips were drumming against his jeans, he was going to lose control.

Damon slammed his hand against the radio and Clarissa instantly brightened, tilting away from him. He felt like he could fucking breathe again.

"Oh I love this song! I love this song so much!" She gushed happily and, half frustrated that she could just spout that shit out and get him flustered, he was relieved that she was finally fucking sitting. "This is my song! Oh my God, this is my song! I love it!"

"You're drunk," he puffed out a breath, trying to cool himself down. "You love _everything_—"

"SOOOMEBOOODY _SAAAAAAAVE _MEEEEE!" Clarissa drunkenly howled along to the song, loud and horrifically off-key. "Let your waaaarm hands break right through it! SOOOOMEBODY SAAAAVE MEEE! I don't care how you do it, just staaay! Staaaaay! C'moooon! I've been waitin' for yooou!"

At least her singing totally killed his hardon. Damon tilted his gaze back over to her as she continued belting out the lyrics, occasionally getting the lines wrong without care. This was _his _idiot.

Entering through the front door was a no go, as Damon was pretty sure it was locked and even _if _Clarissa had the key, he didn't feel like _dealing _with her drunken fumbling. Instead he settled for going through her bedroom window.

"Oh _woooow_," she slurred with drunken admiration as he sauntered toward the light switch, shifting her slightly in his arms as he flicked the lights on. She was drunk, but that didn't make him feel any less smug. He smirked at her as she gaped at him with childlike awe. "That was so cool, Damon! You're so _cool_! You, like, whoosh! And bam, here I am! Just like that! Whoosh! Through my window! You're so cool, Damon!"

That was him, Mr. Cool.

He gently set her down on her bed, placing a finger over his lips. "Shhh, Clary."

She grinned drunkenly back at him, lowering her eyelids slightly, her smirk way too attractive as she leaned closer to him, raising her finger to her lips, copying him. "Shhhh…"

He wanted to sink his fingers in her hair and kiss her hard. Fucking Glamour.

"Now go to bed." He commanded and she giggled shrilly.

"No!" Clarissa refused with a smile, attempting to slid off the bed. He gently pushed her back down.

"What did I say? Shh, remember?" He mock scolded and she batted his hand away from her as she wiggled out of the bed, nearly falling flat on her face. Damn it. He wasn't going to act like her babysitter. If she wanted to drunkenly stumble around and get herself hurt, then fine!

He was pretty sure she was minutes away from passing out anyway. Clarissa swayed where she stood, squinting down at her jeans. Amused, Damon leaned against the wall, watching as she fumbled with the buttons, making noises when she was repeatedly unsuccessful with unbuttoning her jeans. Pouting drunkenly, she tilted her half-lidded gaze toward Damon who was immediately swamped with wanting to appease her.

Brat.

"Help me out of my pants, Damon," she cooed sweetly, her glowing eyes burning into him. Her gaze was like fingertips the way they caressed his skin, drawing him in. There was a humming under the surface, urging him to go to her, to do whatever she wanted. A sweet promise lingering in the air between them if only he closed the distance between them.

Damon crossed his arms and smirked.

"Quit Glamouring me and get your cute ass into bed." He was struggling with sounding unaffected, struggling with keeping still. She smiled prettily at him and his heart rate sped up. He needed to get some fucking four leaf clovers, this was insane. Licking his suddenly dry lips, he gave in, "Fine. But you're going to bed after you get into your damn _night clothes_. I'm not your babysitter."

The next time Clarissa got drunk, he had better be the one providing the alcohol. Because being sober _sucked_.

Crouching down in front of her, he kept her mostly still as he easily undid the first button. Pain in his ass…

"This is exactly how I want you. On your knees, eager to _please _me." Clarissa's husky voice froze him. She did _not _just say that. Her soft fingers looped under his chin, lifting his head, and his body reacted instantly to her touch. Damon could only stare as her lips slanted upward into one of the sexiest smirks he'd ever seen on her. Her half-lidded blue-gray eyes glowed wickedly down at him. "Where do you fantasize biting me? Because I can tell you exactly where I _need _you to put your mouth."

She kissed him hard before his brain was able to catch up to her words, his body jolting, going into a spastic overdrive as she applied pressure on his chin, parting his lips and pushing her tongue into his mouth. He wasn't sure how his little birdhouse could jump from fumbling drunk to dominating sex kitten under three seconds flat. Hell, he wasn't sure where this dominating personality even fucking came from! She had been so fucking asexual before him and got flustered if he took off his _shirt_!

But he fucking _liked _it.

And now he couldn't _think_, a maddening heat searing every single thought from his mind except the hungry need to have her moaning. Growling, he gripped her hips, yanking the jeans from her and flipping her onto the floor. She moaned into his mouth, sparking his burning lust even hotter, the desire pelting into him almost violently. He needed her. He had to have her. He was too hot, he couldn't _think_, he just needed to feel her, touch her, taste her. She arched into him as he stumbled onto of her, easily pushing a part her legs with a knee. Clarissa's arms tangled around his neck as he took control over the kiss, her mouth tasting like a combination of alcohol and sugar.

He was going to lose it—he had to touch her. His entire body ached for her, and it was starting to become painful. Feeling frantic, their kiss become more urgent and heated, Damon slid his hands up her sides, hastily pushing her shirt upward. Her skin on his brought a brief relief. She was so _soft_. He had to touch her _everywhere_, needed to touch her everywhere.

His hips rolled into hers and she moaned into his mouth, arching her back.

_Yes, yes, yes_.

No, no, no!

Clarissa was _drunk_.

But she felt _so fucking good_.

His fangs slid out as he hungrily, messily, trailed his mouth down her throat. She was moaning too loudly, he'd be _damned _if someone woke up and decided to kick him out.

"Mmm—_Damon_." He clamped a hand over her mouth and she pushed his hand down. "Nooo, listen, is it sex with a free meal if you get with a chick on her period?"

…_Wha_?

Her words swirled around in his half clouded mind and he paused, his fangs slowly retracting as the madness that had gripped him fizzled and fell away. Damon took in a breath and broke out laughing into the crook of her neck. He had been seconds from tearing her clothes off, and now he was _amused_. He wasn't really sure how she managed to do this to him, and he was a little surprised when he only felt a warm, deep, fondness for her. Lifting his head, he kissed her affectionately on the nose.

"It's time for bed, beautiful," he swept her off the floor and playfully tossed her onto her bed. She released a few drunken giggles as she bounced, sprawling out across her new yellow sheets. He flitted in front of her, gently grasping her chin and pulling her into a swift kiss. "Sleep tight, Claryberry."

She nuzzled into his touch. "Stay."

He didn't know if her Glamour had anything to do with it, or if he simply had a difficult time leaving her when she _wanted _him here. When _he _wanted to stay. Damon forced himself to withdraw his hand, taking a few reluctant steps away from her. He would be lying if he said it wasn't just a little physically painful.

"Mmm, not tonight, hummingbird."

If she didn't pass out and continued to talk to him like she had, or touching him, Damon wasn't sure he'd be able to keep himself in check. He'd nearly bitten her before. He was shit with control when it came to Clarissa, and with her heavily Glamouring him—she was drunk and he needed to keep a distance. He reached the window, deciding to wait until she passed out before reentering her room.

"Please don't leave me."

Her quiet plea froze him where he stood, rooting him to the floor, his breath catching in his throat. It took a full second to realize nothing but himself was keeping him locked in place and he tilted, turning around to glance at her. Clarissa was sitting on her bed, her head slanted to the right, her hair acting as a curtain.

"You'll leave me because I'm wrong. I'm so wrong." She sniffled, a drunken bitterness clear in her voice. "They always ask, what's _wrong _with her? Always. Ever since I was little, everyone has said it."

She had to be fucking kidding him—she'd reach the tearful part of being drunk. Fucking great. "Clary…" he murmured softly, stepping closer, and her watery gaze pinned him with a cold look that froze him again.

"Even _you_." Her words were like a kick to the chest. "_You _said it to me too."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Damon was reeling, where the hell was this coming from?

"What a beautiful girl, such a _pity_." She continued on, bitterly. "Why does she behave like that? What's _wrong _with her? Maybe she has wires crossed inside her head. That's what she thought—that I had _wires _crossed. I embodied her greatest disappointment and I was _strange_." Clarissa was flat out crying. Drunkenly crying and bitter. He hated this. "But it all makes sense now! What amused me was _wrong_, what amuses me is still wrong! I'm _wrong_."

"Don't put me in the same category as _her_, Clary." Damon said quietly. "You _know_ I don't think that way."

"Sometimes it's on your face, you don't know what to make of me."

This was fucking bullshit. "You're drunk and sad, we'll talk about this when you're sober. You're not _seeing _things clearly—"

"I am sad. I'm so sad." Clarissa's soft voice had him stiffening all over again. "I feel so ruined and _angry _inside. I could turn it off. I turned it all off, all my feelings. I made myself feel nothing. To be how everyone wanted to me to be, I had to be cold and dead inside, and I did it. I was cold and dead. She never had time for me, I wasn't important, especially back then when I didn't know how to turn it all off, back when I was stuck being _me _and she hated me for it..."

Damon couldn't take another second of this. He was in front of her instantly, snatching her chin up, bringing her sullen face up, her watery eyes meeting his. "Stop crying and feeling bad for yourself."

Clarissa's eyes widened, betrayed hurt flying across her face and Damon rolled his eyes, releasing her chin and whacking her on the forehead. She gave a startled cry of pain.

"You want me to take pity on you?" He hissed, trying to keep himself calm. "I won't. Because everything you're saying is drunken bullshit. There's nothing wrong with you, you brat! I fucking love the way you are, and so do _you_! Who the fuck cares, Clary? Who gives a shit if she didn't like it or what the fuck ever? Since when did _you_ give a damn? Since when are you going to let anything but _you _give a damn about how you are? And who you want to be? You're fucking free now."

He wasn't finished and didn't let her interrupt him.

"Yeah, I fucking wondered what the _hell _was wrong with you. I killed someone in front of you and you offered me napkins. You're the craziest, most spastic, person I've ever met. And it freaked me out, but I _like _it. And yeah, sometimes you throw me, but I _like _it! You came out of the fucking blue and just didn't _give a shit_. You still looked at me the same way, you treated me like everything I was doing was _normal_. You and I, we're fucked up to everyone else. But I wouldn't have you any other way. And you wouldn't have me any other way."

Clarissa was staring at him so desperately and it made him feel ill. He hated her like this, he hated that he hadn't fucking _realized _there was a small part of her that was still so hurt. He gently took her face in his palms, his thumbs stroking her cheeks.

"I _know _you," he continued quietly. "I've _felt _every inch of you. There's nothing you can hide from me. I know you won't let fucking anyone tear you down ever again. Not even me." He hesitated, swallowing thickly. "Between the two of us, you'd survive, you'd fight for your happiness, while I… I'd just _die_ if I ever lost you."

A dazzling grin flew across her face and she wrapped her arms around his torso, nuzzling her face into his shirt. "I love you so much, Damon!"

He choked on a sharp intake of air, his heart flying into his throat. She was _drunk_. She didn't _mean _it. But that didn't stop his heart from pounding almost painfully in his chest, a tremble running through him.

"Clarissa," he breathed quietly, shifting her. She was passed out. In his arms. Of course she was. _Of course_. Damon groaned, letting his head fall back to glare at the ceiling. Being sober really, _really_, sucked.

* * *

Saturday, October 16th

* * *

I wanted to die.

Not only did my head have this persistent pressure that thundered and pounded against my skull until my teeth ached, and just being conscious made my stomach twirl and spin with painful nausea, but I remembered everything I had said to Damon while drunk.

Every. Single. Word.

Including the Big L word.

Never before had the phrase _fuck my life _been more appropriate and accurate.

How the hell was I supposed to take that back? What was worse, Damon hadn't texted me. In fact, it was a little after ten in the morning, and he was nowhere to be found. _Was he avoiding me_…? Goddamn it.

I was currently hating life and wishing for death in the bathroom, the lights off, curled around my new best friend, the toilet. My face was in my arms which were on top of the toilet seat and Jenna was sitting on the floor next to me, her back resting against the sink, a bottle of water in hand.

"Do you?" She wondered quietly as my stomach heaved.

"I'm not emotionally ready to love him yet," I managed out as the room decided to start spinning again despite my eyes being shut. "So it doesn't really matter if I do or not. I have to get to the part where I can accept it…" I knew I really cared about Damon, but I didn't know if could honestly say it was love yet.

"Why are you so well adjusted?" Jenna grumbled and I nearly laughed only to cringe. Hate. So much hate.

"I'm not," I breathed. "I'm the one keeled over in front of the toilet. I'm not sure how _well adjusted _that is."

She was quiet for a while and I knew, even being hungover, that she was preparing herself to bring something up.

"Just spill," I groaned, my head throbbing.

"I know you don't like Logan, but…" Jenna began and I knew where this was headed. Fuck Logan. "I—I don't know, do you think that he's…"

"Honest about how he feels about you?" I offered when Jenna floundered helplessly, trailing off midsentence. I cracked an eye open and she nodded, looking back at me awkwardly. "Yeah. The jerk loves you. It's obvious. But sometimes that's not good enough, doesn't mean it's the _right reason _to be with someone. He knows how to get under your skin but he can't erase the hurt he's caused, and you'll always feel suspicious. I think he feels like he has to settle down suddenly…" I paused, and offered a faint grin. "_And_ Alaric is super cute."

Jenna was fighting the grin. She had the biggest crush on him, it was so loud on her face. "How can I even consider Ric? He was married to your _birth mom_!"

Like that meant anything.

"Who forsake him, got with Damon, and pranced off as a vampire." I groaned, feeling sick all over again. "At least when Elena writes her novels, she'll already have a messed up plot nobody will believe is non-fiction. She can call her books _The Vampire Diaries_…" I'm so clever.

* * *

It was a little after three in the afternoon when I was starting to feel better. Thank God for sleep and a really understanding aunt who made sure the house was mostly quiet. Jenna figured it was punishment enough that I was feeling so sick, not that she would have _punished _me as both Jeremy and Elena already had a lot of experience with being drunk. I scowled at my blurry cellphone, the only texts being from Noah who was worried I choked on my own vomit and died.

And no texts from Damon.

Shit.

I rolled around and my heart jumped as I found said vampire sitting on the edge of my bed, staring down at me. Jesus Christ. He looked so devastatingly beautiful, with his bright blue eyes, messy I-Don't-Give-A-Shit raven hair, and his _bad boy _leather jacket on. His sinful mouth quirked upward into a smirk and I wondered why he was having such an effect on me today.

"How are you feelin', Drunky?" He teased playfully, and I felt like I hadn't heard his voice in a thousand years. It seeped into me, warming and lighting me up despite the left over nausea that clung to me. All my anxieties fled.

"I had three shots of Jack Daniels," I croaked unhappily, moving so that I was on my back, clasping my hands over my still queasy stomach. Damon looked amused. "I never want to drink again."

"Only _three _shots?" Damon was flat out smirking mockingly at me. "You're a lightweight."

"I was singing after the first shot." I admitted after a moment and he chuckled quietly. My stomach squirmed and I knew it had nothing to do with being hungover. I drew in a breath, preparing myself, as the nerves awkwardly tumbled through me. "Damon… I… about last night," I began anxiously, struggling with how to even bring this up. "I just…"

His fingertips flew over my mouth and he was hovering over me faster than I could register, his forehead brushing against mine as he stroked my lips. My heart hummed nervously.

"Don't," he murmured. "Don't say you don't love me, Clarissa, don't ever say it, I won't…" my heart twisted in my chest. "I know. You were _drunk_, you didn't mean it."

I wasn't even sure if I didn't mean it. But that had to mean something, right? If you love someone, _you'd know_.

"I'm sorry," I breathed nervously as his mouth moved across my face slowly, each kiss lingering longer than the last. "I mean, about _everything_. Especially crying on you." Especially _throwing_ myself at you.

Damon froze, lifting his head, blue eyes sweeping across my face, and I stared back, confused by the sudden intensity that he was staring at me with. "I can't promise you that you won't be sad forever, or that you'll ever _really _be over your past, because it'll stick with you. My shit stuck with me. Everyone's does." Gently, he caressed my cheek and I gaped back at him, my heart loud. "And I can't promise that I'll never hurt you. I know I'm going to make you cry. Hell, you're going to make _me _cry. We'll fight. But I'll _never _want you to change, and I'll _never _think anything is wrong with you—even if you have me screaming at you, even if I'm pissed to hell, or hurt, or whatever."

I felt like I was going to burst wide open with all the conflicting emotions inside of me, the primary being a sad kind of happiness. Throwing my arms around Damon, I buried my face into the crook of his neck. I just needed to breathe him in, needed him to completely surround me. He was always so warm, always smelling so good. Everything about him was so familiar, he was my favorite place, an anchor. It was like coming home after a really shitty day. I pressed my face lightly against his neck, his skin on mine bringing a whooshing relief throughout my entire body and I knew, no matter what, everything would be okay as long as he was here. Even if it was the end of the world, it would all still be okay.

I clung to him, realizing how stupidly close I was. It was going to happen, every time he opened his mouth and spout out this crap, I was falling closer and closer. Once he had my all whole heart—what then? There was no stopping this, and it scared me that I didn't want to stop it. It scared me that I wanted him to have every piece of me. It scared me how there wasn't a single doubt in my body that once he held every piece of me, he would cherish those pieces._  
_

"Just don't leave," I whispered. "Don't leave me alone. Even if we're fighting, and you want to punch me in my face, and I tell you to fuck off, don't leave me alone."

Damon pulled me up into his lap, his arms coming around me. "I won't leave you, Clarissa."

I was melting into him.

"Even if you're pissed?"

He snorted, gently pushing me back on his lap, smirking, blue eyes bright. "Especially if I'm pissed."

"Dude," Jeremy's voice cut in, completely ruining the weird moment I was having. I didn't care what Damon said, there was something _wrong _with me. Especially since us talking about being sad forever and making each other cry was making me feel giddy and dumb. "Next time I'll just wake her myself. It's been like fifteen minutes."

I nearly screamed when Damon sprang to his feet, easily lifting me in his arms. "Dude," he mocked back as I focused on calming my racing heart. Forget what I said! To hell with vampires! Nausea struck and I groaned. Hating life. Hating life _so hard_. "It's been like five. And we were about to come downstairs."

Jeremy shot us a look. "_Uh huh_. Well, hurry up. They've devoured half the plate already." At my confused look, Jeremy grinned. "You didn't tell her?"

Didn't tell me? Didn't tell me _what_?

"I hadn't gotten to that part yet, no," Damon murmured as he followed Jeremy down the hall. I frowned. What was so important that I couldn't lay in bed forever?

"We made pot brownies," Jeremy grinned widely at my unspoken question and I stared back at him. They made pot brownies…? "Stefan and Elena have eaten like five each. They're stoned out of their minds."

Oh.

My.

God.

"_No_," I gasped between laughter and Jeremy nodded.

"_Yes_!"

We entered the living room. Elena was laying across the floor with the plate of brownies on her stomach, giggling hysterically. Stefan was smirking deviously, in the process of making... A blanket fort?

"Jeremy may enter," Stefan said, flicking an eyebrow upward as he looked over at Damon and I. "But _you _two may not. Sorry, losers aren't invited."

Did Stefan seriously call me a loser? Damon snorted, dropping me on the couch and plopping down next to me. Elena sat up, throwing her face into my legs and rubbing against them like some kind of tripping out cat.

"Bite me." I shot back to Stefan and was horrified when he threw me a fanged smirk.

"Sorry, I'm not really interested in the community bloodbag, sweetheart," Stefan replied with a disinterested roll of his shoulders. _Holy shit_. Stefan was like a completely different person when stoned!

That bitch!

"_Burn_," Jeremy laughed and I ripped a pillow off the couch, smacking him with it as he walked by. Right in the nuts. He groaned and toppled over. _Ha_. Success is delicious.

_THAWK_.

Damon was suddenly in front of Stefan, whose face was now planted into the wall. That looked like it kind of hurt and I hoped there wasn't a hole in the wall. Jenna would have a fit.

"Don't be a dick." Damon suggested lightly, slamming Stefan's face further into the wall. I heard a crack and I hoped it was Stefan's face and _not _the wall. But it was probably the wall. "You don't talk to Clary like that," Damon continued pleasantly and I might've been swooning.

"These brownies are so good," Elena moaned happily as Jeremy crawled up onto the couch next to me.

"He's like an attack dog," Jeremy said, sprawling out, his head on my lap. "He should follow me around and beat people up if they talk shit about me." I was like eighty percent sure Jeremy had a brownie. "Like, he'll carry around one of those old boomboxes and play Greaser music and snap his fingers as he walks behind me..."

Yeah, he was stoned, too.

Elena suddenly dropped the brownie she was holding, her eyes widening. She looked down at herself, picking at her shirt. "I'm naked."

_Oh my God_.

"No you're not." I assured my twin but she raised her round eyes to meet mine, nodding slowly.

"I'm… I'm naked. I'm naked! Under these clothes, I'm completely naked! We're all sitting here, naked!" Elena cried, looking devastated. Stefan was suddenly in front of her, smirking suggestively and Elena smacked his hands away with a giggle. "Don't look, Stefan! Don't look at my nakedness!"

"Holy shit, Laney, calm down, you're not naked." Jeremy rolled his eyes dramatically, swiping another brownie off the plate as Damon and I exchanged amused looks.

Fuck it.

"Give me a brownie." We should _all _be stoned.

* * *

"Go left," I advised from the backseat. "Always go left." Left was the correct path. Every destination could be reached by going left. I had looked deeply within my true inner self and I had recognized this as the universal truth. Damon snorted with laughter, nuzzling into my neck affectionately.

"Yeah, Stef, go left! Go left, go left, go left!" Damon chanted giddily, resting his chin on my shoulder and kicking the driver seat. I felt so in sync with Damon, like on a whole new level. It was beyond anything humanly possible. It came to me, and now I understood the boy band N'sync. This was a sign. This was my spirit band.

"That's not how you get to the store." Stefan shushed us loudly. "You two are idiots. I know what I'm doing." I smiled peacefully, reading between the lines. Stefan was clearly asking for directions. We were tight like that. He could say one thing, but his soul told me another.

"Guys," Jeremy suddenly cut in, leaning on my other shoulder, grinning widely. "Guys. Nacho cheese. _Not cho cheeeeese_!"

Elena shrieked with laughter. "Nacho cheeese! Not cho cheeese! Not _your _cheeeeese!Oh! Oh! We should get that!"

"That's why we're going to the store, Elena," Stefan informed her and she gasped, turning around to grin at us. I smiled back happily. This was my family. My beautiful family.

* * *

"What about this?" Elena asked dolefully, raising her big eyes to Stefan adoringly, holding out the packet of sliced cheese. "Can we get this? I want this. What do you think, Clare? What does the universe say?" Elena had been made aware of how connected I was to the way of the world. The Lifestream and I were one.

Damon suddenly appeared with a bowl on his head, smacking the cheese from her hands. "Not your cheese!" He raised a wooden spoon from inside his sleeve, as though it were his hand. "Arggg, matey, this be a robbin'!" And disappeared.

He had found his true calling as the pirate of the Price Rite Shopping Center. I was proud. Infinitely proud.

* * *

"I had another idea," Jeremy pipped happily from inside the shopping cart, an open box of Lucky Charms laid across his chest. I merrily pushed the chart as Elena skipped around us, pulling various things from the shelves and placing them in the cart. I had informed her of using her inner self to find which items to buy, as the universe knew what we would want. "We start a band. Just the three of us. The Gilberts. And we tour the country. But it's actually a front where we help newly transitioned vampires."

"That's what I want to do!" Elena cried passionately and I nodded. It all made sense.

I rounded a corner and wasn't surprised to find Stefan and Damon, as naturally taking lefts would have led us back to them eventually. It's how the universe worked. Stefan was force-choking Damon, as the two had soon realized they were actually Jedi vampires.

* * *

After coming down from the high, Elena had been, initially, furious at Jeremy and Damon for giving her pot brownies, but after an hour or so, she had said she now had a better understanding of why he had chosen to be high all the time rather than deal with _mom _and _dad_'s death. We had gotten her to admit being high was _fun _and far from harmful.

That didn't stop Jenna from grounding us for wrecking the living room, though.

* * *

Tuesday, October 19th

* * *

English was _stupid_ and it wasn't my fault that I had forgotten to write three paragraphs analyzing a poem about a _flower_. What if the writer had no ulterior meaning? What if, now bear with me on this revolutionary thinking here, _what if _it's just a poem? About a flower. And there _is _no symbolism…? _Gasp_!

"I can't believe it!" Bonnie grumbled angrily next to me as I leaned against the locker, quickly trying to bullshit this paper before the bell rang. "I was just talking to Care, and he grabbed her! Like yanked her _arm_! Which was rude as hell, and when I said so, Care defended him!"

"When I was drunk I tried to push him down the stairs." Apparently when I drank, trying to kill people was _okay_. Bonnie snorted, clearly approving. See? "Do you think the flower coming out of the ground symbolizes our need to get back in touch with the planet and move away from technology?"

"I said it was about being reborn." Bonnie sighed, distracted, and clearly still in a mood about James being a prick. I friggin' called it.

"Is that for English?" Stefan wondered in amusement as he appeared to my left.

"You're old, Steffy," I said pleasantly. "This has to be, what? The seven hundredth time you've gone to high school? Throw some bullshit at me, you know what teachers eat up."

"Clare!" Bonnie scolded but I ignored her. I could be rude to Stefan all I wanted.

He raised his eyebrows sassily. "I hate to say this Clare, but you've run out of time."

Icy terror slammed into me and I sucked in a breath sharply. I could feel the color being ripped from me, every inch of my body stiffening. The hairs on the back of my neck rose as my skin prickled, a sinking horror gnawing at my tense body, urging me to run. _I was dreaming_.

It wouldn't be the first time he killed me in school, and it wasn't the first time that he tried to trick me into believing he was _good Stefan _either.

_Oh God, oh God, oh God_.

Slowly, I turned, glancing at Stefan from the corner of my eye.

I could do it.

I could stab him with the pen and make a run for it.

He hadn't pinned me down yet. I could just _run_.

I had to run!

I needed to run!

"Clare…?" Stefan stepped closer and I scrambled backwards, my heart slamming so hard in my chest I could hardly breathe. I fumbled with the pen, staring at the mock concerned Stefan in a fear. Please, not again. Please, please, please. Just let me wake up.

"What's wrong?" Bonnie asked, trying to pull me closer, but I smacked her hands away. I couldn't trust her, not when I knew how these dreams could be. I couldn't trust anyone! "You're shaking, what's wrong?"

I shoved her into Stefan and quickly darted away, scrambling and weaving between the throngs of people. He was going to hunt me. That's what he _did_. He was going to hunt me down. He liked it when I tried to run, he liked catching up to me. What do I do?

I need to defend myself!

I wouldn't let him kill me this time!

No, no… this time would be different…

_Alaric_.

If this was my dream, then maybe my subconscious would pull things in from the real world. I had no doubt that Alaric kept stakes with him in school. He seemed like the kind of guy who would. Or at least, hopefully since that's what I believed, it would appear in his locker in the faculty lounge. If I could get there before Stefan caught up to me…

I tore the door to the faculty lounge open, my heart slamming in my chest, as I scrambled to the lockers. Please don't be locked, please, oh God, please don't be locked. I spotted Alaric's name, lunging at it, rushing frantically through his stuff, nearly unable to pick up what looked like a homemade nerf gun.

"…Rissa?"

Panic shot through me and I jerked around, gasping for air, as Alaric slowly stood from the table he had been sitting at. I took a few hasty steps back as his gaze flickered down to _whatever _the hell this thing was that I was shakily gripping.

I couldn't trust him.

"What's going on?" He slowly slid around the side of the table, halting when I aimed it at him. He rose his hands as though surrendering, but I knew it was all a part of the _game_. Make me _think _I'm safe just to rip that from me. "Did someone do something to you? …Ris," he lowered his voice. "I can help you. Tell me what's going on."

I shook my head, taking small steps backwards, tensing. My back hit the lockers.

"I'm not a vampire." He promised quietly. "You _know _I'm not."

"Clarissa."

I flinched at the sound of my own name which was spoken so quietly but might as well been shouted at me.

_Damon_.

I turned slowly, disbelievingly, seeing him standing in the room. _Here_. For me. I lowered the handmade weapon, for a glorious, single, moment believing I was safe, my heart leaping.

But Stefan had done this to me before.

I squeezed the trigger causing a stake to fly out with a _WHAMP_. My heart skipped as it sailed past Damon, impaling the wall some feet from him. Damon—_Stefan_—whipped his head around and then glanced back at me, as though he couldn't believe what he was seeing.

"Shit, Clary! It's _me_!" Stefan-Damon sputtered, looking so confused, and so much like Damon that I just couldn't stand it.

"Don't kill me as him!" I whispered, squeezing the trigger, only to have nothing happen. Frightened tears stung my eyes and I released a choked sob. This couldn't be happening to me! I needed another stake! I needed to keep him _away_! "No, no, no! Work! Damn it!"

"What did you do to her?" Alaric said quietly, trying to distract me. Trying to _trick _me!

"Shut up." Stefan-Damon growled. "She thinks she's _dreaming_." His blue eyes pinned me down and I couldn't breathe. "Clary, I _swear_, you are not dreaming. This is _real_. It's okay."

I let the handmade weapon fall from my numbed fingers, shaking so bad I was starting to feel dizzy. "Please, Stefan," I begged miserably, bile rising in my throat. "_Please_. I can't…" My body remembered every pain so vividly. "Please don't kill me anymore." Panic struck, desperation seeping through as the world spun around me. I couldn't do this. I couldn't, _couldn't_! "I'll do wh-whatever you want! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please!"

I couldn't _breathe_.

I choked, coughing, desperately trying to bring air back into my lungs. I crumbled to the ground, the tears spilling over. I hated being so weak, so helpless, I _hated _that I was giving him exactly what he wanted. But I was terrified. I was terrified of the pain.

Stefan was _creative_.

"He would never hurt you. _I _would _never _let anyone hurt you, Clarissa. Never."

A cold numbness crawled through me and I stared back at the fake Damon grimly, a hopelessness filling me. There was no escape and I was mentally tired, emotionally exhausted. He was so convincing but I've heard it all before. "The real Damon has already killed me a few times over, so the one who doesn't care about me is going to do so much worse." I drew my knees to my chest, hugging them tightly. The guilt stricken horror on his face only made me feel sick inside. "No more games. Just do it." My voice cracked but playing this game, letting it drag out, always made it so much worse.

Always.

I couldn't run from this.

_Trapped_.

Dream Ripper Stefan liked to hunt me, he liked to draw it out. He liked to play tricks with my mind. But he had never gone after me emotionally. This was a first.

And it was going to bring a whole new kind of pain with him wearing Damon's face.

"Clarissa…" Damon whispered, his face crinkling. "You're not dreaming. _I swear_."

"Has he hurt you?" I jumped at the sound of Alaric's cold voice—I'd forgotten he was here.

"I've just fucking murdered her a few times! No big deal _Ricky_." Stefan-Damon sneered back acidly with a sarcastic grin. "If you want to remain alive, I suggest you _screw off_, or the next neck I snap will be _yours_."

A whole new sense of panic slammed into me. "_Don't_," I blurted out in a strangled gasp.

"Why the fuck not? You don't give a shit about him, Clary! It's those fucking puffball fairies! They're fucking doing _all _of this to you! You're not dreaming! And you don't actually care about _him_!" Stefan-Damon suddenly exploded and I recoiled, struggling to breathe as terror tore through me. I've made him angry, I've made him angry, _he's angry, _oh God_, he's angry!_ He hissed furiously. "Stop looking at me like that!"

"I think you need to step away from Rissa," Alaric said coolly and my heart jerked as he stepped closer. I scrambled backwards, hitting the lockers hard. A growl erupted from Stefan-Damon and he flitted in front of Alaric, shoving him backwards.

Maybe… they would fight each other, and I could sneak away. I glanced toward the door and then back just as a _WHOOSH_ sounded followed by shattering glass on the wall across from me.

"Hidden stakes in your sleeve?" Damon scoffed as I leaned forward, keeping my eyes on the two of them, my fingers groping for a shard of glass. "Real classy there, Altair! Think you're some fucking Van Helsing? That you can just come into _my town _and stake me with some cheesy homemade vampire killing bullshit?"

Curling my fingers around a sharp of glass, I slowly rose and began slinking toward the door, trying to control my breathing as my heart pounded. Damon—_Stefan_—was suddenly in front of me, grabbing my arm and pulling me closer. Terror twisted painfully in my stomach and he growled.

"This is fucking bullshit and I'm ending it," Stefan-Damon said and I froze, staring at him in horror. I gasped as he hissed, tearing the necklace Jeremy had gotten me from my neck and tossing it carelessly.

He was going to compel me, I realized with a growing sense of horrified dread. He had never done that before, and I couldn't imagine what misery he was about to make me inflict on _myself_. _I was Clarissa_, goddamn it. I was not about to take this laying down! _One more chance to flee_. Steeling myself, I took a quick breath, and slammed the shard as hard as I could into his chest. Stefan-Damon looked at me, as if stunned, his grip loosening and I yanked the glass out.

"Compel _this_," I choked fearfully, impaling the shard into his eye. The _squish _made me cringe, bile burning in my throat as he hissed furiously, staggering backwards.

I stumbled on my own feet as I darted to the door.

I made it into the empty hallway, the door shutting behind me with a deafening _thud_. What now? Where did I go? Where could I go? A hand clamped over my mouth, muffling my scream, and my gut twisted in frightened horror as Stefan backed me into the wall.

_Can't breathe, can't breathe, can't breathe_.

He's going to kill me!

_No, no, no, no!_

He's going to make it _hurt_!

Why isn't he blind…?

I shouldn't have run!

"_Please_," I sobbed hopelessly, my voice muffled by his palm. His image blurred as hot tears spilled over. "_Please, Stefan_."

"I would _never _hurt you." He lied, shaky voice and all. "You're going to go to sleep for a few hours now, okay? Go to sleep for a few hours, Clare, go to sleep."

Exhaustion slammed into me.

* * *

cackles.

f u damon, stab u in da face.

i know, 9k words seem horribly short compared to the 17k monsters i usually puke out, but i'm trying to post chapters weekly and with the shitstorm of UNENDING DRAMA that is my life, i'm not really sure what the next few days are going to be like.

also you guys, i've finally started watching Supernatural. ON SEASON 2. I'm a Yellow-Eyes Demon fangirl, I love him 5-ever. "TERaN HE RUINED SAM AND DEAN'S LIFE" okAY YOU GUYS RUINED MINE BY GETTING ME INTO THIS SHOW OKAY. I WENT INTO THIS THINKING GAY ANGELS AND NOT "OH GOD WHAT IS THIS" WHILE HIDING UNDER A BLANKET AND SOBBING BECAUSE SCARY.

**Q: WTF ALARIC-CLARISSA WHY FEELS?**  
I'm going to try to explain without giving away spoilers. I'll be able to explain it a lot better VERY soon once I finally fucking reveal this shit. Fae law guys. Isobel "belongs" to Fae because she's a part of Clarissa, being her birth mom and shit and other reasons. Isobel love(s)d Alaric, which means _Alaric _belongs to Fae, which means he must be protected. Fae have a bit of a hive mind going on. It doesn't matter what Clarissa does, she's still (mostly) Fae and so influenced by that. No worries, she and Alaric will develop a real relationship very soon.

gah.

anyway.

wish me luck.

hoped you enjoyed, thank you all for continuing to stick with me. hope you guys have a great weekend. hope everything in your life is drama free! love you guys, seriously.


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